Resiliency (Antioch Resiliency)

“Retirement off-shore” is NOT why Ron and Janine Parrish are living in the tropical paradise of the Indonesian archipelago! Instead, as 60+ year-old grandparents they are making disciples and mentoring the next generation to plant churches among the 129 UPGs of this nation they love and for which they thank God daily. “We may not be addressing the thousands in front of us, but we can address those who will be addressing the thousands.”

When’s the last time you spent a good portion of your devotional time in the morning simply recounting, “How has God loved me in the past 24 hours?” and giving Him thanks and praise for all the ways?! This interview with the Parrishes was delightful journey of discovering their resilience is in their intentional cultivation of a lifestyle of gratitude. And you will not want to miss Ron’s challenging invitation at the end!

How would you respond if the month before you were to deploy to a war-torn nation, the leader of it publicly declared that any nationals who converted to Christianity would be subject to imprisonment and/or the death penalty, and any foreigners associated with that conversion would experience the same fate? Such was the case for Jonathan and Nicole 20 years ago when they first deployed to the field. Join our conversation with them as they share how they suffered alongside their neighbors in ways those neighbors could see, and it opened pathways to ministry into their lives. You'll be moved as they share from Psalm 42, how the poisoned darts of rejection, after rejection, after rejection of the gospel caused a soul weariness and pain that could only be helped and healed by bathing themselves in the Word.  A profound commitment to a culture of prayer has been their source of strength through the years.  "It's been an absolute key to our resiliency.  It's kept our hearts and hope alive."

A number of global workers have shared how difficult it is to face the loss of the holiday season. COVID-19 complicates an already difficult time of year for some people. At the request of some of those who have asked Silas to share what he has shared with them on the podcast, he draws from experience, reading and other podcasts some things he often discusses with his grieving clients. 

Resource:

The Grief Tower by Lauren Wells

"Lifes Tough Edges" by Nora Mclnerny

"Everything Happens" with Kate Bowler

Prophetic Lament by Soong-Chan Rah

Humility and a posture of learning is what it takes to make team life work according to Sandy and Steve. They go on to say that the mindset that values TEAM is as important as learning language, evangelism strategies and your new culture. It shouldn't be just another box we check off, it needs to be a major commitment. But, they say, when we make that commitment, we are setting ourselves up well for effective synergy and long term ministry. They add that its not just practical, it's theological; "We cannot separate intimacy with Jesus with learning how to relate and grow in intimacy with one another." Join Steve and Silas as we interview Steve V and Sandy H on Episode 26 of Resiliency

Melissa is a passionate education consultant for MKs and TCKs. She brings a wealth of experience to bear on the question so many of our listeners face: “What do we do about educating our kids?” From developing a philosophy of education, prefield education planning, to academic testing, Melissa gives insight and offers practical resources. This is a must-listen for every parent of a school-aged MK/TCK!

An intense season with the loss of dreams and expectations of what ministry would look like became the bedrock of John snd Erin's resiliency. It taught them that their expectations, even ministry on the field is not the end goal. God's goodness and their willingness to obey was and continues to be what it is all about.

Twenty years ago this summer, Dayna Curry was among a group of Western and Afghan NGO workers imprisoned by the Taliban in Afghanistan. While that story made international headlines, the now 22 years of cross-cultural life and Christ’s love that Dayna has shared with Muslims in three nations hasn’t made the news. In this episode, Dayna shares about the four years in Central Asia prior to that fateful day not long before 9/11 in 2001; including identifying with Afghan women to the point of being whipped and having rocks thrown at her in the street. Be on the lookout for a Resiliency Special Episode one week from today when Dayna shares the account of her imprisonment.

Have you ever had a nice vacation and when you came to the end of it, you still felt like your weren't rested or replenished? You might have been experiencing burnout. Burnout is caused when our resources and our demands are out of balance. Limited Licensed Psychologist, Andrew Brown who serves at Alongside shares with Silas how following our God given design can help us to prevent burnout by learning to listen to and respond to the rhythms of work and rest that God built into creation.

Guest Scott Shaum, author of "The Uninvited Companion" takes us on a journey into his own suffering through chronic pain and fatigue which he developed following a serious illness overseas and explores with us how his weakness has become his greatest strength. 

Having served as Reach Global's MK Coordinator for the past 20+ now, our guest knows a thing or two - well, let's make it dozens of things! - about nurturing and training up your kids from tender shoots to strong oaks. Heidi is joyful, tender-hearted, highly skilled, and incredibly well-read. Best of all, she's an MK care professional who was also an MK herself from age 2-18. You're going to want to pause the pod and jot down some of the wonderfully practical counsel, coaching, and encouragement Heidi shares during this insightful and engaging interview.

“The best thing we’ve done is…stay and provide a long-term presence.” And stay he has, as David has lived among, served, and loved the most vulnerable of the poor since 1998 in the Eastern European nation or Romania.

Silas and Steve treasured every moment sitting and talking to this long-time friend of Silas’s as he shared keys to his longevity and resilience in an extremely difficult - and rewarding - ministry. As you’ll hear, paramount among those keys is commitment to relationships and messy, challenging, but beautiful life together in community. David says this is, “The core to being able to do this for such a long time.”

Dive into the moving stories with us as David shares how those on the margins teach us how to survive in the context of poverty. “They teach us resiliency.” He tells short-termers and those who’ve joined him longer term, “Drink from the wells that the people that we’re serving among drink from.”

We loved how David helped us look at resiliency “as more of a collective and communal project, rather than just an individual one.” We hope you also love and glean some more keys to resiliency as David shares his story.

Resource: Tender Care 

In this episode, Steve and Silas are joined by guest interviewer and podcaster, Mick Murray. Mick helps Steve and Silas reflect over the past 57 episodes of Resiliency and pull out favorite parts, things they have learned and what they think are priceless moments of interviewing so many amazing guests over the past two and a half years.  

Show Notes: 

• Meditations with Mick Murray 
• Ideology with Mick Murray and Drew Steadman
• The Fathers Heart by Mick Murray
• Pain: The Gift Nobody Wants by Philip Yancy and Dr Paul Brand

Mike and his wife, Stephanie, were guests on our first ever (and most listened to) episode. Mike is back with us today to share how greater emotional awareness leads to increased resiliency. He reflects on how our emotions are with us but we are seldom with them - rarely attuned to what they are trying to say to us. Mike points out how teams and individuals who grow in their emotional awareness end up staying longer and see more fruitful ministry.

Steve and Silas want to shamelessly give a plug for this incredible ministry. Alongsidecares.net has profoundly helped thousands of people in vocational ministry over the years, including some of our very own global workers. Director, John DeKruyter joins us in this episode to tell us more about the ways Alongside can help global workers develop resiliency for their lives and ministry. 

Sometimes as expatriate believers, we underestimate how much our words impact local believers. John Weaver talks to us today about how to facilitate a culture of hearing from God in local believers--which, he says, results in resilience. He says that sometimes we get in the way of our local disciples hearing what God is saying to them because we interject our own thoughts, feelings or opinions. Instead, he encourages us to help our local believers develop a lifestyle of learning to listen to what the Holy Spirit is saying to them instead of being too quick to interject our own input. 

Henri Nouwen wrote an article "From Solitude to Community to Ministry" where he writes that it is only in knowing who we are in solitude with God that we can effectively live with one another in community and then together, do ministry. For years, Rachel has been living from that paradigm in her work among the most vulnerable children in Chisinau, Moldova. She has learned from her posture of solitude with God and from her relationships to embrace her human limitations and live free from self-condemnation. Join Steve and I in this delightful interview with Rachel Dyachenko.

Unstacking Your Grief Tower: A Guide To Processing Your Grief as an Adult Third Culture Kid by Lauren Wells

From Solitude to Community to Ministry by Henri Nouwen

Everything Happens for a Reason and Other Lies I've Loved by Kate Bowler

30 years is how long Jeff and Christine have lived, loved, and ministered in East Africa. They have a career that has spanned vocational transitions, tribal unrest, and malaria epidemics. Their resilience has been forged by drawing deeply from their Quaker roots that taught them at an early age to posture themselves to listen and to lay down their own agendas in order for God’s will to be known and done.

In this two-part interview, we return with Cindy, a veteran of over 20 years in Jakarta, Indonesia, who shares how finding belonging in her host culture was the foundation of her resilient cross-cultural life. In this episode, Cindy offers practical ways that we can develop our own sense of belonging wherever we are. 

Sometimes we have technical issues and sometimes its straight-up user error (its a fool who blames his tools...). The last episode had some recording problems that are fixed now so go ahead and listen again!

"C" and "C" have lived for years with their family in one of the most difficult countries for global workers. Listen as they share about their trust in God, their love of their country, and how they have made it for all these years by including their children in ministry, connecting intentionally with others including local friends, and finding things they love where they live. 

We were created for connection and belonging, even as we desire to be effective in ministry. As our guests in today’s episode share their stories, time and again we hear how their commitment to learning the language has led to a deeper experience of belonging, connection to local relationships, and effectiveness in ministry—all predictors of resiliency.

Silas interviews Mike and Stephanie, long-term field workers who help us understand how the more you commit to language learning and adjusting to your host culture, the lower your stress will be and the greater your resilience will be on the field. 

Today's guest, Chris P-veteran overseas church planter and pastor-had this revelation as he reveled in the rest and restoration he received and the very intentional separation he was able to make from ministry work and other responsibilities during his recent sabbatical. Hear Chris share about the powerful potential of a well-planned and executed sabbatical and a committed Sabbatical Coach.

“I worked hard (at planning and preparing) in order to receive as much as I could and did from the Lord.” Chris also shares, “You get out of it what you put into it,” and he shares practical pointer after practical pointer of soul-restoring practices, disciplines, and decisions he made and put into his sabbatical for it to become truly monumental at this 20-year mark of full-time overseas and stateside ministry.

Journey of the Soul by Bill and Kristi Gaultiere

Episode 33 (previous episodes on Sabbatical)

Episode 34

We all know that exercise is good for us. But did you know that it actually slows down aging, reverses depression and restructures our brains? Listen as Rachel Keener shares valuable research and personal passion for exercise as she encourages us to "run for our lives". 

John Dekruyter, Executive Director of Alongside Ministry, joins us again to share how he has learned the importance of Sabbath keeping. "There is no end to what needs done and what we can do. Sabbath reminds us that our identity is not in what we do. It is in the one who created us". John shares how Sabbath is not an obligatory effort, but an expectant joy. He reminds us that Sabbath helps us listen to the One who shapes our identity as His beloved not in what we produce or earn. 

Jim and Kay served for 30 years in Taiwan prior to reentering to the U.S. in 2012. They now serve as Directors of the Reentry Care System at Antioch Ministries International in Waco, TX. They share from their own (rough!) reentry experience and from insights gained from ministering to scores of reentered field workers through the years. They have a great desire to help returnees move forward healthily in the challenging - and sometimes seemingly endless - transition of reentry. In addition, they also share key elements needed in building out an effective reentry care system.

Michele has nearly two decades of life lived in North Africa and the Middle East. Join our interview with her as she shares her keys to resiliency and how she took up the invitation to live a life of adventure with Jesus 

A bi-cultural family in La Paz, Bolivia shares with us what makes them resilient. Learning to embrace one another's cultures and investing in the culture they live in has been key to making it work for Cara and Mache Contreras. But so has intentional prayer and valuing the role of their community even when community is not easy. They also share how important it is for them to let their investment in their community or team define their calling over letting a sense of external purpose define their calling. Though some technical difficulties resulted in the loss of the first ten minutes of this interview, this delightful couple challenges and inspires us that valuing what matters most in our relationships is one of the key factors that make us more resilient. 

"God gives us grace for everything that happens in your life but there is no grace for worrying about the things that don't happen..." Our young-but-wise guests share about the early stages of parenting while living in the Middle East. Join us as we launch the first of four parenting episodes. 

Secondary trauma depletes your energy, keeps you awake, numbs your heart and fragments your thoughts. If you are caring for or exposed to people who have been traumatized or are in crisis then you are suffering with them vicariously. Empathy takes a toll. Join us in our conversation with Kimberly West who served for a decade among the most vulnerable of the poor in Nepal and Susan Peters who serves alongside victims of human trafficking as they talk about how they face secondary trauma without loosing hope. 

After 20 years of marriage and ministry in Asia, this beautifully broken bi-cultural couple have an experience of and perspective on ever-increasing nearness to Jesus that will nourish your soul and build your faith. “We should have this expectation-that the journey is difficult,” says Josh with a joy-filled heart and smile on his face (even if you can't see it). Josh and Tsagaanaa have persevered through many BIG-TIME trials together. If you desire to grow closer with your spouse even as you face trials, you dont want to miss this episode. These guys have great wisdom and compassionate hearts to share with you.

“I Have a Work for You to do in Edinburgh”. That word of the Lord, confirmed through a praying saint, launched Tom and Leigh Anne to Scotland 13+ years ago. God’s word was tested by a battle with cancer and a 50% chance of survival prognosis. The testing continued through the first seven years of antagonism and no response to the gospel. But resiliency through persevering faith and daily abiding has led to God-ordained fruit that remains. Pour yourself a "cuppa" and enjoy the Fraley’s warm and inviting way of sharing about their ups and downs, passion for Jesus, and the flock He’s called them to love, build up, and send out over the years.

link to: Brave Mama

In this two-part interview, Cindy, a veteran of over 20 years in Jakarta, Indonesia, shares how finding belonging in her host culture was the foundation of her resilient cross-cultural life.

You know those people who just exude peace as you spend time them? Or wisdom? Or love? Our guest for episode 56 is such a man…on all three accounts! Waco physician Dr. Hess (Previous guest in Episode 52) is with us again, zeroing in this episode on personal disciplinary habits and rhythms that help you maintain holistic health and build resilience while on the field. He shares about establishing and maintaining a rule of life, the value of personal retreats, spiritual direction, growing in self awareness, the value and necessity of being committed to transparency with family and team about your health - physical and/or mental - and more!

Burritt speaks as a physician, husband, father, and someone who’s living very thoughtfully, reflectively, and intentionally as a disciple of Jesus at home, work, and in his community.

Silas' Favorite Advent Song: Oh Come Emmanuel

The Greatest Gift: Unwrapping the Full love Story of Christmas

for Kids: The Star from Afar

for Families: Unwrapping The Greatest Gift: A Family Celebration of Christmas 

Silas' (Waypoint Church) 2014 Advent Reader

Silas' (Waypoint Church) 2016 Advent Reader

Footnotes on Advent by Eric Smith

Sacred Space for Advent and the Christmas Season by the Irish Jesuits

Honest Advent: Awakening to The Wonder of God-With-Us The, Here, and Now by Scott Erickson and Morgan Nichols

Celebrating Abundance by Walter Brueggemann

Lauren, a PhD in Clinical Psychology, took a deep dive into the world of Third Culture Kids/Missionary Kids and and discovered that, in addition to all the wonderful experiences and joys MKs receive from living overseas, they also carry with them a world of complex question marks about identity, transition, misunderstanding, and belonging. Join us in this episode as we ask Lauren how we can have meaningful conversations with the MKs in our lives that help them be even more resilient than they already are. 

Scott and Jenni have been working with people in ministry for 13 years. First in Germany and now in Portugal. They founded The Haven, a refuge for global workers in need of a place of rest. They share with us what they have learned about themselves and through many years of serving those of us in ministry.

Studies show that the level of stress that global workers face during the first years of living overseas due to cultural adaptation is enormously high. In this episode, co-host, Silas West, normalizes that stress and provides some insight into how to overcome our hardwired responses to discomfort and embarrassment in order to adapt quicker and reduce the stress common to the early years of ministry overseas.

Holidays can be difficult. Distance and lack of familiarity can increase the sense of loss. Join Steve and Silas as they talk about facing the holiday season with resilience. 

Jim Marsh is the Dean of Student Health and Wellness, and Executive Director for Counseling Services at Baylor University. We asked Jim to share with us about some of his observations on the decrease in resiliency among incoming college students over the years. Though his work is not with Global Workers, he gives us some language to address areas of lack in Global Worker resiliency as well as helpful interventions that are just as poignant to us as they are to the students at Baylor.

Join us for part 2 with our guest, Steve Brown from the Navigators as he unpacks the nuts of bowls of planning a meaningful sabbatical. He reminds us that rest was blessed and we are invited by God to embrace rest and learn to step aside from productivity as an act of trust. 

Loss and disappointment is a part of life. But it is hard not to get stuck in the emotions of grief. Especially when loss accumulates. Lament helps us turn our grief into praise because it is an appeal to the character and faithfulness of God. Silas shares with us about his experience working with clients as they process loss through lament and helps us face our grief with greater resiliency. 

Clinton and Amber Garsee left Texas to live in southern Thailand because of one thing--they knew they were called. More than two decades later, they share with us how they learned from former missionaries like Amy Carmichael to "count the cost and then take your slate and add up the figures at the foot of the cross." Even as they share about their struggles, they reflect on how it is the cross that gives their suffering the perspective to keep going on. Still in Thailand, it's not the deep roots that they have put down that keep them there, it's because they were called by Jesus and He is worthy of the call. 

Lynette Wilson is a licensed marriage and family counselor in Waco, Texas and a tremendous help to many of our global workers over the years. In this episode Lynette shares with us what anxiety is and gives suggestions on how to discern what the voice of anxiety sounds like. 

"Its never too late for a fresh start". These words still ring in my head whenever I (Silas) am faced with an offense or loss. In 2004, during a sabbatical year from the field, Steve and his wife Mindy invested in our lives personally and through their ministry which is now called Fresh Start For all Nations. It was always my intention to get Steve and Mindy on the podcast. However, sadly Steve passed away last year and embarked on his ultimate Fresh Start. Through their ministry, thousands of men, women and young people continue to find freedom from the effects of offense, hurt, or loss through the transforming power of forgiveness and freedom in Jesus Christ. 

This episode is a little different from our normal format. Instead of an interview, we are sharing a recording of a teaching Steve and Mindy shared in a small group setting. you can find a PDF of the booklet they reference, "Processing The Issues Of Your Heart", on the Fresh Start website.

Learning how to cancel the debts I hold and declare that no one owes me anything because God alone satisfies me has been a key in my own resiliency over the years. It is our hope that you also find this to be a helpful tool in your resiliency toolbox.

Cami was an impoverished latchkey kid growing up in a single parent household. That's where she first encountered Jesus through, of all things, a TV commercial where He invited her to share His heart for vulnerable children in Africa. Christ’s heart of compassion grew from a concern into a calling. Cami joined Word Made Flesh Sierra Leone and has now served in Freetown, the capital of the W. African nation, for 17 years. Cami’s story of sacrificial love and laying hold of Christ’s grace is captivating and a poignant picture of resiliency and grit.

It would be hard to live as a widow in the "Big Chicken" like Martha did for 18 years and not learn a thing or two about spiritual warfare. Martha shares with us how she learned through personal experience to live the things of the Spirit, not just learn about them. She took biblical truth and made it tangible, visualizing God's protection just how it is described in His Word. Martha took what she learned and used it to train leaders in the underground church movement in her country and she joins Resilience today to share what she has learned with us. 

Field-based professional counselor and pastoral care provider, Kyle J., shares about his own journey through depression, how to identify it, and best practices for those struggling with it.

Dave M. and his family serve in the Mediterranean region. He shares with us his keys to resiliency often involve getting to know ourselves and the meaning behind our reactions better. He notes that there are treasures hidden out there-even in the lockdowns and isolation of the global COVID-19 pandemic. What we choose to pay attention to creates the "me" (us) of tomorrow. 

"Tim and Amy" (their real names have been edited out of the podcast for their security and the security of those they labor among) and their children served in one of the most repressive cities under very difficult circumstances. Yet they chose to press on. Why? Listen to this amazing couple share their keys to resiliency; simply how their passion for Jesus kept them and continues to keep them pressing forward. 

Significant loss is "baked into" cross-cultural ministry. Clinical Psychologist, Bob Watson shares with us about the healing power of mourning our losses. When everything in us wants to run away from our feelings of pain and grief, Bob encourages us to embrace them. Like peeling away layers of sickness, mourning our loss helps us become more resilient. With direct application to our current COVID 19 reality, you don't want to miss this episode. 

Michael Sullivant works with the organization, Life Model Works, which resources churches and organizations by combining cutting edge brain-science with spiritual formation to optimize human maturity and transformation into the image of Christ. Not only was our conversation about the intersection of brain science and theology amazingly interesting, Michael gives us some very practical things to help us all on our way of becoming more like Jesus by developing important parts of our minds. 

Life Model Works

Living From The Heart That Jesus Gave You by Jim Wilder et all

Renovated by Jim Wilder

"Gutting it out is not the same as thriving. Learning to meet God in pain instead of feeling I have to gut it out for God is how we honor God, not the other way around (Chris). Join us in part 1 of 2 as we talk with Chris and Rebekah about their journey of becoming stronger in the face of serving God faithfully through military invasions, intifadas, and even imprisonment. 

Clinical Psychologist, Lauren Volpei joins us again for a special episode of Resiliency produced especially for MKs/TCKs. Lauren speaks specifically to MKs about identity, belonging, and the feeling of being misunderstood. 

In this episode, co-hosts Steve Findley and Silas West share their vision behind the upcoming podcast “Resiliency”.

Every family has their how-to secrets; secret recipes, secret fishing holes, secret short-cuts to the gym. In this episode, Steve and Silas are launching a periodically re-occuring series called "Keys to Resiliency" where long term field workers share with us their best kept secrets to making it for the long haul. In this episode, Stephanie shares how a posture of life-long learning has enabled her and her family to thrive on the field. 

Does contemplation always mean sitting in a cave in the woods far from people, devoted to a life of uninterrupted prayer? Apparently not! Steve Findley learns to see contemplation a little differently from Silas West, one of the busier people he knows. 

Today's guests, Tim and Kristi, share with us about how they stay grounded, maintain routines, and build traditions so that they and their family of teenagers can have fun, stay connected and live resiliently in one of the least stable regions of the world. 

Trey Green and Silas have a conversation about the necessity of envisioning our global workers for suffering and the need for a theology of suffering that helps us get past unrealistic expectations that are both personal and cultural in order to thrive in a world where we are promised suffering. 

Waco, TX physician Burritt Hess is no stranger to the world of global missions. Not only is he married to a Third Culture Kid, he has been serving the medical needs of missionaries for decades. In today’s interview, we have a conversation with Burritt about necessary elements of pre-field preparation that make for resilient workers from the unique perspective of an MD.

Andy, Andrea and their four boys have made their home at the inhospitable altitude of 12,000 feet above sea level in El Alto, a town on the outskirts of La Paz, Bolivia. Sacrificing comforts for a calling, they share with us about the choices and the paradigm shifts that have made it possible for them to call this place home. Learn more about the Bakers and their ministry in Bolivia at https://wordmadeflesh.org/bolivia/ and also about their ministry of freedom for women caught in prostitution at https://sutisana.com/

We finish up our interview with Chris and Rebekah where they share how choosing intimacy with Jesus can even make you thankful for prison. Join us in part 2 as we talk with Chris and Rebekah about their journey of becoming stronger in the face of serving God faithfully through military invasions, intifadas, and even imprisonment.

We don't have anything new to share with you about COVID19. But we know you are facing it and wanted to share a word of encouragement to all of our listeners. We are in this together and we will get through it by the grace of God.