Oh, That’s Just My Autism (Melissa Tacia)

I've seen several posts written by autistic people lately wondering about whether or not they should have kids. In this episode I discuss (from my own point of view/parenting experience) some of the things to consider when making the huge decision to venture into parenthood, especially as a neurodivergent person.

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Introductions are awkward...or maybe it’s just me? It might be me. Anyway, my name is Melissa, and I’m here to talk about Autism! Listen to find out a little bit about who I am and why I’m doing this podcast. 

If you enjoy the pod and want more content, or just want to get in touch, find me on IG @oh.thatsjustmyautism or shoot me an email me at ohthatsjustmyautism@gmail.com :-)

How are school and work and life going?? Some parts are going great, other parts are hitting the fan. To sum it up, I'm busy but happy, stressed to the max but finding time for gratitude, and (most importantly) avoiding the break room at all costs. Sometimes self care looks like eating in your car all alone.

One aspect of autism is the fact that we often process emotions differently than others. When it comes to big emotions, like those that come along with the loss of a loved one, it can be even more complex to navigate and sort out, especially with the lack of autism-specific grief resources. I want to thank our guest Beverly for sharing her experience with grief and loss so candidly in an effort to help bring this topic to light and help others.

If you'd like even more content, check out the Patreon page at patreon.com/ohthatsjustmyautism :-)

It’s the holiday season which means there is a LOT going on which also means that I’m drowning in executive dysfunction over here. Anyone else? 

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What is the brain grab? Just listen, you'll totally get it.

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In this episode I discuss Sheldon from The Big Bang Theory and Sam from Atypical, delving into how I relate to these characters deeply in spite of them having a presentation that differs from my own. 

If you enjoy the pod and want more content, or just want to get in touch, find me on IG @oh.thatsjustmyautism or shoot me an email me at ohthatsjustmyautism@gmail.com :-)

My name is Melissa, but people often call me Michelle, or don’t remember me at all. Does anyone else struggle with feeling invisible or unimportant?

If you enjoy the pod and want more content, or just want to get in touch, find me on IG @oh.thatsjustmyautism or shoot me an email me at ohthatsjustmyautism@gmail.com :-)

This episode topic actually came in as a listener request and I thought it was a great idea! So often we can get hung up on the struggles that can come with being on the spectrum that we forget about all the ways that ASD makes us and our lives better. What are your thoughts on this? Do you have some *favorite* ASD traits? Would you change your neurotype if you could? Let me know! 

If you enjoy the pod and want more content, or just want to get in touch, find me on IG @oh.thatsjustmyautism or shoot me an email me at ohthatsjustmyautism@gmail.com :-)

Cyclothymia, or as my son referred to it: diet bipolar disorder - is a mood disorder that is relatively rare, but I wanted to talk about it because (whether I have this or not) the symptoms are very relatable. Mental health issues and diagnoses are important things to discuss, and I’m glad I have this outlet to verbally process all the things I’m questioning.

If you enjoy the pod and want more content, or just want to get in touch, find me on IG @oh.thatsjustmyautism or shoot me an email me at ohthatsjustmyautism@gmail.com :-)

Happy New Year! I have been home recovering from a social engagement in my PJs all day and thinking a bit about the year-gone-by and what's to come. 

I will be speaking at the Neurodivergent Lived Experience Summit this Friday, January 6th. The summit is free to attend and you can register here: https://neurodivergentmagic.com/summit-registration-page/?affiliate=ohthatsjustmyautism

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A little update on my recent trip to London! Lots of fun, new experiences, confusion, and awkwardness.

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Trying to fit myself into a conventional role in society has got me feeling some type of way. Can we agree that the rules on how things are "supposed" to be are dumb? Can I just be my artsy, quirky self and not worry about it?

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Yes, I got my autism diagnosis from a psychologist, but in reality my own self-diagnosis came long before that. I credit Sarah Hendrickx with giving me my biggest "aha" moment. I remember watching her YouTube video "Women & Girls & Autism: What's the Difference?" (linked HERE) with my jaw dropped the entire time because it was SO relatable. Was she talking about me?? The resemblance was uncanny.

When I asked her to be a guest on my pod she accepted and the rest is history. So sit back and listen as I try not to fan-girl over one of my fav autistic women who is doing so many good things in the world of autism through her writing, public speaking, and helping women find their way to diagnosis.

You can find more info about Sarah here: https://www.asperger-training.com/sarah-hendrickx

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My first ever guest is here! The topic we are discussing today is an important one: what happens when your autism self-diagnosis is wrong? Megan opens up about her journey from diagnosing herself as autistic to then realizing that this diagnosis didn't actually fit as well as she thought it did. Even though I don't feel like this situation is super common, it certainly does happen, and I wanted to talk about this side of things because it needs to be highlighted that if you think you're autistic and it turns out that you're not, that's ok! Megan is now one step closer to knowing her true self and moving forward as a neurodivergent, yet not autistic, human.  

Megan has a podcast called The Neurodivergent Magic Podcast. The link to that and information on her coaching services can be found on her website here: https://neurodivergentmagic.com/

Follow Megan on Instagram @neurodivergent_magic or on TikTok @megmoxie - she has some great content!

If you enjoy the pod and want more content, or just want to get in touch, find me on IG @oh.thatsjustmyautism or shoot me an email me at ohthatsjustmyautism@gmail.com :-)

As my diagnosis appointment rapidly approaches, I’m feeling a bit nervous that I’ve got it all wrong. Maybe I’m making this all up? Is this all a big overreaction?? The imposter syndrome is real, y’all.

If you enjoy the pod and want more content, or just want to get in touch, find me on IG @oh.thatsjustmyautism or shoot me an email me at ohthatsjustmyautism@gmail.com :-)

Let’s talk about RSD! This is a condition that often co-occurs with ADHD and Autism and guess what? I think I have it. Here are the links to the 2 articles that I sourced my info from: healthline.com/health/mental-health/rejection-sensitive-dysphoria AND additudemag.com/rejection-sensitive-Dysphoria-and-adhd/ 

If you enjoy the pod and want more content, or just want to get in touch, find me on IG @oh.thatsjustmyautism or shoot me an email me at ohthatsjustmyautism@gmail.com :-)

Wow, what a week! My thoughts and emotions have settled and I feel happy. There’s still a lot to process, but I’m coming to terms with the fact that this could be a lifelong journey, and that’s ok.

If you enjoy the pod and want more content, or just want to get in touch, find me on IG @oh.thatsjustmyautism or shoot me an email me at ohthatsjustmyautism@gmail.com :-)

Going out of town for one night has got me in my usual over-analytical, hyper-planning mode and I’m driving myself crazy. Does this happen to anyone else?? 

If you enjoy the pod and want more content, or just want to get in touch, find me on IG @oh.thatsjustmyautism or shoot me an email me at ohthatsjustmyautism@gmail.com :-)

Two down, one to go! In this episode I give a brief update on my evaluation/diagnosis process. Just two weeks to wait until I get my results!

If you enjoy the pod and want more content, or just want to get in touch, find me on IG @oh.thatsjustmyautism or shoot me an email me at ohthatsjustmyautism@gmail.com :-)

Over the years I've attempted to be so many different versions of myself that I've come to realize I don't really know who I am or what I actually like most of the time. Forcing myself to conform to different ideas of who I *should* be or trying to look a certain way in order to gain (perceived) acceptance has left me lost and confused. I am on a mission to live more authentically, both on the inside and outside, but how? It's so hard to change old patterns of thinking!

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You know I gotta give you all a general life update every once in a while. Starting new jobs, quitting new jobs, starting more new jobs, planning multiple vacations, and surprisingly not getting triggered by my germy microbiology class. Lots to talk about here!

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Why did no one tell me about executive dysfunction earlier?? When you live your whole life struggling with things that are supposed to be “easy”, you start to assume that you’re just broken or incompetent or lazy. Well guess what? You’re not...and neither am I! Executive Dysfunction is a real thing and I’m here to talk about it. 

If you enjoy the pod and want more content, or just want to get in touch, find me on IG @oh.thatsjustmyautism or shoot me an email me at ohthatsjustmyautism@gmail.com :-)

Join me as I talk to George from 'Unpacking Neuroqueerness' as we talk about all the things we wish people knew about autistic meltdowns. Then go follow George's podcast! https://open.spotify.com/show/4q31WLOKRERreD1DQjOOkt?si=c12a96fc5f8a431d

PS. I was on his podcast recently - to hear that episode specifically, go here: https://open.spotify.com/episode/28mlWennssRtHdCH82jx3Q?si=a666e1f2e2ff434f

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I love you all and appreciate your support!

Boundaries are often discussed in terms of relationships with others, but what about learning to set boundaries with yourself? Sometimes we can put more pressure on ourselves than anyone else does. Learning to say no to yourself is just as hard - but just as important - as learning to say no to others.

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My plans got changed last minute this morning and it has really thrown me off! How do I recover from this and have a regular day? Can I? Hellllp. 

If you enjoy the pod and want more content, or just want to get in touch, find me on IG @oh.thatsjustmyautism or shoot me an email me at ohthatsjustmyautism@gmail.com :-)

Today I welcome George from Unpacking Neuroqueerness where we will be discussing the good, the bad, and all the in-between when it comes to the show The Big Bang Theory. George and I are both big fans of the show, and both heavily relate to the Sheldon character, but also realize that there are many problematic aspects when it comes to TBBT. Here we will be breaking it all down and talking about it. Enjoy!

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Do you have a "most embarrassing moment"? When was the last time you felt embarrassed? If you're anything like me, you won't be able to answer these questions because embarrassment really isn't a thing you feel, at least not easily and not often. Is this related to autism, or is it just a "me" thing? I also discuss the first cousins of embarrassment: shame & self-consciousness.

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To quote the great Taylor Swift - I'm just gonna shake it off.

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Listener Stories are here! I want to thank everyone who wrote in - I wish I could have shared all of your stories. It seems like so many of us have battled addiction or have addictive behaviors. This was a very vulnerable topic and I appreciate you all sharing your experiences so candidly.

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There are days where I just don’t feel ok. I’m anxious and irritable and distracted...but I don’t know why! This day is no better or worse than other days, so where is this coming from?? Does this happen to anyone else?? 

If you enjoy the pod and want more content, or just want to get in touch, find me on IG @oh.thatsjustmyautism or shoot me an email me at ohthatsjustmyautism@gmail.com :-)

I recently discovered that I have a type of synesthesia that I didn’t even know existed: Sequence/Space Synesthesia. I talk about this, and also ramble on a bit about how I have a list of my favorite words in my phone and how I like “sharp” letters more than “soft” letters. Does anyone else’s brain work this way?? 

If you enjoy the pod and want more content, or just want to get in touch, find me on IG @oh.thatsjustmyautism or shoot me an email me at ohthatsjustmyautism@gmail.com :-)

Unwanted invitations are a nightmare. My people-pleasing self tries to make me say yes to everything, but I’m at a point where I’m not doing that anymore. But...what do I do instead? Help! 

If you enjoy the pod and want more content, or just want to get in touch, find me on IG @oh.thatsjustmyautism or shoot me an email me at ohthatsjustmyautism@gmail.com :-)

Ever find a person who you are SO into...but not in a romantic way? It feels like a crush without the romance. Yes, platonic crushes are a real thing! I suspect that this is a phenomenon that affects us neurodivergent folk a little more because when we find something (or...someone) interesting, we go all in. And that's ok! (I also take a verbal sidequest and talk about actual crushes and how those are ok too, even if you're in a relationship).

As promised, here is the info for the new "Keeping it Weird" pod: find us on all social platforms at @kiw.podcast

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If you listened to my episode on the DSM, you know my thoughts about it/the diagnostic process. Now it's time to hear from an actual clinician who conducts ASD assessments for adults. Dr. Stai gives some interesting insights into the diagnostic process from a psychotherapists point of view, plus gives some tips for those seeking an assessment. Oh, and I might add, Dr. Stai is neurodivergent herself!

You can find Dr. Stai on Instagram @dr.christina.stai

or Twitter @DoctorStai

If anyone is wanting to connect more on a clinical level or find out more about her practice, here is her website, IG/Facebook handle, and business email address:

https://holisticresourcesclinic.com/

info@holisticresourcesclinic.com

@holisticresourcesclinic (IG and FB)

And here is the ND therapists website she mentioned:

https://ndtherapists.com/

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In this episode I talk about how I first began to suspect that I’m autistic.

If you enjoy the pod and want more content, or just want to get in touch, find me on IG @oh.thatsjustmyautism or shoot me an email me at ohthatsjustmyautism@gmail.com :-)

Coming to you at half-capacity today because my brain kept me up all night thinking about one of my special interests. I love that my brain grabs onto things, but I also wish I could shut it off sometimes! Anyone else? If you enjoy the pod and want more content, or just want to get in touch, find me on IG @oh.thatsjustmyautism or shoot me an email me at ohthatsjustmyautism@gmail.com :-)

Spoiler alert: I LOVE THIS SHOW! That being said, there are a few questions I have pertaining to things that might be problematic. I’m not always the greatest at knowing when I should be offended by something so the question is...should I be? 

If you enjoy the pod and want more content, or just want to get in touch, find me on IG @oh.thatsjustmyautism or shoot me an email me at ohthatsjustmyautism@gmail.com :-)

It is a long held belief that autistic people don’t have empathy. I’m here to tell you, that’s not true. However, empathy (and emotions in general) are something I admittedly struggle with as an autistic person. If you enjoy the pod and want more content, or just want to get in touch, find me on IG @oh.thatsjustmyautism or shoot me an email me at ohthatsjustmyautism@gmail.com :-)

Trigger Warning: Eating Disorders & Emetophobia. There’s a lot to unpack here and this is a particularly sensitive topic for myself and for many others out there, so I hope I’m doing it justice! I am no expert, and by no means speaking for all autistics (as usual), but I wanted to open up about my food struggles since I know eating disorders and autism commonly overlap. I hope some of you can relate and get something out of my story.

If you enjoy the pod and want more content, or just want to get in touch, find me on IG @oh.thatsjustmyautism or shoot me an email me at ohthatsjustmyautism@gmail.com :-)

Discussing the ways I struggle with friendships as an autistic person, including not knowing the social rules, being “ghosted” by people you thought were your friends, and finding most people confusing and exhausting. 

If you enjoy the pod and want more content, or just want to get in touch, find me on IG @oh.thatsjustmyautism or shoot me an email me at ohthatsjustmyautism@gmail.com :-)

I’ve had many many episodes of forgetfulness recently and it’s really frustrating. And inconvenient. And annoying. Can my brain just remember stuff please?! 

If you enjoy the pod and want more content, or just want to get in touch, find me on IG @oh.thatsjustmyautism or shoot me an email me at ohthatsjustmyautism@gmail.com :-)

Fashion is so tricky! Between sensory issues and decision fatigue and societal expectations (especially for women), it’s all too much. Do you feel the same? 

If you enjoy the pod and want more content, or just want to get in touch, find me on IG @oh.thatsjustmyautism or shoot me an email me at ohthatsjustmyautism@gmail.com :-)

It’s alive! I finally made a friendship chart and it’s glorious!

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Follow on IG @oh.thatsjustmyautism or email me at ohthatsjustmyautism@gmail.com.

I’ve been self-employed for 9 years now, but it’s not all rainbows and unicorns! In this episode I weigh the pros and cons of self employment as I ponder a possible return to the workforce in the near future. 

If you enjoy the pod and want more content, or just want to get in touch, find me on IG @oh.thatsjustmyautism or shoot me an email me at ohthatsjustmyautism@gmail.com :-)

When Megan was first on the podcast in October of 2021 (Episode 40) it was to talk about her self-diagnosis journey, and how she thought she was autistic, but then realized she wasn't. But guess what? Plot twist! Megan actually IS autistic! She is back to update us on what has happened since she was last on the show, and to talk about how difficult self-diagnosis can be. We also talk a bit about why self diagnosis is sometimes necessary and how it is totally valid, even when there are some haters out there who think it isn't. Eye roll.

Megan has her own podcast called The Neurodivergent Magic Podcast that is available wherever you listen to podcasts. She is also on IG: @neurodivergent_magic and TikTok: @megmoxie. She has also created some programs for neurodivergent folks that can be found on her website: neurodivergentmagic.com.

I hope you enjoy this update from Megan!

To join our little community of awesome autistics, hit up the Patreon page at patreon.com/ohthatsjustmyautism. If you want to reach out you can email me at ohthatsjustmyautism@gmail.com or find me on IG @oh.thatsjustmyautism.

I need to decide what I’m doing with my life, but how can I do that when in the past I’ve been unable to stick with anything long term? The struggle to sustain interest is REAL. Can you relate? 

If you enjoy the pod and want more content, or just want to get in touch, find me on IG @oh.thatsjustmyautism or shoot me an email me at ohthatsjustmyautism@gmail.com :-)

This was a vulnerable place to record from, guys. Post-meltdown and in a fog, I try to get some thoughts out and process, which is hard to do when your brain is not operating at full capacity. 

If you enjoy the pod and want more content, or just want to get in touch, find me on IG @oh.thatsjustmyautism or shoot me an email me at ohthatsjustmyautism@gmail.com :-)

Today I want to discuss self-diagnosis of Autism vs. obtaining a formal diagnosis, and why I’ve chosen to go with the latter. PS. Both ways are valid! The organization I’m going through for my assessment is a non-profit by the name of GRASP and their website is grasp.org. They offer reasonably priced assessments (compared to others) and they also have a sliding scale fee option for lower income individuals. 

If you enjoy the pod and want more content, or just want to get in touch, find me on IG @oh.thatsjustmyautism or shoot me an email me at ohthatsjustmyautism@gmail.com :-)

I'm stuck. I've fallen and I can't get up. The executive dysfunction black hole is sucking me in and I can't get out. I just want to get stuff done! Send help, friends.

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This episode title may sound controversial, but hear me out. You might end up in agreement that "Autistic Traits" don't actually exist, at least not in the way that we've been made to believe that they do.

Here is the link to the podcast episode where I originally heard someone speak about this idea: https://open.spotify.com/episode/1kAOOJbiqtCDrOTfF0Mo0v?si=kCwZhOYpSQaxSiiWOsRA9Q

I suggest you give it a listen - it's so good!

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Hi! I missed you guys! I went traveling for a week, and I just wanted to update you all on what’s happening in my life. I’ll talk a little bit about missing my routines while traveling, and about how I can find it hard to ask for what I need for fear of seeming selfish or rude. 

If you enjoy the pod and want more content, or just want to get in touch, find me on IG @oh.thatsjustmyautism or shoot me an email me at ohthatsjustmyautism@gmail.com :-)

As my registration date for college approaches, I am reminded that my brain simply can’t make any decisions without massive amounts of analysis, which has made planning my spring semester classes into a very long and tedious process. The struggle is very real over here, guys. If you enjoy the pod and want more content, or just want to get in touch, find me on IG @oh.thatsjustmyautism or shoot me an email me at ohthatsjustmyautism@gmail.com :-)

I've got a very personal, vulnerable, and LGBTQ-centric episode for you today. This week I am talking about my partner coming out as non-binary, and how their transition has changed the way the world perceives us as a couple, and me as a lesbian woman. Being partnered with a male-presenting person has at times felt threatening to my identity, and I have been struggling to figure out how to be ok with that.

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I love a good plot twist, don’t you? Listen to find out what the heck happened during my results appointment!

If you enjoy the pod and want more content, or just want to get in touch, find me on IG @oh.thatsjustmyautism or shoot me an email me at ohthatsjustmyautism@gmail.com :-)

I'm hopping on a plane later this week and that got me thinking about the ups and downs of traveling as an autistic person. Today I'm talking about my experience with travel and what makes the it more (or less) stressful for me personally, and how I cope the most daunting task of all: leaving the comfortable safe bubble of my home for an extended period of time.

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My day started off fine but then a frustrating task derailed me and my brain just couldn’t seem to bounce back. Does this happen to anyone else?? Oh dear brain, just relax and let it go, will ya? 

If you enjoy the pod and want more content, or just want to get in touch, find me on IG @oh.thatsjustmyautism or shoot me an email me at ohthatsjustmyautism@gmail.com :-)

The struggle is real. Will I ever make more friends? What am I doing wrong? Do solutions to this problem even exist? I swear, I'm trying!

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I love you all and appreciate your support!