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DateTitreDurée
02 Jan 2019Self-Defending Eyes00:25:47
Some eye science, dirty tricks at a Scouse card game, the stray man, Sam's hero fantasies, Andy's Blackpool death and the disgrace that is Roy Orbison...

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12 Aug 2021The Melchester Odyssey - Part 7600:32:15

A 1960s flashback, and Roy’s comeback is halted by talk of music centres, catalogues and buying old stuff that we don’t need. (Rec: 12/11/20)

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03 Mar 2021The Keegan Hamburg Odyssey - Part 100:33:19

Our deep dive into Brian Moore’s 1979 ITV electric mouse documentary begins. (Rec: 3/6/20)

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30 Apr 2021Top Flight Tune Machine - 28/06/1984 - Part 400:34:24

Beautiful Green, Midge’s meltdown sex-fest, car crash perviness and climax prevention. (Rec: 26/7/20)

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11 May 2020New Fox00:39:47
Over-caffeining, meeting your heroes, garage boxing, more crow stuff, and an unusual house guest.

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02 Aug 2021Sausage Talc00:22:51

Our open prison dreams revived, a semi-legal Thames ferry, hospital skiving, and a meat pie barber.

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04 Feb 2020Almost Live From Leeds00:26:42
Backstage at our latest live show, a mailbag delve, the cosmos, some riddles, and Scotland’s best bear.

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04 Jun 2021The Magna Banta00:38:10

Graffiti, gangs, college culture, having a night out, celeb selfies, and a Wayne Rooney opinion.

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13 Dec 2019Don’t Fear… Love00:36:01
An election debrief, night-time toilet trips, and almost killing someone by mistake…

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19 Aug 2020The Melchester Odyssey - Part 2500:34:30
‘Planing’ the magazine world, doing odd jobs for Rod Stewart, end-of-season celebrations, some talc, and an exciting new project for Roy. (Rec: 20/11/19)

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25 Jan 2021Lampard Sacked00:25:42
An emergency pod about Frank Lampard’s dismissal from Chelsea that ends up being about David Batty instead.

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21 Oct 2019‘Give Us Some Readies You Mug!’00:35:18
A look back at the weekend’s football… but to be honest, it’s mostly about Danny Dyer’s BBC1 gameshow ‘The Wall’.

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18 Nov 2020The Owen Odyssey - Part 400:35:39
The TFTM reach, sea filings, Owen gets mugged off by Shearer and asks his parents for World Cup penalty tips. (Rec: 19/4/20)

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20 Jul 2021Life Logistics - Rogue Cockerel00:36:53

The nature of cults, pancake prison, body image, cat theft, and rip-off publishing. (Rec: 20/10/20)

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27 Sep 2019Eazy-E’s Admin Day00:33:50
We reveal our Wu names, admonish certain UK cities, look back AND forward to nuclear armageddon, and predict a few football matches.

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03 Mar 2020Nan And The Cup Final Ticket00:33:24
How to act tough in a chippy, Biscoff love and Eric Bristow gets A Question of Sport wrong.

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07 May 2021The Hippie Conundrum00:36:54

Touchline Lamparding, a coffee tasting, gentle telly, mending stuff, a truck ride, and the Richard O’Sullivan story.

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18 Nov 2019Dr Zimmerman’s Sweat Clinic00:24:18
Recorded live backstage in Cardiff, we reflect on the Prince Andrew interview and, erm, Radiohead... 

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20 Mar 2020Shut The Pubs!00:33:00
We’ve made a viral video which prompted the government to give everyone free cash – how will this affect ResultBot’s robot money pipe?

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09 Jul 2019Human Barbecue00:35:54
A mailbag delve including some Dis ‘n’ Dat tales, the nature of hotels and the notion of trust, holiday pets, summer fairs, and lots more…

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31 Aug 2018BONUS: News Thing00:40:49
If you haven’t heard our other podcast, now’s your chance. It’s basically TFTM but with news instead of football. This latest episode includes sky murdering, sacred shield abuse and a live cat v squirrel fight. Search ‘News Thing’ in your pod-providing app for more.

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21 Jan 2020Bigger Than JFK00:32:47
Ongoing personal highs and lows, some fine riddle work and a bit of actual football chat…

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11 Feb 2021The Melchester Odyssey - Part 5000:41:07

Roy coaches Elton Blake, the pressures of kicking a football, some childhood pain revisited, and Trevor Brinsden returns.

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11 Feb 2019The Nature of Greed00:32:19
We pitch a underground disaster movie to David Lynch, look into river-on-river violence, and explore Frank Lampard's bid for automatic promotion based on good manners...

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16 Jun 2019Earth Tournament 2019 Update00:28:57
A bonus episode, rounding up all of the Earth Tournament 2019 group stage action and the full draw for the second round. PLUS... an exclusive major transfer announcement.

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15 Jul 2021The Melchester Odyssey - Part 7200:33:35

An underwhelming surprise, plans for a set-up, a golden ball, garden potato fun, and Rovers get carried away. (Rec: 15/10/20)

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20 Jan 2020Timbrell Update00:35:01
Court reporting, Keane v Carragher, influencing and more…

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12 Oct 2018Clockwork Keegan00:37:56
England’s new fictional squad of youngsters dissected, some insight at the Tactics Board, and will a bewigged and bobble-hatted Andy play for the Faroe Islands tonight?

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31 May 2019The Coin King00:34:36
Plans for our first West End musical are hatched, Sam reports from the Isle of Wight and we consider a home coin drop experience…

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13 Nov 2020All The Trimmings00:41:41
The Sid James/Peter Sutcliffe connection, Broadmoor Christmas dinner, more parental humiliation, and reggae.

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26 Oct 2018‘Brian? It’s Bryan…’00:36:27
Sam’s brother tries a power play on Sheffield Wednesday’s owner, Ferry begs Eno to hook him up with ITV and we look ahead to the weekend’s football action…

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12 Mar 2021Mould Death Panic00:44:49

MOT stuff, frosted nudity, scaffolding, screenwash, chip failure.

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02 Nov 2020'Daddy, Why Did You Lie?’00:33:37
Herr Bauer’s press button, the soil at Burnham Beeches, frisbee dog, and the Premier League’s new name.

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24 Dec 2018Alien Meeting00:40:17
An inappropriate Nan Santa scene, a Likely Lads look back, predictions, and some woodland extra-terrestrial team bonding. Oh, and what REALLY happened to Sam from Me & My Girl…

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17 Sep 2019How To Get Away With Murder00:36:57
Shelley, Marc Bolan, Gary Lineker, Dale Winton, a roof dad and more from Yanni’s bar…

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03 Jun 2019Chip Shop Anxiety00:35:26
On the coins, ghosts, and a whole host of chip-related stories…

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03 Jun 2021The Melchester Odyssey - Part 6600:42:34

Roy wakes up and the Rovers are spurred on as Sir Alf plans his future. Meanwhile Blackie gets emotional again, and we encounter a rugby doctor. (Rec: 3/9/20)

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26 Apr 2021Posting Dead Wasps00:32:29

Animals on YouTube, Sam’s Hinterland, Oscar’s birthday, Archie’s one-way ticket, and Leniverse politics.

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05 Dec 20182007-200800:35:01
Some eye-opening revelations about Sir David Attenborough, a limo trip to Wigan, leg-breaking on The One Show, and some football stuff…

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21 May 2021The King Of Digging00:43:10

A swingball routine, clambering up velvet, a civilising challenge, and prediction mayhem.

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01 Mar 2019Bonds... Or Hurlock?00:32:47
Sam’s prediction downfall veers into view, we foresee a West Ham stand-unveiling ambush, plus some mailbag delving…

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16 Apr 2021Prescription Thrills00:27:09
The healthy World Cup, destroying letters, an unsettling pharmacy experience, and Sam’s medical records.

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20 Dec 2020Mouse Emergency!00:48:11
Sam discovered a mouse infestation in his rig - here’s what happened next…

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25 Oct 2019The Episode Is Operational00:40:40
We delve into the ghost book again, predict a bit of football, and learn more about Michael Hutchence…

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24 May 2019Tell Me It!00:34:09
Weekend World, cream cakes and Sam as the new Tory Prime Minister…

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08 Jan 2020Outer Space Social Services00:31:14
Andy’s solo Christmas Day, the Delaneys’ Boxing Day party, sawdust lessons and will there be telly redemption for Sam?

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11 Feb 2020Identical Shep00:33:13
Tom & Jerry, Stubby the war dog, more Blue Peter revelations and a first-hand encounter with Wojtek.

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10 Mar 2021The Keegan Hamburg Odyssey - Part 200:32:34

Money, German life confusion, a friendly red card, buckets of petrol, unpleasant meat, and eating a doughnut before you pay for it. (Rec: 10/6/20)

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20 Jun 2020Humans of Honour - Mick Talbot00:50:52
He's the keyboard king who was 50% of The Style Council and enjoyed spells with Dexy's Midnight Runners and Roger Daltrey and Wilko Johnson - and we've interrogated him just for you.

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01 Nov 2019Soldering And A Wild Tortoise00:35:30
Pretty much just that - soldering and a wild tortoise.

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28 May 2019The Hermit00:43:03
The ‘triggerproof' card, Sam’s experience of working with Jerry Springer, a school ice cream turf war, and a report from a National Trust compound…

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01 Aug 2021Humans Of Honour/The Reset - Seth Meyers00:26:18

We felt that Sam's recent interview with US comedy legend Seth Meyers for his 'The Reset' series was also worthy of 'Humans Of Honour' status - so here it is.

 

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07 Jan 2020Celebrity New Mum-Spotting00:34:10
We’re back! The viewfinder, Bruce Forsyth, the SAS, a murder, and a feminism update.

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27 May 2021The Melchester Odyssey - Part 6500:33:09

Sir Alf’s gap year, stolen tracksuits and eye-popping tactics, plus police racism and a bedside development. (Rec: 27/8/20)

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29 Mar 2019A Cheeky Hamlet00:36:51
Illicit underage booze buying, a winding revival, ball injuries, a stray beach man and that…

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09 Apr 2019Hand Cream?00:35:31
A farm offer, a stray man’s robot encounter, Strike It Lucky on Ecstasy, and a homemade cannon… 

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07 Jun 2021Bring Back Ashtrays00:43:07

Family camping hell, getting a tab, our candle plans, and Southgate’s psychedelic selections.

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03 Feb 2021The Snow White Odyssey – Part 700:34:12

Nicknames, our Radio 2 future, oxen, hot objects, Dutch bungalows, and Doc’s back story. (Rec: 6/5/20)

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25 Feb 2021The Melchester Odyssey - Part 5200:31:56

Roy dishes out some on-pitch justice and some class politics, Ben Galloway gets involved and we hear about Roy’s book club. (Rec: 28/5/20)

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01 Feb 2019Mouse!00:34:10
Can newborn babies see? Can a cat talk? Can dogs work in benefits offices? Is predicting like heavyweight boxing? Can you coax a tapeworm out with fruit? And some football stuff...

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10 Sep 2019Hello Again From London00:22:58
The final of our cosy backstage chats from our live tour in which we talk about alcoholism and a top gangster’s bodily fluids… 

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22 Nov 2019Unlucky Van Man00:28:40
Exotic hipster football, reviews of a couple of new films, a book giveaway and some football predicting…

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11 Jul 2021Top Flight Tune Machine - 18/02/1987 Part 100:34:12

American trousers, dressing like the rappers, Geordie Jeans, our live singing history and podding for ghosts. (Rec: 4/10/20)

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07 Feb 2020Dental Hijacking00:32:24
Sam’s hygienist tries to entice him, we celebrate John Noakes, hear more from the cosmos and start a choose-your-own-adventure… 

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19 Mar 2020The Melchester Odyssey - Part 300:39:43
Roy drops a transfer bombshell, the Portdean fans run wild at Melboro, we meet Penny Race and Roy gets his chopper out…

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08 Jun 2020Up The Gelato00:33:59
Banning fans from football, ice cream queuing and the cosmos, and a couple of new games.

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14 Jan 2020Cheers, Cosmos!00:38:04
Local deaths and local horses, riddles, booze hiding, a squirrel in a school, and butcher bullying. 

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16 Aug 2019Bates, Sudoku and the Merry Widow00:36:34
We finally reveal the identity of Britain’s Best Widow while Sam recounts the late 90’s pursuit of a legendary DJ…

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30 Apr 2021Instant Coffee Discovery00:37:31

Prince Philip’s coining love, birthday crazy golf, clutch bag woe, afternoon flagging, the joy of libraries, and Dog Day.

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21 Sep 2020The Ripley Odyssey - Part 100:39:01
The start of our deep dive into Ripley’s Believe It Or Not 2020 - sorry but it’s no football and almost all animals. (Rec: 04/12/19)

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06 Apr 2019Dirty Garden Crab Boy00:38:44
Another round-up from the TFTM mailbag, including a Disney ambulance, hole exploration, the Brazilan animal lottery and Roy Keane in a maze…

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08 Apr 2021The Melchester Odyssey - Part 5800:34:24

Roy gets shot in the hair, Vic Guthrie goes Timbrell, we wonder about the human brain, and Blackie takes over. (Rec: 9/7/20)

  

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05 May 2021Fear The Thames00:26:29

An accidental episode including boats, bridges, and Bobby Moore’s dying words.

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12 Jun 2018World Cup 198200:53:16
School art displays, Naranjito’s sex life, alphabetical squad numbers, a dead OAP’s TV, squad songs, the worst assault on a football pitch EVER and Paul Breitner’s chequered past. Oh and… (Toni Polster...)

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08 Jan 2021Little Sam00:20:30

Shorter than usual due to technical issues but still time for chat about body heat, covid liars, and orange peel pens.

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23 May 2021Top Flight Tune Machine - 28/12/1994 Part 100:32:49

Brian Harvey’s jacket potato nightmare and the connection between pickling and George Formby. (Rec: 23/8/20)

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29 Jun 2020Andy Three-Hammocks00:39:28
New words to Liverpool from the rappers, leaving a speech in the pub (but not the pub that Pele is in), seagulls eating other animals, and crow grudges.

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22 Mar 2021Sybil The Parrot00:38:33

Growing strawberries, bored kids, inhaling food, and Imelda Marcos’ safari island.

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15 Apr 2021The Melchester Odyssey - Part 5900:34:44

A 60’s glimpse, Blackie takes the number 9 shirt, Kenny Logan has suspicions, and Roy lingers on the danger list. (Rec: 17/7/20)

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21 Jun 2018World Cup 199400:55:41
A yankee doodle World Cup, with ITV's anti-tan strategy, Maradona's five-drug cocktail, imaginary noncing, a tale about Steve Jones from The Pyramid Game, and the launch of the hit TV show 'Sausage Island'...

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18 Mar 2019Staring At The Ocean00:40:55

Service station ruminations, karaoke etiquette, Harris or Gallen, and saying yes to stuff you’re too embarrassed to say no to…




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28 Dec 2020The 50 Greatest British Moments - Part 400:39:23
20-11… Vardy fuel, road rage, equalising stuff, the best selfie, a bald kid, an escaped bear, and more.

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23 Mar 2019Sam and the Receptionist00:34:48
An emergency episode as Sam had some stuff he needed to share - a receptionist run-in, a school dog story and a superb sex fail/stray man saga...

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11 Jun 2019Davey The Canoe00:40:26
Some TV tips, a Cannon Dad offshoot story, Senor Dis & Dat vs a wall, and the internet spies on Sam mid-episode…

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09 Feb 2021Life Logistics - Watery Hole00:39:44

Appliance-mending YouTubers, Antipodean attention-seeking, Barry Norman’s pickled onions and a dirty old man. (Rec: 12/5/20)

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22 Jul 2020The Melchester Odyssey - Part 2100:39:39
With hordes of Rovers fans locked outside the ground, Roy gives some friendly advice to opposing captain Don Jeavons and plans retirement in the Lake District. (Rec: 24/10/19)

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21 Apr 2021The Keegan Hamburg Odyssey - Part 800:43:46

The odyssey comes to an end as Jean has her say and Kev threatens to brandish his sword as he reveals his post-football ambitions. (Rec: 22/7/20)

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14 Jun 2021Cracking Days Out00:31:02

Some football talk, the TFTM tour schedule, the tree surgeon visits, and a shocking revelation.

 

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23 Dec 2020The Snow White Odyssey - Part 100:31:47

A deserted Danish theme park, a bucket of chump, a mirror with plenty to say and our current Queen’s FIFA obsession. (Rec 25/3/20)

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30 Dec 2020The Snow White Odyssey - Part 200:32:25

The Prince arrives with a whole load of dodgy entitlement, the Queen is enraged and commissions a special box to give to the Huntsman. (Rec: 1/4/20)

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15 Nov 2019Post-Tour Exhaustion00:31:25
Reflections of our recent live shows, including the kind of people we don’t want to see at them. Plus more Pellegrini angst, and some thoughts about Barry Grant…

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19 Oct 2018Wembley Sale Collapses00:35:23
Shahid Khan's bid to buy Wembley collapses, Gwyneth Paltrow turns up in the studio next door, Eddie Howe gets enraged, plus lots more (and some predictions too).

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14 Apr 2021The Keegan Hamburg Odyssey - Part 700:30:51

Is Kev’s England place in doubt or is he a national hero? Also, dog husbandry and baby football. (Rec: 15/7/20)

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08 Jun 2020Humans of Honour - Stan Hey00:51:41
Our interview with the writer whose credits include Auf Wiedersehen Pet, The Manageress, Spender and a host of official World Cup films.

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28 Jan 2020Guts Cod00:31:19
Some listener Lamparding, football haters, crabbing horror, rig servicing, non-books, and a struggle with a riddle.

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09 Aug 20182018-2019 Season Preview00:41:44
Ahead of our new, weekly topical episodes, we’ve sent the Time Machine forwards to try and predict what will happen in the coming season. We also watched the last 20 minutes of the transfer window while we recorded the episode…

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26 Jul 2021Chopping Wood00:34:22

Holiday games rooms, a paddling pool shock, a surprise rake, and a nightmare neighbour.

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28 Sep 2020Top Flight Millionaires00:36:24
Our net worth revealed, Ghetto Heaven, swearing footballers and a painful memory from behind the Iron Curtain.

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06 Apr 2020Thank You Belgian Scientist00:33:50
Baking bread, a near-triggering, rugby horror, water cannons, swords and guess what’s back…?

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17 Mar 2020Scholes Or Varney?00:28:03
Our finest Talksport moment, plus Sam goes up the storage and gets sucked into panic-buying. Tomorrow… the broken glass story…

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