An Evolving Man Podcast (Piers Cross)

AEM Podcast #28 Ulf Sandstrom - Techniques for Healing Trauma

Today I am speaking with Ulf Sandstrom on my podcast. Ulf is a fascinating man who co-founded the charity Peaceful Heart Network which goes to areas of conflict and natural disasters to help heal emotional and mental trauma.

The main tool that they use is the Trauma Tapping Technique which is based on the work of Thought Field Therapy (TFT) and Emotional Freedom Techniques (EFT).

They have worked with 1000s of people and have had transformative results working with child soldiers, victims of rape, violence and orphans of different wars.

Ulf also teaches and leads us through one of the techniques.

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Ulf Sandstrom is a Swedish trauma facilitator, working to ease suffering and prevent violence by spreading methods for trauma relief and resilience to stress. Together with Gunilla Hamne he is a co-founder of the Peaceful Heart Network, a non-profit active in over 30 countries in areas where conflict and natural disasters have left people vulnerable and hyper vigilant. 

They have received the ACEP humanitarian award for their work, developed the Trauma Tapping Technique, conducted studies on the effects of it on children liberated from armed forces in DR Congo, and developed free tools like the app Self Help For Trauma in 27 languages. 

Ulf works with individuals and teams looking to regain control of life and to develop organic self-leadership skills combining Trauma Tapping and with Havening Techniques, Neurolinguistic Programming, hypnosis, Clean Language and Mental Training.

Questions for Ulf:

1. I would love you to share a little more about how you started working in the area you now do as a trauma facilitator?
2. Would you be able to share a little bit about trauma and especially emotional and mental trauma? Why is it so important to heal these traumas? What in your opinion is the impact when trauma is not dealt with?
3. I would love you to share some of your stories of working in war-torn places. Was there a conscious decision to go to Africa in the first place? Or were you asked? 
4. How receptive were people at the beginning when learning the tools like Trauma Tapping Technique? Were there methods that you used to help people to be more receptive to these techniques?
5. What was the impact of using these tools? How long did it take for you and Gunilla to realise that these tools were really helping and having a really positive impact in the communities?
6. Would you be able to share some of the studies you conducted showing how EFT and Tapping and some of the other tools help others? Or some case studies from your own work?
7. Would you be happy to share some of the techniques with us?
8. A lot of my audience are ex-boarders having been sent away from home at a young age. Some have received bullying or other forms of abuse. Having worked with severe trauma what would your message be to someone who has been affected by childhood trauma? In your opinion is it possible to heal?

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Piers is an author and a men's transformational coach and therapist who works mainly with trauma, boarding school issues, addictions and relationship problems.

He also runs online men's groups for ex-boarders, retreats and a podcast called An Evolving Man.

He is also the author of How to Survive and Thrive in Challenging Times. To purchase Piers first book: https://www.amazon.co.uk/How-Survive-Thrive-Challenging-Times/dp/B088T5L251/ref=sr_1_1?dchild=1&keywords=piers+cross&qid=1609869608&sr=8-1

For more videos please visit: http://youtube.com/pierscross

For FB: https://www.facebook.com/pierscrosspublic

For Piers' website and a free training How To Find Peace In Everyday Life: https://www.piers-cross.com/community

Many blessings,

Piers Cross

http://piers-cross.com/

Today I am speaking to the author, Michael Maisey, on my podcast. Michael is an amazing man and has a truly astonishing story. From sexual abuse, violence, drug and alcohol addiction, attempted suicide and being arrested as a teenager for armed robbery and attempted murder Michael spent several years in prison.

On leaving prison Michael continued struggled with alcohol and drug addiction. At age 25 through the support of the AA and the 12 Step Program he gave up alcohol and drugs. He set up a thriving business in real estate and now teaches others through workshops and talks how to transform their lives.

He has been given awards for his work and has appeared as a contestant on Channel Four's show with Ant Middleton, SAS, Who Dares Win, Season 4.

Today we talk about his journey and the tools he has used to transform his life and those of thousands of others. He talks about what it is to be a man, how to transform even the most horrific abuse and how we support the young people who are struggling with crime and addictions.

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Michael is the Author of the Best-Selling Book 'Young Offender'. He has been sober for 14 years and since his release from prison in 2001 he has been on a journey practicing healing and self-development on himself to improve his life and heal the wounds from his own childhood. He went from a child from an underprivileged background, with zero qualifications to being in a position to retire at the age of 35. 

He works with all the tools which he has found to be most beneficial. He brings these tools together to help others reach their full potential and help them to step up and let their own light shine. His core belief is about 100% accountability, giving back, and transforming the lives of others from all walks of life.​

Some questions for Michael:

1. I would love for you to share some of your incredible journey. What was the path that led you to do the work that you now do with men, women and teenagers?
2. Importance of role models: Looking back at your own life, what do you feel is the importance of having benevolent older role models in your life, especially as a teenager? 
3. If your child is struggling:You mention the first time you are arrested the policeman coming to your house. And then the chief superintendent giving you a talking down when you were arrested for armed robbery. Their tactics didn't seem to work for you. What do you feel would have worked for you? And for those who have kids who are getting wayward what is the best way of talking to them?
4. Giving up addictions: How important was the support of the 12-step program and your sponsors of Sean, and Matt. What else could you share about the journey of healing your addictions?
5. What do you feel needs to happen in prison to rehabilitate people? How do we change the current system?
6. How do people find out more about your work?

#michaelmaisey #youngoffender #overcomingaddictions

To find out more about Michael's w

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Piers is an author and a men's transformational coach and therapist who works mainly with trauma, boarding school issues, addictions and relationship problems.

He also runs online men's groups for ex-boarders, retreats and a podcast called An Evolving Man.

He is also the author of How to Survive and Thrive in Challenging Times. To purchase Piers first book: https://www.amazon.co.uk/How-Survive-Thrive-Challenging-Times/dp/B088T5L251/ref=sr_1_1?dchild=1&keywords=piers+cross&qid=1609869608&sr=8-1

For more videos please visit: http://youtube.com/pierscross

For FB: https://www.facebook.com/pierscrosspublic

For Piers' website and a free training How To Find Peace In Everyday Life: https://www.piers-cross.com/community

Many blessings,

Piers Cross

http://piers-cross.com/

 Today I am speaking with Michael Boyle on the 30th episode of my podcast.

Michael is one of the founders of men's work in the UK having been central to inviting over Robert Bly and Robert Moore, author of King Warrior Magician Lover in the 1990s. He was also central to setting up the Mankind Project, MKP in the UK. He was also central to setting up the Mankind Project, MKP in the UK which is a global charity that runs rites of passage weekends. 
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Michael Boyle founded and directed a successful commercial enterprise before making a mid-life transition into the world of myth and archetypal psychology. He has an MA in Psychotherapy and for over 20 years has worked extensively as a facilitator and presenter on corporate leadership programmes throughout the world. He enhances his archetypal work through extensive training and experience in Group Facilitation, Shadow Work and Systemic Constellations. He regards the Archetypal approach as key to stimulating the necessary self-awareness that facilitates sustained behaviour change. Michael is a founding Partner and Senior Programme Director of Olivier Mythodrama and lives in London in the UK.

Michael is also the Founder of Abandofbrothers, a charity providing rites of passage experiences and local male mentors for disaffected young men. He is also a certified Leader and Leader Trainer for the ManKind Project, a global men’s network, and leads “The Adventure,” an initiatory experience for men, internationally. Michael’s most recent project, Breaking the Spell, is specifically designed to support men and women to liberate themselves from restricting personal and cultural conditioning. 

Questions for Michael:

1. I would love for you to share some of your journey – what sparked your mid-life transition into men's work and the Mythopoetic tradition? What have you learned along the way?

2. What are some of your stories and teachings from Robert Bly?
3. I would love for you to speak about rites of passage and initiation. What is the importance of community?
4. I would love for you to speak more about purpose and the archetypes? Would you be able to go into more depth about the power of the archetypal work and the extended framework that you now use?
5. I would love you to speak about Sovereign purpose. What is meant by this? How do we connect with this?
6. I would love for you to talk more about the belief that “people do not so much “grow” as evolve into more fulfilled versions of who they really are.”
7. “The more you develop yourself as a person the more qualified you are for leadership.” Would share some of the wisdom you have learned over the past 30 years about leadership? What some of the key qualities of a great leader? How do we cultivate them? Would you say that our current leaders are in that category? If not, how do we help them or the system to change?
8. What is your vision for the future? How do we go through this rite of passage and come out the other side?

 For the Sovereign Purpose retreat: https://ww

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Piers is an author and a men's transformational coach and therapist who works mainly with trauma, boarding school issues, addictions and relationship problems.

He also runs online men's groups for ex-boarders, retreats and a podcast called An Evolving Man.

He is also the author of How to Survive and Thrive in Challenging Times. To purchase Piers first book: https://www.amazon.co.uk/How-Survive-Thrive-Challenging-Times/dp/B088T5L251/ref=sr_1_1?dchild=1&keywords=piers+cross&qid=1609869608&sr=8-1

For more videos please visit: http://youtube.com/pierscross

For FB: https://www.facebook.com/pierscrosspublic

For Piers' website and a free training How To Find Peace In Everyday Life: https://www.piers-cross.com/community

Many blessings,

Piers Cross

http://piers-cross.com/

Today on the podcast I welcome back Rod Boothroyd to go deeper into the archetype of the Lover. 

The Lover is the part of us that is responsible for feeling, connecting to others, eros and sexuality, creativity and spontaneity. The Lover is the part of us responsible for the emotional and feeling side of our lives. 

Today Rod goes deeper into the subject of the Lover archetype. What are the positive aspects and what are the shadows? How do we connect to this energy in a benevolent way? 

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Rod Boothroyd is a counsellor, psychotherapist, a certified “Healing The Shadow” practitioner and the author of the book Warrior, Magician, Lover, King – a guide to the male archetypes updated for the 21st century. 

He works with men, women and mixed groups to heal the wounds of childhood with Marianne Hill and also trains people in the art of working with the shadow and healing emotional wounds.

Some of the questions that Rod answers are: 

What is the Lover archetype?

1. What makes a balanced and mature Lover?
2. What are the shadows of the archetypes?
3. What are the specific shadows of the Lover archetype?
4. I would love you to speak more about the emotional wounds of the Lover. How does this wound come about and what are some of the self-beliefs that are born from this wound?
5. What would you say is the key emotion of the Lover and why does it help to move through this emotion?
6. In certain areas the Lover seems to be in conflict with the other archetypes. The Lover seems to be about having no boundaries whereas the Warrior is about boundaries. What can we do to integrate the Lover without it taking over our lives and spiralling into addictions?
7. Robert Moore and Douglas Gillette speak of the need of a strong father in puberty to help the adolescent break away from the mother so that he can experience himself “as fully masculine.” In your opinion does this happen at the moment? How do we as men help this to happen so boys can become men?
8. How do we cultivate the Lover - what are the steps that we can take to embody the Lover?
9. How to connect to your work? 

#kingwarriormagicianlover #loverarchetype #rodboothroyd 

Books:

Rod Boothroyd: Warrior Magician Lover King; A Guide to the Male Archetypes Updated for the 21st Century

Josh Waitzkin: The Art of Learning

Bill Kauth: A Circle Of Men; The Original Manual For Men's Groups

Pete Walker: Complex PTSD

Robert Moore: The Archetype of Initiation

John Bradshaw: HomeComing

Philip Shepherd: Radical Wholeness

Paul Gilbert: The Compassionate Mind

Pete Walker: The Tao of Fully Feeling

Training as a shadow work practitioner:

https://www.htsorganisation.co.uk

To contact Rod to learn more about Ed Rooke's Lover Workshops please email: rod@strongfreemen.co.uk 

Group healing and self development work:

Men:

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Piers is an author and a men's transformational coach and therapist who works mainly with trauma, boarding school issues, addictions and relationship problems.

He also runs online men's groups for ex-boarders, retreats and a podcast called An Evolving Man.

He is also the author of How to Survive and Thrive in Challenging Times. To purchase Piers first book: https://www.amazon.co.uk/How-Survive-Thrive-Challenging-Times/dp/B088T5L251/ref=sr_1_1?dchild=1&keywords=piers+cross&qid=1609869608&sr=8-1

For more videos please visit: http://youtube.com/pierscross

For FB: https://www.facebook.com/pierscrosspublic

For Piers' website and a free training How To Find Peace In Everyday Life: https://www.piers-cross.com/community

Many blessings,

Piers Cross

http://piers-cross.com/

Today, I am excited to be speaking to Dawson Church, PhD, who is an award-winning author of the best-selling books, The Genie in Your Genes, Mind to Matter and the Bliss Brain.

We talk about PTSD, and complex PTSD and how it impacts our brains and physiology and what we can start to do to begin the healing process.

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Dawson did undergraduate and graduate work at Baylor University, and obtained his doctorate at Holos University under the supervision of Harvard-trained neurosurgeon Norm Shealey, MD, PhD, founder of the American Holistic Medical Association. 

Dawson founded the National Institute for Integrative Healthcare to study and implement promising evidence-based psychological and medical techniques. His groundbreaking research has been published in many prestigious scientific journals. Dawson is the editor of Energy Psychology: Theory, Research, & Treatment, a peer-reviewed professional journal.

Some of the questions I ask him:

1. I would love for you to share some of your journey. How did you get into the work that you do now?
2. I would love for you to explain some of the research and scientific studies that you have done over the years into trauma and especially PTSD. Would you be able to share what your finding have been? What are some of the most effective tools for healing PTSD?
3. I would love to hear what you feel about Complex PTSD. Due to the nature of residential schools many ex-students feel that they have Complex PTSD or Complex Trauma. Has much research been done into this field? If yes, what have the findings been?
4. I have been practising and working with EFT since 2000. I would love for you to explain how EFT works and why it seems to work so well especially with trauma.
5. In your book, Bliss Brain, you cite Maria Diamond's research into the factors that are important for a healthy brain. What happens to the brain if we grow up in an environment that doesn't have some of the above 5 factors? Can we heal that in later life? How?
6. Happiness: I would love for you to speak about happiness. In these challenging times how do we stay heart-centred and happy?
7. The future – the world seems to be in some chaos at the moment. What is your vision for the future? What can we do to move towards that future vision?

To find out more about Dawson Church please visit: https://dawsongift.com/

To visit his website EFT Universe: https://www.eftuniverse.com/

To get a free copy of his brilliant book, Bliss Brain: https://blissbrain.com/

To download his app Stress Solution: https://play.google.com/store/apps/details?id=com.app.stresssolutionlive

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Piers is an author and a men's transformational coach and therapist who works mainly with trauma, boarding school issues, addictions and relationship problems.

He also runs online men's groups for ex-boarders, retreats and a podcast called An Evolving Man.

He is also the author of How to Survive and Thrive in Challenging Times. To purchase Piers first book: https://www.amazon.co.uk/How-Survive-Thrive-Challenging-Times/dp/B088T5L251/ref=sr_1_1?dchild=1&keywords=piers+cross&qid=1609869608&sr=8-1

For more videos please visit: http://youtube.com/pierscross

For FB: https://www.facebook.com/pierscrosspublic

For Piers' website and a free training How To Find Peace In Everyday Life: https://www.piers-cross.com/community

Many blessings,

Piers Cross

http://piers-cross.com/

Today on the podcast I am delighted to be speaking with Bruce Parry who is the BAFTA award winning producer, director and presenter.

We go behind the scenes of his TV shows, the BBC's Tribe, Artic, and Amazon and Tawai.

A really fascinating journey into what he has learned, his boarding school and military experiences and community.

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Bruce Parry is an English documentarian, indigenous rights advocate, author, explorer, trek leader and former Royal Marines commando officer. 

His documentary series for the BBC entitled Tribe, Amazon, and Arctic have shown him exploring extreme environments, living with remote indigenous peoples and highlighting many of the important issues being faced on the environmental frontline. 

He directed and produced the film Tawai in 2017 which explores the different ways that humans relate to nature and how this influences the way we create our societies. 

Some of the areas he speaks about:

1. The making of his feature film Tawai. 
2. Talking about meeting the Kogi Indians in Columbia and how that helped to bring about a huge change.
3. He talks about renunciation and how he went without drugs, alcohol and sex to help prepare for the film Tawai and the consequences when he broke his renunciation. 
4. What did he learn from the tribal people's of the world to help us at this time while he was filming BBC's Tribe, Amazon and Arctic? 
5. How do we bring the ancient ways into modern society? 
6. He shares some of his own journey at boarding school and the military and the structure of those environments, contrasting with the tribal worlds. 
7. What has he learned about community living? What makes a great community? What doesn't?
8. The importance of doing inner healing work – taking full responsibility for our own healing.
9. The power of listening – how he learned to listen to the tribes he visited
10. He talks about how the indigenous tribes like the Penan and the Mbenjeli have no violence. They see violence and aggression as a mental illness.
11. How competition doesn't exist in the tribes like the Penan. He shares stories of times with the Mbenjeli where he realsed that there was no competition.
12. His vision and words for the future.

To learn more about Bruce Parry's work please visit: https://www.bruceparry.com/about

And to support him on Patreon please visit:

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Piers is an author and a men's transformational coach and therapist who works mainly with trauma, boarding school issues, addictions and relationship problems.

He also runs online men's groups for ex-boarders, retreats and a podcast called An Evolving Man.

He is also the author of How to Survive and Thrive in Challenging Times. To purchase Piers first book: https://www.amazon.co.uk/How-Survive-Thrive-Challenging-Times/dp/B088T5L251/ref=sr_1_1?dchild=1&keywords=piers+cross&qid=1609869608&sr=8-1

For more videos please visit: http://youtube.com/pierscross

For FB: https://www.facebook.com/pierscrosspublic

For Piers' website and a free training How To Find Peace In Everyday Life: https://www.piers-cross.com/community

Many blessings,

Piers Cross

http://piers-cross.com/

Today I am speaking with Tony Gammidge about art therapy and the power of creativity in healing trauma. We also take some time to talk about his own boarding school experiences and the work that he does in prison and secure units.

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Tony Gammidge is an Artist, Filmmaker/Animator, trainer and HCPC registered Art Therapist.

He has a particular interest in stories, and personal narrative and in the idea of embodied storymaking (stories that are made by hand as well as told). This is reflected in his own work, films, artist books and installations but also in his participatory work in prisons, secure units, mental health settings and centres for asylum seekers. 

He has made over 30 films with participants in this time. Many of these films have won Koestler awards and been screened in conferences, symposiums and in galleries and museums.

Questions to ask:

1. I would love to start my interview with a little more about you. What drew you into the work that you now do?
2. Could you talk about art therapy please? I found art and creativity to be so healing in my own therapeutic journey. What is it? How has it helped you and your clients?
3. In working in groups of ex-boarding school men I have seen the transformation that story-telling has on the individual and the group. In your opinion, what is the importance of story-telling? What happens when we tell our stories? And what happens to those who hear us speak or perform our personal journeys?
4. Could you please speak about the idea of ‘home’ or its loss (or ambiguous loss), also in contrast the ‘Hostile environment’ (eg Home Office's attitude to refugees)?
5. Could you also please talk about embodied narrative, stories told through the hands and the body. Could you give an example? How does this process of embodied narrative work?
6. How do our early experiences often shape our careers (for you in prisons and with refugees)?
7. I would love you to speak about your animations and the work that you do in secure units and prisons. Would you be able to share a little about Norton Grim? Where did this character come from and how did making the film about him feel?
8. What were your experiences of boarding school like?
9. Could you share some of the healing that has happened in these environments as people have had permission to share their stories?
10. How do people find out more about you?

#tonygammidge #arttherapy #traumaarttherapy

For more information about Tony and the work he does please visit: https://www.tonygammidge.com/

He mentions an interview with Dr Pauline Boss on Ambiguous Loss on the ‘On Being’ website:

https://onbeing.org/programs/pauline-boss-navigating-loss-without-closure/

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Piers is an author and a men's transformational coach and therapist who works mainly with trauma, boarding school issues, addictions and relationship problems.

He also runs online men's groups for ex-boarders, retreats and a podcast called An Evolving Man.

He is also the author of How to Survive and Thrive in Challenging Times. To purchase Piers first book: https://www.amazon.co.uk/How-Survive-Thrive-Challenging-Times/dp/B088T5L251/ref=sr_1_1?dchild=1&keywords=piers+cross&qid=1609869608&sr=8-1

For more videos please visit: http://youtube.com/pierscross

For FB: https://www.facebook.com/pierscrosspublic

For Piers' website and a free training How To Find Peace In Everyday Life: https://www.piers-cross.com/community

Many blessings,

Piers Cross

http://piers-cross.com/

Carl Chambers is a Church of England Vicar at St. Michael & All Angels Church in Wilmington, Kent. He is passionate about giving voice and shining light on issues in the church.

Today I am excited to be talking to Carl Chambers about the church. As a Vicar for the Church of England today he brings light and hope to the conversation about the church sexual abuse and for the need for truth and reconciliation. 

A really powerful conversation with a very courageous man. I spent several months looking for someone to speak up about the church and found it very difficult to find anyone. 

Carl was a real pleasure to speak to with so much wisdom and how we can move forward. It is time for us to share our stories and be heard... ---- 

Some of the questions for Carl:

1. I would love for you to share some of your journey in getting to where you are now. What led you into the church?
2. I notice within the church that there has been a lot of cover up over different issues like safeguarding and abuse. Why do you feel this is the case?
3. How do we start to shine light into these issues and bring healing to those who have been affected by some of these wrongdoings in the church?
4. Is there any light that you can shine and speak about? What is it that we are not talking about?
5. I know that you attended boarding school from a young age. What was the impact for you of going to board at such a young age?
6. Bullying. Why is bullying so latent in some boarding schools? How does it crush people? Again, what can we do to start to bring healing to what went on in these schools?
7. What changed your mind about your boarding school experiences? You left as head boy and thought that you loved it. 
8. What is your analogy regarding the church and the abuse?
9. What is your vision moving forward? How do we bring healing to these institutions?

#churchabuse #boardingschoolabuse #reconciliation

For more information about the work that Carl does please visit: https://www.stmichaelswilmington.org.uk/home.htm

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Piers is an author and a men's transformational coach and therapist who works mainly with trauma, boarding school issues, addictions and relationship problems.

He also runs online men's groups for ex-boarders, retreats and a podcast called An Evolving Man.

He is also the author of How to Survive and Thrive in Challenging Times. To purchase Piers first book: https://www.amazon.co.uk/How-Survive-Thrive-Challenging-Times/dp/B088T5L251/ref=sr_1_1?dchild=1&keywords=piers+cross&qid=1609869608&sr=8-1

For more videos please visit: http://youtube.com/pierscross

For FB: https://www.facebook.com/pierscrosspublic

For Piers' website and a free training How To Find Peace In Everyday Life: https://www.piers-cross.com/community

Many blessings,

Piers Cross

http://piers-cross.com/

An Evolving Man Podcast (AEM) #36: Dr Suzanne Zeedyk: Developmental Psychologist: Attachment Theory, ACEs, Trauma, Boarding School Syndrome 

Today I am delighted to be speaking Dr Suzanne Zeedyk. In this episode of An Evolving Man Podcast we explore attachment theory, ACEs (Adverse Childhood Experiences), Trauma and boarding school.

Suzanne explores what trauma and attachment theory is. And then she goes in to exploring how this relates in the world of boarding school and boarding school syndrome.

A really fascinating discussion from one of the world's leading developmental psychologists who has shared a stage with Gabor Mate among other people.

We cover lots of areas from Early Years Framework, the effect of Covid and lockdowns on children and how boarding school effects our leaders developmentally.

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Dr. Suzanne Zeedyk is a research scientist fascinated by babies’ innate capacity to connect.  Since 1993, she has been based at the University of Dundee (Scotland), within the School of Psychology.  Her academic career began in the USA, where she completed her PhD at Yale University. 

Suzanne’s core aspiration continues to be strengthening awareness of the decisions we take about caring for our children — because those choices are integrally connected to our vision for the kind of society we wish to build. 

Questions for Suzanne:

1. Tell us about your background and how you became interested in this topic. 
2. Tell us about the rise of the Trauma Movement (which some people call the ACEs Movement)– here in the UK & beyond. 
3. Give us a sense of how trauma works. Why does it leave such impact? 
4. ***You think Boarding School Trauma has been left out of the Trauma Movement? And you think there needs to be a change in that? Tell us more. 
5. Why do you think that separation/exclusion exists? 
6. What are the consequences of legitimising suffering of Boarding School Children?
7. What questions does my stance leave us with? 
8. Is healing from boarding school trauma possible? 
9. How do people learn more about the work that you do?

#childdevelopment #boardingschools #attachment theory

For more information about Suzanne please visit: https://suzannezeedyk.com/

Or: https://connectedbaby.net

For her Facebook page: https://www.facebook.com/drsuzannezeedyk/

To follow her on Twitter: https://twitter.com/suzannezeedyk

Suzanne's book: Tigers and Teddies: https://www.amazon.co.uk/Sabre-Tooth-Tigers-Teddy-Bears-ebook/dp/B0874TNWFY/ref=sr_1_2?keywords=suzanne+zeedyk&qid=1652369012&sprefix=suzanne+zee%2Caps%2C117&sr=8-2

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Trail

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Piers is an author and a men's transformational coach and therapist who works mainly with trauma, boarding school issues, addictions and relationship problems.

He also runs online men's groups for ex-boarders, retreats and a podcast called An Evolving Man.

He is also the author of How to Survive and Thrive in Challenging Times. To purchase Piers first book: https://www.amazon.co.uk/How-Survive-Thrive-Challenging-Times/dp/B088T5L251/ref=sr_1_1?dchild=1&keywords=piers+cross&qid=1609869608&sr=8-1

For more videos please visit: http://youtube.com/pierscross

For FB: https://www.facebook.com/pierscrosspublic

For Piers' website and a free training How To Find Peace In Everyday Life: https://www.piers-cross.com/community

Many blessings,

Piers Cross

http://piers-cross.com/

Today on the podcast I welcome back Rod Boothroyd for the final part in the series where we 
explore the archetype of the King or the Queen also known as the Sovereign Archetype. 

The King or Sovereign is the part of us that is responsible for vision, power,  leadership, potency, blessing ourselves and others, and bringing order to our internal and external worlds. The King is also the part of us responsible for the spiritual side of our lives. 

Today Rod goes deeper into the subject of the King archetype. What are the positive aspects and  what are the shadows? How do we connect to this energy in a benevolent way? 
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Rod Boothroyd is a counsellor, psychotherapist, a certified “Healing The Shadow” practitioner and the author of the book Warrior, Magician, Lover, King – a guide to the male archetypes updated for the 21st century. 

He works with men, women and mixed groups to heal the wounds of childhood with Marianne Hill and also trains people in the art of working with the shadow and healing emotional wounds.
 
Some of the questions that Rod answers are: 
1. What is the King or Sovereign archetype?
2. What makes a balanced and mature King?
3. What are the shadows of the archetypes?
4. What are the specific shadows of the King archetype?
5. I would love you to speak more about the emotional wounds of the King. How does this 
wound come about and what are some of the self-beliefs that are born from this wound?
6. What would you say is the key emotion of the King and why is this emotion so important 
for a mature male?
7. In your book you mention that you feel that the King archetype is the one which is most out 
of balance in the modern man. Why is this? Has it changed over the past few decades since 
Robert Moore and Douglas Gillette published their books? 
8. How do we cultivate the King - what are the steps that we can take to embody the King 
more fully in our lives?
9. You mention that the King is about life purpose and mission. Can you talk a little more to us
about how to connect to our mission and purpose as men and women?
10. How to connect to your work? 

#kingwarriormagicianlover #kingarchetype #rodboothroyd 

Books:
Rod Boothroyd: Warrior Magician Lover King; A Guide to the Male Archetypes Updated for the 
21st Century
Josh Waitzkin: The Art of Learning
Bill Kauth: A Circle Of Men; The Original Manual For Men's Groups
Pete Walker: Complex PTSD
Robert Moore: The Archetype of Initiation
John Bradshaw: HomeComing
Philip Shepherd: Radical Wholeness
Paul Gilbert: The Compassionate Mind
Pete Walker: The Tao of Fully Feeling 

Training as a shadow work practitioner:
https://www.htsorganisation.co.uk 

To contact Rod to learn more about Ed Rooke's Lover Workshops please email: 
rod@strongfreemen.co.uk 

Group healing and self development work:
Men:
https://www.strongfreemen.co.uk
https://www.menwithoutmasks.com
https://www.th

---

Piers is an author and a men's transformational coach and therapist who works mainly with trauma, boarding school issues, addictions and relationship problems.

He also runs online men's groups for ex-boarders, retreats and a podcast called An Evolving Man.

He is also the author of How to Survive and Thrive in Challenging Times. To purchase Piers first book: https://www.amazon.co.uk/How-Survive-Thrive-Challenging-Times/dp/B088T5L251/ref=sr_1_1?dchild=1&keywords=piers+cross&qid=1609869608&sr=8-1

For more videos please visit: http://youtube.com/pierscross

For FB: https://www.facebook.com/pierscrosspublic

For Piers' website and a free training How To Find Peace In Everyday Life: https://www.piers-cross.com/community

Many blessings,

Piers Cross

http://piers-cross.com/

Today on the podcast I am excited to be speaking to Dillibe Onyeama. Dillibe was the first black boy to graduate from Eton and wrote about his account of boarding school in the 1972 book which was originally called, Nigger At Eton. 

Dillibe suffered a lot of racial abuse while at the school. Today he shares some of his experiences at school and talks in more depth about what happened around the time of the publication of the book. He talks about how the powers that be tried to stop the book being published.

The Nigerian author goes on to talk about fagging, some of the good things about the school and some of his opinions about slavery and how there needs to be some form of restitution.

A truly fascinating conversation!

---

AEM Podcast #38 Dillibe Onyeama – Racial Abuse At Boarding School & Eton, Black Boy At Eton

PLEASE NOTE: The recording does cut out in places due to our connection. I have left it in so that no part of the interview is missed.

---

Dillibe Onyeama is a Nigerian author, and publisher. Dillibe was the first Black boy to ever graduate from Eton College, and only the second to join when he started in 1965. In 1972, aged just 21 he wrote about his experiences of Eton. The book is a deeply personal account of the racism he endured during his times as a student at the world-famous institution. He has written 28 books published in 4 countries.

Here are some of the questions that he answers.

I would be really interested to hear you share some of your journey at Eton? How was it for you?

1. What was the difference for you between your experience of your prep school, Grove Park, and Eton? Were they the same or vastly different?
2. How did you manage to cope with the racism that was meted out to you at Eton?
3. I was fascinated to read about your experiences with the South Africans. “I wondered also why I had had more common decency shown to me by these two South Africans than by almost any other white boy at Eton.”(P.144) Would you be able to share some of what happened?
4. You mention that, “When I encountered racist abuse in some division... I was thus unable to fully concentrate on the teaching.”(P.119) Do you feel that the bullying impacted your ability to study at the school?
5. What happened after you published your book in 1972? How did you respond to the school?
6. What were some of the good things about Eton?
7. I felt really sad reading your story of the hallucinations and violence. I could relate to it having had similar attacks myself later in life. How did you learn to deal with these hallucinations? When you asked for support – was it helpful?
8. Blackett- Ord (P.225). What impact did this house captain have on the rest of the school in abolishing fagging, beating and fining students by the prefects?
9. How has time changed your impressions of what happened at Eton? How do you feel about your experiences now? Do you feel, looking from afar that Eton appears to have changed?
10. Anything else that

---

Piers is an author and a men's transformational coach and therapist who works mainly with trauma, boarding school issues, addictions and relationship problems.

He also runs online men's groups for ex-boarders, retreats and a podcast called An Evolving Man.

He is also the author of How to Survive and Thrive in Challenging Times. To purchase Piers first book: https://www.amazon.co.uk/How-Survive-Thrive-Challenging-Times/dp/B088T5L251/ref=sr_1_1?dchild=1&keywords=piers+cross&qid=1609869608&sr=8-1

For more videos please visit: http://youtube.com/pierscross

For FB: https://www.facebook.com/pierscrosspublic

For Piers' website and a free training How To Find Peace In Everyday Life: https://www.piers-cross.com/community

Many blessings,

Piers Cross

http://piers-cross.com/

Bill Kauth is the co-founder of the Mankind Project (MKP) and the New Warrior Training Adventure (NWTA). The NWTA has now served over 75,000 men and has 47 centers in 12 countries around the world. 

In 1992 St. Martin’s Press published his book A Circle of Men: The Original Manual for Men’s Support Groups (reissued in 2015). As a social inventor over the last two decades, Bill also co-founded the Inner King Training and in 1995 launched the Warrior-Monk Training Retreat. 

In his role as “Visionary-at-large” with the MKP, Bill studies the state of the world seeing the need for local tribes and fraternal lodges.

---

Today on the podcast it is a real pleasure to be speaking with Bill Kauth. What a great conversation and a great man. 

Bill is the founder of the Mankind Project which is one of the world's leading men's charities helping men to live their mission in the world and to support their emotional and mental health.

Some of the questions and topics we talk about:

1. I would love you to begin by sharing some of your journey. What inspired you to begin the New Warrior Training Adventure?
2. I would love you to talk about the importance of mission and purpose, especially for men?
3. In your opinon having been involved in communities for many decades what are some of the key characteristics of a benevolent and thriving community?
4. What in your opinion is the reason for men's groups and men's initations? Do you have any advice about how to set up a thriving men's group?
5. You talk in your book about the need for us as a collective to demand our political leaders live in integrity. How do we go about that?
6. I would love you to speak about integrity in a man's life. How important is this? How can we as men support each other to stay in integrity?
7. Play. Often men's work is really serious. I love how you talk about in your book about play and the need to bring play into men's work. Can you speak to that please?
8. Conflict management. I see quite a bit of conflict in the world. In your experience what is the best way of approaching conflict? How do we move through it and become stronger?
9. The missing fathers and shame. Ritual and ceremony. Your father and the NWTA. Robert Bly, “We can only learn about manhood from other men.”
10. In your book you talk about Helen Caldicott and her work in bringing awareness to the current challenges with the environment. As as elder what do you feel we need to do individually today to create a thriving future?
11. How do people reach out to you?

To buy his book in the US: https://www.amazon.com/Bill-Kauth/e/B001KDEROQ?ref=sr_ntt_srch_lnk_1&qid=1655121686&sr=8-1

To buy his books in the UK: https://www.amazon.co.uk/Bill-Kauth/e/B001KDEROQ?ref=sr_ntt_srch_lnk_1&qid=165512166

---

Piers is an author and a men's transformational coach and therapist who works mainly with trauma, boarding school issues, addictions and relationship problems.

He also runs online men's groups for ex-boarders, retreats and a podcast called An Evolving Man.

He is also the author of How to Survive and Thrive in Challenging Times. To purchase Piers first book: https://www.amazon.co.uk/How-Survive-Thrive-Challenging-Times/dp/B088T5L251/ref=sr_1_1?dchild=1&keywords=piers+cross&qid=1609869608&sr=8-1

For more videos please visit: http://youtube.com/pierscross

For FB: https://www.facebook.com/pierscrosspublic

For Piers' website and a free training How To Find Peace In Everyday Life: https://www.piers-cross.com/community

Many blessings,

Piers Cross

http://piers-cross.com/

What is the female experience of boarding school? Often we talk about the boarding school experience of boys and how it impacts men. But often the subject of how boarding school impacts a girl and then a women later on in life is not spoken about.

Today I am excited to be speaking with two leading women in the field of working with women ex-boarders and bringing this subject to light.

What it is like for a girl? How is it different from boys? What are some of the nuances and differences that make boarding school as impactful on women as it is on men?

---

Karen Macmillan counsels adults around a wide range of issues, with a specialism in working with boarding school survivors. She runs CPD workshops for therapists in working with ex boarders with her colleague Sara Warner. 

Sara Warner is a BACP registered counsellor and Internal Family Systems Therapist specialising in working with boarding school survivors in private practice in Lewes seeing local, national, and international clients. 

Some of the topics and questions we talk about:

1. Introductions
2. How did the idea of doing a workshop specifically about working with women ex boarders come about?
3. Are there particular themes specific to women ex boarders’ experience? 
4. Patriarchy affects women differently to men and both are affected intensely by being in a boarding school – can you say more about this
5. Can you talk a bit about internalised misogyny.
6. Some of the other areas we talk about:
   1. Eating disorders like anorexia, and bulimia
   2. The problems with eating that carry on into later life
   3. How jealousy and envy can still impact women post school.
   4. The main wound being around the breaking of attachments
   5. Self-harming
   6. The denial of the body and especially sexuality in boarding schools
7. What have you discovered in your work with women?
8. How do people find out more about your work?

For more information about their work please visit: https://www.counselling-hove.com/my-approach

https://counsellinginlewes.com/

For their workshop online for therapists on October 15th: https://www.eventbrite.co.uk/e/working-with-women-boarding-school-survivors-a-workshop-for-therapists-tickets-305922050087

For the workshop for women ex-boarders run by boarding survivors https://www.boardingschoolsurvivors.co.uk/events-and-workshops/  

And for a workshop for male and female ex-boarders: https://www.theboardingschooltherapist.com/boardingschoolawarenesscourse

---

Piers is an author and a men's transformational coach and therapist who works mainly with trauma, boarding school issues, addictions and relationship problems.

He also runs online men's groups for ex-boarders, retreats and a podcast called An Evolving Man.

He is also the author of How to Survive and Thrive in Challenging Times. To purchase Piers first book: https://www.amazon.co.uk/How-Survive-Thrive-Challenging-Times/dp/B088T5L251/ref=sr_1_1?dchild=1&keywords=piers+cross&qid=1609869608&sr=8-1

For more videos please visit: http://youtube.com/pierscross

For FB: https://www.facebook.com/pierscrosspublic

For Piers' website and a free training How To Find Peace In Everyday Life: https://www.piers-cross.com/community

Many blessings,

Piers Cross

http://piers-cross.com/

This episode hears from one of the US's leading paediatrician's Dr Claudia M Gold. Here she speaks about attachment theory, the power of discord – the importance of having ups and downs in relationships and how that links in to childhood trauma and especially boarding school syndrome.

Some of the areas we talk about are containment, the power of being heard, rupture and mismatch and uncertainty as they relate to relationships. We also talk about Prince Harry and how his experiences of boarding school and the death of his mother Princess Diana. 

---
Claudia M. Gold, MD is a pediatrician and writer who practiced general and behavioral pediatrics for over 20 years and now specializes in early childhood mental health. 

She is on the faculty of the U-Mass Chan Medical School Early Relational Fellowship, the Brazelton Institute at Boston Children’s Hospital, and the Berkshire Psychoanalytic Institute. 

She is a clinician with Volunteers in Medicine, Berkshires and director of the Hello It’s Me Project, a community-based program supporting parent-infant relationships in high-need low resourced communities. 

Dr. Gold speaks frequently to a variety of audiences including parents and professionals. 

Some of the questions/ areas for conversation:

1. I would love you to share some of your journey. How did you arrive at where you are now?
2. I would love to hear you speak about the power of being heard & feeling heard.
3. Could you explain what containment is – Winnicott, etc?
4. I would be really interested in hearing you speak about the power of very early interactions.  One of the discussions going on in the boarding school literature over here is whether the ‘attachment break’ that has been seen as occurring at the point at which a child is ‘sent away’ to boarding school (at 6 or 7 or 8 or 11 years old) is the key ‘break’ – or whether we should be looking earlier.  If you are a child born into a family that ‘belongs’ to a culture/class that EXPECTS to send you away (and which may well hire a nanny for your early care), what are the impacts of being born into such a parenting culture/class?  How does this change the way they expect (and do) interact with you?  What happens when you layer a schooling ‘attachment break’ on top of that, as opposed to the ‘break’ coming as a scholarship or other unexpected ‘opportunity’?  
5. Boarding School experiences are full of unrepaired ruptures.  I would love to hear you speak about the impact of those.
6. Leading on from question 4, I would love you to speak to what age it is appropriate for a child to be separated from their parents. And is there a healthy way of doing this? What are the impacts on an adult who has been through this rupture? Are there certain symptoms?
7. Discord P.31 – What happens if there is discord in a relationship but it is never healed? E.g. a child is sent away to board and never has a chance to speak up or heal the rupture?
8. Certainty P.226 – I love what you say about certainty and how it “leads us away

---

Piers is an author and a men's transformational coach and therapist who works mainly with trauma, boarding school issues, addictions and relationship problems.

He also runs online men's groups for ex-boarders, retreats and a podcast called An Evolving Man.

He is also the author of How to Survive and Thrive in Challenging Times. To purchase Piers first book: https://www.amazon.co.uk/How-Survive-Thrive-Challenging-Times/dp/B088T5L251/ref=sr_1_1?dchild=1&keywords=piers+cross&qid=1609869608&sr=8-1

For more videos please visit: http://youtube.com/pierscross

For FB: https://www.facebook.com/pierscrosspublic

For Piers' website and a free training How To Find Peace In Everyday Life: https://www.piers-cross.com/community

Many blessings,

Piers Cross

http://piers-cross.com/

In this episode we talk about surviving the future. What is happening in the world regarding climate change, the economy and environmental issues? My guest today is someone who has been involved in the highest levels of decision making regarding UK environmental policy. He shares some very uncomfortable truths. Are we on the brink of collapse? Is there anything we can do about it?

---

Shaun Chamberlin has been involved with the Transition Network since its inception, cofounding Transition Town Kingston and authoring the movement's second book, The Transition Timeline. 

He is managing director of the Fleming Policy Centre and former chair of the Ecological Land Co-operative, and has spoken at venues ranging from Occupy camps to Parliaments.

In exploring the cultural narratives charting society's course he has written for or edited a diverse range of books, magazines, academic journals, and other publications, including co-authoring a significant UK All Party Parliamentary report with his close friend and regular collaborator David Fleming. His website is www.darkoptimism.org. 

Subjects that I ask Shaun:

1. I would love for you to share some of your path to how you now do what you do?
2. “We are unshamedly positive about what kind of a world humanity could create, and unashamedly realistic about how far we are from creating it today.”
3. David Fleming – A Dictionary for the Future and How We Survive it
4. Economic collapse
5. We need to keep hope alive.
6. Grief – the annilation of life on earth – living in a dying world – headed into the collapse scenario
7. I want to tell a story with life that I am extremely proud to tell.
8. Feeling alone with the apocalypse – find a peer group – find other people who care – resilience.org
9. “Do nothing that matters without consulting a conversation” DF
10. What is necessary, that we might have a future?
11. The key to a better future lies not in jobs, growth and mathematics, but in culture, community and conviviality. 
12. Community resilience
13. Where are we headed?
14. What can we do? The middle ground...

#climatecrisis #economicalcollapse #survivingthefuture

For more information about Shaun's work please visit: https://www.darkoptimism.org

For access to the Lean Logic online dictionary: https://leanlogic.online/

For access to Shaun's course Surviving the Future at Vermont College: https://www.ce.sterlingcollege.edu/surviving-the-future

Find him on Twitter at @darkoptimism 

In this episode we talk about surviving the future. What is happening in the world regarding climate change, the economy and environmental issues? My guest today is someone who has been involved in the highest levels of decision making regarding UK environmental policy. He shares some very uncomfortable truths. Are we on the brink of collapse? Is there anything we can

---

Piers is an author and a men's transformational coach and therapist who works mainly with trauma, boarding school issues, addictions and relationship problems.

He also runs online men's groups for ex-boarders, retreats and a podcast called An Evolving Man.

He is also the author of How to Survive and Thrive in Challenging Times. To purchase Piers first book: https://www.amazon.co.uk/How-Survive-Thrive-Challenging-Times/dp/B088T5L251/ref=sr_1_1?dchild=1&keywords=piers+cross&qid=1609869608&sr=8-1

For more videos please visit: http://youtube.com/pierscross

For FB: https://www.facebook.com/pierscrosspublic

For Piers' website and a free training How To Find Peace In Everyday Life: https://www.piers-cross.com/community

Many blessings,

Piers Cross

http://piers-cross.com/

Part 2: In this episode we talk about surviving the future. What is happening in the world regarding climate change, the economy and environmental issues? My guest today is someone who has been involved in the highest levels of decision making regarding UK environmental policy. He shares some very uncomfortable truths. Are we on the brink of collapse? Is there anything we can do about it?

---

Shaun Chamberlin has been involved with the Transition Network since its inception, cofounding Transition Town Kingston and authoring the movement's second book, The Transition Timeline. 

He is managing director of the Fleming Policy Centre and former chair of the Ecological Land Co-operative, and has spoken at venues ranging from Occupy camps to Parliaments.

In exploring the cultural narratives charting society's course he has written for or edited a diverse range of books, magazines, academic journals, and other publications, including co-authoring a significant UK All Party Parliamentary report with his close friend and regular collaborator David Fleming. His website is www.darkoptimism.org. 

Subjects that I ask Shaun:

1. I would love for you to share some of your path to how you now do what you do?
2. “We are unshamedly positive about what kind of a world humanity could create, and unashamedly realistic about how far we are from creating it today.”
3. David Fleming – A Dictionary for the Future and How We Survive it
4. Economic collapse
5. We need to keep hope alive.
6. Grief – the annilation of life on earth – living in a dying world – headed into the collapse scenario
7. I want to tell a story with life that I am extremely proud to tell.
8. Feeling alone with the apocalypse – find a peer group – find other people who care – resilience.org
9. “Do nothing that matters without consulting a conversation” DF
10. What is necessary, that we might have a future?
11. The key to a better future lies not in jobs, growth and mathematics, but in culture, community and conviviality. 
12. Community resilience
13. Where are we headed?
14. What can we do? The middle ground...

#climatechange #economicalcollapse #survivingthefuture

For more information about Shaun's work please visit: https://www.darkoptimism.org

For access to the Lean Logic online dictionary: https://leanlogic.online/

For access to Shaun's course Surviving the Future at Vermont College: https://www.ce.sterlingcollege.edu/surviving-the-future

Find him on Twitter at @darkoptimism 

---

Piers is an author and a men's transformational coach and therapist who works mainly with trauma, boarding school issues, addictions and relationship problems.

He also runs online men's groups for ex-boarders, retreats and a podcast called An Evolving Man.

He is also the author of How to Survive and Thrive in Challenging Times. To purchase Piers first book: https://www.amazon.co.uk/How-Survive-Thrive-Challenging-Times/dp/B088T5L251/ref=sr_1_1?dchild=1&keywords=piers+cross&qid=1609869608&sr=8-1

For more videos please visit: http://youtube.com/pierscross

For FB: https://www.facebook.com/pierscrosspublic

For Piers' website and a free training How To Find Peace In Everyday Life: https://www.piers-cross.com/community

Many blessings,

Piers Cross

http://piers-cross.com/

Lessons from The Jungles of Borneo – The Importance of Reconnecting with Nature & Healing The Planet - AEM #43 – Kevin Albin 

Today I am very happy to be speaking to Kevin Albin about his experiences of living for 6 months in the jungles of Borneo and his work now as a climate activist. 

What did he learn during that time in the jungles as a trek leader and the importance of connecting to nature?

How have we as humanity lost that connection? And how does that relate to what is happening in the world with climate change?

A fascinating discussion with a really lovely man. We talk about fossil fuels, wounded leaders, trauma, his boarding school experiences, and his time working with teenagers. He also discusses his book, Stonechild.

---

Kevin Albin served 25 years with the police in the UK, eight years of which were with a tactical firearms team, and as a negotiator. In 2002, he retrained as an International Mountain Leader (BAIML) working across the globe guiding on mountaineering trips and expeditions. 

He is an author of the book, Stonechild, a fictional story about seeing the need for conservation and a change to the way we act with the environment. In 2011, he won Bronze in the Wanderlust Magazine World Guide Awards for his work.

His hope is that his writing will continue to spread the word on conservation and protection of all species.

Questions and areas to speak about:

1. I would love you to share some of your journey. How did you get to where you are now?
2. I would love for you to share a little about what you have learned about the environment and how we can conserve the planet moving forward.
3. Other areas to talk about:
   1. Stonechild – how did this come about and what is the message?
   2. Working with teenagers in the trekking; work that you have done – rubbing shoulders with nature.
   3. What do you feel is the pressure that teenagers are under at the moment
   4. Experiences of boarding school – controlled by the bell – trying to escape – how did your parents find it was for them you going away?
   5. What can we do to start to positively change the environment? 
   6. Leaders – are the leaders you have spoken with interested in changing? 
   7. Trauma and leaders
   8. Leaders – they can be the heroes of this moment.
   9. Are companies changing their environmental policies? 
   10. The manipulation of the fossil fuel industries

#fossilfuels #stonechild #climatechange #conservation

For more information about Kevin please do visit: https://kevin-albin.com/

To buy Kevin's book please visit: https://www.amazon.co.uk/Stonechild-Kevin-Albin/dp/B08D53GZTC/ref=sr_1_1?crid=12559014NVZG3&keywords=kevin+albin&qid=1660311858&sprefix=kevin+albin%2Caps%2C121&sr=8-1

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For more information about Piers Cross and other episodes of the podcast please visit: https://www.piers-cross.com

---

Piers is an author and a men's transformational coach and therapist who works mainly with trauma, boarding school issues, addictions and relationship problems.

He also runs online men's groups for ex-boarders, retreats and a podcast called An Evolving Man.

He is also the author of How to Survive and Thrive in Challenging Times. To purchase Piers first book: https://www.amazon.co.uk/How-Survive-Thrive-Challenging-Times/dp/B088T5L251/ref=sr_1_1?dchild=1&keywords=piers+cross&qid=1609869608&sr=8-1

For more videos please visit: http://youtube.com/pierscross

For FB: https://www.facebook.com/pierscrosspublic

For Piers' website and a free training How To Find Peace In Everyday Life: https://www.piers-cross.com/community

Many blessings,

Piers Cross

http://piers-cross.com/

On today's podcast I am excited to be speaking with Amelia White. In this episode she talks about co-educational boarding schools and the impact they have on girls and boys. How does it differ from single sex boarding schools? Amelia is a specialist in this area and has trained with Nick Duffell.

Why this podcast will be probably the most fascinating so far is that not only did Amelia go to the same boarding school as me, but we were on the same year! We reconnected last year when we realised that we are doing the same work with ex-boarders... 

Today we share our experiences at this coed boarding school. She shares some of the classic symptoms she sees in single sex and coeducational boarding schools. How are they different? How are they the same? Have they changed since our day?

---

Amelia White is a Humanistic Counsellor who works in private practice in Hove and online. She tutors on the Person Centred foundation degree course at East Sussex College. 

She has a specialism in working with those struggling as a result of their Boarding School experience and offers individual and couple therapy to those affected by their own or partners' schooling. She facilitates groups, run workshops, and courses. 

Some of the questions that Amelia answers:

1. I would love for you to share some of your journey into doing the work that you now do.
2. What was the experience for you as a girl at a coeducational boarding school? (Piers could add his experience as a boy in the school and regarding the girls).
3. In your work with ex boarders how does the experience of coeducational boarding schools differ from single sex boarding schools? 
4. In some circles, it is said that coeducational boarding is less traumatic than single sex boarding. Have you found this to be the case and if so why do you think this is?
5. In your work have you found that there are common ways that both single sex and coeducational boarding schools affect people? If so what might they be?
6. Nowadays a lot of boarding schools are becoming coeducational. Have they changed since our day. If so in what way? And how are they the same?
7. Healing boarding school syndrome. In your work have you found that you have to approach coeducational ex-boarders differently from others or the same? What have you found has worked the best?
8. What is the effect on girls of growing up in a co-ed school focused on patriarchal values?
9. The lack of safeguarding with regards sexual relationships developing at such young ages without an parents present.
10. How do people find out more about your work?

For more information about Amelia work please do visit: https://www.theboardingschooltherapist.com/

Or her Facebook boarding school group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/boardingschoolawarenessandwellbeing/

---

Piers is an author and a men's transformational coach and therapist

---

Piers is an author and a men's transformational coach and therapist who works mainly with trauma, boarding school issues, addictions and relationship problems.

He also runs online men's groups for ex-boarders, retreats and a podcast called An Evolving Man.

He is also the author of How to Survive and Thrive in Challenging Times. To purchase Piers first book: https://www.amazon.co.uk/How-Survive-Thrive-Challenging-Times/dp/B088T5L251/ref=sr_1_1?dchild=1&keywords=piers+cross&qid=1609869608&sr=8-1

For more videos please visit: http://youtube.com/pierscross

For FB: https://www.facebook.com/pierscrosspublic

For Piers' website and a free training How To Find Peace In Everyday Life: https://www.piers-cross.com/community

Many blessings,

Piers Cross

http://piers-cross.com/

Today's podcast welcomes Robert Verkaik to speak about his book, Posh Boys, how English public schools ruin Britain. 

In a fascinating discussion Robert outlines why he feels that the public school system doesn't work and what are some of the solutions to this issue.

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Robert is an author and journalist specialising in security and social mobility. His journalism appears in the Guardian, Independent, i newspaper, Sunday Telegraph and Sunday Times.  

In 2013 he was runner-up at the National Press Awards for the category of specialist journalist. Robert has also been long-listed for the Orwell Prize and the Paul Foot Award. In 2001 he was named law journalist of the year and has twice been runner-up. 

He is the author of five books.

Questions for Robert:

1. I would love for you to share some of your journey into the work that you now do.
2. Could you please speak more about the English public schools. What drew you into writing the book, Posh Boys? How are these public schools the ruin of Britain?
3. Could you speak a little about the history of public schools. How did they begin? Were they always intended for the privileged? How did the educational ideals of people like William Wykeham become usurped by England's rich and powerful families?
4. Could you speak to the link between the brutal nature of public schooling and the brutal suppression in Asia and Africa during the British Empire? (P.34) What were the public schools like during that time? Did that impact how the British ruled their Empire?
5. Michael Goldfarb mentions that the elite and the 'Establishment' used to be in the church, the military and the Empire. But now it has shifted towards the corporate world. Could that be a reason why the UK government, judiciary, business and military have such strong ties to the public schools? How does it impact the rest of the UK having this close knit community?
6. You mention the word apartheid in your book. Would you say that we now have a subtle class divide (P. 308 PB) that is a type of social apartheid? Only those that are rich get the tops jobs.
7. How have these public schools increased the divide between rich and poor? Why is it that we won't get rich?
8. Is the public school system fit for purpose? Is it helping to bring us closer together to build a fairer society or is it driving us apart? (P. 6 PB)
9. I would love you speak about the current energy and cost of living crisis. Has the public school system exacerbated the problem?
10. We now have a new non-private school educated prime minister in Liz Truss. Do you feel that things can now start to change?
11. What do you feel is the solution to the crisis that we are now faced with?

#poshboys #publicschools #privateschools #leadershipcrisis

For more information about Robert's work please do visit: https://robertverkaik.com

Or to purchase his books:

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Piers is an author and a men's transformational coach and therapist who works mainly with trauma, boarding school issues, addictions and relationship problems.

He also runs online men's groups for ex-boarders, retreats and a podcast called An Evolving Man.

He is also the author of How to Survive and Thrive in Challenging Times. To purchase Piers first book: https://www.amazon.co.uk/How-Survive-Thrive-Challenging-Times/dp/B088T5L251/ref=sr_1_1?dchild=1&keywords=piers+cross&qid=1609869608&sr=8-1

For more videos please visit: http://youtube.com/pierscross

For FB: https://www.facebook.com/pierscrosspublic

For Piers' website and a free training How To Find Peace In Everyday Life: https://www.piers-cross.com/community

Many blessings,

Piers Cross

http://piers-cross.com/

Today on the podcast we are talking about leadership, trauma, boarding school and how we heal. I am delighted to be talking with Martin Lloyd-Elliott who is one of the UK's leading psychologists and psychotherapists who specialises in working with leaders.

Here he talks about what trauma is. He then goes on to talk about leadership and especially political leadership. What makes a great leader? Does the boarding school system create great leaders or does it create leaders who don't always do the best for those that they lead?

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Martin Lloyd-Elliott has worked for thirty one years in full time private practice as a Chartered Psychologist and psychotherapist during which he has worked with over 1500 clients.

He also coaches business executives and management teams in cutting-edge leadership skills, specialising in the creation and development of Super Teams.

Principal teachers and influences are James Hollis, Petrushka Clarkson, Carl Jung, James Hillman, Joseph Campbell, and many others. `

Some of the areas that he speaks about:

1. I would love to hear you speak about how you got into the work that you now do in the world.
2. I would love you to introduce what you understand about trauma. What is trauma? How does it impact us as humans?
3. “To actively choose a career in politics is pathological” James Hollis. Can you talk about this please?
4. I would love for you to talk about leadership and boarding school syndrome. Does boarding school turn out great leaders? Or is there a shadow side to boarding school education which produces wounded leaders? How might this impact the world?
5. I would love for you to speak a bit about the Jewel of the Crown – India and the British Empire. 
6. What makes a benevolent leader? How do we cultivate more of them in our world?
7. How do people learn more about you?

#leadership #martinlloydelliott #boardingschool #trauma

For more information and to get in touch with Martin please visit his website here: http://www.lloyd-elliott.com/

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Piers is an author and a men's transformational coach and therapist who works mainly with trauma, boarding school issues, addictions and relationship problems. 

He also runs online men's groups for ex-boarders, retreats and a podcast called An Evolving Man. 

He is also the author of How to Survive and Thrive in Challenging Times. To purchase Piers first book: https://www.amazon.co.uk/How-Survive-Thrive-Challenging-Times/dp/B088T5L251/ref=sr_1_1?dchild=1&keywords=piers+cross&qid=1609869608&sr=8-1 

For more videos please visit: http://youtube.com/pierscross 

For FB: https://www.facebook.com/pierscrosspublic 

For Piers' website and a free training How To Find Peace In Everyday Life: https://www.piers-cross.com/community 

Many blessings, Piers Cross http://piers-cross.com/ 

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Piers is an author and a men's transformational coach and therapist who works mainly with trauma, boarding school issues, addictions and relationship problems.

He also runs online men's groups for ex-boarders, retreats and a podcast called An Evolving Man.

He is also the author of How to Survive and Thrive in Challenging Times. To purchase Piers first book: https://www.amazon.co.uk/How-Survive-Thrive-Challenging-Times/dp/B088T5L251/ref=sr_1_1?dchild=1&keywords=piers+cross&qid=1609869608&sr=8-1

For more videos please visit: http://youtube.com/pierscross

For FB: https://www.facebook.com/pierscrosspublic

For Piers' website and a free training How To Find Peace In Everyday Life: https://www.piers-cross.com/community

Many blessings,

Piers Cross

http://piers-cross.com/

What is the history and global impact of boarding schools? Often on the podcast we have talked about the British boarding schools. Today we are starting to venture further afield.

In speaking with Petter Sandgren, who is Professor at the University of Stockholm, we start to explore the history of boarding schools and what the impact is of boarding school on the world.

What is the difference between the UK and the rest of the world regarding boarding schools. Are they the same?

We also have a fascinating discussion about character building at boarding schools. What has character building been historically at boarding school? And what can we do to change this?

 He also talks about Tom Brown's Schooldays and how this was the bible for many of the budding boarding schools around the world. How do we act, treat children, teach? Look at Tom Brown's Schooldays. 

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Petter Sandgren has an MA in Education and an MA in History from Umeå University, and an MA and a PhD in History from the European University Institute in Florence, Italy. In 2015 Sandgren published the first book – Internatskolorna – in a planned trilogy on elites in modern-day Sweden. In 2017 he defended his doctoral thesis Globalising Eton: A Transnational History of Elite Boarding Schools since 1799. 

Sandgren has previously taught history of education and European studies at Uppsala University and Lund University before joining the Department of Education at Stockholm University in the fall of 2016. Sandgren’s research interests include transnational and comparative approaches to the history of modern and contemporary Europe, as well as history and sociology of education; the history of European integration; history and sociology of elites and the upper classes. 

Questions and topics that we talk about:

1. I would love for you to share some of your journey and how you got passionate in the subject of the elites and upper classes and how they are educated?
2. Could you speak a little about the history of global elite boarding schools?
3. Your thesis is called Globalising Eton. How much of an impact has Eton and the other English boarding schools had on the rest of the world? Has that impact been positive or negative?
4. Could you please talk about leadership training. In your experience what is it that these elite boarding schools teach about leadership?
5. Would you say that these schools have changed?
6. What are the ideas that these elite boarding schools are trying to emulate?
7. In your opinion what might the impact be on the rest of the world if the leaders have been educated in this way?
8. Anything else that you would like to share?

#historyofboardingschools #globalisingeton #eton #globalboardingschool #eliteeducation

To read Petter's thesis, Globalising Eton please download it here: https://cadmus.eui.eu/bitstream/handle/1814/46566/Sandgren_2017.pdf?sequence=1

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Piers is an author and a men's transformational coach and therapist who

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Piers is an author and a men's transformational coach and therapist who works mainly with trauma, boarding school issues, addictions and relationship problems.

He also runs online men's groups for ex-boarders, retreats and a podcast called An Evolving Man.

He is also the author of How to Survive and Thrive in Challenging Times. To purchase Piers first book: https://www.amazon.co.uk/How-Survive-Thrive-Challenging-Times/dp/B088T5L251/ref=sr_1_1?dchild=1&keywords=piers+cross&qid=1609869608&sr=8-1

For more videos please visit: http://youtube.com/pierscross

For FB: https://www.facebook.com/pierscrosspublic

For Piers' website and a free training How To Find Peace In Everyday Life: https://www.piers-cross.com/community

Many blessings,

Piers Cross

http://piers-cross.com/

What does trauma have to do with our current global challenges? Is there a link between trauma and the difficulties that we currently face? Today I speak with Matthew Green who is a climate journalist with an interest in collective trauma healing. How do we heal?

Matthew Green is a former Reuters climate and Financial Times correspondent and has reported from more than 30 countries. 

He is now global investigations editor at DeSmog, a nonprofit climate news service. He is also a co-host of the Collective Trauma Summit 2022 and a student on Thomas Hübl’s two-year Timeless Wisdom Training program. He writes the Resonant World newsletter on healing collective trauma. He is also the author of the book Aftershock: The Untold Story of Surviving Peace.

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Questions and topics to talk about:

1. I would love for you to share some of your journey and how you got passionate about climate change and collective trauma healing?
2. Could you speak a little about climate change and what you have seen unfolding over the past few years?
3. What is collective trauma healing? And how do you feel that links into some of the issues we face as a species?
4. Having just read Nick Duffell's book, Wounded Leaders, have you any further thoughts into the current climate crisis, the leaders, boarding school and how that links into collective trauma?
5. Some topics to talk about (excerpts from Matthew's brilliant article https://www.desmog.com/2022/09/27/collective-trauma-healing-climate-change-activism/):
   1. “The impact of events that took place decades or even centuries ago, can cascade through generations, silently shaping the destiny of communities, cultures, and nations.”
   2. How when we suppress the vulnerable parts of ourselves that we don't take care of the vulnerable in society. Could the vulnerable also be seen as the environment?
   3. “The industrialized world’s failure to mount a meaningful response to climate change is itself a symptom of collective trauma, rooted in patterns of exploitation handed down over generations.”
   4. “People who suffered early adversity often resort to self-medicating their pain to society’s pursuit of endless, fossil fuel-powered economic growth.”
   5. “Could politicians’ apparent paralysis in response to the threat mirror the way individuals with significant trauma may go emotionally numb, or avoid potential triggers, rather than acknowledge their deepest hurt?”
   6. The power of community to heal
   7. The power of leaders becoming trauma informed
   8. Humanity's greatest threat is also the greatest opportunity

#climatechange #climatecrisis #collectivetraumahealing #woundedleaders

To read more of Matthew's work please visit his website here: https://matthewgreenjournalism.com/

To join the Resonant World email list on Substack: https://m

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Piers is an author and a men's transformational coach and therapist who works mainly with trauma, boarding school issues, addictions and relationship problems.

He also runs online men's groups for ex-boarders, retreats and a podcast called An Evolving Man.

He is also the author of How to Survive and Thrive in Challenging Times. To purchase Piers first book: https://www.amazon.co.uk/How-Survive-Thrive-Challenging-Times/dp/B088T5L251/ref=sr_1_1?dchild=1&keywords=piers+cross&qid=1609869608&sr=8-1

For more videos please visit: http://youtube.com/pierscross

For FB: https://www.facebook.com/pierscrosspublic

For Piers' website and a free training How To Find Peace In Everyday Life: https://www.piers-cross.com/community

Many blessings,

Piers Cross

http://piers-cross.com/

Dr Helen Roche talks in this episode about education in the Third Reich and specifically the Nazi boarding schools, the Napolas. Very little has been shared about what went on in the education of the elite Nazi children until Dr Roche's book.

Today we talk about the history and the timeline of these schools and some of the links to the Spartan philosophies and British boarding schools.

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Dr. Helen Roche is Associate Professor in Modern European Cultural History at the University of Durham. Her second book, The Third Reich’s Elite Schools: A History of the Napolas, has recently been published by Oxford University Press. Her work has been featured in the press nationally and internationally, including appearances in the Times, The Guardian, The Daily Telegraph, on the BBC and Sky News. 

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Questions and topics to talk about:

1. I would love for you to share some of your journey and how you got to where you are now?
2. Could you introduce us to the Nazi boardings schools, the Napolas please? What were they and when were they formed? What was their role in the rise of the Third Reich?
3. Could you talk about ancient Sparta's influence on German education and especially the Napolas?
4. What was the Napolas' connection to the English and American boarding schools? How much of an influence was the English boarding school model on the Nazi one? What did Hitler feel he could learn from these schools? Did the Nazi achieve their aim?
5. Could you please talk more about the 'character-forming' that the Napolas learned from the British system? It sounds like the Nazis were very keen to learn about this. What were some of the 'character-forming' practices that the Nazis installed? How were they similar or dissimilar to the British schools. What did August Heissmeyer say?
6. Could you talk about the exchanges, visits from headteachers and sports tournaments with the British and US boarding schools? “The ideal outcome of the programme would be for Napola pupils and staff to learn how things were done in England, and then use that knowledge to improve their own educational techniques,” (Guardian 2021)
7. How supportive were the English boarding schools of their German counterparts? In one of your talks you mention the head from Lancing House Prep school show his support?
8. How many of the alumni from these schools went on to prominent positions in the SS and Third Reich? Were these important were these graduates considered once the war began?
9. The private school headmaster and the embodiment of the “Fuhrer-principle
10. Were the Napolas more effective at indoctrinating pupils politically than, for example, the Hitler Youth? If so why was that?
11. What were some of the tough practices that the Napolas put the children through?

#naziboardingschools #historyofboardingschools #boardingschoolsyndromecollectivetraumahealing #woundedleade

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Piers is an author and a men's transformational coach and therapist who works mainly with trauma, boarding school issues, addictions and relationship problems.

He also runs online men's groups for ex-boarders, retreats and a podcast called An Evolving Man.

He is also the author of How to Survive and Thrive in Challenging Times. To purchase Piers first book: https://www.amazon.co.uk/How-Survive-Thrive-Challenging-Times/dp/B088T5L251/ref=sr_1_1?dchild=1&keywords=piers+cross&qid=1609869608&sr=8-1

For more videos please visit: http://youtube.com/pierscross

For FB: https://www.facebook.com/pierscrosspublic

For Piers' website and a free training How To Find Peace In Everyday Life: https://www.piers-cross.com/community

Many blessings,

Piers Cross

http://piers-cross.com/

On the podcast today to celebrate the 50th episode I have a very special guest, Michelle Dawn Silcox. 

I have often been asked to talk about boarding school syndrome and relationships. 

Well, today I thought that I would get one of the experts in this field, my wife! 

Michelle is a relationship counsellor and has been interested in psychology and wellness for many decades. 

Today she shares some of her journey of being married to a boarding school survivor and what she advises those who are in relationships with ex-boarders and those ex-boarders themselves. 

Michelle Dawn Silcox is a complementary therapist, spiritual counsellor, and Reiki teacher. In her 20s she worked as a model and then became a complementary therapist and a spiritual and relationship counsellor. In her 30s she had a near death experience which gave her a greater understanding of the work that she was doing. In the 90s she set up a healing centre in Hebden Bridge which is still running to this day. She has also been married to the podcast host, Piers Cross, for the past 13 years.

Some of the questions that I ask her:

1. I would love for you to talk a bit about your life and journey.
2. In your work you talk about the importance of the masculine and the feminine. Can you please explain? How does this relate to relationships?
3. What are some of the key traits of ex-boarders in relationships? How is that different from people who have not been to boarding school? Both the positives and the negatives?
4. Can you talk about some of these other areas:
   1. Control and manipulation
   2. Project identifcation – when you feel like you are going crazy if the other partners is in denial or dissociation.
   3. Workoholism and how we struggle to stop
   4. Shut down hearts and how we open them up again.
   5. Growing up in a world with leaders with shut down hearts – what was it like growing up in this environment for a young girl – thinking that you had been born on the wrong planet.
   6. How we met
   7. Separation between sex and love
   8. Elders
   9. Complaining and blaming
5. What are relationships all about?
6. How does a man deal with a woman's anger or upset?
7. How do we as men/ ex-boarders/ people who have been through trauma heal and recover?

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Piers is an author and a men's transformational coach and therapist who works mainly with trauma, boarding school issues, addictions and relationship problems.

He also runs online men's groups for ex-boarders, retreats and a podcast called An Evolving Man.

He is also the author of How to Survive and Thrive in Challenging Times. To purchase Piers first book: https://www.amazon.co.uk/How-Survive-Thrive-Challenging-Times/dp/B088T5L251/ref=sr_1_1?dchild=1&keywords=piers+cross&qid=1609869608&sr=8-1

For more videos please visit: http://youtube.com/pierscross

For FB: https://www.facebook.com/pierscrosspublic

For Piers' website and a free training How To Find Peace In Everyday Life: https://www.piers-cross.com/community

Many blessings,

Piers Cross

http://piers-cross.com/

Today I am speaking with two experts in the field of energy psychology.

There are different forms of energy psychology from Psych-K to EFT (Emotional Freedom Techniques) and from Holographic Repatterning to Matrix Reimprinting.

 As Bruce Lipton PhD writes: "Energy psychology can induce radical changes in behaviour within minutes and in many cases, these changes produce permanent alterations in subconsciously programmed behaviours." 

Today our conversation will be focusing on EFT and Matrix Reimprinting. What are EFT and Matrix Reimprinting?

My guests will also be talking about trauma and how you can use energy psychology to start to heal trauma.

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Suzanne Fageol, is a certified counsellor, spiritual director, craniosacral therapist, somatic trauma release educator and EFT/Matrix Reimprinting coach. She has been educating those in the helping professions about working with people with trauma and stress for the past 10 years and has been an educator of somatic practices and the neuroscience of trauma for over 10 years. 

Dr Craig Weiner has spent over 35 year working in the health care field. He is a certified and accredited advanced practitioner and EFT master trainer of trainers. He is also a trainer of Matrix Reimprinting, co director of the EFT Tapping Training Institute and co director of the Tapping out of Trauma continuing education trainings. He is the co-producer and director of the film, the Science of Tapping. 

He is a popular lecturer and podcast guest and together with his wife and partner Alina Frank are the creators of the podcast, EFT Nation. He is profoundly interested in the underlying emotional and physical connections that stem from adversity and trauma as well as the facilitation of the transformation of trauma to post-resilience and post traumatic growth. More information can be found at EFTtappingtraining.com

Questions:

1. I would love for you to begin by sharing how you both got into the work that you now do.
2. What is trauma? What are the symptoms of trauma? How might trauma show up in adults?
3. How might trauma effect those around them? What if these people were in positions of influence?
4. What are some of the beliefs and patterns that are common in people who have been through trauma?
5. What is EFT and Matrix Reimprinting? What is the science behind EFT and Matrix Reimprinting? How does it work and why is it effective in the healing of trauma?
6. How do people learn more about the work that you do.

To find out more about the work that they do please do visit:

For Craig: https://www.efttappingtraining.com/

For Suzanne: https://www.tappingoutoftrauma.com

For their combined Tapping out of Trauma course for EFT practitioners: https://www.tappingoutoftrauma.com

---

Piers is an author and a men's transformational coach and therapist who works mainly with trauma, boarding school issues, addictions and relationship problems.

He also runs online men's groups for ex-boarders, retreats and a podcast called An Evolving Man.

He is also the author of How to Survive and Thrive in Challenging Times. To purchase Piers first book: https://www.amazon.co.uk/How-Survive-Thrive-Challenging-Times/dp/B088T5L251/ref=sr_1_1?dchild=1&keywords=piers+cross&qid=1609869608&sr=8-1

For more videos please visit: http://youtube.com/pierscross

For FB: https://www.facebook.com/pierscrosspublic

For Piers' website and a free training How To Find Peace In Everyday Life: https://www.piers-cross.com/community

Many blessings,

Piers Cross

http://piers-cross.com/

In this episode I am talking with leading clinical psychologist and author, Paul DeBlassie III. Paul has worked in the field of psychology for 30 years plus and has mainly specialised in working with religious abuse and trauma. He is also the bestselling author of several books including: Goddess of Everything, Goddess of The Wild Thing, and The Unholy.

I really enjoyed this conversation and loved how relaxed and wise Paul was. He talked about world leaders and the trauma that they carry. He talked about Putin and what he sees there. He also went into some depth about his work with trauma treatment and self-hatred. He went on to speak about self-sabotaging and how we find safety. A really fascinating conversation.

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Paul DeBlassie III, Ph.D. is a depth psychologist and award-winning writer living in his native New Mexico, crafting metaphysical thrillers energized with trickster mischief and natural magic. His novels, visionary thrillers, delve deep into archetypal realities as they play out dramatically in the lives of everyday people. Metaphysical dramas set in the mythopoeic realm of Aztlan open vistas of danger, conflict and potential transformation. Good and evil are pivotal arenas for unfolding tales of the supernatural.

Together with visionary/metaphysical novels, he also writes blogs and archetypal essays on trauma, dreams, spirituality, and intuition.

Some of the areas of interest:

1. I would love for you to share some of your journey. How did you arrive at doing what you do now?
2. Some of the areas to talk about:
   1. Spirituality
   2. Depth psychology
   3. Dreams – how do we connect and understand dreams? How do we integrate the messages that our dreams are telling us? What is the best way to work with dreams?
   4. Trauma and how to treat it
   5. Pain
   6. Archetypes
   7. The shadows
   8. World Leaders
   9. Finding safety 
   10. The culture of the church
3. Some of Paul's quotes: 
   1. "Depth psychologist Robert D. Romanyshyn in his paper, “The World Is a Tissue of Metaphors,” noted that the dream: “is a nightly address to the ego-mind which undoes its fixed positions, a kind of nightly humiliation that humbles consciousness and leads it back into the earth, a journey that re-situates mind in the humus, the soil of the soul. (2011, p. 2)”
   2. “Descent into the underworld, stepping into the Cave of All Knowing, and plunging into the mother sea of the collective unconscious, symbolize immersion into self, leaning into and immersing ourselves in the pulse and beat of the confluence of our inner and outer lives. From such immersion a transformation occurs: what Romanyshyn described as “ordinary epiphanies of the moment that, when we are ready and properly disposed, are momentous epiphanies, festive occasions when the miracle in the ordinary manifests itself, moments that are occasions for wonder and celebration” (2011, p. 4).”https://www.depthinsights.com 2012

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Piers is an author and a men's transformational coach and therapist who works mainly with trauma, boarding school issues, addictions and relationship problems.

He also runs online men's groups for ex-boarders, retreats and a podcast called An Evolving Man.

He is also the author of How to Survive and Thrive in Challenging Times. To purchase Piers first book: https://www.amazon.co.uk/How-Survive-Thrive-Challenging-Times/dp/B088T5L251/ref=sr_1_1?dchild=1&keywords=piers+cross&qid=1609869608&sr=8-1

For more videos please visit: http://youtube.com/pierscross

For FB: https://www.facebook.com/pierscrosspublic

For Piers' website and a free training How To Find Peace In Everyday Life: https://www.piers-cross.com/community

Many blessings,

Piers Cross

http://piers-cross.com/

On today's episode my guest is Rosemary Lamaison. In this podcast she shares her years of experience working as a counsellor with ex-boarders. What are some of the experiences of girls and boys at boarding school? Today Rosemary gives dozens of quotes and examples of how the boarding school education impacts girls and boys and the adults that they become.

A really fascinating and rich sharing from one of the leading therapists in the boarding school syndrome and boarding school survivors world.

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Rosemary Lamaison is a counsellor with 30 years’ experience. She works with adult clients from diverse backgrounds and covers a broad range of issues. These include couples, relationship and marriage guidance, parent and family issues and anxiety, stress, low confidence or low self-esteem. She also works with abuse and boarding school syndrome.

Some of the areas to talk about:

1. I would love for you to share some of your journey. How did you get into the work that you now do?
2. Can you please talk a little bit about some of the key issues relating to women ex-boarders:
   1. relationships, intimacy difficulties
   2. not having a voice, or being heard
   3. where can their experience be talked about 
   4. femininity
   5. puberty and their move to womanhood being 'uncelebrated'.
   6. education and low expectations - for those who are now in their 50,60,70's. Should I say 'limited' education and being 'taught' to be a good wife ! 
   7. what do they do with their sadness, rage
   8. How do they display their skills / abilities without being seen as 'bossy', 'aggressive'
   9. having to adopt male behaviours in the male working environments
   10. how to parent, having not had the role model that would help 
   11. self esteem and confidence
   12. false self, loss of authentic self.   Appearing confident but hiding their vulnerable self - also a male issue
   13. food, eating disorders - hunger, comfort eating ... long term impact  
   14. where's home [also for men of course]
   15. travelling from overseas, put i/c of younger sibling, missing close contact with, and kindness from, ayahs, staff, 

For more information about Rosemary's work please visit: https://rosemarylamaisoncounselling.com

For Boarding Recovery and a list of registered therapists please visit: https://boardingrecovery.com/

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Piers is an author and a men's transformational coach and therapist who works mainly with trauma, boarding school issues, addictions and relationship problems.

He also runs online men's groups for ex-boarders, retreats and a podcast called An Evolving Man.

He is also the author of How to Survive and Thrive in Challenging Times. To purchase Piers first book: https://www.amazon.co.uk/How-Survive-Thrive-Challenging-Times/dp/B088T5L251/ref=sr_1_1?dchild=1&keywords=piers+cross&qid=1609869608&sr=8-1

For more videos please visit: http://youtube.com/pierscross

For FB: https://www.facebook.com/pierscrosspublic

For Piers' website and a free training How To Find Peace In Everyday Life: https://www.piers-cross.com/community

Many blessings,

Piers Cross

http://piers-cross.com/

What makes a contented couple? Are there certain keys to having a thriving and loving intimate relationship? What if you didn't have a happy childhood? Can you still have a fulfilling and happy relationship?

Today I am speaking with Annie Power who is a couple counsellor and author. We talk about attachment theory and how that relates to relationships. How important is it to be a securely attached person in a couple? Annie shares different keys that you can cultivate to have a loving relationship, keys that are synonymous with contented couples.

---

Anne Power, is a couple counsellor and has taught psychotherapy and supervision on university courses in London. She has published many academic papers on attachment and two books. 

She started her counselling work thirty years ago. Her initial training was as a psychoanalytic psychotherapist with a special interest in attachment theory. Later she trained in a systemic model and this integration – of attachment and systemic thinking - matches with EFT (Emotionally Focused Couple Therapy) which is the model in which she is now developing her practice.

Some of the questions and areas interest:

1. I would love for you to share some of your journey. How did you arrive at doing what you do now?
2. Would you please introduce us to attachment theory. What is it? Could you talk a little about the different forms of attachment? (p. 15)
3. Could you please speak to how attachment theory relates to relationships?
4. In your research into the book, Contented Couples, what did you find made up a contented couple? You talk about a formula for a contented relationship. What is this? (p.3)
5. What is good-enough marriage? (p. 5)
6. If you have not had a secure attachment as a child (many of my listeners have been to boarding school) can we still cultivate a contented relationship? From those that you interviewed and in your experience how do we go about that? (p.35)
7. If a person enters a relationship and they don't feel that they are loveable and that they can love others, how do they heal this? (p. 3)
8. Could you please talk about how romantic and maternal relationships are similar? (p.46)
9. What makes a relationship work in the long run? (p.146-180)
10. Some other areas to talk about:
    1. Self-care regarding relationships
    2. Boarding school syndrome and attachment theory

For more information about Anne Power please visit: https://www.contentedcouples.com/

Or to purchase her book: https://www.karnacbooks.com/product/contented-couples-magic-logic-or-luck/96376/?MATCH=1

Or on Amazon: https://www.amazon.co.uk/Contented-Couples-Magic-Logic-Luck/dp/1913494462/ref=tmm_pap_swatch_0?_encoding=UTF8&qid=&sr= 

---

Piers is an author and a men's transformational coach and therapist who works mainly with trauma, boarding school issues, addictions and relationship problems.

He also runs online men's groups for ex-boarders, retreats and a podcast called An Evolving Man.

He is also the author of How to Survive and Thrive in Challenging Times. To purchase Piers first book: https://www.amazon.co.uk/How-Survive-Thrive-Challenging-Times/dp/B088T5L251/ref=sr_1_1?dchild=1&keywords=piers+cross&qid=1609869608&sr=8-1

For more videos please visit: http://youtube.com/pierscross

For FB: https://www.facebook.com/pierscrosspublic

For Piers' website and a free training How To Find Peace In Everyday Life: https://www.piers-cross.com/community

Many blessings,

Piers Cross

http://piers-cross.com/

What does one of the UK leading lawyers into child sexual abuse think about IICSA (Independent Inquiry into Child Sexual Abuse)? 

What does he feel about mandatory reporting? (At the moment there is no law that states that schools or organisations need to report child sexual abuse). 

What does he feel? Is this right? What needs to be done? 

And what about cases like Jimmy Saville, Bishop Peter Ball and John Smythe? 

How did the UK allow these paedophiles to operate and even support them for so many years? 

Dino Nocivelli is a partner in the abuse department at Leigh Day law firm and joined the company in 2022. Dino specialises in actions for child sexual abuse survivors. Dino has appeared in a significant number of media publications providing his expert opinion and commentary, including among others the BBC, ITV and the Guardian. He has also provided evidence to the Independent Inquiry into Child Sexual Abuse (IICSA).

Areas to explore:

1. I would love to hear some of your journey and how you got into the work that you are now doing?
2. Could you speak about your work around child sexual abuse (CSA) and some of the cases that you have been putting together?
3. How widespread is CSA in Britain?
4. I would love to hear you speak about the IICSA process. What was IICSA? What were its aims? Did they succeed in these aims? What was the final verdict? 
5. Could you please talk about mandatory reporting? What do you feel about the importance of having mandatory reporting in schools and boarding schools? Has IICSA now made this a requirement by law?
6. Could you talk a little about Jimmy Saville, John Smythe and cases like Bishop Peter Ball.
7. What about boarding schools? What have you found out about boarding schools and CSA? In your opinion should these schools be able to retain their charitable status? 
8. How do people find out more about your work?

To find more about Dino please visit: https://www.leighday.co.uk/about-us/our-people/partners/dino-nocivelli/

To read some of his blog posts about boarding schools: https://www.leighday.co.uk/latest-updates/blog/2022-blogs/malsis-school-convictions-how-was-abuse-able-to-go-on-for-so-long/

#childsexualabuse #csa #abuseawarenessweek #jimmysaville 

Five Leading Child Sexual Abuse Charities: http://www.frsb.org.uk/the-top-5-uk-sexual-abuse-charities/

---

Piers is an author and a men's transformational coach and therapist who works mainly with trauma, boarding school issues, addictions and relationship problems.

He also runs online men's groups for ex-boarders, retreats and a podcast called An Evolving Man.

He is also the author of How to Survive and Thrive in Challenging Times. To purchase Piers first book: https://www.amazon.co.uk/How-Survive-Thrive-Challenging-Times/dp/B088T5L251/ref=sr_1_1?dchild=1&keywords=piers+cross&qid=1609869608&sr=8-1

For more videos please visit: http://youtube.com/pierscross

For FB: https://www.facebook.com/pierscrosspublic

For Piers' website and a free training How To Find Peace In Everyday Life: https://www.piers-cross.com/community

Many blessings,

Piers Cross

http://piers-cross.com/

On today's podcast we go deep into working with the archetypes. How do we move from the Hero's Journey, more for the transition from boyhood/ girlhood to early manhood/ womanhood to the Sovereign's Journey, for the maturing adult?

What are the ways that we can work with the archetypes?

How do we bring our inner King and Queen online, also known as the Sovereign?

A really fascinating discussion with one of the UK's leading men's work coaches and facilitators.

---

Hugh P Newton has been working with men for more than twenty five years. He works as a coach, runs workshops for men and is involved in A Band of Brothers and the Mankind Project.

Hugh is also the author of the book The Sovereign's Journey.

Some of the topics and questions to cover:

1. I would love for you to share some of your journey. How did you get into the work you now do?
2. Could you please talk about the importance of men's work. Robert Bly in Iron John says that the young men need the support of older men. What is your experience of this? How do we as older men find the younger men to help?
3. Could you please explain what the Sovereign's Journey is? How does it differ from the Hero's Journey?
4. What are the archetypes? (P. 25)
5. What is the collective unconscious?
6. What is the role of the King or the Sovereign?
7. Could you please speak a little about why getting to know your shadows are so important? How does that help us (p. 26)
8. What are some of the practices to help us connect to each of the archetypes in their fullness?
9. Could you please share some of your boarding school experiences? How was boarding school in Rhodesia?
10. How do people learn more about your work or reach out?

To learn more about Hugh's work please visit: https://www.thesovereignsjourney.co.uk

And to purchase his book please visit: https://www.amazon.co.uk/Sovereigns-Journey-Hugh-P-Newton/dp/B0BMJXR7RV/ref=sr_1_1?crid=PHPEWYGS5U0Z&keywords=hugh+newton&qid=1676566640&sprefix=hugh+newton%2Caps%2C676&sr=8-1

---

Piers is an author and a men's transformational coach and therapist who works mainly with trauma, boarding school issues, addictions and relationship problems.

He also runs online men's groups for ex-boarders, retreats and a podcast called An Evolving Man.

He is also the author of How to Survive and Thrive in Challenging Times. To purchase Piers first book: https://www.amazon.co.uk/How-Survive-Thrive-Challenging-Times/dp/B088T5L251/ref=sr_1_1?dchild=1&keywords=piers+cross&qid=1609869608&sr=8-1

For more videos please visit: http://youtube.com/pierscross

For FB: https://www.facebook.com/pierscrosspublic

For Piers' website and a free training How To Find Peace In Everyday Life: https://www.piers-cross.com/community

Many blessings,

Piers Cross

http://piers-cross.com/

What is mindfulness? What is the path to happiness? How do we overcome addictions using mindfulness? And what are some of the key teachings of Buddhism?

Today I am speaking with Buddhist psychologist and best-selling author, Thomas Bien, PhD in a fascinating conversation about happiness, mindfulness and recovery from trauma and addictions.

Dr Bien has lectured around the world and spent time with the Vietnamese Buddhist monk, Thich Nhat Hahn (or Thay).

---

Dr. Thomas Bien is a licensed psychologist, author, and mindfulness teacher.  In addition to his doctorate in psychology, he also holds a master's degree in theology from Princeton Theological Seminary.   

He is the author of numerous scientific articles and book chapters in psychology, especially in the areas of spirituality and addiction. He is the author of Mindful Recovery, Finding the Center Within, and Mindful Therapy. He is also the coeditor of Mindfulness and the Therapeutic Relationship. 

Some of the topics and questions to cover:

1. I would love for you to share some of your journey. How did you get into the work you now do?
2. I would love for you to share some of the insights you learned about the path to happiness. How do we lead a more contented and happier life?
3. What are some of the Buddhist teachings that have had the greatest impact on you?
4. What are some of the Buddhist teachings that have had the greatest impact on your clients?
5. What are some of the barriers to happiness?
6. How do we start to learn to enjoy the small, joyful moments more and more?
7. Many of my listeners have been through a lot of trauma. What is your suggestion for those who have been through trauma? What has worked best for your clients and in the research that you've done?
8. Could you talk about mindfulness and addictions please? In your work what is the cause of addictions and how does mindfulness help with the overcoming of addictions?
9. What are some of the tools that you recommend for overcoming anxiety and stress?

To learn more about Dr Bien work's please visit: https://www.mindfulpsychology.com/

And to purchase his books please visit: https://www.amazon.co.uk/Thomas-Bien/e/B001ITTUC6/ref=dp_byline_cont_pop_book_1

---

Piers is an author and a men's transformational coach and therapist who works mainly with trauma, boarding school issues, addictions and relationship problems.

He also runs online men's groups for ex-boarders, retreats and a podcast called An Evolving Man.

He is also the author of How to Survive and Thrive in Challenging Times. To purchase Piers first book: https://www.amazon.co.uk/How-Survive-Thrive-Challenging-Times/dp/B088T5L251/ref=sr_1_1?dchild=1&keywords=piers+cross&qid=1609869608&sr=8-1

For more videos please visit: http://youtube.com/pierscross

For FB: https://www.facebook.com/pierscrosspublic

For Piers' website and a free training How To Find Peace In Everyday Life: https://www.piers-cross.com/community

Many blessings,

Piers Cross

http://piers-cross.com/

What is heart-led leadership? What are men's circles and men's group and why are they so helpful? What can we do for men's mental health at the moment? 

Today I am speaking with Peter Eugène Bennett. Peter is a men's coach who also works with the Sons of Zion and the Sacred Sons. 

He has trained in Vipassana Meditation, Wim Hof, Nutritional Therapy, Brazilian Jiu-Jitsu, Qigong, Tantra, and is currently training as a Mentor & Coach.

His work now is focused on helping men reach their potential, creating healthy community spaces of brotherhood so they can be of service to the world and each other. 

Questions and areas to talk about:

1. I would love for you to share some of your journey. How did you get into the work that you now do?
2. Could you please speak to men's work. What is men's work? And why it is so transformational?
3. I would love for you to talk about what you understand about trauma and the body. How can we better get in touch with our bodies if we have been through trauma?
4. Could you please speak to ancestry. What is the importance of understanding our ancestry?
5. I would love for you to speak about your boarding school experiences. How was it for you? What were the gifts and what were the shadows?
6. How important is community to healing? How do we start to cultivate loving and transformational communities?
7. Could you please speak to men's mental health, suicide and self-harm?
8. How do people learn more about your work or reach out?

You can follow Peter Eugène Bennett on IG: @mensworkcoach 

Linktree: https://linktr.ee/mensworkcoach

Or his website here: https://www.mensworkcoach.com/

Sacred Sons: https://www.sacredsons.com/

Sons of Zion: https://www.sonsofzion.uk/

---

Piers is an author and a men's transformational coach and therapist who works mainly with trauma, boarding school issues, addictions and relationship problems.

He also runs online men's groups for ex-boarders, retreats and a podcast called An Evolving Man.

He is also the author of How to Survive and Thrive in Challenging Times. To purchase Piers first book: https://www.amazon.co.uk/How-Survive-Thrive-Challenging-Times/dp/B088T5L251/ref=sr_1_1?dchild=1&keywords=piers+cross&qid=1609869608&sr=8-1

For more videos please visit: http://youtube.com/pierscross

For FB: https://www.facebook.com/pierscrosspublic

For Piers' website and a free training How To Find Peace In Everyday Life: https://www.piers-cross.com/community

Many blessings,

Piers Cross

http://piers-cross.com/

"Boarding Schools Are Traumatic & Dangerous for Most Children" Today I am speaking with Joss Goulden who is trained in psychology and is a parenting coach. She also went to boarding school for 10 years.

Here she talks about why she feels that boarding schools are not safe places to bring up children. How boarding schools create trauma in our young people rather than helping them to flourish.

She shares some of the solutions. 

Areas to talk about:

1.  I would love for you to share some of your journey. How did you get into the work that you now do?
2.  What is Aware Parenting? What does it mean to consciously parent our children?
3.  What is the impact of trauma on children? How do we heal our traumatised children?
4.  How do we support children to experience less adversity and suffering?
5.  I would love for you to speak about your boarding school experiences. How was it like for you? How has it impacted the work you now do? 
6.  Do you feel that boarding school has an impact on a child? If so what might that be?
7.  Do you feel that we normalize boarding school and childhood trauma? What is the impact of this normalization?
8.  What is the positive way of working with children?
9.  In your work what is the power of speaking up and sharing our stories?
10.  How do people learn more about your work or reach out?

“I attended boarding school in the UK for 10 years from the age of 8.  Since then, I have dedicated most of my adult life to learning more about attachment, trauma and healing, initially for myself and then to support others. 

On leaving school, I completed a BSc in Psychology, and post-graduate qualifications in Human Communication Science and Counselling. I became a parent myself in 2003 and was blessed to discover Aware Parenting shortly after that. I am now a parenting coach and an Aware Parenting Instructor, certified with the Aware Parenting Institute, founded by Aletha Solter Ph.D.

I support parents to raise their children with more awareness, connection and secure attachment, and with significantly less trauma, adversity and suffering, much of which involves supporting parents to also process and heal their own stress and trauma from their childhoods. 

I am passionate about increasing the understanding of the impacts of stress and trauma on children to ensure more children are raised with compassion. Part of this is understanding the impact of the trauma of boarding school attendance so that fewer parents choose to send their children away to these institutions and instead choose to keep their children at home with them. I offer individual and group sessions to parents, as well as courses and communities. 

To find out more about Joss' work: https://awareparenting.com.au/

Or find her on social media @awareparentingwithjoss

---

Piers is an author and a men's transformational coach and therapist who works mainly with trauma, boarding school issues, addictions and relationship problems.

He also runs online men's groups for ex-boarders, retreats and a podcast called An Evolving Man.

He is also the author of How to Survive and Thrive in Challenging Times. To purchase Piers first book: https://www.amazon.co.uk/How-Survive-Thrive-Challenging-Times/dp/B088T5L251/ref=sr_1_1?dchild=1&keywords=piers+cross&qid=1609869608&sr=8-1

For more videos please visit: http://youtube.com/pierscross

For FB: https://www.facebook.com/pierscrosspublic

For Piers' website and a free training How To Find Peace In Everyday Life: https://www.piers-cross.com/community

Many blessings,

Piers Cross

http://piers-cross.com/

Anabel Gonzalez, M. D., Ph. D. works as a psychiatrist and psychotherapist in the Public Mental Health System. She coordinates the Trauma and Dissociation Program in the Severe Mental Disorders Services of the University Hospital of A Coruña, and has a broad clinical experience with Dissociative Disorders and Complex Trauma. 

Trained in different psychotherapeutic approaches, she has been working with EMDR since 1999 and is an EMDR trainer. Anabel Gonzalez is President of the Spanish EMDR Association and she is author of several articles, presentations, and books 

Some areas and questions to explore:

1.  I would love for you to share some of your journey. How did you get into the work that you now do?
2.  Could you please explain more about the difference between trauma and complex trauma?
3.  Could you please talk a little about attachment and the importance of secure attachment in childhood?
4.  What is dissociation? Why does dissociation happen with trauma?
5.  In the UK we have normalised sending children to boarding school from the ages of 5, 8 or 11. As a psychiatrist who specialises in trauma, attachment & dissociation what is your clinical opinion of this practice? Might the breaking of attachment at this age and putting children into a loveless institution potentially create complex trauma? And if so what might that impact me on the child, and the adult? What if these adults were in charge of government? Might that effect those around them?
6.  You mention in your book that people with dissociation, “feel, think or do things that are quite different from what they would like to do.” Could this explain why so many leaders who have been to boarding school act in a contradictory way? Because of complex trauma?
7.  What might the impact be on a child who is left in an institution by their caregiver for long periods of time and told that this will be good for them? When the reality turns out to be very different how might this impact the child.
8.  What are the key tools you use with clients to help them overcome dissociation?
9.  Could you please talk about the importance of making mistakes in the healing of complex trauma? I really love this idea
10.  In your clinical opinion, what can we do about the boarding school situation? And our leaders?
11.  What are some of the solutions to complex trauma?
12.  How do people find out more about your work?

To buy Dr Gonzalez's books please visit: https://www.amazon.co.uk/Its-not-Understanding-Attachment-Dissociation/dp/8409066866/ref=sr_1_1?qid=1679737611&refinements=p_27%3AAnabel+Gonzalez&s=books&sr=1-1&text=Anabel+Gonzalez

To learn more about her work: https://anabelgonzalez.es/

---

Piers is an author and a men's transformational coach and therapist who works mainly with trauma, boarding school issues, addictions and relationship problems.

He also runs online men's groups for ex-boarders, retreats and a podcast called An Evolving Man.

He is also the author of How to Survive and Thrive in Challenging Times. To purchase Piers first book: https://www.amazon.co.uk/How-Survive-Thrive-Challenging-Times/dp/B088T5L251/ref=sr_1_1?dchild=1&keywords=piers+cross&qid=1609869608&sr=8-1

For more videos please visit: http://youtube.com/pierscross

For FB: https://www.facebook.com/pierscrosspublic

For Piers' website and a free training How To Find Peace In Everyday Life: https://www.piers-cross.com/community

Many blessings,

Piers Cross

http://piers-cross.com/

Jai Singh is a men's coach and workshop leader who specialises in helping fathers find a deeper sense of purpose in their lives. He also runs a 10 week program for fathers, called The New King.

Some of the areas to cover:

1.  I would love for you to share some of your journey. How did you get into the work that you now do?
2. What are some of the challenges that men face as fathers in today's world?
3. Could you please talk a little about marriage and fatherhood as a crucible for personal growth and evolution?
4. Could you please speak to conscious masculinity in the context of fatherhood?
5. How do we start to create a life of purpose and passion as a father?
6. If you are happy to talk about this I would love to hear your experience of growing up with a father who went to boarding school. How was it?
7.  How do we as men and father deal with being triggered in our roles as Dads?
8.  What is the importance for us to have a relationship with ourselves before we begin having a relationship with our family? How do you help men to do this?
9.  What are some of the practices you get men to do?
10.  What is a healthy King in your eyes. How do we cultivate that as fathers?
11.  How do we shoulder greater responsibility?
12.  How do people learn more about your work or reach out?

To learn more about Jai work's please visit: https://www.awakened-masculine.com

• Call booking page: https://www.awakened-masculine.com/call
• Youtube channel: https://www.youtube.com/@awakenedmasculine55
• Instagram:https://www.instagram.com/the.awakened.masculine/

---

Piers is an author and a men's transformational coach and therapist who works mainly with trauma, boarding school issues, addictions and relationship problems.

He also runs online men's groups for ex-boarders, retreats and a podcast called An Evolving Man.

He is also the author of How to Survive and Thrive in Challenging Times. To purchase Piers first book: https://www.amazon.co.uk/How-Survive-Thrive-Challenging-Times/dp/B088T5L251/ref=sr_1_1?dchild=1&keywords=piers+cross&qid=1609869608&sr=8-1

For more videos please visit: http://youtube.com/pierscross

For FB: https://www.facebook.com/pierscrosspublic

For Piers' website and a free training How To Find Peace In Everyday Life: https://www.piers-cross.com/community

Many blessings,

Piers Cross

http://piers-cross.com/

Today I wanted to talk about a subject which is very close to my heart - that of mental health and especially with regards to teenagers. 

As a teenager in boarding school I really struggled with my mental health. 

I was suicidal and at the age of 14 one of my friends at boarding school committed suicide. 

It devastated me although I never dared shared my emotion with anyone. That was not allow in boarding school! 

So today I offer some reflections about mental health. 

- Why are our teenagers struggling so much mentally? 
- And what can we do as parents and adults to help? 
- What do psychiatrists like Christopher Palmer from Harvard Medical School say?

Please do share below any practices that you have implemented or use with your children? 

Warm regards, Piers 

#suicideprevention #mentalhealth #teenagementalhealth #childhoodtrauma

---

Piers is an author and a men's transformational coach and therapist who works mainly with trauma, boarding school issues, addictions and relationship problems.

He also runs online men's groups for ex-boarders, retreats and a podcast called An Evolving Man.

He is also the author of How to Survive and Thrive in Challenging Times. To purchase Piers first book: https://www.amazon.co.uk/How-Survive-Thrive-Challenging-Times/dp/B088T5L251/ref=sr_1_1?dchild=1&keywords=piers+cross&qid=1609869608&sr=8-1

For more videos please visit: http://youtube.com/pierscross

For FB: https://www.facebook.com/pierscrosspublic

For Piers' website and a free training How To Find Peace In Everyday Life: https://www.piers-cross.com/community

Many blessings,

Piers Cross

http://piers-cross.com/

“Our vulnerability is our superpower.” These words come from the co-director and executive producer of one of my favourite films, 'The Work'.

The Work is one of the most powerful films I have come across. It has me in tears every time.

What is it? The journey of three men visiting Folsom Prison to attend a four day men's retreat.

What unfolds is so beautiful. Grown men in tears. Some of the toughest men on the planet showing their vulnerability.

If they can do it, so can we. To watch the film please visit: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OEUHVVAPyTA

He also talks about one of his other films about the Brazilian Jujitsu Master Renzo Gracie called Renzo Gracie: Legacy: https://youtu.be/s3HrHJ_dQl0

---

Gethin Aldous is a film and video game maker who believes in the power of story to transform lives. He was co-director and executive producer of The Work documentary, winning a UK Grierson Award for Best International Documentary and Best Cinema Documentary. He has also been honored with a Ron Herring Award by the Mankind Project USA. Gethin has been involved in men's work for over a decade and has staffed group therapy retreats at Folsom Prison with Inside Circles and Massachusetts Correctional Institution at Norfolk with the Jericho Circle. 

Some of the areas to cover:

1.  I would love for you to share some of your journey. How did you get into the work that you now do?
2.  How did the film The Work come about?
3.  What for you were some of the gold from filming The Work?
4.  What were some of the challenges?
5.  It is six years since the film came out, what was the response to the film?
6.  How was filming Renzo Gracie: Legacy?
7.  How long did you film for?
8.  What did you learn and what was some of the gold?
9.  What were the challenges of filming this documentary?

To learn more about Gethin's work please visit: https://www.allkings.org/our-team/blog-post-title-one-2aw8j-actp8

• Or his IMDB page: https://www.imdb.com/name/nm0017634/?ref_=tt_ov_dr

---

Piers is an author and a men's transformational coach and therapist who works mainly with trauma, boarding school issues, addictions and relationship problems.

He also runs online men's groups for ex-boarders, retreats and a podcast called An Evolving Man.

He is also the author of How to Survive and Thrive in Challenging Times. To purchase Piers first book: https://www.amazon.co.uk/How-Survive-Thrive-Challenging-Times/dp/B088T5L251/ref=sr_1_1?dchild=1&keywords=piers+cross&qid=1609869608&sr=8-1

For more videos please visit: http://youtube.com/pierscross

For FB: https://www.facebook.com/pierscrosspublic

For Piers' website and a free training How To Find Peace In Everyday Life: https://www.piers-cross.com/community

Many blessings,

Piers Cross

http://piers-cross.com/

Today I have a fascinating conversation with Shahid Van Helden talking about tantra, sex, porn addiction and intimacy.

He also talks about presence and the three things that we need to do as men to become more present.

He also share some ideas for how we improve our love-making and our sex lives.

A really fascinating conversation.

---

Shahid Van Helden is a men's group, men's & couples' retreat and Tantra facilitator. Shahid has also trained in Tantra Massage & Bodywork. He runs couples retreats with his beloved, Shashi Solluna.

Some areas to talk about:

1. I would love for you to share some of your journey. How did you get into the work you now do?
2. Could you please talk a little about Tantra. What is it?
3. If you are a man who has been through trauma or a dysfunctional upbringing especially regarding sex, how do we start to heal that?
4. It is said in personal development circles that it is women who do most of the inner work. How do we as men step up and start to examine our inner workings?
5. How do we cultivate presence?
6. How can we as men be vulnerable and not collapse?
7. Some men feel that they are not good enough especially regarding sex. What would you advise someone who comes to you with this problem?
8. Dissociation. Through trauma a man comes to you who has dissociated, especially in sex. They're always in their head. What are some of the practices that you teach men to be more embodied?
9. What do you suggest for men who have no ability for intimacy and no perceptible sex drive?
10. How do people learn more about your work or reach out?

To learn more about Shahid's work please visit: https://www.masteringtheartoflove.com/

Or to learn more about his couples work with his partner Shashi Solluna please visit: https://www.thetantriccouple.com/ or https://www.livetantra.com/

---

Piers is an author and a men's transformational coach and therapist who works mainly with trauma, boarding school issues, addictions and relationship problems.

He also runs online men's groups for ex-boarders, retreats and a podcast called An Evolving Man.

He is also the author of How to Survive and Thrive in Challenging Times. To purchase Piers first book: https://www.amazon.co.uk/How-Survive-Thrive-Challenging-Times/dp/B088T5L251/ref=sr_1_1?dchild=1&keywords=piers+cross&qid=1609869608&sr=8-1

For more videos please visit: http://youtube.com/pierscross

For FB: https://www.facebook.com/pierscrosspublic

For Piers' website and a free training How To Find Peace In Everyday Life: https://www.piers-cross.com/community

Many blessings,

Piers Cross

http://piers-cross.com/

 What are the 3 types of trauma? 

Today I talk about the most well know type trauma. 

This comes from the work of Gabor Mate who is one of the world's leading voices on trauma. 

The first one is shock trauma. 

What is shock trauma? 

I give some examples of what shock trauma is and I also quote some of the words of Bessel Van der Kolk from The Body Keeps the Score and Peter Levine from his book Healing Trauma. 

Next week I will talk about developmental trauma and the week after that about attachment trauma. Any questions please do let me know. 

Warm regards, Piers 

---

Piers is an author and a men's transformational coach and therapist who works mainly with trauma, boarding school issues, addictions and relationship problems.

He also runs online men's groups for ex-boarders, retreats and a podcast called An Evolving Man.

He is also the author of How to Survive and Thrive in Challenging Times. To purchase Piers first book: https://www.amazon.co.uk/How-Survive-Thrive-Challenging-Times/dp/B088T5L251/ref=sr_1_1?dchild=1&keywords=piers+cross&qid=1609869608&sr=8-1

For more videos please visit: http://youtube.com/pierscross

For FB: https://www.facebook.com/pierscrosspublic

For Piers' website and a free training How To Find Peace In Everyday Life: https://www.piers-cross.com/community

Many blessings,

Piers Cross

http://piers-cross.com/

 What are the 3 types of trauma? 

Today I talk about developmental trauma. 

This comes from the work of Gabor Mate who is one of the world's leading voices on trauma. 

Last week I talked about shock trauma. 

This week I am talking about developmental trauma. What is it? 

I give some examples of what this type of trauma is and I also quote some of the words of Nick Duffell and Thurstine Basset in Trauma, Abandonment and Privilege, Prof Joy Schaverien from her 2021 paper called Boarding School Syndrome Revisited and Pete Walker's Complex PTSD. 

I talk about how boarding school syndrome is a developmental trauma.

Next week I will talk about attachment trauma. Any questions please do let me know. 

Warm regards, 

Piers

---

Piers is an author and a men's transformational coach and therapist who works mainly with trauma, boarding school issues, addictions and relationship problems.

He also runs online men's groups for ex-boarders, retreats and a podcast called An Evolving Man.

He is also the author of How to Survive and Thrive in Challenging Times. To purchase Piers first book: https://www.amazon.co.uk/How-Survive-Thrive-Challenging-Times/dp/B088T5L251/ref=sr_1_1?dchild=1&keywords=piers+cross&qid=1609869608&sr=8-1

For more videos please visit: http://youtube.com/pierscross

For FB: https://www.facebook.com/pierscrosspublic

For Piers' website and a free training How To Find Peace In Everyday Life: https://www.piers-cross.com/community

Many blessings,

Piers Cross

http://piers-cross.com/

What are the 3 types of trauma? T

Today I talk about attachment trauma. This comes from the work of Gabor Mate who is one of the world's leading voices on trauma. 

Last week I talked about developmental trauma https://youtu.be/ilTX9M0KExk and the week before that I talked about shock trauma https://youtu.be/xE7EOR_F_qE. 

This week I am talking about attachment trauma. What is it? 

I give some examples of what this type of trauma is and I also quote some of the words of Gabor Mate and from Diane Poole Heller and her book The Power of Attachment. 

I also talk how attachment trauma links into boarding school syndrome and how the breaking of attachment from our homes and our parents to go to boarding school is a trauma. Any questions please do let me know. 

Warm regards, Piers

---

Piers is an author and a men's transformational coach and therapist who works mainly with trauma, boarding school issues, addictions and relationship problems.

He also runs online men's groups for ex-boarders, retreats and a podcast called An Evolving Man.

He is also the author of How to Survive and Thrive in Challenging Times. To purchase Piers first book: https://www.amazon.co.uk/How-Survive-Thrive-Challenging-Times/dp/B088T5L251/ref=sr_1_1?dchild=1&keywords=piers+cross&qid=1609869608&sr=8-1

For more videos please visit: http://youtube.com/pierscross

For FB: https://www.facebook.com/pierscrosspublic

For Piers' website and a free training How To Find Peace In Everyday Life: https://www.piers-cross.com/community

Many blessings,

Piers Cross

http://piers-cross.com/

 Trish Brennan is the CEO & Principal Trainer of Leading Edge Communication. She coaches women who want to have more confidence in their relationships, be more assertive, establish healthy boundaries and radically improve the quality of their lives through enhanced communication and relationship skills. She is also the author of The Straight Talk.

1. I would love for you to share some of your journey. How did you get into the work you now do?
2. What is you clarion call to men and women?
3. Could you tell us a bit about your Boys To Men work?
4. What do you feel is the healing work that men need to do?
5. What is the nature of patriarchal society?
6. Joint responsibility – what can both men and women do?
7. Emotions – what is the importance of men and women connecting to their emotions?
8. “Change should fall on adult men with power.” Jackson Katz
9. How do women crack open the hearts of their men?
10. How do people find out more about your work?

To learn more about Trish's work please visit: www.leadingedgecommunication.com/ www.thestraighttalkblog.com / www.ifthisisabuse.com

Or to buy her book: https://www.amazon.co.uk/Straight-Talk-Exactly-Control-Precious/dp/B0C2RF57TB/ref=sr_1_1?keywords=the+straight+talk+trish+brennan&qid=1684166022&sprefix=trish+brenn%2Caps%2C871&sr=8-1 

---

Piers is an author and a men's transformational coach and therapist who works mainly with trauma, boarding school issues, addictions and relationship problems.

He also runs online men's groups for ex-boarders, retreats and a podcast called An Evolving Man.

He is also the author of How to Survive and Thrive in Challenging Times. To purchase Piers first book: https://www.amazon.co.uk/How-Survive-Thrive-Challenging-Times/dp/B088T5L251/ref=sr_1_1?dchild=1&keywords=piers+cross&qid=1609869608&sr=8-1

For more videos please visit: http://youtube.com/pierscross

For FB: https://www.facebook.com/pierscrosspublic

For Piers' website and a free training How To Find Peace In Everyday Life: https://www.piers-cross.com/community

Many blessings,

Piers Cross

http://piers-cross.com/

 Last weekend I returned to London again. 

While I was there I found myself walking past, by synchronicity, my old workplace. 

So I recorded these films... 

I went past old pubs I used to drink in, the office I worked in and the realisation of just how close my old workplace was to the original site of my boarding school. 

I also had the insight that being in the City, the financial sector, was very similar to being at boarding school - we were told not to show our emotions, there was an ethos of overworking and a split between home and work. 

Today I share some of the films I recorded. 

Any questions please do let me know. 

Warm regards, Piers 

---

Piers is an author and a men's transformational coach and therapist who works mainly with trauma, boarding school issues, addictions and relationship problems.

He also runs online men's groups for ex-boarders, retreats and a podcast called An Evolving Man.

He is also the author of How to Survive and Thrive in Challenging Times. To purchase Piers first book: https://www.amazon.co.uk/How-Survive-Thrive-Challenging-Times/dp/B088T5L251/ref=sr_1_1?dchild=1&keywords=piers+cross&qid=1609869608&sr=8-1

For more videos please visit: http://youtube.com/pierscross

For FB: https://www.facebook.com/pierscrosspublic

For Piers' website and a free training How To Find Peace In Everyday Life: https://www.piers-cross.com/community

Many blessings,

Piers Cross

http://piers-cross.com/

On today's show I am talking about prisons, men managing distress, boarding schools and our leaders with one of the UK's leading forensic clinical psychologists.

It's a fascinating discussion about Dr Murphy's work in the UK's secure prison units working with some of the most dangerous men. What did she learn? How did she teach these men to move from anger and violence to grief and healing? How did help these men to feel again?

We also talk about trauma and its relationship to violence and the prison system. We also talk about boarding school and how prison offers similarities to boarding school life and boarding school syndrome. We talk about how our leaders have been to boarding school and the impact that might have on the people they serve.

---

Dr Naomi Murphy is one of the UK’s most respected forensic clinical psychologists. Recently appointed Honorary Professor of Psychology at Nottingham Trent University, she qualified as a clinical psychologist in 1997 and as a consultant clinical psychologist in 2003. 

She is also an accredited sensorimotor psychotherapist, NeurOptimal brain trainer and Safe & Sound Provider. She is also the co-editor of Treating Personality Disorder and co-host of the podcast The Locked Up Living Podcast.

Some of the areas that we talk about:

1. I would love for you to share some of your journey. How did you arrive at the work that you now do?
2. I would love for you to speak about trauma. What is it and how does it impact us psychologically?
3. What about trust? Do men trust? How do we cultivate more trust in our lives as men?
4. Women seem to be engaged in change whereas men seem to be more relectant to change. Could you please talk about that?
5. Vulnerability. Could you talk about how the prisoners changed once they started to be vulnerable?
6. Trauma informed society. We can't be trauma informed if we don't feel safe. Please speak to that?
7. The importance of sharing emotions
8. Could you please talk about what you understand about boarding school and how it might impact people. What if these people were the leaders of the country?
9. What's the research about boys being more needy than girls? How might this impact them if they are separated at a young age and put into an institution?
10. Why do men struggle so much?
11. Could the prison system in the UK and US be the way it is because the leaders of the country spent years in similar institutions? Whereas where there are few boarding schools like Finland or Sweden, the prison system is very kind and generative.
12. Where do people find out more about your work?

To find out more about Dr Murphy's work please visit: https://octopuspsychology.com

---

Piers is an author and a men's transformational coach and therapist who works mainly with trauma, boarding school issues, addictions and relationship problems.

He also runs online men's groups for ex-boarders, retreats and a podcast called An Evolving Man.

He is also the author of How to Survive and Thrive in Challenging Times. To purchase Piers first book: https://www.amazon.co.uk/How-Survive-Thrive-Challenging-Times/dp/B088T5L251/ref=sr_1_1?dchild=1&keywords=piers+cross&qid=1609869608&sr=8-1

For more videos please visit: http://youtube.com/pierscross

For FB: https://www.facebook.com/pierscrosspublic

For Piers' website and a free training How To Find Peace In Everyday Life: https://www.piers-cross.com/community

Many blessings,

Piers Cross

http://piers-cross.com/

On Saturday last weekend I went back to the site of my childhood trauma.

I went back to my boarding school.

It was the first time that I have been back inside the school for 25 years.

Today I offer some reflections for how it was.

How did I find it? Was it really hard? Or was it harder than I was expecting?

I talk about visiting the dining hall, the chapel, the site of the death of my friend, and the old boarding house.

What had changed? And what seemed to still be the same?

I also talk about what I learned about going back. 

To be honest it brought old patterns up for me. What were they and what would I do differently if I went again?

Any questions please do let me know,

Warm regards,

Piers

---

Piers is an author and a men's transformational coach and therapist who works mainly with trauma, boarding school issues, addictions and relationship problems.

He also runs online men's groups for ex-boarders, retreats and a podcast called An Evolving Man.

He is also the author of How to Survive and Thrive in Challenging Times. To purchase Piers first book: https://www.amazon.co.uk/How-Survive-Thrive-Challenging-Times/dp/B088T5L251/ref=sr_1_1?dchild=1&keywords=piers+cross&qid=1609869608&sr=8-1

For more videos please visit: http://youtube.com/pierscross

For FB: https://www.facebook.com/pierscrosspublic

For Piers' website and a free training How To Find Peace In Everyday Life: https://www.piers-cross.com/community

Many blessings,

Piers Cross

http://piers-cross.com/

Today I am looking at betrayal trauma and the work of Jennifer Freyd PhD. 

What is betrayal trauma? 

And why is betrayal the key element that makes an experience become traumatic especially in childhood? 

I read some of the words of Joy Schaverien PhD and Nick Duffell from his book Wounded Leaders.

 They talk about how for some boarding school is a betrayal. 

So if it is a betrayal is it then a trauma? 

Some exploration of betrayal trauma and the journal article: https://journals.sagepub.com/doi/10.1177/0886260511421672 Any thoughts or reflections please do let me know. 

Warm regards, Piers 

---

Piers is an author and a men's transformational coach and therapist who works mainly with trauma, boarding school issues, addictions and relationship problems.

He also runs online men's groups for ex-boarders, retreats and a podcast called An Evolving Man.

He is also the author of How to Survive and Thrive in Challenging Times. To purchase Piers first book: https://www.amazon.co.uk/How-Survive-Thrive-Challenging-Times/dp/B088T5L251/ref=sr_1_1?dchild=1&keywords=piers+cross&qid=1609869608&sr=8-1

For more videos please visit: http://youtube.com/pierscross

For FB: https://www.facebook.com/pierscrosspublic

For Piers' website and a free training How To Find Peace In Everyday Life: https://www.piers-cross.com/community

Many blessings,

Piers Cross

http://piers-cross.com/

Today's episode we ask the question, "Is it time to abolish boarding schools? 

Psychotherapist, Richard Hughes talks about his own experience of boarding school and working with clients.

Why have boarding schools not changed?

Why do boarding schools not offer “the love and care a child needs?”

What can we do to start changing the system?

---

Richard Hughes is a qualified and accredited psychotherapist with the UK Council for Psychotherapy. He specialises in helping people in many areas. Some of these include: relationships, anxiety, depression, stress, and boarding school issues.

Some areas to talk about:

1. I would love for you to share some of your journey. How did you get into the work you now do?
2. Could you please talk a little about attachment. What is good enough attachment?
3. You wrote an amazing article called Time to Abolish Boarding Schools on your blog. I would love you to talk more about that. What drew you to writing it?
4. What is the importance of the first day and night at boarding school, especially from an attachment lens? How was your first day/ night?
5. What were some of the survival methods that you employed at school? How did you start to undo these patterns and begin the healing journey?
6. How does boarding school impact our relationships with women? Could you describe a bit of how the school responded to the girls in the school?
7. “Boarding schools do not offer the love and care a child needs” Could you talk more about that please?
8. Boarding schools claim to be a safe and secure environment. What do you feel?
9. How does boarding school effect people later in adult life? What are some of the symptoms that you have seen?
10. So many of our leaders have been to boarding school. How might this effect how they run their businesses or government? What can we do to change this?
11. Could you please talk about food and nourishment? What was the food like for you at Prep school and how did that impact you?
12. How do people find out more about you?

To find out more about Richard please visit: https://www.richardhughestherapy.com/

To read Richard's blog please visit: https://www.richardhughestherapy.com/post/time-to-end-boarding-schools

---

Piers is an author and a men's transformational coach and therapist who works mainly with trauma, boarding school issues, addictions and relationship problems.

He also runs online men's groups for ex-boarders, retreats and a podcast called An Evolving Man.

He is also the author of How to Survive and Thrive in Challenging Times. To purchase Piers first book: https://www.amazon.co.uk/How-Survive-Thrive-Challenging-Times/dp/B088T5L251/ref=sr_1_1?dchild=1&keywords=piers+cross&qid=1609869608&sr=8-1

For more videos please visit: http://youtube.com/pierscross

For FB: https://www.facebook.com/pierscrosspublic

For Piers' website and a free training How To Find Peace In Everyday Life: https://www.piers-cross.com/community

Many blessings,

Piers Cross

http://piers-cross.com/

Trauma and relationships. How does trauma impact your relationship? And what can you do?

Today I am speaking with one of the world's leading teachers in the world of relationships, sexuality and trauma. 

Shashi Solluna is the author of Tantra Made Easy and teaches around the world at festivals and on retreats. 

What a fascinating discussion with a woman who studied psychology at Oxford University and went to boarding school at sixth form. How does trauma affect our relationships and what can we do to heal?

---

Shashi Solluna is the author of "Tantra Made Easy" published by Hay House. She has been teaching for nearly two decades and runs teacher trainings as well as being part of a team creating international tantra festivals. She is currently making a feature documentary Sex to Spirit following one man on his life-changing journey into Tantra. 

She originally trained in psychology at Oxford University and offers training courses globally about trauma, tantra and relationships.

Some areas to talk about:

1. I would love for you to share some of your journey. How did you get into the work you now do?
2. Could you please talk a little about Tantra. What is it?
3. Why is the topic of trauma in relationships so important?
4. What do you define trauma as?
5. How can a couple work through trauma?
6. How might trauma reveal itself in intimacy?
7. Could our intimate relationships be one of the best places to heal our trauma?
8. Can you please explain why it is that we get triggered by the people we're closest to?
9. How do you know if you've had a trauma if you don't remember it?
10. How can you tell the difference between the freeze response and surrender?
11. I've noticed that a lot of people with trauma/ complex trauma struggle to stay present. How does someone who has been trained to not be present, become present again, especially in sex?
12. Could you speak a little about dissociation as well please? What can we do if we are often dissociated? How to move back into the body?
13. How do people learn more about your work or reach out?

To learn more about Shashi's work please visit: https://www.shashi-solluna.com

Or to learn more about her couples work with her partner Shahid Van Helden (who I interviewed here: ) please visit: https://www.thetantriccouple.com/ or https://www.livetantra.com/

---

Piers is an author and a men's transformational coach and therapist who works mainly with trauma, boarding school issues, addictions and relationship problems.

He also runs online men's groups for ex-boarders, retreats and a podcast called An Evolving Man.

He is also the author of How to Survive and Thrive in Challenging Times. To purchase Piers first book: https://www.amazon.co.uk/How-Survive-Thrive-Challenging-Times/dp/B088T5L251/ref=sr_1_1?dchild=1&keywords=piers+cross&qid=1609869608&sr=8-1

For more videos please visit: http://youtube.com/pierscross

For FB: https://www.facebook.com/pierscrosspublic

For Piers' website and a free training How To Find Peace In Everyday Life: https://www.piers-cross.com/community

Many blessings,

Piers Cross

http://piers-cross.com/

Today I wanted to share some reflections about Boris Johnson. 

With the resignation of Boris Johnson last week I wanted to share some thoughts from a psychological perspective.

Why is Boris the way he is?

Could any of his behaviours be due to childhood trauma and specifically Boarding School Syndrome? 

Here I quote from the likes of Prof Joy Schaverien, Dr Judith Herman, Nick Duffell, Peter Levine PhD, Jennifer Freyd PhD and Richard Grannon. 

What is Narcisstic Personality Disorder (NPD)? And is Boris a narcissist? 

And what can we do to find leaders who are there to support us? 

Any questions please do let me know, Best regards, Piers 

---

Piers is an author and a men's transformational coach and therapist who works mainly with trauma, boarding school issues, addictions and relationship problems.

He also runs online men's groups for ex-boarders, retreats and a podcast called An Evolving Man.

He is also the author of How to Survive and Thrive in Challenging Times. To purchase Piers first book: https://www.amazon.co.uk/How-Survive-Thrive-Challenging-Times/dp/B088T5L251/ref=sr_1_1?dchild=1&keywords=piers+cross&qid=1609869608&sr=8-1

For more videos please visit: http://youtube.com/pierscross

For FB: https://www.facebook.com/pierscrosspublic

For Piers' website and a free training How To Find Peace In Everyday Life: https://www.piers-cross.com/community

Many blessings,

Piers Cross

http://piers-cross.com/

 Today I wanted to offer some reflections about my time as a Novice Buddhist monk.

 Why on earth did I go from working in the finance sector of London to becoming a Buddhist monk? 

What was it like? What are the daily routine like for a Buddhist monk? 

Why did monastic life seem so simliar to boarding school but in a good way? 

What were some of the good things about being a Buddhist monk? 

And what about some of the negatives? 

What were my struggles and my aha moments?

 In this video I talk about what it was like to live as a monastic for 3 years. I talk about my mental health problems and how I tried to commit suicide while I was there. 

I also talk about how healing it was and how it transformed my life. 

Any questions please do let me know. Warm regards, Piers 

---

Piers is an author and a men's transformational coach and therapist who works mainly with trauma, boarding school issues, addictions and relationship problems.

He also runs online men's groups for ex-boarders, retreats and a podcast called An Evolving Man.

He is also the author of How to Survive and Thrive in Challenging Times. To purchase Piers first book: https://www.amazon.co.uk/How-Survive-Thrive-Challenging-Times/dp/B088T5L251/ref=sr_1_1?dchild=1&keywords=piers+cross&qid=1609869608&sr=8-1

For more videos please visit: http://youtube.com/pierscross

For FB: https://www.facebook.com/pierscrosspublic

For Piers' website and a free training How To Find Peace In Everyday Life: https://www.piers-cross.com/community

Many blessings,

Piers Cross

http://piers-cross.com/

Today I offer some reflections about slowing down and taking a break. 

If you have been through some form of trauma then the chances are you are pretty hard on yourself. 

You work hard and you are often giving yourelf a hard time. 

Today I suggest that what is really useful is to slow down and to stop. 

To take a break and sit in your garden. 

Time to be still, meditate and take care of yourself. 

Bless you, you are amazing, 

Warm regards, Piers 

---

Piers is an author and a men's transformational coach and therapist who works mainly with trauma, boarding school issues, addictions and relationship problems.

He also runs online men's groups for ex-boarders, retreats and a podcast called An Evolving Man.

He is also the author of How to Survive and Thrive in Challenging Times. To purchase Piers first book: https://www.amazon.co.uk/How-Survive-Thrive-Challenging-Times/dp/B088T5L251/ref=sr_1_1?dchild=1&keywords=piers+cross&qid=1609869608&sr=8-1

For more videos please visit: http://youtube.com/pierscross

For FB: https://www.facebook.com/pierscrosspublic

For Piers' website and a free training How To Find Peace In Everyday Life: https://www.piers-cross.com/community

Many blessings,

Piers Cross

http://piers-cross.com/

How does childhood trauma impact our relationships? How might these symptoms of childhood trauma show up in our lives?

On today's podcast I am speaking with a leading counsellor and psychotherapist about just this topic. Wendy Capewell shares some of her own experiences and stories to help illuminate how impactful trauma is in our lives and how it effects your relationships.

---

Wendy Capewell is a fully qualified BACP Accredited Counsellor and Psychotherapist, with over 18 years of professional experience. She specialises in helping people with childhood trauma, anxiety, stress and relationships and was a volunteer Counsellor at a Rape and Sexual Abuse Centre for 5 years. She is the author of the book Surviving to Thriving in Relationships.

Questions to ask:

1. I would love for you to share how you got into the work that you now do?
2. Could you please talk about childhood trauma. What is it and how does it impact firstly a child and then the adult they become?
3. How does trauma show up in relationships?
4. If we are struggling in relationships what are some of the things that you teach your clients to improve their relationships?
5. How do we improve communication in a relationship? What are some of the keys to good communication?
6. What can we do if we struggle to connect to our emotions in relationships? How do we learn to reconnect to our emotional household?
7. Could you please speak to anxiety. What is the underlying cause of anxiety? What are some of the key ways you teach others to help them to manage their anxiety?
8. Could you please talk to strategies to protect ourselves from being vulnerable?
9. How do people find out more about your work?

#relationships #trauma #childhoodtrauma

To reach out to Wendy please visit her website: https://www.wendycapewell.co.uk/

To buy her book please visit: https://www.amazon.co.uk/Surviving-Thriving-Romantic-Relationship-Reignite-ebook/dp/B01MRZDEJB/ref=sr_1_2?crid=2Z6O93C7XGH4M&keywords=wendy+capewell&qid=1686745415&sprefix=wendy+capewell%2Caps%2C636&sr=8-2

And to listen to her podcast please go to: https://www.amazon.co.uk/Love-Listen-Talk-Repeat-Podcast-with-Wendy-Capewell/dp/B08JK2D3NL/ref=sr_1_1?keywords=Wendy+Capewell&qid=1686745457&sr=8-1

For the Feeling Wheel: https://allthefeelz.app/feeling-wheel/  

And the Ted X Talk with Jane Evans: https://youtu.be/qKlzd-H2X9w

---

Piers is an author and a men's transformational coach and therapist who works mainly with trauma, boarding school issues, addictions and relationship problems.

He also runs online men's groups for ex-boarders, retreats and a podcast called An Evolving Man.

He is also the author of How to Survive and Thrive in Challenging Times. To purchase Piers first book: https://www.amazon.co.uk/How-Survive-Thrive-Challenging-Times/dp/B088T5L251/ref=sr_1_1?dchild=1&keywords=piers+cross&qid=1609869608&sr=8-1

For more videos please visit: http://youtube.com/pierscross

For FB: https://www.facebook.com/pierscrosspublic

For Piers' website and a free training How To Find Peace In Everyday Life: https://www.piers-cross.com/community

Many blessings,

Piers Cross

http://piers-cross.com/

If you have been through trauma the chances are that you have a very powerful and often negative inner critic.

This is one of the ways that we cope with trauma.

Our inner critic comes online to protect us.

And on one level it did protect us.

The question is does it protect us still or does it keep us in our trauma?

This same voice can be so hateful, cricitcal and blaming of ourselves.

Especially when we are triggered, tired, unwell or someone is criticising us.

So today I wanted to share some of the teachings of Pete Walker in his book Complex PTSD or CPTSD and how he recommends that we challenge the inner critic.

These are techniques that I have used for many decades to great effect.

Any questions please do let me know,

Warm regards,

Piers

---

Piers is an author and a men's transformational coach and therapist who works mainly with trauma, boarding school issues, addictions and relationship problems.

He also runs online men's groups for ex-boarders, retreats and a podcast called An Evolving Man.

He is also the author of How to Survive and Thrive in Challenging Times. To purchase Piers first book: https://www.amazon.co.uk/How-Survive-Thrive-Challenging-Times/dp/B088T5L251/ref=sr_1_1?dchild=1&keywords=piers+cross&qid=1609869608&sr=8-1

For more videos please visit: http://youtube.com/pierscross

For FB: https://www.facebook.com/pierscrosspublic

For Piers' website and a free training How To Find Peace In Everyday Life: https://www.piers-cross.com/community

Many blessings,

Piers Cross

http://piers-cross.com/

What does neuroscience say about trauma? And what does childhood trauma look like through the lens of polyvagal theory and subconscious beliefs?

Today I am speaking with leading coach and trauma expert, Jane Evans to talk about these subjects. She shares some of her journey working with children and in fostering and the impact of childhood trauma. She also shares how we can start to heal from this trauma.

---

 Jane Evans is the co-creator of Healing Together, a multi-award-winning social enterprise supporting young people & families to access early trauma-informed help.

Jane is known internationally for her work with parents and children and is an expert in childhood trauma. She’s also the author of a number of books which help adults explore and discuss difficult issues with children including one on domestic abuse called 'How Are You Feeling Today Baby Bear?'

Questions to ask:

1. I would love for you to share how you got into the work that you now do?
2. Could you please talk about childhood trauma. What is it and how does it impact firstly a child and then the adult they become?
3. Could you please speak about the brain and how childhood trauma and abuse affects the brain? What does neuroscience says about trauma?
4. How might these patterns show up in adulthood?
5. I would love for you to share some of your experiences of fostering. How does trauma impact children in care?
6. Could you please talk about anxiety and childhood trauma? Why is that many people who had childhood trauma struggle with anxiety?
7. What are some of the techniques for dealing with childhood trauma?
8. What about for anxiety? What are some of the techniques that you have found most powerful?
9. How has Covid and lockdown affected children?
10. A lot of the work I do is around boarding school and the trauma it creates. Many of our leaders went to boarding school. How might that impact their decision making in your opinion?
11. How do people find out more about your work?

#fostering #polyvagaltheory #trauma #childhoodtrauma #anxiety

To reach out to Jane please visit her website: https://thejaneevans.com/

On Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/Parentingbeyondanxiety

On Twitter: https://twitter.com/janeparenting2

To buy her books please visit: https://www.amazon.co.uk/Little-Meerkats-Big-Panic-Learning/dp/1785927035/ref=sr_1_1?keywords=jane+evans&qid=1688653676&sr=8-1

And to watch her Ted X Talk: https://youtu.be/qKlzd-H2X9w

---

Piers is an author and a men's transformational coach and therapist who works mainly with trauma, boarding school issues, addictions and relationship problems.

He also runs online men's groups for ex-boarders, retreats and a podcast called An Evolving Man.

He is also the author of How to Survive and Thrive in Challenging Times. To purchase Piers first book: https://www.amazon.co.uk/How-Survive-Thrive-Challenging-Times/dp/B088T5L251/ref=sr_1_1?dchild=1&keywords=piers+cross&qid=1609869608&sr=8-1

For more videos please visit: http://youtube.com/pierscross

For FB: https://www.facebook.com/pierscrosspublic

For Piers' website and a free training How To Find Peace In Everyday Life: https://www.piers-cross.com/community

Many blessings,

Piers Cross

http://piers-cross.com/

 "I can't do this any more", "This is too much", "Life is too hard" and "I want out". 

What can we do when we start to feel this way? 

What can you do when life just seems too intense? 

I talk about 5 ways of dealing with these feelings. 

1. Come back to the basics - the fundamentals of eating, moving and sleeping
2. Work with the traffic light system of Brian Cain. Am I good and feeling good or is it red and time to shift how I feel? 
3. Put your phone down. We are often overwhelmed by the amount of data we are bombarded with. Turn your phone off at 6pm and turn back on at 9am 
4. Iceberg Technique. See your younger wounded self. Where have you felt this same feeling before. 
5. Inner critic. Listen to the words you are telling yourself. Is it kind and benevolent words like, "You can do this!" "You've got this!" or "You're a piece of crap!" I share a technique I use for changing the voice around. 

Next podcast is going live on Friday about Childhood Trauma and Polyvagal Theory with Jane Evans: https://youtu.be/VXkxKHUlOCg 

And last week's podcast with Wendy Capewell is now live about Childhood Trauma, Relationships and Communication: https://youtu.be/r9qqCYStUvw 

Any questions please do let me know, 

Warm regards, Piers 

---

Piers is an author and a men's transformational coach and therapist who works mainly with trauma, boarding school issues, addictions and relationship problems.

He also runs online men's groups for ex-boarders, retreats and a podcast called An Evolving Man.

He is also the author of How to Survive and Thrive in Challenging Times. To purchase Piers first book: https://www.amazon.co.uk/How-Survive-Thrive-Challenging-Times/dp/B088T5L251/ref=sr_1_1?dchild=1&keywords=piers+cross&qid=1609869608&sr=8-1

For more videos please visit: http://youtube.com/pierscross

For FB: https://www.facebook.com/pierscrosspublic

For Piers' website and a free training How To Find Peace In Everyday Life: https://www.piers-cross.com/community

Many blessings,

Piers Cross

http://piers-cross.com/

Today I am delighted to be speaking to Alan Clements. Alan, who is an author and an ex-Buddhist monk talks today about his journeys as a monastic in war-torn Burma now Myanmar.

He shares some of the wisdom he learned living in the jungles of Sri Lanka and Burma and his work as a journalist interviewing many of the political prisoner of Burma.

He also shares some of the insights into war, extreme conflict and trauma. A very enlightening conversation.

---

Alan Clements is a satirist, performing artist, former Buddhist monk, and investigative journalist in areas of war and extreme conflict. He is also the author of numerous books, a spoken word album, and the subject of a feature documentary film ’Spiritually Incorrect'. His latest book is 'Extinction Rated: An auto fictional satire about good and evil'.

Some areas to talk about:

1. I would love for you to share some of your journey. How did you get into the work you now do?
2. Could you please speak to the experiences of trauma that you have been through in your life? What have you seen, experienced and learned?
3. Could you talk about some of the spiritual insights you had as a monk and in your life?
4. Could you please speak to the mindset of totalitarianism? What is radical cohersion?
5. Could you please speak about meeting and interviewing Aung San Suu Kyi?
6. Genocide – what did you learn about what you saw in Burma and Srebrenica?
7. Could you please talk about the Buddha's Four Noble Truth. Why is this such an important teaching?
8. How do people learn more about your work or reach out?

To learn more about Alan's work please visit: http://www.worlddharma.com/

Or to buy his books on Amazon please visit: https://www.amazon.co.uk/Alan-Clements/e/B001JRVBBK?ref=sr_ntt_srch_lnk_2&qid=1687192808&sr=8-2

---

Piers is an author and a men's transformational coach and therapist who works mainly with trauma, boarding school issues, addictions and relationship problems.

He also runs online men's groups for ex-boarders, retreats and a podcast called An Evolving Man.

He is also the author of How to Survive and Thrive in Challenging Times. To purchase Piers first book: https://www.amazon.co.uk/How-Survive-Thrive-Challenging-Times/dp/B088T5L251/ref=sr_1_1?dchild=1&keywords=piers+cross&qid=1609869608&sr=8-1

For more videos please visit: http://youtube.com/pierscross

For FB: https://www.facebook.com/pierscrosspublic

For Piers' website and a free training How To Find Peace In Everyday Life: https://www.piers-cross.com/community

Many blessings,

Piers Cross

http://piers-cross.com/

Today I wanted to share some reflections about childhood trauma and dissociation.

In this video I share some of my thoughts about how as a result of childhood trauma we dissociate.

I quote from the work of Bessel Van der Kolk and his book the Body Keeps The Score and from the other classic book on trauma, Trauma and Recovery by Dr Judith Herman.

I talk about some of my own experiences of why and how I dissociated and what I did to start feeling again.

I talk about some of the following ideas for recovery:

• Slowing down
• Be creative
• Connect with the right side of the brain – move from analytical to feeling/ intuitive
• Do less not more
• Physical activities like massage, yoga and tai chi.

Any questions please do let me know.

For this Friday's podcast with Alan Clements to talk about trauma and his journey of healing as a Buddhist monk in the jungles of Burma/ Myanmar please visit here: https://youtu.be/rXWsPdSqnGk

And for last Friday's episode with Jane Evans talking about Childhood Trauma and Polyvagal Theory please visit here: https://youtu.be/VXkxKHUlOCg

#dissociation #trauma #childhoodtrauma #dissociationrecovery

---

Piers is an author and a men's transformational coach and therapist who works mainly with trauma, boarding school issues, addictions and relationship problems.

He also runs online men's groups for ex-boarders, retreats and a podcast called An Evolving Man.

He is also the author of How to Survive and Thrive in Challenging Times. To purchase Piers first book: https://www.amazon.co.uk/How-Survive-Thrive-Challenging-Times/dp/B088T5L251/ref=sr_1_1?dchild=1&keywords=piers+cross&qid=1609869608&sr=8-1

For more videos please visit: http://youtube.com/pierscross

For FB: https://www.facebook.com/pierscrosspublic

For Piers' website and a free training How To Find Peace In Everyday Life: https://www.piers-cross.com/community

Many blessings,

Piers Cross

http://piers-cross.com/

Mervin Canham is an addictions specialist and co-leader at The Mankind Project (MKP). The MKP is an organisation aimed at changing the world one man at a time, allowing men to touch a piece of their shadow by being vulnerable with other men. 

Questions he answers:

1. I would love for you to share how you got into the work that you now do?
2. Could you please talk about addictions and addiction recovery. What was your recovery journey like and how did you get clean?
3. What was it like as a boy growing up in South Africa? What were you taught? You mentioned in another podcast that you lost your brother to suicide? How was that?
4. Could you talk about men's work and the Mankind Project? What have you learned from your years in the MKP?
5. Other areas to talk about:
   1. Vulnerability
   2. Crying
   3. Mission and purpose
   4. Confidentiality
   5. I Statements
   6. 10 Day Silent Retreat
   7. Men's circles and sitting in circles
   8. Trauma and addictions
6. How do people find out more about your work?

#addictionrecovery #mankindproject #mensmentalhealth #tears

Connect with Mervin Canham:

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/brothershabazz/
Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/mervin.canham
LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/mervin-canham-16237722b/

---

Piers is an author and a men's transformational coach and therapist who works mainly with trauma, boarding school issues, addictions and relationship problems.

He also runs online men's groups for ex-boarders, retreats and a podcast called An Evolving Man.

He is also the author of How to Survive and Thrive in Challenging Times. To purchase Piers first book: https://www.amazon.co.uk/How-Survive-Thrive-Challenging-Times/dp/B088T5L251/ref=sr_1_1?dchild=1&keywords=piers+cross&qid=1609869608&sr=8-1

For more videos please visit: http://youtube.com/pierscross

For FB: https://www.facebook.com/pierscrosspublic

For Piers' website and a free training How To Find Peace In Everyday Life: https://www.piers-cross.com/community

Many blessings,

Piers Cross

http://piers-cross.com/

On Saturday August 12th 10-5pm I am running an online workshop for ex-boarders (male and female) and therapists around the subject of boarding school and the path of recovery.

The morning session will be talking about some of the leading research into trauma, neglect and boarding school. 

The afternoon session will be exploring some of the leading edge techniques that I use with my clients. 

Some of the areas we will be exploring are:

- What is trauma?

- What are the 3 types of trauma?

- What is hidden trauma?

- Boarding school and trauma and the evidence

- What is boarding school syndrome and how does that impact us as adults?

- Teachings about betrayal trauma. Why could boarding school be a betrayal and how that impacts loss of memory.

- Neglect. Why boarding school could be considered neglect and the impact that has on us.

- Attachment theory. The four different types of attachment. 

- Why many ex-boarders become insecurely attached and what this means.

- The 3 types of Nick Duffell's Strategic Survival Personality, Complier, Rebel and Crushed.

- Strategies for how to become securely attached again

- Teachings and practices for beginning to heal complex trauma and boarding school syndrome.

"As an ex-boarder who was sent away aged eight, I have struggled for many years with feelings of abandonment, alienation, anger, detachment, lack of self-worth, and a nagging sense of victimhood that coloured everything. Piers has given me a marvellous toolkit of methods and mental models that have transformed my life and allowed me to be present in the moment.

"I am extraordinarily grateful for the time we have spent working on my journey together and would encourage anyone struggling with similar issues to contact him." John, UK

Cost: £80

Early bird price ends Saturday 29th July: £65

For more information: https://www.piers-cross.com/boarding-school-syndrome-workshop

---

Piers is an author and a men's transformational coach and therapist who works mainly with trauma, boarding school issues, addictions and relationship problems.

He also runs online men's groups for ex-boarders, retreats and a podcast called An Evolving Man.

He is also the author of How to Survive and Thrive in Challenging Times. To purchase Piers first book: https://www.amazon.co.uk/How-Survive-Thrive-Challenging-Times/dp/B088T5L251/ref=sr_1_1?dchild=1&keywords=piers+cross&qid=1609869608&sr=8-1

For more videos please visit: http://youtube.com/pierscross

For FB: https://www.facebook.com/pierscrosspublic

For Piers' website and a free training How To Find Peace In Everyday Life: https://www.piers-cross.com/community

Many blessings,

Piers Cross

http://piers-cross.com/

What is Boarding School Syndrome?

Today I am offering some reflections about what is boarding school syndrome. 

I often talk about boarding school syndrome in more detailed terms but today I wanted to go back to the basics.

What is it?

And what are the ABCD of boarding school syndrome as coined by Dr Joy Schaverien?

And what about the symptoms of this syndrome? What are they?

I share stories from #PrinceHarry and his time at boarding school and from #BearGrylls and his autobiography, Mud, Sweat and Tears. I also shares some of #StephenFry and his book Moab is my Washpot and even Sir Ranulph Fiennes.

For my upcoming online workshop about Boarding School Syndrome please visit here: https://www.piers-cross.com/boarding-school-trauma-recover-workshop

And please feel free to like this audio and subscribe.

Warm regards,

Piers

#boardingschool #boardingschoolsyndrome #abcd #boardingschoolsurvivors

---

Piers is an author and a men's transformational coach and therapist who works mainly with trauma, boarding school issues, addictions and relationship problems.

He also runs online men's groups for ex-boarders, retreats and a podcast called An Evolving Man.

He is also the author of How to Survive and Thrive in Challenging Times. To purchase Piers first book: https://www.amazon.co.uk/How-Survive-Thrive-Challenging-Times/dp/B088T5L251/ref=sr_1_1?dchild=1&keywords=piers+cross&qid=1609869608&sr=8-1

For more videos please visit: http://youtube.com/pierscross

For FB: https://www.facebook.com/pierscrosspublic

For Piers' website and a free training How To Find Peace In Everyday Life: https://www.piers-cross.com/community

Many blessings,

Piers Cross

http://piers-cross.com/

On today's podcast I am speaking with Yuval Mann about many fascinating areas around sex and relationships.

How do we deal with feelings of sexual shame that we may have carried from childhood?

Yuval talks about the importance of coming back into the body and slowing down.

A really fascinating episode.

---

Yuval Mann is the founder of the Sensual Alchemy School Of Integrated Sexuality and he's spent well over 10,000 hours learning, experimenting, exploring, and teaching people about sex and love. He also hosts the Sensual Alchemy Podcast.

Areas that we explore:

1. I would love for you to share how you got into the work that you now do?
2. Could you please talk about some of your journey through trauma and sex? What did you learn? How did you start to heal your trauma around sexuality?
3. Could you please talk about feelings? How important are they as a compass of raw, evolutionary aliveness?
4. Some areas to talk about:
   1. Sex, Kabbalah and mysticism – sacred sexuality
   2. Porn addiction
   3. Masturbation and self-pleasuring
   4. The belief that sex is a sin
   5. Feeling and emotions
   6. Vulnerability
   7. The importance of coming back to our bodies
   8. The importance of touch – skin hunger
   9. Shame and sex
   10. Dissociation
   11. Self-pleasuring

To find Yuval on Youtube: https://www.youtube.com/@yuvalmann

To visit his website: https://yuvalman.com/

---

Piers is an author and a men's transformational coach and therapist who works mainly with trauma, boarding school issues, addictions and relationship problems.

He also runs online men's groups for ex-boarders, retreats and a podcast called An Evolving Man.

He is also the author of How to Survive and Thrive in Challenging Times. To purchase Piers first book: https://www.amazon.co.uk/How-Survive-Thrive-Challenging-Times/dp/B088T5L251/ref=sr_1_1?dchild=1&keywords=piers+cross&qid=1609869608&sr=8-1

For more videos please visit: http://youtube.com/pierscross

For FB: https://www.facebook.com/pierscrosspublic

For Piers' website and a free training How To Find Peace In Everyday Life: https://www.piers-cross.com/community

Many blessings,

Piers Cross

http://piers-cross.com/

Today I explore the question about child abuse and boarding school. 

I draw upon the writings of David Cameron, ex-Prime Minister of England, who said about his boarding school, "The food was spartan. I lost a stone in weight during a single term. There was one meal that consisted of curry, rice – and maggots. " https://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-7464599/How-David-Camerons-brutal-prep-school-1970s-featured-regular-beatings.html 

And I alsoI draw upon the work of Joy Schaverien and share some thoughts from the NSPCC about neglect. As they say on their website: "Neglect is the ongoing failure to meet a child's basic needs and the most common form of child abuse." https://www.nspcc.org.uk/what-is-child-abuse/types-of-abuse/neglect/ Is boarding school neglect? 

I quote from Bear Grylls, Eddie Izzard and also from the Children and Young People’s Commissioner Scotland, Bruce Adamson who says that "The decision to take a child away from family and community and deprive them of their liberty must only be done when it is in the child’s best interest, as a last resort and for the shortest period possible." https://www.cycj.org.uk/news/aces-distance-resilience/. 

Link to my boarding school trauma and recovery workshop this Saturday 12th August 10-5pm: https://www.piers-cross.com/boarding-school-trauma-recover-workshop 

Any questions please do let me know, 

Warm regards, Piers 

---

Piers is an author and a men's transformational coach and therapist who works mainly with trauma, boarding school issues, addictions and relationship problems.

He also runs online men's groups for ex-boarders, retreats and a podcast called An Evolving Man.

He is also the author of How to Survive and Thrive in Challenging Times. To purchase Piers first book: https://www.amazon.co.uk/How-Survive-Thrive-Challenging-Times/dp/B088T5L251/ref=sr_1_1?dchild=1&keywords=piers+cross&qid=1609869608&sr=8-1

For more videos please visit: http://youtube.com/pierscross

For FB: https://www.facebook.com/pierscrosspublic

For Piers' website and a free training How To Find Peace In Everyday Life: https://www.piers-cross.com/community

Many blessings,

Piers Cross

http://piers-cross.com/

Richard Grannon shares today about narcissism, codependency and his experiences growing up in Portugal and then in boarding school.

How was it for him?

He also talks about his experiences of martial arts and what he learned from training in different martial forms.

He talks about narcissism, codependency, and complex PTSD.

He also shares about George Orwell's 1984 and some of the psychology of that story.

A really fascinating episode, thank you Richard.

---

Richard Grannon is a leading author and one of the internet's leading teachers about narcissism and codependency with over 70 million views on YouTube and 500,000 subscribers.

He is passionate about helping others defend themselves, get back on their feet, and finally free themselves from narcissistic abuse. 

Drawing on numerous forms of psychotherapy, including NLP, cognitive behavioral therapy, zen meditation, psychodynamics, and more, Grannon’s unique methodology offers a direct, practical solution to help narcissistic abuse victims reclaim their self-worth. 

He is the author of the book, A Cult of One.

Some areas to explore:

1. I would love for you to share how you got into the work that you now do?
2. Could you please introduce narcissism and codependency? What are they and how do they show up in people and relationships? (P.14)
3. What are some of the symptoms of narcissism? (P.78)
4. Other areas for exploration:
   1. Your boarding school experiences and how it impacted you.
   2. Boarding schools and narcissism
   3. Narcissism and our leaders
   4. Consumer capitalism and how it teaches us greed and immaturity (P.82)
   5. The psychology of combatives and martial arts – what did martial arts teach you
   6. People pleasers and the 15 traits (P. 63)
   7. The Golden Child (can do no wrong) / Black Sheep (“who cannot do anything right” (P.66)
   8. The difference between PTSD and Complex PTSD
   9. NPD “It was seen as excessive self-admiration rooted in a failure to develop feelings of love outwards in childhood.”) P.66)
   10. Narcissistic abuse
5. How do people find out more about your work?

#narcissism #narcissisticabuse #codependency #trauma #boardingschool

To reach out to Richard please visit her website: https://www.richardgrannon.com/

On Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/richard.grannon.spartanlifecoach

On Twitter: https://twitter.com/GrannonRichard

To buy his books please visit: https://www.amazon.co.uk/Cult-One-Deprogram-Yourself-Narcissistic/dp/B0BSGCR6XR/ref=sr_1_1?keywords=richard+grannon+books&qid=1689696550&sprefix=richard+gr%2Caps%2C221&sr=8-1

---

Piers is an author and a men's transformational coach and therapist who works mainly with trauma, boarding school issues, addictions and relationship problems.

He also runs online men's groups for ex-boarders, retreats and a podcast called An Evolving Man.

He is also the author of How to Survive and Thrive in Challenging Times. To purchase Piers first book: https://www.amazon.co.uk/How-Survive-Thrive-Challenging-Times/dp/B088T5L251/ref=sr_1_1?dchild=1&keywords=piers+cross&qid=1609869608&sr=8-1

For more videos please visit: http://youtube.com/pierscross

For FB: https://www.facebook.com/pierscrosspublic

For Piers' website and a free training How To Find Peace In Everyday Life: https://www.piers-cross.com/community

Many blessings,

Piers Cross

http://piers-cross.com/

 What Is Trauma? 

Today I wanted to share some thoughts from Gabor Mate, Peter Levine and Bessel Van der Kolk on trauma. 

What is it? 

What is the definition of trauma? 

Any questions please do let me know. 

Warm regards, Piers 

---

Piers is an author and a men's transformational coach and therapist who works mainly with trauma, boarding school issues, addictions and relationship problems.

He also runs online men's groups for ex-boarders, retreats and a podcast called An Evolving Man.

He is also the author of How to Survive and Thrive in Challenging Times. To purchase Piers first book: https://www.amazon.co.uk/How-Survive-Thrive-Challenging-Times/dp/B088T5L251/ref=sr_1_1?dchild=1&keywords=piers+cross&qid=1609869608&sr=8-1

For more videos please visit: http://youtube.com/pierscross

For FB: https://www.facebook.com/pierscrosspublic

For Piers' website and a free training How To Find Peace In Everyday Life: https://www.piers-cross.com/community

Many blessings,

Piers Cross

http://piers-cross.com/

Childhood Neglect What is it and why is it so damaging?

Today I offer some reflections about childhood trauma and neglect.

I share some reflections about the work of Bessel Van der Kolk, Gabor Mate and Judith Herman. 

I like to look through the indexes of many authors before I prepare a video or audio. Interestingly, there were no references to neglect in any of the books in the indexes.

Why is it that so few publications talk about neglect?

And yet as Simon Partridge shares: “There is a growing consensus, backed by neuroscience & among traumatologists that neglect is even more damaging to the developing child and its brain than acute abuse. As Camila Batmanghelidjh put it when I asked her once: “Because abuse, however awful, has a beginning, a middle, and an end: for a child, neglect goes on forever.”

I quote from the NSPCC: "Neglect is the ongoing failure to meet a child's basic needs and the most common form of child abuse. A child might be left hungry or dirty, or without proper clothing, shelter, supervision or health care. This can put children and young people in danger. And it can also have long term effects on their physical and mental well-being." NSPCC 

https://www.nspcc.org.uk/what-is-child-abuse/types-of-abuse/neglect/

Physical neglect. A child's basic needs, such as food, clothing or shelter, are not met or they aren't properly supervised or kept safe.

Educational neglect. A parent doesn't ensure their child is given an education.

Emotional neglect. A child doesn't get the nurture and stimulation they need. This could be through ignoring, humiliating, intimidating or isolating them.

Medical neglect. A child isn't given proper health care. This includes dental care and refusing or ignoring medical recommendations.

Neglect changes childhood. Children who've been neglected might experience short-term and long-term effects. These can include:
problems with brain development
taking risks, like running away from home, using drugs and alcohol or breaking the law
getting into dangerous relationships
difficulty with relationships later in life, including with their own children
a higher chance of having mental health problems, including depression.”

I also quote from the work of David Howe, the author of Childhood Abuse and Neglect and a guest on my podcast in a couple of weeks.

Any questions please do let me know,

Warm regards,

Piers

---

Piers is an author and a men's transformational coach and therapist who works mainly with trauma, boarding school issues, addictions and relationship problems.

He also runs online men's groups for ex-boarders, retreats and a podcast called An Evolving Man.

He is also the author of How to Survive and Thrive in Challenging Times. To purchase Piers first book: https://www.amazon.co.uk/How-Survive-Thrive-Challenging-Times/dp/B088T5L251/ref=sr_1_1?dchild=1&keywords=piers+cross&qid=1609869608&sr=8-1

For more videos please visit: http://youtube.com/pierscross

For FB: https://www.facebook.com/pierscrosspublic

For Piers' website and a free training How To Find Peace In Everyday Life: https://www.piers-cross.com/community

Many blessings,

Piers Cross

http://piers-cross.com/

Today I explore the question about childhood neglect and boarding school. I draw upon the writings of David Cameron, ex-Prime Minister of England who said about his boarding school, "The food was spartan. I lost a stone in weight during a single term. There was one meal that consisted of curry, rice – and maggots. " 

https://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-7464599/How-David-Camerons-brutal-prep-school-1970s-featured-regular-beatings.html 

So today I draw upon the work of Joy Schaverien and share some thoughts from the NSPCC about neglect. 

As they say on their website: "Neglect is the ongoing failure to meet a child's basic needs and the most common form of child abuse." https://www.nspcc.org.uk/what-is-child-abuse/types-of-abuse/neglect/ Is boarding school neglect? 

I also quote from Bear Grylls. 

Any questions please do let me know, 

Warm regards, Piers 

--- Piers is an author and a men's transformational coach and therapist who works mainly with trauma, boarding school issues, addictions and relationship problems. He also runs online men's groups, retreats and a podcast called An Evolving Man. He is also the author of How to Survive and Thrive in Challenging Times. To purchase Piers first book: https://www.amazon.co.uk/How-Survive-Thrive-Challenging-Times/dp/B088T5L251/ref=sr_1_1?dchild=1&keywords=piers+cross&qid=1609869608&sr=8-1 For more videos please visit: http://youtube.com/pierscross For FB: https://www.facebook.com/pierscrosspublic For Piers' website and a free training How To Find Peace In Everyday Life: https://www.piers-cross.com/community Many blessings, 

---

Piers is an author and a men's transformational coach and therapist who works mainly with trauma, boarding school issues, addictions and relationship problems.

He also runs online men's groups for ex-boarders, retreats and a podcast called An Evolving Man.

He is also the author of How to Survive and Thrive in Challenging Times. To purchase Piers first book: https://www.amazon.co.uk/How-Survive-Thrive-Challenging-Times/dp/B088T5L251/ref=sr_1_1?dchild=1&keywords=piers+cross&qid=1609869608&sr=8-1

For more videos please visit: http://youtube.com/pierscross

For FB: https://www.facebook.com/pierscrosspublic

For Piers' website and a free training How To Find Peace In Everyday Life: https://www.piers-cross.com/community

Many blessings,

Piers Cross

http://piers-cross.com/

David Howe is a retired Professor and Dean for the School of Social Work and Psychosocial Sciences at the University of East Anglia, Norwich. He is the author of many book in the field of child abuse and neglect, including Attachment Theory for Social Work Practice and Child Abuse and Neglect.

Questions:

1. I would love for you to share some of your journey. How did you get into the work you now do?
2. Could you please speak about neglect. What is it?
3. Could you please talk a little about attachment. What is attachment and how important is good enough attachment for children?
4.  Could you please talk about why researchers are saying “child neglect has a more severe and adverse impact on children’s development than abuse.” (P.111)
5. What are some of the symptoms that might show up to signify a child is being neglected?
6. And might some of the symptoms be for an adult who was neglected as a child?
7.  Below is a quote from your book combined with a quote from a biography. I would love for you to speak to this and about physical neglect: “The broad characteristics of physical neglect are familiar to most childcare practitioners. Nutrition can be poor. Clothes are old or dirty or too big. Bedrooms are sparsely furnished and cold. Children are left unsupervised and under stimulated.” David Howe Child Abuse and Neglect, P.111 “The food was spartan. I lost a stone in weight during a single term (7-8 years old). There was one meal that consisted of curry, rice – and maggots. In the school grounds were woods and a lake where we could play unsupervised in green boiler suits - it is something of a miracle that no one drowned.” DC P.21
8. I would love you to talk about this from your book: “Our evidence supports the hypothesis that the most severe psychological conflicts arise from neglect.” Ney, Fung and Wicket 1994) P.111 
9.  Another quote from your book and a biography: “Take away our affective links with others and we feel vulnerable, alone and distressed.” P.112 “I missed mum and dad terribly, and on the occasional night where I felt this the worst, I remember trying to muffle my tears in my pillow whilst the rest of the dormitory slept.“In fact I was not alone in doing this. Almost everyone cried, but we all learnt to hide it, and those who didn’t were the ones who got bullied.” BG P.58
10. Could you please talk about emotional neglect. What does emotional neglect look like?

#neglect #childabuse #childhoodneglect #trauma

To buy David's books please visit: https://www.amazon.co.uk/s?k=david+howe&crid=3F9I74L1F8SFC&sprefix=david+howe%2Caps%2C263&ref=nb_sb_noss_1

---

Piers is an author and a men's transformational coach and therapist who works mainly with trauma, boarding school issues, addictions and relationship problems.

He also runs online men's groups for ex-boarders, retreats and a podcast called An Evolving Man.

He is also the author of How to Survive and Thrive in Challenging Times. To purchase Piers first book: https://www.amazon.co.uk/How-Survive-Thrive-Challenging-Times/dp/B088T5L251/ref=sr_1_1?dchild=1&keywords=piers+cross&qid=1609869608&sr=8-1

For more videos please visit: http://youtube.com/pierscross

For FB: https://www.facebook.com/pierscrosspublic

For Piers' website and a free training How To Find Peace In Everyday Life: https://www.piers-cross.com/community

Many blessings,

Piers Cross

http://piers-cross.com/

AEM #75 Nicky Moxey– ACES, Boarding School 

What are third culture kids? And what about military brats? 

And how does that link to boarding schools? 

Today I am speaking with author, Nicky Moxey about what third culture kids are. 

Nicky grew up in Africa but was sent to boarding school in the UK. 

She talks about the three different types of third culture kid - military, mercantile and missionary.

What is the difference between the three and why do third culture kids seem to struggle the most at boarding school? 

---

In today's episode we discuss these topics and why Nicky Moxey is a an author, an amateur historian and archaeologist who lives in the middle of rural Suffolk, UK. She is currently writing and editing a book about boarding school and has published several historical fiction books.

Questions:

1. I would love for you to share some of your journey. How did you get into the work you now do?
2. Could you please speak about your boarding school experiences. How was it for you? When did you fully realise the impact it had had on your life?
3. Could you please talk about ACES, Adverse Childhood Experiences? What are they? What is the impact of them on children and the adults they become?
4. Could you talk about the cross over between ACES and boarding school please? Is there any overlap and if so what is it?
5. Could you please talk about Third Culture Kids. What does that mean?
6. Could you please talk about your new book about boarding school? What is it about and what is the message of the book?
7. Could you also please talk about the new book about boarding schools, The Trunk in the Hall by Penny Cavenaugh? What did you think about the book? 
8. How do people find out more about your work?

#thirdculturekids #aces #boardingschoolsyndrome #adversechildhoodexperiences

To visit Nicky's website please visit: https://nickymoxey.com/

To buy Nicky's books please visit: https://www.amazon.co.uk/s?k=nicky+moxey&crid=98YVPH9QKK1O&sprefix=nicky+mox%2Caps%2C361&ref=nb_sb_ss_ts-doa-p_1_9

---

Piers is an author and a men's transformational coach and therapist who works mainly with trauma, boarding school issues, addictions and relationship problems.

He also runs online men's groups for ex-boarders, retreats and a podcast called An Evolving Man.

He is also the author of How to Survive and Thrive in Challenging Times. To purchase Piers first book: https://www.amazon.co.uk/How-Survive-Thrive-Challenging-Times/dp/B088T5L251/ref=sr_1_1?dchild=1&keywords=piers+cross&qid=1609869608&sr=8-1

For more videos please visit: http://youtube.com/pierscross

For FB: https://www.facebook.com/pierscrosspublic

For Piers' website and a free training How To Find Peace In Everyday Life: https://www.piers-cross.com/community

Many blessings,

Piers Cross

http://piers-cross.com/

 Been reading #GaborMate 's excellent book #mythofnormal. 

I talk today about the overlap between his chapter about our leaders "the traumatized leading the traumatized" and Nick Duffell's wounded leaders. 

David Cameron: Age 7 talking about his time at boarding school: 'The food was spartan. I lost a stone in weight during a single term. There was one meal that consisted of curry, rice – and maggots.’ 

Richard Branson: BBC Interview: https://www.dailymotion.com/video/x8mig8c 11.13
“I know that my parents sent me to boarding school because they thought that that was the best thing and the best thing for me. To bring us up tough. And my mother would say not to mollycoddle you at home. But I think that it was wrong. We would never do it with our kids or grandkids. I remember distinctly, I was 7 and a half, throwing up the first night and the matron coming in and telling me I had to mop up the sheets myself. I think that’s a bit much for a 7 and a half year old. Fortunately, things have changed a little bit since those days.” 

And more about his boarding school: “We got beaten all the time. You’d be beaten with a bare arse and sometimes until you bled. It was pretty horrendous in those days and as a dyslexic I thought I must be stupid because the word dyslexia didn’t exist. "

---

Piers is an author and a men's transformational coach and therapist who works mainly with trauma, boarding school issues, addictions and relationship problems.

He also runs online men's groups for ex-boarders, retreats and a podcast called An Evolving Man.

He is also the author of How to Survive and Thrive in Challenging Times. To purchase Piers first book: https://www.amazon.co.uk/How-Survive-Thrive-Challenging-Times/dp/B088T5L251/ref=sr_1_1?dchild=1&keywords=piers+cross&qid=1609869608&sr=8-1

For more videos please visit: http://youtube.com/pierscross

For FB: https://www.facebook.com/pierscrosspublic

For Piers' website and a free training How To Find Peace In Everyday Life: https://www.piers-cross.com/community

Many blessings,

Piers Cross

http://piers-cross.com/

Please note that some listeners might find this episode triggering. We cover some subjects which some people might find upsetting to hear.

In this episode, the creator of Judge Dredd and 2000AD talks about his experiences of attending a Catholic private school in the UK.

He shares his experiences of child sexual abuse while there. What happened?

He also shares a lot of the back story around the abuse in the Catholic Church. Why has it gone on for so long?

He talks about the safeguarding operations that the Catholic Church has put in and how effective they are, the RLSS, the CSSA.

He also talks about the Knights of St Columbus and the Masons.

---

Patrick Eamon Mills is an English comics writer and editor (who, along with John Wagner, revitalised British boys comics in the 1970s, and has remained a leading light in British comics ever since. He has been called "the godfather of British comics". His comics are notable for their violence and anti-authoritarianism. He is best known for creating 2000 AD and playing a major part in the development of Judge Dredd who was inspired by some of the abusive and violent monks at his Catholic boys' school. He also writes film treatments and screenplays, novels, and features, notably on World War One and is known for the documentary drama, Charley's War.

All of his stories are about fighting abusive authority figures. Pat would also be described as a whistleblower. He's got a really insightful grasp of the structure of the Roman Catholic Church, and how its highly organised structure has enabled a network of paedophiles to operate within it. He's working hard to expose this and make it more transparent to others.

Questions:

1. I would love for you to share some of your journey. How did you get into the work you now do?
2. When did you first realise that love of writing comics?
3. Could you please talk a little about your upbringing at Catholic Schools? What was being at Catholic schools like?
4. At what point did you start to uncover and realise what had gone on at school?
5. You started a website of survivors of abuse from your school. When did you realise that you weren't the only one to have suffered abuse? How did that feel to not be the only one?
6. How has the Catholic Church responded in your opinion to the claims of sexual abuse? Why do you think this is the case?
7. What about St Joseph's and the De Salle Brothers? How have they handled the claims against them?
8. What advice would you give to people who were abused at school either day or boarding who now want to speak up? 
9. Why is that so few people who were abused are willing to speak up? How can we change the system so that it becomes part of our culture to whistleblow when abuse or bad things have happened?
10. Could you please talk a little about the RLSS? How is this organisation supporting abuse survivors?
11. Could you talk about the financial exploitation of the Global South? What did you learn in your research?
12. I

---

Piers is an author and a men's transformational coach and therapist who works mainly with trauma, boarding school issues, addictions and relationship problems.

He also runs online men's groups for ex-boarders, retreats and a podcast called An Evolving Man.

He is also the author of How to Survive and Thrive in Challenging Times. To purchase Piers first book: https://www.amazon.co.uk/How-Survive-Thrive-Challenging-Times/dp/B088T5L251/ref=sr_1_1?dchild=1&keywords=piers+cross&qid=1609869608&sr=8-1

For more videos please visit: http://youtube.com/pierscross

For FB: https://www.facebook.com/pierscrosspublic

For Piers' website and a free training How To Find Peace In Everyday Life: https://www.piers-cross.com/community

Many blessings,

Piers Cross

http://piers-cross.com/

 This weekend with my wife and the director of my film, Boarding on Insanity we are going to be attending Gabor Mate's conference/ workshop. 

To sign up to support our film please visit: https://www.piers-cross.com/boarding-school-film 

We will also be interviewing Alex Renton and Dr Suzanne Zeedyk while we are there. 

I am looking forward to it.

If you would like me to share what I learned on the conference please let me know in the comments below. 

Warm regards, Piers 

---

Piers is an author and a men's transformational coach and therapist who works mainly with trauma, boarding school issues, addictions and relationship problems.

He also runs online men's groups for ex-boarders, retreats and a podcast called An Evolving Man.

He is also the author of How to Survive and Thrive in Challenging Times. To purchase Piers first book: https://www.amazon.co.uk/How-Survive-Thrive-Challenging-Times/dp/B088T5L251/ref=sr_1_1?dchild=1&keywords=piers+cross&qid=1609869608&sr=8-1

For more videos please visit: http://youtube.com/pierscross

For FB: https://www.facebook.com/pierscrosspublic

For Piers' website and a free training How To Find Peace In Everyday Life: https://www.piers-cross.com/community

Many blessings,

Piers Cross

http://piers-cross.com/

In this episode with bestselling parenting author, Sarah Ockwell-Smith, we talk about childism.

What is childism? Sarah shares that childism is the “unconscious discrimination of children in our world – and why it impacts everybody

Why are we childist as a society? Why do we not take care of our children especially in terms of discipline and sleep regimes?

Sarah talks about her new book, “Because I Said So!” about the history of childism and .

She also shares her thoughts about boarding school. Is boarding school childist?

---

Sarah Ockwell-Smith is a well known parenting expert and a highly regarded popular childcare author who writes about the psychology and science of parenting.

Sarah specialises in ‘gentle parenting’ (she is often credited as being the founder of the movement) and childism (the unconscious discrimination of children in society today).

Sarah has authored 14 parenting books, translated into over 30 languages, which have sold over half a million copies.

1. I would love for you to share some of your journey. How did you get into the work you now do?
2. Could you please explain the core principle behind your new book, “Because I Said So!”? What is the book about? What's the main message?
3. Chapter 2: P.30: Historically, how have we treated children in the UK?
4. Chapter 3-4: Has this changed now? If not, what is still happening especially regarding discipline and sleep?
5. P.153: Cognitive dissonance: Why do people dismiss the idea of childism and get angry about it?
6. Boarding schools:  Do you feel that boarding schools are childist?
7.  P.88:“Politicians, ultimately, have control over almost every element of a child’s life.” Could it be that the reason our leaders are childist is due to their upbringings in these boarding school institutions? Many of our leaders received abuse, bullying and neglect in these schools e.g. David Cameron lost a stone in weight age 7 or 8, there was sexual abuse going on when Boris Johnson was at prep school.
   P152: “People raised on love see things differently than those raised on survival.” Joy Marino, Author. Nick Duffell: “Every single child when they arrive in a boarding institution - they have to survive. And they have to survive without their parents.”
8. Could you please talk about the UNCRC (UN Convention on the Rights of Children)? Why does there seem to be such a divide between children's and adults rights?
9. Why is our eduction system not fit for purpose?
10. What is the solution? How do we become a cycle breaker?

To connect to Sarah's website please visit:https://sarahockwell-smith.com/

To connect to her on Twitter: https://twitter.com/TheBabyExpert

For her latest book, Because I Said So!: https://sarahockwell-smith.com/because-i-said-so/

---

Piers is an author and a men's transformational coach and therapist who works mainly with trauma, boarding school issues, addictions and relationship problems.

He also runs online men's groups for ex-boarders, retreats and a podcast called An Evolving Man.

He is also the author of How to Survive and Thrive in Challenging Times. To purchase Piers first book: https://www.amazon.co.uk/How-Survive-Thrive-Challenging-Times/dp/B088T5L251/ref=sr_1_1?dchild=1&keywords=piers+cross&qid=1609869608&sr=8-1

For more videos please visit: http://youtube.com/pierscross

For FB: https://www.facebook.com/pierscrosspublic

For Piers' website and a free training How To Find Peace In Everyday Life: https://www.piers-cross.com/community

Many blessings,

Piers Cross

http://piers-cross.com/

Childhood Trauma and Forgiveness. Why We Need to Forgive Both Ourselves and Others 

 Today I wanted to share some thoughts about forgiveness. 

Why is forgiveness so important in the healing of childhood trauma? 

I talk about why forgiveness is not about condoning what others have done but it is more about ourselves. 

When we forgive we release the resentment and the hatred that we are carrying. 

I link it in to boarding school trauma and also to Jennifer Freyd's betrayal trauma. 

Here is the boarding school men's circle I spoke about: https://www.piers-cross.com/online-mens-circles 

And here is the latest podcast with leading parenting expert Sarah Ockwell-Smith: https://youtu.be/ijqYaxlXK34 

Warm regards, Piers 

---

Piers is an author and a men's transformational coach and therapist who works mainly with trauma, boarding school issues, addictions and relationship problems.

He also runs online men's groups for ex-boarders, retreats and a podcast called An Evolving Man.

He is also the author of How to Survive and Thrive in Challenging Times. To purchase Piers first book: https://www.amazon.co.uk/How-Survive-Thrive-Challenging-Times/dp/B088T5L251/ref=sr_1_1?dchild=1&keywords=piers+cross&qid=1609869608&sr=8-1

For more videos please visit: http://youtube.com/pierscross

For FB: https://www.facebook.com/pierscrosspublic

For Piers' website and a free training How To Find Peace In Everyday Life: https://www.piers-cross.com/community

Many blessings,

Piers Cross

http://piers-cross.com/

 Today I wanted to share some of the symptoms of boarding school syndrome. 

I draw upon the work of Prof Joy Schaverien and Nick Duffell. 

I also draw on my 8 years of clinical work with ex-boarders. 

What are some of the commons symptoms of having been to public school? 

You might not have had any specific trauma and yet being in the boarding school environment is considered a developmental trauma. 

How might this manifest as an adult? 

I also talk about the Boarding School Survivors conference: https://www.bss-support.org.uk/final-call-for-conference-2023-registration/ 

I will be there at the conference on the 11th November. 

And I talk about my own work with ex-boarders. You can find out more here: https://www.piers-cross.com/coaching 

And Boarding School Survivors therapists website: https://www.boardingschoolsurvivors.co.uk/private-therapy-for-boarding-school-survivors/ 

Take care, Piers 

---

Piers is an author and a men's transformational coach and therapist who works mainly with trauma, boarding school issues, addictions and relationship problems.

He also runs online men's groups for ex-boarders, retreats and a podcast called An Evolving Man.

He is also the author of How to Survive and Thrive in Challenging Times. To purchase Piers first book: https://www.amazon.co.uk/How-Survive-Thrive-Challenging-Times/dp/B088T5L251/ref=sr_1_1?dchild=1&keywords=piers+cross&qid=1609869608&sr=8-1

For more videos please visit: http://youtube.com/pierscross

For FB: https://www.facebook.com/pierscrosspublic

For Piers' website and a free training How To Find Peace In Everyday Life: https://www.piers-cross.com/community

Many blessings,

Piers Cross

http://piers-cross.com/

Today I am speaking with Marcus Gottlieb about sexuality in boarding schools. He talks about his experience of working with gay, lesbian and bisexual ex-boarders. 

He also talks about how boarding school was like “a penal colony on Mars” for him. He talks about fagging, being given sedatives as a home sickness medicine, what boarding school syndrome is and how it impacts adults.

A really fascinating conversation.

---

Marcus Gottlieb is an experienced psychotherapist of humanistic and integrative orientation. He is registered with the UK Council for Psychotherapy and accredited by the British Association for Counselling and Psychotherapy. One half of his practice is supporting boarding school survivors.

Questions for Marcus:

1. I would love for you to share some of your journey. How did you get into the work you now do?
2. Could you please talk about boarding school syndrome. What is it and how does it impact adults?
3. How was your boarding school experience like?
4. Boarding schools claim to instil 'character', self-confidence and self-reliance. Do you agree? What is your clinical experience?
5. What are some of the symptoms of boarding school syndrome as an adult?
6. Could you talk about the impact of sexuality in a boarding school setting?
7. How does boarding school impact us sexually, especially if we are gay, lesbian or bisexual? “...all experienced their schools as profoundly homophobic environments.” P.20
8. Why is it difficult for gay men and women to come to terms with their boarding school experience?
9. Other areas to talk about:
   1. The double bind
   2. How the body restricts itself – throat, chest
   3. Denying and ignoring the needs of the body
   4. If our leaders who have attended BS have denied and ignored their own needs how might that manifest when they are looking after a whole country?
   5. Timetabling
   6. The lack of privacy
   7. BS seem to “produce compliant conformists and sabotaging rebels.”
   8. “repressive, austere, joyless institutions from which everything tactile, sensual or voluptuous was deliberately excluded.” P.20

To reach out to Marcus or learn more about his work please visit either: https://nottinghilltherapy.co.uk/

Or: https://www.bodyinmind.london/

Or the website: https://boardingrecovery.com/

---

Piers is an author and a men's transformational coach and therapist who works mainly with trauma, boarding school issues, addictions and relationship problems.

He also runs online men's groups for ex-boarders, retreats and a podcast called An Evolving Man.

He is also the author of How to Survive and Thrive in Challenging Times. To purchase Piers first book: https://www.amazon.co.uk/How-Survive-Thrive-Challenging-Times/dp/B088T5L251/ref=sr_1_1?dchild=1&keywords=piers+cross&qid=1609869608&sr=8-1

For more videos please visit: http://youtube.com/pierscross

For FB: https://www.facebook.com/pierscrosspublic

For Piers' website and a free training How To Find Peace In Everyday Life: https://www.piers-cross.com/community

Many blessings,

Piers Cross

http://piers-cross.com/

On today's conversation we explore trauma, child development, education and self-directed learning.

What is trauma? How might trauma show up as an adult.

She also talk about the modern education system. What is it like? What needs to change?

We also delve into boarding schools. What is the opinion of clinical psychologist, who specialises in education about boarding schools? Dr Fisher also attended boarding school in her sixth form. What was her experience like?

Are boarding schools developmentally damaging for children?

---

Dr Naomi Fisher is an independent clinical psychologist and EMDR-Europe trainer. She specialises in trauma, autism and alternative approaches to education. She works with children, adolescents and adults. 

She is the author of Changing our Minds: How Children Can Take Control of their Own Learning (Robinson, 2021) and A Different Way to Learn: Neurodiversity and Self-Directed Education (JKP, 2023). 

Questions for Naomi:

1. I would love for you to share some of your journey. How did you get into the work you now do?
2. Could you please talk about trauma and child development? How does trauma impact a child?
3. How might these trauma symptoms show up as an adult?
4. In one interview you mentioned “School is restricting children from a natural developmental process.” Could you please explain and expand? Is school the best way to educate your child?
5. What is your assessment of modern day schools? What needs to change?
6. In your clinical experience what do you think of boarding schools?
7. In my research it seems that no child development theory suggests that taking children away from parents is a good thing. If this is true, why do you think that we still say that boarding school is 'the making of us.'
8. What is neurodiversity?
9. What is a different way to learn? What is self-directed learning?
10. What is your vision for the future regarding education of our children?
11. How do people learn more about you?

To learn more about Dr Fisher and her work please visit: https://www.naomifisher.co.uk/

#trauma #childdevelopment #boardingschool #educationsystem #education #neurodiversity

---

Piers is an author and a men's transformational coach and therapist who works mainly with trauma, boarding school issues, addictions and relationship problems.

He also runs online men's groups for ex-boarders, retreats and a podcast called An Evolving Man.

He is also the author of How to Survive and Thrive in Challenging Times. To purchase Piers first book: https://www.amazon.co.uk/How-Survive-Thrive-Challenging-Times/dp/B088T5L251/ref=sr_1_1?dchild=1&keywords=piers+cross&qid=1609869608&sr=8-1

For more videos please visit: http://youtube.com/pierscross

For FB: https://www.facebook.com/pierscrosspublic

For Piers' website and a free training How To Find Peace In Everyday Life: https://www.piers-cross.com/community

Many blessings,

Piers Cross

http://piers-cross.com/

 Today I wanted to offer some more reflections about trauma recovery. 

In my own life I used to persecute myself a lot. As Pete Walker in his book Complex PTSD says, we can often have a very strong inner critic. This was me. 

Today I share some of the teachings of David Emerald from his book, The Power of TED, The Empowerment Dynamic. 

A few months ago I recorded the first part about Victim to Creator: https://youtu.be/9b75WXHtyLs Today I share the second part. 

What is the persecutor? What is the challenger and how do we move from persecutor to challenger?

I also talk about the work of Robert Moore and Douglas Gillette in King, Warrior, Magician, Lover. What is the Tyrant? 

I also spoke about the conference which will be happening this weekend in London with Joy Schaverien and Nick Duffell: https://www.bss-support.org.uk/final-call-for-conference-2023-registration/ 

Any questions please do let me know. 

Best regards, Piers 

#codependency #trauma #persecutor #tyrant #challenger #powerofted 

---

Piers is an author and a men's transformational coach and therapist who works mainly with trauma, boarding school issues, addictions and relationship problems.

He also runs online men's groups for ex-boarders, retreats and a podcast called An Evolving Man.

He is also the author of How to Survive and Thrive in Challenging Times. To purchase Piers first book: https://www.amazon.co.uk/How-Survive-Thrive-Challenging-Times/dp/B088T5L251/ref=sr_1_1?dchild=1&keywords=piers+cross&qid=1609869608&sr=8-1

For more videos please visit: http://youtube.com/pierscross

For FB: https://www.facebook.com/pierscrosspublic

For Piers' website and a free training How To Find Peace In Everyday Life: https://www.piers-cross.com/community

Many blessings,

Piers Cross

http://piers-cross.com/

A leading teacher and former head of department talks about the modern education system both private and state.

What is not working in the current system?

What needs to change?

What does he think about Ofsted?

A great conversation talking about Paul's experiences at a public school, boarding school and working as a teacher in the state system.

---
Paul has degrees in Geography and ICT. He has spent much of his teaching career as Head of ICT/Computing, Business Studies, Childcare & Development and Health & Social Care. He now runs Parent Guide to GCSE with his wife, Emily, which coaches parents in how to support their children through their teenage years.

Questions for Paul:

1. I would love for you to share some of your journey. How did you get into the work you now do?
2. I would love for you to speak about the difference between the private school education system and the state school system. What was it like spending time in each of those environments?
3. What was your boarding school education like?
4. What is currently not working in the modern education system?
5. What are some of the solutions to overcoming these issues?
6. Could you please talk about mental health in our education system? What are you seeing? What are the tools that are helping the young people with their mental health?
7. What can we do to start changing it?
8. What do you think of OFSTED? What are some of the stories you have heard in your time as a department head?
9. What can we do to start getting fathers to engage more with the upbringing of their children?
10. Fathers for Justice. I would love for you to speak a bit about fathers for justice. Could you please talk about your own experiences – what is the current system like and what needs, in your opinion, to change?
11. How do people learn more about you?

#education #privateschools #boardingschool #ofsted #failingeducation #fathersforjustice

To learn more about Paul and his work please visit: https://www.parentguidetogcse.com

or: https://www.parentguidetoeducation.com/

Email: paul@parentguidetogcse.com

---

Piers is an author and a men's transformational coach and therapist who works mainly with trauma, boarding school issues, addictions and relationship problems.

He also runs online men's groups for ex-boarders, retreats and a podcast called An Evolving Man.

He is also the author of How to Survive and Thrive in Challenging Times. To purchase Piers first book: https://www.amazon.co.uk/How-Survive-Thrive-Challenging-Times/dp/B088T5L251/ref=sr_1_1?dchild=1&keywords=piers+cross&qid=1609869608&sr=8-1

For more videos please visit: http://youtube.com/pierscross

For FB: https://www.facebook.com/pierscrosspublic

For Piers' website and a free training How To Find Peace In Everyday Life: https://www.piers-cross.com/community

Many blessings,

Piers Cross

http://piers-cross.com/

A big thank you for your donations so far. 

We have raised $2500 after the first five days which is wonderful. 

Thank you. 

To watch the trailer and support the film please visit (please be aware that there is a trigger warning - some upsetting things are shared) : 

https://www.indiegogo.com/projects/boarding-on-insanity/x/15184448#/ 

And if you can't financially support the film please do share via email or messenger to people who you think might really benefit from watching the trailer. 

Thank you, Piers 

---

Piers is an author and a men's transformational coach and therapist who works mainly with trauma, boarding school issues, addictions and relationship problems.

He also runs online men's groups for ex-boarders, retreats and a podcast called An Evolving Man.

He is also the author of How to Survive and Thrive in Challenging Times. To purchase Piers first book: https://www.amazon.co.uk/How-Survive-Thrive-Challenging-Times/dp/B088T5L251/ref=sr_1_1?dchild=1&keywords=piers+cross&qid=1609869608&sr=8-1

For more videos please visit: http://youtube.com/pierscross

For FB: https://www.facebook.com/pierscrosspublic

For Piers' website and a free training How To Find Peace In Everyday Life: https://www.piers-cross.com/community

Many blessings,

Piers Cross

http://piers-cross.com/

 What is the impact of private education on the UK? 

Should we abolish Eton?

Today on the podcast assistant professor in Sociology, Dr Sol Gamsu talks about elitism in education.

How does this show up?

And what is the impact on the UK?

---
Dr Sol Gamsu is an assistant professor in sociology at Durham University. He is also a sociologist and a geographer of education with a strong commitment to the politics of education and envisaging alternative futures for education and society more broadly. 

His research focuses on elite schooling and he was one of the co-founders of the Labour Against Private Schools Campaign/Abolish Eton in 2019.

Questions for Sol:

1. I would love for you to share some of your journey. How did you get into the work you now do?
2. Why we do not need elitism in education? 
3. Why are some children worth more? What is the economic gap between state and private schools in the UK?
4. What is the impact on our education system of having such a disparity between the rich and poor schools?
5. In 2021 you wrote a report about the private-state school funding gap in England. What were your findings?
6. Could you please talk about charitable status in private schools? What is this and why is it still in place?
7. P.4: (1869): “This legislation effectively placed these schools 'beyond the reach of normal democratic process' where they have remained.” Please discuss.
8. Clarenden Commission & PS Act 1868: “great endowments were reserved for those who could pay.” You mention that this was against the founders wishes. What were the founders wishes? Is this still the case today?
9. What is the HMC? How much influence does it have?
10. What steps can we do to change the system? What are your policy recommendations?

#abolisheton #boardingschool #eliteeducation #privateschools #education

To find out more about Dr Gamsu's report please visit: https://www.common-wealth.org/publications/why-are-some-children-worth-more-than-others

https://www.durham.ac.uk/staff/sol-j-gamsu 

---

Piers is an author and a men's transformational coach and therapist who works mainly with trauma, boarding school issues, addictions and relationship problems.

He also runs online men's groups for ex-boarders, retreats and a podcast called An Evolving Man.

He is also the author of How to Survive and Thrive in Challenging Times. To purchase Piers first book: https://www.amazon.co.uk/How-Survive-Thrive-Challenging-Times/dp/B088T5L251/ref=sr_1_1?dchild=1&keywords=piers+cross&qid=1609869608&sr=8-1

For more videos please visit: http://youtube.com/pierscross

For FB: https://www.facebook.com/pierscrosspublic

For Piers' website and a free training How To Find Peace In Everyday Life: https://www.piers-cross.com/community

Many blessings,

Piers Cross

http://piers-cross.com/

Today's conversation is with author Person Irresponsible (PI). PI is the author of two books. 

Her first book charts her walk from the Mexico to the border of Canada in 2020. Her second book talks about her journey around the UK in a van and also shares some of her boarding school journey.

In this episode we talk about her experiences of boarding school and how that has impacted her life. She talks about how she came across the issue of boarding school while attending Alcoholics Anonymous (AA). In one meeting 5 out of the 6 attendees were ex-boarders.

PI shares her journey of recovery and also talk about her experiences of being a third culture kid (third country kid). She also shares the difference between girls boarding schools and co-ed boarding schools. What does happen in a girls boarding school?

A fascinating conversation.

---

Person Irresponsible is the author of several bestselling book including Everywhere I Never Wanted To Go and Everything You Ever Taught Me about her travels across the UK and walking from Canada to Mexico. She is also an ex-boarder who attended two boarding schools.

Questions for PI:

1. I would love for you to share some of your journey. How did you start to realise the impact that boarding school has had on you?
2. Other areas to talk about:
   1. Third culture kids
   2. Losing home
   3. Depression and how school dealt with it
   4. The language of denial – especially - “It never did me any harm...”
   5. The marketing and business side of a boarding school
   6. The psychological abuse girls are put under
   7. What were the punishments like?
   8. What in your eyes have been some of the side effects of boarding school on your life?
   9. Never settling
   10. Addictions
   11. Matriarchy

#boardingschool #girlsboardingschool #addictionrecovery #alanon 

To find out more about Person Irresponsible please visit: https://personirresponsible.com

And to buy her book please visit: https://personirresponsible.com/books or on Amazon: https://www.amazon.co.uk/Everything-You-Ever-Taught-Me/dp/1527295745

---

Piers is an author and a men's transformational coach and therapist who works mainly with trauma, boarding school issues, addictions and relationship problems.

He also runs online men's groups for ex-boarders, retreats and a podcast called An Evolving Man.

He is also the author of How to Survive and Thrive in Challenging Times. To purchase Piers first book: https://www.amazon.co.uk/How-Survive-Thrive-Challenging-Times/dp/B088T5L251/ref=sr_1_1?dchild=1&keywords=piers+cross&qid=1609869608&sr=8-1

For more videos please visit: http://youtube.com/pierscross

For FB: https://www.facebook.com/pierscrosspublic

For Piers' website and a free training How To Find Peace In Everyday Life: https://www.piers-cross.com/community

Many blessings,

Piers Cross

http://piers-cross.com/

 Review of RRR - Indian Film - The Psychology of the British Raj & The British Empire's Cruelty 

Today I wanted to offer some reflections about the Indian Telugu film, RRR, directed by Rajamouli, featuring Ram Charam and NT Rama Rao Jr. 

I watched this film at the weekend and today wanted to offer some reflections about the psychology of the British Raj which we see played out in the film. 

The story of the film starts with the British Governor played by Ray Stevenson and his wife who buy a young girl from a village they are visiting. The village presume they are being paid for the singing, not for the girl and try to get the child back.

The girl has a protector who tries to rescue the girl, a man called Bheem, played by NT Rama Rao Jr. 

The story shows his battle to get the girl back from the British whlie battling a policeman played by Ram Charam. 

I was drawn to writing a review because of how the trauma and cruelty of the British Empire is potrayed in the film and how I feel it links into the education of the British especially boarding school. 

I quote from Nick Duffell author of Wounded Leaders. 

#rrr #britishraj #britishempire #legacyofviolence 

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/RRR 

For more information about the film about the trauma of our leaders, Boarding on Insanity please visit: https://www.indiegogo.com/projects/boarding-on-insanity/x/15184448#/ 

---

Piers is an author and a men's transformational coach and therapist who works mainly with trauma, boarding school issues, addictions and relationship problems.

He also runs online men's groups for ex-boarders, retreats and a podcast called An Evolving Man.

He is also the author of How to Survive and Thrive in Challenging Times. To purchase Piers first book: https://www.amazon.co.uk/How-Survive-Thrive-Challenging-Times/dp/B088T5L251/ref=sr_1_1?dchild=1&keywords=piers+cross&qid=1609869608&sr=8-1

For more videos please visit: http://youtube.com/pierscross

For FB: https://www.facebook.com/pierscrosspublic

For Piers' website and a free training How To Find Peace In Everyday Life: https://www.piers-cross.com/community

Many blessings,

Piers Cross

http://piers-cross.com/

 Stress - How To Relieve Stress. Stress Management Strategies 

Today I wanted to share some techniques for managing stress.

As trauma survivors we often struggle with stress and can get stressed quite easily.

In this podcast I wanted to share some thoughts about what you can do the next time you are feeling stressed. 

What are some practices you can use to manage your stress levels?

To support the film, Boarding on Insanity: https://www.indiegogo.com/projects/boarding-on-insanity#/ 

Kelly McGonigal's Ted Talk. How to Make Stress Your Friend: https://youtu.be/RcGyVTAoXEU?si=iG0bud8yTZu-z-zj 

Warm regards,

Piers

---

Piers is an author and a men's transformational coach and therapist who works mainly with trauma, boarding school issues, addictions and relationship problems.

He also runs online men's groups for ex-boarders, retreats and a podcast called An Evolving Man.

He is also the author of How to Survive and Thrive in Challenging Times. To purchase Piers first book: https://www.amazon.co.uk/How-Survive-Thrive-Challenging-Times/dp/B088T5L251/ref=sr_1_1?dchild=1&keywords=piers+cross&qid=1609869608&sr=8-1

For more videos please visit: http://youtube.com/pierscross

For FB: https://www.facebook.com/pierscrosspublic

For Piers' website and a free training How To Find Peace In Everyday Life: https://www.piers-cross.com/community

Many blessings,

Piers Cross

http://piers-cross.com/

On today's podcast I am speaking with best selling author Michael Davitt, who writes under the pen name, Luke Pemberton.

Today he talks about some of his mental health journey.

He talks about his breakdown while working in the diplomatic service and how he links that into complex PTSD and his time spent as child growing up and at boarding school.

He also talk about Boris Johnson and how his boarding school experiences might have impacted his leadership.

---

Michael Davitt is an author focusing on mental health issues. He has published five books to-date under his author pseudonym, Luke Pemberton. His books are based around a series of his drawings illustrating how he experienced, and then recovered from, complex-PTSD stemming from emotional neglect in childhood. Prior to writing these books, Michael worked in the diplomatic field after several years in the private sector. He is from Porthcawl in South Wales and is now based in Vienna, Austria.

Some questions for Michael:

1. I would love for you to share some of your journey. How did you start to realise the impact that boarding school has had on you?
2. The notion that boarding school education equals privilege which can then shame people into not seeking the psychological help that many people inevitably need in adult life. 
3. How to overcome childhood trauma and the boarding school experience through:

• Acknowledging that things might have gone wrong for you in childhood and identifying the issues;
• Working through and processing the trauma (involving therapy, but most importantly honest introspection, note-taking or journaling, and then converting notes into drawings using analogies); 
• Executing a new life based on the knowledge and wisdom gained. 

1. The impact of religious education in male boarding schools." 
2. Other areas to talk about: Emotional neglect

• Complex PTSD
• The tools for recovery
• How to find your way out of despair
• Building your self-esteem

 #mentalhealth #complex ptsd #cptsd #breakdown #boardingschool #trauma

To buy Michael's books: https://www.amazon.co.uk/Find-Your-When-Despair-rediscovering/dp/1781327726?ref_=ast_author_dp

Or to reach out to him: info@lukepemberton.com Or to visit his website: https://www.lukepemberton.com/ 

Published books: How to Put a Troubled Past Behind You: A FRESH, drawing-based approach (Find help, Record your feelings, Sketch your thoughts, and Harvest your success (self-published 2021).

How to Feel More Beautiful Inside: Learn to love yourself a little more, one step at a time (self-published, with ebookpartnership, 2020).

How to See Religion Differently: What questioning your beliefs can reveal, and why it can lead to a healthier mind (Silverwood Books, 2018) 

---

Piers is an author and a men's transformational coach and therapist who works mainly with trauma, boarding school issues, addictions and relationship problems.

He also runs online men's groups for ex-boarders, retreats and a podcast called An Evolving Man.

He is also the author of How to Survive and Thrive in Challenging Times. To purchase Piers first book: https://www.amazon.co.uk/How-Survive-Thrive-Challenging-Times/dp/B088T5L251/ref=sr_1_1?dchild=1&keywords=piers+cross&qid=1609869608&sr=8-1

For more videos please visit: http://youtube.com/pierscross

For FB: https://www.facebook.com/pierscrosspublic

For Piers' website and a free training How To Find Peace In Everyday Life: https://www.piers-cross.com/community

Many blessings,

Piers Cross

http://piers-cross.com/

 Today I wanted to offer some reflections about the film and the current fundraising which you can find here: https://www.indiegogo.com/projects/boarding-on-insanity#/discussion 

We are currently half way through the fundraising. 

A big thanks for all your help. 

We have raised £5000 so far which is wonderful, thank you. 

We are starting to organise a retreat as part of the film. 

This will be a 4 day event where we will film 10 ex-boarders male and females. 

I talk a little today about what has been happening with the film. Please feel free to share the promo as much as possible. Thank you. 

Warm regards, Piers 

---

Piers is an author and a men's transformational coach and therapist who works mainly with trauma, boarding school issues, addictions and relationship problems.

He also runs online men's groups for ex-boarders, retreats and a podcast called An Evolving Man.

He is also the author of How to Survive and Thrive in Challenging Times. To purchase Piers first book: https://www.amazon.co.uk/How-Survive-Thrive-Challenging-Times/dp/B088T5L251/ref=sr_1_1?dchild=1&keywords=piers+cross&qid=1609869608&sr=8-1

For more videos please visit: http://youtube.com/pierscross

For FB: https://www.facebook.com/pierscrosspublic

For Piers' website and a free training How To Find Peace In Everyday Life: https://www.piers-cross.com/community

Many blessings,

Piers Cross

http://piers-cross.com/

 Wishing you all a Merry Xmas and a Happy New Year. 

Here's to a year of healing and moving into wholeness. 

Today I was asked some questions by someone who was going out with an ex-boarder. 

She tells me: "My ex partner is a boarding school survivor. We recently split up and I really miss him. I feel like he loves me, but pushes me away. I am wondering if I should just give him space? 

1. He pushes me away so much, so the point where he has blocked my number. Then, once I find a way to talk to him again, he acts like he really loves me. 

2. Is there a way I can get him to open up and talk to me? 

3. How can I express my needs to him without him getting frustrated and giving up?" 

Today I offer some reflections drawing on the work of attachment theory and the work of John Bowlby, CG Jung and Dr Diane Poole Heller. 

Warm regards, Piers 

#boardingschoolsurvivor #attachmenttheory #relationships 

---

Piers is an author and a men's transformational coach and therapist who works mainly with trauma, boarding school issues, addictions and relationship problems.

He also runs online men's groups for ex-boarders, retreats and a podcast called An Evolving Man.

He is also the author of How to Survive and Thrive in Challenging Times. To purchase Piers first book: https://www.amazon.co.uk/How-Survive-Thrive-Challenging-Times/dp/B088T5L251/ref=sr_1_1?dchild=1&keywords=piers+cross&qid=1609869608&sr=8-1

For more videos please visit: http://youtube.com/pierscross

For FB: https://www.facebook.com/pierscrosspublic

For Piers' website and a free training How To Find Peace In Everyday Life: https://www.piers-cross.com/community

Many blessings,

Piers Cross

http://piers-cross.com/

In working with ex-boarders I see that we are so hard on ourselves. 

Our inner critic can be brutal. 

Today I share some thoughts about #selfcompassion. 

What are 3 ways of cultivating it? #compassion 

https://youtu.be/PhHJ_ZlaaMc 

For the film fundraising: https://www.indiegogo.com/projects/boarding-on-insanity#/ 

---

Piers is an author and a men's transformational coach and therapist who works mainly with trauma, boarding school issues, addictions and relationship problems.

He also runs online men's groups for ex-boarders, retreats and a podcast called An Evolving Man.

He is also the author of How to Survive and Thrive in Challenging Times. To purchase Piers first book: https://www.amazon.co.uk/How-Survive-Thrive-Challenging-Times/dp/B088T5L251/ref=sr_1_1?dchild=1&keywords=piers+cross&qid=1609869608&sr=8-1

For more videos please visit: http://youtube.com/pierscross

For FB: https://www.facebook.com/pierscrosspublic

For Piers' website and a free training How To Find Peace In Everyday Life: https://www.piers-cross.com/community

Many blessings,

Piers Cross

http://piers-cross.com/

What is the impact of taking a child age 13 away from their family for a year and putting them in a boarding school?

And during that year the child only sees their parents once for Xmas?

What would happen to that child especially if they were put into one of the top boarding schools in the UK, Westminster?

Today I am speaking with author Andrew Kavchak who shares his own experience of living away from his parents for a whole year at Westminster.

He shares his loneliness, how it felt like he “had been dumped in a foreign orphanage,” and how he struggled with his studies.

A really fascinating conversation. I also really recommend his book.

---

Andrew Kavchak was born in Montreal and has called Ottawa home since the late 1980s. Andrew studied political science (M.A.) and law (LL.B.) at university and then joined the federal civil service to pursue a career in public policy. After a lengthy career in the bureaucracy he began writing books that are available on Amazon. Today we will be talking about his book, Westminster: Reflections of a Boarder.

Some questions for Andrew:

1. I would love for you to share some of your journey. What drew to you to writing your book about boarding school?
2. In writing your book you talk about the history of boarding school. What did you learn about the tradition of boarding?
3. Having been brought up in Canada what was it like being in a British boarding school. How much of a culture shock was it for you?
4. What was the number one thing that stood out to you about boarding? Both positive and negative.
5. What was the long separation from your parents like for you?
6. You mention having a big emotional release after watching an interview with Nick Duffell. Could you talk us through that please? What happened? 
7. Other areas to talk about:

• How historically Public School boys seemed to have preferential treatment (P.73)
• What is the HMC and is it still in place? (P.79)
• The lack of privacy (P.103)
• John Dancy and Public Schools and the Future. I found what he wrote shocking. What was your response to his words? (P.106-109)
• Belonging and exclusion
• Abandonment and alienation
• How boarding school affected you
• Success and failure
• History and modernity

#lifeofaboarder #westminster #boardingschoolsyndrome #abandonment

To buy Andrew's books: https://www.amazon.co.uk/Westminster-School-Reflections-Andrew-Kavchak/dp/B0BYR8PG12/ref=sr_1_fkmr0_1?keywords=andrew+kavchak&qid=1704370296&sr=8-1-fkmr0

---

Piers is an author and a men's transformational coach and therapist who works mainly with trauma, boarding school issues, addictions and relationship problems.

He also runs online men's groups for ex-boarders, retreats and a podcast called An Evolving Man.

He is also the author of How to Survive and Thrive in Challenging Times. To purchase Piers first book: https://www.amazon.co.uk/How-Survive-Thrive-Challenging-Times/dp/B088T5L251/ref=sr_1_1?dchild=1&keywords=piers+cross&qid=1609869608&sr=8-1

For more videos please visit: http://youtube.com/pierscross

For FB: https://www.facebook.com/pierscrosspublic

For Piers' website and a free training How To Find Peace In Everyday Life: https://www.piers-cross.com/community

Many blessings,

Piers Cross

http://piers-cross.com/

Touch is so important for #childdevelopment.

Last week I was reading author Andrew Kavchak's book about his boarding school experience:

"One of the features of being at a boarding school that contributed to my starting to feel like a grape drying on the vine and shriveling up like a raisin was the absense of any touching with another human being.

As the much-needed physical contact had vanished from my life I began to feel as though I was a Ieper."

Researchers, like Aikaterini -Katerina Fotopoulou talk about the importance of touch in human development.

Today I talk about the importance of touch and the lack of touch in boarding schools. How might that impact the children who are rarely touched for large parts of childhood?

#touch #trauma #traumarecovery #boardingschoolsyndrome #boardingschool

---

Piers is an author and a men's transformational coach and therapist who works mainly with trauma, boarding school issues, addictions and relationship problems.

He also runs online men's groups for ex-boarders, retreats and a podcast called An Evolving Man.

He is also the author of How to Survive and Thrive in Challenging Times. To purchase Piers first book: https://www.amazon.co.uk/How-Survive-Thrive-Challenging-Times/dp/B088T5L251/ref=sr_1_1?dchild=1&keywords=piers+cross&qid=1609869608&sr=8-1

For more videos please visit: http://youtube.com/pierscross

For FB: https://www.facebook.com/pierscrosspublic

For Piers' website and a free training How To Find Peace In Everyday Life: https://www.piers-cross.com/community

Many blessings,

Piers Cross

http://piers-cross.com/

Boarding at age two and a half. Today I am speaking with Roger Sharpley who went to boarding school from the ages of 2.5 until 7.5 years old.

What was the impact for him in his life?

Why did his parents send him and his sister to boarding school at such a young age?

We also talk about the path of recovery he has taken.

We talk about Buddhism, Tai Chi, Qigong, meditation, therapy and singing.

A very heart felt and sometimes tearful podcast episode this week.

---

Roger Sharpley is a retired homeopath. He originally worked in a seismology company before retraining as a homeopath. He went to boarding school from the age of 2.5 years old until the age of 7.

Some questions for Roger:

1. I would love for you to share some of your journey. What was your boarding school experience like?
2. Why did your parents send you to board so young? What was the reason for it?
3. What was the reason you left boarding school at age 7.5? Did something happen?
4. What happened after you left school? How was life as an adult?
5. When did you start to realise that your boarding school experience had impacted you?
6. What are some of the tools that you have found to help you begin the healing process?
7. Could you please speak to neglect and the lack of food? How did that impact you?
8. Other areas to talk about:

• Meditation
• Tai chi
• Singing and being in a choir
• PTSD and how the symptoms show up in your life
• Buddhism
• The importance of a loving relationship
• The healing power of animals and pets
• The importance of finding a therapist

 #boardingschoolsyndrome #trauma #ptsd #abandonment

---

Piers is an author and a men's transformational coach and therapist who works mainly with trauma, boarding school issues, addictions and relationship problems.

He also runs online men's groups for ex-boarders, retreats and a podcast called An Evolving Man.

He is also the author of How to Survive and Thrive in Challenging Times. To purchase Piers first book: https://www.amazon.co.uk/How-Survive-Thrive-Challenging-Times/dp/B088T5L251/ref=sr_1_1?dchild=1&keywords=piers+cross&qid=1609869608&sr=8-1

For more videos please visit: http://youtube.com/pierscross

For FB: https://www.facebook.com/pierscrosspublic

For Piers' website and a free training How To Find Peace In Everyday Life: https://www.piers-cross.com/community

Many blessings,

Piers Cross

http://piers-cross.com/

What were Tony Blair's experiences of boarding school like?

What went on at school and what did his teachers think of him?

Today I read some of the excerpts from the Tony Blair biography by John Rentoul.

I share some of the reflections of the teachers and also some of the events that went on during Tony's boarding school time.

I talk about how he was beaten by older boys and the housemaster and I talk about how he tried to run away.

I also share some of the reflections about what this means to us as the general public having leaders who have been through such trauma.

Warm regards,

Piers

 #tonyblair #trauma #boardingschool #boardingschoolsyndrome #iraqwar 

---

Piers is an author and a men's transformational coach and therapist who works mainly with trauma, boarding school issues, addictions and relationship problems.

He also runs online men's groups for ex-boarders, retreats and a podcast called An Evolving Man.

He is also the author of How to Survive and Thrive in Challenging Times. To purchase Piers first book: https://www.amazon.co.uk/How-Survive-Thrive-Challenging-Times/dp/B088T5L251/ref=sr_1_1?dchild=1&keywords=piers+cross&qid=1609869608&sr=8-1

For more videos please visit: http://youtube.com/pierscross

For FB: https://www.facebook.com/pierscrosspublic

For Piers' website and a free training How To Find Peace In Everyday Life: https://www.piers-cross.com/community

Many blessings,

Piers Cross

http://piers-cross.com/

Dr Mark Stibbe has been writing books since he was 16 and has clocked up over 50 titles. His PhD on storytelling was completed in 1982 and published by Cambridge University Press. Lately, Mark has been writing novels in the magical realism genre. His novel A Book in Time was picked as the overall winner out of hundreds of entries in the Page Turner Awards. His latest novel is called House of Dreams - a Tudor ghost story once again in the magical realism genre.

 Mark’s hobbies include Lego - he is the official Lego reviewer for Sorted Men’s Magazine. He also runs a new YouTube Channel called ‘The Christian Storyteller’.

He lives in Kent with his wife Cherith and their two Labradors – Bella and Phoebe.

Questions for Mark:

1. I would love for you to share some of your journey. How did you get into the work you now do?
2. Could you talk us through what drew you to write your book, Home at Last: Freedom from Boarding School Pain?
3. In the beginning of your book you talk about the link between Dickens' The Christmas Carol and boarding school. What was your insight?
4. You mention in your book that you feel that boarding schools are “orphanages for the privileged.” Could you expand on this please?
5. Could you please talk about abandonment, especially soul abandonment? In what ways did boarding school feel like abandonment to you?
6. Could you please talk about the physical violence you met at boarding school? How did that impact you and how did you learn to cope with this?
7. Could you please talk about the idea of the 'boarded heart'? What do you mean by this? How did you start to reconnect with your heart again?
8. How did this early experience impact you as an adult?
9. What helped you on the path of healing and coming home?
10. Other topics we could talk about:
    1. The cycle of pain: desertion, deprivation, disengagement and dependency
    2. Stages of recovery: revelation, restoration, reconnection and recovery.
    3. Attachment theory
    4. The importance of telling our stories
    5. Your most recent books: A House of Dreams, A Book in Time

#boardingschoolpain #healingfromtrauma #trauma #boardingschool

To buy Mark's books please visit: https://www.amazon.co.uk/Home-Last-Freedom-Boarding-School/dp/1910786411/ref=sr_1_2?crid=AZTEG7BGA20I&keywords=mark+stibbe&qid=1706004821&sprefix=mark+stibb%2Caps%2C103&sr=8-2

And to visit Mark's website: https://www.markstibbe.com/

For the David Cameron humming video: https://youtu.be/aETjM7dTWSM?si=VA7WEVL5QeMbGS5F

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Piers is an author and a men's transformational coach and therapist who works mainly with trauma, boarding school issues, addictions and relationship problems.

He also runs online men's groups for ex-boarders, retreats and a podcast called An Evolving Man.

He is also the author of How to Survive and Thrive in Challenging Times. To purchase Piers first book: https://www.amazon.co.uk/How-Survive-Thrive-Challenging-Times/dp/B088T5L251/ref=sr_1_1?dchild=1&keywords=piers+cross&qid=1609869608&sr=8-1

For more videos please visit: http://youtube.com/pierscross

For FB: https://www.facebook.com/pierscrosspublic

For Piers' website and a free training How To Find Peace In Everyday Life: https://www.piers-cross.com/community

Many blessings,

Piers Cross

http://piers-cross.com/

Today I make some reflections about attachment and how it relates at boarding school. 

I have been reading Isobel Ross' new book called Almost Boys ( I am interviewing her next Monday). https://www.amazon.co.uk/Almost-Boys-Psychology-Co-ed-Boarding-ebook/dp/B0CRLF8M6L/ref=sr_1_1?crid=Q4B2UE3HXS3K&keywords=almost+boys+isobel+ross&qid=1706691785&sprefix=isobel+ross%2Caps%2C469&sr=8-1 

She talks about attachment theory and especially anxious ambivalent attachment. 

I also draw upon the work of Dr Diane Poole Heller and her book The Power of Attachment, Nick Duffell and Thurstine Basset's Trauma, Abandonment and Priviledge and Anne Power's work. 

I also talk about my new podcast with Dr Mark Stibbe which will go live this Friday: https://youtu.be/2G6ZezF4HE0 

Warm regards, Piers 

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Piers is an author and a men's transformational coach and therapist who works mainly with trauma, boarding school issues, addictions and relationship problems.

He also runs online men's groups for ex-boarders, retreats and a podcast called An Evolving Man.

He is also the author of How to Survive and Thrive in Challenging Times. To purchase Piers first book: https://www.amazon.co.uk/How-Survive-Thrive-Challenging-Times/dp/B088T5L251/ref=sr_1_1?dchild=1&keywords=piers+cross&qid=1609869608&sr=8-1

For more videos please visit: http://youtube.com/pierscross

For FB: https://www.facebook.com/pierscrosspublic

For Piers' website and a free training How To Find Peace In Everyday Life: https://www.piers-cross.com/community

Many blessings,

Piers Cross

http://piers-cross.com/

Today I am speaking with the founder of First Men, Sam Adams about practices for mental and emotional health.

We talk about rewilding ourselves.

What does that mean? And what does it look like?

We also talk about reconnecting with nature and how important being outside is for our mental well-being.

A really fascinating conversation.

---

Sam Adams is the founder of First Men and Red Phoenix Rewilding which are companies that offer workshops and gatherings to create a more connected world, through rewilding ourselves and the planet. He has two decades of experience in the fields of land care, permaculture, and mental health. He belief is that our wounds can become our greatest gifts.

Some questions for Sam:

1. I would love for you to share about how you got into the work you now do?
2. Life is a journey. We need a map to find our way.
3. Problem = men are lost ('broken/traumatised/identity-lost/cultural orphans')
4. Solution = map
5. Nature provides that map. Reference points in each direction. 
6. The elements. Exploring fire/water/earth/air as metaphors for our personal psyche. Identity. Mental health. 
7. The compass points. E/S/W/N, above and below. We are in the middle. 
8. Knowing our relationship to all of nature, helps us on a healthy journey of life. What are some of the practices we can do in nature for our mental health?
9. Some of your stories and life experiences around nature
10. What are you seeing with men? Where are they stuck?
11. Some of the stories about the power of men and women in circle - Menfest and the Mankind Project.
12. The importance of emotions and dissociation

#rewildyourself #mentalhealth #natureawareness #mensmentalhealth #emotionalhealth

To find out more about Sam's work please visit: https://www.firstmen.co.uk or https://www.redphoenixrewilding.com

---

Piers is an author and a men's transformational coach and therapist who works mainly with trauma, boarding school issues, addictions and relationship problems.

He also runs online men's groups for ex-boarders, retreats and a podcast called An Evolving Man.

He is also the author of How to Survive and Thrive in Challenging Times. To purchase Piers first book: https://www.amazon.co.uk/How-Survive-Thrive-Challenging-Times/dp/B088T5L251/ref=sr_1_1?dchild=1&keywords=piers+cross&qid=1609869608&sr=8-1

For more videos please visit: http://youtube.com/pierscross

For FB: https://www.facebook.com/pierscrosspublic

For Piers' website and a free training How To Find Peace In Everyday Life: https://www.piers-cross.com/community

Many blessings,

Piers Cross

http://piers-cross.com/

What does an educational psychologist who has spent 30 years in this profession feel about boarding schools?

And what were her own experiences of boarding school like?

Today my guest shares her personal and professional experiences of boarding especially co-educational boarding.

What does attachment theory think of residential institutions?

And have boarding schools changed? Are children getting good educations in these institutions?

---

Morag Edwards has spent over 30 years as an educational psychologist and uses her knowledge of child development to shape fictional characters in both historical and contemporary fiction. She is the best-selling author of several books including her recent autobiography about her boarding school upbringing called, Almost Boys which is published under her pen name, Isobel Ross.

Questions for Morag:

1. I would love for you to share a little of your journey. How did you get into the work you now do?
2. What drew you to writing your experiences of boarding school down? How has it been for you once the book was released?
3. Some areas I would love to explore (we will not be able to get round to all the topics...):
   1. How parents of boarding school children might “be uncomfortable living with a child's emotions.” (P.17)
   2. Neglect – “no one had responsibility for us apart from each other.”the lack (P.28)
   3. Boarding school and broken attachments (P32-36) (P.129)
   4. “No matter how securely attached to their parents, all children will feel homesick when they arrive at BS and must grieve according to their pre-existing attachment style.” (P.38)
   5. We are told that more securely attached children fair better at boarding school. Do you feel this is the case? (P.38)
   6. The separation between home and school and how that was for you. (P.43) (P.72?
   7. Crushing our feelings/ dissociation (P.46)(P.69) (P.75)
   8. Being told: “The only reason you're here is because your parents don't love you.” (P.48)
   9. Petty rules (P.50)
   10. The missing element of child development: “I propose that the missing element is a parent's capacity to know the child's mind.” (P.54-55) Please expand.
   11. Neglect: “Neglect of indifference in our earliest years can mean a child remains stuck with a developmentally young way of expressing emotions.” (P.57)
   12. “Our 'home' could never be a place of safety or relaxation.” (P.74)
   13. Bullying (P.82) (P.116)
   14. How the system has not changed (P.96) (P.107) (P.241)
   15. Sexual bullying and Fisherman (P.115-130)

#boardingschool #coedboarding #boardingschoolsyndrome #attachmenttheory #trauma 

To purchase Morag's book please visit: https://www.amazon.co.uk/Almost-Boys-Psychology-Co-ed-Boarding-ebook/dp/B0CRLF8M6L/ref=sr_1_fkmr3_1?crid=29V35KQ0GWY2Z&keywords=isabel+ross+almost+boys&qid=1706967306&sprefix=isabel+ross+almost+boys%2Caps%2C85&sr=8-1-fkmr3

---

Piers is an author and a men's transformational coach and therapist who works mainly with trauma, boarding school issues, addictions and relationship problems.

He also runs online men's groups for ex-boarders, retreats and a podcast called An Evolving Man.

He is also the author of How to Survive and Thrive in Challenging Times. To purchase Piers first book: https://www.amazon.co.uk/How-Survive-Thrive-Challenging-Times/dp/B088T5L251/ref=sr_1_1?dchild=1&keywords=piers+cross&qid=1609869608&sr=8-1

For more videos please visit: http://youtube.com/pierscross

For FB: https://www.facebook.com/pierscrosspublic

For Piers' website and a free training How To Find Peace In Everyday Life: https://www.piers-cross.com/community

Many blessings,

Piers Cross

http://piers-cross.com/

 Today I talk about control. If we have been through some form of childhood trauma the chances are we were controlled by others. 

If we went to boarding school then many of us had petty rules we had to contend with and lived in a very controlled environment. 

And as adults we can become controlling of others. 

This can be unpleasant in relationships. 

So what can we do if we are controlling? 

I talk about Buddhism's Four Noble Truth, meditation and a little exercise. 

Take care, Piers 

#childdevelopment #childhoodtrauma #control #trauma #boardingschool 

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Piers is an author and a men's transformational coach and therapist who works mainly with trauma, boarding school issues, addictions and relationship problems.

He also runs online men's groups for ex-boarders, retreats and a podcast called An Evolving Man.

He is also the author of How to Survive and Thrive in Challenging Times. To purchase Piers first book: https://www.amazon.co.uk/How-Survive-Thrive-Challenging-Times/dp/B088T5L251/ref=sr_1_1?dchild=1&keywords=piers+cross&qid=1609869608&sr=8-1

For more videos please visit: http://youtube.com/pierscross

For FB: https://www.facebook.com/pierscrosspublic

For Piers' website and a free training How To Find Peace In Everyday Life: https://www.piers-cross.com/community

Many blessings,

Piers Cross

http://piers-cross.com/

Tom Greaves is an actor and comedian. He made an award winning show called, Goodbye Uncle Fudgey which was performed during the Edinburgh Fringe in 2023. It will be touring soon showing in London in April. This comedy tells the story of the fall out from boarding school. Tom trained at the world famous Ecole Philippe Gaulier clown school. 

Questions for Tom:

1. How did you get into the work you now do?
2. Could you please talk a little about your boarding school experiences? How was boarding for you?
3. What was the impetus for you doing your show, Goodbye Uncle Fudgey?
4. How did people respond to your show?
5. What about your family? Your family play a large role in the show. How did they respond to your performance?
6. What is the importance of humour as healing?
7. How cathartic was it, writing about your boarding school experiences?
8. Could you please talk about shame and emotions?
9. Kairos and Chronos. What is the difference between the two? How have we lost touch with Kairos?
10. How do people find out more about your work and upcoming shows?

#humour #laughterasmedicine #comedy #trauma #boardingschool #tomgreaves

To find out more about Tom's shows please visit: https://www.linkedin.com/in/tom-greaves-a55baa23/?originalSubdomain=uk

---

Piers is an author and a men's transformational coach and therapist who works mainly with trauma, boarding school issues, addictions and relationship problems.

He also runs online men's groups for ex-boarders, retreats and a podcast called An Evolving Man.

He is also the author of How to Survive and Thrive in Challenging Times. To purchase Piers first book: https://www.amazon.co.uk/How-Survive-Thrive-Challenging-Times/dp/B088T5L251/ref=sr_1_1?dchild=1&keywords=piers+cross&qid=1609869608&sr=8-1

For more videos please visit: http://youtube.com/pierscross

For FB: https://www.facebook.com/pierscrosspublic

For Piers' website and a free training How To Find Peace In Everyday Life: https://www.piers-cross.com/community

Many blessings,

Piers Cross

http://piers-cross.com/

 Today I offer an update to the documentary Boarding on Insanity #boardingoninsanity.

I share some reflections about the four days of filming we are about to undertake in Somerset. 

As part of the film we will be filming 10 ex-boarders at a workshop. 

What is the impact of boarding on both men and women? 

What was the experience like for them? 

Today I share some of my thoughts about the retreat. #healingretreat #trauma #boardingschool Warm regards, Piers 

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Piers is an author and a men's transformational coach and therapist who works mainly with trauma, boarding school issues, addictions and relationship problems.

He also runs online men's groups for ex-boarders, retreats and a podcast called An Evolving Man.

He is also the author of How to Survive and Thrive in Challenging Times. To purchase Piers first book: https://www.amazon.co.uk/How-Survive-Thrive-Challenging-Times/dp/B088T5L251/ref=sr_1_1?dchild=1&keywords=piers+cross&qid=1609869608&sr=8-1

For more videos please visit: http://youtube.com/pierscross

For FB: https://www.facebook.com/pierscrosspublic

For Piers' website and a free training How To Find Peace In Everyday Life: https://www.piers-cross.com/community

Many blessings,

Piers Cross

http://piers-cross.com/

Today I wanted to offer some reflections about the mother wound and boarding school.

I share some insights I had from last weekend's boarding school retreat which we were filming for our documentary Boarding on Insanity. 

I talk today about how boarding school creates a mother wound. 

Our mothers are no longer there for us. 

I share some teachings from Joy Schaverien and other experts in the field of the Mother Wound. 

Take care, Piers 

#motherwound #trauma #boardingschoolsyndrome 

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Piers is an author and a men's transformational coach and therapist who works mainly with trauma, boarding school issues, addictions and relationship problems.

He also runs online men's groups for ex-boarders, retreats and a podcast called An Evolving Man.

He is also the author of How to Survive and Thrive in Challenging Times. To purchase Piers first book: https://www.amazon.co.uk/How-Survive-Thrive-Challenging-Times/dp/B088T5L251/ref=sr_1_1?dchild=1&keywords=piers+cross&qid=1609869608&sr=8-1

For more videos please visit: http://youtube.com/pierscross

For FB: https://www.facebook.com/pierscrosspublic

For Piers' website and a free training How To Find Peace In Everyday Life: https://www.piers-cross.com/community

Many blessings,

Piers Cross

http://piers-cross.com/

In today's video I talk about what is complex PTSD, complex post traumatic stress disorder or CPTSD. 

I draw upon the work of Dr Judith Herman, Pete Walker and Dr Gabor Mate. 

What is it? 

And what are the seven diagnostic criteria for Complex PTSD? 

I have been reading Pete Walker's book in more depth recently and have been struck by how similar boarding school syndrome is to complex PTSD. 

Reading the seven diagnostic criteria from the psychiatrist, Dr Herman, really helped me to make that connection. 

If you would like to me to talk more about complex PTSD please do let me know. 

Warm regards, Piers 

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Piers is an author and a men's transformational coach and therapist who works mainly with trauma, boarding school issues, addictions and relationship problems.

He also runs online men's groups for ex-boarders, retreats and a podcast called An Evolving Man.

He is also the author of How to Survive and Thrive in Challenging Times. To purchase Piers first book: https://www.amazon.co.uk/How-Survive-Thrive-Challenging-Times/dp/B088T5L251/ref=sr_1_1?dchild=1&keywords=piers+cross&qid=1609869608&sr=8-1

For more videos please visit: http://youtube.com/pierscross

For FB: https://www.facebook.com/pierscrosspublic

For Piers' website and a free training How To Find Peace In Everyday Life: https://www.piers-cross.com/community

Many blessings,

Piers Cross

http://piers-cross.com/