The Uncurated Life Podcast (Cindy Guentert-Baldo)
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| Pub. Date | Title | Duration | |
|---|---|---|---|
| 09 Sep 2019 | Where Will I Be In Five Years? #75 | 00:21:17 | |
Where will I be in 5 years? Where will this online community be in 5 years? How do I continue to be unapologetically myself without succumbing to what other people want from me? These are the questions I tackle, thanks to my friend Miche Navarro’s submission to my form, in today’s episode.
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Cindy Guentert-Baldo 4225 Solano Ave. #601 Napa, CA 94558
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| 20 Dec 2021 | 141 | The Myers Briggs Personality Test | 00:16:38 | |
It’s time for another personality test, this time one of the big players… the Myers Briggs!
Colorful words may be used. don't be alarmed.
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TRANSCRIPTIONHey, everybody. Welcome back to the uncurated life podcast, where we are always talking about our lives and how we live them on the internet. And one thing that happens on the internet is people talking about their personality types from various personality tests. I believe this is the third episode that I have done in this series.
The previous ones I've done where any. And the, uh, DIC tests I believe. And so this will be number three and it is the, um, one of the behemoths of the personality test world. And that is the Myers-Briggs test. Now a quick disclaimer, I tend to be cynical about personality tests, but I am doing my best to be open-minded when I take.
So just know that right from the start. I also have not taken it yet. That will happen during the recording of this podcast. Now, before I get further into it, I just want to let you know that if you have not already checked it out, we are heading into the new year extravaganza over on my YouTube channel with all of the bullet journal setups and planners, lineups, and stacks and goals and all the things.
So just be sure to check it out. It's linked in the description below. Now let's, let's talk a little bit about this test is also known as the M B T I test the Myers-Briggs type indicator. It's a personality test that is based on the, um, Jungian psychological type theories, Carl Young, uh, it was developed by Isabel Myers-Briggs and her mom, Catherine Myers.
They wanted to, I guess, bring the youngian theories. Into, like a place where people could use them, like make them useful. So this is an excerpt from the Myers-Brigg dot org, like the official website, it's the, uh, their explanation about Carlos. Personality type theories. The essence of the theory is that much seemingly random variation in the behavior is actually quite orderly and consistent being due to basic differences in the ways individuals prefer to use their perception and judgment and quote.
They took this idea and his theories and everything, and turn them into an instrument that can be used. You can do your self-assessment online, which is what I'm going to do today. Or you can find people that are trained in it that they can assess you and help you figure out what your personality type is.
And there are 16 different personality types, um, based on four different. Aspects of, of personality and how you, you, you judge ship. So this is also from the Myers-Briggs website about the basics of the instrument, and they excerpt this from the MTBI manual, a guide to the development and use of the Myers-Briggs type indicator.
Favorite world. Do you prefer to focus on the outer world or on your own inner world? This is called extroversion E or introversion. I sets the first letter. This is me talking the first letter of the four letters in the personality type. Next is information. Do you prefer to focus on the basic information you take in, or do you prefer to interpret an ad?
Meaning this is called sensing S or intuition and decisions when making decisions do you prefer to first look at logic and consistency or first look at the people in special circumstances. This is called thinking T or feeling F. And then structure in dealing with the outside world. Do you prefer to get things decided or do you prefer to stay open to new information and options?
This is called judging J or perceiving P your personality type. When you decide on your preferences in each category, you have your own personality type, which can be expressed as a code with four letters. And quote, and that actually lines up. A lot of people I think are inf PS or I N F J's I think in the planner world, at least I think that's what I've seen.
A whole bunch of studies have proven this is, this is important because when I said at the beginning, how cynical I am about personality tests, a lot of it feels like, like if I'm in a certain mood, I'm going to score a certain way. Right? Like, how is it actually. Well, according to the Myers-Briggs website, studies have proven this test to be both valid, meaning that it measures what it says it does, and reliable meaning that you get the same results if you're given the test more than once.
So I'm assuming that this is supposed to be one of the more like accurate personality tests, but I have no idea so far in looking at the other two tests I've done. I have had thoughts, both in terms of how it felt right. And how it didn't feel. Right. So we'll see how this one goes. If you are interested in taking the test, I'm going to link the one I am taking below.
It's the MTBI online.com test, which is the one linked from the official website. It's a $50 test. It's not cheap. I'm sure that there are. Less expensive versions, but I'm, I'm, I'm going with this one. I'm paying for it for the podcast. Thanks to my patrons who are sponsoring this episode. Uh, because I just, I feel like I want to take the one that is the most quote official.
I'm assuming. So. But you can, I'm sure Google and find other versions. So what I'm gonna do now is I'm gonna stop recording and I'm going to take the test when I'm done. I'll let you know how long it took me. And then we will talk about the results. All right. So it only took me about 15, 20 minutes to complete the assessment and I'm a speed reader and I got a phone call in the middle of it.
So. I finished. And it's taking me through a 30 minute module to learn about the personality types before it tells me what my personality type is. So I thought I would pop on and kind of bring you with me mainly because maybe this will help interpret it. So they're talking about personality type being made up of four elements, the way you direct and receive energy, the way you take in information, the way you decide and come to conclusions and the way you approach the outside world.
And they say that the, the two elements in the middle taking an information and the deciding and coming to conclusions are what make up the core of your personality, because that's what makes up all your mental activity. Right? So you, you collect information and then you have to decide what you're going to do with it.
Right. So as we move on, It's talking about basically like taking information, being the, what you are aware of, what you perceive, how you perceive it, what information you look for, what information you rely on, what information is important to you and what you tend to notice or not? No. And then coming to conclusion is how do you come to your decisions?
What process do you make? What do you rely on when you make a decision? How do you arrive at your opinions? What kind of decisions do you like to make? What consequences do you consider, how you do evaluate the opinions or decisions of others, and then the two other parts of this, the way you direct and receive energy has to do with how you get energized, how you focus your energy, what drains you and how you like to be in contact and talk to it with other people.
And how much of that. And then the other one is approaching the outside world, meaning like, how do you structure? How, how much structure do you want or need? What do you do with new information? How do you approach tasks and what information do you want before making decisions? Now they said that there's four pairs of opposites.
And we talked about this at the beginning, the outside, the energy being directed towards the outside world. Or the inner world taking an information that is real and tangible that you can perceive or seeing the big picture and patterns and interrelationships making decisions. It's either logic or personal and social values.
And then approaching the outside world is decisiveness with planning versus flexibility and spontaneity. So the terms that they're talking about, we talked about already the introversion extroversion, all of that. Now the preferences. They talk about the difference between using your preferred hand and your opposite hand.
When you use your preferred hand, it's easier. It takes less energy. It can be done faster. It feels natural, right? And your opposite hand, unless you're ambidextrous is harder, has more energy is more awkward, et cetera. So it says that you can do both, but one is easier and you prefer to do it more. Right?
So. Each of the opposites have their letters. We talked about that at the beginning, there are 16 different personality types based on the four. Like basically if you think about like a four by four square and each way is the four letters, the, um, that describe the energy, the information, the conclusions, and the outside world.
And then it said here, when you look at your type description, the whole is greater than the sum of its parts. Extroverted thinking is different from introverted thinking, a person who is sensing the judging preferences is someone who prefers sensing and perceiving. So the way that the elements of your personality type interact with.
Makes each of the 16 personalities different. So it's not just each letter. It's also how they interplay with each other. All right. This next section is about choosing preferences and I actually have to make some choices here, so I will stop the recording for a second, but I will reiterate what it says here on this page, which is a, this is not a test B, there are no right or wrong answers.
See, there is no way to pass her. And D everyone has a personality. So I will be back in a few once I'm done with this. All right. So I just went through and based on both what they said about each section of the personality type and they provided a shit ton of examples. I reported myself as an E N F J and the.
Answers from my questionnaire were E S F J. But the difference between the end and the S was, it said it was all the way from very likely to very, not likely, somewhat likely blah, blah, blah. And it was very soft, like very, might be likely an S. And so then, You can read this. And which do you think is more correct?
So the two types that they give the T the basic rundown is an E S F J, which is what the test gave me was warm-hearted talkative, active cooperative, and conscientious want harmony in their environment and work hard to establish it, notice what others need and try to provide it. Always trying to do something nice for someone, an E N F J was warm sociable.
and empathetic are highly attuned to the emotions needs and motivations of others seek and find the best in everyone. I want to help everyone fulfill his or her potential can act as catalysts and provide inspiring leadership and looking at those, I think E N F G. Is much more along the lines for me. I wish I was someone who would provide harmony, but I don't think I am someone who provides harmony.
So I'm going to hit continue, which means this is the one they're taking for me. And I'm amazed that cause basically the only letter that was different, everything else was like extremely likely. It was that other one that was soft. So now it says, go to your dashboard to find out select areas of interest so we can customize your experience.
Well-being personal development relationships. I'll go with personal development. One. Now that you have your result. There are a bunch of courses. There's a whole bunch of shit here. So I guess the 50 bucks does get you a lot. Um, so it's giving me a whole bunch of like mini courses that I can take because of my type.
So it says here that I am a competitor. Facilitator you are highly attuned. I mean, look at results here. Compassionate facilitator, warm, empathetic, and responsible. You tend to take notice of other people's feelings, needs and motivations. You see the potential in everyone and try to help others to grow and develop, to reach their goals.
You're loyal and sociable, and you tend to be responsive to praise or criticism from others. You're often a natural and inspirational leader. Cindy's characteristics, collaborative, expressive, friendly, and responsible work in home. Harmony is very important to you. Holy shit. Like I just finished recording a couple of other episodes.
This is going to come back to it. I did this one last because of the test, but yeah, harmony is very important to us. And then I'm seeking my guys. You'll often work hard to maintain cooperative collaborative relationships between your colleagues, friends, and family. You'll usually have a genuine interest in other people want to work towards a humanitarian vision.
Focused on helping others to achieve their goals or fulfill their potential and use your insights and curiosity to explore possibilities that support the ideas and people around you. You, my potential blind spots are that I might find it difficult to emotionally detach yourself from situations are focused on specific details.
Yes. Avoid problems or disagreements to prevent conflict. That's a big hell. Yes. And help others without giving them an opportunity to learn for their. Uh, huh. How others are likely to see you supportive nature, curiosity, empathy at your best. They see you as energetic and enthusiastic. You tend to move steadily into action.
Persuasively bringing other people along like this feels like me. This feels right. And I would suggest that I think this feels more right than the other two tests that I took. This feels very much like me, especially when it comes to the blind spots and, um, and some of the other aspects of who I am. So it says that that, uh, Some ENF Jays may have many definite sheds and should nots, which they express freely, sometimes annoying others.
Like that for me is an absolute yes. Right? And if they have not developed their feeling preference, their decisions may be inconsistent and poor, poorly formulated. And that used to be me. So that again makes, makes a lot of sense to me. It also says that. They are energized by people and are socially adept.
And all I will say with that, that's probably the one spot, but it's, I always knew this extrovert versus introvert part would be a little different because I do get energized by people until I'm not like I hit a wall and being socially adept really depends on the situation. I can be very withdrawn depending on kind of where I'm at, but I think that, that goes back to the J part, which is the.
The part of me that needs to be organized and be on a schedule and be in habits. Like I kind of flopped back and forth between like blah, blah feelings and all these things and things must be in their right place. And so I think this really expresses that well, so yeah, overall I think this is very interesting.
Um, I really want to dig into some of these. Classes and things that are on here since I've paid for them. I might do that. And if you want me to, I might report back on some of those. Let me know, just message me on Instagram or post to Instagram stories. Tag me at Lama letters. Let me know your personality type from the Myers-Briggs.
And also if you would like me to dig deeper into this and give a review on whether or not it's worth the 50 bucks. Um, but. This has been fun. I am curious to see what the next one will be. I have a list of other personality tests again, post on Instagram. Let me know if you have tests. You'd like me to check out during this cynic's guide, the personality test series.
I feel a little less cynical about this one, because this feels fairly active. Anyway, once again, thanks to my patrons for sponsoring this episode. They are rad. And if you want to be rod like them, go to www.patreon.com/cindyguentertbaldo to find out more. And until next time, my friends, I hope you have a lovely week.
Take care of yourselves until next time. Peace out. | |||
| 30 Nov 2020 | Documentary or Historical Fiction? The Response To The Crown Season 4 | #125 | 00:22:52 | |
I am fascinated by the reaction of people to The Crown's season 4, especially in how people are treating Prince Charles and Camilla, Duchess of Cornwall.
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| 14 Sep 2020 | You Can Take A Break | #119 | 00:04:44 | |
It's okay to step away from things that are causing you mental distress.
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| 06 Dec 2021 | 139 | I Suck At Challenges | 00:13:45 | |
I have a confession… I suck at challenges.
Colorful words may be used. don't be alarmed.
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TRANSCRIPTIONI've got a confession to make my friends. I really suck at challenges. Hi everyone. Welcome back to the uncurated life podcast. And today I just, I need to talk about this. I need to tell you about my suckiness at challenges and why I think that might be why you might suck at challenges and what I think might happen as we move forward.
But before I do. Just a quick reminder. My shop will be closing this Friday, December 10th for the rest of 2021 to avoid any mishaps with shipping because the shipping world right now is a shambles. So I want to make sure that if you have anything you want to order for gifts or anything like that, that you get them in time, at least as best as I can control it.
So yeah, if you have any orders you want to put in. Of like prince or whatever, whatnot for the holidays, make sure to get them in by the 10th. I will still continue to ship out until I'm done shipping out, but that's when everything's going to close and then I will reopen it in January. Anyway, move forward.
Sucking the challenge. So here's the thing, here's the irony of this situation. I have been hosting two challenges for several years now. My alum love lettering every damn day challenge, which encourages you to letter a little bit every damn day to get practice, because it's the only way you're going to get better.
Right. And the other one is random doodles, which I just started doing myself before. It was a challenge and people liked it. So I started doing that. And again, it's meant to do a little bit of doodling every day to get better at it right now. In the last year or so though, I haven't actually participated in either of my challenges.
I have created them and posted them. I have sometimes set up a section of my bullet journal to do them, and then I don't do them. And one just it's like, am I bored? Like, what's the question here? What, why, why is it that I put the effort into putting these out there? And then I don't do them. Well, first of all, I will add that I put them out there because other people ask for them, but I I'm just not into it.
And you would think, okay, we'll find one that you're into, but I haven't really done that either. So. To kind of start this when I'm talking about challenges, what I'm referring to mainly is creative challenges that you can find on the internet, like creative type challenges, geared towards getting you to do something every day, something specific for a specific amount of time.
Usually because they want, the challenge is geared towards you getting practice at something, building a habit of something, helping you find inspiration. Blah-blah-blah, there's a bunch of challenges out there, including some that are relatively well known, especially in creative communities. Like the a hundred day project where you pick some kind of creative thing and you do it everyday for a hundred days.
The new one is starting, I think in January. And I have been considering doing it, but doing it on my own terms. But ironically, again, I'm doing an episode about how I suck at challenges and then thinking, oh, but maybe I'll do that now. Who fucking knows another one? That's pretty well known in the art world is ink Tober.
Where are you going to list of prompts? And you're supposed to draw something with ink every day, for a month with the, the idea, being that by drawing it with ink, instead of penciling in, you have to like, go with what you draw rather than make I making mistake. I don't know something like that anyway. So my challenges are a month long and therefore lettering and doodling, like I said, The idea here is to, especially to get in the habit of something.
If you do something every single day for a month or for a hundred days, or whatever, the chances of you building a habit are higher than if you weren't doing anything at all. I vibe with that, I vibe with the idea of doing a little bit of something every single day to build the habit I vibe with somebody else, giving you creative prompts to help you like spur your creative.
I held a vibe with the idea of practicing every day, because it's the only way you're going to get better. And I make my own challenges because I think that it's fun to get different people's perspectives out there. So why do I suck at actually doing them? I started to try and brainstorm why I thought no, I'm going to also say upfront.
I don't think I have any answers in this video. I'm sort of musing here to try and figure some shit out, but I will tell you. Maybe my thought process will help. Like you may be able to light something in you, and then you can tell me because you found the answer and then we'll all be happy. I don't know.
But the first thing that kind of came to mind was the length of time. So there have been times where I've set myself a challenge for like a week and I've usually done pretty well with that. So maybe I need a weekly challenge. Maybe, maybe doing something for a month or for a hundred days is just too long.
And I just need something to inspire me for a week. Maybe that's it. I don't know. But maybe for some people, a week's not long enough, maybe it's what I'm doing. So one of the things I learned with the a hundred day project was if it's too complicated, I'm not going to do it. If it's something I feel like I don't need to do.
Then I'm not going to do it. I have to be really, really interested and engaged with what I'm doing to have a higher chance of following through and not getting bored with it. So I'm similar to those people who, when I was a kid, I would like bounce like a hummingbird from hobby to hobby. I be super into something and then I would drop it like a bad habit and move forward.
Right. And that's eased a little bit as I've turned into. It ha I still do some of that, but I, it has eased a little bit, but I think it's still manifesting itself in how I approach things like challenges. When I did the a hundred day project the last time it was the farthest I'd ever gotten. I think I got like halfway through it and it was because I gave myself a five minute timer.
I spattered some ink or something on a paper, and then I'd make flowers out of it in a quick timeframe. I think what maybe held me up there was that I was filming it everyday for Instagram, making something content, I think is another way to quickly kill a challenge for me. Does it require me to be in a certain place if it's a creative situation and this is actually something I'm running into with my planning situation at the moment as well.
And it's something that I, I talked about in a recent plan with me. I am trying to kind of come to terms with the fact that because I don't want to work on Saturdays and all of my planners and all of my, everything are down in the basement, which is very much my office. I'm not likely to go down there.
So I kind of lose the thread on Saturdays and. I want to figure out a way to do that. And I don't know if that means separating my personal and work planning completely from each other, because right now there's somewhat separated and keeping my personal planner upstairs and not in the basement, except when I'm actually planning out my week.
That might be a thing I don't know yet, but like, If it's creative and it's something I'm supposed to do every day. If I have to come to my office on like, I'm trying not to do that on Saturdays, because once I enter my office, it's like, it sucks me in like a fucking wormhole when I was living in Napa.
And my office was in the middle of everything. It was a little different, but here, because I'm like walking down into the basement, it's like being summoned to the office alter and it's a little, a little, not what I want on a damn trying to fully take off. Another thing. That's something I've been thinking about is like, why, why am I doing it?
Am I doing it to get better at something? Am I doing it out of a sense of obligation, which is how my challenge has felt for a while. There was a while where I was putting the framework in my planner this last year to do my lettering challenge. But I think I was doing it more out of a sense of obligation.
Like, okay, well I created these challenge. I should do them because otherwise, like, am I a poser? I don't know. Am I doing it to keep up with the internet Jones? You know, I think that when I did December daily or when I limped through the first few days of December daily, a couple of years ago, maybe three or four years ago on flood during blog MIS I think I did it because everybody else was doing it.
And it felt like material for blog, miss. And I was like, I'll probably really like it for getting that my entire life scrapbooking has never been successful for me. Any sort of like scrapbooking, any memory keeping I've tried that before, and it just never seems to work for me. And yet I still. Do it. And so I wonder, like, what is my motivation?
Like is my motivation? I think I'll enjoy it or I'll be good at it. Or is like deep down is my motivation. Like what everybody else is doing. It's I got to keep up with the internet Joneses. I'm fucking fallible. And I am quite susceptible to this shit. You guys, I know that if you're doing a challenge, Situation like that, especially if it's a month or longer, there are going to be times when you're over it, but I ideally you would be all in on it.
So you push through, right? Like when you're doing anything like that, there's going to be times when you're in chanted with it. And then there's times when you're like, fuck this, but the fuck, this moments in order to get through them, you need to be like invested in all in, on not only the process, but also the outcome.
And I don't think I've ever been invested enough. Maybe I'll be invested in the outcome, but not the process or vice versa. I don't think I've found the magic for me of being invested in the why I'm doing it, how I'm doing it, where I'm due, although like the, who, what, where, when, why, whatever fucking shit.
Like, I think that kind of applies to challenges, especially creative ones. And if you can't fulfill enough of those. Then when it gets boring or it gets annoying or it gets tedious. What incentive do you have to finish it? I'm pretty sure that for me, with most challenges I have attempted ever since I started this online.
Been doing things like creative for the public man kind of a situation that my biggest incentive was to not look like an ass because I stopped doing it. When I'm posting on Instagram, that's not a good enough reason. So. I need to like really think is there, do I a, do I need challenges in my life at all?
And B if I do, I need to find one that is, is something that I can be invested enough in, in enough ways that when my tendency to slack off on it or to stop doing. Comes up that I have a reason to keep going enough to push me through keeping going. And if you're hating something and you're miserable doing it, don't fucking do it.
But like, I'm not talking about hating as much as I'm talking about just general annoyance, I guess. So I don't have an answer. As to why I suck at challenges, except maybe that is the answer, right? Maybe it's just, I've just not invested enough in doing them. I'm invested in creating them for you guys, but I'm not invested in actually doing them myself at the moment when it comes to lettering practice, I'm not invested in it because I do enough of that freelance wise to keep me fresh.
I'm not invested in. Like the doodling as well. Like it's I do enough of that for work. So maybe the challenge I need is something that's not work-related so that maybe I can exercise my creativity in another way, but then I need to make sure I've defined why it's important to me, why the outcome is important to me and why the process is important to me enough.
So that, that will help sustain me when I get to the boring part. As for my challenges, you may be asking, why are you still going to do them if you're not invested in them? And I'm not sure yet, I'm not sure if I'm going to keep doing them as of January, or if I'm going to change them, combine them, do something else.
I'm not really sure yet. I know that this year doing the Spotify playlist was so much fun for the lettering challenge and the little scenes for the doodling challenge has been a lot of fun, but I'll be honest. I am burning out on creating them as well. And so I may put those on hiatus and try something different, but I'm not sure yet.
So stay tuned for that and make sure you follow me at Lama letters or check out my newsletter and my website. Everything's linked in the show notes because that's where shit like that is going to pop up. So like you'll, you'll find it eventually. But in the meantime, I'm going to just be okay with the fact that I, I suck at challenges and that I would like to find one that resonates with me, but I'm not going to stress myself out about it because.
W I don't need to keep up with the internet Joneses. I am totally fine. Just doing what I feel like doing. And if everybody and their mother loves doing like all the Allie Edward shit, cause that seems to be where the internet Jones is, tend to hit me. Then Allie Edwards your life away, but I don't really feel like doing it and I'm not good.
And I'm okay with that. If you resonate with this, please share it on Instagram because I would love for other people to find this, because I'm sure there are more of you out there that attempt to do a challenge and then suck at it. And they're like, why the fuck do I suck at this? I feel like I'm not the only one.
So if this resonates with you, share it on Instagram, tag me at Lama letters in your stories, and I will look for it. I'll look it up. In the meantime, don't forget my shop closes this Friday. So check it all out. Everything's linked in the show notes. And until next time friends have a great day and peace out. | |||
| 05 Oct 2020 | It's Complicated... | #120 | 00:06:28 | |
Dude, I am having so many thoughts and can't figure out how to express them.
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| 31 Jan 2022 | Things I’ve Learned in 42 Years | 147 | 00:19:42 | |
Today is my 42nd birthday and while most of the time I have NO idea what I’m doing, today I’m sharing 42 things I’ve learned in 42 years!
Colorful words may be used. don't be alarmed.
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TRANSCRIPTIONHello, everybody. If you know me at all, then you know that I live for my birthday purely because of getting to sing the it smell birthday song from Thor, Ragnarok, which I will leave linked down below if you have not heard it. But yes, today is my birthday. I'm actually recording this a little ahead of time.
So it's not my birthday yet, but when you hear this, it will be my 42nd birthday. And so today, My myself, Cindy Guentert-Baldo. I'm going to be leaving you with 42 pieces of wisdom things I've learned in the past 42 years that I thought would be interesting to pass on. Some may be fun. Some may be deep, some may be obvious, but yes, 42 things I have learned in 42 years starting right about me.
Number one wear sunscreen. Even if you don't plan on going outside, make sure it goes on the back of your ears. Make sure it goes down your neck. Make sure it goes behind your ears. If you wear your hair up in a ponytail, make sure it goes on the back of your neck. Don't neglect your hands. Sunscreen. My dudes so important.
Number two stretchy jeans can save you from an accident. If you have mom, bladder, kidney disease, and a sudden urge to go to the bathroom. I swear if I don't have to pee. And then I'm within like sneezing distance of a bathroom, suddenly my bladder goes into overdrive. And sometimes unbuttoning your flight takes too long.
So there is magic in stretchy jeans when you are basically running to the bathroom to try and not pee your pants. And I know you're like, but Cindy, what about using like the ask asked it gasket the toilet cover no dudes there isn't time for that. If I'm trying not to pee, I will just have to live with like squirrely fucking.
Stuff on my butt cheeks, because it's better that than the PB in my pants. Number three, plastic glasses, frames, beat metal glasses frames any day of the week and twice on Sunday, especially if you're allergic to nickel, both because I've known. At least in my experience with metal glasses frames that they snap in the middle way more often, my dad used to solder my fucking glasses together in high school.
The other thing is that if you're allergic to nickel and you have metal frames, like the bows of your glasses are metal. If they rub on your face, you will get the worst fucking rash that then develops into like an open situation. It's awful. And the way we dealt with that was paint my glasses. Clear nail Polish, except that also wears off.
And then the situation happens again. I used to think plastic glasses were heinous because the first pair I ever had made me look like Sally, Jesse Raphael when I was a fucking fourth grader. And now I'm like plastic glasses all the way there. They're the best of right. Nothing's going to ever give me a goddamn nickel allergy reaction on the side of my face when I have to wear them to see, I sound like I'm ranting.
I'm not ranting. And these are just things I've learned. I swear. If you're going to be prone to impulse shopping, if impulse shopping is something that you, you, you tend to do on a regular basis, steer clear of trader Joe's during the holiday season. I'm not even going to talk about how I got suckered in this year.
And I used to work there and I know better number five. And this is one that I learned after being kind of a douche and unknowing douche, but a douche nonetheless, don't wear perfume to acquire. Or to anywhere where you're, I mean, I know this is pandemic time. We're not really standing in like close quarters with anyone right now, but you never know who you're going to trigger with like a heavy scent and inquire, especially when you're breathing in like large gulps of breath while you're singing.
The worst thing is to trigger an asthma situation or something with somebody. So just skip the perfume on choir rehearsal days. Number six. Some sushi restaurants are more heavy on the wasabi when they make their new Geary. So then the Gary is like the piece of rice at the chunk of little, little, little rice situational.
Bundle. And then there's a piece of fish on top. Right. And what they do is they use a little bit of a Sabi to kind of like glue the fish to the rice, but it also adds flavor. Well, the place we used to go to didn't use very much wasabi. So I didn't even know there was wasabi there. Good with spicy things.
We went to a different restaurant where they used a lot more with Sabi, and I thought somehow my rice had been dipped in chemicals and I was freaking out only to find out no, there was just more wasabi. So just know that someplace, if you think your, your new Geary's tasting a little off and you're not used to the wasabi, that's probably it.
Of course it also might be the fish being gross. So keep an eye out for that. Number seven, getting into arguments while driving makes that argument way more intense than it needs to. I don't think I have to say any more for that. I think that is self-explanatory number eight. The most important part of a relationship is communication.
Not sexual energy, not things you have in common, not. Any of that shit it's communication because there are days when there isn't going to be any sexual energy. And there are days when you're not going to be feeling very into anything. But if you are able to communicate how you're feeling with the person or people that you're in a relationship with, whether it's romantic or it's platonic communication is the thing that keeps relationships going.
Communication can help you with apologizing. It can help you with explaining yourself all sorts of things. So if you're going to work on developing anything in a relationship that you really want to solidify, the communication is a big piece of that. And that's something that I have learned in recent years, and I am so grateful to have learned it and to be with somebody who not only is good at communicating themselves, but as good at helping me communicate when I'm not in a good communicating space, which is pretty much anytime I'm upset.
Number nine when somebody tells you who they are, believe them. Now, this applies not only to assholes is assholey around the internet, but this also applies to people who are telling you their pronouns or their gender identity or their sexuality fucking believe them. Don't tell them it's a phase. Don't think it's a phase.
Just believe them until they tell you otherwise. And they may never tell you otherwise because they may, this is my, this is who they are. And as a side note to that, This shit is fluid people evolve. They change, they come to greater understandings of who they are, and if somebody tells you their pronouns or something one day, and then later on, they adapt or.
They grow, they change. Those are none of those are really great words for this, but they like, they come to fuller understanding of who they are and their pronouns might change. That doesn't mean it was a phase. It means they came to a fuller understanding and you should celebrate that. I have no patience for people who take issue with people's that gender identity or pronouns number 10, any cuss word can be better by adding on E R Y fuckery.
Bullshittery all sorts of shit. Like. Yeah, yeah. Country. Oh yeah. That's good too. Yeah. Dickery wankery. Yeah, just keep trying at T just do it. My husband thinks I am whack as fuck, but I tell him that some Whakarae to accuse me of that. Number 11, finding a physical activity that doesn't hurt and is at least somewhat fun.
Can like exercise a little less annoying. I am not saying you might enjoy it. I don't fully enjoy exercising, but when I find things that I actually. Like find a little fun and they don't make me feel like, I mean, they might make me feel in pain in the sense that I worked out, but not like causing me joint pain or like problems with my kidneys or whatever, finding something that does it suck ass for me.
And doesn't like actively make me hurt. It does have. Now, I'm not going to say that exercise is never going to be a, not annoying for me. Right? Like I'm not somebody who probably will ever love exercise, but I have found exercise that I can do on a somewhat regular basis because it met those qualifications number 12.
And I'm saying this with my own personal experience on both ends of the spectrum, ex smokers are probably the most judgy people at current smokers. It's, I don't understand it. If your next smoker, you know how hard it was to quit, like give him a fucking break. Jesus. And I used to be that judgy. I'm not that judge yet.
Number 14 toddler feet look like little pork chops with toes. If you know a toddler or like a nine month old baby in your life, look at their feet. Pork chops with toes. Swear to God. It's, you know, they're getting older when the pork chop with till phenomenon goes away. Yeah. That's, that's a sad moment.
Number 15 speaking of babies, don't spend hella money on cute baby clothes. Whether you are somebody who is pregnant, somebody who is adopting somebody, who's going to become a parent for the first time of a baby shaped child, somebody who is giving gifts to somebody else who is going to become a parent.
Don't spend hella money on cute baby clothes. They're going to grow out of them before they ever come close to being worn out or even worn at all. They're going to puke all over them. Who explosions at the back of their diaper, just spend money on bulk bulk little sleepers, things that they can wear that are inexpensive, and that you can just throw a bunch of them in the washer because these babies go through way more clothes in terms of growing fast.
And in terms of grossing them out, like babies can be changed multiple times a day when they're little purely because of how nasty they are. If you spend hella money on cute baby clothes, you're doing it for the fucking gram. Even if you don't know that you're doing it for the. There's other things to spend money on for babies like diapers seriously.
And I guess to complete this little trifecta of baby related things, although to be fair, I can't remember. I might have more pop up later, regardless. Number 16, never for the love of all that's holy assume someone is pregnant and say something about it ever. I don't care if the baby is coming out of.
Don't fucking say anything until they say something first, because it fucking sucks to be asked when you're do, when you've just given birth three days ago, and you still look six months pregnant because that's the thing nobody warns you about. Or when you have polycystic kidney disease and you look fucking pregnant, but what you're pregnant with is diseased ass fucking kidneys, or maybe somebody who just happens to have a belly and isn't trying to get pregnant or somebody who happens to have a.
Is trying to get pregnant and having trouble with it. Just don't do it. Don't do it. I don't understand why people think that's a good idea. And as a bonus for this one also don't touch people's pregnant bellies without permission. And I'm hoping that this has died off because of COVID. But if it hasn't, oh my God fucking don't touch someone unless they let you touch them.
They give you permission. Oh my God. Sorry. Number 17. If your vacuum is not sucking well, but heal and you live with any sort of long-haired people or pets, check the brush to see how much of a furball has grown there. I swear, I am logging. Everyone in our house is lawn care. The only people that aren't long haired are the pets.
They're not people, you know what I mean? And Lucy's getting super plush because of the winter. And yet I still get like question mark Pekichu face when I try to vacuum. And the vacuum is not sucking as much as it should. And then Jesse will flip it over and get his razor blade out and cut the giant furball off of it just as.
That's probably the first thing you should check. There may be problems with the vacuum, but there's always a chance that a giant fucking Tribble has grown inside of your vacuum cleaner. It needs to be removed, and I'm not going to do the removing because it grosses me out to touch it. But Jesse does.
Thankfully communication is the key to any successful relationship. Number 18 salt, your pasta water. One pinch is not enough salt. You want to add quite a bit of salt to really add the flavor to the pasta. I'm going to caveat this with, I'm supposed to start reducing the amount of salt I'm cooking with.
So this pains me to say, but it actually is true. Like salting your pasta water really does help number 19, and this may be a personal opinion, but I don't think I've met anybody in recent years who disagrees with me? Red apples, red delicious apples are the worst apples. I don't understand the point of red delicious apples besides being nasty.
And on that note, number 20. Swiss cheese is the red apple of cheese. Fight me on that. Number 21. Earplugs can be a godsend. If you sleep with somebody who snores, just get this mushy ones. If you have the harder ones, they're uncomfortable. I swear your ears will not envelop this mushy ones. This mushy ones can be comfortable and they also can just save your sanity.
If you were having trouble sleep. Also, if you're happy, if you sleep with somebody who snores have no problems, shaking them and waking them up to get them to change their position often that'll help too. But earplugs man, they help. Number 22, grease two is the superior grease. End of story. I can go on an entire podcast about this, but I'm not going to right now.
Number 23, the sniff method of checking on. Yeah, it can be necessary. Right. But it is always risky. Know what risks you're taking when you do the sniff test of laundry, especially, especially if it is not your laundry. And it is the laundry of your 15 year old son, number 24. If you have gas, I'm not taking my car gas and talking about, you know, the gas that makes you go fart in your stomach area, in your abdomen.
And it's not moving. Get on your hands and knees and stick your butt up in the air. You may look ridiculous. And if you do this in front of teenagers, they will laugh at you, but it will help the farts move. I promise you. It also helps us sciatica 25 and I have not tested this. So this is allegedly, but the internet did tell me that if you have the hiccups, you can stop them by sticking a finger up your ass.
I have not tested this to be clear, I have done the eat a spoonful of sugar, and that is sometimes helped, but apparently sticking your finger up your ass can help with the hiccups. If this has ever worked for you. Let me know. I promise to keep you anonymous. This number 26. When someone asks you, if you want to see something.
Think long and hard about your answer before you open your mouth, don't do what I've done and say. Sure. And then regret it instantly. Number 27. If you are a person who menstruates always, always carry something with you, because even if you don't need it, someone else might, and you could totally do them a solid.
Number 28. If you have a headache, drink some water, it might help the headache. You might be dehydrated. And if not getting more hydrated is always a good thing, but drink some water. Number 29 when it comes to kiddies, the belly is always a trap, unless it isn't. But I would suggest to err, on the side of the belly being a trap, number 30 ask before hugging someone.
Don't just hug them. But number 31, if they do say you can hug them, make sure to hug them. Like you mean it don't give them any like namby, pamby hugs, give them like a good solid hug. It, you could make their day. Number 32. You will never change someone to be what you want them to be. And you should never change who you are to be someone that someone else wants you to be.
It's. So don't try embrace people for who they are or move on. Number 33, no one likes being evangelized at regardless of what the subject is. I I'm aware that this might feel like an evangelizing podcast for things that I've learned in 42 years, but let's be realistic. Nobody wants to be evangelized to nobody.
It fucking sucks, dude. Don't do that. Number 34 online fandom online fan communities can be both amazing. Awful. That can be both. They can be both sides of the coin and sometimes they can change from one to the other, in the blink of an eye. I've seen that recently. And it's just something to be aware of.
You might have a community that is beloved to you, an online fan community. And one thing, one piece of media, one comment, one, something can fuck the whole thing up and it's sad and it sucks. But unfortunately that seems to be the life cycle of online. Number 35. And this is something that has become much more present in my life since moving to Denver, but nothing beats a good non-greasy hella hardcore hand cream, number 36, let people like what they like, unless of course what they like is actively harmful.
But generally speaking, just let people like things. Don't tell them why, what they like sucks. Number 36. White Zinfandel over ice during the summer is classy as fuck. And I will not hear otherwise. Number 38, if you're going to take a nap don't nap for too long, because it usually doesn't end out well, like usually feel like crap afterwards.
Number 39. Reading for pleasure is just that don't judge people's non-harmful reading choices. Let them take pleasure in what works for them. They don't have to read a certain kind of literature, a certain kind of book, a certain kind of non non-fiction book. I've seen people say that reading fiction. For losers.
I've seen people say that reading, why is for losers? No, just let people read what they like. If they're reading for pleasure and good for them. If they'll listen to audio books, because that's what they prefer, then good for them. And if they actually don't like to read and they prefer to consume their storytelling or their information in a different way than good for them to my God, I guess this goes back to let people like what they like number 40 Play-Doh does not taste as good as it smells.
Number 41, Bri tastes way better than it smells. Uh, number 42, the last one on this list. And in my mind, probably the most important one. Tell the people that you love, that you love them often. You never know when you might not get that chance. Again, I'm going to repeat that one. Tell the people that you love, that you love them as often as you can, because you do not know when you won't be able to anymore.
That's actually something I learned 20 some odd years ago, but it continually replays out in my life. So I had to add that one and make you all sad. But I'd love to know from you in the comments, any of these surprise you did any of the do disagree with any of these. Let me know. You can tag me at Lama letters on Instagram stories and let me know.
I'd love to find out in the meantime though, a thank you for being here on my birthday. It's my birthday. B, thanks to my patrons for sponsoring this episode and everything else I do. You can check them out at www.patreon.com/cindyguentertbaldo to find out more. And finally you rock. Thanks for being here with me.
And I look forward to having some more turns around the sun with you. Peace out friends. | |||
| 27 Jan 2020 | I'm Turning 40 And... | #98 | 00:15:44 | |
I’m turning 40 this week and BOY do I have thoughts about that.
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| 20 Jun 2022 | 166 | THE TALE OF A PAIR OF SHOES | 00:14:37 | |
Today i'm telling you about my new favorite shoes and how I came to terms with loving them. It's a tale of being chronically ill in your 40s and denying your current situation. • DISCLAIMER Colorful words may be used. don't be alarmed. • NEWSLETTER • Etsy Shop is open! • FIND ME ON ALL THE THINGS YouTube - https://youtube.com/c/CindyGuentertBaldo Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/llamaletters/ Discord - https://discord.gg/Rwpp7Ww Pinterest - https://www.pinterest.com/llamaletters/ Website - www.cindyguentertbaldo.com • STUFF I MENTIONED Inquiries - cindy@cindyguentertbaldo.com | |||
| 27 Jun 2022 | 167 | MID YEAR REFLECTIONS + ANNOUNCEMENT! | 00:13:32 | |
It's the end of June so I thought I'd reflect back on this year so far... BEFORE I actually do all my goal assessing and shit for my channel. I'm also making an announcement so stick around to the end! • DISCLAIMER Colorful words may be used. don't be alarmed. • NEWSLETTER • Etsy Shop is open! • FIND ME ON ALL THE THINGS YouTube - https://youtube.com/c/CindyGuentertBaldo Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/llamaletters/ Discord - https://discord.gg/Rwpp7Ww Pinterest - https://www.pinterest.com/llamaletters/ Website - www.cindyguentertbaldo.com • STUFF I MENTIONED Inquiries - cindy@cindyguentertbaldo.com | |||
| 27 Sep 2021 | 129 | Paying Creators | 00:28:55 | |
Should brands, even small ones, pay creators? Does being paid or receiving free product make a review less trustworthy? I chat about these things today on the podcast in light of the recent drama in the Happy Planner community involving the HP Squad selection process.
Colorful words may be used. don't be alarmed.
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| 25 Apr 2022 | 159 | PHONE ANXIETY AND ME | 00:13:10 | |
I have a list of important phone calls to make and omg I don't want to. Today we talk phone anxiety. • DISCLAIMER Colorful words may be used. don't be alarmed. • NEWSLETTER • Etsy Shop is open! • FIND ME ON ALL THE THINGS YouTube - https://youtube.com/c/CindyGuentertBaldo Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/llamaletters/ Discord - https://discord.gg/Rwpp7Ww Pinterest - https://www.pinterest.com/llamaletters/ Website - www.cindyguentertbaldo.com • STUFF I MENTIONED Inquiries - cindy@cindyguentertbaldo.com | |||
| 09 Nov 2020 | The Power Of The Internet | #124 | 00:09:22 | |
I got some sad news about one of my Patrons today. It is causing me to reflect on the power of the internet.
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| 13 Jan 2020 | Being Rocked By A New Diagnosis | #94 | 00:20:58 | |
I got sidelined by a new diagnosis this week and I want to talk through my feelings about it.
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| 21 Oct 2019 | When Your Day Goes To Shit | #80 | 00:29:35 | |
When you have a chronic illness or other condition, there are often days that get derailed. It’s easy to feel demoralized, easy to feel GUILTY that you’re not getting anything done… and the happy quotes on Instagram and Pinterest don’t help much. How do I deal? Today’s question comes from Lacey at @andromeda_rising - it’s kind of a side conversation to the whole toxic positivity series which will be continuing.
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| 09 May 2022 | 160 | I'M A SHITTY BOSS | 00:19:45 | |
Some people long to be their own boss and work for themselves. I... don't feel the same way, and I've been working for myself for 6.5 years. • DISCLAIMER Colorful words may be used. don't be alarmed. • NEWSLETTER • Etsy Shop is open! • FIND ME ON ALL THE THINGS YouTube - https://youtube.com/c/CindyGuentertBaldo Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/llamaletters/ Discord - https://discord.gg/Rwpp7Ww Pinterest - https://www.pinterest.com/llamaletters/ Website - www.cindyguentertbaldo.com • STUFF I MENTIONED Inquiries - cindy@cindyguentertbaldo.com | |||
| 23 Dec 2019 | Feeling Grinchy During The Holidays | #88 | 00:22:22 | |
Today’s episode is the third in a series of how I feel around the holidays, and in this conversation I lay out not only the reasons *I* feel like a grinch most years, but many reasons OTHER people might feel depressed, ambivalent or unhappy during this time of year… and some things that MAY help.
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Cindy Guentert-Baldo 4225 Solano Ave. #601 Napa, CA 94558
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| 19 Aug 2019 | What's The 411? What's The Hot Gossip? | #72 | 00:21:25 | |
This may not be a gossip podcast, but today I just had to chat about some fuckery I’ve seen around the internet this week.
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Sierra Schultzzie’s Video (BeautyCon) - https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0nKNBHtbUrk Smokey Glow’s Video (Olivia Jade) - https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=o_lLeGG52v8
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Cindy Guentert-Baldo 4225 Solano Ave. #601 Napa, CA 94558
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| 01 Nov 2021 | 134 | New Planner Season PSA | 00:15:31 | |
It’s new planner launch season and I thought it would be helpful to issue a PSA - Planner (come to your) Senses Announcement.
Colorful words may be used. don't be alarmed.
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TRANSCRIPTIONHello, everybody. Welcome back to the uncurated life podcast. It is chilly. I'm drinking a cup of tea, which means it's probably new planner season. And so I thought it would be a good time to, uh, do a P S A. I'm Cindy Guentert-Baldo. Thanks for being here. This is your first episode and you like what you hear?
I hope you will subscribe. I put out new episodes every Monday. And if this is not your first time here, welcome back. My dude. I'm glad to see you. You know, in the internet way, planner season tends to come twice a year, new planner season. Now there are some companies that shall remain. But nameless that release planners every five minutes, but in general, for most planner companies, new planners come about twice a year.
Once it's in the may, June, July kind of area with new planners that are academic based, whether they're for students or they're just for people who like to keep an academic year calendar. That was me for a long time. The calendar year, like year planner coincides with the. Right then the other new planner season is in the fall for the new year.
All of the new, this will be the 2022 planters that run from January through December. And we're in that. Now we're in deep in that now, and this may actually becoming a little late for some of you, but as new planners season generally stretches for a handful of months. I figured that it was about time for a quick chat from your internet.
Or big sister, friend, whatever you want to call me, your internet, voice of reason that you can listen to. I want you be able to listen to this whenever you feel like you're getting swept up in new planner season, whether it's right now or next year, the next time the, uh, the jovial planner company releases 85,000 products.
Like if you need it, if you need to hear this, I want you to be able to listen to it. I'm calling this a planner PSA. It could be a like, you know, planner, season advisory kind of situation. I don't know. However we want to call it, whatever, whatever we want to call it, maybe a planner come to your senses and it.
Whatever the case may be. I want this to be something you can listen to when you're feeling the pull of a whole bunch of things and your brain and your mind and your heart and your wallet are all screaming at you, bruh. And you need a little bit of extra encouragement. That's what this is. So let's get started.
Shall we? First of all, this might be the most dangerous time of year for a planet. When it comes to overspending, when it comes to buying shit, you don't need, like, I'm sure there's other dangerous times of year, but as a planner person who purchases planners this time launch time is like the hardest to resist the most fraught time of year when it comes to how you spend your money and what purchases you make.
And often emotions, emotions get pulled into it as well after. You're probably in need of a new planner for next year. If you're an academic person, this applies during the academic launch season, but like in general, right? Like most people right now are trying to figure out what planner or planners they're going to use next year.
And right when they're having this like crisis, this wondering this like vulnerable time when we're like. We're fragile because we're trying to figure our shit out. And then all of the companies come out with all their new shiny things and all of their marketing and all of the influencers and all of the everything.
And it's just bombarding us. You know, that when you're on social media, you start keying all those targeted ads for the new planner. You even potentially thought you might want. And unlike other times, when you might find yourself buying shit, you don't need for no apparent reason other than marketing at this time of year.
The thing that makes us extra vulnerable, extra fragile is that re feel kind of justified, right? Like I know I need a new planner. I know I'm going to need one. So of course I'm going to have to buy one. So I'm justified in buying shit, but eleventy million planners really, really. Are you actually going to use those really?
So like my first thought and my first kind of thought for you is to think about the method of only buying shit on launch day launch day, whenever a new planner launches or a new version or a new edition launches only buy shit on launch day. If, you know, you're gonna to use it, you've already decided, for example, the power sheets launch for affiliates was a few weeks ago and I'm recording this and I bought shit that day.
I don't know if I'm using power sheets next year. I'm in a current planner crisis when it comes to that, but I knew I was going to review them. So I knew I had a purpose for them. Now, at the point, you're going to hear this power sheets launches are already passed, but. Found yourself buying, you know, $60 planner on the off chance you might use it.
That's the kind of buying decision that I want you to try and back away from. If you know, you're going to use them something and then launched it up by the ship, by what you're going to buy. But if you aren't sure don't get swept up in the hype because that's what it is. It's hype. And in 99% of cases, The shit you want is still going to be there in a couple of weeks after you've considered it.
Now that isn't to say that there aren't certain designs or whatever of something that might sell out, but if you don't know you're going to use it, that doesn't matter how pretty the design is. Keep an eye on things in case they're coming close to selling out and really ask yourself if you're going to use it, but don't buy it on launch day.
If you're only curious, because you'll probably spend more money on shit you don't need just from the excitement that is marketing. It's all it is is marketing. In the same vein when shit does launch and you're buying something, let's say we'll use the power sheets example again, let's just say, you know, you're going to use them.
You've used them before. You're going to use them again, buying them as a no-brainer, but then all the accessories are out. Again. Just be very careful there. Don't let the excitement of all the new things cause you to buy shit. You're not going to use. Okay. Um, the reason I keep emphasizing this is because sometimes you have the stuff in your cart and all you need is for somebody to remind you to double-check and think, am I actually going to use this?
Do I actually need this? And that's enough for you to like back out. I just, I hate when people spend money on things and regret it because. We're in a capitalist society and money is a resource that is necessary to exist in this society. And it sucks when you spend it on something and then have regrets, but also there's the, the situation of more shit than you need, which will become more waste or more whatever.
Like it's just, it's perpetuating this like over consumption lifestyle that we're all sort of being exposed to by the media, by social media, by everything. And. You know, little changes. It's not that we're going to change the world by making little changes, but at the very least you might make your life a little less unsettled or uncomfortable or overwhelmed.
My next tip. And this is an important one, especially when you're thinking about launch time and buying your next planner. If you are in a place where you don't really know what you're going to do yet is to do the work ahead of time, start thinking about what it is you think you'll need, not which brand you think you'll need, but what system you'll need.
Do you need a weekly, do you need a daily? Do you do most of your planning and Google calendar and just need something that you want to be able to do? Art or memory keeping or lettering practice or whatever. Don't let brand marketing tell you what you think you need and want actually assess what you've been using.
What has been working, what hasn't been working, so that you have a better idea of what you might be looking for. And then you can narrow things down. For example. Generally speaking daily planning is not for me. I tend to prefer a bullet journal for like rapid logging my tasks for the day and a weekly planner to visualize my week a daily printed planner has never really worked for me, but if the marketing for a new daily planner, like the new Moxy life daily planner really starts to creep into my mind.
I might decide, oh, Hey, maybe I should. That except I know I'm not going to use it because it doesn't work for me. If you struggle to discern what kinds of planners or what systems you might be wanting? I have a Skillshare course called finding planner peace that may help you with that. And I will leave a link to it down below.
It's a Skillshare premium class. If you're not a member and you've never used it before, my link will get you, I think, a free month, right? But like, I just I'm an affiliate, but I specifically designed that class over around how to help you figure out what planner you might be best suited for. And it's not necessarily brand specific, but it will give you some kind of ideas of which way to, uh, which way to turn, check the link in the show notes.
Another tip is to set a budget and stick to it. Like if you say this is how much I can afford to spend on planners and new planner accessories for the next year, stick to it, that will help you a not buy more shit than you're comfortable buying. And B it will make you. Thoughtful in terms of what you actually purchase, because if you're only allowed to spend X amount of money, you're not going to be blowing it Willy nilly on 15 different planter companies coming out with their cool shit, because you might buy something and then regret it.
And the thing you really wanted comes out later. So just set a budget, stick to it, and really like, be considering of how you're going to allocate each of those dollars or whatever. When it comes to influencers and influencer types, if you want to support them. Like me, when you do purchase, look and see if they have an affiliate link, it doesn't cost you anything.
And it helps them, uh, like make a little tiniest that much, but a tiny bit of money on the side, especially if they have helped you figure out what it is you like, like that's one of the things I do appreciate is when. Other people review planners ahead of time. So I can get an idea of what it is that I would like to buy.
And if my whole reason for doing planner reviews is so I spend the money so that you don't have to like, hopefully by me spending the money, you get to look at what it is and make the decision to not get it. And then you're not going to waste your money on it because you are. But if you decide to use an affiliate link, if you want to, if you don't then fucking don't like this, do what you're going to do.
And I'm totally cool with it either way. But on the flip side of that, if the same influencers or influencers in general planner, creators, whatever the case may be, if they make you want to spend all the money without thinking about it, maybe you should mute them during launch season. I've given this advice before and I mean it for me, Unfollow unsubscribe.
The mute is one of my favorite buttons in Facebook and Instagram, because you can shut somebody up for a while and they don't even know you're not going to offend anybody by and following them. They don't know you can't see their shit. And if you want to see it, you can still go see it, but it stays out of your feed.
And I promise you, there are people that I mute during launch season because I am just, I can't handle it anymore. Totally. Okay. And a fantastic tool. If you are a. Avid user of social media, like I am, and you need to get a break from it so that you can make your decisions about things with a little bit more thought.
And finally, I'm going to say this, and for some of you, you may be like, duh, and for some of you, you're going to be like, thank you. But it's an important thing to remember. You do not need all of the things. Most of these planner things are. And you can redate shit. You can go through the effort to re date shit and re and use it and make sure it doesn't go to waste.
But like that sucks, dude. That's a lot of effort. So before you make any planner purchase, ask yourself, will I use this during its intended timeframe? And if the answer is no, are you going to be willing to alter it in order to actually make it work and use it and not waste it? And you need to be honest with yourself when you ask yourself that, because if the answer to that is no.
And I know for me, it is, I can promise you right now that while I will slap date covers down on a planner, I will never read date a planner. And when it comes to undated planners, the jury's out. I generally speaking, I'm not a fan of undated planners, but because I'm lazy. But like, if that's your thing, then that's your thing.
But the question here is if you can take a hard look at this potential, this potential purchase, and be honest about whether the likelihood of you actually using it. That might help you from buying it because you don't need a wall of planners. Yeah. There are people on the internet with a fucking wall of planners.
I have a wall of stuff. I do planner reviews, but like, there are people who are part of affiliate programs are part of like squads or whatever who gets sent all this shit. They didn't have to pay for it. And if they did have to pay for it, there's like a certain level of elite ism that comes with having a wall of fucking planners.
You don't need that. You do not need. My hope for you. This planner season is that you are able to be thoughtful about the decisions that you make to not regret the money that you spend. And you make sure that everything that you bring into your house is coming into your house because it has a purpose.
You got this, I believe it. I think you're going to have a great time this planner launch season. And if you need any extra encouragement, find me on Instagram at Lama letters. I'll fucking encourage you. You got this, make sure that you check out that Skillshare class, if you need some extra help and don't forget to jump onto my monthly newsletter, I'm going to keep reminding you guys about this because I, I am.
That's what I'm doing, right. All of this stuff is in the show notes. Thanks to my patrons for sponsoring this episode. They love it when I do anti-consumer content I'm generalizing, but I think they do. You can check out my Patreon at www.patreon.com/cindyguentertbaldo to find out more, make sure you listen to this.
If you need an extra kick in your pants, this planner launch season stay safe. And until next time friends peace out.
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| 05 Aug 2019 | A Quick Update | #70 | 00:08:19 | |
Today’s episode is just a quick update on how I’m doing, what I’m planning for this podcast in the next couple of months, and an opportunity to request what I talk about!
This episode is sponsored by my Patrons. Learn more by checking out my Patron Page!
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Cindy Guentert-Baldo 4225 Solano Ave. #601 Napa, CA 94558
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| 13 Jul 2020 | I'm... Back? | #110 | 00:05:33 | |
Am I back? I hope so!
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Cindy Guentert-Baldo 4225 Solano Ave. #601 Napa, CA 94558
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| 31 Jan 2020 | My Great Shame | #99 | 00:04:58 | |
It’s my birthday and I want to talk about… my teeth.
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| 07 Mar 2022 | I WANT TO BE BORED | 152 | 00:20:43 | |
I never thought I'd hear myself say this, but holy crap, I would love to be BORED. • DISCLAIMER Colorful words may be used. don't be alarmed. • NEWSLETTER • Etsy Shop is open! • FIND ME ON ALL THE THINGS YouTube - https://youtube.com/c/CindyGuentertBaldo Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/llamaletters/ Discord - https://discord.gg/Rwpp7Ww Pinterest - https://www.pinterest.com/llamaletters/ Website - www.cindyguentertbaldo.com • STUFF I MENTIONED Benefits of Boredom - psychologytoday.com/us/blog/science-choice/202004/5-benefits-boredom How To Be Bored - https://zapier.com/blog/benefits-of-boredom/ Under the Influence Podcast - Inquiries - cindy@cindyguentertbaldo.com TRANSCRIPTIONHello, my name is Cindy Guentert-Baldo, and I need to be. Welcome to the uncurated life podcast, or we talk about life both on and off of the internet. If this is your first time here, I am so excited that you're here. And if this is not your first time here, thanks for coming back today. We are talking about boredom and why I need to be bored and why I somehow cannot manage to be okay with being bored. It's a thing that I am coming to terms with. I just got off of a three-day weekend and I had some moments where I got bored and immediately turned to candy crush. I'm actually going to be talking a little, you'll be hearing a lot about candy crush over the next few episodes, but like, it was like, I couldn't just sit and be bored. And I realized that this like constant busy-ness in my mind. Is one of the things that is contributing to my massive sense of overwhelm. It occurred to me that maybe I need to embrace boredom just a little bit. So let's talk about being bored. Why is being bored? A good thing, because it sounds like a bad thing, right? Like when you're a kid being bored is like the worst possible thing ever, you know, like, oh my God, mom, I remember my kids being like, what can I do? What can I do? What can I do? And I'm like, you can fuck off. I didn't say that, but I wanted to. One of the reasons I think being bored really can frustrate a lot of us is because when you're bored, it's like time moves slower because you're not constantly busy, constantly. Everything else shit starts to drag. And then as soon as you get wrapped up in something and suddenly it's flying by. But I realized with as quickly as like February has flown by for me, uh, maybe being bored and having that time going slow could be a good thing. There's an article. I have a link and the articles I talk about in the show notes, this one is from psychology today. It's by a Dr. . He wrote an article called the benefit five benefits of boredom. And so I'm just going to read through them really quick. The first benefit of boredom is that boredom can improve our mental health. So according to the article, It says that in this age of information, our brains are overloaded with information and distractions. The wealth of information means a scarcity of attention. Attention uses one's limited cognitive resources for productive activities. So taking a break can be a valuable opportunity to help our overloaded brains relax and alleviate stress. It is beneficial to step away from social media and other stressors long enough to feel bored and quote. So right here is something that I think is a distinction between. What I'm doing and what I might maybe should be doing. I'm okay. With stepping away from social media and from other things, I can do that for a few minutes. I don't think I do it long enough to get bored, because I think the moment I'm starting to even brush against the idea of boredom I'm right back on my phone or I'm right back in my book or I'm right back, whatever. So there's a podcast. I'm sure you've heard of it. If you haven't. It's awesome. It's called under the influence. One of the things they're talking about in the newest season is in the fall having a day where women exit social media for a day to show the power that women hold over social media, it doesn't really talk about non-binary or other people, which is something that I've actually been curious about. And I want to message them, but the idea here is to step off for an entire day. And I was listening to her talking about, and I'm like, that's a great idea. And then I was like, do I think it's a great idea because I want to show the power that women have over the internet and like the internet economy, or is it that the idea of just not being on social media is. Refreshing. I don't know, but this idea of stepping away from it long enough to be bored. So not just stepping away from it, but step away to actually our board. It's not something I'm including in my March goals, but it might be something I start to think about. Come. The second benefit to being bored. According to the article, boredom can increase creativity and can provide an opportunity to turn inward and use the time for thought and reflection. Boredom can enable creativity and problem-solving by allowing the mind to wander and daydream. People were in one study, people were made to do boring tasks like reading reports or attending tedious meetings, the boring tasks encourage their minds to wander, which led to creative ways of thinking. The study showed that with mundane activities, we discover useful ideas in the app. External stimulation. We use our imagination and think in different ways and quote, this was kind of where the boredom came from. For me, the idea this, this particular benefit was the one that was at top of my mind when I was thinking about wanting to be board, was that one of the things I want to do this year is more hobbies and really stimulate my creativity outside of work so that it can like benefit my whole life. And I'm just not bored enough. I don't think to really let some of those newer ideas start from. One thought process I had when looking at this article was like thinking about being in high school and being in a class that, or a college middle school, whatever, being in a class that I really wasn't into. And I was a nerd. I was into most of my classes, but there were classes I wasn't into. And so I would start doodling and I'm a child of the nineties. So often those doodles were like the Stussi S that special S or drawing Tweety bird, or Marvin, the Martian. If you are a child with it, like if you were a teenager in the nineties, you know exactly what I'm talking about, the cover of my trapper keeper and so on and so forth. But I was, I would do some of my most fun doodles when I was that bored. So this makes a lot of sense. The third benefit to boredom, uh, from the article, boredom motivates a search for novelty without boredom. Humans would not have the taste for adventure and novelty seeking that makes us who we are intelligent, curious, and constantly seeking out. The next thing, novelty seeking implies dissatisfaction with the status quo and a willingness to challenge established ideas and practices. Great achievements are facilitated with dissatisfaction with the status quo. And I'll tell you right now, this is when I read this benefit. I was like, oh fuck. Yeah, because I am both an very intense creature of habit. Like I get stressed out if my routines and my habits are funny. But I also do get frustrated when I'm doing the same old, same old for too long, in certain aspects of my life, especially creative aspects of my life. I've always been somebody who kind of bounces like a hummingbird from hobby to hobby. And I think that this idea of novelty and seeking out new and interesting experiences is something that I am really trying to lean into this year. But it's kind of fighting against my nature. I want these things, but my nature is to stick, be a homebody stick to the things I know through teens. I know the status quo is comfortable for me. And so stepping outside of that is difficult. And I'm thinking if I can get bored enough, that might motivate me to do it in a way that just saying, I want these things. Does that make sense? I wonder if it does, it's making sense to me, at least from the article, the fourth benefit of boredom is that boredom motivates the pursuit of new goals. Boredom is an emotional signal that we are not doing what we want to be doing. Being bored means we are currently engaged, not only. Uninteresting or challenging situation, but also in a situation that fails to meet our expectations and desires, boredom encourages us to shift to goals and projects that are more fulfilling than the ones we're currently pursuing. And here I think is maybe the crux of why it's so hard for me to be. Generally speaking, I am not in an uninteresting or unchallenging situation with my life. We moved to Denver that in and of itself is challenging. Right. But I, my family has some challenging health problems right now, but I'm relatively happy with the state of my life, with the things I'm doing with whatever. I don't feel very. Dissatisfied with my life. What does she say in the breakfast club? My home life is unsatisfying or my home life is satisfying. And I recognize what a privilege that is, but maybe that's part of why I don't tend to gravitate towards boredom aside from the fact that I've always been someone who just can't manage to not be busy. I also am someone who is relatively content with the state of my life. And so maybe that is one of the reasons why I don't have that, like, kind of wanderlusty achy feeling. And the fifth benefit of boredom, according to the article is boredom and self-control skills boredom affects the ability to focus and pay attention because the interest is lost among students boredom results in disengagement, from class and poor performance, they can feel bored when they lack the cognitive resources to focus. The ability to focus and self-regulate is correlated with the ability to handle boredom, learning, to endure boredom at a young age. Great preparation for developing self-control skills, like regulating one's thoughts, emotions and actions. Yeah, man, like that makes sense. I have always been someone who feels like their brain is moving at a million miles per hour, often faster than I probably want it to. And boredom has always been really stressful for me. And so trying that maybe that's why meditating has never really worked for me. Cause I get fucking bored and I'm like, no, I don't want to do this. I want to do something else. And so I'm thinking by facilitating some boredom in my life, maybe that will help me a little bit when it comes to focus issues I have in other areas, maybe I don't know. Anyway, so I. I was doing some more research into the idea of boredom, right? Like, cause I was like, I know I want to be bored. I know that being bored is something that's almost like aspirational to me. I've joked a lot about when Jesse and I finally go on our honeymoon, even though we've been married for fucking what, like eight years now, I don't even know. He, he knows I'm not good at remembering these things, uh, by seven had a honeymoon yet. But my goal honeymoon is to go somewhere, maybe tropical, where I can like lay by. Like in a pool, be in a pool where the water is filtered, but be in sight of the beach where there's no wifi, so I can be bored, but that's my dream honeymoon. And. I wonder sometimes if I might hate it when I actually do it, because I'd be like, fuck, I'm so bored, you know? But this idea of being bored to me just feels right. It feels like if I can just manage to get to a point where I'm like, fuck dude, I am so bored that it might help me kind of rocket ship off into more interesting or new to me, experiences and things. So I was like, okay, well, if I really want to be bored, and if being bored is something that I've actively pushed against my whole life, then how do I get there? You know, that's, that's easier said than done, but one of the things I came across was another article that was on Zapier, which I think is an app that lets you like connect things to get out of whatever the article is, what I'm here for by Emily Esposito. And it's about the art of being bored, how to be more productive by doing nothing. And the specific thing I zeroed in on where the types of boredom, because if I can identify with the type of boredom I want, maybe that will help me get there. So the five types of boredom that she talks about were developed by a team of German. Researchers led by Thomas guts. They wanted to dive deeper into the types of boredom. And so they did a bunch of research. They studied high school students and college students asked them to answer questions over the course of a couple of weeks. And. They identified five different types with unique characteristics. These types are in, I'm going to read from the article number one in different perhaps than most neutral of the five people with indifferent boredom are calm and withdrawn from the world. They use the words, relaxation and cheerful fatigue to describe. Number two is calibrating boredom, which refers to wandering thoughts and not knowing what to do. You want to change your environment or behavior, but aren't actively finding alternatives. This type of boredom is common when. Performing repetitive tasks. Number three is searching boredom, which is defined by a sense of unpleasant restlessness and an active search for ways to minimize that boredom using two, usually turning to activities and thoughts about hobbies, leisure interests in school. Number four is reactant boredom, which is characterized by feelings of aggression, reacted, boredom, motivates people to leave the boring situation and avoid those responsible for it. People experiencing this type of boredom have persistent thoughts about specific, more, highly valued alternative situations. And finally, there's apathetic. This type of boredom operates at a different level than the previous four. It's a deeper, more negative state of mind that can be linked to feelings of helplessness and depression as well as destructive behaviors. So when I'm looking at these five, I would say that when I am bored, I tend to be in the world of. Calibrating boredom where the wandering thoughts and not knowing what to do and apathetic boredom, which is where I go when I'm in a really not great place. And that is, um, that tends to trigger some of my anxiety and depression. So I think what I want is to bring into my world more of the calibrating board. Which is the board and the happens with repetitive tasks and the indifferent boredom where I'm bored, but I'm okay with it. Like I'm just, I'm, I'm, I'm relaxed and I can just be bored and be okay with it. So that's what I think I want to really search for. They offer in this article, a couple of ideas of how to do it. And the first one is about choosing activities, right? So there's a bunch of mundane tasks we have to do on a daily basis, whether they're work-related or house related or whatever the case may be. And the point that the article makes. And I super agree with this is that there are some tasks that. Feel mundane and repetitive, but you still have to focus. The example they bring up in the article is building a pivot table and analyzing data. It's boring and it's tedious, but you have to focus on it. You can't like. You can't let your mind wander right now for me, a task like that would be, uh, prepping vegetables. Now I find chopping vegetables to be kind of relaxing. However, I could also get easily bored by it if I'm just not in the right spot, but I have to pay attention to what I'm doing. I can't let my mind wander or I'll chop my finger off. You see what I'm saying? The other thing the article brings up is that there are tasks that. Are relaxing. That can be confused with boredom. I brought up earlier that meditation makes me bored, but they say that meditation is actually meant to promote tranquility. The idea is to remove the distractions and rid your mind of stimulation. Whereas boredom is when you're trying to find the stimulation and you can't find it. I don't know. I'm still pretty bored by meditation, but the point is, is that might not be the way to find it a. A task that they bring up. That would be a really great example of a way to bring up that like boredom of doing what is the calibrating boredom of doing repetitive tasks is like stuffing envelopes for something like, if you're doing wedding invitations or we were doing life campaign with their, my church to send out things for donations or whatever, stuffing envelopes, definitely a boredom inducing situations. So coming up with ideas, like for that, for me coming up with like a boredom list, I'm going to maybe put that in my bullet journal in March makeup of board and list. I'm gonna write that down. I'm gonna write down a boredom list of activities that I can do that will kind of take the stimulation out to. But give me something to keep me occupied so that my hands are working, but my brain can wander. The second thing they suggest is to banish distractions, which is the one we were already talking about with removing your smartphones. One of the people referenced in the article is Sandy Mann, who is a psychology lecturer at the university of central Lancashire. And she said, That we're trying to swipe and scroll the boredom away. But in doing that, we're actually making ourselves more prone to boredom because every time we get our phone out, we're not allowing our mind to wander and to solve our own boredom problems. So the suggestion is, is to take your, don't take your phone out when you're standing, waiting for something like I do this all the time. I was standing, waiting around. I bust out my phone and I play a little candy crush. The idea here is to. To not to start getting the habit, whether you have to put an app on your phone or something else of not whipping your phone out in those little Mormon moments where you could be bored. So that's something to work on. I might turn that into a habit for April as well. I don't know. And then the other situation, the other idea they bring up, and this is one that I need to take to heart, and that is to stop overbooking yourself. You know, don't accept. Meeting. Don't always be going out strategically block off boredom time in your calendar. You know, some people would say leave white space in your calendar, but this idea of like making sure various time for you to get bored. It says here in this article, uh, for some, uh, minutiae Zomorodi in a GQ article said that being bored is like the stuff that feels super uncomfortable. If you're not used to it, like going to the gym, it really hurts at first. But then you start going maybe three or four times a week and it gets a little easier and maybe you get a little hot, a little exercise high in the sweat starts to feel good and it suddenly becomes part of your life. So the idea is to. Treat boredom like a muscle and train it so you don't lose it. And then you can go find your boredom, find your time, spend that time being bored and make it a habit. Making boredom a habit. That's also a good idea. I should write that down. I'm going to make myself a little list. I'm going to make myself a little list. I want to make a boredom list and I want to do boredom habit. I better write those down. Those will not be in my March video. Cause I already filmed it. You probably already seen it at this point. However, I will be talking about that more come April. I think, I think that is going to be a focus because like I said, in the title of this, I want to be bored. Now what about you? Do you want to be bored? Are you going to try some of these things? Are you going to seek out the boredom in your life? I'd love to hear your thoughts on it. Go to instant. Tag me at @llamaletters in your story. And tell me your ideas, the things that help stimulate your boredom. Are you trying to be bored? Do you think I am losing my shit for wanting to be bored? Let me know. I'd love to hear about it. This episode was brought to you by my patrons. They're fucking amazing. If you want to know about Patreon, go to www.patreon.com/cindyguentertbaldo to find out more. And in the meantime, my friends, I hope you find some time this week to get a little bored. I'm hoping I can too. I, I don't know if I'm going to be able to or not, because this week is, you know, a busy week for me, but we shall see wish me luck. I'm wishing you. Well, And until next time, peace out. | |||
| 04 Oct 2021 | 130 | High School Bullshit | 00:17:16 | |
This episode is kind of a part two to my last episode (129) - we’re going from paying influencers to high school bullshit in the planner community. Or at least ONE aspect of that. More to come in the future on this topic I think!
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| 03 Aug 2020 | Airing My Petty Grievances | #113 | 00:16:38 | |
It's Festivus In July! Today I'm venting about some petty (and not so petty) stuff that is annoying me lately. | |||
| 17 Jan 2020 | Why Do You Plan? | #95 | 00:03:46 | |
Maybe it's the prednisone, but I've been really annoyed this week and have wanted to ask the same question all over the damn planner internet.
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| 20 Jul 2020 | I'm Sorry For Being Sorry | #111 | 00:07:28 | |
Is your first instinct to apologize, regardless of the situation?
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| 20 Jan 2020 | Losing Momentum And How I'm Dealing | #96 | 00:12:25 | |
What do you do when you get derailed? How do you react when you seem to lose momentum, especially if it is something completely out of your control? Today I'm talking about my recent experience being diagnosed with gout just as I was ramping up into the New Year.
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| 02 Dec 2019 | Disney+ & Being A Hater | #86 | 00:06:48 | |
Some food for thought this Monday morning about hating something for the sake of hating it.
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| 31 Aug 2020 | Toxic Positivity During This Pandemic | #117 | 00:32:41 | |
The global pandemic has triggered a wave of toxic positivity, and I want to talk about it.
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| 07 Sep 2020 | Deep Thoughts With Cindy | #118 | 00:22:46 | |
Have you ever sat and let your mind wander to whatever deep thoughts come out of your brain? Have you ever written them down? That's what I did this week, and today I'm talking about them!
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| 30 May 2022 | 163 | PARENTING TEENAGERS IS COMPLICATED | 00:15:47 | |
I've got an 18 year old and a 16 year old and today I'm gonna vent for a bit about how complicated parenting teenagers is. • DISCLAIMER Colorful words may be used. don't be alarmed. • NEWSLETTER • Etsy Shop is open! • FIND ME ON ALL THE THINGS YouTube - https://youtube.com/c/CindyGuentertBaldo Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/llamaletters/ Discord - https://discord.gg/Rwpp7Ww Pinterest - https://www.pinterest.com/llamaletters/ Website - www.cindyguentertbaldo.com • STUFF I MENTIONED https://www.unitedcounselingwellness.com/blog/family-therapy-parenting-teenagers-why-is-this-so-hard Inquiries - cindy@cindyguentertbaldo.com | |||
| 21 Feb 2022 | REFLECTING ON LOSS | 150 | 00:19:46 | |
It's been a long time since I lost my parents - 20 years for my dad, 15 years for my mom, and still grief is a constant companion of mine. In today's episode I am reflecting on my own grieving process and what it looks like, so many years later. • DISCLAIMER Colorful words may be used. don't be alarmed. • NEWSLETTER • Etsy Shop is open! • FIND ME ON ALL THE THINGS YouTube - https://youtube.com/c/CindyGuentertBaldo Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/llamaletters/ Discord - https://discord.gg/Rwpp7Ww Pinterest - https://www.pinterest.com/llamaletters/ Website - www.cindyguentertbaldo.com • STUFF I MENTIONED Prolonged Grief Article - https://hms.harvard.edu/magazine/aging/profound-sadness-prolonged-grief Inquiries - cindy@cindyguentertbaldo.com TRANSCRIPTIONI'm going to open this episode up with a quick trigger warning. Um, I'm going to be talking about loss in this episode, loss of parents specifically, um, and. So, if that is something that you are not in a place to think about right now, then I will not have any hard feelings. If you choose to just move onto something else. May I suggest a previous episode I had recently where I talked about my self-care stuff, because that could be a good thing to reflect on instead. Let's jump into it. My name is Cindy Guentert-Baldo. Welcome to the uncurated life podcast, where we talk about how we live our lives, both on the internet and off of the internet. And one thing that I think hasn't changed in the age of the internet is great. I don't think it has fully changed. At least I'm sure it has evolved in some sense, but we as humans grieving as a part of life, because loss is a part of life. It, we are we're social animals, right? We don't, um, we're not meant to be in a complete silo on our own for our entire lives. There are going to be people who come into our lives and go out of our lives. And when they go out of our lives, whether it is via. Just moving on, whether it is via breakup, whether it is via drifting apart or whether it. Death. When people go out of our lives, there is usually at least some amount of grief. There's also grief that we have for ourselves. When like something changes. We evolve, we change jobs, we move there's a change in our lives. And there is often a level of grief that comes with thinking about. Your previous life, even if you're happy with your new life, there is sometimes a level of grief that comes with that new part of you today, specifically, though, I am going to be reflecting on grief and loss. When it comes to losing somebody very important to you. For me, it was my parents and what it feels like so many years later, because. When it's immediate, it's not always easy to think into the future, how you might be feeling. And I want to speak to the perspective of that, especially for people who might be grieving right now, so that you can kind of hear about it from somebody who is farther down that path. So to give you some context, um, my dad died 20 years. I was 21. He was 40. It happened right after September 11th happened. He died of a stroke. He had a brainstem aneurysm brought on by PK D, which is the kidney disease that I also have. And he, he had a brainstem aneurysm. He went brain dead and we had to take him off of life support. Five years later. So 15 years ago almost to the day this podcast is going live, like it's right in this week, my mom died. My mom died suddenly in her sleep. We never found out what the cause was. The autopsy didn't show anything. She just died when they each time. When my dad died, I was 21 in a new relationship with my soon to be husband. And then ex-husband when my mom died. Um, I was the parent of both of my kids at that point. My oldest was three and my youngest was just about to turn one. My baby sister was pregnant with her oldest. Right around that same time, we actually wound up having to move Becca's baby shower because my mom's funeral wound up being on the day of Becca's baby shower. I didn't deal with my grief very well when both parents. Either of them. I am the oldest of three sisters and I very much went into mama bear mode. My mom, when my dad died, fell apart, she, he was her high school sweetheart. They'd been together for 21 years at that point. I mean, they've been married for 21 years at that point and she was not expecting to lose her husband when she was 40. And then when my mom died, It was like, fuck, really? Like, we just, just did this, you know, so both times I kind of pushed my grief off to take care of others and then it came back and it hit me like a freight train later, especially when I had cat, uh, after my dad died, I had cat a couple of years later and, um, the postpartum depression hit me really hard with a bunch of unresolved grief. It took me a good amount of time to really not be in like full blown meltdown, every few minutes mode. But as the years have gone on. It's evolved. Now, when I was doing some research for this podcast, before I started recording it, I actually learned about something called prolonged grief, which is not what I have. I'm not going to suggest that I have that, but it is interesting. And if you are somebody who is, who is more than a year out from a big loss and it still feels real, like it just happened every single day. You may have prolonged grief, prolonged grief is an actual thing. So I'm going to read, I'm going to read kind of a description of it. Prolonged grief generally presents as an inability to adapt the loss. You wake up and feel like it's brand new over and over again. Uh, it was added to the, um, diagnostic manual of mental disorders saying that it is grief that persists for one year or more. And according to the article I found, uh, prolonged grief. One of the hallmarks of it is that usually. Usually the treatments that are used for like people with like severe depression, don't work on people with prolonged grief. It's, it's different than that. And it can actually bring increased health risks, but they are starting to work on it and work on specific treatments for prolonged grief. Are more effective. So if you are somebody where the grief feels raw and fresh every minute of every day, even more than a year out, definitely seek help for prolonged grief because that's generally speaking when you lose someone, grief is not the same for everybody, but it does start to evolve. As time goes on and we adapt to it. And that's what I want to talk about because that is where I'm at and where I've been for several years. So the best way I can describe being 20 years out from suddenly losing one of my parents and then 15 years from the other parent is that it's become my. It's become one of the many companions that kind of ride alongside me every day. They don't, they're not very talkative. That particular, that grief companion is not talkative, does not stick, like is not constantly whispering in the back of my mind. Like some of my other companions are, you know, But, but it's there. One of the things I have learned in these past years is how to recognize the things, the triggers that will bring that little grief companion to the forefront. Because what I have learned is that I have learned to live with it. It has not become over time. It is no longer the first thing I think about it is no longer at the forefront of my mind. But it's there. And when it does get brought to the surface, it hurts and it hurts in so many ways that are similar to the way it hurt. When I lost my parents, even that pain has been blunted just a little bit. But rather than a constant low grade feeling of grief, it's more like, kind of quiet. And then every once in a while something will happen and it'll bring it to the surface and I'll have a good cry. And one of the things I've learned over the years is to keep an eye out for the things that tend to trigger it now, to be fair, there are often things that trigger it that I'm not expecting. And then I get hit with an unexpected wave of it. But generally speaking, I can tell there are certain kind of specific things. One is certain Elton John songs. I've made no secret of the fact that I love Elton John and B. There are certain Elton John songs. I can't listen to without crying like a baby. I have I can't picture things in my mind. I can't picture my parents' faces. My dad loved Elton John and he loved to play piano and sing Elton John songs. And when I hear goodbye, yellow brick road and Daniel, which are the two hardest ones for me, goodbye, yellow brick road and Daniel. There's a few others as well, but those two are like the top. When I hear them, it's like, I can smell my dad again. I can, I can smell him. And it's visceral and it just sends me, I don't actually have something like that for my mom. I don't have something that just full blown Rex me the way, the way that that does. Well, that's not true. I have a recording of my mom singing Patsy. Cline's. If I listened to that, that wrecks me. But I wonder if the reason that I am so, like my it's memories of my dad that really sent me because you know, my mom and I want up having a really closer, close relationship as adults as I started having kids, even though she moved away, I there's two reasons. I think my, my grief from my mom is not quite as visceral as my grief from my. A I lost my dad when I, he was my first major loss. I had lost like great-grandparents and shit. And like a friend in high school, my aunt had had cancer, but survived it. But like, my dad was my first real loss and I was 21. And then I got diagnosed with PKD right afterwards. So it threw me for a loop. So there's that, but also, and I think this one might be a bigger piece of it. I never got closure with my mom, my dad, we saw him in the hospital. He, we all got a chance. My, my mom, my sisters, I was living an hour and a half away. They came and got me. We went to the hospital, we all got to see him. My dad's siblings got to see him before he died is still living ones. My grandparents were there. Like everybody got to say goodbye to him before we pulled the plug. My mom died in her sleep in Bakersfield, down in Southern California. We never even saw her body. We saw her after she was cremated. So there's a level of like unreality, I think. Whereas with my dad, it was much more like in your face. And so I think that might be part of it, but I'm not sure. I guess that big, the reflection that comes out of this though, is I find it extremely important to recognize the things that, um, can trigger a wave of grief. Although I will also say that when I do cry, like there have been times I've purposefully put on Elton John songs to have a good cry because it's cathartic, you know, it doesn't send me into a deep depression the way you used. So if you're a deep in grief right now, that might be something for you to hang on to, to know that grief might be horrifying to you right now and, and unwelcome. But that the way I see it now, when I grieve either of my parents or both of my parents, whether it's a super hard cry or whether it's just like a wistful thought. It's a reminder of how much I loved them and having that strong feeling still bubble up even 20 years later. It's it's, it's a reminder to me that I. I loved them and that they were a major part of my life. You know, part of the thing I'm really reflecting on today when I'm recording, this is that I'm 42. I was 21. When my dad died, I have officially reached a point where I, uh, have lived longer on this earth. Well, I've lived as long, probably not longer yet because it hasn't hit his anniversary yet. But I'm at a point now where I've lived as many years on this earth without my dad, as I did with him. And it hasn't changed the things he taught me or the memories I have or the way I still think about him. I don't grieve my parents every day, but I think about them every day throughout the course of my day in natural way. And that's also comforting to me when I cry, when I smell. Cause like I said, the Elton John songs, another big trigger for me of grief with my dad is the certain scent. It's a mixture of like, like motor oil and pot, which my dad smell cigarettes too. Sometimes, especially when I'm doing, like getting my car worked on, I catch a whiff of that smell and it throws me. But again, It's just a reminder. There were a lot of times with my parents where things were hard. We grew up in poverty, like lots of hard times, but the love I had for my parents and the love and the memories, all the hard things, they're still there. And I remember them and I think about them when I need to, but like, I'm able to reclaim a little bit of the joy. And I think that was one of the hardest things when I was deep in the initial stages of. Was, it was very hard for me to really find joy in memories because all I could think about with my memories was how much I missed the people I lost. And now that that grief has evolved into being something I can predict a little bit more. I'm able to really embrace all of the memories and even embrace the grief. You know, when I started to think about doing this podcast episode, I was thinking I could reflect on, okay, 20 years later, this is kind of where it's at. And I think as I've been sort of talking through this with you all, I think the thing I'm really reflecting on the most is that the best way I can describe losing someone close to you. Suddenly, I don't, I don't know about with a long illness. The people I've lost in my life with long illness have not been as close to me as my parents, but I lost both my parents suddenly. So I don't know for sure about the feelings that come with like caregiving and survivor's guilt, but what I will say, the reflection, I think that my biggest takeaway from this. Is that I welcome my little grief buddy. We've learned to live with each other. We've reached, we've reached a, a mutually beneficial relationship. We have figured out a way to co-exist and find some amount of benefit. I welcome. The memories of my parents now I welcome the times I cry and I welcome the times when it's hard. And I remember them because again, it just reminds me of how much I loved them. Now I recognize. That grief does not always take that form for people that your grief might be complicated because he might've had a complicated relationship with someone. And I recognize how lucky I was that the issues that we had growing up were not something that traumatized me to a point where, like, I couldn't wholeheartedly love my parents. I had phenomenal parents. They weren't responsible. They weren't great with. But they loved the shit out of us and taught us to be healthy and how we love people. So I recognize that everybody's grief is different and that sometimes it can be more complicated than that, but I can't speak to that experience because it isn't the experience I've had, but I can speak to the experience of being 20 years out from a major loss and having it still cut down. But that those cuts remind me. They bring me back to a time when I had someone I loved so deeply in my life and that I can be 21 years out from it. And still to this day. Remember how powerful that love was in my life. And that is the lesson I take from my grief. And that is the reason I'm fine with metal grief, buddy, hanging out in the car, even if they're quiet most of the time. And I hope that if you're grieving someone right now that one day you'll be able to come to peace with your little grief buddy, too, but just know it's a process and that there's nothing wrong with. For being where you are. And then if you are struggling with acute grief, more than a year after the fact, talk to your doctor about potentially having prolonged grief, you don't have to suffer. You can work. There are things you can do anyway, with all that being said, I'd love to hear from you about your experiences with grief. Let me know, and thank you to my patrons for sponsoring this episode as usual www.patreon.com/cindyguentertbaldo to find out more take care of yourselves. I love you. Big hugs. I might go listen to goodbye yellow brick road now and give myself a good cry, but I'll be welcoming that good cry until next time, my friends peace out. | |||
| 25 Oct 2021 | 133 | My First Personality Test - DISC? | 00:18:16 | |
People have been asking me (for years) about my personality type. What enneagram am I? What other random test situation? I have actually never really paid attention to all that, so now I’m starting a series where I take a personality test and discuss it! Today it is the DISC test, an OLD one from the 1920s mainly used in business.
Colorful words may be used. don't be alarmed.
https://view.flodesk.com/pages/61525a85337f1c2aacf52f6d
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DISC Test - https://www.123test.com/disc-personality-test/ Info on the test - https://www.ionos.com/startupguide/productivity/disc-assessment/
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TRANSCRIPTIONHey, everybody. Welcome back to the uncurated life podcast. Today is the first of what I think is going to be several personality test episodes. I'm Cindy Guentert-Baldo. And if this is your first time here, welcome, I would love it. If you subscribed and hung out. Hopefully after you're appearing all of this today, you'll be fine with that.
And if this is not your first time, welcome back. If you want to take this test and you haven't before it'll be linked in the show notes, let's get right into it. As a preface. I have had so many people since I've started doing YouTube and everything else. This whole online creator situation, I have had so many people ask me what type of personality I am, what Enneagram I am, what fucking I N G P w.
Five that I am. I don't know. I don't actually do a lot of personality tests because I don't usually have the patience to sit down and do that. I have taken some of, there was one quiz I took a long time ago that maybe I'll try and find again where you're supposed to answer a bunch of questions about your values.
And then they take every all like a hundred and something religions, and then they decide which ones you're the closest to. And I remember doing that in my top three. We're secular Quaker, Unitarian Universalist, which is what I became and secular humanist, which is also what I said that there's that maybe I'll do that one again.
See if it's. Maybe add that in the political test, whatever, but personality test wise, the one or two that I've taken was like decades ago. And so I thought that this would be a fun little segment to have on the podcast every once in a while, because personality tests are in my mind, both garbage and interesting.
So I'm fine with both of those things, right. You should have heard last week's episode. When I talked about the Lula rich documentary. Which is garbage and interesting. Right? Anyway, so I am going to take the test today and then I will report back afterwards. So I'm not going to fill my, I'm not gonna record myself actually taking the test because that could take a long time and it might skew the results.
But I'll talk about the test. I will pause the recording, take the test, and then immediately afterwards report back on what I found and what I think about. Okay. I think that's going to be interesting if you think this is a cool format or a good idea, please let me know at Lama letters on Instagram, let me know in the stories.
If you take the test as well, let me know what you get. I'm so curious. And if you know of personality tests, you'd like me to try. I would love it. If you let me know in the DMS on. Also, just as reminder, if you haven't signed up for my newsletter, it is where I am giving you guys monthly peaks into everything you can reply to it.
And I can take your in your info interest. Can I talk now on which personality test to try or what podcast episodes you would like the info for that is in the show notes and October's freebie is currently available unless it's not October anymore than it might be a different freebie. You'll find out anyway.
Let's move forward. Today's test is an old one and it is the D I S C test. I pick this one because it's a shorter test. It's just, so it's an easy one to start with. Right? The D I S C stands for dominance influence, steadiness and compliance. The test is linked in the show notes. I'm sure there's different versions.
The one that I will be taking is linked. It's like 1, 2, 3 test.com or something it's linked. If you want to take it with me. One of the things I found when I Googled this is some criticism of the test specifically in like corporate work situations. A lot of these personality tests are utilized by companies to, I don't know, psychoanalyze their fucking employees instead of just giving them like better wages.
I don't know. That's not good into like an anti-capitalist rant right now, but I wanted to read you some of this because I think it's kind of enlightening on the test. I got this from a website called dot com. It's like some. Fucking shit that has a bunch of corporate-y bullshit, but whatever, I thought that the criticism was interesting.
Right? So this is a quote from the website. The DIC assessment is among the most widely used personality tests in the corporate world, but it has been under scrutiny. Critics say that the assessment tool is outdated scientific findings in personality, psychology post 1920. So that's when the test, the test.
Early 20th century, post 1920 are not considered an empirical science-based foundation does not exist. Quality criteria such as validity are values that should be measured, actually being measured and reliability. Our results. The same every time are not fulfilled. The fact that D I S C personality tests seem to make applicable statements can be traced back to the Barnum effect.
According to this, we like to ascribe to desirable widespread or vague statements, although they're applicable to many different. In the last few decades, new assessments and personality psychology have been designed that speak of five key personality types, openness, conscientiousness, extroversion, agreeableness, and neuroticism.
Four personality types alone are no longer regarded as true to our time and quote. That was a lot of jargon. But what I gleaned from that was that a, this test is outdated based on what we know about psychology and. Aside from the fact that like the personalities it's testing for are outdated, the way the test is kind of built is kind of vague.
So it's entirely possible to take it more than once and get different answers. I'm going to take this test now and I will report back on both my personality types that it gives me what I think of the test. And do I agree with this criticism based on my extremely unscientific mind. So let's do quick pause and we'll be right back.
All right. I am done taking the test and I decided to pay for the extended report. For the sake of science. I imagine I'll be doing a lot of that during these episodes, but that's okay because my podcasts are sponsored by my patrons and you should check out www.patreon.com/cindyguentertbaldo to find out more anyway, before I let you know my thoughts on the test in both digging into the test a little bit more and realized that I didn't give you a good kind of explanation of what these things are.
Um, and I have little bit more information cause I have this, uh, bigger report that gives you some more info on what the test actually is. I thought it would fill you in on that and then let you know my thoughts on the test and how I scored. So we talked about the four types, right? Dominant, influence, steadiness and compliance.
Well, they have definitions for those dominance describes the way you deal with problems, assert yourself and control situations. Influence describes the way you deal with people, the way you communicate and relate to others. Steadiness describes your temperament, patience, persistence, and thoughtfulness, and compliance describes how you approach and organize your activity, procedures, and responsibilities.
The D I'm going to read from the report. The DIC theory is often visualized as a quadrant where the top bottom and left right sides represent specific behavioral tendencies. People who score high on dominance and compliance tend to be more task oriented, where people who score higher on influence and steadiness are more people oriented.
Those scoring high on dominance and influence are generally more assertive and active. And higher scores on compliance and steadiness give rise to calm and more cautious, cautious behavioral styles. So what they also say is that the dimensions of the DIC are not dependent on each other. So you could score in one of the areas and it doesn't determine your score.
Like if you score high in one area, it doesn't necessarily negate your score in another area. One of the things that they do. And part of the reason I paid for the results is that your test results. And I saw my results. Give you. Like which one you're the highest in, and it shows how you breathe. They all break the four breakdown, but there are 15 profiles that have been identified as a good coverage of the possible outcomes based on your score overall on each of the things and those 15 outcomes in alphabetical order are the achiever, the coach, the counselor, the creator, the enthusiast, the evaluator, the individualist, the inspiration.
The investigator, the objective thinker, the perfectionist, the persuader, the practitioner, the results oriented and the specialist. Um, I don't know which one I am yet because I haven't scrolled down that far before I do. I'm going to give you my thoughts on the actual test that I took on this website. I found it to be.
Really general. I felt like, and I think this is the same in a lot of personality tests, there were the same questions being, or the same prompts being given. Phrased slightly differently. So the way this test ran was that they gave you a series of, I think 28 different little blocks of prompts, and each one has four prompts and you were supposed to pick the one that was the most like you and the one that was the least like you, and they weren't necessarily related to each other.
They were just four things. And you pick the one that was most like you and the one that was least like you. And there were 28 sections of that. The problem I was running in. Was that there were some where I could hardly choose which one was the most like me. And there were some where I didn't feel like any of them were like me.
And so those were the hardest ones for me to answer. Matter of fact, I didn't answer one. I just put the one that was least like me kept going and it wouldn't let me finish the test. The other real issue I ran into with the test. And again, I'm not a psychologist. I don't know any of that shit, but I'm like, The other thing that kind of irked me was that when you finish the test, it takes you to a page to get some more information on you, to help figure it out.
And the first thing it asks your gender and only offers the binary choices of male and female, which as we all know, gender is a spectrum, not binary, but moving forward. So my DIC score I'm scrolling down. So
in order. I scored the highest on dominance and then the next highest on influence the next highest on steadiness and the lowest on compliance. It doesn't surprise me. Now, when I saw the original results before I bought the report, it actually showed it on a pie chart. And the way the pie chart looked was that a little over half of my answers indicated dominance.
And then of the other half that was left, it was like a sliver of compliance and then pretty much equally distributed between influencing steadiness with a little bit more of influence over steadiness. So the next section on the report says your responses indicate that you want to assert yourself and like to take control, enjoy competition and challenge are self-sufficient and individualistic and all go.
Our goal orient. I tend to be direct and positive with people like to sweep people along with your forcefulness are persuasive, especially when seeking help or commitment, get restless and bored when involved in routine and repetitive work and activities need change and variety in your work. And non-work life may be impatient with people who are less dynamic than.
And that I'm independent and uninhibited feel restrained by rules and restrictions prefer to be measured by short-term rather than long-term results and are willing to take an unconventional approach. I tend to agree with probably about three quarters of that. The things I think, where I feel like this is not at least in my understanding of myself.
The biggest things are that I get restless and bored in routine and repetitive work and activities. That is so not true. I am a creature of habit and when my routines and repetitive things are disturbed, I get really, really grouchy. That was the one I think I, uh, I disagreed with the most on this list. I also, I agree with the direction.
And like sweeping people along, but I don't know how persuasive I am. So that one is a question mark for me, but a lot of this is very much me, so I agree with that. So my profile from that list of what was it, 12 mine is the results oriented. And I'm going to read this to you. You are individualistic, demanding and persistent.
You seek out challenging situations and are responsive to competition. You should be able to handle the daily stresses and pressures of work in life. However, when really pushed, you may become rather irritable and fault-finding people see you as a take charge sort of person who is self-confident and strives for results.
I mean, the part that's cracking me up here is the one really pushed. You may become irritable and fault-finding. Yeah. Yeah, that's accurate. Here are some key words that people often use to describe the results oriented profile, demanding direct egocentric self-assured change oriented, frustrated by lack of progress, persistent, determined, stubborn, independent, and quote own person.
Now I kind of take a little umbrage at egocentric, but at the same time, Isn't that something an egocentric person would say, I don't know. Oh, my prime value for an organization, because this is through a corporate website. Is your driving forcefulness and determination to achieve goals? Uh, tactic and strategy for increased effectiveness says, you appreciate need to.
I need to appreciate that some people may not be as dynamic and forceful as you avoid confrontation by developing your empathy and increasing your tolerance. Impose a little extra self-discipline when faced with details and routine work. And see here is again the point where I feel. This isn't exactly me is that, um, I already do avoid confrontation for the most part, because I really dislike it.
I consider myself to be fairly empathetic and, um, like I said, I really like details and routine work, but now this is interesting most, unlike your profile. The perfectionist, the profile most opposite to your profile is the perfectionist. You will most likely not recognize yourself in these descriptions of the perfectionist conservative, very modest, logical, always systematic, factual, non demonstrative, deliberate, careful, precise.
Accurate predictable and controlled. They're not wrong. I pretty much see myself in zero of those.
Whew, non demonstrative, logical conservative. No. Now here's the interesting part. So I'm looking at the appendix here, which gives you a little bit of a description of all of the different ones. And the one that I'm looking at that I feel like might be a little bit more accurate for me, but again, who fucking knows, right.
Is the persuader, which has some. Some overlap. Right. But the persuader is optimistic, enthusiastic, self-confident persuasive, sociable, change, oriented, independent, persistent, decisive, direct, and demanding. I feel like that is a little bit more, a little bit more, uh, accurate to me. I just took the test and that's, that's what it told me.
So do I, do I think that this test is completely on the nose? No, it's a personality test. Like it's full, it's totally like impacted by my decisions. And there may be a point where maybe I'll come back to this in a year and take it again and see if the same thing happens. But overall, I would suggest that it's not completely off the mark.
I feel like there are a few spots where it feels wildly inaccurate for me, but overall it does feel at least somewhat. Reasonable. I don't know. So I would love to hear from you. About not only what your personality not being pleased, do not pay, do not pay for the 1499 additional PDF. Maybe what you can do is if you really want to just take your score and then give yourself a little.
And the grid would need to be divided into four equal parts D and I on the two top left and right. And then see an S on the bottom left and right. And then kind of just fill in sort of which section has as much as it does. Like whichever one is the most, give it like the biggest and you can kind of see how it fits and maybe just Google it.
I just don't. I spent the money cause I can write it off, but don't spend the money. That's ridiculous. Unless you really want to then spend the money. But I'd love to hear if you take this. Tag me in Instagram stories at @llamaletters. And let me know what you got and tell me that you did it. And if you have any specific personality tests, you'd like me to take in the future.
Let me know in the DMS, this was very odd, but whatever, at least it was a short one. I know that there are some longer ones, I guess. We'll see how that goes. Anyway, don't forget to sign up for the newsletter and check out the Etsy shop, check out the Patreon, do all the things, man, do all the things. But at the very least, if you don't want to do all the things, tag me on Instagram stories that you're listening to this because I'm glad to be back.
And the only real way people know about the podcast is through word of mouth. And that is AOK by me. Thank you so much for watching. I promise to knock it to confrontation and until next time friends, peace out. | |||
| 06 Jun 2022 | 164 | RAGE | 00:11:26 | |
I'm full of rage this week and I figure I'd talk about it. • DISCLAIMER Colorful words may be used. don't be alarmed. • NEWSLETTER • Etsy Shop is open! • FIND ME ON ALL THE THINGS YouTube - https://youtube.com/c/CindyGuentertBaldo Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/llamaletters/ Discord - https://discord.gg/Rwpp7Ww Pinterest - https://www.pinterest.com/llamaletters/ Website - www.cindyguentertbaldo.com • STUFF I MENTIONED Inquiries - cindy@cindyguentertbaldo.com | |||
| 13 Jun 2022 | 165| THE FOUR TENDENCIES | 00:07:00 | |
I read the book The Four Tendencies a while back, but I honestly can't remember what I was. So today, in my latest installment of Personality Tests (taken by a cynic) I'm going for the Gretchen Rubin 4 Tendencies. • DISCLAIMER Colorful words may be used. don't be alarmed. • NEWSLETTER • Etsy Shop is open! • FIND ME ON ALL THE THINGS YouTube - https://youtube.com/c/CindyGuentertBaldo Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/llamaletters/ Discord - https://discord.gg/Rwpp7Ww Pinterest - https://www.pinterest.com/llamaletters/ Website - www.cindyguentertbaldo.com • STUFF I MENTIONED Inquiries - cindy@cindyguentertbaldo.com | |||
| 18 Nov 2019 | Feeling Guilty When You Are Sick | #84 | 00:19:21 | |
How do you deal with feeling guilty when you can’t get everything done due to sickness or some other issue? This was one of your questions - I’ll answer it as best as I can today, although I struggle with it ALL THE TIME.
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| 14 Feb 2022 | THE FIVE LOVE LANGUAGES | 149 | 00:10:38 | |
SHOWNOTESToday, in honor of Valentine's Day, we are continuing the personality test experiment with The Five Love Languages! • DISCLAIMER Colorful words may be used. don't be alarmed. • NEWSLETTER • Etsy Shop is open! • FIND ME ON ALL THE THINGS YouTube - https://youtube.com/c/CindyGuentertBaldo Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/llamaletters/ Discord - https://discord.gg/Rwpp7Ww Pinterest - https://www.pinterest.com/llamaletters/ Website - www.cindyguentertbaldo.com • STUFF I MENTIONED Inquiries - cindy@cindyguentertbaldo.com TRANSCRIPTIONWhat is love, baby don't hurt me. Don't hurt me. No more. If you want to watch A Night at the Roxbury now you're welcome. Welcome to view and curated life podcast. My name is Cindy Guentert-Baldo, and today we are continuing my experiment of trying out various personality tests, uh, from the perspective of somebody like me, who's fairly. When it comes to personality tests, and today by request, I am doing the five love languages because it's Valentine's day when this podcast goes live, it just seemed appropriate. My original plan was to do this with my husband, Jesse. Difficult sometimes to nail down times, or we can both sit down and do this. So today's just going to be me. But if you are interested in me having him on the podcast to talk about his love language and maybe see what we can figure out between the two of us, uh, tag me at @llamaletters in your Instagram stories and. Anyway, let's just get right into it. And if you're interested in the other personality tests, they are in previous episodes, I've probably done five or six at this point. So yeah, it's an ongoing series again, tag me at @llamaletters. If you have any suggestions for other personalities, You would like me to take, so let's get right into it. The five love languages. I probably don't have to explain this to most of you. Most of you probably already know all about this because it is extremely popular. But if you don't know the love languages are a personality test about how you express and receive love. It's meant to. People, uh, effectively communicate their feelings in a relationship. It was originally a book by Dr. Gary Chapman, who is a licensed marriage counselor. He's also an evangelical Christian. And if you're anything like me, then that sounds alarm bells in terms of taking some sort of a personality test from the quote Christian perspective. If you're not Christian, While his books, there's a series of these love language, books, or languages about different ways to be communicate. Uh, there, from that perspective, from everything I understand, I haven't read them, but they do have that perspective. But according to my basic internet search, anyone can benefit from his material. I don't feel like reading the books. So I went to the Google and I came across like the official website of the love languages. And so let's talk about what they are and there's five, which I've said already a bunch of times, uh, first is acts of service, which are for people who actions speak louder than words for them. Right. Somebody doing something for them is their form of love. Next is receiving gifts. Uh, receiving a heartfelt gift is what makes them feel most loved quality time is the next one. And that is forgiving. The other person, undivided attention. Uh, words of affirmation is the love language, where words are the thing that gives you, the people giving you good, like compliments affirming words is the way you receive love best. And then we do this is that. No physical touch. I knew I missed one left for that person. Nothing speaks more deeply than appropriate physical touch. Now I pulled all of these from the website directly in their little blurbs, but they've got videos and all sorts of other stuff where you can dig deeper into it. Again, I don't really want to, I just want to take the test and figure out which one I am. So I'm going to the quizzes page on the website and there's several quizzes. They've got the love language quiz, but then he's also got the apology language quiz, the anger assessment quiz, the appreciation language. A quiz. And again, if you're interested in me doing any of these, either by myself or maybe with my husband, let me know on Instagram about what I'm going to be doing is the love language quiz, which says what's your love language, trademark for couples singles, teens, and children. Take this quiz to discover your primary love language, what it means and how you can use it to better connect with your loved one. It says here, you need to save your results because they won't save them. There is, as of right now, no cost. So I will let you know, after I take it, if there is a price to pay for like the more detailed analysis, which is what I've been paying for a lot of these, for the sake of science in this podcast. But, uh, I don't necessarily think you need to do that. If you're trying to save your money here or whatever, like I'm doing it for science, man. Anyway, I'm going to pause this and take the quiz and we will talk about it in a couple of weeks. That didn't take very long at all. Probably about five minutes. It was a group of probably 20 or 30 paired statements, which is it's more meaningful, more meaningful for me when, and then two different things. So things like my partner says, I appreciate you. Or my partner does something. That's been stressing me out, whatever the case may be. And so I scored fairly highly on two of, well, no one of them, I scored the highest two of them, my score kind of close to each other. And then two were kind of down in the bottom. I'm not surprised by this breakup at all. Uh, acts of service is my, my primary love language because I just, I love when. Jesse does ship for me. I'll be real. Um, I don't think that that was my love language for the longest time. I think the second one on my list, which is if acts of service came in at 23, at 37% words of affirmation and physical touch both came in close to each other at 23 and 20%. If you would asked me what my love language was. Six or seven years ago before my kidneys really started to fail. Or if you had asked me what, I might've thought myself, just in general, what it would have been words of affirmation would have been the, uh, the one that I expected to be the top, because I know that I tend to really shine when I am complimented. When people tell me that they appreciate me, like I am a pleaser. And so. I also can fight back against pleasing. It's very uncomfortable place to be. But the point being is that when somebody lets me know that they're proud of me or whatever, that always really lights me up inside. However, um, as my kidneys have started to fail and I've gotten more and more exhausted. I have found that people doing things for me, because they were thinking of me because they recognize I was tired or stressed out or that I just have a lot on my plate. And then just stepping into do something without me having to ask has very, definitely become like the top of my list. I, I didn't read the books. I don't know if this is more like, what was the other one was the Enneagram. Now, one of the ones that I did recently said that this is kind of how you are from the day you're born. It was the one that has you thinking about what you were like as a kid, uh, I, I, I would imagine that your love language might change depending on your circumstances. If you're a, for example, in chronic pain, a lot of the time, perhaps words of affirmation goes out of the way when it comes to acts of service. It doesn't surprise me. That receiving gifts is on the very bottom. Yeah. Honestly, I've always been very, um, I've always been very touched and excited when somebody has given me something and thoughtful, but generally speaking, um, gifts are just not something that like lights me on fire. I, it's just not my thing. It's not that I don't like getting gifts. I just, I'm kind of ambivalent about it. I don't think about it a lot of the time, which is probably why I'm so shitty at giving gifts as well. Um, Quality time has been lower on my list lately. And it's not that I don't love spending quality time. It's just since the pandemic, we spent so much time together that quality time, sometimes I just want quality time with myself. Do you know what. And physical touch was the one right in the middle at 20%. Very close to words of affirmation. Again, this is one that I think has changed as I have gone deeper into my kidney problems. Uh, Um, somebody who loves hugging, loves touching, holding hands, all of those things. However, the intimacy side now just be totally real with you. The intimacy side of relationships for me has gotten really. Tamped down. And I think it's a combination of the antidepressants I'm on, but also the fact that I am in large amounts of pain all of the time, my kidneys are massive. And so the thought of anything invading my body, any even pleasurable invading force. Sound like the business right now. So I would imagine that that might have pushed physical touchdown, where it might have ranked higher. I would probably have suggested that maybe six or seven years ago the order might've gotten words of affirmation, physical touch, then acts of service. But currently right now, this, this, this tracks with everything I know. And it's actually very interesting to me to think about the differences between what it is now and what it might have been before. My kidneys had progressed as badly as they have. Anyway, interesting conversation. I really do want to do this with Jesse, so I may have a SQL to this coming up soon, but in the meantime, I would love for you to let me know on Instagram at @llamaletters, both what you would like to see from personality tests. And what's your love language? What is it that lights you on fire? I'd love to hear about it. Thanks as always to my patrons for sponsoring this video. With this video, this podcast sponsoring my foggy kidney brain. As much as they do, if you're interested in finding out more, go to www.patreon.com/cindyguentertbaldo. Once again. Thank you. Have a wonderful rest of your day. If you celebrate Valentine's day, I hope it is lovely. If Valentine's day is at bummer and a half for you, I hope that you find something to do today that makes you happy, regardless of whatever the hallmark card and candy companies want us to sell it. I have a good one, stay safe and I will talk to you next week. Bye friends, peace out. | |||
| 16 Dec 2019 | Sharing Custody During The Holidays | #88 | 00:17:18 | |
I’ve been sharing custody for about 10 years now, and the holidays add their own special layers of stress and compromise.
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| 15 Nov 2021 | 136 | Bad Art Friend + Altruistic Kidney Donation | 00:24:50 | |
Have you heard of the Bad Art Friend story? I have so many thoughts, but today unsurprisingly I’m zeroing in on the part that touches me personally… the kidney donation part.
Colorful words may be used. don't be alarmed.
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Original Bad Art Friend Article - https://www.nytimes.com/2021/10/05/magazine/dorland-v-larson.html Plan With Me - https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ewZzIORQKYw Insider Article - https://www.insider.com/bad-art-friend-kidney-donation-nyt-dawn-dorland-sonya-larson-2021-10 Savy's stream (starts when the BAF talk begins) - https://youtu.be/sOsWU7Ampuc?t=8738 Slate - https://slate.com/technology/2021/10/bad-art-friend-kidney-crisis-donation-altruism.html
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TRANSCRIPTIONWell, hello friends, welcome back to the uncurated life podcast, where we talk about all the things having to do with our lives and how we live them on the internet. And today's story today's episode. I talked a little bit about it in a recent plan with me, but I'm going to talk more about it today. I just, you guys like.
This is one of those situations where so many different things cross, and I could spend hours talking about it, but I'm not, I'm going to zero in on probably the most obvious point for me to zero in on. But yet at the same time has been one of the lesser talked about aspects of this entire story. And the story I'm referring to is the bad art friend story.
So if you do not know what it's about, I'm going to give you a very brief overview. I gave a bigger overview in, I plan with me and I will link the original story, which I recommend you read from the New York times, because it's a fascinatingly written story that kind of. Presents things in a way where it sort of serves like a Rorschach test for you based on who you side with.
And of course there's a lot of other articles dissecting it online, but I'm going to give you enough context so that you understand my grievances or my things I want to talk about. But before I get into. What I'm talking about today, I would like to make sure that you are signed up for my newsletter, which I send out on the first Monday of every month.
And then I might send out an alert if something like opens up when the calendars went on sale this week or this last week. But. This month's freebie is a coloring sheet of my fuckery rose, which I think is really adorable. And if you sign up during this month, you'll get it automatically. Everybody who's on the newsletter.
Got it already, but you'll get it this month. But if you're not on the newsletter before the end of November, you're not going to get this. It's only people who are either on it or sign up for it in November. And. I really think it's fucking cute, especially since I'm releasing the new series this month as well.
Anyway, newsletter link, as well as all of the articles that I'll be referencing are all in the show notes. So be sure to check them out. All right. So here is. Here is a bit of the story. And it will say upfront that this story touches on so many different nerves, right? It touches on racism and classism, how we perceive friendship versus the reality of a friendship, plagiarism, writing, etiquette, social hierarchies, the privacy of DMS and text messages.
The story basically. Has all of these elements in it, which makes it so fascinating. And on top of that, it's about writers. And while I have written books, I don't consider myself like a writer writer because my books are not that sort of writing, but from what my writer, friends have said to me, It's not surprising at all that a story like this came out of the writing community, because it is a very insular and kind of gossipy commute can be gossipy.
Not that every writer has gossip and not that all communities are gossipy, but like this particular group of writers and this area of writers in Boston is. Has at least somewhat of a reputation from what I have heard. Anyway, like I said, read the story. It's a fascinating read, but I'm going to go to an insider article that actually has a pretty good recap of it.
Because if I try to go through the actual article, I'm going to like get lost in it. And so here are the basics. It's a feud between two different writers, Dawn Dorland and Sonia Larson. Don darlin altruistically donated a kidney. Now, when you altruistically donate a kidney, it means it's a non-directed donation.
You don't know how it's going to. These are the most rare of donations, and I'm going to go into this a bit later, but suffice to say she donated a kidney to a string. As a living donor and then create a Facebook group to share news and information about her donation. She saw Sonya Larson who she, I guess, interacted at a place called grub street in Boston.
It's like a writers like where you can get educated and shit like that. I'm not entirely certain what the, I couldn't discern what grub street actually was. But Don went to like writing workshops and was familiar and have been to a lot of writing things, but wasn't, hadn't really like published anything yet.
Sonya Larson has published things and his friends, like in a group of friends from this grub street with these other authors and they call themselves the chunky monkeys, which okay. But the, this, this comes to pear to bear. Right. So. Don post. This group invites people to, it tells them this is not made clear in the article, but tells them that they do not have to join or hang out in the group if they don't want to.
She just wants to make sure people who are interested can get information about this and so new joins, but doesn't ever say anything and dog. In one of the first like cringy things in this story messages, Sonia is like, did you know, I donated a kidney because she hadn't responded to any of her messages and they had a bit of an exchange.
And so Don knew now that Sonia was aware of it. Time passes and Dawn finds out that Sonia has written a short story that is getting some attention about a Asian woman who gets a kidney donation from a white woman who is narcissistic and needs attention. And it's very much about a white savior trope.
Is this stuff that with the whole story is about, but that's the character who in previous additions of the story was named Dawn. And the letter that this white woman wrote to the Asian woman was copied from the letter that Don wrote to the final recipient in her kidney chain. Now, when Don found out about this, she sits something to Sonia.
So when you changed some of the wording in the letter, but swore up and down, she wasn't trying, she was just inspired, blah, blah, blah. And it wasn't about Dawn, even though the characters name was Dawn originally. This all turns into a bunch of lawsuits, Sonia files for defamation, Don files back there's like stories get pulled from a big competition and so on and so forth.
And the biggest kind of thing that gets thrown into this is that when Don is in the discovery phase for one of her lawsuits, her lawyers subpoena the DMS and emails of Sonya, and it comes out that there's this group, text of these chunky monkeys, making fun of Dawn for her. Kidney donation and calling her like needy and, and that she's cringy and that they're not friends with her, even though Don assumed she was friends with them.
And there's a lot of like stuff in these DMS to show that indeed Sonya did write the story in part two to rip on Dawn. That, that was part of it. So, and this is ongoing. There is not a resolution for this, but as you can see, there were lots of tweets, examining performative, altruism, bullying, copyright privilege.
People were very divided Celeste, Inc. The author of little fires everywhere. Who's one of the chunky monkeys and was in these group, texts comes on and like goes hard on Twitter to defend Sonya, which sounds freaky. Uh, it just, I don't even know, man, but there's like a lot of people talking about like mean girls and that like, so when you was a mean girl who plagiarized and Dawn was a needy cringy person who doesn't understand social cues.
And I will say that the conversations around this. I have been very much rooted in talking about the donation, the rate, the way that Sonia put racism into the story, the mean girls, the bullying, all of those things. One thing that wasn't really talked about was, um, class Dawn comes from, uh, poverty and Sonja comes from like an upper middle class upbringing.
And. Savvy from savvy writes books who I really enjoy channel. I've talked about her before she had a live stream where she talked about class cues and how, you know, when you don't like some of the things that are considered to be like go shh, or, um, or I don't know, what's the word I'm looking for here?
Like, like that's not how we do things. We don't talk about money this way. We need to humblebrag, not just brag about certain things. That the way that Don was just being earnest about talking about her kidney. Is not classy compared to people who have been from a upper, like an upper class upbringing, which is an actual thing.
I grew up in poverty. I understood exactly what savvy was talking about, even though I'm having trouble articulating it. So go check that out if you're interested in that conversation, because I found it fascinating and I have it linked in the description at the timestamp, because it's quite a bit into the big live stream that she did anyway.
With all of that being said. And like I said, I'm going to keep telling you, like, pause this podcast, go read the article, get a bit of context around it before you come back as a bunch linked in the show notes. But what I wanted to talk about. Was, and this is no surprise to any of you who have been around and know that I have genetic kidney disease and I'm currently cruising into kidney failure and I'm on the transplant list and need a kidney donation.
Right? So you can imagine that. And my sister and I talked about this, she has a transplant from a living donor. And one of the things that really concerned me about the discourse online around this, as well as some of the things that the chunky monkey said, Sonia specifically in the DMS that were published upon the internet, that it really concerned me that it seems like kidney donation became kind of a joke question, mark.
Like, not entirely, but like, like what does she expect us to do? Donate a kidney. I don't know. Maybe you fucking should someone to give you now that I've, contexted the shit out of you with this story. I'm going to, I'm going to give you a more, you know, moment and give you some information about kidney donation.
Not for my own personal sake, but because I want to. Like, whether you think Dawn is cringey, whether you think that she was needy for attention, whatever the case may be. I want you to really understand what she did and the significance of it. So you can maybe give her a little bit more space when it comes to being cringy.
Cause sure. I thought she was cringy too when I read it, but who fucking cares because cringiness is way outweighed by what she did. So here's a little context about kidney donation, the wait list for kidney. For people who need a kidney is usually a brown, a hundred thousand people long at any given time in the United States.
Every day, people die waiting for a transplant and that's from the people who are on the transplant list. This doesn't count people who are on dialysis, who are in kidney failure, who don't qualify for kidney transplant, because maybe they're too sick. Like my great aunt, Ella, who also has PKD and actually got called for a transplant only for them to see at that point, she was just too sick to get the transplant.
And so they took her off the list and she just won't be able to get. She's just too fragile. Right. And then of course, there's that person that like went around the news relatively recently through the university of Colorado, which is where I'm getting on the new transplant list. After moving to Denver who was denied transplant because she refused to get the COVID vaccine and people are like, oh my God, her rights.
It's like, you know, the death camps or whatever. No motherfucker. No, no. If you know anything about transplant, then you know that a, there is a shortage of organs and B it is a very intensive, like surgery requires a lot of manpower. It requires a lot of people and it requires you to be compliant, not just ahead of time before you get the transplant, but for the rest of your life, the life of that organ, you have to be compliant.
If you miss your meds, even once it could go into rejection. And so transplant centers and transplant. Doctors, the teams that manage transplants are extremely cautious about who they put onto a transplant list, because they need to make sure that the organ donation has the highest chance of success.
Because there are so many people in need and there are so many people who will die before they get one because of the shortage of organs. So crony had goddamn river for the woman who didn't get the COVID vaccine and is pissed about knocking her transplant. You have to get every vaccine before you get your transplant because they immunosuppress you.
Like that's part of the fucking. Anybody who was shocked by seeing that story doesn't know enough about transplants, to know that there is nothing out of the ordinary about it. Sorry. That was a rant. Anyway, like I said, there's a shit ton of people who need kidneys. And every day there's more people who need kidneys.
And everyday there are people who die before they get them. There are three types of kidney donation and I'm simplifying this, but there are basically three ways that one might get a kidney in their body. The first and the most common is by, um, a cadaver transplant. So somebody who died. And they're an organ donor and their organs were fit for transplant.
They go to the list and they see the first person on the list who matches the organ. And then they transplant. Now the cadaver organs are the least likely like you, the outcomes are better if you can get a living donor transplant because living donor transplants. I have not had that timeframe in between when somebody dies and when the transplant goes into the body.
So the organ itself has a longer lifespan. Generally speaking, um, like my sister Amy was told with her living donor transplant from her husband that it could last 30 years, at least with my grandma. She got her cadaver transplant when I got pregnant with cat. So 18 years now, and that is considered to be outstanding for a cadaver transplant, like way longer than they potentially thought it would last.
So on top of that with the cadaver transplant, somebody had to die, which it sucks. Right. But like be an organ, even if you're not willing to be a living donor, be an organ donor. If you're able to, because like I said, so many people are writing and this is just kidneys. This doesn't count. At least kidneys, king, kidneys and livers can get living donors, but not everybody can.
So not every kind of like a heart transplant. You can't give someone a heart as a living donor. Right. Anyway, so then there's living donors, people who donate a kidney, cause you can live perfectly fine with one kidney. So you donate your kit, one of your kidneys to your. To usually someone, you know, whether it's a friend, whether it's a family member, whether it's a person, you know, from the internet named Cindy Guentert Baldo, that's joking.
I swear. Maybe not maybe a little bit, not joking, but like there's a saying we have in the kidney transplant in the kidney community of like share your spare. Right. And those that's the majority of living donations or somebody giving a kidney to someone that they know. The smallest amount of donors are the living donors who donate altruistically.
This is also referred to as non directed donation where you are going to donate one of your kidneys, but you don't know who it's going to. You're just donating because you want to donate an organ. That's what Don darlin did. She donated a kidney, which set off a chain of donations where one person got her kidney, that person had a donor who did not match them.
And then that donor chose to donate their kidney to someone else who also had a donor who then did not match them and see what I'm saying. And from what I understand, the letter that Dorland wrote to. The recipient was not actually to the person who got her kidney, but to the person at the end of the chain who got a kidney.
So it's not necessarily like a totally relevant point, but I just thought I would bring that up. So one of the things that massively enraged me about this story, where, where the joke. About how cringey she was. Well, we should just like, should we donate a kidney? And people like giving her shit for talking about it.
Now I would imagine that if you had not heard about this story ahead of time, there was probably a chance you didn't know, you could altruistically donate a kidney because there is, there's so many things surrounding. Kidney donation and living donor donation. Like if you have somebody in your life who is in kidney failure, then you will start to hear about those things.
But it's not something that really crosses the minds of people who aren't impacted by it. And so, yeah, maybe she was cringy. Maybe she was seeking validation for it, but I'll have to say that that is so fucking. This is a quote from a slate article that I will also link in the show notes because it really, I think clarifies how petty and just like fricking awful.
The jokes that these chunky monkeys were making at Dawn's expense really are to me like how much it, it just enrages me that they turned her into a joke. Just listen to this, this quote, what makes the kidney shortage uniquely tragic is that there is technically no shortage of actual kidneys. Most people have two kidneys, but can be perfectly healthy and live a long life with only one.
There are literally millions of spare kidneys in the United States. Given 35 thousand people are added to the waitlist every year, only 0.1, 4% of our country's adult population or one in about every 7,000 people would have to donate a kidney each year to meet the demand. In this light, there is actually a massive kidney surplus and.
So you may ask yourself, okay, well, if there's so many kidneys, like why don't they get more incentives to people to donate blah, blah, blah. Right. There's a lot of complications that come from that. A, there are health implications. It is a surgery. It's a pretty major surgery as a matter of fact. And. While the outcomes are generally really fine.
Like really good. Like my brother-in-law, brother-in-law's doing great with his one kidney. You know, he had to recover from a major surgery, but th his he's doing fine with his one kidney and my sister is doing great with his other kidney. Right. However, he did have to recover from pretty major surgery and go through the pain and the complications of surgery and the potential.
Shittiness that can come with surgery and everything else. On top of that, there's potential financial implications for somebody who is a living donor. Generally speaking, living donors, medical expenses are covered by the recipient. Like if I get somebody to donate to me, their medical expenses will be covered by my insurance.
On top of that, there are. Um, there are organizations that help pay for things like missing work or travel expenses incurred as well as if the donor, if the recipient is able to help cover that with Jesse. And I hope to help cover that for somebody, if they donate for us. However, there is a, there's a very like shaky line.
That is also involved here because where does helping cover costs turn into compensation? And that begins to like dive into like the ethical and moral dilemma surrounding. Adding incentives to people to be living donors, right? Like there have been suggestions. Like if you donate a kidney to somebody, then you should be, you should get like access to Medicare for the rest of your life for free.
Right. If you donate a kidney to somebody and you ever need a kidney, well, and this is true. If you donate a kidney to somebody and you ever need a kidney yourself, you go right to the top of the wait list. But like, they've talked about offering. Incentives to people through the government, but they usually don't go anywhere because there is a.
This ethical dilemma around offering payment for organs, because you can see where that would open a really, really, really dark slippery slope where like people in poverty selling their organs from, have you ever seen repo the genetic opera like that? Right? There is a big, big. Like waiting pool of shittiness that they don't want to go into, which is why you have to both go through psychological testing as a donor to make sure that you are doing it for the right reasons.
And B there cannot be like any compensation going back and forth between donor and recipient because they, it violates ethics on top of that. We can't like force people to give up their organs cause bodily autonomy, my dudes. Right. So. Any program that there might be to encourage living donation is extremely open to exploitation.
And that's really why there isn't anything like that yet. So the biggest way to encourage living donation, the biggest way to both, but people know it's even possibility that altruistic donation as a possibility is to. Talk about it is for living donors. They encourage living donors to talk about it.
They encourage living donors to tell people about it. They encourage living donors to advocate for it, to go in parades, which is something Don did and got made fun of by the chunky monkeys. Like all of these things, these things that are considered cringe or whatever, like no you to humbly brag about it.
No, no, you really don't know. You should tell everybody about it. Don was doing. What living donors are encouraged to do, which is talk about it to hopefully encourage other donors, whether whether altruistic or directed or whatever, like that's the only real way besides kidney patients. Putting their phone numbers on their cars with their blood types is starting Facebook groups to find donors like kidney patients themselves are already looking for kidneys.
Having donors talk about it is the other way to get people interested and potentially considering it. And that's what she did. And they fucking made fun of her for it. So fuck them. That's basically, if you want to know who the bad art friend is, I don't give a shit who the bad art friend is. What I know is that one person.
Donated a kidney and the other one plagiarized her, at least in my read of the situation. And so honestly, all of the rest of the shit doesn't really matter to me. If they had not made jokes about her donating a kidney and how they thought it was, she did it to be needy and blah, blah, blah. They haven't donated a kidney.
Now. I'm not saying you have to, to be a good person. You really don't, it's your body. And it, like I said, it's not an easy or a non-consequential consequential decision to make, but don't fucking make fun of somebody else for that. Think about the person who got that kidney, who could have been one of the people dying on the waiting list.
Like, fuck that shit. Anyway, that's really what I wanted to say. This, all of this talking 20 minutes of talking, just to say, fuck them. I feel gross that I read little fires everywhere. Now, knowing that the author there is fine dragging somebody through the mud, because she has a friend who made fun of somebody who donated a kidney.
Like it bothers me, you guys. And I know I'm feeling a little petty about that, but you can imagine in my position and in the position of anybody. Who is also waiting for a fucking kidney to see an altruistic donor get made fun of, because she's cringy, like, fuck you. Anyway. Now that I've said all of that, do you still want to subscribe to my newsletter?
Because if you do, you'll get the fuckery coloring. At least in the month of November also, you should check out my Patrion because they're the sponsors of this episode. They get to hear these episodes a couple days early, which I don't know, that might matter to you. Maybe that won't matter to you along with other things, they're actually getting a second fuckery flower coloring sheet as a bonus download in November.
Isn't that rad? Anyway, they're my sponsors for this episode. They're amazing. Check about, oh my God. I almost burped. And I'm gonna keep that in on the podcast because why the fuck not I've already. General people I've been the old kidney patients shaking my fist at the clouds kind of a situation today, but yeah, check them all out.
All the links are in the show notes. And until next time my friends be a good art friend and don't make fun of someone for donating a kidney. And until next time, peace out.
| |||
| 24 Feb 2020 | More About My Great Shame | #104 | 00:15:19 | |
Today I'm talking about my recent root canal and how it touched every aspect of my dental shame. For some background, check out episode #99!
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Cindy Guentert-Baldo 4225 Solano Ave. #601 Napa, CA 94558
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| 08 Nov 2021 | 135 | Shit That's Annoying Me | 00:15:37 | |
Sometimes I feel like Oscar the Grouch, and today is no different. Today I’m going on a (lighthearted) rant about some shit that’s annoying me. Lighthearted is the emphasis here my dudes.
Colorful words may be used. don't be alarmed.
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Work Planner Setup - https://youtu.be/4dM7YsxI2jo Maintenance Phase Celery Juice - https://maintenancephase.wixsite.com/home/episodes/episode/4cfde6d6/celery-juice Livestream (puke story) - https://youtu.be/mdCd5fS3iZU
Inquiries - cindy@cindyguentertbaldo.com
TRANSCRIPTIONHello friends. Welcome back to the uncurated life podcast today. I'm glad you're here because I need someone to listen to some shit. That's annoying me. My name is Cindy Guentert-Baldo welcome. If this is your first time here. And do you like what you hear then? I hope you subscribe. We've got new episodes every Monday.
And if this is not your first time here, I hope that you like what you hear and you stick around because that makes me happy quick. And before I get into the episode, I do want to let you know, in case you didn't know already that this week on the 11th, November 11th, 2021 in my Etsy shop, I will be offering a limited run of 2022 calendars, their wall calendars.
They have a mixture of. My fuckery flowers from both series, then old series series one in the new series series two. These will be limited because I can only get so many of them before I lose it. So make sure you head on over there to pick up a calendar or three, they make excellent gifts, blah, blah, blah.
But anyway, I want to make sure to remind you of that because the there'll be dropping on the. If you are on my newsletter, you will get the heads up when they go live. And if you are a patron, your access comes tomorrow, November 10th. So just make sure that if there's something that you're interested in, I don't know how quickly they're going to sell out.
I've never done this before. So you may want to keep your eye on. Anyway, let's get into this because marketing also annoys me. So I've just got a handful of things that annoy me. I told you when I did my like I'm back episode, that I wanted to both handle some spicy topics and some light-hearted topics and talk about things I love and blah, blah, blah.
Well, a combination of lighthearted and spicy is some shit that's annoying me. And I've got a whole list of things that run the. And I just thought I would let you know to see if a they annoy you and B if they don't, you can always yell at me on Instagram at llamaletters, let me know in the stories. So let's just get into it because I love talking about shit that annoys me, apparently that I wonder if there's a personality test that tells you that I don't know.
First of all, is celery juice. I am so tired of seeing on Instagram. I am tired of seeing influencers talk about it. I am tired of seeing it in YouTube videos. I'm tired of it. If you want to have a deep dive on how bunk the whole celery juice thing is now that it's bad for you. It's not, but it's not like it's magical either.
Then listen to the maintenance phase episode on celery juice. They do a great job. I'll leave at link in, the show notes. If you haven't listened to that podcast, a 10 out of 10 recommend. However, my big hatred of celery juice comes from two sort of areas. The first one being like, what the fuck is wrong with just eating celery?
Like I don't even like celery all that much. I like it in soup. I don't really like it on its own. It's too stringy for me, but. There's like a segment of people who think that you have to juice it for it to be good for you, but doesn't that just remove all the fiber? I don't get it. Secondly, a lot of the celery juice, like the people who are enchanted with it kind of use the same language around wellness culture that I find to be really toxic.
And that's going to show up later on this list, but also in some later podcasts, but a lot of it has to do with like the idea of like, Hearing your chronic illnesses and detoxifying yourself. And I'm just going to say that whenever anybody suggests some new trendy thing to cure chronic illness, especially genetic chronic illness, which is what I have, it feels remarkably abelist and it feels really like, uh, I was going to say naive, but I don't think that's the right word.
Just sorta sort of. I don't know, bogus, like fucking no, dude, I have genetic kidney disease, celery juice won't help me. And secondly, anytime somebody tells me they're doing a cleanse or drinking the juice to flux out, flush out the toxins as somebody with failing kidneys. I want to slap them because you know what flushes your toxins, your liver and your kidneys.
So if they're functioning, they're doing it for. You don't need magic juice to do that. And if you're like me and have failing kidneys, Magic juice is not going to flush my toxins. You know what? Well, dialysis, sorry. I did say this was shit that annoys me. So sorry. Celery juice, but I am, I am moving on from you.
Number two, raisins in cookies. Now I know there are some of you who love a good fucking oatmeal raisin cookie, but for me, raisins and cookies are. The most disappointing thing that can ever happen. And the reason that this is like on my mind right now is recently I got surprised the other day thinking I was going to have a delicious oatmeal chocolate chip cookie.
And it was an oatmeal raisin cookie. And I'm sorry, that is not the business. I like raisins. I have nothing against raisins, but not in cookies and raisin bran. Fuck. Yeah, leave my cookies alone. Hashtag. Number three. And this one is actually very, very much relevant to me right now, because I have had to make so many doctor's appointments for both myself and my kid because of my chronic illnesses that have already talked about.
And because my kid has some health problems, we're trying to nail down, hold music. Now I would be fine if a company had like a serious XM station or something, or some kind of. Radio station. I don't know something where the music rotates, but when it's the same song over and over and over and over and over and over again.
And you're on hold for like eleventy million years. It's it makes my brains leak out my ears, like an ice pick to my temple and it's awful. And like, I understand that that's probably less expensive for a company than doing like a radio station, but dear God, dear. Oh. Oh, my God, I just can't. I can't it's it's grading.
Thankfully, at least one of the people that I had to call had the option for you to save your place in line and hang up and they'd call you back. And as much as I hate my phone and ignore it, I tried that and it actually worked. Most of the time I haven't trusted it, but I did try it and it worked. So I may go with that because that might save me from turning into Jack Torrance in Stanley Kubrick's the shining and having all work and no play makes Cindy adult boy, number four, I wrote this out and then the day I wrote this out, it was wrong.
So I'm still gonna tell you it, but. I was kind of shown up by it. And that is that they made the strawberry SAE refreshers at Starbucks seasonal. I have fallen for that with extra water and extra ice because it's too sweet for me. And then they disappeared because it was seasonal, but I don't think it's seasonal now.
I think it might just have been because of supply shortages because they came back. So I don't know. So that may not be accurate. So right now I'm annoyed by the fact that I was wrong.
Next is my seasonal allergies. I thought they would disappear when I removed, when I moved to Denver, because I never had them until I moved to Napa. And Napa is a micro climate and it is known among locals that when you move to Napa, you tend to get allergies, even if you never had them before. And like, everybody I know in Napa would have like the most miserable seasonal allergy situations.
I thought I would be rid of them when I moved, but apparently Napa just like imprinted them on me because I got to Denver and I still have them and it fucking sucks. And I just, I, it annoys me and this is a, should I annoys me? That annoys me podcast. I'm just saying. The fact that my Claritin only takes the edge off.
And the fact that anytime you sneeze or have a runny nose right now in the age of COVID, that everybody looks at you, like you're carrying the plague. And it's like, dude, I have fucking allergies. Like it just it's, it's one of those little things that like, I hated I've always hated, but with COVID it has just gotten more annoying and sure.
It's not as annoying as having COVID, but like, this is annoying shit. This is not catastrophic shit. Right. Speaking of COVID. The next thing that's annoying me is that I bought one of those home COVID tests because one of my kids had some symptoms after somebody at school had gotten exposed and I gave them the test and the test was negative and I was supposed to give them another test in 36 hours.
And I couldn't find it. This annoys me. I still can't find half of the shit in my house because we just moved and I put some stuff away. And now I don't know where anything is. And I know that that will be solved when I start organizing. And now that we live in a bigger house, there's just so many more places for shit to be.
I spent way longer than I needed to looking for the broom the other day, because we have too many closets and I know it's a first world problem, but like it's fucking annoying and referencing that I also can't find my AirPods and I really want them and could use them. I've been doing a lot of things recently where it would have been helpful to have my.
And I don't want to replace them because they're expensive. And on top of that, like I know that the moment I replaced them, they're going to come out with new ones. It's just, I have them there. They work perfectly fine and I just cannot figure out where the fuck they are. And I'm really annoyed by that on a completely unrelated note.
I am very annoyed by my new potassium. So as people who. I have chronic illness or people who take a lot of medications can probably understand. One of the things that can get really annoying is when you've been taking a medication for a long time, and then you change pharmacies or you change healthcare systems, or you change something and the brand manufacturer of your medication.
Especially if you're on generics and so like a different generic company, because there's all sorts of companies that make some of these medications, especially the ones that have lots of generics. I'm not talking about insulin because insulin doesn't have generics. And that's an entire thing that goes beyond annoyance into white, hot rage as this wife of a type one diabetic says, but for me, my potassium.
Has changed. I just, when I made, made the move, we swapped from the Kaiser system to a different healthcare system. And now I'm getting my prescriptions filled at Walgreens and the brand or the generic brand that is making my potassium is different. And for some reason, this new potassium, my gigantic fucking potassium pills that have take three times a day melt in my mouth.
Not in my hand, they start to dissolve the moment they hit my mouth. They kind of crumble when I dropped them into my pill minder, so that there's already little bits of potassium to dissolve into my mouth. And it is bitter and terrible. And I have chronically low potassium, which is really strange for someone in kidney failure.
Like I am, but because of that, I have to take, I have to eat Tassie and rich foods and take hella potassium. And the real thing that makes me sad is that the options that I have. To swap to, instead of this melt in your mouth, not in your hands, potassium are like infusions, which according to my sister, feel like molten lava in your veins or the liquid, which is even gnarlier.
So I'm stuck with it. And it's really goddamn annoying, especially since those pills are so big. I gag on them every time I swallow them and I have to do it three times a day. I am lucky that I haven't barfed on myself. Well, because of that, I have barfed on myself recently. That's an entirely different story.
Number nine is something that has been annoying me for a long time. And I am sort of subjecting myself to it and it still annoys me, but it's my fault because I'm subjecting myself to it. And that is discs for planners. It's helpful to have the disks for my work planner. I can take pages out and write on them.
It's cuter than. Using, um, a three ring binder and I wanted letter sized paper and having like a Filofax type situation for that size. It's harder to find. I love the cover. I love everything about my work planner, but the discs are really pissing me off because even though they're helpful for removing things and whatnot, random shit keeps popping off.
And every time it happens, I curse myself for putting myself in this situation because this is why I don't like this. But I'm gonna keep using them. And so I probably should shut up about it, but this is my podcast. I'm going to do what I want. Right. Number 10, back to the barfing. Nausea is getting worse and worse for me.
It happens when you get further into kidney disease. My sister warned me to keep a extra trashcan with a roll of bags in it, near the toilet for all of those times when it takes you over. And I wish I had known that. After I puked all over myself, I'll make sure to link the plan with me where I tell that story.
If you're really interested in it in the show notes, however, my nausea is getting worse and worse and the Zofran has stopped completely helping and instead just taking the edge off. And I know it's just going to get worse until I get a transplant. I hate being nauseous. You guys, I hate it so much.
Number 11 trader Joe's is discontinuing their curtains from what I was told when I was there the other day. And I just decided I liked them. So I'm bummed. I know this is like the most white girl thing to say about my trader Joe's product. That was discontinued. Trust me. I worked there for 12 years. I had to hear it all, but dammit, this crew Johns are good.
And then finally, the thing that's annoying me the most in the preview. If it's something you're interested in, please let me know in the stories at Lama letters. If you want to make episodes on it, because I'm really thinking about doing it. And that is talking about toxic wellness culture and deprogramming myself from some diet culture.
I have a kid who is dealing with some disordered eating right now, and it is really causing me to take a look at some of the things that I do. And it's annoying the shit out of me. And more than annoying me that I haven't set a better example. But on top of that, I've had some comments over the years, but recently I've had a few more of people being very well intentioned, but completely dismissing my experience as somebody with chronic illness.
And it's just making me more and more annoyed to the point of rage about toxic wellness culture. So if you are interested in hearing a podcast about that, please. Anyway, those are some things that I, that annoy me. I know this is not the most positive episode, but fucks shut. Sometimes shit annoys you. And sometimes you want to get off your chest and sometimes you get surprised by raisins and cookies, and sometimes you puke on yourself and we got to talk about those things.
If you want to share with me something just random, that's been annoying you lately. Let me know in the Instagram stories, just post at llamaletters and tell me about it because I'm curious to see, but the random shit that's annoying. You. Because it's fun for me. Don't forget to check out the Etsy shop on the 11th.
If you're interested in calendars and don't forget to thank my patrons. If you ever see one bop and about because they make these episodes possible. So thank you, patrons, www.patreon.com/cindyguentertbaldo. If you would like to find out more, you know, who doesn't annoy me, you all, and I'm glad that you're here.
So thanks for hanging out next week. I won't be quite as annoyed potential. But until next time, until that next annoying or not annoying time, stay safe because it'll annoy me. If you're not safe and peace out. | |||
| 26 Aug 2019 | What Is Toxic Positivity? | #73 | 00:30:51 | |
I’ve made no secret of the fact that I hate the wave of positivity flooding the internet. Today, I’m talking about toxic positivity, what it is, and how to avoid using it. Thanks to Spellygirlplanning for the suggestion!
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Cindy Guentert-Baldo 4225 Solano Ave. #601 Napa, CA 94558
Inquiries - cindy@cindyguentertbaldo.com | |||
| 14 Oct 2019 | Does Cussing Make Me Not Ladylike? | #79 | 00:12:22 | |
Today’s episode is a quick ramble on one of my favorite subjects - cussing, and how I feel about it both for myself and as a parent.
Finding Planner Peace - https://skl.sh/2MKRtC3 Get two months of Skillshare Premium free! https://www.skillshare.com/r/profile/Cindy-Guentert-Baldo/3618925
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Cindy Guentert-Baldo 4225 Solano Ave. #601 Napa, CA 94558
Inquiries - cindy@cindyguentertbaldo.com | |||
| 16 Sep 2019 | Discussing Toxic Positivity With Others? #76 | 00:21:13 | |
I’m continuing the series on Toxic Positivity with a comment from one of you who asked a really good question - if a speaker or person with a huge following in the community has a message that has a lot of toxic positivity, how do you have discussions about it if you don’t have a following yourself?
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This episode is sponsored by my Patrons. Learn more by checking out my Patron Page!
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Cindy Guentert-Baldo 4225 Solano Ave. #601 Napa, CA 94558
Inquiries - cindy@cindyguentertbaldo.com | |||
| 23 May 2022 | 162 | GOING ON A DATE WITH ME | 00:11:11 | |
Don't tell my husband, but my favorite person to go on a date with is sometimes... me. • DISCLAIMER Colorful words may be used. don't be alarmed. • NEWSLETTER • Etsy Shop is open! • FIND ME ON ALL THE THINGS YouTube - https://youtube.com/c/CindyGuentertBaldo Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/llamaletters/ Discord - https://discord.gg/Rwpp7Ww Pinterest - https://www.pinterest.com/llamaletters/ Website - www.cindyguentertbaldo.com • STUFF I MENTIONED One Little Word - https://aliedwards.com/shop/classes/one-little-word-2022 Denver Botanic Gardens - https://www.botanicgardens.org/ Inquiries - cindy@cindyguentertbaldo.com | |||
| 14 Feb 2020 | I Concede | #102 | 00:03:46 | |
I'm admitting defeat this week.
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Cindy Guentert-Baldo 4225 Solano Ave. #601 Napa, CA 94558
Inquiries - cindy@cindyguentertbaldo.com | |||
| 23 Mar 2020 | Sooo... | #109 | 00:03:06 | |
A quick update during social isolation...
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Cindy Guentert-Baldo 4225 Solano Ave. #601 Napa, CA 94558
Inquiries - cindy@cindyguentertbaldo.com | |||
| 27 Jul 2020 | My Cat Is Sad | #112 | 00:09:15 | |
I expected a lot of things going into this shelter in place pandemic situation, but there has been a LOT I WASN'T expecting...
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Cindy Guentert-Baldo 4225 Solano Ave. #601 Napa, CA 94558
Inquiries - cindy@cindyguentertbaldo.com | |||
| 17 Aug 2020 | It's Back To School & I'm Stressed | #115 | 00:18:14 | |
The title says it all man. Back to school is sending me down a stress spiral this year and I need to get it off of my chest.
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Cindy Guentert-Baldo 4225 Solano Ave. #601 Napa, CA 94558
Inquiries - cindy@cindyguentertbaldo.com | |||
| 14 Dec 2020 | The Holidays Are Hard | #127 | 00:10:57 | |
Today's episode is a recording of a recent YouTube video, talking about how jarring it can be when your feelings about the holidays are not happy, yet the media portrays them as a magical time.
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Cindy Guentert-Baldo 4225 Solano Ave. #601 Napa, CA 94558
Inquiries - cindy@cindyguentertbaldo.com | |||
| 02 Sep 2019 | The First Call In Show! #74 | 00:18:54 | |
Today is my first call-in show; suggested by my Patron Jaime, I’m answering three voicemails left by you! I talk about looking for rejection, how I deal with stress, and more!
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| 11 Apr 2022 | 157 | PATREON VS. THE PLANNER COMMUNITY | 00:20:13 | |
There has been a lot of talk recently about Patreon in the planner community, and as a long time Patreon creator (and consumer) I thought I'd share my thoughts! • DISCLAIMER Colorful words may be used. don't be alarmed. • NEWSLETTER • Etsy Shop is open! • FIND ME ON ALL THE THINGS YouTube - https://youtube.com/c/CindyGuentertBaldo Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/llamaletters/ Discord - https://discord.gg/Rwpp7Ww Pinterest - https://www.pinterest.com/llamaletters/ Website - www.cindyguentertbaldo.com • STUFF I MENTIONED Planners and Wine - https://www.patreon.com/plannersandwine Planner Girl Chatter - https://www.patreon.com/plannergirlchatter Maintenance Phase - https://www.patreon.com/maintenancephase Inquiries - cindy@cindyguentertbaldo.com | |||
| 23 Sep 2019 | Quick Announcement! | 00:00:57 | |
Just a quick announcement today about taking a short break. Don't worry, it's just because I overextended myself. Typical Cindy. | |||
| 04 Apr 2022 | 156 | MY HOUSE CLEANING FEELINGS | 00:15:17 | |
I had my first experience with housecleaners (that didn't involve moving out) recently and I've been grappling with some intensely conflicting feelings ever since. • DISCLAIMER Colorful words may be used. don't be alarmed. • NEWSLETTER • Etsy Shop is open! • FIND ME ON ALL THE THINGS YouTube - https://youtube.com/c/CindyGuentertBaldo Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/llamaletters/ Discord - https://discord.gg/Rwpp7Ww Pinterest - https://www.pinterest.com/llamaletters/ Website - www.cindyguentertbaldo.com • STUFF I MENTIONED Inquiries - cindy@cindyguentertbaldo.com | |||
| 22 Nov 2021 | 137 | What's My Enneagram? | 00:20:13 | |
In part 2 of my Personality Test Adventures I’m heading down the path of the Enneagram, the darling of Christian Instagram.
Colorful words may be used. don't be alarmed.
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DISC Episode - https://uncuratedlife.libsyn.com/133-my-first-personality-test-disc About the enneagram - https://www.enneagraminstitute.com/how-the-enneagram-system-works Test - https://www.enneagraminstitute.com/rheti
Inquiries - cindy@cindyguentertbaldo.com
TRANSCRIPTIONWell, hi there friends. Welcome back to the uncurated life podcast, where I take personality tests and tell you all about them for your amusement. That's not the only thing we do here, but that is a series that I started relatively recently. So this is the second episode. The first episode was the D I S C assessment.
And I will link that in the show notes, if you would like to check it out and you haven't already, that was episode 1 33, but today we are going to be taking a look at the Darlene of Christian Instagram, the Enneagram test. Now here's the thing with personality tests. I'm generally skeptical about them, but enough people asked me to take them.
That I decided to just do this for the amusement of the internet. So I promise I go into these tests with an open mind and I am not being snarky when I answered the questions and actually take the test. Even if I'm snarky. When I talk about the test, when I take it, I'm taking it seriously. You may not believe me, but I swear I am now before we get into the actual test, give me a moment to mention that my latest series series two of my fuckery flowers, which are my flagship art print.
They're a beautiful flowers in botanicals. Mixed media paintings that I create prints out of, and they're realistic, but hidden within them as a naughty word. Fucking love them. I have a new series of 12 launching this coming Thursday, the 25th, the link is in the show notes and the shop is only going to be open until December 10th and then I'm going to shut it down for the holidays.
So. Shipping does not bite us in the ass. So just be sure to check it out when you're able, there will be some bundles that will be limited edition showing up just for black Friday weekend, blah, blah, blah. Check it out. Let's get to the test. So what is the Enneagram? So from the website, Truity they say.
The Enneagram is a system of personality typing that describes patterns in how people interpret the world and manage their emotions. The Enneagram describes nine personality types and maps. Each of these out on a nine pointed diagram, which helps to illustrate how. Relate to one another. The Enneagram is mostly used for personal self knowledge and personality development, offering a powerful tool for better understanding your core motivations and applying that knowledge to all areas of your life, including conflict resolution, team dynamics, leadership, and emotional intelligence, because it identifies opportunities for development for each individual type.
It has become widely used in. Such as counseling psychotherapy, business development, parenting, and education and quote. So like the quote said there are nine types and I pulled these from the Enneagram institute.com note that they're highlights. They're not the full spectrum of each type. Just to give you an idea of each type.
So type one is. A is principled purposeful, self controlled and a perfectionist type two is generous. Demonstrative people-pleasing and possessive type three is adaptable, excelling, driven, an image conscious type fours, expressive, dramatic self-absorbed and temperamental type five is perceptive innovative, secretive, and isolated.
Type six is engaging responsible, anxious, and suspicious type seven is spontaneous, versatile acquisitive and scattered type eight is self-confident decisive, willful and confrontational type nine is receptive, reassuring, complacent, and resigned. So it's nine types. It's a whole bunch of information. If you want to read more, like I said, links will all be in the show notes.
Now I said at the beginning, the Darlene of Christian Instagram now, well, the Enneagram is not rooted in Christianity in recent years. It has really taken root in a lot of the communities. The first time I attempted to take this test a couple of years ago, the free test I found was explicitly Christian.
And I note right the fuck out of there because I'm not Christian. And. A ton of the books I've found on different Enneagram types are written from a Christian perspective, like devotionals for type threes or how to be a type three. And then they don't say that they're Christian, but then you look at them and they're pretty fucking Christian.
It's not my jam dude. And so I'm not like in. The test I did find is science-based allegedly, what does it say? Science-based or scientifically validated force choice, personality test. Uh, it didn't seem to be Christian. When I looked at it, it costs $12. And according to the website takes about 40 minutes to complete.
Now there are plenty of free tests out there. You just need to be careful if you're not somebody who wants to take one from a Christian perspective to just keep an eye out for that. And on top of that, a lot of them will give you information, but you gotta like give them your email to get the rest of it and blah, blah, blah.
So just that, that's the point. The one I am taking is the. Test the Riso Hudson Enneagram type indicator routine version 2.5. And that is linked in the description. So. It says here that it has been independently scientifically validated rather than just indicating your basic type. It produces a full personality profile across all nine types, providing you a unique portrait relative indicating your relative strengths and weaknesses of the nine types within your overall personnel.
All right. So that's the one I'm taking. I will pause you here and go take it. If you want to take one of the tests and do it with me, then post, we can post about it on Instagram stories, blah, blah, blah. But I'll be back. I'll be back. All right. So I am done with the test. It went pretty quickly for me. I wound up doing it about 20, 25 minutes, but I tend to read really quickly and I didn't hesitate.
There were a couple where I think I read the question wrong. So I went back and was right about that and then answered it. So according to my results, my highest Enneagram type is two with seven being very close second. And then my lowest was type eight. So. I looked at this and two is the helper.
Generally twos are caring, empathetic, warm, thoughtful, appreciative, generous, other oriented, tactile affectionate, well, intention and demonstrative. They get into conflict by being people pleasing, flattering, ingratiating, clingy, worried, possessive insincere, seductive self-important, and self deceptive. And at their best twos are encouraging, loving self nurturing.
Constant joyous, humble, forgiving, gracious, and compassionate. So I see aspects of myself in this one, but I think that the second one, which is very close to the first. Is a little bit more me because I, one of the things I read about the Enneagram is that your original personality type is the way you like.
It's something that's constant throughout your life. And I feel like a lot of the aspects of the two are things that I have developed through like working on myself, but seven, the enthusiastic, I read that one and I was like, Hmm. So sevens are excitable spontaneous, curious, optimistic, eager, outgoing, future oriented, adventurous variety, seeking quick and talkative.
They get into conflicts by being scattered, distracted, restless, impatient thrill-seeking escapist, overextended, irresponsible, demanding, and excessive. And at their best, they are appreciative bountiful, thoughtful, accomplished, versatile, receptive, grateful content, quiet and passionate. Type seven exemplifies the desire for freedom and variety and for exploring the many rich experiences that life offers they're spontaneous and upbeat.
They find life exhilarating that the kind of people who and see like this also in some ways like there's aspects of this that are very much me, but there are aspects that I'm not adventurous. And I don't feel my social calendar like.
So there is that. Now one of the things I wanted to look at to see if maybe I could figure out which one of these I was, and I could see the, now I'm going to the third one, which was five, generally fives are focused, observant, curious, insightful expert studious. Complex perceptive, whimsical, profound unsentimental ex no, this isn't me as much either.
I don't know you guys. I need to sit down and talk to Jesse about this and be like, which one it ma, but I feel like, Ooh, sorry about the odd by goodness, but I feel like seven. So I'm going to go to the personality dynamics and variations to see if I can kind of. Kinda hammer this out under stress. Seven goes to average one sevens value their spontaneity and tend to follow their impulses for better or for worse.
As a result, they can become scattered in their attention and energy leaping from one idea to the next, from one activity to another. While this can be exciting. It often leaves seven's frustrated with themselves because they feel like they are not accomplishing as much as they would like to. At such times they begin to behave like average ones pulling in the reins on themselves and trying to get more organized and self controlled.
But because they are trying to impose order and control on themselves, they begin to feel trapped and restricted. This just makes them more frustrated, impatient, and irritable. They may, for instance, become critical of their own creativity. Creative. Before they have had a chance to develop them. Similarly, they cannot avoid feeling disappointment with people and aspects of their environment.
Nothing meets their expectations and they can become harsh and perfectionistic be critical with themselves. And with others, see that that is fucking like razor sharp. Security seven goes to an average five sevens often feel it is their duty to entertain others and keep their environment positive and exciting over time.
This can be exhausting even for sevens, when they are tired of being on for everyone, they may choose to withdraw even from their intimates and seek seclusion. And noninterference, this can come as a shock to others. You've been out having fun with everyone else. Why are you so quiet and unavailable? They no longer want to put out energy for anyone else and can become almost obsessively focused and preoccupied.
They can also be surprisingly withdrawn and isolated, like fives, their body language and aloof responses. Let others know they want space and privacy. They make no effort to entertain or energize others like fives. They retreat from contact and attempt to restore their energy. Again. This is very much me, the only real exception being this, being a shock to others.
But I think it's because my family and my friends know me well enough to know that there are times where I am just like fucking no. Integration seven goes to healthy five, a sevens learned to relax and tolerate their uncomfortable feelings. More completely. They stop using their restless minds to distract themselves.
Their minds become quiet, clear, and focused, allowing sevens to tap more deeply into their reserves of creativity and insight. They're able to prioritize not by imposing some arbitrary order on themselves, but by following their true interests and staying with them, thus, they become far more productive, satisfied.
Satisfying as companions, their capacity to find connections and to synthesize information is not drawn off into tangents. They produce results and this gives them grounds for real confidence in themselves and in life. As they experienced the world more deeply, they find each moment fascinating, profound and regulatory.
The idea of boredom becomes absurd as they savor the incredible mysteries of existence. See like, This I can totally get. And I, this is making me think I'm the seven, cause I'm going to look at the same things for two and I'm not going to read them completely
like the resentment for two under stress. They, um, can't maintain their loving attitude and. They turn into like an egocentric controlling. I can be egocentric and dominating, but I don't turn into like an egocentric Dick. When I feel like my shit has been rejected. I tend to withdraw when my shit has been rejected.
So I, this is I'm the opposite of this. I tend, I don't, they, what they're saying is that under stress twos tend to outburst aggressive, blah, blah, blah. And I tend to pull into myself with the security one. It says they may risk expressing their neediness and darker impulses. Again, that's not really me and the integration.
Yeah. See, I think just looking at all of these things about the two, it also says. It's very possessive and like people pleasing. And that's not me. I'm not really sure how I got to that. But with seven, the relationship issues. So some relationship problems can include these becoming so involved with expressing their thoughts and ideas that they do not really listen to others.
That would be me becoming impatient or critical of other slower pace. Just ask Jesse getting flighty or to seeking distractions. When important relationship challenges arise, fearing that others will not support them. If they're down or depressed, expecting the partner to provide gratification, entertainment, or support immediately on demand and being unwilling or very slow to make commitments.
A lot of this very much resonates with me. And one of the things I will say that with some of those things, they have been problems for me in the past and having a really healthy relationship has helped mitigate some of those things. So I actually think that the seven might be the closest one to me, although the biggest part of seven, that is not me as I am not adventurous, like at all.
So the other thing that usually happens with an Enneagram test is you might be able to know what your wing is. So it's the number that is the closest to your number on either side that you score the highest in. And for me, it would be six according to this. So let's take a look at that. Generally sixes are reliable, hardworking, organizing vigilant, dutiful, evaluating, persevering, cautious, anxious, believing, and doubting, conservative, and liberal six is get into conflicts by being pessimistic, defensive, evasive, negative worrying, doubtful negativistic, reactive, suspicious, and blaming, and at their best they're courageous cooperative disciplined, grounded, secure, faithful.
Self-expressive funny and affectionate. And the relationship issues for a six are getting testing the other person to see if he or she is going to stay getting over committed, causing sixes, to feel pressured and taking advantage of clamming up and not expressing their feelings or venting. The stream of anxiety is alternating between feeling dependent and needy and feeling divided to find a rebellious like rain, hot or cold becoming suspicious.
Doubting the Goodwill of others towards them and blaming people for their own anxieties. And there's a lot here. I can resonate as well. Although not as much as with a seven. Um, the other thing that I can see here is that here, for example, security, when six is feel secure, they begin to deal with stress by simply shutting down and becoming indifferent to their surroundings.
So like there are aspects of this. So if I was going to take a, like, read this and interpret it, I would say that I'm a seven wings, six. So an enthusiast wing loyalist, um, I would imagine that it's a six for my wing, not an eight, because eight was the lowest on my score. What do I think about this? I mean, honestly, most of what I'm looking at here is stuff that, like I already knew about myself and the suggestions for like levels of development and everything like healthy levels.
So like where is it at number seven? One of the things they say is at a healthy place at your best, I would assimilate experiences in depth, making them grateful and appreciative for what they have becoming odd by the simple wonders of life, joyful and ecstatic. Intimidations of spiritual reality of the boundless goodness of life.
I don't think I'm there. I think actually level three. So the lowest healthy level before you hit. Um, average levels is become accomplished. Achievers, generalists who do many things well, practical, productive, usually prolific cross fertilizing areas of interests. I think that that's kind of where I'm at with this, but I'm not sure, you know, and I mean, this, I don't know how much this is all a thing, but I appreciate the look of this.
It, the only thing in here that feels slightly. Christian. Like it doesn't feel Christian at all, except there is Nope. That's about it. I was going to say that like, one of their things is like, they talk about like, your passion is gluttony or plat. Passion is avarice, but they're not all the seven deadly sins, so, okay.
They're just using that verbiage, but yeah. Um, so I'm going to come out of this St. I'm a seven wing six and Ooh. They also have examples of who, who are sevens and who are whatever. If I'm looking at who sevens are some sevens pulling out of here, we got Joe Biden, but we also got Sarah Pailin. We got Katy Perry and Brittany Spears and Goldie Hawn and cameras.
There's a lot of actors on here. There's a lot of actors on here. Elton John is on here. Leonard Bernstein is on here. Who else? JFK is on your Mozart. Thomas Jefferson, Benjamin Franklin. I mean, he had gout to I Kandinsky and artist. I really admire is on here. Jim Carey, David do Cavani. There's a bunch of actors and so on.
And so this makes sense, like a lot of like people in like the arts seem to be on here. So that's, that's cool. Anyway, I don't know you guys, I don't know if this is garbage or if this is realistic, but I will say that it's an interesting way of looking at things, looking at things like how you resolve conflict and how you go about your life in that way.
So I do appreciate that. And I wonder if once I'm done with all of these personality tests, if I set them next to each other and see, do they kind of inter in line with each other or was I just in different moods those days? Cause sometimes I wonder when I'm taking these tests, um, is it just based on my mood that day?
Like today, am I seven and tomorrow mine eight, like who fucking knows. Right. Anyway, if you take the Enneagram, let me know, let me know what you are. Tag me on Instagram at Lama letters. And don't forget to check out my shop. All the information is in the show notes, as well as links to all of this shit.
The fuckery flowers are releasing later this week. I am so grateful that you're here and I am so grateful to my patrons. They are the sponsors of every episode of the podcast. And if you are interested in becoming a patron and getting early access to these episodes, then you can check it out. There is links in the show notes.
There's all sorts of shit in the show notes. So it's even a transcription of this. But if you're listening to this, you may not want the trans I don't fucking know. Anyway, thank you so much. I'll see you next week. And until next time friends, peace out.
| |||
| 02 May 2022 | AN INTERLUDE | 00:10:46 | |
I'm behind this week and feeling really rundown - so instead of the episode I had planned here is a brief interlude mentioning a few things that are perking me up today. • DISCLAIMER Colorful words may be used. don't be alarmed. • NEWSLETTER • Etsy Shop is open! • FIND ME ON ALL THE THINGS YouTube - https://youtube.com/c/CindyGuentertBaldo Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/llamaletters/ Discord - https://discord.gg/Rwpp7Ww Pinterest - https://www.pinterest.com/llamaletters/ Website - www.cindyguentertbaldo.com • STUFF I MENTIONED Highlighter Dot Pens (Mild Smoky Not Currently available at this link - affiliate link) - https://amzn.to/38AMYpu Elvis Trailer - https://youtu.be/wBDLRvjHVOY https://youtu.be/wBDLRvjHVOY Spring Awakening Trailer - https://youtu.be/f59eioQGL-c Book - https://amzn.to/3khibAH Inquiries - cindy@cindyguentertbaldo.com | |||
| 02 Mar 2020 | A Little Sprinkle of Joy? | #106 | 00:23:26 | |
Today I'm pondering the small things in life that make my day a little brighter, even when the rest of it feels like a dumpster fire.
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| 21 Feb 2020 | When Someone Tells You Who They Are... | #103 | 00:06:00 | |
Believe them.
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Cindy Guentert-Baldo 4225 Solano Ave. #601 Napa, CA 94558
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| 28 Feb 2020 | Wanting What Other People Have | #105 | 00:04:58 | |
Why is it so hard to be satisfied with what we have?
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Inquiries - cindy@cindyguentertbaldo.com | |||
| 13 Dec 2021 | 140 | Shit I'm Looking Forward To In 2022 | 00:24:12 | |
It’s been another long, tiring year for me with lots of changes and challenges. In order to really pump myself up, I decided to take some time to really think about what I’m looking forward to in the next year.
Colorful words may be used. don't be alarmed.
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Previous Episode - https://uncuratedlife.libsyn.com/131-shit-im-excited-about-fall-21 Vlogmas Giveaway Schedule - https://cindyguentertbaldo.com/?p=7177
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TRANSCRIPTIONWell, hello friends, welcome back to the uncurated life podcast. I thought that as we are cruising into December of 2022, that it would be a good time to really think about some things I'm looking forward to in the new year. I already did an episode like this a few months ago, and there may be some repeat things, partly because some of them haven't happened yet.
Well, mostly because some of them haven't happened yet, but I will link it in the comments. If you haven't heard. Yet. So this is going to be fairly lighthearted, but I do want to just kind of think about some of the things I'm looking forward to in the next year. Some where I have some high expectations and somewhere I have some low expectations, mostly because I think that it helps keep me feeling.
At least somewhat hopeful, even when I am in the middle of some pretty intense stuff, family and personal wise right now. So it's, this is an exercise for me to kind of keep my head, right. I'm not into the whole manifesting shit. I'm not into all of that. But what I do really like to think about is. Just reminding myself that there is stuff that I can be hopeful about, even when a lot of other shit in my life feels pretty rough at the moment.
Before I jump into these things, though, my name is Cindy Guentert Baldo. If this is your first time here, I'm glad you're here. And if this is not your first time here, thanks for coming back. And I did. To remind you that if you are not following me on Instagram at Lama letters or over on my YouTube channel and all these things are linked below, I have started my Vlogmas giveaways, where I am trying to get a shit ton of planners.
I've been reviewing out of my house and I will be rotating between Instagram and the YouTube community tab, running these on Tuesdays, Thursdays, and Sundays for a 24 hours. Each it's open internationally. All of those good things. The schedule will also be linked. So if that's something that you're into, if you want a free planner go and check them out, let's get into the things that I am looking forward to in 2022.
And first of all, because this is me, we're talking about, we have to talk about media and I guess one of the things I want to say before I jumped into it, cause I'm pretty sure I've mentioned at least one of these things in the previous episode, but one of the things, or two of the things I think. Maybe three of the things I mentioned in the last things I'm looking forward to, I have seen already, and I was extremely happy with all of them.
If you're interested in like actual reviews of things, let me know, tell me on Instagram, tag me in your stories, because I don't know if that's something you want from me, but at the very least I'll give you a high level. Look at those three. And that was Halloween kills, which I know some people. Like it was polarizing.
I enjoyed it. I felt like it was a solid entry. I I'm a big fan of the Halloween series. I enjoyed the Easter eggs and I enjoyed the brutality of it because apparently that's what I like in horror movies. I liked it. I can see the complaints people have with. Dune was outstanding. And I am so glad that they were able to Greenlight the second one, because that would have sucked so many balls socks, if they did not Greenlight that.
And currently we are in the middle of the wheel of time series. And again, for some book fans, it's a little polarizing because they've had to make changes, but I am of the opinion that it's an adaptation. They have to change things to make it translate for the show. And every episode for me is consecutively getting better and better.
And the casting is outstanding and the show is beautiful and I am loving it and I am just excited to keep watching it. And the thing I love the most is that my kids are super into it with me. It's something I have loved since I was their age. And so being able to watch it with them is amazing. And even Jesse is on board for it.
Good times, but those were the things that I was looking forward to media wise, the things I am looking forward to next year. And I think I've said, I've already mentioned some of them TV shows, uh, discovery of witches, which is coming out in January. It's the final season. They've done three seasons to adapt the three books.
And I have really enjoyed it. Several of you were the ones who got me into the books this last year to begin with. And then I went and I bought the shows on Amazon because I don't have the cable where I could stream it. I'm ready to watch the new season. I'm still here for it. You guys, so here for it, Matthew Good is a hot hot man.
And I just really enjoy the way they've been adapting it. And I'm excited to see how they bring it to a close. The other thing I'm looking forward to is how some of the dragon. Now I know some people are like you, but the last season of game of Thrones, well, Aside from the fact that, um, unlike game of Thrones, how so the dragon story is done, you can pick it up yourself.
It's the first volume of fire and blood. And I honestly would rather he finish the second volume of fire and blood that finished the series at this point, if he was only going to finish one thing, cause I loved it as somebody who likes reading history, like I'm nerd like that house of the dragon, which is basically a history book of the reign of the target.
Good times. And I am looking forward to the show. I think the casting so far has been outstanding. They're going to be having like 17 different dragons in the show. They all have different personalities. I'm looking forward to it and I've heard rumor, nothing confirmed that it will probably come out sometime in like April to June of 2022.
And I'm here for it. Not going to lie. Movie wise, uh, some of these, it should be no surprise to you. For example, Halloween ends the final of this trilogy that they're doing with Jamie Lee, Curtis and Daniel Gordon green, and all them looking forward to that, uh, screamed five is supposed to be coming out in January.
Okay. I remember hearing that like the original three from the first group of movies, you know, Courtney Cox and, uh, David Arquette and nev Campbell, weren't going to come back because west Craven has gone without there being a really good reason. And apparently the people who are making it are like huge fans of the original movies.
They really want to honor west Craven by making it there's a great cast, including what's his face from the boys. Uh, the one who plays huge. He's supposed to be in it. There's it just, I have enjoyed all of the screen movies to varying degrees. I was again, 16 when the first one came out. So it's very much in my wheelhouse of like self reverence, referential, horror film.
So I'm down to see it in the theater. Probably not, not with the new variant, but I will stream it wherever streaming is available. Assuming I have it. Uh, then there is on the horror movie list also. Which is Jordan peals. New movie has Daniel Kalua in it. And Steven Yuen from the walking dead. And, oh, I don't remember who else, but it has a great cast already.
There isn't a lot out there about it yet, but I thought that both us and, um, get out were outstanding, outstanding horror films. And I am I'm, I'm perfectly willing and ready and able, and my body is ready to watch any horror movie. Jordan Peele decides to be. And then on a non horror note, the SQL to enchanted is supposed to be coming out this next year disenchanted and it has the cast back and I loved and chanted.
It was the first movie cat saw in the theater. And I, I loved that. They were able to send up the princess movie tropes. While still being a good PR like, like scream, scream was excellent at both lampooning horror films while also being a really good horror film in chanted did a great job at lampooning Disney princess movies will also be in a really good Disney princess movie.
So. I would love to see that. And then, uh, the new Batman movie with team Edward, Robert Pattinson in it, I am very interested in it. I love Batman movies. I really enjoy them on all sorts of levels. Even George Clooney, nipple suit, even Ben Affleck actually thought Ben Affleck was not terrible. I thought he was very good, like older dark Knight returns, kind of comic book.
If you've read the dark Knight returns comic series. Frank Miller. I think he embodied that older world, weary Batman, and I'm excited to see Robert Pattinson's Batman, which is supposed to be sort of in between the origins of Batman, like Batman begins. And then the later Batman of like the dark Knight rises, it's supposed to be like Batman in his first year of Batman and where he still hasn't quite figured it out yet.
I think it's interesting. I would love to see it and yeah. Um, I'm team Edward for Batman. That's all I'm going to say about that. And I'm not actually a big fan of the Twilight series. I just like saying that I probably shouldn't have even had to tell you that anyway, now that we've talked sort of about some of the media, I'm looking forward to.
I said in my last thing, I'm looking forward to that. I'm looking forward for snow. I'm still looking forward to it. It hasn't really snowed here yet. It's actually 70 degrees today. It did have the, we did have a couple of flurries right around Thanksgiving at night, and that was exciting, but not enough to stick.
So I am still really looking forward to snowy season. I know you all are going to be saying like, yeah, you won't look forward to when you have to drive. Uh, it hasn't happened yet. So give me my illusions, delusions, whatever you want to call it for at least a little while longer. Another thing I'm looking forward to in 2022 is exploring more of the Denver slash Colorado area.
We haven't really had the opportunity to do much of that in large part, because since we've gotten here both Jesse and I have been really swamped with work. And then on top of that, there have been health issues for various members of our family, including myself that have needed to be addressed. So the most exploring I've done is shopping and.
Doctor's offices. So being able to explore more of it, we really want to go to red rocks amphitheater, whether it's, I don't know if we want to go see music yet, because again, the variants that are coming out, that that's not, it's not something I want to bring into my life, but I've heard the sunrise.
There is gorgeous. There's a lot of things we'd like to do. We just haven't had the chance yet. And I would really like to prioritize that in the next year, which will be something that will likely happen when I start setting goals for the new. On top of that, I would really like to see how Lucy and Layla's relationship is developing.
I've mentioned it, I think a couple of times in the podcast, but maybe I have, maybe I have it. I don't remember. We adopted a puppy, Layla. She is a black lab mix. We think she's mixed with a little bit of pit bull. We got her from the Colorado retriever rescue. So she's a rescue puppy and we have let her and our cat Lucy really.
Take their time getting to know each other with an emphasis on Lucy, driving how much they are actually experiencing each other, because Layla is totally good with cats because the foster home, she was in. Had a ton of dogs and one cat and the cat was the alpha. And she quickly learned that the cat is the boss.
She really wants to be Lucy's friend when he's not in the mood to play with her, she will whine, but she won't bother him. And just last night, I got to watch them playing with each. They were chasing each other up and down the stairs. It was really cute. So I'm excited to see how their relationship develops both because it, it it's good for both of them.
I think Lou has been a little lonely since Loki died, so it's, it's just something I'm excited to watch because it's been really cute so far. Another thing I'm looking forward to art-wise is trying larger scale art projects. This is actually something that has been on my mind for a while. And I am now at the point where I would really like to start exploring that that may be something that I hope to either get some for some Christmas money or I don't know what, but maybe an easel, maybe try doing some acrylics.
I don't know if I want to watercolor on a larger scale, but I'm really interested in doing a quick acrylics on a larger scale. That's just something I'm super interested in and it's not something I would necessarily be doing for like my art prints or anything like that. At the moment, it would be for me in my own enrichment and, and practicing of new skills, which is very important.
If you are any sort of creative, it is always important to be forever learning because there is always something more to learn and you, that anything you learn in different arenas can often be applied to different areas of your creative practice. It's important to me to try some new things. The idea now that especially that I have room where I could leave an easel set up on the regular, I really would like to get started on trying some larger format pieces of art.
That's that's high on my list. Now I will say that while this is not meant to be like what I'm looking forward to work-wise for the next year. I, there is at least a little bit of work coming into this and that. Trying out different things, lines of products. So for my product based side of my business of my work, like I do all sorts of different work.
I make content, I freelance, I have a community on Patrion and I also have an Etsy shop that I sell. Prince of my original artwork. And one thing I did this holiday season was introduced some new products. I sold some vinyl sticker decals. I sold some bookmarks and I sold some calendars and that was really fun.
And so not only am I interested in experimenting with different kinds of art for my own enrichment, I'm also interested in releasing just some different things, whether it is a full. Well fuller, I don't know how you would say it, but like a line of bookmarks with more of my fuckery flowers on them, as I've gotten requests that people can collect them to maybe putting some of my pattern work and other things that I've been doing as well, kind of to, again, continue to hone my skills maybe on fabric or a wallpaper, or on like going through like a print on demand site, like Spoonflower or.
Society six or whatever to sell, like mugs or pillows or whatever. I don't know. I'm just, I'm curious about like testing things because it's, it's fun to see my stuff. And I've always had a lot of fun when Kristin has sent me from Christiana designs, like a mug or whatever, like things outside of stickers that she's put my art on.
The art I do for her is one style of art and the art I'm working on for my. Different. And so it just, it's something that I'm interested in maybe experimenting with. I think I've come to the conclusion. I won't release new fuckery flowers except for the holidays. So like once a year, because they do take quite a bit of time to actually paint.
It's a series of 12 and each painting is hours of work, but I don't know. It's just something I'm looking forward to next year is maybe trying some experimentation with that. That's on my list. Again, of things I'm looking for. Now house wise, a lot of, you know, we moved to Denver this past year and I actually will be doing a podcast kind of thinking about the last year and everything else, as well as the videos that'll be coming out on my YouTube channel.
Rob, talk a little bit more about the move and everything else, but one of the things I'm looking forward to this next year is really settling. Like we already have settled in. And one of the things our family commented on when they were here this last month was how it already feels lived in here. But there's a lot of things below the surface that really could use some love.
Like I thought I would get more organizing done in the closets and I just have not had the time and I have so many. That just, I could do an entire YouTube series just on organizing all of the closets in this house and have a good amount of content. I would like to really get shit organized in the closets.
I would really like to get some art on the walls, which is something I'm already working on right now for the main level of the house. But like, Getting some of the smaller details taken care of in this next year, while we're both exploring and really trying to live into this house because we love this house.
That's something that I really am looking forward to. It's like a nesting kind of instinct that I am feeling pretty hard right now. Hard. Also speaking of the house, taking on some home projects. Now I am not talking about large home projects. One of the things I did appreciate when we bought this house is that it's not a project house.
The previous owners put a lot of work into it, which we really appreciate. And one of my requirements, when it came to buying the new house here was. Not getting a project house because our house in Napa was a project house. It was a hoarder house. We had to put a new kitchen into it, new bathroom into it.
And we did most of that work ourselves. It was a lot of work and a pain in the ass, but there are little things that have been on my list since we bought the place. And there are things I'd like to like put some time into, especially as another big focus for me this next year is going to be setting boundaries around my work and personal time so that I have space and time to do some of these personal projects instead of always.
Into work. One that comes to mind specifically is the cabinets in my laundry room. They are still the original cabinets from the house and the cabinets are in great shape, but the doors I would like to update them either put new doors or maybe paint them. I'm not sure, but I would like to update the laundry room cabinets and there's several of them.
And I know that would be probably a project in and of itself. That's something I'm actually looking forward to doing. Cause I think I could, it's a small enough scale where I don't need to get like a contractor to do it and I could probably figure most of it out on my own, but it's large enough where the impact for me, especially since I spent so much time in there, it would, it would be.
Another thing I'm really looking forward to is, um, like I said, the closet organization, uh, RJ really would like his room painted. And while we might do that professionally, I like to get that done for him. Cat has actually discovered they love the murals in their rooms, so they're going to stick with those.
But RJ would like to have his room painted and I am, I want to get that done for him. And on that same note, another thing I'm looking forward to is discovering and rediscovering hobbies. This again, goes back to really making sure I have time for myself, but there are things I'd really like to do for one, I have really started enjoying the small plants that I've been taking care of and for the most part I've kept them alive.
So I would kind of like to try some larger ones in the next year. I'd also like to do some gardening. I don't know how much gardening, because bending over is really hard for me. But gardening is one of those things that I've always wanted to do. I've aspired to be a gardener and I have never, ever put the time into it.
So who knows, but that is something I'd like to maybe try. Something that I have already been doing. And I'm looking forward to doing a lot more of is a stir frying and using a walk for cooking. I have actually made some new recipes that my family adores and we tested them on our various family members when they were here over the last month.
And they loved them. So getting better with walk cooking is a hobby. Like I love to cook cooking in general as a hobby for me, getting back into baking would be great, especially with the altitude change, but walk, cooking specifically, like. Be real honest. The thing I would love to figure out is that thing where you take, you can't see what I'm doing, but like, imagine I'm like doing like a winking off kind of hand gesture, but like where you shake the walk and like flip the stuff in the walk, I've always been too scared to try that with eggs or with pancakes or at the walk.
That's something that maybe by the end of 20, 22, I will have tried and been successful. That's a hope, but hobbies, hobbies in general, this also can go back to the larger scale art painting as well. You can tell a lot of these things are really they're, they're mixed in with each other, and you're probably going to hear a lot more of these when I actually set my goals for next year, because I think a lot of them are going to sort of surface there.
I would really like to. Rediscover a church community. So that was something that I had on my list for this year and with COVID and everything else that really was not feasible. I miss my Napa people a lot and I would love to reconnect with a new church community. They have started doing hybrid in person and at home services.
And I'd like to go in and just meet some people and introduce myself. The biggest thing that's kind of keeping me back is the, uh, the new variants. It's just it's stressful, but that is something that hopefully depending on how the world looks in the next year is something I would like to do in the next year.
And if all goes well by the fall, I would love to be at a point with a new church community where I am considering rejoining a choir with the church. The one that we are looking at has a lot of a very robust music program. Hi on my list and singing in choir at my church was one of my favorite things to do singing in my quartet.
My quintet, one of my favorite things to do the choir signups happened a few weeks ago and I very much considered doing it. Cause that's how I got into my previous church was by joining the choir very early on. I just don't have the time at the moment. I, my time is very splintered and I have not gotten to a place where I feel confident that I can make that time for myself.
So I don't want it to be something that feels like a burden to me, but it is high on my list of things to prioritize in the next year. Assuming I'm able to start meeting people at the church and assuming that's the church we want to stick with and that joining the choir is something that I still want to do once those sign-ups start.
So I talked about a bunch of things I really am looking forward to in this next year and at the heart of all of them and probably at the heart of my goal setting for this next year, which I haven't done yet, but I've been thinking a lot about it is really developing a good mix of work and personal life setting boundaries.
Trying to find some sort of harmony, all of those things. It's, it's high on my list. You're going to hear this over and over again from me, both in podcasts and on my YouTube videos and probably on my Instagram, because it is something that I am struggling so much with right now. And I really want to get some of my personal life back.
When your life is work and I love my work, please don't mistake me. I do. I'm doing stuff I love, but it's still work. Which means that a, there are times I don't love it. And B sometimes the things that used to bring me relaxation are not part of my work. So by their nature, they don't relax me anymore. On top of that, I also am so like, feeling so awful by being in kidney failure.
And having kids who are dealing with health problems themselves, that my life feels like just an endless hamster wheel of work and feeling like shit. And I want to find some room in my life for things that make me happy that fulfill me, that relax me, or just keep me in touch with the rest of my life outside of those aspects.
Even if it's not relaxing to redo cabinets or even if grocery shopping or whatever doesn't necessarily relax me. I'm starting to feel out of touch with parts of my life. And so one thing I am looking forward to in this next year is re redistributing the way my life looks reconnecting with parts of it and making sure that other parts that are getting that are kind of commanding more of my attention are, are given a much more reasonable level of attention.
So that I can take some of that and read distributed elsewhere. If that makes any sense, that's more than anything. What I'm looking forward to in this next year is making that a priority and seeing the ripple effects that it has and the other aspects of my life. And now that I've said all that, I really want to pick up my goal planner for next year and start setting my goals.
But I haven't decided which planner that is yet. So anyway, I'd love to find out from you something you are looking forward to. In the next year. So if you are on Instagram post, like a picture of this, whatever in your stories mentioned something you're looking forward to next year and tag me so I can see it.
It would make me really happy. Share this if you want to. I don't know. Just, I love talking to you. I don't care if this podcast gets big, I'm just happy to make it. That's all the only goal I really have for it is, is connecting. So let's connect as always. This podcast is sponsored by my patrons. They make everything I do possible, and I appreciate the ever-loving shit out of them.
If you are curious to know what it is like to be a patron, check out my Patrion at www.patreon.com/cindyguentertbaldo to find out more. Thank you so much for listening. I hope you have a fantastic rest of your week and until next time my dudes peace out.
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| 07 Feb 2022 | MY 2022 SELF CARE LIST | 148 | 00:20:53 | |
My 2022 word of the year is "replenish," in large part because I recognize that I need to replenish my personal life, my family life and my health, both physical and mental. Today I thought I'd talk through some of the self care things I am planning to incorporate this year to help me live into this whole replenishment situation. • DISCLAIMER Colorful words may be used. don't be alarmed. • NEWSLETTER • Etsy Shop is open! • FIND ME ON ALL THE THINGS YouTube - https://youtube.com/c/CindyGuentertBaldo Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/llamaletters/ Discord - https://discord.gg/Rwpp7Ww Pinterest - https://www.pinterest.com/llamaletters/ Website - www.cindyguentertbaldo.com • STUFF I MENTIONED My 2022 Goals - https://youtu.be/1_nVEMzrmq8 Inquiries - cindy@cindyguentertbaldo.com TRANSCRIPTIONIt's so easy to let other shit in our lives takeover while our own fulfillment and happiness and, and care falls by the wayside. Today, I'm going to be reflecting on my 20, 22 self care list in ways that I am going to replenish myself while I do all of the other things in my life that I am required to do that. I need to do that. I, that I want to do. Hi, everybody. Welcome to the uncurated life podcast. I'm Cindy Gunter, Baldo. And today we are reflecting on some self care and a big reason. I want to talk about this. Well, there's two big reasons for one. Um, part of it is because I think that sometimes this, the idea of self care gets all sort of out of whack on the Instagrams where it's, you know, things like get a facial and go on vacation, all that, which is all well and good. But. I think sometimes self care is doing what we need to make sure that we are leading the life or like a life that is as UN fettered is not the boredom. Maybe an burdened with excessive things like taking care of yourself in a way to prevent certain types of burnout or certain types of pain or certain types of injury from happening to you so that you can go through your life. Uneventful, maybe. I don't know. Anyway, I feel like some of the ways self-care has talked about just feels like both privileged and. Super hokey. And I want to talk about some of the things I want to focus on this year that I know will be more nourishing to my body and my mind. And secondly, the other big reason is that while I am a firm believer in serving others, like I am an over volunteer. I mean, shit. Like I, I fully believe that we can find so much peace in serving others. The cliche of not being able to pour from an empty pitcher, it does. It's a cliche for a reason. It holds true. Right? And this is really smacked me in the face this year. This past year, my life has been very up ended in 2021. Aside from just aside from the global pandemic, which in and of itself has appended so many of our, all of our lives in different ways. But this past year we had to move from California to Denver, uh, because of my husband's job. W our custody situation changed dramatically when the kids decided to come with us. Full-time one of my kids who was already struggling with mental health and physical health problems. Both of those things really spiraled this year. And so, so much of the second half of my year was devoted to them and the needs that they. On top of that, you know, I'm in kidney failure and the doctors appointments and everything else, it's just, it's become so easy. And I've said this here on the podcast and on my YouTube channel, it's been so easy for my life to just be work and doctor's appointments and that's it. And it's, it's just gotten really hard. Things have been, I'm like running on fumes. It feels like now believe me, when I say I know I was needed in all of those circumstances and others that I'm not even going to bring up here. Cause I don't, that's not what this book. I don't want it to go on for that long, but. Those situations needed me and I would not have made other choices given the chance. I knew that I needed to be here for my family. I knew that I needed to be here for my husband here for my kids here in our move and taking care of myself the best I can. I recognize I was doing the best I could in those circumstances, but that MTS pitcher situation, the cliche I was talking about it's me right now. I'm dry, dry a fucking. My picture is, is fucking dusty. So this year a big piece of my goals has had to do with replenishing my life, which is why replenish is actually my word of the year. And I'll link the video where I talk about my 20, 22 goals in the show notes. Uh, it's, it's really important to me this year that I, that I try to, to. I keep coming in the words, replenish and nourish are the words I keep using, but they're really kind of what I want to use because I, if another crisis happens right now, I don't, I mean, I'm sure I'll rise to the occasion, but I am so close to burning out in so many different areas of my life. And I know when I hit burnout really hard, it takes a major toll on my health mentally and physically, and currently, especially with my physical health. There, isn't a lot of. For that, like my physical health is already on a thread to begin with. So burning out really hard. It would just be a major problem and it would impact more than just me. So this self self-care list we're going to talk about today is really. Just it's a list of ideas for me to like, for me specifically, to talk through them with you, but also to give you some thoughts as to things you might want to try and incorporate into your life, this. So that we can all like take better care of ourselves. I also have a free, like little printable infographic thing. If you sign up for my email newsletter this month with some of these ideas on it, some ideas for you. If you're already on the newsletter, it's going to come. I believe today, today is the first Monday of the month. So it should be in your inboxes today. But if you are new, then go sign up for the newsletter and you'll get it as a little bonus. Whatever. Anyway, let's talk about this. Let's talk about my self care list and I invite you to think about your own ideas while I'm talking about this and share them on social media. You can email me Cindy at Cindy country, baldor.com. You can respond to the email newsletter that goes. I see all of those responses, or you can post it on Instagram, in your stories and tag me at @llamaletters with some self-care ideas. So we can kind of co like collate them and have a big list because that would be. So let's talk about it, right? First of all, and I'm kind of thinking about these in terms of buckets. So the first bucket is to care for my physical health and this, this is probably the easiest one for me to figure out because I am in kidney failure and I have very specific things I need to be doing in order to be compliant for transplant. In order for me to be feeling as good as I can when like, my, my average is not very good, but I don't feel very good on the average. But even that average, sometimes it can be hard to reach when I'm not doing the things I'm supposed to be doing. So. It's it's amazing when you're this deep into a chronic illness, when tiny fuck-ups can make you feel so bad for so long, it really makes you think about that. And you forget when you were back in the day, when you might've felt better on a normal basis, how you took for granted the little fuck-ups and you could do that. And it wouldn't like kill you. Like, even if you're not, even if you're just you're you're fully, you're fully health. And you don't have a chronic illness. If you are older than the age of say 30, you probably can recognize that you, if you try to have like a night out drinking with your friends, the way you did, when you were 21, the recovery period is so much longer like two drinks, and you're hung over for like a day, as opposed to before where you could pound drinks and feel like sprightly the next morning, because you're getting older and your body just can't handle it as much as. Well, for me, it's like that, but it's with all sorts of small things. If I eat three McDonald's singular, McDonald's French fries. I swell up and I feel like I'm going to die for the rest of the evening. Like, that's the kind of thing that I need to keep an eye out for. So for my caring, for my physical health bucket on my list is making sure, taking my meds consistently taking my blood pressure every day, which is a big one that I'm still struggling. Even into this year, getting enough water, giving up soda, going outside every day, going for walks every day, getting on my Peloton on a regular basis, all of these things while they sound just like health maintenance things for me are truly self care because a by doing them, I am ensuring that I'm going to feel as good as I can on any given day and B uh, it helps me so that. Um, when it comes time for transplant, not only am I in as good enough of constitution as I can be for transplant, but also the transplant center will have no reason to thumbs down me. There's all these, you know, articles in the paper about people being denied, kidney transplants or heart transplants, because they refuse to get the COVID vaccine. And all I have to say to that is motherfucker. Do you know anything about organ transplant? It's not just the COVID vaccine, a it's all vaccines B uh, It's a. That's all vaccines. And if you're not compliant, not just with vaccines, but with everything they tell you to do, then they won't do it because getting a transplant not only requires the, the gift of life that is the organ, but so many people and so much time and resources go into a transplant that they do like, and there's a limited supply of both organs and. The teams to actually perform the transplants that they want to make sure the organs are going to the people who are going to make sure they take care of it. Anyway, as a tangent point, being caring for my physical health, it's all the basic habits I know I should be doing, and I just need to be consistent. Next is caring for my mental health and this year, a big piece of that is going to be in reclaiming time for myself. So time off time off that I take with my kids or my husband or both, but also time to take off just for me, like to go have a cup of coffee on my own, or to go to a movie, or I'm probably not going to a movie it's still pandemic time, but like doing things for me just on my own that are not working like. Cultivating hobbies that have nothing to do with work like acrylic painting. I'm working on some for my living room right now and cooking with my walk. Although I haven't been doing that much since my, I had a couple of falls recently and I jacked my hands up and I just haven't had the, the nerve to, to cook with the walk, but that's on my list, you know? Uh, the houseplants I'm trying to deal with that will actually show up in another bucket and prioritizing personal planning over work planning. That for me is probably the biggest piece of self-care that I've already been successful with. And it's already starting to show some subtle results is sitting down every morning with my coffee and pulling my personal planner out first. And thinking about my day outside of work has been pretty epic so far, and I'm using. And I mean, epic, like it's been really great so far in forcing me to really focus on my life as a whole, not just work, which is something I was not doing this past six months. Or even fucking that six years, Jesus, but like it's, it's felt really good. I noticing some changes just in my home life, in terms of the way I'm present in my home life. So that in and of itself of all of them is the biggest piece of this, but really prioritizing time for myself as well as time with my kids. And my husband has been is, is already like high on my list for this year and is going to stay high on my list for the. The next category is my spiritual health. Now I am not someone who believes in, in, in like gods or a God or whatever. I am a humanist, but I'm also a, you, you and I have really been missing my, you you community. I. Had really taken a step away from it during the pandemic because of my kidney function dropping so drastically, I've been so involved with it before being on the board and everything else. But between between feeling like shit and also like everything going virtual, I wound up taking a strong step. Even before we found out about the Denver move. My step back had been pretty, pretty hardcore. Now that we've moved, uh, we have a new, you, you congregation we'd like to start visiting, but with the Omicron variant, they'd gone back to virtual services. And I was I'm, I'm really not a fan of the virtual services just in general. So I wasn't sure, but I'm going to start attending those at least once a month. And I really want to start introducing myself to people. My hope is by the end of, by the end of this year to be. In their choir, like to have joined the congregation and then joined the choir, assuming choir stuff is going to happen. You know? So that is one way to really care for my spiritual health, but in other and other, another aspect of that is reading. I actually have a bunch of books on my Kindle waiting for me to read them. And some of them are fiction. You know, I'm going to read new fantasy series this year, blah, blah, blah. But a big piece of that is reading books that fill me. Spiritual cup and the books in that category tend to be books sort of in a few different veins. Right? I have some books I want to read that are about, they're like deep dives into different aspects of religion, which for me, the seeking of knowledge about other faiths, other religions, I've always been a big piece of my spiritual life. Not because I believe in the things that these books say, but because I like to draw my own bits of wisdom from different faith traditions, even if the dogma of them is not something that I'm super into, but also really learning about other religions is something that really gives me a lot of spiritual nourishment. I don't know if that makes sense, but it makes sense to me, the. There's two other kinds of chunks of books, sort of in this category. Another chunk of books and books in this category are books that are kind of social justice, a bent of social justice. I've got a handful of those that I really want to read. Um, and then finally, the final kind of chunk of those is some books specifically written. There's an author named Kate bowler. She's a minister and a teacher, I believe at duke university. And I've read one of her books. It was called. Looking at my Kindle app because it was called, uh everything's. Um, Whereas it, everything happens for a reason. And I was like, oh fuck you. Right. But then the subtitle is, and other lies I've loved. And this is a great book that she wrote about her feelings when she was diagnosed with cancer. She has another book that just came out. Called, uh, no cure for being human and other truths. I need to hear so that one's on my list of books to read as well as this goes to the more history of other faith traditions. But she's got a book called blessed, which is about the, um, the history of the prosperity gospel and that one I've started, but I haven't finished yet. And so books like that are on my list. To care for my spiritual health, you know, just expanding my horizons, reading about other people's perspectives, reading, things like that. That's, that's kind of on my list. So anyway, that's that bucket then? There's the situational health, which is caring for my situational health, which. A lot of that has to do with the house, the, my space, my, the place around me and everything like that. So on this list is a lot of like project based self care stuff. Right. So working on my home environment with. Organizing and projects. I'm trying to get at least one organization project under my belt each month. This year, uh, last month I put all my Christmas decorations away in reorganize, the big closets down here, which felt so good when it was done this month, I'm going to be working on my closet. I'm also going to be working on, oh, what did I say? I was going to work on this month. You know, it's amazing when you don't remember shit, even though you just said. Uh, the laundry room is on my list. Cause I have some cabinets that I want to reorganize and I wanna get one of those little racks that hangs off the wall that you can unfold to hang, you know, like sweaters and shit from anyway point being, is that working like doing organizational projects around my house is so much fun for me, but I need to actually make the time for it. Otherwise I start to get stressed out and then I don't do it because I'm worried I don't have the time for it. Definitely that I would love to start a raised bed garden in the spring. I could put a garden in the ground if I wanted to, but a, our soul, uh, soil here is Sandy because we are near the dam and they, I guess when they dug out for the reservoir, they put all the sand in RNA. So it takes a lot of work to get the sand really ready for green vegetables. And I'm just, I don't have that many fucks to give right now. Plus I've seen some raised, a friend of mine showed me some raised bed gardens that are like waist high. Like they're up on stand so that you don't have to bend over so much, which is huge for me because bending over is one of the hardest things for me because of my kidneys. So I'd love to do that. Um, I want to find a new farmer's market this year that it's going to be our new favorite that we go to on a regular basis. I want to play with my Layla and my, my Layla puppy and my Lulu kitty. I want to care for and add to my indoor houseplant collection, which one of my goals for this year on my bucket list goals for this year is to get a large one. And we will see how that goes. I actually, as I'm recording this, have a couple of plants that according to my plan to app are going to be, need to be repotted soon. And that's going to be an adventure cause I've never done that successfully. So we will see how that goes. All of those things around the house, decorating the walls and doing the projects, playing with the dogs, going outside, stuff that has to do with my environment. That is my situational health. And that's what I really want to care for this year. And a lot of my goals are kind of based around this, this, uh, particular candidate. And then finally, and this is one that is hard for me to say, because it doesn't feel like self care when I say it. And that is caring for my financial health. I I've talked about it before. I have a very stressed out relationship with money. So the thought of doing stuff with finances does not feel like self care. When I say it it's like seen, it sounds like self torture. But ultimately I know it will bring me peace to feel in control of things because when I feel out of control, I feel very unpeaceful so feeling like I've got at least some level of control over things will help me feel peace, some peace. And also knowing that I have taken care of some of these kinds of adult things will also help me feel peace. So some of the things on this list would be to hire an accountant this year. Um, set up automatic savings and retirement, which I actually did already. And it feels pretty good. We'll see how it feels as it starts happening. Um, and having meetings with Jesse about money, trying to help both my kids with their first bank accounts to have good money habits, and then model them for them as well. Like I flat out told RJ, I was like, yeah, I'm not the person you want to look to for good money habits. Look to Jesse, but we'll do this together. Caring for my financial health is part of it because I know that that's a source of stress for me. And if I can just face some of those fears that might actually bring me a level of peace, which is important for self care. So these are some of my ideas for self care in 2022, I would love to hear from you either via email or on Instagram, what some of your ideas for self-care are this year. So be sure to tag me at @llamaletters, let me know. Anyway, thank you so much to my patrons for sponsoring this episode, as they always do. If you are curious about becoming a patron, you can check out www.patreon.com/cindyguentertbaldo to find out. I hope this year is full of ways for you to take care of yourself because you are fabulous. You deserve it. You are not unworthy. And that's important to understand I'm saying this for you. I'm saying this for myself as well. So just remember that. Look yourself in the eye in the mirror and know that you are working. Because that's, it just is. Ooh, somebody loves me anyway. I hope you have a wonderful rest of your day rest of your week. I'll catch you next time. And until next time then peace out. | |||
| 06 Jan 2020 | Where Does My Time Go? | #92 | 00:17:49 | |
One of my goals in the first quarter of 2020 is to figure out where my time is going so I can use it more efficiently and set better boundaries. But before I start time tracking (down to the minute - I'll explain in a later episode) I wanted to take a second and make some assumptions... where do I *think* my time is going? The difference between what I'm actually doing and what I think I'm doing is an important one, I think, and I invite you to reflect on the same thing!
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| 18 Apr 2022 | 158 | EVO PLANNER PERSONALITY TEST | 00:11:06 | |
In today's installment of personality tests taken by a cynic, I'm actually doing a collab with my youtube channel! Today's test is the Brain Type Assessment, so you can purchase your appropriate Evo Planner! • DISCLAIMER Colorful words may be used. don't be alarmed. • NEWSLETTER • Etsy Shop is open! • FIND ME ON ALL THE THINGS YouTube - https://youtube.com/c/CindyGuentertBaldo Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/llamaletters/ Discord - https://discord.gg/Rwpp7Ww Pinterest - https://www.pinterest.com/llamaletters/ Website - www.cindyguentertbaldo.com • STUFF I MENTIONED Inquiries - cindy@cindyguentertbaldo.com | |||
| 28 Mar 2022 | MY CURRENT READING CHECK IN | 155 | 00:17:36 | |
SHOWNOTESI know a bunch of you are readers - today I'm giving you a bunch of books that I'm either reading or want to read! • DISCLAIMER Colorful words may be used. don't be alarmed. • NEWSLETTER • Etsy Shop is open! • FIND ME ON ALL THE THINGS YouTube - https://youtube.com/c/CindyGuentertBaldo Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/llamaletters/ Discord - https://discord.gg/Rwpp7Ww Pinterest - https://www.pinterest.com/llamaletters/ Website - www.cindyguentertbaldo.com • STUFF I MENTIONED (these are affiliate links - I receive compensation if you purchase through them) The Exorcist - https://amzn.to/3hem73D The Leftovers - https://amzn.to/3JQleeb Courtesan - https://amzn.to/33KquR8 Catherine The Great - https://amzn.to/3Hfo4Ye Peter The Great - https://amzn.to/3JM2goV Burnout - https://amzn.to/3s9SBlW The Fifth Season - https://amzn.to/3vbd1NC We Are Not Like Them - https://amzn.to/3h9IY0h Hello Habits - https://amzn.to/3v8qohn Inquiries - cindy@cindyguentertbaldo.com TRANSCRIPTIONWe're talking books today, my friends we're talking books, I'm Cindy Guentert-Baldo. Welcome to the uncurated life podcast, where we talk about life on and off of the internet. And today my husband is walking around upstairs too. You might be picking up a bunch of that noise and there's nothing I can do about it, but we're going to drown it out with talk of books. One of my favorite things to talk about, I might do this more often if you guys like it, but I'm going to give you three books in three different categories. Those categories are. Three books. I read recently that I enjoyed and want to tell you about three books. I'm in the middle of that. I am enjoying and am hoping that I will continue to enjoy, but books I'm starting and then three books that I want to read that on my TBR list and I'm going to be attacking next. So hopefully somewhere in these nine books, you'll find something that's interesting to you. So let's start first at the books that I've already read recently. They're all fiction. One of them is historical fiction. Uh, these were all first time reads. I believe I may have read one of them years and years ago, but I don't remember. So those three books we'll start with the one. I think I may have read a long time ago, but I don't think I have. And that is the Exorcist by William Peter Blatty. You I'm sure you've heard of the movie. Uh, the book was written before the. The book is excellent. The movie is an excellent adaptation of the book. If you enjoyed enjoy, it might not be the right word. If you, if the movie was something you were into, you may be into the book. The movie is a very straightforward adaptation of the book. I would suggest that there's like a little bit more color or flavor to the book than there is in the movie, as there is with any book adaptation. But if you're not. If you weren't into the movie or whatever, or if the movie was too much for you while the book is not super graphic, it is intense. So there is that, but I enjoyed it. I actually have the SQL Legion, which I know he wrote after the movie came out. And is what the third movie was based on what that one scary fucking scene that's like fucking terrifying if you know, you know, I haven't read that one yet though, but I have it. I'm pretty sure I've read that one before though. I think I remember getting it from a garage sale years and years when I was a kid, but I don't remember it very well. Anyway, that's neither here nor there. So yes, the first book is the Exorcist. The second book on my list that I read recently and really enjoyed was the leftovers by Tom Parata. This is the book that the TV show was based on. I have not seen the show. I've only watched the pilot episode, but have not really made time to sit and watch through the show. But I had heard the show was interesting and I had heard that the book was good. I am a fan of dystopian fiction. I am. Of end times fiction, uh, all those sorts of things. I thought it could be really interesting. And it was, it was a very interesting book, kind of a quiet book, kind of, uh, um, contemplate of almost, but a good book, not high adventure at all. If you're looking for like an adventurous dystopian style book, this is not the book for you, but if you're, if you enjoyed what was one that I recommended in my newsletter recently, uh, never let me go the book about the donor. If you enjoyed that book, you may really love the leftovers. It has that same kind of mundane in a world, surrounded by what the fuck kind of situation. Really liked it. And then the third book I read recently is another one I've talked about on live streams and that is court isn't by Diane Hagar. It's a historical fiction book that is about Deanna , who was the main mistress of Henri. The second, I believe it was on rave. Second of France. He was married to Catherine and they had a whole bunch of kids, but the end of TA was his teres on teacher. On teacher. I believe that's how you, I don't speak French, like the main, the official mistress. Right. And she was his alleged true love and was like one of the main political power movers in the kingdom where I see his wife was kind of pushed to the side, Catherine Domenici, wands Ryan's up taking a lot more power into her own when her husband dies in her kids become a king. That's not what the book is about. The book is mainly about, uh, the relationship between DeAnn, Henri and Catherine. And it was a very, very fun read. I would suggest that if you like reading historical fiction, especially historical fiction, along the lines of say Philip Gregory, where there is some liberties taken with the history, there's recognizable history, but there's also plenty of liberties, especially when it comes to adding in sexy times, you will probably enjoy this. So those are the three that I have read recently that I enjoyed the three books. I am either reading or just cracking into, I have not gotten very far in any of these yet, but I am starting them. So I just thought I would let you know, two of them are books that apparently are the first two in a series of four about the Romanoffs. So, uh, Hear me out here. So I started watching, I watched the great, right. I watched both seasons of it, which I am fully aware that it is historical fiction in the sense that it has, like, it's a little Iqua of historical fiction, right? Like if fruit sneezes in the general direction of a fruit flavored sparkling water, then the great history sneezed in the general direction of the show. And they even, they mention it like in the title of the show, it's like an occasionally true story or whatever. But like most historical fiction, at least for me, what winds up happening is I, I see enjoyable historical fiction. And when I'm done with it, I immediately want to find out what really happened. So when I was done watching the great, I decided to look up some biographies to find one on Catherine. The great, and I discovered that this, uh, reporter named Robert J uh, Robert K. Massey had written a book about Catherine, the great, and he had written a book about Peter, the great who shows up sort of in. In the gray. And I was like, Ooh. So I got both of them. And I started reading them. The reason I went with his books is because I had already read two of his books, which were both about the Romanoffs. They were about Nicholas and Alexander. One's called Nicholas and Alexandra. And the other one is called the Romanovs the final chapter or something like that. It's about like the last year of their lives. And I had read both of those and I had enjoyed them both as books, but also his writing style. It's very important to me. If I'm going to read a biography that I enjoy the writers, the authors writing style. Otherwise, I can't get through it. I need biographies to read at least somewhat like a novel. They could be very much full of facts, but they need the writing style needs to be an enjoyable one for me to read. And I liked his books. And so I was fine picking up those two, but then I realized when I pick them up that they're technically those two books and the two I've already read are a series of four book series about the most famous Romanov. So Catherine, the great Peter, the great and Nicholas and Alexandra and their kids. So I was like, oh cool. I'm just reading it backwards order. Anyway. So both of these books, one of them is called Catherine, the great portrait of a woman and the other is called Peter the great his life and the world. Um, and I will mention these are all linked. All the books I'm talking about are linked in the show notes, other Amazon affiliate links. So using those links will support this podcast. I appreciate that, but if you don't want to, uh, if you don't want to use those links, you can just Google the books and find them. Anyway, just started both of them. I'm barely into them, but I did really like the other books. If you're into biographies and you're into historical biographies, these may be books for you to give you some context as to other biographies that I've read and really enjoyed the writing style. In case you have read biographies and like to know kind of where I gravitate. I really like Antonia Frazier's writing her book on Marie Antoinette is probably one of my favorite biography books of all time. And then, uh, Jeff Gwynne has written some fantastic biographies. The ones I've read of his are, um, his book on Charles Manson, his book on Bonnie and Clyde, which is just fucking outstanding. And his book on Jones. Uh, great, you know, super cheerful reading materials, Cindy. Anyway, that just gives you an idea of some of the biography sort of writing styles that I tend to gravitate towards. So those are books I'm working on. I will report back on how good they are, but in general, They are something that I'm excited about. The final book I'm working on was actually sent to me by the authors, but it was already on my radar. It was going to be a book club book last year before I had to basically shut the book club down until I could figure out what I wanted to do with it, especially with the move. And that is called burnout. The secret to unlocking the stress cycle by Amelia and Emily. Nagorski their sisters. Uh, they S Emilia center. And I am just about to get into it, but one of the reasons I've been looking forward to reading it is because I have been burned out so badly and I'm, I'm sitting on the edge of burnout right now. And what I would like to do is get to a point where I can recognize the signs earlier so that I can avoid it a lot more efficient. Not just for the sake of being productive, but for the sake of my own mental health. So I'm starting that book. I have heard wonderful things about it. It has been recommended to me so many times by so many people who I think see the signs of burnout in me. I actually have it. They sent it to me and I'd actually bought it last year too. I found it on my Kindle. So I've got two versions of it and I'm going to be digging into it. It might be the book I take on the airplane with me to go wild. Um, you guys are. Few weeks later, but I'm recording early. So there is that, but I had, I have just cracked into it. And again, there's there all three books or books I just started, but I am very excited to dig into all of them. And I think what's going to happen is the burnout book will be a travel book. And the two books about the greats will be my bedside books to read before bed. Anyway, moving forward from those three books that are on my TBR list, I actually own two of them and need to buy the other. But I will be starting those ones right away. Two of them are fiction. One of them is non-fiction and the August we'll start with a nonfiction book, which is one that caught my eye while I was at of all fucking places, an Amazon store. I was there at the mall there for something else, and I saw it and I got sucked into it and I bought it. And that is called hello habits, a minimalist guide to a better life by . Now I have no interest in being a minimalist. I love my stuff. I love my stuff and I'm happy with my stuff, but I am interested in habits and how we build them. And I have read atomic habits. It's a great book. But I'm curious to read other books on building habits. And this one seems like an interesting one and I'll be the real, the cover just was fancy looking. And I was like, okay. So I have that sitting on my kitchen counter. That's the non-fiction book that I am excited to start reading, but I have a lot of other nonfiction books I bought because I was excited to start reading them. And then I didn't. So we'll see how that goes. So I'll check back in with you. The two books that are fiction are both books. I am very excited about. The first one is the one I do not own yet. And that is the fifth season by NK. Jemisin many of you in my audience, my patrons, whoever who are fed to see readers have recommended NK Jemisin to me, like hardcore recommended her to me. She's a woman of color. She's black, I believe. And she has written. Uh, apparently some outstanding fantasy. I love fantasy. One of my bucket list items this year is to read a new fantasy series new to me because I'm a reader. And so often I will gravitate towards rereading something like the wheel of time that I have already read a million times before, but I wanted to start with her. It was either her brand in Sanderson. And I wanted to start with her mainly because Brandon Sanderson much like Robert Jordan is, is a girthy writer. He was. Like doorstop books. And I would like something a little less, uh, massive to start with. And her, her BR I think it's the broken earth trilogy, which is what the fifth season is the first book. It's a trilogy, it's three books. So it's an easily digestible series for someone like me who tends to blow through books. I have high hopes for. Um, I don't have a lot of information about it yet, but I'm excited I'm gonna order it. And I will probably start that one as soon. Maybe that will be my reward to myself for when I finished one of the biographies of the great one of the greats, or I might just pick it up because currently those three books that I've got on deck, none of them are fiction. So I might just pick that one up the other, or I might start with the other fiction book on my list, which is we are not like them by Christine pride and Jo Piazza. Now I found out about this book, which is a story about. A white woman and a black woman who are friends and then there's like a police shooting and how they grapple with it. It's supposed to be a really good fiction standalone book. I heard about it because Jo Piazza, the white co-author, the other author, Katherine Christine pride is black. Uh, Joe Piazza is the host of the under the influence podcast, which I've talked about on the show before. Um, and so I had heard about it that way. So. It just sounds like a good book. And I might start with that one because since it's not a series, it's a one-off. I can usually blow through one of those very quickly, either way. All three of those books are books I'm super interested in and what I might wind up doing. Well may wind up happening is I may take like the Catherine the great book and work on that. Set the Peter the great book aside and grab a fiction book and stick it in there. Because what I find is if I overdo it on biographies and nonfiction, my joy of reading plummets, it's like a fucking erection that just like go sad. When you think about, you know, something heinous. Taxes or something. I don't know. My penis goes pew. When I read too much nonfiction and, and biographies now non-fiction tends to be the, the most, not the biographies aren't non-fiction but I like self-help versus biography basically is what I'm talking about here. And even that I was going to spend some time with this podcast talking about genres and trying to avoid, and self-help was going to be like the number one. But then I realized I bought that habits book and that self-help. So maybe I didn't actually think about that too clearly, but what I have found is for me, if all I try to do is read books that I'm reading for like a quote productive reason, or a learning reason, my joy of reading disappears. I do like reading books like that, but they need to be. Balanced with fiction books that I'm just reading because I love reading. There has to be some level of that when it comes to reading. And so that's, that's maybe the lesson I'm leaving you with today's to recognize what kind of a reader you are. Are you somebody who can read more than one book at once? I tend to be somebody who gets made fun of by my family because I leave books open on the couch to the page I'm on. And they'll be like four different books that I'm going with at any given time, because that's just the way that I read. But it's very important to me that I read books that are. There's a mixture of them. Now, if I go all fiction, like I did in January reading those books, we already talked about that's different. I'm fine reading all fiction all the time. But I do like to bring in nonfiction books and biographies and other books like that because I do enjoy reading those, but they are not the books I gravitate towards when I'm really just reading for pleasure and reading for relaxation. My first. Instinct is to go to fiction. And while I can relax reading these other things, I do like to, to spread it out. I will also add I'm not somebody who takes notes in the books that I read. I do, if they're non-fiction and I feel like I need to, but a lot of the times I just read it. That's just my style. That's just the way I tend to do things. I have wanted to be like a book journaler. I have that I'm always fully booked planner. I looked at recently where I'm like, yeah, fuck. Yeah, I'm going to fill this out. Probably not though. So I just wanted to bring that up though. Give you an idea of what I've been reading, what I'm planning to read and how I'm sort of approaching my reading right now. I'm not trying to like schedule time to read. That's never worked for me. I just need to have my book. Available by Kindle needs to be charged. My books need to be out where I can find them so I can pick them up when I feel the moment, especially if I'm trying to aim towards grabbing my phone and opening up candy crush. Instead, again, listen to the boredom podcast. If you'd like to, or the one other one that came out recently about hobbies, talking a lot about that shit lately. And it's true. Like if I have the books available, I will write. So that's what I'm going to work on. I'd love to hear from you anything you've enjoyed reading recently, something that you have on your TBR list. Let me know, tag me in your stories on Instagram at @llamaletters so that I can see what you're reading. I'm curious. Maybe I'll add some books to my list. I love books. If you love books, let me know. This is not a book podcast, but there will be books talked about here, just like. In the meantime, don't forget to thank my patrons. They sponsored these episodes. They're awesome. www.patreon.com/cindyguentertbaldo. And you will find out more. And until next time, my friends, I hope you find a good book to read. I hope you enjoy it and I'll see you next time. Peace out. | |||
| 09 Mar 2020 | A Planner Event Survival Guide | #107 | 00:18:13 | |
After spending some time at the Chicago Planner Conference recently, I thought I'd take some time to give my best tips for surviving a larger planner conference or event, especially from the perspective of someone with chronic pain or illness.
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| 04 Nov 2019 | Subscriber Pet Peeves (Part 1) | #82 | 00:22:12 | |
Today is part 1 of at least 2 parts (maybe more) of a call in show, talking about YOUR pet peeves as a subscriber/watcher of YouTube. I decided to make this a multipart episode as you have a lot of opinions!
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Get my newsletter! https://mailchi.mp/cindyguentertbaldo/podcast Preorder my book! https://amzn.to/2XIuqgg (affiliate link) Cigna Article on Chronic Loneliness - https://www.cigna.com/individuals-families/health-wellness/chronic-loneliness
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Cindy Guentert-Baldo 4225 Solano Ave. #601 Napa, CA 94558
Inquiries - cindy@cindyguentertbaldo.com | |||
| 02 Nov 2020 | Raise Your Glass | #123 | 00:05:53 | |
This one is for all of you - a bit of mellowness in a week full of potential upheaval.
Get two months of Skillshare Premium for free with this link (affiliate link) - https://www.skillshare.com/r/profile/Cindy-Guentert-Baldo/3618925
This episode is sponsored by my Patrons. Learn more by checking out my Patron Page!
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Poem - https://www.uua.org/worship/words/poetry/let-artists-win Hadestown - https://www.hadestown.com/ My Video - https://youtu.be/8blR0Z6L9F0
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Cindy Guentert-Baldo 4225 Solano Ave. #601 Napa, CA 94558
Inquiries - cindy@cindyguentertbaldo.com | |||
| 19 Oct 2020 | The Small Things | #122 | 00:03:42 | |
Take a moment today for this quick thought about the small things we take for granted. | |||
| 30 Dec 2019 | How To ACTUALLY Achieve Your Goals | #90 | 00:18:40 | |
Today I’m chatting about three things I’ve learned about setting goals and actually achieving them, as opposed to my usual MO of forgetting what they are by February 1st.
CHECK OUT MY SHOP! https://www.etsy.com/shop/CGBPrints EMAIL NEWSLETTER FOR BOOK CLUB! https://mailchi.mp/cindyguentertbaldo/podcast Preorder my book! https://amzn.to/2XIuqgg (affiliate link) Book Club: Good Morning Good Life (affiliate link) - https://amzn.to/2LDZyWW Book Club: Good Morning Good Life Planner (affiliate link) - https://amzn.to/36xWKm9
Creativity For All - Simple Artistic Exercises In 10 Minutes Or Less - Get two months of Skillshare Premium free! https://www.skillshare.com/r/profile/Cindy-Guentert-Baldo/3618925
This episode is sponsored by my Patrons. Learn more by checking out my Patron Page!
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Cindy Guentert-Baldo 4225 Solano Ave. #601 Napa, CA 94558
Inquiries - cindy@cindyguentertbaldo.com | |||
| 17 Jan 2022 | Which COLOR Am I?! The Color Code Personality Test | 145 | 00:12:56 | |
I’m continuing my personality test journey (with a healthy amount of skepticism) with the Color Code Personality Test!
Colorful words may be used. don't be alarmed.
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Color Code Test - https://www.colorcode.com/
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TRANSCRIPTIONHello everybody. It is the uncurated life podcast. I'm Cindy Guentert-Baldo. And today we are continuing my series on personality tests, especially from my point of view, as somebody who's kind of cynical and skeptical about personality tests. Although the last one, which was the Myers-Briggs test, kind of shocked me a little bit.
But we're moving on to a fun one today. One that's been requested. It's the colors, personality test. Now I find a few different versions of this online, but decided to go with the one that looked the quote most accurate, which is the color code test, which whew are you personality test. So allegedly it identifies both what you do and why.
And it separates you into four colors and this is pulled directly from the website. Reds need to look good, technically be right, and be respected. They are strong leaders and love challenges. Blues need to have integrity and be appreciated. They are focused on quality and creating strong relationships.
Whites need to be accepted and treated with kindness. They are logical objective and tolerant of others. Yellows need to be noticed and have fun. They love life, social connection and being positive and spontaneous. So that's basically the information here. Um, I don't have a lot of background information.
Like I said, it's sort of all over the place, but it is something like much like a lot of the other personality tests. They have stuff on the website saying, well, you could use this to build a better business or to build a better team or whatever, but I basically just want to take it and find out what they have to say.
So I'm at the website, www.colorcode.com. And I'm heading right over to the tab that says personality test. So when you get there, you have two options. There's the basic analysis, which is a quick and free way to sample the color code personality or. You can do the full analysis, which is a completely customized result, which is designed to fully analyze your personality.
Now I'm going to pay for it because I, uh, science, I guess I've been paying for the more advanced versions of all of these. And I don't know if I'm wasting money or not, but I'm going to write it off on my taxes. So there you go. This should give me a good report as well as a lot of personnel development shit, which I've gotten from the other ones too.
I'm not really worried about that. So I'm going to start taking my test and I will report back as soon as I'm done. All right. I'm done with the test. It's actually a very quick test and the questions are all, there's a series of like, you pick a word and then you, there's some statements you pick and it's all having to do with how you were as a child.
So I think that in and of itself, that to me makes me wonder how accurate this can be, because it's based on your own memory of being a kid. And I'm almost 42. So that was a while ago. Right. But let's, let's go and let's look at my results and it's. Fucking in depth personality test report on me. So let's go first and foremost to my main color.
Cause it gives you a main color in this report and a secondary color. And my main color, which is overall it's 64% is red. And then my secondary color is blue at 24%. And then the other two white and yellow are eight and 3%. So very much a red with a secondary blue. So let's go and read what it says about me as a red.
It says, congratulations, Cindy, your core color of red means you have the driving core motive of power.
This, this is a red, you need to look good technically to those whose opinions matter, your intellectual prowess is often admired and emulated. You're a born leader. You seek act action and are highly productive. You can be highly critical of those who, uh, dissatisfy your expectations. I agree with a lot of that.
You need to be right. Yes. And this, I think goes back to when I was a kid, I would say one of my main characteristics and my sisters will agree with this. I was, I was pretty bossy, bossy and impatient. And I know that there is some level of like patriarchy when it comes to telling little girls that they're bossy, but like, I was bossy.
Like I, I still kind of am actually. Anyway, it says that reds need approval in a way that is different from the other colors, yellows want approval from everyone around them, but it only matters to reds when it comes from people who are important to you, people who you respect. So I don't necessarily need approval from people.
I don't give a shit about. Tracks with me, it also says is a red that I can lack or have struggles with intimacy, like building intimate relationships, which is entirely true for me. So who knows, maybe I am a red let's look at my secondary color. So it says here that I have a blue, secondary color. There are advantages and disadvantages to that.
The major advantage is that people with a strong secondary color can naturally work to develop the positive traits of that color. In your case, Cindy, you should pursue the development of the strengths of the blue secondary color as they will make you even more effective as a person. The disadvantage of possessing a blue secondary color is that it challenges the aspects of your red core.
You may send mixed signals, which also tracks. One moment you'll act red. The other you'll act blue. This behavior can confuse people and make it difficult for them to know how you will react to any given situation. In other words, you may appear to be more inconsistent than would appear as somebody without a strong secondary color.
As a core red with secondary blue, there will never be a dull moment in your life. You possess one of the most complex personalities of all the color combinations. You face an intense internal struggle and often give mixed messages to those. With whom you interact, you can. Someone for making a mistake one minute, then feel guilty and offered to treat him or her to lunch.
The next you move forcefully through life, creating action and impacting others as you go. But when you feel those impacts might've been negative, your secondary blue personality leaves, you feeling very deep, remorse and guilt. Oh my God. Okay. That makes me feel called out. There was a day, the other day where cat really wanted to make whipped cream with the heavy whipping cream that we had in the fridge, like in the.
And I was like, no, I'm gonna use this for dinner and Catholic, but mom, we can always get more. You're not making it tonight. And I'm like, yeah, I want it now. Don't and I got super mad and then realized how ridiculous I was being and apologized and let Kat make the whipped cream. But like everybody in the house was looking at me like Cindy, you're fucking like all over the place.
And apparently this agrees with that. Now there's another section here in the paid for version where it gives you red needs, red wants than blue needs and blue wants. And what it suggests is that I circle the top two or three that are the most critical to. So let's take a look for red needs to be right, to be respected, to hide insecurities tightly, and to look good intellectually.
I would say that if I'm being real honest with myself, the most important ones to me are to be right. The most on that list to be right. And maybe till it good intellectually, if I'm being real honest, uh, for red wants reds, want to receive selective approval to please yourself, to lead others and to experience challenging adventure.
I would say from that list, if I was going to pick two, I would say to receive selective approval and to lead others now for the blue needs, they are to be good, morally, to be appreciated, to be understood and to receive acceptance. And I would say easily looking at that list that my top two needs there would be to be good morally, and to be appreciated.
And then for blue wants to reveal insecurities to enjoy security, to be autonomous and to please others. And from that list, I can again, easily pick two, and that would be to enjoy security and to be autonomous, no, here is a. Situation that, um, where it's based on some of the stuff you picked off of the test.
And so it tells you your strengths and limitations. So my red strengths are I'm motivated, pragmatic, productive, proactive, decisive, assertive action oriented, determined a leader and focused. My blue strengths are that I'm quality oriented and deliberate. My white strengths are that I'm self-regulated and inventive.
And my yellow strength is that I'm a creative thinker. My red limitations are that I'm selfish tactless, always right. Bossy and demanding. My sisters would be like, yup. And my blue limitations or that I can be judgmental. Self-righteous a perfectionist worry prone, overly sensitive, low self-esteem and unrealistic expectations.
My white limitations can be that I'm can be an indirect communicator. And my yellow limitations are that I can be naive and obnoxious again, all of this fields, but these were all things I picked. So it's not like they wouldn't feel right to me. Now there's one little section here that I want to touch on before.
I end this and that is there's a section towards the end that tells you about development tasks to consider as. And then they've got them for work personal and love. And I'm going to look in on the personal, because that's kind of my focus for this next year is to help bring my personal life back into like focus in my entire life as a whole.
So I'm going to look at these ones and I'm going to see what I can take away from them. It says here, I need to start enjoying living in the most. Yes. Being more introspective in how you impact friends and family. That's something I've been working on for a long time. I'll be real with you. Inviting people who live life differently into your life.
That would be kind of hard for me, but yeah. Um, I need to stop making all the decisions about how your friends should live your bare life. That one I actually don't think I do, but it's mostly because I've been really kind of persona. Non existence in my friends lives in recent years, but I have done that before.
Uh, stop being so rigid about completing tasks on your days off Jesus. Yes. And stop getting mad at your family when they disrupt your focus. Aha. Yes. My kids will be like cheering in the background, um, and then continue juggling a variety of interests in your life, which you do so well. I appreciate you think that personality test, but I'm not really feeling that way right now.
Sharing your gifts of vision with the community and challenging the status quo. So, yeah, I'm down for that. I'm down to do some of those things. So what do I think about this test? Well, like I think that it's, I think that it's been fairly accurate, but I also don't know exactly how. How much insight it can give when there really was only probably about 50 questions total, and they all had to do with how you felt you were as a kid, which again, the further you are away from being a kid, it feels like the, the less you remember, but it was an interesting little thing.
And I guess it'll be really interesting when I get to the end of this series and I start comparing all of these results against each other. Well, anyway, it was a fun test take. I can imagine you want to get all this information, but it could be real interesting to look at by just doing the free version.
So I'll leave it linked in the show notes in case you want to take it and share your results with me over on Instagram, tag me at Lama letters and your stories. I'd also love any suggestions on personalities to take in the future personality tests. I've got a few of them on my list currently that I haven't done yet.
Um, Clifton strengths actually is the only one I have. At the moment. So I would love some more suggestions for personality type tests. They don't have to be scientific. They can be fucking bunk as shit. Maybe even a Buzzfeed test. I don't know. Let me know in the comments around the comments, this is a fucking podcast.
Let me know, uh, over on Instagram at Lama letters, or you can let me know, um, from my emails, whatever you want to do anyway, in the meantime, Thank my patrons. They make this episode possible. They make all my episodes possible and you can talk to them over at www.patreon.com/cindyguentertbaldo. In the meantime, my friends, I hope you have a fantastic rest of your week, and I cannot wait to talk to you next time.
Thanks and peace out.
| |||
| 24 Jan 2020 | Don't Be Beige | #97 | 00:05:08 | |
Are you letting the people around you determine who you are? What you do?
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Cindy Guentert-Baldo 4225 Solano Ave. #601 Napa, CA 94558
Inquiries - cindy@cindyguentertbaldo.com | |||
| 11 Oct 2021 | 131 | Shit I'm Excited About Fall '21 | 00:14:28 | |
I’m taking a spicy takes break (a poet!) and talking about some shit I am really looking forward to in the next few months. Movies, winter, etc. SO EXCITED!
Colorful words may be used. don't be alarmed.
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Inquiries - cindy@cindyguentertbaldo.com | |||
| 07 Feb 2020 | You Have The Same Amount Of Time As Oprah | #101 | 00:04:58 | |
Oh man, I have some feelings.
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Cindy Guentert-Baldo 4225 Solano Ave. #601 Napa, CA 94558
Inquiries - cindy@cindyguentertbaldo.com | |||
| 12 Aug 2019 | Why Don't We Use Our Planners When We NEED Them? | #71 | 00:31:31 | |
Why is it that when our lives go haywire, we push our planners to the side even though using our planners actually would HELP? Today I’m answering a question from Diane S - she asked me to talk about this as well as a more recent time I was actually successful planning my life out during a time of extreme busyness and stress. (NOTE - this is a repost due to technical difficulties. I apologize if you receive it twice)
This episode is sponsored by my Patrons. Learn more by checking out my Patron Page!
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Cindy Guentert-Baldo 4225 Solano Ave. #601 Napa, CA 94558
Inquiries - cindy@cindyguentertbaldo.com | |||
| 11 Nov 2019 | Never Have I Ever (with Planner Girl Chatter) | #83 | 00:39:21 | |
This week’s episode is a fun one - I got to record a joint podcast with Planner Girl Chatter at the West Coast Planners event in Portland in October, and we played a game of Never Have I Ever! Be sure to go check them out as well!
EMAIL NEWSLETTER FOR SHOP UPDATES! https://mailchi.mp/cindyguentertbaldo/podcast Preorder my book! https://amzn.to/2XIuqgg (affiliate link) West Coast Planners - https://www.facebook.com/groups/WestCoastPlanners/
Creativity For All - Simple Artistic Exercises In 10 Minutes Or Less - Get two months of Skillshare Premium free! https://www.skillshare.com/r/profile/Cindy-Guentert-Baldo/3618925
This episode is sponsored by my Patrons. Learn more by checking out my Patron Page!
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Cindy Guentert-Baldo 4225 Solano Ave. #601 Napa, CA 94558
Inquiries - cindy@cindyguentertbaldo.com | |||
| 24 Aug 2020 | It's Okay To Just Survive | #116 | 00:03:36 | |
Today is a quick little bit for you inspired by my friend Ann-Marie Harik (Rose Paper Party).
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Cindy Guentert-Baldo 4225 Solano Ave. #601 Napa, CA 94558
Inquiries - cindy@cindyguentertbaldo.com | |||
| 28 Oct 2019 | Loneliness | #81 | 00:25:09 | |
My friend and Patron Pamela asked me to talk about loneliness - she wanted to know if she was the only one who felt lonely all the time. Well, my friend, you’re not, and today we are chatting about being lonely, the difference between being lonely and being alone, and how chronic loneliness is actually a thing.
Creativity For All - Simple Artistic Exercises In 10 Minutes Or Less - https://skl.sh/2NhroIq Get two months of Skillshare Premium free! https://www.skillshare.com/r/profile/Cindy-Guentert-Baldo/3618925 This episode is sponsored by my Patrons. Learn more by checking out my Patron Page!
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Get my newsletter! https://mailchi.mp/cindyguentertbaldo/podcast Preorder my book! https://amzn.to/2XIuqgg (affiliate link) Cigna Article on Chronic Loneliness - https://www.cigna.com/individuals-families/health-wellness/chronic-loneliness
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Cindy Guentert-Baldo 4225 Solano Ave. #601 Napa, CA 94558
Inquiries - cindy@cindyguentertbaldo.com | |||
| 03 Jan 2020 | Track What You Want To Track | #91 | 00:03:35 | |
This is the first in what I hope will be a weekly Friday segment, 3 minutes or so in length, where I spit some hot truths at you based on whatever is on my mind this week. Today? I'm speaking out for the people who need to track mundane ass shit in their planners because they're building habits or need accountability (or any other reason).
CHECK OUT MY SHOP! https://www.etsy.com/shop/CGBPrints EMAIL NEWSLETTER FOR BOOK CLUB! https://mailchi.mp/cindyguentertbaldo/podcast Preorder my book! https://amzn.to/2XIuqgg (affiliate link) Book Club: Good Morning Good Life (affiliate link) - https://amzn.to/2LDZyWW Book Club: Good Morning Good Life Planner (affiliate link) - https://amzn.to/36xWKm9
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Cindy Guentert-Baldo 4225 Solano Ave. #601 Napa, CA 94558
Inquiries - cindy@cindyguentertbaldo.com | |||
| 10 Aug 2020 | COVID-19 & The Planner Community | #114 | 00:28:16 | |
Thanks to a question from Monica in the LLL Facebook group today I'll be discussing my thoughts on how COVID-19 is (and will be) impacting the planner community. I'll be looking both at the hobby of planning and the economy that has sprung up as a result.
Get two months of Skillshare Premium for free with this link (affiliate link) - https://www.skillshare.com/r/profile/Cindy-Guentert-Baldo/3618925
This episode is sponsored by my Patrons. Learn more by checking out my Patron Page!
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Cindy Guentert-Baldo 4225 Solano Ave. #601 Napa, CA 94558
Inquiries - cindy@cindyguentertbaldo.com | |||
| 09 Dec 2019 | I Suck At Saying No | #87 | 00:29:45 | |
The title says it all... I suck at saying no, and during the holidays it can get SO MUCH worse. Let's talk about it.
CHECK OUT MY SHOP! https://www.etsy.com/shop/CGBPrints EMAIL NEWSLETTER FOR SHOP UPDATES! https://mailchi.mp/cindyguentertbaldo/podcast Preorder my book! https://amzn.to/2XIuqgg (affiliate link)
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Gretchen Rubin4 Tendencies Article
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| 27 Dec 2021 | 142 | Let's Reframe How We See Goals In 2022 | 00:14:20 | |
Today I chat about how I am reapproaching my goals and my thought process for 2022.
Colorful words may be used. don't be alarmed.
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TRANSCRIPTIONWell, hi, everybody. Welcome back to the uncurated life podcast. It is one of my favorite times of year, the, uh, the new year, because even though the holidays and I have a very complicated relationship, the, the start of a new year is always exciting, both because I love paper planners and it's like the paper planner Olympics.
And also because it's just it's, it feels like a fresh start. Lots of birthdays in my family, everything else. So one of the things I do love to talk about this time of years is goal setting. And while I won't be going deep into my personal goals or my work goals on this podcast, if you'd like to see more about that, you can check out my YouTube channel.
Those videos will be coming out. They probably, most of them are out already at this point, by the time I'm recording this, I've still in the middle of setting them. So. Uh, let's just say that, uh, this is past Cindy telling future Cindy to get your shit together. The point is, if you want to see those check out my YouTube channel.
In the meantime though, one of the things I want to talk about is how I'm thinking about my goals this year, because I'm trying really hard to really reframe the way I am looking at them. And before. I get into it though. I also want to give you a reminder that if you have not joined my newsletter yet now is a great time because the first Monday in January, I will be putting out a little printable.
You can use to display your word of the year and I'm excited about it. So you can find the link for that in the description below yada yada, yada, et cetera, et cetera, et cetera, marketing, marketing, marketing. Let's get going on this. One of the things I'm doing this year is really rethinking my relationship with goal-setting because in some ways it was starting to feel a little rote and in some ways I think it was starting to feel a little less effective for me.
Part of it is because I think. Uh, there's a big theme in my life of setting better boundaries around my work and my personal life. And that includes with goal setting. So I'm separating them. Part of it is I think that my shit was starting to turn into a to-do list instead of really having like something that was meant to be fulfilling for me.
I just, I feel like I needed to sit and reassess not only the goals I would be setting for this next year. The reasons for, and the method behind why I'm doing it in the first place. And one of the things I wanted to do was talk through this with you here on the podcast, just in case you find any of it helpful.
That's kind of, one of the reasons I like making this podcast is by getting my thoughts out there because a lot of the times that's what this is. I'm sort of rambling my thoughts at you rather than. Giving you like some sort of like a curriculum or whatever. Sometimes it can be helpful. I know sometimes it's not, but in this case, I'm hoping that at least some of you get something out of this and I'm hoping I do too.
So if you're, like I said, if you're interested in the nuts and bolts of my goal setting for next year, the planners I'm using the process, et cetera, just check out my YouTube channel. You'll get all of that there because we are balls deep in 2022 prep over on my YouTube channel when it comes to goal setting.
The first thing that came to my mind when I was really trying to assess how and why and everything like that, the whole way this was going to go in this next year was why am I even bothering. Why am I doing this? What is it that I want out of these goals? Like what is the purpose? I have limited time.
And as I've said, multiple times, I'm having a lot of trouble setting boundaries around my time and deciding how I'm going to spend my time. And so if I'm going to devote a large amount of my time to setting some goals now, What is the purpose of it? Why do I want to do it? Am I doing it because I think I have to, am I doing it for the gram?
Am I approaching all of my goals in the same way? Or should I reassess how I'm looking at them and how some of them might be different from. Others like, and some of this may be obvious to you, but to me, it, actually, I had to sit and really think about this for a few minutes, because like I said, sometimes it feels a little wrote to me and I noticed, and I think I mentioned this in a recent power sheets video, but like even when it came to setting my goals and trying to separate work and personal goals, My personal goals did not go very well unless they had some aspect of them connected to my work.
So it seems like trying to do things for myself, have really just been pushed to the side. So if I want to do this and I could tell that I really want to, because I want to reclaim some of my personal energy back and my personal time back. And I guess that is why. But how do I do that in a way where I can respect the time I need for the different aspects of my life.
So I need to improve upon this is basically what I'm coming out of this with, because I came out of this, knowing that I really want. To both progress in my, my work life, progressing my career progress in the income I bring in progress in the skills that I acquire progress in the, both the depth and the breadth of the things that I do freelance wise.
Expand my community, all those things for work, but that I also want to restore some sort of harmony in my personal life, knowing that I have health issues and that I have kids with mental and physical health issues, knowing that there's a lot going on and that my time and my strength and my energy are so limited, but being able to bring some more of that peace and some more of that.
Into my personal life without exhausting myself. That's a very tricky balance to find, but it's an, and I'm definitely going to want to strive towards this next year. And I think in order to do that, when I set sort of the foundation of it by goal setting, I need to be extremely clear that I want both of these things, but that in order for them both to happen, there needs to be some give and take.
No, I love me some woo woo. As much as I hate to admit it, like I may just about it. I may joke about the woo, but I also have a certain level of the Wu that I, I enjoy. Right. But what I have discovered in this last year, especially in the last like chunk of the year, and I've talked about this in multiple goals, videos is that.
I, I tend to lean too far into the Wu when it comes to work goal setting, it makes it real easy for me to set some squishy touchy-feely goals when it comes to work setting. When goal setting, when what I also really need to do is be thinking about revenue goals to be thinking about like KPIs. I don't even know what KPI stands for.
I just know that it's like the thing that my husband talks about with like, these are the things. You measure when you're seeing how your performances, so that kind of shit, as much as I don't tend to think that way in order for me to progress as someone who is working as a freelancer and bringing in multiple streams of revenue from different aspects of being self-employed, I need to really.
I need to like step aside from some of the woo, keep some of the woo cause that's who I am, but also bring in some of the more concrete, analytical shit. And that's, that's something I really need to focus on in this next year.
It's important to me when I say, why am I setting goals when it comes to work that I need to both. Have concrete things to work towards with measurable results to prove the value of what I'm doing to myself. So I can make some steps, but I also need to still continue to work with my gut and go with my intuition and what feels right.
Because that's what I've done thus far. And I, I really, that's a big part of who I am. So. Work-wise I think I'm kind of moving in that direction, but with home stuff, I need to be in the opposite direction. I feel like all I've been doing for personal life goals saying is just making a to-do list and calling them goals.
I because of that, it feels just like, it's just another thing I need to check off my list. And what I really think I need to do is hone in on the areas of my life that need more attention, more fulfillment, and think about ways to elevate that and elevate those areas of my life rather than worrying so much about checking all this shit off of a list.
So it's almost like I need to go in complete opposite directions with both my work and my personal. And really, really, uh, really hone in on that. So I kind of sat down to think about like, okay, well, if I've kind of come up with sort of the overall picture of how I need to reassess my goals for this next year, How do I, how do I really, how do I really work my way through to decide what planner to use, how to decide, how to set my goals and all of those other things.
And I, I kind of came back to the old grammar, the old grammar situation from elementary school, right? The who, what, when, where that situation. So think about it this way. If you're thinking about your goals and this is the thing I'm going to be doing, what am I working towards? What am I working towards and why is it important?
And once you answer those questions, then you could say, well, how am I going to get there? When, once you know how you're going to get there, you start coming up with ideas of how then when are you going to work on those things? Where are you going to fit them into your life? And then where are you tracking them?
It seems super simple. But I swear as a planner person and I can't speak for any of you, but if you agree with me, make sure to post this in your stories and tag me at Lama letters so I can see it and respond to it. But as a planner person, I think the first thing I think about is where I'm going to be tracking all of those things.
That's the question? What planner am I Kenny's where am I going to be working on tracking these things instead of. The other way around in reality, the, where you're going to be tracking things probably should come last because it's not the place you're tracking them in. That's the most important, it's why you're doing it in the first place and why it's important to you.
That's the big thing I'm struggling with right now. And I'm kind of working my way through. I will also add the final kind of aspect to all of this when it comes to reassessing. How I kind of work on my goals is that I really don't like the phrasing work on my goals. I don't like the idea of, well, I need to set aside time to work on my goals because what I think.
Is going to be important to me in this next year, especially personal goals wise. My S my non-work-related stuff is that it needs to be holistic. There's the woo in my life. It needs to be part of my life. I don't want to just set aside time to work on my goals. I want it to be integrated into the time I spend every day that it's not a question of like blocking off time to work on my goals every day, but that it just becomes part of my daily life.
I don't know how that's going to work. I don't know if that's possible, but the idea of like quote, working on my goals has really led me to that path of a to-do list of things I want to check off. Whereas I would really like to see it more as how do I take these things? I say I want and really integrate them and elevate them in my life as a whole so that they just feel natural and part of my life, as opposed to something I'm trying to shoe horn.
Again, this may not be how it is for you, but for me this whole, this whole goal setting as to-do list situation is not. In my personal life for work, it actually has been helping me using a Kanban board to track projects to get me towards those measurable goals has really helped me solidify the way I am working.
And I am excited and I should have a review already up of the system, which has helped me with that for work. And I'm going to continue to use it in the next year, but like personal goals wise, it turns my life into a series of, to do's on a list that need to be checked out. And I need it to be more than that.
I need it to have a higher purpose than that. Doesn't have to be a fancy, like religious, higher purpose, but it needs to be, I keep coming back to the word elevate, but that's kind of what it feels like. So that is how I am reassessing and reframing goals as a concept for 2020. I hope that this might've helped you a little bit.
I'm still a little confused by all the things I just said, but it's really something that is it's important to me this next year, because as I feel crappier and descend further into kidney failure, it's just a reminder that like our time is so limited. It's so finite and spending all of my time trying to be productive or trying to accomplish things.
It doesn't bring me joy the way that just feeling like my life has purpose does. And it's a, it's a subtle shift for me, but I think it's one that might serve me well in the next year. And it's something I hope to bring you along for the ride width. Now I mentioned at the beginning of this episode, that if you sign up for my newsletter, you're going to get a printable for.
To be able to print out and put your word of the year on it. However, if you are a patron, I'm going to be doing my annual word of the year lettering session in January. So if you are interested again, a principle, a PNG file that you can use to actually print out a hand lettered version of your word of the year.
Check out my page. www.patreon.com/cindyguentertbaldo. It's all linked in the description. My patrons are also the sponsors of all of my podcast episodes, and they're fucking amazing. And I cannot wait to hang out with them more in the upcoming year. Anyway, I hope that this was helpful for you. Please let me know if it was, and until next time, my friends peace out. | |||
| 14 Mar 2022 | WHAT'S MY CHRONOTYPE | 153 | 00:15:22 | |
It's time for another personality test podcast. And this one is fun because it also is going to tell me what time I should be doing things. Hi everybody. I'm Cindy Guentert-Baldo. Welcome back to the uncurated life podcast, where we talk about life, both on and off the internet. And this is an episode in an ongoing series. I'm doing that. Really titled anything but loosely known to me, at least as personality tests, test for a cynic when it comes to personality tests. And this week I am talking about the chronotype test. Now there's apparently a chronotype test that has been used for years. Uh, called the morning eveningness questionnaire, but it has been expanded by a doctor named Michael J. Bruce, who has expanded it into four. Chronotypes used to be three, but he expanded into four. Now this has to do with like your sleep and wake preferences. And when the best times are for you to do certain things, when your energy is highest and lowest and blah, blah, blah, he's written a book called the power of when I have it. Maybe I will, maybe I won't, I don't know yet, but the book is all about discovering what your chronotype is and then making sure that you do your best to work along the lines of your internal clock. Now, I recognize that something like this in and of itself is inherently privileged because not everybody. Choose to work at jobs or in careers that respect your internal clock. You know, I don't know what my internal clock is yet. I haven't taken the quiz yet, but I used to have to work at 4:00 AM. When I worked at a grocery store, when I was in the bakery, I'd have to go in at 3:00 AM and that was not necessarily something I use, but it got to pay the bills. I get that. I just wanted to preface it with that mainly because when I talk about being able to. Alter how I do my work or when I could do my best work, I work for myself. And so that is both a blessing and a curse, but the blessing of it is that I'll be able to adapt based on whatever information I get from this shit. Should I choose to? But the curse is that because I can adapt. It means I also sometimes adapt my way into doing nothing for a while and then I don't get paid. I just, I wanted to add the context there. Anyway, let's get. This Dr. Bruce Bruce Wayne situation here. So the tagline, one of the taglines for the novels is, or the book is to learn the best time to do everything from drinking your coffee to have sex or go for a run, according to your body's chronotype. Okay. Well, one out of three ain't bad, right? Anyway. So I'm going to read to you about the chronotypes that he talked about in an article for psychology today, uh, so that we can understand which one is which, and then I will take the test and then we will come back and talk about it. He based the types on mammals, I guess, birds, I think I could be wrong about this, but I think the idea of like, um, an evening, a night owl or a morning Lark or whatever those ideas are from the original Kronos. Framework. He has framed them around mammals because as humans we are. We got the boobies. Anyway, the first one is lions. Lions are morning hunters and people who are the lion chronotype are the early risers of the world. Lions are optimistic, naturally disciplined, including about their sleep routines, practical and goal oriented. They're generally good sleepers with a medium sleep drive. It's rare to find a lion who struggles to stick to a regular early bedtime. Lions have a natural tendency for routine and moderation in their daily habits. And this shows in their overall health picture studies show that morning types of early bedtimes have a lower risk for cardiovascular disease, less obesity, and may have lower risks for mental health disorders, including depression, anxiety, and others lions leap into their days full of energy the morning and early afternoon, or when lions are at their most productive. Aside from that. I, I don't, I don't anticipate that I'm Elian. He also adds that about 15 to 20% of the general adult population are lions. The second chronotype is bears. Bears are all day hunters and bear chronotypes are go with the flow types with middle of the road, sleep wake preferences of the four chronotypes bears adhere most closely to a solar schedule. Bears are most alert and productive during the middle of the day. From late morning through early afternoon, bears are easygoing and social fun-loving team players. They have a high sleep drive and tend to sleep deeply, but many bears carry a sleep debt. They don't get enough sleep to meet their needs. Bears are prone to inconsistency in their sleep routines. They often under sleep during the workweek and sleep extra on the weekend to make up for their insufficient rest inconsistent sleep habits can put the bare circadian Nicholas. Chronically out of sync, social jet lag has been linked to higher BMI and greater risk for obesity exists. Weight is a common challenge among bears who tend to carry weight, particularly around their midsection. Their vulnerability to social jet lag is one highly likely factor bears are the most common chronotype. About 50% of the adult population are bears because it is the most common chronotype bear time has. Influence over our social time. Six o'clock is the standard dinner hour because that's when bears are ready for their evening meal. Remember settling in to watch your favorite TV show at 10:00 PM. That's when bears are ready to lay low, but aren't quite prepared to fall asleep. And the majority of bear chronotypes modern society as long adopted bear time is the norm in large part. All the other chronotypes live on bear time. When it comes to daily social schedules for schoolwork and social. I will say just from all of that, I think I'm a bear. I'm just going to say right now, bear is the front runner. Uh, the third one is wolves. Wolves are nighttime hunters and the Wolf chronotype has a strong preference for evenings wolves are the people who drag themselves out of bed before 9:00 AM. And don't start really feeling tired until midnight or so. Wolves are creative, impulsive, and emotionally intense. They love to seek out new experiences and are natural brisk takers wolves have a medium sleep drive with peaks of productivity in the late morning. And again, Evening, because if their strong preference for evening hours, wolves often struggle with living. According to the schedule society demands of them. Things like work in school, get going too early and social fund ends too soon. What was, they're highly vulnerable to chronic social jet lag and insufficient sleep. And that can have consequences for their mental and physical help. Health research shows. Evening credit types are at greater risk for. Diseases wolves typically perform at their best with a run seven hours of sleep. Getting that much sleep can be tough for wolves because their biological rhythm is so at odds with society's timetable for daily life, about 20 to 15 to 20% of the population are wolves. Yeah. It's not me. And then dolphins. Dolphins of the mammalian world, our uni hem, what the fuck dude, can I even read this uni hemispheric sleepers? That means they sleep with one half of their brain at a time with the other half awake and active. That is a pitch perfect analogy. The fourth chronotype of restless light sleepers, as I've said, dolphins are wired and tired types. Chronically tired during the day. And wired with restless nervous energy at night, dolphins are light and restless sleepers with a low sleep drive who tend to wake frequently during the night, their minds are active in the evening with often racing thoughts and they feel physically keyed up. There are biological reasons for dolphins, nighttime, restlessness, and agitation. It turns out that dolphins have a circadian biology that's turned upside down. In contrast to other chronotypes dolphins, brain activity increases at night in areas of the brain that promote alertness and unlike other chronotypes dolphins, blood pressure and cortisol levels rise in the evening, which leaves them in a state of physiological arousal at bedtime. Come morning when the other chronotypes are experiencing elevations to blood pressure and cortisol that are fueling their morning, alertness, dolphin levels are playing. Personality wise, they're highly intelligent, cautious detail oriented. Perfectionism is a common dolphin trait and often anxious, as I've said, about 10% of the population are dolphins. I don't think I'm a dolphin, but I do resonate with some of that. I tend to not be able to turn my mind off at night and that will lead me to not being able to fall asleep for hours. If I can turn my mind off, I can fall asleep. But if I can't, if I get going on anything, that's the cause of a lot of my like, slow to sleep until. Anyway, I'm super interested in this now. So I'm going to take the quiz. It is@thepowerofwhenquiz.com. Everything will be linked in the show notes, and if it costs anything to get your big info at the end, I'll be sure to let you know, I'm going to take a pause here and I will be back in just a second with my results. Okay, so I'm done. And like I thought I am indeed a bear. I was actually talking to Jesse about it when he popped in here to ask me if I wanted lunch. And I was like, what do you think you are? He thinks he might be a dolphin, which actually would track with a lot of things, but moving forward. So when I, the, the quiz itself, uh, was just a series of questions. It's just, you drop your it's multiple choice type questions, and then you give them your email and they send you your results. Allegedly, I haven't actually gotten my results. There it is. They just showed up. This has been like 15 minutes since, um, since that's the case, now it does say he's going to be sending me a series of emails to tell me all about being a bear. So I'm unsubscribing because I don't want all of those emails and a. But it's just some interesting information about being a bear. I guess I'm kind of interested in reading the book. I'll be real with you. That's not always the case with these personality tests, but I am curious, but I was like, okay, wait, this is not giving me what I want. Like he's giving me all this info allegedly about being a bear. But what I really want is to know, well, if I'm a bear, what am I supposed to drink coffee and have sex and run. So I. Bear chronotype. And I came to an article on the website, bright side.me that has hell ads on it before warned, but it also has the perfect daily schedule that corresponds to your chronotypes. So we're gonna go to the bear. And it says here on there, little infographic that bears are 50 to 55% of all people. They sleep a lot, but don't get enough sleep, lack of energy after lunch and on weekends, they try to recoup the sleep that that's basically me. I will be real. That is basically me. So here we go. They, uh, Ooh, the main rule bears shouldn't sleep more than eight hours. Even during the weekends. I wonder if being chronically ill with kidney disease is changes that because I swear sometimes my body just needs sleep. It feels like regardless. Let's look at the daily schedule for bears morning from 7:00 AM to 11. Wake up and exercise from eight for eight to 10 minutes, eat a hearty breakfast and drink coffee. It'll help to not overeat in the evening. And the excess calories will give you the necessary energy for the whole day plan your day. Maximum productivity from 11:00 AM to 6:00 PM. Do things that demand a lot of energy and concentration. First you'll complete them faster. You'll get tired as lunchtime approaches. That's why it's better to go out for a walk, bright colors, and the sun will wake your organism up and will help fight drowsiness have lunch at 12. It'll give you energy for the rest of the day. By two, you may start feeling tired again. So arrange meetings and coffee breaks to help you get through the afternoon. After work from six to 10 is the best time for a workout. It's hard to start, but only at the beginning have a light dinner after exercising, more protein, fewer carbs. And the end of the day from 10 to 11 bears can stay up late, but they always feel tired in the morning. You better turn off your gadgets at 10 and go to bed. The funny thing is looking at this schedule. A lot of that's already what I'm doing, kind of, I usually try to wake up around six 30 because I get my kids if it's seven for school and it gives me time to take a shower before they get up, or at the very least have coffee before they get up. I don't usually eat breakfast because my stomach is really upset in the mornings, but I've been thinking that it might make me feel better if I eat something once my stomach has mellowed out. The daytime schedule is very similar to what I liked in an ideal day is what I would do. Eat lunch at noon. Take a walk to like wake myself up, schedule things in the later half of the day. Like that's what I try to do anyway, but it's something to keep in mind. I actually have found myself when I do ride the Peloton. It tends to happen more frequently in the evenings, usually after dinner around eight o'clock. That's just what it seems to work the best for me the end of the day is just shoot. Right anyway. So the idea here is, is this schedule actually feels very. Reasonable to me, I should look at a different one and see if they feel a little bit less reasonable, but this bear schedule, I'm looking at it and thinking Yeah. So we'll look at the lions. The morning, people waking up at five 30 drinking coffee around 10 end of the day. Go to bed at 10. And then for the wolves, wake up, set two alarms, 20 minutes apart, postpone all your main test to one PMC that would never work for me because I feel like a lot of my creative work gets done between like 10 and 12 and then dolphins, very neurotic, restless sleep loved to spend time on the internet till late at night. Oh my God. I need to send this to Jesse. I'm pretty sure it's him. Cause it says it's better to start your day with a morning and running some exercise. I've been telling him he needs to do this for years now. Holy shit. Anyway, I think this out of all of the personality tests that I've taken has been the one that I'm most amused by partly because I have been so stressed out about sleep anyway, because you know, being a kidney failure exhausted. These schedules are actually like, kind of give, throwing me for a loop. I may just read this book. I don't know. So I would love to hear from you in the comments or in the comments. This is not a YouTube video, but on the podcast we go to the Instagram and the stories and you tag me at @llamaletters and you tell me what you think I'd love to know what your chronotype is. And do you actually like subscribe to any of this? Does it work for you? Thank you so much for listening. Thank my patrons. They're the ones who, uh, subs who sponsored these episodes. You can find out more at www.patreon.com/cindyguentertbaldo. And until next time I hope you get some sleep. I hope you take care of yourself and peace out. | |||
| 24 Jan 2022 | DARE | 146 | 00:10:02 | |
If you were a kid in the 80s or 90s chances are you’ve got some memories of the DARE program… and those memories might not be the best. Today I’m chatting about my experience with the DARE program, the changes they’ve made in recent years, and more.
Colorful words may be used. don't be alarmed.
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TRANSCRIPTIONHey, everybody. Welcome back to the uncurated life podcast. Today is going to be kind of a shorter episode. Originally. I was going to do a deep dive, but I realized I don't really want to do a deep dive on this subject. What I would rather do is kind of tell you my experience. And then hear back from you, some of your experiences, and then perhaps I will do a follow-up episode sharing some of those experiences.
And the subject I'm talking about is the dare program. Now, if you grew up in the eighties, the nineties, you went to elementary school in those times in the United States, chances are, you have had experience with the dare program. So, what is it? Well from the Wikipedia, you know, the most solid source of information.
Dare program materials from 1991. Describe it as a drug abuse prevention education program, designed to equip elementary school children with skills for resisting peer pressure to experiment with tobacco, drugs, and alcohol. It was created as a part of the war on drugs in the United States with the intention of reducing the demand for drugs through education that would make drug use unappealing.
The program was conducted by uniformed police officers who visited classes. And so my memory of dare is exactly that, uh, uniform police officers coming into my elementary school classroom to scare the shit out of us when it came to drugs, tobacco, alcohol, et cetera. Now, aside from the fact that the war on drugs is based in some extreme bullshit, which can be an entire other podcast series on its own.
And I'm sure there is some. Th the concept of police officers coming into classrooms to scare the shit out of kids to, uh, not use drugs, not only was it scary, it also didn't work. Like one of the things that was seen with dare that I noticed in my research was that often it would go up with kids later.
Anyway. I had been thinking about doing an episode on the dare program for a while now. And then the other day I was walking to Ulta or something to pick up an order. And there were some people out there at a table, soliciting donations for dare, and they came up to me and they're like, hi, would you like to donate to dare?
And I'm like, dare. And she's like, the look on her face was like, oh God, not again. Like the, these were younger people. These people could have. More than like early twenties, but they were like, oh God, not another person who had a bad experience with dare, but she was like, no, no, no, no, no, no, it's better now.
It's different. And I'm like, ah, I'm going to pass anyone I kept going. Right. But it made me curious as to this new revamped version of dare. So looking online. I found this quote that said it's not an anti-drug program, says Michelle Miller day co-developer of the new curriculum and a communications researcher at Chapman university.
It's about things like being honest and safe and responsible. Even so keeping it real, which is the new name of dare has reduced substance abuse and maintained anti-drug attitudes over time among students in early trials and achievement that largely alluded the former iteration of the program. So maybe it's getting better.
I don't know, suffice it to say that when I mentioned a dare on live stream, relatively recently, a bunch of you popped in with your own experiences with dare. So, what I would love is for I'm going to, I'm going to give you my quick experience as to what happened with me with dare, and then I'm gonna end this.
It's going to be, like I said, a very short episode, but what I'm calling to you, your call to action. If you will, is to let me know, you can email me Cindy at Cindy Gunter, baldo.com, or you can message me or post to Instagram stories at Lama letters. You can. Let me know in the comments of any video that you want to just use hashtag dare podcast.
So I can find it, but let me know your experiences with dare and whether or not you're comfortable with me sharing them in an upcoming episode to talk about like how dare has impacted a lot of us, anecdotally speaking, just let me know. You'll find links and shit in the description box or the fucking show notes.
The thing the podcasts have. Without further ado. My tale of dare. I was a very neurotic kid that shouldn't surprise anybody, but I was very neurotic when I was kid my parents. And I can talk about them all I want to, because they're both dead. Now. My parents were super into smoking pot. They also tried other drugs as well, but pot was their main kind of situation.
And when I was a kid, I didn't really recognize what they were doing for the longest time. I knew they were smoking. I didn't know what they were smoking. I maybe I assumed it was tobacco. My grandpa smoked pipe out of a tobacco and my dad smoked cigarettes. So maybe it made sense that like the joints in the pipes, they were smoking out of what was tobacco, you know?
Cause I was also clueless, but the point is. It's when I was in fifth graders. So the dare officers came to my elementary school and they told us about how, if you smoke pot, you're going to go to jail. Like kids get separated from their parents. It was, I don't remember exactly what they said and I could be over-exaggerating this in my mind, but the impression that it left on a very neurotic fifth grader who had recently discovered that while her parents were smoking was actually.
I was terrified. I went home, I cried myself to sleep. I was horrified that my parents were going to get taken away from me because they smoked pot. I thought there was no way I was going to be able to talk them out of it because they liked doing it. So the only thing I could do is take matters into my own hands.
So I poured bleach on their pot pled. I never told them it was me. My mom found out it was me years later when certain ex husbands of mine told her. But. Uh, I poured bleach and killed their pot plant. And for the rest of my school career, up until up like way up until I was too terrified of alcohol, of, of pot, of everything to even think about going near any of them.
Now you might say, well, Cindy, isn't that the point of dare to help people resist peer pressure. It wasn't about resisting peer pressure. It was about being terrified that I was going to get sent a fucking prison over it. And knowing what I know now, not only about marijuana, but knowing what I know now about alcohol, about cigarettes, about addictive substances substances in general, like that's some fucking bullshit, like somebody shouldn't get sent to jail for using pot, like of all goddamn things.
So to have a utterly terrified kid, Who had no real reason to be that terrified. Like I wasn't going to go and like smoke pot to begin with. I wasn't interested in it. Like I never was. Even when I found out my parents smoked it, it wasn't like, oh my God, my parents smoked pot. It must be so cool. No, no, no, no.
My parents smoked pot. That's the least cool thing I've ever heard of. That's how you keep your kid from smoking pot in high school is to have your parents do it that way. They're like you that's what old people do. It's like Facebook, right? I'm not condoning any parenting decisions here. I'm just joking.
But like the idea here is that what dare did was leave a strong enough impression on me about how scary. The police would be if ever I or someone I love was caught smoking pot, I don't think is the impression they were going for, but I'm fairly certain that that's the impression. A lot of people, I knew hat and looking back on it.
And now thinking about the new dare, the keeping it real people asking for donations. All I can think about is fucking no, even if you've improved the program, even if you have improved the program, the roots in the program are in the racist war on drugs to begin with. And secondly, like I have real like, issues that came from that.
Like they took something with no thought, no talking, they developed it with police officers. They didn't develop it with psychologists. They didn't develop it with anybody like that. They left some, a real, like amount of scarring on me when it came to how I approach the world for a long time. And while the net result of that was me not smoking pot, like the result of me being fucking terrified and paranoid and like afraid of police officers afraid of what was gonna happen to my parents.
Like that sucks, dude. It sucks. And I do not endorse. So now that you've heard my, my history with the dare program and how I feel about it. I would love to know from you in the comments or not in the comments, but like, like I said, you can email me, you can message me if you're patron, you can let me know on Patrion on the, um, the sneak preview of this post, your experiences with the dare program, how you feel about it, how it made you feel about drugs, about police officers, whatever the case may be.
And then let me know if you're okay with me sharing this later and I will compile them and we will revisit dare with some more research and so on. And so. In an upcoming month in the upcoming months because I'm right now, I'm too fired up to really do a lot of research. But I really want to tell you how dare made me feel, because to this day, if you can't tell, I'm still resentful of it and I'm fucking almost 42.
So. That should tell you a lot. Anyway, thanks again to my patrons for sponsoring this episode. I don't think, I think that first of all, in this episode, but they, they deserve my thanks. They do, because they're awesome. They make these episodes possible and you should thank them too. And if you're interested in becoming one, check out www.patreon.com/cindyguentertbaldo to find out more my friends, whether you were traumatized by dare or not as a kid, I hope you have a fantastic day.
I'd love to hear from you. So be sure to let me know your thoughts and until next time, peace. | |||
| 29 Nov 2021 | 138 | What I'm Thankful For | 00:22:25 | |
This year has been a really intense, rough one… but there has been a lot that I have been grateful for as well, and I’m reflecting on it!
Colorful words may be used. don't be alarmed.
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TRANSCRIPTIONHi there everybody. Welcome back to the uncurated life podcast. I have been kind of cranky lately fuels into my bad art friend podcasts. You probably got a good like heaping helping of that, but in general, I've been a little cranky. And I think that a big part of that is. Just being stressed from all sorts of things going on in my life.
And a big part of that is my usual ambivalence towards the holidays, even though it has been so great having family here and our new puppy and everything else, but like, I tend to be very ambivalent at best towards the holidays because of all of my fucking unresolved and unrelenting grief about both my parents passing away when I was in my twenties.
Not feeling great about the holidays when my kids were small, because my marriage was not in a good place, et cetera, et cetera. I'm also really grateful for so many things right now. And I thought it would be appropriate as it is the end of November to talk a little bit about them. Not because I think that, you know, you need to go through a day feeling super grateful.
I was hate watching some Rachel. Stuff like recent stuff. And she said that it is impossible to be anxious or depressed if you're feeling grateful. And I'm like says fucking who, Dr. Hollis. So there is that. I'm not going to tell you that a gratitude practice is going to make you feel like a million bucks and that you can manifest your fucking best Elon Musk lifestyle or whatever.
I'm not saying that. But it is nice sometimes to reflect on those things, especially if you're feeling them, but they're being kind of drowned out by like the grumpiness or the whateverness to just bring them to the surface and hold them in your hand, like a pretty rock or something you found when you're walking on the beach and just like, look at it and let it be for a second.
And then you can set it down. But you'll have that memory and that feeling in you. So even if it doesn't magically cure you like some Dr. Hollis's might say at the very least, it'll brighten your day a little bit. And that's what I want to do right now. But before I get into that, because marketing is a thing I wanted to let you know, if you hadn't figured it out already that my series two of my fuckery flowers, which are my flagship art print that I sell on at sea, they are beautiful botanicals flowers.
I've got some herbs in this newest series of 12. Um, they're beautiful mixed media paintings that I create prints out of that have naughty words hidden in them. And the latest series a is not going anywhere. However, the shop is not going to be open for. Uh, much longer. It'll be open for another couple of weeks.
I believe I'm going to close it maybe the second week of December, because of the way that shipping is going right now, the slow downs and everything else. I just want to make sure you're not going to order anything and want it there by a certain timeframe. And then have that get all fucked because of shipping.
So my best way to control that is to just shut the shop down till the end of the year. But my goal is to reopen it. But if you would like to get your hands on those prints along with anything else that's in there. Before then I would just suggest you check it out and you can find all of that information in the show notes.
Now that I've said all of that, I would like to reflect I've done this before. This is not the first time I've done an episode like this. I would just like to reflect on some things that I'm grateful for. And maybe by listening to me talk about those things, it will help you reflect on some things you might be grateful for.
Maybe save this episode for a day when you're feeling extra fucking grumpy, but you want to listen to something that will help you maybe think through some of those things to just help ease a little bit of that, even if it doesn't change it. Now, of course, if you're really grumpy, sometimes I am and I listened to an episode like this.
I'd be like, fuck you, Cindy. I trust that you know yourself and that you would know the best time for something like this. So let's get into it. What am I grateful for? One thing I'm grateful for, which is probably one of the most complicated things that I'm grateful for is having my kids with me basically.
Full-time this is. Amazing for me. I have not had my kids with me full time. For the most part, since RJ was three and Kat was five when Russell and I split up and I've had them with me full time since August, because they moved to Denver with us. Now, the reason this is complicated is that I am divorced and I share custody of them.
And up until we moved to Denver because of Jesse's job, the kids had a 50, 50 custody split with their dad. And by. Doing this by making this move, we gave the kids the choice of where they wanted to be. Full-time because it was important that they have agency. They're both teenagers. Kat actually turns 18 at the end of December.
Holy shit. And RJ is 15, be 16 in March. And so they really do have agency in this and they wanted to come with us. And so they spend most of their summer with their dad and, um, their breaks, like fall break, winter break, spring break with their dad. So it's complicated because I am so happy to have them with me full time for a number of reasons, a because they're with me full time, it's easier to see certain things that were going under the radar when they were doing the 50 50 custody, because the vibe at each house was so different, which is now it's natural, right.
Two different households, but the kids would adapt to that. And because of that, There were certain ongoing problems, especially with one of my kids, both physically and mentally that were harder to gauge because you didn't have the context of them. Full-time and you had to depend on them reporting to you.
And as I'm sure many of, you know, especially those of you who struggle with mental health things, I struggle with mental health things that I can tell you flat out that self reporting is not accurate. But the, sometimes it's the best you have to go with. But when you have somebody with you full time, not only do you have their self-reporting, but you have your own observation, which is much more consistent.
And then on top of that, then you also don't have the transitions happening so often. So things kind of stay a little bit more mellow on the home front. So it really allows you to see what's happening. And that has been extremely helpful in so many ways. So there's that. And I mean, there's also just like the joy of having them here full time, but I recognize that while I'm grateful for that, it comes at a cost.
It comes at the cost of my ex-husband knocking to spend anywhere near as much time with them, which I can't even imagine if I was in the same situation. And on top of that, my kids don't get to see their dad as often. And that's an entirely different thing and they moved, they moved from Napa to Denver, like.
Another big cost as part of that, like Jesse and I had to make the move because of his job, but they didn't have to do that. And they did. And I'm grateful that they did, but I recognize that the gratefulness comes with a price. And so that is very much something that I have been reflecting on this year.
It's it's, bittersweets not even the right word. Complicated is basically kind of where I'm feeling with. Another thing that is a complicated feeling is low-key my cat, who we had to put down at the end of September, was at the end of September. It was in the fall, like, which we're still in, but like we had to put low-key down.
He had terminal. Failure. We think it was cancer, but it came on quickly enough. And it was so devastating to a system that even if it was cancer, there was nothing we could do. Like his kidneys were destroyed. So we couldn't fix that. Even if we stopped whatever it was, he still wouldn't have any kidney function.
I'm so grateful for the time that we had with him, because not only was he the sweetest leukemia, but on top of that, if it wasn't for me having him and. Realizing that my anti pet stance was outdated. We wouldn't have Lou who is our other cat who's two and is an absolute little wackadoo, but I fucking adore him.
And we wouldn't have gotten our new puppy, Layla, who is an absolute sweetie. So I'm grateful for our time with him, but again, it's complicated, both because I'm sad and I miss him, but also having and watching your cat fail that quickly with kidney problems and seeing his decline and seeing what it went through as somebody who also had.
Kidney failure. Like I am in chronic kidney disease. I cannot my kidney disease. There is no healing from it. I will not get better from it. A transplant will help as a treatment, but it will bring its own set of situations. And my diseases, genetic, I will never be better. I will never be better. And so seeing my cat go through kids like Jessie, Was struggling sometimes with how I was reacting to him dying, like being in that place before we put him down.
And I realized it was like, this I'm really close to this. Like I'm not a cat, but I'm in kidney failure myself. And so seeing his decline and seeing a once vibrant kitty, like really, really go downhill fast as somebody with kidney failure that really sucked. On, like, not just the, I love my kitty, but oh my God.
I also am sick kind of a situation. So like I said, I'm so grateful for the time we had together, but like the first point I made very complicated and I will say. On a very uncomplicated note. I am so grateful for our new house. I love our new house. I love how much space there is and that we can have family here.
And it gives me more time to enjoy them before I start losing my shit, because I have house guests. I love that there's room for my cat and my puppy to have space from each other, for my kids to have space from us. And yet still the arrangement of the house makes it so that we have places like the kitchen and the family room where like we can.
Come together as a family and not feel so lonely. I love having my nice big office. I love having our beautiful backyard. I love our neighborhood. It's another thing I'm grateful for our fucking neighbors. Our rad, I had that later on my list, but it just basically came in. We have rat ass neighbors. We love our neighborhood.
We love our location, very close to like a target and a Costco and an awesome Asian supermarket and just all sorts of things. I'm very, very grateful for it. And some of the things that have happened, like low-key passing away and some of the things we're going through with the kids right now, a little bit of that is mitigated by being in such a peaceful and beautiful and comforting new setting.
I had to take a pause for a second and put the lotion on my skin or else I get the hose again, because my knuckles are so dry. One thing that comes from the relocation is the desert atmosphere of Denver and goddammit. If my knuckles are not just raw. And so I'm also grateful, unplanned, grateful for trader Joe's moisturizing, hand cream, not sponsored.
I'm very grateful for the new transplant center being close to our house. So I dunno, I think I've said this in a few places, but for context, when Jesse and I shopped for a house in the burbs of Denver, we had some specific. Things we were looking for, like there was a school district we wanted to be a part of and distance from Jesse's potential new office and just various things like that, as well as like the aspects of the actual house we were looking for, there were like needs and wants that we had there.
But another thing that we put into our search that our realtor put into our search for us was that we wanted it to be within half an hour driving to. Of the new transplant center. And the reason for this is because when you get a kidney transplant, you have to make a bunch of appointments to the transplant center in the pre-transplant timeframe, like the workups and everything like that.
But then once you get the transplant for. You're in the hospital for several days. My sister was in the ICU for like five days. And the reason she was in the ICU is because they have to keep an eye on you to make sure that you're getting the right levels of immunosuppressant so that you don't reject the new organ.
And because you have something foreign in your body, your body's starting to produce an immune response, which they need to take care of, blah, blah, blah. So it's nice. And I know this from experience because we stayed in a condo five minutes from the hospital. When my sister got her transplant, it is very nice to be close enough to the hospital, to be able to go back to the house and take a shower and like have some lunch or whatever, and then go back and see someone.
So there's that. But then on top of that, a, when you have a transplant, you need to stay within. An hour of the center for the month after the transplant, both because you're going back there multiple times per week for blood work and everything else. And also because you, in case you have an emergency or anything going on with the transplant, they want you to come to the transplant center to deal with it.
They're not to some random hospital, so you need to be close enough to be able to get emergency care at the transplant center. My sister lives three hours from her transplant center. So like I said, she got a condo that thankfully one of her congregation members, the church that she's in the you use has a condo within five minutes of the hospital and they loaned it to Amy for the month.
But we weren't going to know people who were going to be able to do that for us in Denver. So, and in San Francisco, when we lived in Napa at that transplant center, On a day with no traffic, I could possibly make it there within an hour, but probably not. And so we were going to be doing the same thing.
I'm like looking for somewhere to stay and you know, it's just not the business. And especially when you're recovering from surgery, you don't want to stay in like a hotel room for a month. I mean, you might have to, but that's not like. So we very much wanted to be close to the transplant center because we knew that that was going to be something that we needed.
Well, the reason I'm so grateful for it is because as I have started going for my initial appointments and everything else, as well as other doctor's appointments, because I'm getting the rest of my medical care through the same university health system, I've had to go there so many times, both for me and for my kids.
And it is not. To live like 13 minutes from the transplant center. And I can only imagine how much nicer it will be once we actually get into the whole transplant situation. So yeah, I'm fucking grateful. We made that choice because it is already paying off on top of that. And like adjacent to that, I am so grateful for all of the medical professionals that we have been seeing for my kid.
One of my kids is dealing with some as yet undefined. Medical problems. They have, they have physical problems, they have mental health issues. And then they're also dealing with some issues surrounding food. They're all playing off of each other. And we are trying to basically unravel a rat's nest of cords, and we have no idea where to start.
So we're just sort of picking at them when we were in Napa, our pediatrician, who had been our pediatrician for like 12, 13 years since we moved there. Was wonderful, but because it was the pandemic and B Napa is a little isolated from the rest of the bay. It was hard to get in, to see specialists when we got here, because we're in a Metro area and we're close to like the university health care system.
We got referred fairly quickly to children's hospital. And since getting into that particular system, we have seen multiple different specialists. And even though we're still trying to unravel that rat's nest, we are making slow and sure progress and the medical professionals that we have been seeing, the doctors, the residents, the nurses, the, even the people like the administrative people, everybody that we've been seeing through both children's hospital and our pediatrician's office have been nothing but accommodating and helpful.
They have been just amazing in all sorts of ways and communicative and gone to bat for us, with insurance and all sorts of different things. And so it has been. Relieving as well as something I'm super grateful for because as a parent, you want to be able to fix the problem, but when you can't figure out what the problem is, it can be so frustrating.
And I'm just, I'm so grateful that the team of people we have been working with has been accessible and helpful and communicative and, and kind and funny and just so much. It's exhausting and stressful to see so many doctors, both myself and my kid are so over it, but it would have been so much worse if we had not been seen by such an amazing group of people.
And so if anybody from children's hospital in Colorado is listening fucking rock. With your cock out. And on that same note, the school has been so helpful. My kids are at a great public high school here, and they both have gotten nothing but great support from the counseling team, from the nurses. We've had appointments with teachers to talk through some stuff, and it's just been, it's been really great.
It's been really great to come as a new family, to a high school with neither kids during, as a freshmen one as a sophomore, one is a senior to be able to come in here and be able to get as much support as we've gotten, especially considering some of the obstacles that have been in one of my kid's way.
It's just been really great. It sounds like I'm doing like an Oscar speech, but I'm not it's if you guys can understand that as a parent, like for me, It is really, really stressful when your kids have things that they're dealing with that you can't fix. And so having a supportive network in a new place where we don't really know very many people has been just it's it's I am so grateful.
I can only imagine how frazzled I would be if we had been running into like obstinacy or shittiness with some of these people and we have. So knock on wood that continues now. Any grateful list, any gratitude list I have would not be complete without my family on it. But I'm so grateful for my family, both in being able to see some of them in this last month, but also just in general, being able to talk to, or to, I am not the best communicator when it comes to my family.
Like, I, I am hard to reach by phone and I'm terrible at returning phone calls. And I am just, I can be an island of myself and my family calls me on my bullshit, but also. It's just so amazing at being there when I need them and to interact with my sisters, especially as adults with our like complicated adult lives and to be able to feel so comforted when I'm with them either physically or on the phone is just so soothing to me.
And so hilarious to imagine what my parents would think of all of us, but like, I just, I wish I could just snuggle all my family all the time, but that's just not the thing. Well, there's the family, that's here in the house, my kids and Jesse and Lou and Layla. And I am so grateful for all of them as well, but, but sometimes like, it's like my sisters, my grandpa, my uncle, my cousin, like all my peeps, just so grateful as Jesse's family to Jesse's family is awesome.
Yeah. Family. Totally a good thing. And then finally, the biggest thing I'm grateful for right now, I'm gonna have the biggest, but one of the most present things I'm grateful for is all of you, my community. And that sounds hokey, but it's not. And I could tell you why, because. I have had some times in the last couple of months where I've had like major migraines or been feeling like shit and the amount of support I get from you all in the DMS and whatever, it, I'm not great at always responding, especially when I have migraine, but I see them and it, it helps.
It's like Excedrin for migraine, except I'm allowed to have it. Cause I'm not allowed to have Excedrin for migraine. Cause my kidneys. And then when I reopened my shop in October, I wasn't expecting much to happen because I hadn't released like my calendars or the new series yet. And there was so much support and so many people interested and I just, you guys, it means a lot.
It really does. It really, really does. And I just, I need you to know that I need you to know how grateful I am for you. If you're listening to this. And you're in my community and I'm grateful for you. And if you feel unseen in your life, or if you feel taken for granted, or if you feel just blahzay or whatever, or even if you don't know that, I appreciate you.
And I mean, it I'm getting like teary-eyed because I'm fucking weepy ass fool, but like, I really appreciate you. I'm glad you're here and I cannot wait to see what else we can do together. And now I feel a little bit better. I'm not quite so cranky. And I started this with like some complicated gratitude stuff, and I was like, Cindy, you might be going about this, the wrong way for what you were hoping for.
But you know, I do feel a little bit better. I'm still cranky. I'm still terminally ill. I guess I did not cure my depression, Dr. Rachel Hollis. But what I did do was put a little bit of Alovera on it and that's what I needed right now. And I hope that that at least a little bit help. Don't forget, check out series two, fuckery flowers, and please check out my Patrion.
Even if you're not interested in becoming a patron. If you see one of my patrons in the wild, thank them because they sponsored this, they make this possible, and I appreciate the shit out of them. So very much everything I said about appreciating my community. They get double. Anyway, I hope you find something that you can reflect on today that maybe puts a little Alovera on.
Feelings you have at the moment. And until next time friends, peace out. | |||
| 12 Oct 2020 | How I'm Returning From A Social Media Break | #121 | 00:12:53 | |
I've been on an instagram break for quite some time, but I'm starting to figure out how I'll come back to it (this time with appropriate boundaries in place). Today I'm talking about the beginning stages of my plan to return.
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| 16 May 2022 | 161 | TYPE ABCD PERSONALITY TEST | 00:11:51 | |
We've all heard of Type A personalities, but what does that actually mean? And what are the other types? Today i'm digging into the A/B/C/D personality stuff! • DISCLAIMER Colorful words may be used. don't be alarmed. • NEWSLETTER • Etsy Shop is open! • FIND ME ON ALL THE THINGS YouTube - https://youtube.com/c/CindyGuentertBaldo Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/llamaletters/ Discord - https://discord.gg/Rwpp7Ww Pinterest - https://www.pinterest.com/llamaletters/ Website - www.cindyguentertbaldo.com • STUFF I MENTIONED Owlcation Article - https://owlcation.com/social-sciences/what-is-your-personality-type-type-a-or-type-b A/B Test(short) - https://openpsychometrics.org/tests/AB.php A/B Test (long) - https://testyourself.psychtests.com/testid/2141 Inquiries - cindy@cindyguentertbaldo.com | |||
| 03 Jan 2022 | 143 | New Year's Hot Takes | 00:08:29 | |
It’s the New Year, and I’m coming in hot with some… hot takes. Well, some might be lukewarm takes, but I wanted to share them anyway.
Colorful words may be used. don't be alarmed.
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TRANSCRIPTIONHello friends today is going to be a fun, little quick episode for the beginning of the new year, because it's just that time of year. And I actually have a lot of heavier topics that will be coming up soon, but I thought that today's episode would be more fun if I just kicked it off with a quick little bullshit episode.
And that is going to be my five hot takes about new years. The new year, season new year's everything. And before we get started, just to let you know, this is the uncurated life. My name is Cindy . Introductions introductions, introductions, where I talk about our lives, how we live them, especially on the internet.
Love to have you here, if this is your first time, and this is not your first time, fucking thanks for coming back. My guys. So let's jump right into it. Five hot takes surrounding the new year. Resolutions, all that shit hot take number one. I hate the terms, wellness and eat clean so very much. And I swear to God.
It's already getting something, getting bombarded across social media at me. I hate them much like the word authentic to me. I feel like they have lost all of their meaning. I think wellness feels like a copy paste to go in and replace the word diet and everything. Now it's like the same stuff. Just different language.
I think that eat clean. Is, uh, it's like also like getting rid of toxins is a bullshit term. Like what the fuck is eating clean mean? Like what does it really mean? Because people have different ideas. So that's my hot tick that I hate those words so much, so much. They make my eyebrow Twitch and I will be excited when the new years hustle and bustle is over.
And that shit mellows out. B to B be tuned, stay tuned because I will be doing some episodes coming up on what I think is toxic wellness culture, hot take number two, staying up until midnight on new year's Eve sucks. Total ass. Now I know I used to do when I was. 'cause you didn't get to stay up till midnight.
Very often. I think the first time I really was over, it was 2000, the 1999 to 2002 new year's Eve. The Y2K thing, we were all convinced the world was going to end at the time I was working as a bagger at a grocery. While still in college and people went, they just, they lost their shit over the Y2K shit and they bought the water and the canned goods and everything.
And I worked an 11 to eight shift that day. Exhausted trying to keep up with the number of people shopping because they thought the world was going to fucking end at midnight before year 2000. So the next day I was scheduled to work a seven to four shift. And when I got home, I was living with four other people.
Boyfriends and everything else. And they were all gonna stay up and have like a party and like, yeah, check out the world ends. And they're like sitting here and you going to stay up with us and I'm like, no, I'm going to go to bed. I am tired. But what if the world ends? I'm like, I'll find out in the morning when I wake up to go to work motherfuckers.
And since then, I swear to God, like I may have had times where I've wanted to stay up. Especially if I went to a party, I've even hosted some new year's Eve parties, but to be perfectly honest, I am too fucking old to stay up that late. I want to go to bed at 10:00 PM and. When I go to bed at 10 it's midnight, somewhere we're in mountain time.
It's midnight on the east coast. When I go to bed at 10. It's good enough for me, man. I'll take number three. I both really dislike having an arbitrary date for setting goals and resolutions. And I also really love the feeling around new year's and setting goals and resolutions and that daikon. Pisses me off, like part of me is like, oh, it's an arbitrary date.
And the other part of me is like, fuck. Yeah, I love the arbitrary date. And I can't decide which one is, which it's kind of how I feel when I make some consumerism videos. And I'm like, oh my God, don't buy all the things. Oh my God. Buy all the things. And deep down, I can tell it's like the duality of man and the duality of man around the arbitrary date of new year's for some reason.
Fry's mine, ARDS, and I don't know why I can't figure out why I can't just be okay with one course or the other. I don't know, man, but my hot take is that both the arbitrary date sucks and the arbitrary date is great. And I don't really know the answer to that question. That's my hot take hot take number four.
I don't even know if this is a hot take so much, but bear with me. I'm convinced that. The whole new year season, right from like the start of the holiday season through like February, right. Is two planner companies, as well as diet and exercise companies. What Valentine's day and Halloween are two candy companies.
Would we be as excited to set goals on January 1st? If we weren't marketed to so heavily, would we be so excited to let's wellness eat clean on January 1st? If we weren't marketed to so heavily, what came first? The resolutions or the marketing? I'm sure there's probably a way to find that out, but like just in general, like I play right into it.
I fucking love this. I have videos going up. You go back to the last week and a half on my YouTube channel and it's all sorts of goals and every. Like I'm right there with the rest of you. But the, the part of me that kind of sits up in my back of my brain and like the same one that struggles with the duality of man about everything else, right.
Sits there and is like, but Cindy, would this be as exciting to you if there weren't so many products coming out, geared towards this? Who knows? I don't know, but my hot take. Maybe that's the case, and I'm still going to go along with it just as I'm still going to go eat the shit out of some Halloween candy.
And I'm not really a big fan of Valentine's day, but I am a big fan of all of the extra chocolate that comes out. So I dunno, I don't know. Maybe the world may never know. And high-tech number five. There is nothing wrong with keeping your Christmas lights up and your tree up until February. Not just because you might be lazy, but because that shit is cozy to me, one of the biggest benefits of having an artificial tree is you can leave it up as long as you want to.
Now, we actually know some people in our family who keep a tree up all year, not decorated, just the lights, because they like the whole. I don't think I would go that far for myself personally, because I think that there is a specialness that comes to when you get all the lights out and everything that like adds that coziness.
And I wonder if I kept them up all year inside the house that it might start to just become background noise to me, but keeping it up until February. Fuck. Yeah. And I also, I guess this is the same hot take, but just sort of continuing on with it is that people who. Judge other people for keeping lights on their house year round can suck my Dick because a putting those up as annoying B, does it really matter all that much?
And see maybe some people like having their lights that maybe they want to light their house up all year. You don't know. So just mind your business, but I will say, I will say that for me. Generally speaking, a big part of this is not just the coziness, but also the laziness. So there is that, but heartache, yes.
I don't know how much of a hot tech this is. I know some people are like, no Christmas lights up until after Thanksgiving. And some people are like, oh, but you must take it down by new year's. And for me. Keep him up as long as you want to, because they're fun. So those are my hot takes for the new year. If you have a hot take surrounding new years and all of the stuff kind of going with it, make sure to post it on Instagram stories and tag me at Lama letters so that I can see it.
I'd love to see your hot takes because I'm big fan of the hot takes. Make sure you also think my patrons or check out my Patrion. If you're interested as they are the sponsors of this podcast and they make my hot takes possible, you can check out www.patreon.com/cindyguentertbaldo to find out more next week is probably going to be a heavier topic.
So this, this was a light one. I hope you enjoyed it. And until next time my friends have a great week and peace out. | |||
| 25 Nov 2019 | About Those Gratitude Challenges... | #85 | 00:17:36 | |
In the spirit of American Thanksgiving this week, I’m musing about how Instagram style gratitude/thankfulness trackers really don’t do shit for me, and why I think that might be.
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| 07 Dec 2020 | Saved by the Bell & Selena Gomez?? | #126 | 00:18:22 | |
Let's talk about living kidney donors and not funny jokes on 90s reboots.
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| 18 Oct 2021 | 132 | LULAWHA? The LuLaRich Documentary | 00:33:37 | |
If you’ve been around the planner world (or shit, the online world) you probably know about LuLaRoe. Amazon Prime released a documentary called LuLaRich chronicling the rise and fall of the MLM - I’ve got so many thoughts!
Colorful words may be used. don't be alarmed.
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TRANSCRIPTIONHey everybody. Welcome back to the uncurated life podcast. My name is Cindy Guentert-Baldo. If this is your first time here. Welcome if this is not your first time here. Hell yeah. I'm glad that you're back. Blah-blah-blah let's get into today's episode really quick, but before I do, I want to give you a quick announcement.
How many times can I say quick? And this episode who knows, right? The announcement is that this coming up Thursday, October 21st, 2021, my Etsy shop will be reopening. I will have all of the series, one fuckery flowers, my art prints of realistic flowers with naughty words, hidden in them. All of the series one, the flowers that were in the shop before we'll be back with all prints and postcards available as well as a couple of small, new, like stocking stuffer type items, a few bookmarks and vinyl sticker packs.
You can find the link to it in the show notes. And soon in the next few weeks, I will be updating it with limited edition calendars with series two and series one fuckery flowers on them. And then in later November, there will be the launch of series two, which is. Set up 12 new fuckery flowers with prints and postcards, as well as some bundles of things that will include both series.
So if that is something you have been waiting for, or you haven't checked it out yet, my Etsy shop will be linked in the show notes and you can go ahead and favorite it, do all the things and look for it on October 21st. Now let's get into the episode. We're going to talk about Lula rich today. Why is this relevant to the planner world?
Yes, it's fucking relevant to the planner world. If you don't know why it's relevant to the planner world trust, I will tell you about that. So what is Lula rich? Let's start right. Lulu rich is a documentary on Amazon prime. It just came out well, it came out in September and I binge watched all four episodes of it.
It's about the rise and fall of the multi-level marketing company. They interview current and ex. Retailers or consultants. They're the people that are actually part of the multi-level marketing company. They interview former employees of the home office, the corporate side of it, and most interesting.
They interview mark and DeAnn Stedham who are the founders of the company, as well as some of their family members who were put into high level positions within the company. One of the things that I thought was interesting is that the documentary was made by the same people who made the documentary about the fire festival.
So they have had some experience making documentaries about dumpster fires. So what is LuLaRoe in case you don't know? And if you don't know, I. Remarkably jealous of you. LuLaRoe's a multi-level marketing company. If you don't know what multi-level marketing is, and I'm really jealous of you, it is direct sales is another name for it.
Some people call them pyramid schemes. Although in the U S in the laws, there are very specific rules that govern pyramid scheme. Versus multi-level marketing companies, pyramid schemes are illegal. Multi-level marketing companies are not honestly, I don't really see that much of a difference between the two.
And if you really want an interesting, entire deep dive on multi-level marketing companies, I will recommend the first season of the dream, a podcast. They did a limited series on multi-level marketing. That's outstanding. But in general, multi-level marketing is a business model where there is a company that produces something, whether it's it's essential oils like young living or what's the other one.
I don't remember. There's some other fun. Essential oils. I don't give a fuck or like makeup. Some of the most famous makeup ones are like Mary Kay and Avon. Then there's Amway, which is one of the most famous Tupperwares, also multi-level marketing company, but there's all sorts of them. And during the age of social media, they've exploded because of how social media works.
And Lula Roe really leaned into that. We'll talk about that in a second, but in the idea of a multi-level marketing, is that. There's a company that makes some sort of a product rather than sell that product to stores or sell it themselves like wholesale it, they sell it to consultants, quote, independent consultants who are not employed by the company.
They send a contract with the company, but they're not employed by the company. The consultants buy the products at wholesale and then sell them to customers at re. No in and of itself, that doesn't sound like such a problem, right? Except that a lot, or the majority of multi-level marketing companies, the money is not made in the sales of the product.
The money is made in recruiting more consultants underneath you to then by-product from the company and sell to customers. The problem here is a, if the real money is made through recruiting, rather than selling the product. Then the people at the top make the most money and then, but they have to depend on more and more levels of people beneath them.
Hence the term pyramid scheme. The other problem that you run into is that while they say there's like so many people that you can recruit and blah, blah, blah, if you're recruiting your customer base sooner or later, you don't have anybody to sell to now social media, once again has blown this all up because you can reach out to more than just your, your sphere of influence in like your community or whatever.
But like it, it can, a company can really hit like a level of saturation and that's when shit can start to go a little wonky. Now, if you really want to really delve into like the side of people who have been burned by this, besides watching Lula rich, Google, anti MLM, trust me, you'll find all sorts of.
But we're talking about LuLaRoe. So LuLaRoe is a MLM that sells clothing. It started with maxi skirts expanded in to quote, buttery, soft leggings, and then a whole bunch of other things. The. Clothing was mainly geared towards women. And one of the things, one of the like selling points of it was that they had all of these like wild prints for the fabrics that these clothes were made out of.
And that any given print was only going to be. Into like 3000 pieces and then it would be gone. And so retailers will be getting in there. The consultants will get in their orders of prints. And if you got one of the prints that was like a very popular one, then people would want to shop with you. It also supposedly was going to encourage collaboration with other retailers because people would be looking for certain things.
And if you didn't have it, but you had other friends who were consultants, they might have it. So you could serve your customers that way, which is an interesting way to go about it. Okay. Now, one of the things that was, is pretty painful about Lula Rowe is that retailers, which is what they call their consultants.
Um, don't get to choose the prints. They can pick the styles and they can pick the sizes, the prints, however, we're not their choice. They would not know what they were getting until they open their box, which could be very cool except, and Lula rich really. Demonstrates, this really shows a lot of the evidence of this.
Not all of these prints are nice. I've heard people refer to some of them as Doritos leggings. There is a lot of them where the way the leggings were made, it would look super like a badge or a penis because of just the unfortunate way the pieces were stick together. And as time went on, the prince got more and more janky and more and more not desirable.
And so these consultants would wind up with a lot of inventory that they couldn't sell because it was ugly. And then on top of that, the only way to get better inventory would be to order more and more and more. And you can see where this could become a problem. Now there's two things that really are important to understand about LuLaRoe's specifically one because it's clothing and because it's like meant to be an inventory, heavy business, the initial package.
Is like at least $5,000, you have to spend a huge chunk of money upfront and then continually order more and more you with some multilevel marketing companies, you could get a catalog and sell from the catalog and then order as the money comes in, that would be the least risky way to go about things.
But in LuLaRoe, because you don't know what you're getting until you get it, you literally have to buy a bunch of shit in order to sell a bunch of shit. So there's that the second thing to know about LuLaRoe is that it, it really started in the mid 2010s, I believe, right? As Facebook lives and Periscope and things like that were becoming really big.
So. A lot of consultants started to do Facebook lives. They get their box of stuff. They go live on Facebook in their group or on their page where they had a bunch of potential customers. And then they would just show items and people would comment sold and that's how they would sell them. And this just really blew up and a bunch of other multi-level marketing companies hell or use social media now, too.
But it got very big on Facebook very quickly. And this is where the connection to the planter community begins. So. Around 2016 and I could be wrong. It could have been 2015, but I, my best memory is around like late 2015, early 2016, Lula Rowe sorta started to take over the planter community. It started with a few retailers in the planner world, and then they began to recruit from the planner community.
Now I understand why this is. I'm going to generalize a little bit here, but a lot of people in the planter, community or women, especially back then, a lot of people in the planner community are introverted. I'm generalizing. And there's a lot of them that are moms. A lot of them that they, I w I would, I would say that in, especially in like the circles of planner committee that I've run in, like the PGW kind of area.
There were a lot of people that were kind of ripe for the picking when it came to Louisville road, because one of the things that they did well at the beginning was sell clothing that was comfortable and Dorito his side was not like entirely unflattering. But it was comfortable. I got some, I got the maxi skirts because they were the longest maxi skirts with a nice wide band around the belly.
I'm six foot two. It's hard to find maxi skirts that are actually maxi on me, but the Lula ones I got were, they also had a. Irma. That was like a tunic length top that was long enough to cover my plumber's butt crack, which again is very difficult for me to find because of how tall I am. It's just, it's hard for me to find.
And so there were certain items from LuLaRoe that were just there. We're well-suited for me and I was comfortable in them and I appreciated that. And I wasn't the only one now I also had to get into a little bit of that hunting kind of mindset, because I didn't want any wacky prints. I wanted solids.
And so solids were like a big unicorn, especially black leggings. Oh my God. So hard to find. But so the people who came, who were planned or people who got into Lula Rowe had a really great audience for them kind of already there. So those people, they sold their products to planner. People, built groups from planner people and built their teams from planner.
People. The teams are pretty big and there was a lot of them. And LuLaRoe was everywhere. There were all sorts of people like asking about different groups and blah, blah, blah, but it came kind of to a really frothy head at go wild 2017. And now. So the go wild team, the people that put the, the org, the welfare planners, people that put on the actual conference decided that year, that for the plan Gemma party, they were going to rent the little bar, like, like corridor that's at the, uh, the Gaylord hotel in Nashville that the conference was being held at.
There were these three bars, there was a karaoke bar. There was a kind of a club style bar. And then there was a smaller situation. And what they decided to do was rent all three of those out and like close it off to just the people that were coming to play in JAMA. So Erin Condron sponsored the clubs, style bar, Krissyanne designs sponsored the karaoke bar, but that was the third bar.
And remember, this was the second year of go wild and it was only 700 people coming. So the number of like companies that had. Been willing to put large amounts of money into the conference. We're still very, it was a, still a very short list because it was so new. And so they decided to allow a Lula Roe pop-up to sponsor the third.
Now, um, a lot of this is anecdotal evidence. I don't know all of the details behind any of this. This is just like I said, from my observations, from being in the community and being at the event. But. Uh, one of the groups of consultants in the planner community decided that they would as a team. So they were all on a team together.
They were all in one downline. They decided to pool together and sponsor the bar so that they could bring their shit and put all their clothes out and let consultants shop. And it seemed like, you know, a smart financial move for them because so many people in the planner community were buying shit anyway.
So they were going to have them kind of as a, as a captive audience. Right. There were two controversies that came from this one was that at this point, and even to this day go wild does not have a shopping component to it. Every once in a while, there will be like a place you can buy things or like one.
Opportunity to buy things. But one of the reasons they don't have like a vendor hall or haven't had a vendor hall in the past is because they wanted the shop owners who are part of the community to actually get to come and meet their customers and enjoy the conference, not spend their whole time vending.
I think that's a great idea personally, although I do know some people who get sad that there's not a lot of shit to buy, but personally you get so much shit from the conference. So much swag anyway. That's like, where would I put it? Like I barely have enough room anymore. Regardless. So there was that there was a lot of sore feelings that these people were going to be allowed to sell when selling was not allowed.
Otherwise, the other source of hard feelings was that there were other Lula consultants who wanted to bring their sh who were not in that team who wanted to bring their shit and sell it like out of their hotel rooms. But there was like a band put on that because this team. Had sponsored the bar, they got to, um, have like exclusive rights, again, make sense because they're putting the money into the sponsorship so they can demand that, that happens a lot with sponsorships, you can, and other kinds of contracts, like I've had contracts with people before where I have signed exclusivity with them for a certain thing as part of the contract.
Like it makes sense. But one of the things I saw people bitching about. And it's understandable was that there wasn't an opportunity for them to step up. It was suggested, and then it just happened and other people felt left out of it. I get that when I say bitchy and I don't mean that in a negative way, I actually mean that in a, like it's like they were, they were upset about it.
And I get that. I do understand that I could see both sides of this particular situation. Looking back on it. I'm like kind of grossed out by the whole thing, Maine. Mainly because of my feelings about MLMs. And I have a lot of feelings about MLMs and I'll expand on that in a bit, but like, I think that.
Part of the reason I wasn't. So skeeved out by Emma, the Lula Roe specific MLM at the time was because I had found a couple of items of clothing that worked for me, but I was already getting really kind of grossed out about how it felt like the planner world was becoming like fertile recruiting territory because at the heart of it, multilevel marketing is predatory and that's something that Lulu right shows.
Anyway. So that was the. The situation, I will update you on some of those planner connections as I finished talking about the documentary, but I wanted to give a bunch of context, 17 minutes of context, of both what LuLaRoe is and how it connects to the planter world. So now let's talk about the documentary.
I'm not going to spoil it. You should watch it. I promise you. If you have Amazon prime, you should watch it. It's four hour for, I don't think it's four hours. I don't think they're all an hour long, but it's four parts. Give yourself the time to watch them all in a row, because you may not want to step away from it.
The first takeaway I have what a fucking hot mess, and I'm not even talking about. There's there's two kinds of big, hot messes. There's the hot mess of the clothing. One of the reasons that Lulu burrow began to sink as a, as a company was that the clothing went downhill. The patterns you learn in the documentary, that the people who had to design the pattern.
Unhealthy as somebody who does graphic design and can make repeating patterns like very unhealthy unreasonable quotas, like impossible quotas to make. So that's where like a bunch of plagiarizing came in and a bunch of other garbage and Dorito prints, right. There was also stuff being kept outside. So it was moldy and like wet.
And so consultants were getting nasty shit and the company wasn't helping them with it. So there's that the quality was going down. But then on top of that, and maybe kind of in tandem with that. The way the company was run was a hot fucking mess up Mickey mouse horseshit, right. They hired their chip mark.
And Dan had between them like, hell fucking children, like 14 children or something. There, there, there are latter day saints or Mormons. They between them and a whole bunch of children, including a pair of children who are married to each other fucking glossed right over that. But like, They put their children into like all of the executive offices, despite none of them having any experience at that.
So it doesn't surprise me that a company that grew that quickly, like they show how fast the revenue and the consultants grew. It's like ridiculously fast growth with incompetent people running the company. It was bound to explode at some point, and it just happened to explode. And she sent out shrapnel of stinky leggings and penis crunch.
So there's that right? The second big takeaway was how they portrayed mark and Deanne Stidham, which I actually thought was very. Very clever of them. They interviewed the two of them, the founders of the company in their fancy office. She's wearing like designer heels, looking all like made up and very Tammy Faye Bakker.
And they're sitting there and they're like swab and like answering their questions, all calm and cool and collected. And then they juxtapose the filmmakers juxtapose. With segments from their deposition, from one of the multitude of lawsuits that are against them, which I'll get into in a minute and how the answers they give the interviewers and the answers in the depositions.
Don't always track with each other. It's very, very telling it very much, kind of informs your opinion of them as you're watching the show. The other thing that I found was really, really just both gross and also amusing was them fronting like they're feminists talking about how they're trying to like empower women.
This is a women empowerment company to run your own business and blah, blah, blah. Except it comes out during the documentary that they want to hammer home like traditional gender roles. Like once you get going, you need to make sure your husband is respected. Bring him into the business. Cool with your business, you should find a new husband, but like he still needs to call the shots.
And then they started to talk about like how they wanted it, like have feminine a feminist company, female empowering company. And before DeAnn could answer her husband talked right over her. Like it was a beautiful, I think it's in the trailer. It's a beautiful example of how ridiculous this shit is. Now I felt really like another thing that I took away from the whole documentary was how conflicted I felt about all of the ex consultants that they interviewed, especially the ones who built massive teams.
They had some coaches, which is like the second highest level on the pyramid. And, um, at least two mentors. So that's the highest level that you could reach. And they were talking about their regrets and the way they felt about certain things. And I felt very sympathetic towards them, especially as somebody who like filed for bankruptcy because of an MLM, like I felt sympathetic to them.
But at the same time, I really felt also that except for one there's one exception to it. And you'll know when you watch the documentary, who the exception is based on. The way that she talks about things, but none of them seem to really, they felt awful about their situation, but none of them really seemed to cope or like talk about the fact that they were predators.
Like, if this is what happened to you, what happened to all of the people below you? All of the people, like one of them had thousands of people on her team. Is there remorse. Do you feel bad about it? If you really want a nuanced take like a really good take about this? I would suggest you watch the video on the financial diet channel, where she talks about that.
A link in the show notes. She also has a. Good. She's great conversation about how the only way to change the culture in which multilevel marketing continues to proliferate is that we can't just get mad at the people who run the companies. We also need to get mad at the people who use the companies to make money, like the people who recruit a whole bunch of people.
And where's the line drawn. Like if you recruit one, I think I recruited three people over the course of my time at a multi-level marketing. And does that make me predatory? Compared to somebody who, who recruited like 2,500 people. I don't know. You know, I have no idea. So, so there's that right? Check that video out.
And there was one particular couple who I was really grossed out by, and that was the, I think they're called the . They weren't, they never quit. They were fired from Lula Rowe and they didn't seem to show any. Like I don't, I think they'd still be in it today if they hadn't been fired. And they were like there for sympathy and it's like, I don't feel sympathy for you.
It's hard to feel sympathy for you got fired from something that really sucked. And now you're speaking out against it, but you would still be like playing into the suckiness if you hadn't been fired question mark. I don't know why just look and say, you got to watch the documentary. I'm curious to know.
And then there was an entirely other situation that really is not a multilevel marketing thing, but just a toxic fucking wellness. Diet, I'm really into the podcast maintenance phase. If you haven't listened to that 10 out of 10 recommend. And like, I have been working really hard to try and like deprogram myself from diet culture.
And I'll talk a lot more about that in some upcoming episodes. But the thing that like kind of came out of the blue and I sorta knew about it from other anti MLM stuff I saw, but like the way it was described just really, really got me was the weight loss surgery. Shit.
If you haven't seen it yet, I'm not going to spoil you too much, except to let you know if the talk of like weight loss surgery, and having to maintain a certain physique to be accepted is triggering to you. That is something to watch out for when you're watching this documentary, because it absolutely comes up.
Let's just say that the owners, the owners of LuLaRoe had a fucking life. Group chat to get people to go to Tijuana and get weight loss surgery, and you were pressured to do it so that you can look a certain way, reinforcing certain roles about how somebody should look. It's fucking gnarly dudes, and I'm not going to go too deep into it right now just to say, Hey, watch out for that.
If it's in, it's hard for you and be damn right. But I will say that one of the biggest aha moments that came to me at the end of the documentary. And this brings it back to the planner world. The biggest aha moment to me came at the end from Robert Fitzpatrick. He is an expert on MLMs and he is somebody that they interviewed for the documentary.
And he he's the one who shows up throughout it to explain things about how MLMs in general work. He's actually does a very good job about that as well. So that'll help you if you're still confused when you watch the documentary. I'm also going to read his book soon, and I will be sure to discuss that here.
He said that once an MLM gets big enough, it's damn near impossible to make money when you get recruited into it, because you need to get in early enough. To be one of the people that are higher up in the pyramid, the later you get into it, the more likely it is that you're going to have a hard time finding other people who haven't either heard of it and been burned by it or heard of it and been recruited themselves.
So when an MLM starts to struggle or loses popularity or start sending their consultants, slimy leggings, the people who are higher up in the pyramid, the ones who already have big teams, big. We'll bounce and go to a newer, more up and coming MLM to start the cycle all over again, to get it on the ground floor so that they can build their team from people that they brought with them.
And then shoot up to the top of the pyramid. Now, when he said that my jaw was on the floor, not because this was new knowledge to me, this is not something that I didn't already like, no, but it was the first time that I had really. Wrapped my mind around the fact that a lot of the people who recruited heavily from the planner community when Lula rose started to cruise down hill bounced to another MLM.
And now a lot of them are higher up on the pyramid. There it's a nail Polish company by the way, but I'm not going to, and like I'm not condemning every single person who's in an MLS. I could, but I'm not going to mainly because a blanket condemnation is something that I struggle with, especially with my, like, you, you values that I so have trouble living up to sometimes, but I will say that, like that particular comment it's like you held a mirror up to the planner community and it was an, you could see that exact story play.
And it's still playing out today. It just makes you go. Hmm. Now there's a bunch of other things that this documentary gets into gets into race and how MLMs, especially ones like Lula Roe are. Really geared towards a certain demographic of white women. Who's a good target. Like who's easily recruitable, who are the people that are easily preyed on.
There's a reason that there are a lot of military spouses that get recruited into MLMs because they are looking for like community and you can find one in an MLM until. I don't want to do it anymore, then that community has gone and I can do more, but I'm not an anti MLM podcast, but I could totally do some more episodes on them in general.
And my experience is on them. But I will tell you generally speaking, I have not talked a lot about them in my, on my YouTube channel or here on the podcast, because. I had a, I had a shitty experience that really messed my family up really fucked my life up. And I take responsibility for the choices I made.
I'm the one who decided to do it. I'm the one who spent the money. I'm the one who caused my family to file for bankruptcy because of it. I'm the one who recruited a handful, a couple of people into it. I did those things and the consequences for those things were brought because of my actions. As I look back on it, I was a perfect person to be preyed on.
I was a brand new mom. I was out on disability because of tendonitis. My everything was really hard. We were like scraping by. I was a perfect candidate for it and I can see how I was pulled into it, but I don't like to talk too much about my really strong feelings about MLMs. Because I know from personal experience how touchy and like fraught that conversation is, especially for people who are still in.
And it just makes me extremely uncomfortable to talk about it. It's one of those, like it's like throwing them all to top cocktail and I just, there's all sorts of times, I'm fine to throw the cocktail. And this is one in particular that just is very difficult for me. So I haven't decided exactly how deep I want to get into anti-Muslim.
And it would mainly be on this podcast now on the YouTube channel, just because it's not really related, but like, it may be changing soon. I may be willing to do more depending on how this comes out, but this, this documentary kind of like was a reminder to me of a lot of my feelings and it brought up a lot of other feelings as well.
So I wanted to mention that because it can be a really difficult thing for me to even wrap my mind. Yeah. But, like I said, the documentary brings up all sorts of things about race, about. Income inequality about the role of religion, especially Mormonism in the forming of a lot of MLMs. There's a reason a lot of them have come out of Utah.
Like there's a reason for it. The toxic positivity that like infused. MLM culture, the toxic wellness culture, which is going to be definitely something that's coming up on this podcast in the next couple of months, because it's high on my list of things to talk about. Like there's a lot of things that this documentary touches on, but doesn't really dive deep.
It could have been a lot longer. I would love to see a documentary of this quality made about the MLM industry as a whole. But the problem you run into with that is that the MLM industry has the government in its pocket. There's a reason that it hasn't been regulated and it's not a Democrat thing, and it's not a Republican thing.
It's a government thing. And they're like, you should go listen to the dream for a lot more information about that. But yeah, I just wanted to give you some of my thoughts on it and provide some context because I have seen a lot of people in the planter community talking about wanting to watch this. And a lot of people who were around for that who were like, hell yeah, planner, community LuLaRoe, blah, blah, blah.
And a lot of people wondering what the fuck? Why, why is the planner community? Why are so many people in the planner community? So excited to watch this documentary? I wanted to provide some of that context because I think it really does inform how MLMs can be very, they can be very predatory on groups of people, especially with.
And how the planner community was impacted by that. Anyway, now that I talked all about that, if you have watched it, I would love to hear your thoughts. You can let me know, tag me at Lama letters on Instagram, in your stories. I'd love to find out your thoughts. And, uh, also keep an eye out for my Etsy shop reopening this Thursday, the 21st, which is not a multi-level marketing company.
I make these prints and then I sell them to you. And I will not recruit you to sell them to someone else because they're fuckery flowers, not fuckery business practices. Also, if you haven't signed up for my newsletter yet the October freebie has started to go out. I'm so sorry if you were not able to get it earlier, but you should get it by now.
If you start to sign up for it, there will be a new one in November. All of this stuff is linked in the show notes as always. This is sponsored by my patrons. They are fucking rad. They. Support me in everything I do. And hopefully I have not pissed too many of them off with any of my recent episodes. I guess we'll find out won't we on the Patrion page, you can check it out at www.patreon.com/cindyguentertbaldo to find out more as always take care of yourselves.
I'll see you next Monday. And until next time, my friends peace out.
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| 21 Mar 2022 | I'M FAILING AT HOBBIES | 154 | 00:11:03 | |
SHOWNOTESA big goal for me in 2022 is to reconnect with and discover hobbies. And while this is something I really want to do, I'm having trouble making time for it. • DISCLAIMER Colorful words may be used. don't be alarmed. • NEWSLETTER • Etsy Shop is open! • FIND ME ON ALL THE THINGS YouTube - https://youtube.com/c/CindyGuentertBaldo Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/llamaletters/ Discord - https://discord.gg/Rwpp7Ww Pinterest - https://www.pinterest.com/llamaletters/ Website - www.cindyguentertbaldo.com • STUFF I MENTIONED Working To Live Article - https://www.peaceinnovation.com/blog/working-to-live-the-importance-of-hobbies Frugal Crafter Video - https://youtu.be/cQTGOwktV30 Inquiries - cindy@cindyguentertbaldo.com TRANSCRIPTIONSo I, I took a look at my goals for the year and how I'm doing on them and so far. And one thing that is standing out to me is that I have been struggling to make time for the hobbies that I would like to pursue. And I want to talk about that. Hi everybody. I'm Cindy Guentert-Baldo welcome back to the uncurated life podcast, where we talk about life, both on and off of the internet. And today, whew. I'm feeling, I'm feeling a little personally called out. I called myself out here in that I am, I want to reconnect with hobbies, but I am not making time for it. When I said about life, both on and off of the internet, part of what I wanted to do was reconnect with hobbies that I didn't feel the need to share with on the internet. And I just can't seem to break that habit. So why is that? Why am I having trouble making time for hobbies? Why, why do I want them in the first place? Why are hobbies important? Let's let's start there. Let's start there. And I would also add that if you haven't listened to episode 1 52, which came out two weeks ago on boredom to listen to that one as well, because I feel like these two are intrinsically connected to each other. I want to be bored. I want more time for hobbies. I feel like these things, if I can solve one, I might be able to solve the. Anyway, the biggest reasons hobbies are important. We know a lot of these things, right? We know that they can help us decompress and help us with our anxiety. They can stimulate creativity. They can make time, help you make time for yourself and spend more time with others. Meet new people. Non pandemic wise when you're going like to groups of like knitting circles or whatnot. Anyway, I mean, I've been a lot of friends through my plan or hobby that's that's one way to meet new people. So there's an article I read on peace, innovation.com written by, uh, Deondra garner called working to live the importance of hobbies. And I'm going to read from that article because I think it really nails. Quote, hobbies are a great way to decompress after a long day at work or on your day off. When life becomes too overwhelming, your hobbies can help you relax. Doing something you enjoy outside of work can be beneficial for your mental health. Having hobbies can lower anxiety, lower your stress level and help cope with depression. Hobbies help you form a life outside of work. You are just relaxing and doing something you enjoy without any of the pressures of. Side world. You don't have to do something as structured as you would at work or school. You don't have the added stress of attending on time to participate or working with a group or completing a task by a specific time. These aspects are what make hobbies such have such a positive outcome. When you're stressed, you can go paint, exercise, read, or do a plethora of other activities to lessen the amount of stress you have. Hobbies can also increase your interaction with people and the value you can bring to each other. Participating in hobbies with others can sometimes make the hobby more enjoyable because you're doing something you enjoy with people who have the same love and passion for the activity that you have. They get also impact your interaction with your family. When you find a new hobby, you can share it with your family. This gives you more time spent with your family and you're doing something you all enjoy. Another reason you should get a hobby is to gain knowledge. Hobbies, often teach you things that can have a positive impact on your life. The knowledge you could gain from a hobby will stay with you for life. Meaning you could use this knowledge when you're 35 or when you're 85. After you figure out if you want to get a hobby, the next step is finding the right hobby for you. And quote. So the funny thing was, as I was starting to like, look into articles and shit on this. And I was reading that and thinking about the hobby, the right hobbies for me, and then an, an video popped up in my feed from the frugal crafter, which I'll link below. And it was called, do you even like your hobby anymore? And the whole point of the video was like, you know, you might be doing something because you've always done it, but. Is it actually bringing you joy anymore? Do you even like it anymore? D are you buying shit for the sake of buying shit rather than because it's bringing you joy. And that was something that actually caused me to think. Because lately, like I said, I've had some aspirations to reconnect with certain hobbies. One of the things the frugal crafter brought up was saying that sometimes we want to return to a hobby because it's something we used to do, but. We may not be in a stage in our life that we like it anymore. Part of me wonders if this is sort of how I'm feeling about acrylic painting, because I've been trying to work on these paintings for my living room and I just keep putting it off now. I don't know if that's because it's not, I'm not into it anymore. I was never super into it in the first place. Cause I never really took the time. One of the reasons I like watercoloring is I can just spritz the pallet and get going. But with acrylics it takes a lot more cleanup and I fucking hate cleanup. So maybe that. I dunno, I'm not ready to drop it yet, but at the same time it gave me some food for thought. Another thing that I was thinking about was the hobbies. I know I enjoy. But sometimes I'm just not in the mood for them. Examples would be baking. I have not baked for the most part since I moved to Denver. And I know for a fact that part of the reason I haven't been doing that is because I am scared as fuck about adjusting recipes for the altitude. And then there is. Reading, which is something I don't seem to have time for during the day. And then in the evening, when I normally would read, I have been so brain dead from the day that I just don't feel like reading more and I would just rather get on my phone and play candy crush. And that's, we're going to, we're going to head into candy crush land for a second because currently candy crush is my hobby and it's not like I. It's not like I love it. It just, it gives me that short-term little dopamine kit. I can recognize that. I recognize that it's just something to do when I'm starting to feel bored back to the episode about wanting to feel more bored and bringing the candy crush out. And then if there's no lives left, I get frustrated because I'm like, but I want to play it right. I'm thinking I might need to just delete the apps off my phone and I might, I may wind up just doing that, but it seems to be the go-to for me right now when I am bored and needing something to do. And instead of going and finding my book or doing something else, I just grabbed my phone. Scroll, Instagram, play candy crush. It's not a great cycle for me. I'm not like if that was, if you love candy crush or some other game on your phone and that's the hobby you enjoy. Like enjoy partaking in then fucking more power to you. But I can tell when I'm doing it, that this is not something that is great for me either mentally or in any other way. This is just, it's not my, my ideal thing, but it's the easy thing. And that's the thing that I'm just diving into right now, because I'm just so tired all the time from feeling so crappy because that's a big part of it is the exhaustion and the crappiness of how I'm feeling like I'm so tired and I'm dealing with. Pain and misery in my body from being in kidney failure, that the thought of expending more energy on hobbies, is it just, it feels overwhelming and frankly, a little like annoying, like why would I fucking. But I recognize why I need to do that. It it's, there's so much there that would help me. My word of the year is replenish and it will help replenish my thought process. I actually got through both January and February is one little word projects recently because I was waiting for all the shit to come in. It was shipping delays and I can't start something unless I have the right things. Cause that's just how neurotic I am. Did it was so proud of myself and so excited. I shared it with my Patriots and then I shared it with my kids and I was like, look at this thing, blah, blah, blah, did not post it on the internet except to my patrons. So there's that, but it brought me, it brought me so much joy and it wasn't a big. A big deal. It didn't take a lot of time for me to work on it. I worked on it and I put the time into it that I felt like putting into it and I enjoyed it and I was proud of it and it made me happy. And I realized, this is the thing these hobbies can do for me, if I can manage to make the time for them. So. I think maybe one step to making time might be the whole boredom thing, trying to make boredom a habit to then have room for hobbies, and then maybe deleting some of the things off my phone that are distracting me from it. But the other hobby I'd kind of like to pick up, which is not in my goals, but I kind of want to go back to animal crossing. It's been over a year since I played animal crossing. And I'm worried that if I get back into. Suck my life away, the way that it did when I, when I was playing it, when the pandemic started, but to be fair, I'm in kidney failure and I was having a really hard time. And so it made sense. I don't know if it makes sense anymore, but cat's gotten back into it and I've been watching what they're doing and I'm like, oh fuck. I kind of want to do that too. I don't know. I think I need to, re-examine the hobbies I'm trying to pick up. And decide if maybe it's enjoyment that I don't, I'm not anticipating getting, or maybe it's too hard and uncomfortable to get into. Am I expecting too much? Am I expecting to get too much, get too much pleasure out of my hobbies right up front. Do I need to put the little work in the houseplant thing is going okay. I'm not as on top of it as I should be, but I am working on it. I'd love to hear from you, how you make time for your hobbies. This kind of is not a very long episode, but honestly I just sort of needed to get off my chest that I am. I am. I have all the intentions in the world of making time for hobbies for my own. But I'm not following through on it. I would love your tips. I would love your help and your experiences. Let me know, tag me at @llamaletters on Instagram and your stories. And let me know. I'd love to hear it. In the meantime, I'm going to keep working on it. I'm going to try and schedule time to be bored. I'm a delete some shit off my phone. And my next episode is going to be about some books that I've read in books. I want to read because reading is one of the hobbies I've had throughout my life. And it's one that I have still continued to do, even if I haven't always been great at making time for, and so I want to make sure to keep it first and foremost in my mind. So let me know on Instagram, don't forget to check out my Patreon www.patreon.com/cindyguentertbaldo. They are the sponsors of my podcasts and they're fucking awesome until next time, make some time for yourself and your hobbies. This. And I'll talk to you later. Peace out. | |||
| 03 Feb 2020 | Things I Don't Have Time For | #100 | 00:18:25 | |
In honor of both episode 100 (!!) and my 40th birthday, today's (tongue in cheek, meant to be kinda silly) episode is allll about things I don't have time for.
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Cindy Guentert-Baldo 4225 Solano Ave. #601 Napa, CA 94558
Inquiries - cindy@cindyguentertbaldo.com | |||
| 07 Oct 2019 | Some Thoughts On Planner Events | #78 | 00:35:30 | |
I’m back from my break with a Hot Gossip episode, this one talking about some of the stuff I’ve seen online about planner events recently! From influencers being assholes to why certain sponsors seem to be all over an event, here is the $0.02 no one asked for!
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Cindy Guentert-Baldo 4225 Solano Ave. #601 Napa, CA 94558
Inquiries - cindy@cindyguentertbaldo.com | |||
| 13 Mar 2020 | Am I A Realistic Optimist? | #108 | 00:04:40 | |
In today's quick hot take (actually recorded last week, but I brain farted) I talk about something I heard at the Chicago Planner Conference.
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Cindy Guentert-Baldo 4225 Solano Ave. #601 Napa, CA 94558
Inquiries - cindy@cindyguentertbaldo.com | |||
| 28 Feb 2022 | FAKING WELL | 151 | 00:22:14 | |
If you have an invisible illness, chances are at some point you've been accused of "faking it." What most people who don't have these types illnesses don't know is... we do fake it. We fake being WELL. • DISCLAIMER Colorful words may be used. don't be alarmed. • NEWSLETTER • Etsy Shop is open! • FIND ME ON ALL THE THINGS YouTube - https://youtube.com/c/CindyGuentertBaldo Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/llamaletters/ Discord - https://discord.gg/Rwpp7Ww Pinterest - https://www.pinterest.com/llamaletters/ Website - www.cindyguentertbaldo.com • STUFF I MENTIONED Inquiries - cindy@cindyguentertbaldo.com TRANSCRIPTIONSo the other day on Instagram, I was talking about, uh, the. The guilt that I feel when I'm having a not so great day and just want to take a personal day. But I feel like I can't because I have to take so many days when it comes to having a really bad chronic illness day. And one of you, Wendy messaged me on Instagram and asked me if I would do a podcast on fake. Well, chronic illness. People think you might be faking sick, but we're actually faking well. And she, I was like, oh fuck. Yeah, I hell I want to talk about that. So thank you, Wendy, for bringing that up to me because that's what we're gonna talk about today. Welcome to the uncurated life podcast. My name is Cindy Guentert-Baldo on this podcast. We talk about the way we live our lives, both in person and on the internet. And this is a major piece of it. If you are chronically ill. In one form or another, this could actually have to do with mental illness. This could have to do with physical illness or all sorts of different. For a little bit of context. I am in kidney failure. I have polycystic kidney disease. And so I have a lot of the problems that come with kidney failure, the nausea, the, um, the brain fog, the exhaustion, all of that, but also have massive football sized kidneys, and those add their own level of pain to my day, with the size of them pushing on my ribs, pushing them, my organs, I can't bend over. I can't tie my shoes, blah, blah, blah. I am in pain. Or uncomfortable or both every minute of the day. So very much I am, um, chronically ill, however, um, aside from some yellowness in my skin and my large kidney belly, which a lot of people just assume I'm pregnant. You can't see my illness on the surface. I'm not wearing it on my sleeve. The same goes for people with so many different invisible illnesses, whether it's fibromyalgia, whether it's Ehlers Danlos syndrome. And those just both come to mind because my kid is potentially diagnosed with one of those. We're still working on that, but there's all sorts of invisible physical illnesses that can cause pain. And that can make you feel like shit every day. The same goes for a lot of mental. Illnesses things that you're dealing with, like depression or chronic anxiety or all sorts of different things like that. There are so many things that afflict us and impact how we're doing on any given day that people on the outside, people who are not, uh, us basically, they can't see. It becomes a real feeling of stress, especially when people question you, if you're having a bad day, this happens. This happened a lot for me when I was working for, I worked for myself now, but when I was working for somebody else with coworkers, when I would need to take like a moment and people would question because they couldn't tell, it's not like I have a broken arm hanging from my side or something. So they would question me about whether or not it was faking, feeling shitty. I've seen this with my kid. They have run into problems with other people in their life who have questioned them on how they're feeling. Are they really feeling, is it really that bad? I know a lot of people in the chronic illness and chronic pain communities feel this way. I know, especially it can feel this way when you go to the doctor and you are asking for help or relief with your pain or looking for answers. And there are some amazing, amazing medical professionals out there, but there are also some who maybe did not pay. Empathy on their trip through medical school, especially if you're a woman, especially. And I've heard, like if you're a woman, if you're fat, if you are a person of color, your, your, like your concerns are not always taken as seriously at the doctor. If you have the nerve to go to a doctor about it at all. For me, one of my biggest issues is that I am in pain all of the time, and I very rarely have anything to help me with relief from the pain. Because of the stigma around pain management, pain management medication, and with the whole like opioid epidemic, I have an entire rant on how the opioid epidemic and all the situations with that. Some of the people impacted the most by it who don't get talked about the most are the chronic pain patients who. They have to spend their lives in misery because, um, of the way that like people are not being treated like criminals, if they need to, if they need pain management. So there is that all of this to say that it is very easy. If you are somebody who suffers with an invisible illness of any sort to be. Accused of either directly or indirectly a faking it, of faking your illness of exaggerating your illness of, of over-blowing your illness and what Wendy said to me. And what I really started to articulate to myself is that, yeah, I do fake it. I fake it a lot, but I don't fake being sick. I fake being well, here's the thing. When you are somebody who is dealing with chronic pain, chronic illness, you don't need to fake feeling like shit because you already do, but you may decide either purposefully or just subconsciously that it would serve you better to just put on the wellness facade. It's easier that. So I'm going to link several articles that I looked at in the show notes, because there's, there's other people. Who've also said this very succinctly, but I'm gonna just talk about some of the reasons I can think of about why and how I've faked being well, one of the biggest reasons. I'm fucking sick of talking about it. I'm sick of people asking me how I'm doing. I'm sick of having to explain. I'm sick of having to talk about it. I just want to be left to be miserable and peace. And if I present as miserable, people are going to ask me, they're going to be concerned. Maybe I just don't want to talk about it. That. So I fake it. The funny thing is my family's onto me. I can't fake it as well around them anymore. They know me well enough where they can see the changes in my body language. They can see the changes in my face. They can see it. Eyes. They could see it in how I carry myself. They can see it in the way that I move around them and the way that I just move in general, the way I walk, maybe even the clothes I decide to wear. They're very astute at picking up on the signs. Even if I'm trying to present like quote, everything's fine. They can tell. That I'm lying, especially Jessie, my husband. Oh my God. He can pick it out, like out of a fucking lineup, but generally speaking in other relationships. Yeah. I'll just, I'll fucking fake it because I don't want to deal with it anyway. I don't want to talk about it that day. It gets old, man. It gets old and it especially gets old. When you start to feel like that becomes your entire identity, like, look at me, I'm the sick person. And that may not be your entire identity to other people, but it can start to feel that way to yourself. So faking well to, just, to just not deal with it is most definitely something that I, I do like on a regular basis. Another way that I fake well is because I, I don't, there's this dichotomy that comes when you're sick. Right. You see this a lot, especially in like the cancer community, right. There's like the cancer warriors, the people who are like bravely facing on their cancer. And then there's. Like the super miserable sick people you hear about like when somebody is reaching the end of their life and they're just, they're miserable. So they're miserable to everybody else around them. So there's, there's these two kind of archetypes of a sick person. And in my experience, especially being chronically ill. Neither of those really sum up my experience on a day-to-day basis. I'm not a warrior, I'm not battling my illness. I'm, I'm just, I'm doing my best every single day. I don't want to be seen as the hero of my story because it's not that simple. I don't want to be put on a pedestal for it, but at the same time, I also don't want to be seen as like the miserable sick person and. It's hard to push back against those narratives. It's really difficult to push back. It's like pushing back against stereotypes. It can be really difficult. And when you're already exhausted and already in so much pain, it's easier to just sidestep the whole thing altogether. Like people, if I'm not having a bad day, Sickly wise, or if I'm putting on that, I'm not having a bad day sickly wise and it won't come up, then I don't have to deal with it. But as soon as it comes up, it becomes something I might have to deal with. And I just don't want to, most of the time, I don't have the fucking energy for that. Another reason one might fake being well is so that you can kind of. If people start feeling sorry for you because you're sick or they start questioning whether you're faking, being sick. It's a very short leap from that to questioning whether or not you're capable, whether or not you're competent, whether or not you are, you are capable of being like a fully formed adult. It's very easy to infant analyze somebody who's chronically ill. It's very easy to dismiss somebody. Who's chronically ill. It's very easy to other somebody who is chronically ill. And so by faking well, you're blending it. You're blending in with the well people you're blending in with the crowd, and you're not calling attention to any of these things. People don't make assumptions about your state of mind. If they don't know that you are in a haze of pain every day, people don't make assumptions about your state of mind. If they don't know that you have to take Trevor. Every day, people don't make assumptions about your state of mind. If they don't know that you are only putting half of your thought process forward, because the other half of it is dealing with not throwing up. Now, it's not a fair comparison to make because. Even when I was not in pain all the time, there were plenty of days where my thought process was divided and some of it was focused on the task at hand. And some of it was focused on my grocery list or some of it was focused on the drama going on at work, or some of it was focused on reliving last night's episode of flavor of love. Like it's not like chronic illness. People are the only ones who are distracted, but it can be very easy to question somebody's mental competence. If they have another situation going on, because if you are not, it, it, it fits you into this category of sick person rather than person. And, and it just, sometimes you just don't want to fucking deal with it. There's other. Times where one might fake. Well, because you're trying to go down like the fake it till you make it kind of kind of road. Like, well maybe if I fake feeling, well, maybe I've eventually will, you know, maybe if I ignore it long enough, I push it to the side long enough. Maybe I'll actually forget about it for a little while that never happens, but it can help with cheering yourself up. It can help with, with distracting yourself. There are ways we're putting on that kind of cloak of wellness. It can add at least like a superficial level of, I don't know, like peace and that sometimes I'll take it right. Sometimes I will take it a big piece of faking. Well, though, and probably for me at least is one of the biggest pieces is because. I don't want to be seen as the complaining sick person to my family, to my people around me, my friends, everyone else. I don't want to be seen as like the bummer. Right. I don't want people to distance themselves from me because they don't know what to say. I don't want people to distance themselves from me because they're tired of hearing about it. Like, I don't want like being sick, having this shitty genetic disease. Already sucks. I don't want it to be indirectly sucky by alienating people in my life now, whether or not that would actually happen. I don't know. But there is a lot of messaging out there that can at least make you feel that way. It can make you feel that if you are too vocal about your, your chronic illness, if you are, you are. Turning your frown super down on all the time that, that people are going to eventually distance themselves from you. There is messaging out there and it can be easy to internalize that a lot of people don't like being reminded, right? That, that humans, like if you're feeling healthy and everything else, and there's somebody, who's your age, who is struggling really hard with chronic pain or with illness, it can be a reminder of your own mortality and. And so that can cause people to even like, not consciously, but subconsciously distance themselves from you when you're sick. And so by pretending to feel better, you hope to insulate yourself from some of that. And one of the articles I read in the psychology today, article she talks about, um, The idea of the heroic sick person. So like if your illness, this goes back also to like the warrior thing, right. It goes back to the person they use, as the example is Beth from little women, right. She's dying. She meets it with acceptance. She meets it with bravery. She meets it with, with like being. Just accepting and okay with it. It's not icky. It's not stressful. There's no bed sores. Like you don't hear about any of that. You just hear about her bravely heading towards the valley of the shadow or whatever it is for that book a bunch. So that makes that make sense. But that's not usually what chronic illness really is like. And that's usually not what somebody who finally is at a point where they're going to be hospitalized. It's not what it's usually like, but this idea of like the, the idealized sick person, Barbara Hershey in beaches, dying of her woman's disease or whatever, right. When you see people in these movies dying of something, You know, getting cancer, getting whatever, and then they, they face it and they might have some problems facing it, but then they, they go through it like even a movie like step-mom with, um, with Susan Surandon it's a great example of somebody faking well, right. The movie step-mom was Susan Surandon and Julia Roberts is about a divorced couple at Harris is the husband and SU Susan saran. The mom and the dad had Harrison, Susan Sarandon and Susan surrounding gets diagnosed with cancer. And at Harris has a new girlfriend. Um, Nate who's Julia Roberts. And. Susan Sarandon's character. It kind of, it shows kind of two things. It shows the, the, the dynamics of a family dealing with a new step parent and the biological parent, having trouble relinquishing any sort of control to a step parent, blah, blah, blah, which I found fascinating as somebody who was in Susan Sarandon's place with my kids gain a stepmom, but then also. She's hiding her diagnosis from them. Cause she doesn't know how her family is going to handle it. She doesn't want people to see her as a sick person. She hides it for a good from her family for a good chunk of the movie to a point where they think that she's maybe moving to another state or she's having an affair or something like there's a lot happening there where she's faking being well. But then once people know about her being sick, there are some times where she's really snarky and not like accepting it. But for a lot of it, she's like the saintly dying mom. Right. And she's putting on this. This idea of being the, the heroic dying person for her kids, but it also shows through in the. There. There's not a lot of movies made about people who are absolutely like you also. Okay. Let me, let me just continue on this rambling note to mention that like the polar opposite of all of this is the memories that the character Rachel has in Salem's lot. Salem's lot, uh, pet. The character, Rachel and pet cemetery, the memories of her sister Zelda, dying of meningitis, and like the, the scary to a kid sister who is bedridden and on a bunch of drugs. And, and, you know, her room smells like urine because of the bed pan and everything else. I would argue that some of the depictions, not all of the patients have Zelda by far, not all of the fictions of depictions of Zelda, but I would suggest that there is a level of truth there because from everything I understand and from everything I have witnessed from people in my own life, There is a level at the end of a long drawn out illness, where somebody is dying from it, where it's not beautiful, like the movies it's, it's hard and it's stressful for everybody. There's a reason that long-term caregivers suffer from depression and suicidal thoughts and survivor's guilt and all of that. They feel guilty because they feel relieved. All of that, to say that when you hear about these things, when you see the dichotomy of like the heroic, saintly dying people in the movies, and then you hear about the reality of it and the things that caregivers have to go through when you yourself are chronically ill. You don't want to be seen as the saintly dying person, because it's not you, but you don't want to be a burden to the people that you love. And so one of the only ways you can kind of circumvent some of that is to just pretend to not feel so shitty. And so that's at least that's my perspective on it. So I guess what are the takeaway I want you to take from this podcast is if you are somebody who is chronically ill in whatever form it might be, and you fake being. For your own sake, just know that I understand because I do it too. You're not alone. And if you are somebody who is not chronically ill and you have someone in your life who is, first of all, take any assumptions you have, that somebody might be quote faking it when it comes to their pain and put it out the window because chances are, if you know somebody who is chronically ill, And you can see that they're in pain that day. Chances are they've been in pain every day and that day it's just excrutiatingly bad. I know that. That's what my husband actually has said as much to me that he knows that when I actually talk about how bad I'm feeling, it's like way worse, because I wasn't talking about how bad I was feeling before it got bad enough for me to talk about it. So just, just keep that in mind. What you see with the chronically ill person is often what's gotten bad enough for them to allow to the surface or where they can't hide it anymore. This is not the same for everybody. I'm not talking. This is not, you know, everybody's experiences are different, but I think that there can be between, I think the real stigma for chronically ill people is both the long time. Not listening to so many people when they talk about like the things that are wrong with them, as well as, uh, and I'm going just go back to it, but like the, with the opioid epidemic and the problems that it has had with things like pain management, it has become stigmatized to talk about being in chronic pain all the time, because people think you're just talking about it to get. And I just, I wanted to talk about this because I think that there are some of you in my audience who will resonate with this, and I want you to know you're not. I love to hear your thoughts on this topic. Let me know on Instagram at @llamaletters, or you can message me, uh, using my email. I check all the links out in the description or the show notes below. I hope you have a wonderful day. I hope that if you are somebody who is chronically ill in some form or another, that you have as good of a day as is possible for you. And I hope if you are not chronically ill, that I hope you have a great day as well. Make sure to thank my patrons. If you see any of them out on these streets, they make all these episodes possible. And if you are curious about being a patron yourself, you can go to www.patreon.com/cindyguentertbaldo to find out more. I really hope you all have a great week and until next time, my friends peace out. | |||
| 10 Jan 2022 | Is "Wellness" The New "Diet"? | 144 | 00:26:07 | |
It’s January, the biggest month of the year for diets… or is it “wellness” now?
Colorful words may be used. don't be alarmed.
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TRANSCRIPTIONHello, everybody. Welcome back to the uncurated life podcast. Before I even get into this episode, I wanted to give you a bit of a trigger warning for anybody who struggles with, talk about weight. Talk about dieting, talk about exercise, talk about disordered eating and all of that. I will be talking about my thoughts on how wellness and dieting seem to be.
Kind of interchanged with each other right now, is this all my own thoughts and my own experiences, but I know that for some people, this can be a conversation that can be really hard for them. So I'm just letting you know, upfront that if you need to skip this episode, no hard feelings. Totally understand.
But I wanted to say that upfront because I love you. Let's get going. Not that this is your first time here. My name is Cindy Guentert-Baldo this is kind of a heavy one to get started on, but it also kind of gives you an idea of sort of the, the different ways that this podcast kind of takes shape. I love to talk about how we live our lives on the internet.
And for me, that can show up in some sassy molassey and that can also show up in some kind of heavier conversations. And today's definitely going to be on the heavier side, but it is something that has been weighing on me quite a bit. Recently, no pun intended. And that is, is wellness. The new diet.
Imagine. Wellness and diet, both being in quotes. Now I had already had this thought and I will kind of talk about that a little bit in a hot minute here, but if you don't already listen to it, maintenance phase is a fantastic podcast where they dissect a lot of things around diet, culture and wellness culture, and it's fascinating.
And it has helped me really unpack some of the stuff that I have had ingrained in me for a long ass time. And. I think that if you haven't listened to it, I'll make sure to link it in the show notes. There talk about wellness and diet has been really instrumental for me in solidifying some of the thoughts I was already having.
Although I will also say that I don't have very solid thoughts on this. This is more of a stream of consciousness conversation that brings in my experiences and my thoughts on the subject. And this will be an ongoing conversation, I think, cause it's fascinating to me lately, especially as it pertains to myself, my body image.
And how some of those things can impact my kids. So I guess a good place to start is my history with dieting. I'm 42 years old. Well, I'm almost 42. I keep saying I'm 42, but I haven't quite turned 42 yet, but I'm getting there. I grew up in the eighties in the nineties. Dieting was everywhere, but it wasn't really something that was impressed upon me, partly because I grew.
In a fairly poor household. And there wasn't really any conversation about dieting because the conversation was often about. W what kind of food we were going to have for dinner? Like where are we going to have to go get the free government food? Or where are we going to have to get something on clearance at the grocery store that my mom was going to have to make stretch?
It, it wasn't like a, it wasn't a real conversation in our house. If my mom was into diet culture. Honestly, I don't remember it now. My sisters could totally contradict me on this. I also was a very self-absorbed teenager, especially, but I don't remember my mom being super into, into diet culture for one.
My mom, as a profession was a cook. She did was a kitchen manager at a restaurant at the cafeteria. She worked in various kitchens throughout her life and loved to cook. Unfortunately, when it came to our meals, she was burned out on cooking for the most part, and also trying to stretch a very, very meager budget when it came to our food.
But she wasn't afraid of. On top of that, my mom was a bigger lady. She was not skinny by any stretch of the means. She was a much a bigger person, but she seemed to have quite a bit, at least again, from my memory of a fairly good body image of herself, partly because my dad thought that she was just absolutely gorgeous and.
They may have fought like cats and dogs, but they also were high school sweethearts and super into each other. And so, again, from my perspective, I'm not speaking for my mom and my mom has passed away. So she can't really speak for herself anymore. But from what I remember observing. I didn't get a lot of my issues with food from my mom's specifically when I was in high school, I did have body image issues, but most of my body image issues were surrounded by the fact that I was six, two.
I grew a foot and a half in a year. And when you AE are super tall female and be. It's like the mid nineties and they haven't really started selling like long sizes and a lot of the super discount stores, which is all we could afford to shop at. I wound up having to do things like wear men's jeans because they were the only ones that weren't high waters on me.
So most of my body image issues that I remember were surrounded by, um, how tall I was not my weight. I honestly don't really remember being super. Annoyed by my weight in high school, what I will say. And again, this can go back to my self absorbed. Anise is that both of my sisters tended towards my mom's body shapes.
They were both are both larger than me. And maybe part of me was like, oh, well, I don't have to worry about that. Cause I'm skinnier than them, which is a shitty thing to say, but. I can totally see myself sort of internalizing that. I just don't remember any real issues that I had with body image that wasn't around, both my height and the fact that I have never been able to give my hair.
Like I didn't even know. Straight irons were like flat irons were a thing. I just thought people had naturally smooth hair and my shitty hair and my shitty teeth were just because I was poor. I found out later. Yeah, that is part of it because I couldn't afford the things to make them fancy, but it wasn't that fancy people, rich people just happen to be more fancy know they can afford the ways to be more fancy suffice it to say, I didn't start struggling with weight until I got.
It really started when I was in my first marriage. And some of it came from comments that my ex-husband made, that had to do with his standards for beauty. And they weren't about me being. Overweight. They were about me having smaller boobs basically. And I internalized a lot of that. I don't think he really knew when he told me those things, that that was going to impact me for years to come.
I think for him, he was just making an offhanded comment, but. For me, they did impact me for a long time. And the, and again, this goes back to a lot of what I've been thinking about lately, which is it's very easy for us to make offhanded comments. About ourselves, about other people that we don't think are a big deal, but there may be people overhearing what we're saying or that we're saying them to, whether it's our kids, whether it's other people in our lives, whatever the case may be.
And so what to us, does it seem a big deal because we've already internalized it or it just doesn't seem like a big deal to us. It could be really awful for somebody else. And that's just been something that I've been grappling with lately. Again, that particular comment did not make me really worry about my weight.
The worrying about my weight began when I was pregnant and it wasn't even when I was pregnant, my first pregnancy with cat, I went 41 weeks. I gained 70 pounds and when I had cat, cat was a little under 10 pounds. I was having a lot of trouble dropping the weight at first. And I wanted to, I wanted to just get back to my normal and believe me, my normal has Al was always at the time, like 180 pounds.
Again, I'm six, two. I wasn't ever expecting to be super, super skinny or anything. I just didn't want to be where I was at the time. So I went on weight Watchers for the first time. And this first round of WeightWatchers that I was on was successful for me. I wound up losing the majority of that weight and feeling really good about it.
I wasn't exercising all that much cause exercise and I have never been good friends with each other, but I was like just really counting calories and restricting the food I was eating and it worked. And then I got pregnant again. And this time with RJ. Because of various circumstances, which I can totally go into in another video.
A lot of it was my fault. Uh, we wound up, I wasn't working and we wound up having a lot of trouble, like with money in general, in the early days of my pregnancy with RJ, I wound up going without food for a week because I was so worried that we wouldn't have enough money for food and for gas to get me to the job I was going to.
And I ended up blacking out at my training. So. Suffice it to say that even when I started working again, I did not have either the time because I had a toddler or the disposable income to indulge all of my cravings. When I was pregnant with cat dude, I was all about the Wienerschnitzel, corn dogs and shit, or chili dogs, and shit like that.
But with RJ, I only gained 20 pounds. And then on top of that, he was almost 11 pounds when he was born. So that to me felt like, like triumphant, but I did again, try to go on weight Watchers to lose the weight a second time. And this time I struggled with it. However, I discovered that there was another way that one could lose weight.
Enter the time in my life. When I was below my goal weight, I was the skinniest I had ever been in my life. Not only that people were telling me how good I looked, I was also the most miserable I had ever been in my life. It was when things were really bad between my ex-husband and I, and I was a manager at trader Joe's and I was working 50 plus hours a week on a schedule where I barely saw my.
It was chain smoking. I was only eating basically goldfish, crackers and drinking. Coca-Cola. That was it. That was basically my life now. No, at this point, I didn't know I had polycystic kidney disease, but my blood pressure, it was only just then starting to skyrocket. Amazing. I can't imagine why. Right. But like, you could see my hips and I felt really, really like, like, like Zoolander would say really, really good looking, but I was utterly miserable.
This is a very self-destructive period of my life. I was drinking too much. All sorts of shit happened again. I might go into this more and more detail one day, but that's not the subject of this podcast.
The best weight I'd ever been in my life was the most unhealthy I'd ever been in my life. And yet I was still proud of myself for being that weight. And for a long time afterwards, once I had gotten out of that marriage, once Jesse and I had started dating and then living together and I put on like the happy, the happy weight, the weight that comes when one stops, one, quit smoking for one and is not like completely and utterly lost.
Depressed and just fucked up for that whole time. Yeah, I put on the weight, but I would keep idealizing this ideal of myself when I was a super skinny, but also really unhealthy. This was the first time it began to occur to me, but not in the front of my mind, in the back of my mind that it's not about how much you weigh when it comes to how healthy you are.
That doesn't mean that there can't be health problems that come with being. In the upper limits of weight and there's things that come with being in the lower ends of the weight spectrum or whatever. I'm not saying that, but what I am saying is that how much someone weighs is not necessarily an indicator of their health.
There are other indicators that are much more obvious making assumptions about someone's health based on their weight is foolish because that doesn't tell you anything. But at the time, I didn't quite think about that.
Now I was never a diet cycler, but in the years after I got together with Jess, I put back on weight because I had quit smoking cold Turkey right before we moved in together. And then. Generally speaking, I was much happier. So I was not like subsiding on crackers and soda anymore. There were times when I would return to my old favorite, the weight Watchers that I did, the whole 30, my kids will make jokes about that to this day, because they were like, mom, are you fucking kidding me?
I flirted with plenty of diets, but I didn't. Um, really go down the super high protein end of things. Mostly because again, knowing that I had kidney disease, that just seemed like a bad idea at the time. However, in the time of this timeframe, I began to notice certain wording around dieting coming from my diet fat free, you know, zero points kind of WeightWatchers lifestyle.
I began to notice with some of my friends. Th their wording was different, but it felt the same very specifically. It was around things like eating, clean, eating, lean, feeling, lean, feeling light, you know? Yeah, cleansing toxins. My first real exposure to this shit started happening. It was happening to me and a group of my friends and I immediately was like, what the fuck does that even mean?
It just sounds like diet talked. Clothed differently. And I had evidence of that fairly soon. I had a friend who blacked out from not eating enough in there eating lean phase or whatever. And so I was like, okay, this, this is kind of concerning me. But again, it didn't cause me to take a look at what I was trying to do.
Like, okay, this person is saying they want to eat clean and feel light. And I'm like, I'm kind of worried about you, man. But then I turn around and I'm like, how many? Zero point snacks can I get in today? Right.
So that all leads me to the most recent years where I've really, I've really kind of changed my thought process on all of it. One of the things that changed that thought process is having polycystic kidney disease. Literally because my kidneys are massive. They make me look pregnant and has taken me a long time.
I'm talking up until recent days where I can look at myself in the mirror and not completely hate the way I look. I recognize why I look the way I look and. I am trying real hard to love my body, but I think I've at least gotten to a point where I liked my body. I don't love the way it feels a lot at the time, but I also am at a point now there's nothing like fucking chronic kidney disease to let you know that when you eat something that your body doesn't like, your body lets you know, real quickly and that's where I'm at right now.
So it's a balance of how nauseated I am. Most of the time. And how certain things that I tend to go towards when I'm nauseated might make me feel like shit. Maybe because of my medications, maybe because of my kidney function, it depends on the thing, but it's, it's helped me work my way through it. I don't recommend this.
I don't recommend chronic genetic illness as a way to help you figure out your. Your issues with diet culture, plot twist, though, as I was starting to come to terms with my body, both how it felt and how it looked. I started to also notice at the same time that all of those things that were beginning to irk me years ago with my friends about eating clean and all of that, we're starting to take over the fucking world of dieting and so on and so forth.
Thanks to things like goop and all sorts of other shit. This idea of eating clean wellness, flushing your toxins, and. People talking about flushing, their toxins is one of the things that annoys the everliving shit out of me. If you have working kidneys, that's their job and your liver's job as somebody who does not have very well working kidneys when I need, when there comes a day, when I need to flush my toxins, that's done with dialysis.
So miss me with your fucking talks and flushing. Thank you very much. Moving forward. So noticing that, that eating clean the way that instead of talking about going on a diet, now, people were talking about improving their wellness and an eating clean and restricting carbs and whatever the case may be, it's they wouldn't say restricting, they would say I'm avoiding carbs or whatever.
The language softened, it felt a lot more like Gwenyth Paltrow, the way that you would talk about things. And then. I began to notice how I was talking about food around my kids.
When I talked about being bad, when it came to eating something, when I talked about. Having a cheat day or whatever. I didn't ever notice those things. But remember what I said before about comments that you think are not innocuous impacting people harder when one of your teenagers struggles with disordered eating, especially around avoiding and restricting foods.
You begin to recognize whenever that stuff starts to come out of your mouth and that began to happen for me. And so, even though I felt like I was coming to better terms with how I saw my body, I realized that I had a lot of the training retraining to do and how I talked about shit in general, because some of those things that to me were kind of throwaway comments.
We're impacting my kid in a way that was forming their opinions of themselves so that as they went into their life, they might change how they feel about certain things. Now that's kind of where I'm at now. So that gives you sort of the beginning to the, the current state of how I am feeling like I'm more at peace with my body.
Not at peace of the fact that my body is shutting down, but at peace with what I need to do in order to feel less shit. And not worry about the rest of it. That's where I'm at right now. Like currently I need to start reducing my salt according to my nephrologist. So that's something to think about, but not because I'm worried about being fat beat because I need to reduce salt for my blood pressure sake because I have kidney disease.
So I'm comfortable with where I'm at with my body. I mean, I'd be comfortable in my body, but that is reasons beyond my control. But what I am comfortable with is how I feel about my body. And I have hard days. But they're fewer than they used to be. But right now, currently, what I am worried about is my kids, not just the one, discover this, dealing with disordered eating, but both of them and the images they're taking into the world, as well as really thinking about like the things that are so deep inside of me, that I don't even notice them.
I want to remove as many landmines as possible, both for my kids and for myself. Anyway, now that we've talked about that, I want to talk about a few things that, that, um, are kind of at the forefront of my brain when it comes to this whole idea of wellness versus diet and how they're both just basically insidious.
One thing for me is the obsession with food. And this is something that my kid is working on, right. This obsession with eating the right foods. Which is now it's like, let's eat the clean foods. Let's eat the non, the non-toxic foods, whatever used to be let's eat the fat free foods or the no points foods or the no carbs foods or the low carbs foods or whatever the language has changed.
It used to be like, they would say like fat free or low fat or whatever, but now it's about eating clean. I keep coming back to that, but that's like eating clean and wellness are like fucking two sides of the same goddamn. I'm not saying eating less processed foods is terrible. It's a, it's fine. It's a good thing.
But when you start assigning morality to your food, that's when we start heading into trouble territory. Assigning some foods as good. And some foods is bad. Some foods as naughty in some foods is nice. Some foods is clean and some foods is dirty. That's assigning moral judgements to food that doesn't fucking exist.
It's just food. And believe me, when I say it is just a first world problem too, because if you think about it, If you really wanted to improve, people's eating. If you really wanted to improve public health, if you really wanted to improve all of these things, if it wasn't about beauty standards, if it was about real overall health that we would be working on things like bringing accessible food to food deserts.
Stopping equating obesity with health problems because really the health problems need to be addressed. The obesity is not the health problem. You can address it. If there's an issue that's causing like joint pain or whatever, but if you have health problems, doctors need to look at that first. And having access to things like open space, places for people to walk easily accessible things for people to do where they can move their body and making it so that moving your butt, like getting people, the clue that you just want to find a way to move your body, that you like, you don't have to punish yourself.
Exercise. Shouldn't be punishment. I'm getting on a tangent tangent here, tirade. I'm very sorry about that. I'm actually not very sorry about that, hashtag, sorry, not sorry. I will say that aside from my own management of changing my language around food and exercise and trying to remove the morality from food, the other things that really, really piss me off are a, the way that people make assumptions about.
Based on body size and that's gonna be an entirely different podcast. I can tell you from my own experience and from experience of my family members, the differences in ways one might get treated at the doctor's office based on how big you are, right? The way that you can't necessarily be diagnosed with an eating disorder.
If you aren't at a certain BMI, which excludes everybody, who's not at a super low BMI who also has disordered eating. And then of course, there's my anger at companies selling us. Now it's wellness culture used to be diet culture. Now it's wellness culture companies sell it to us because the way you sell something to someone, as you identify the problem, and then you sell them a way to fix it.
And so for company and wellness, dieting, all, that's a huge Indian. And so companies can make more money if they're selling a solutions to why we're fat solutions, to why we're unhealthy solutions, to help us with our wellness, as opposed to actually addressing the systemic things, donating money, or doing all the things advocating for government help for the.
Actually will cause society as a better as a whole to be more well, we're selling us this thing that makes us feel like, well, if we do this and we eat clean and we remove all of our toxins and blah-blah-blah, then, then we might get closer to Gwyneth Paltrow. You know, I don't know. This is a big rant. You guys, I don't even think this is as organized as I wanted it to be, but we go back to my central thesis.
Right? Is wellness the new diet? Yes. Yes, it is. I think that it feels like, and I got this from wellness, from wellness, from maintenance phase, they said something like, sometimes it feels like you just take a bunch of papers about, or like advertisements about diet and control F and replace all of the diet with wellness.
And there you go. It's the same fucking shit. And I'm not saying taking care of yourself, self care, that sort of thing is not important. But what I am saying is that companies. And gurus and people trying to make money off of us capitalism if they take diet, which is an extremely, extremely lucrative industry.
But it's starting to get a bad rap because dieting does not sound like the business in 2022. If they repackage it as wellness, suddenly people are willing to buy it again. I'm trying to be more discerning about that. And my hope is that if you struggle with this, that this might help you get a little bit of clarity towards being more discerning about it.
And I know this was ramble-y, this was all over the place, but I needed to get some of this off my chest. I will be re-exploring this topic more in upcoming days or upcoming months, whatever. But in the meantime, what I would love to know if you understood or agreed with any of this, let me know in Instagram stories, tag me at @llamaletters so I can see it share this podcast.
If that's interesting to you, I just I'd really like to know your thoughts anyway. Thanks to my patrons for sponsoring this episode. That's what they always do and the rad, and you can check it out at www.patreon.com/cindyguentertbaldo to find out more. Thank you so much for listening until next time, my friends peace out. | |||
| 20 Sep 2021 | 128 | Where I've Been/What To Expect | 00:26:10 | |
I’m back! In today’s episode I chat about where I have been during my podcast hiatus (LOTS OF STUFF MAN) as well as where this podcast may or may not be going.
Colorful words may be used. don't be alarmed.
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| 10 Jan 2020 | Body Image & The Gym | #93 | 00:04:41 | |
In today's still as yet unnamed Friday series of quick little bits in your ear, I'm baffled by some observations about myself and my latest gym experiences.
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