Counseling Talk — A podcast by 9Marks (9Marks)

Counseling Talk is here!

In this episode, Jonathan Leeman interviews the hosts—Deepak Reju, Hayley Satrom, and Garrett Kell—about the what and why of Counseling Talk. 

The temptation to suicide tricks us that death is better than life.
So how should pastors and members help fellow believers who are struggling with suicidal temptations?

In this episode, Deepak, Garrett, and Hayley start a 3-part series on the weighty topic of suicide.

Helping someone with suicidal thoughts can be overwhelming. How should we develop a care plan for someone struggling with on-going suicidal thoughts?

In this episode of Counseling Talk, Deepak, Garrett, and Hayley offer practical help about caring for suicidal members.

How can Christians best assess the seriousness of someone's suicidal feelings? And how should we walk with those left behind after the suicide of a loved one?

In this episode of Counseling Talk, Deepak, Garrett, and Hayley finish a mini-series on suicide.

Resources

•  Assessment of Suicide by Deepak Reju
•  Funeral Message for L.J. who committed suicide by Pastor Bob Johnson
•  Evaluating a Person with Suicidal Desires by Aaron Sironi and Mike Emlet  JBC vol. 26:2 (2012)
•  I Just Want to Die: Replacing Suicidal Thoughts with Hope by David Powlision (NGP)
•  Grieving a Suicide: Help for the Aftershock by David Powlison (NGP)
•  Counseling Those Impacted by Suicide By Rachel Rosser
•  When A Christian Dies of Suicide by Jeff Forrey
•  Dark Clouds, Deep Mercy by Mark Vroegop

Pastors are not excluded from suffering. When trials come they uniquely become in need of their own pastoral care.

In this episode of Counseling Talk, pastor Garrett Kell shares about trusting God amidst a season of his family’s suffering.

Related Resources: CaringBridge for Eden Kell

When members of the church suffer it provides a unique opportunity to show tangible love.
In this episode of Counseling Talk, Garrett Kell shares with Deepak Reju and Hayley Satrom practical ways of how God’s people loved his family during their season of suffering.


Related Resources: 

• The Kell Story Part 1
• CaringBridge for Eden Kell
• A Do-It-Yourself Marriage Retreat by Deepak Reju
• Heart Song Counseling
• The Center for Biblical Living
• Fieldstone Counseling
• Cross Care Counseling
• Anchored Hope

Christians expect strict confidentiality when speaking of their own sins. But is that good for them?

In this episode of Counseling Talk, Deepak Reju, Hayley Satrom, and Garrett Kell discuss how to shepherd secrets for gospel purposes.


Related resources:

• Discipling by Mark Dever
• Is It Loving to Practice Church Discipline? Jonathan Leeman
• Church Membership by Jonathan Leeman
• You’re a Pastor, Not a Therapist by Jeremy Pierre

Seeing your children to come to faith should be every parent's desire. But what happens when they don't? In this episode of Counseling Talk, Deepak Reju, Hayley Satrom, and Garrett Kell interview Stuart Scott about his new book, Wayward Children: Finding Peace, Keeping Hope.

Related resources:
Wayward Children: Finding Peace, Keeping Hope

In this episode of Counseling Talk, Deepak Reju, Hayley Satrom, and Garrett Kell start a mini-series on pornography and how pastors and members can help one another fight the battle.

Resources for Show 1 - Porn Overview 
David Powlison’s book: Making All Things New: Restoring the Joy to the Sexually Broken
David Powlison’s article: Sexual Sin - The Wider and the Deeper Battle 
Garrett’s book Pure in Heart 


Strategies for Closing Off Access Points
Here are some practical steps to consider as you help an addict to get rid of his access points.   1.  Ask the struggler about every e-device he owns.   
2.  Encourage him or her to get a software monitoring program, such as Covenant Eyes, and put it on all his devices.   
3.  Get rid of standard web browsers and rely on a browser that is carefully monitored.   
4.  Get rid of the applications store. If a new app needs to be downloaded onto a tablet or phone, provide access only temporarily.   
5.  Use special restrictions to cut out the web browser and app store, set time limits, and so on. Make sure the restrictions code is known only to an accountability partner. If the struggler knows it, he or she will remove the restrictions in a moment of weakness and act out.   
6.  Get rid of all apps that have an embedded browser.

What’s the principle behind these six points?
We’re removing control from the believer who struggles with porn and giving it to others because he or she can’t steward the freedom of open access.

What you retreat to for refreshment turns into love. For some Christians, that's pornography. In this episode of Counseling Talk, Deepak Reju, Hayley Satrom, and Garrett Kell share some of the practical tools that can be useful in helping someone fight this difficult battle.

Resources resources

1. 31-Day Devotional on Porn by Deepak Reju
2. Hide & Seek by John Freeman
3. Rescue Skills: Essential Skills for Restoring the Sexually Broken by Jonathan Holmes and Deepak Reju

Reconciliation after confessing a struggle of pornography can be difficult. In this episode of Counseling Talk, Deepak Reju, Hayley Satrom, and Garrett Kell finish up a series on pornography as they lay out principles for godly reconciliation.

Resources for Show 3 - Dating and Marriage 

• Rescue Plan and Rescue Skills by Jonathan Holmes and Deepak Reju
• Redeem Your Marriage: Hope for Husbands Who Have Hurt Through Pornography  by Curtis Solomon
• Reclaim Your Marriage: Grace for Wives Who Have been Hurt by Pornography by Jenny Solomon

In this episode of Counseling Talk, Deepak, Hayley, and Garrett interview Esther Liu about shame and how pastors and counselors can view shame in the light of Scripture and the gospel.

Related Resources

1. Shame Interrupted: How God Lifts the Pain of Worthlessness and Rejection by Ed Welch
2. Shame: Being Known and Loved by Esther Liu

Related resources:

• https://www.heartsongcounseling.org/
• C4 announcement
  • C4 is a group of like-minded Christian counseling centers across the country that are joining together to foster a spirit of mutual edification and encouragement among its members by providing opportunities for care, consultation, content collaboration, and continuing education. If you’re interested in learning more about C4, visit our website.

Anxiety is the spiritual x-ray that God uses to reveal who or what you worship.
In this episode of Counseling Talk, Deepak Reju, Hayley Satrom, and Garrett Kell start the first of three episodes on anxiety.

Related resources

1. John Henderson on anxiety at DRBC
2. Ed Welch's Running Scared and When I'm Afraid

What does the Bible say about anxiety?

Listen to the second episode of a mini-series on anxiety as Deepak Reju, Hayley Satrom, and Garrett Kell discuss.

Related Resource:

1. Help, I don't know where my anxiety is coming from by Mike Emlet and Winston Smith
2. Hope in an Anxious World – Helen Thorne
3. Overcoming Anxiety – David Powlison

How do we fight our anxiety and how we help others fight it?
In this episode of Counseling Talk, Deepak Reju, Hayley Satrom, and Garrett Kell finish the mini-series on anxiety.

Related resources:

• Engaging with God in the Midst of Anxiety by Deepak Reju
• A Small Book on Anxious Heart by Ed Welch
• Anxiety: Knowing God's Peace by Paul Tautges

In this episode of Counseling Talk, Deepak Reju, Garrett Kell, and Hayley Satrom share common mistakes that counselors make and how to avoid them.

Related resources:

• Is It Abuse? by Darby Strickland

In this final episode of Counseling Talk Season 1, Deepak Reju, Hayley Satrom, and Garrett Kell interview John Henderson on how to fight anxiety.

Related resources:

• Running Scared by Ed Welch
• When I'm Afraid by Ed Welch
• A Small Book on Anxious Heart by Ed Welch
• Anxiety: Knowing God's Peace by Paul Tautges
• John Henderson on anxiety at DRBC

Counseling Talk is back for season 2!

In this episode, Garrett, Deepak, and Hayley discuss how to ask good questions in a counseling session. They share personal stories and practical examples that they have seen over the years.

• X-ray Questions: Drawing Out the Whys and Wherefores of Human Behavior by David Powlison
• The Pastor and Counseling by Deepak Reju and Jeremy Pierre
• A Do-It-Yourself Marriage Retreat by Deepak Reju

In this episode of Counseling Talk, Garrett, Deepak, and Hayley begin a 3-part series on adultery and discuss what the Bible says about adultery.

Related resources:

• Envision the End of Your Sin by Garrett Kell
• Help! My Spouse Committed Adultery: First Steps for Dealing with Betrayal by Winston Smith

Subscribe to our new podcast, A Storm in the Desert.

What should counselors do when adultery comes to light?
In this episode of Counseling Talk, Deepak Reju, Garrett Kell, and Hayley Satrom continue their mini-series on adultery.

Related resources:

1. Restoring Your Broken Marriage: Healing After Adultery by Robert Jones
2. After an Affair by Michael Gembola

In this episode of Counseling Talk, Deepak Reju, Garrett Kell, and Hayley Satrom finish their mini-series on adultery, talking about reconciliation after adultery.

Related resources:

• My Spouse Was Unfaithful: Finding Strength in God's Presence by Robert Jones
• Forgiveness by Garrett Kell
• Disclosing Past Sexual Sin in a Dating Relationship by Garrett Kell
• Forgiveness: Reflecting God's Mercy by Hayley Satrom

Subscribe to our new podcast, A Storm in the Desert.

In this episode of Counseling Talk, Deepak, Garrett, and Hayley interview Michael Gembola, the author of After an Affair.

Related resources:

• After an Affair by Michael Gembola