The Flop House (MaximumFun, Dan McCoy, Stuart Wellington, Elliott Kalan)

Just in time for MaxFun Drive, a little bonus for listeners.

As part of the MaxFun Great Switcheroo, Justin, Travis, Griffin, and Merle McElroy of The Adventure Zone have taken on Leprechaun: Origins. Meanwhile, if you want to hear the Original Peaches (plus guest star Zhubin Parang) you can find them playing D&D over at The Adventure Zone!

In honor of Elliott's long-lost blog critiquing the Oscars, and in honor of the Criterion Channel's recent "Razzie" collection, and in dishonor of the Razzies themselves, Dan guides the intrepid flop team through past winners of America's foremost bad movie awards, and why they're always wrong wrong wrong.

We partnered with StagePilot to film our SPEED 2 live show as a streaming event! The debut is Saturday, April 27th at 7PM ET, and the three hosts will be IN THE CHAT at that time, BUT THERE IS ALSO A VIEWING WINDOW — watch or rewatch any time between the debut and Sunday, May 19 at 11:59PM ET!

And if you happen to prefer your live shows really live, and happen to live in or near OXFORD, ENGLAND? We’ve got upcoming LIVE SHOWS for you!

Head to factormeals.com/flop50 and use code flop50 to get 50% off your first box plus 20% off your next box.

Get 20% Off and Free Shipping with the code FLOP at Manscaped.com

On this episode we uncharacteristically talk sports, specifically futbol, as we watched the definitely-not-about-a-corrupt-organization FIFA film, United Passions. And who better to join us as we wade into these unfamiliar waters than sports expert and Flop House nemesis, David Kalan.  Elliott introduces us to the American Bean Council mascot, Stuart coins an all-new word, Dan instructs you on sportsball Fisher Stevens cosplay, and David tells us a fascinating story about Executive Decision.

Movies recommended in this episode:

Shaolin SoccerSteve JobsThe Battered Bastards of BaseballBeasts of No NationSicarioBeau Geste

Hey remember those DeNiro and Stallone boxing movies you loved? This is also... a movie.

We talk about Grudge Match, the movie that pretends DeNiro has a chance against steroidal Stallone. Meanwhile Dan discusses Kevin Hart's need to do only Kevin-branded movies, Elliott uncovers Sean Connery's strange belief he's in every movie, and one of Stu's relatives makes an unexpected appearance. Movies recommended in this episode:The Set-UpUnder the SkinThe Raid 2

It's Smalltember Small-Stars, with a return to Frank D'Angelo, the Canadian energy drink magnate and bad movie savant behind No Depo$it. This time we discuss his undead Italian saga, Sicilian Vampire. Meanwhile Stuart is on about millennials, Dan poses a salient point about bananas, and Elliott is bound and determined to go through this movie beat-by-beat.

Wikipedia page for Sicilian Vampire

LIVE SHOWS

Oct. 8 – The whole gang in Los Angeles, at the Regent Theater

Oct. 21 - The whole gang in Toronto, at the Royal Theater

Dec. 9 – The whole gang in San Francisco, at the Marines Memorial Theater

We're gearing up for Max Fun Drive pretty soon (3/18-29), so as a reminder of why you love us so SO much, instead of a regularly-scheduled mini we're dropping ANOTHER full live episode from our recent west coast tour! This one was taped at the Aladdin in Portland, in front of one of the hottest crowds we've ever been blessed with, discussing one of the silliest movies we've ever discussed -- the Vanilla Ice starrer Cool As Ice!

Wikipedia page for Cool as Ice

Here's a special, (limited time) deal for our listeners. Right now get 50% off a ONE-TIME PAYMENT FOR A LIFETIME Babbel subscription - but only for our listeners - at Babbel.com/FLOP.

Bad news first: we discussed Dear David, a horror movie based on a Twitter thread posted by a guy who used to do comics for Buzzfeed, released by "Buzzfeed Studios" -- a sentence that gives us a headache just to type. The good news? We're joined by Star of the Show, Hallie Haglund, whose ever-delightful presence inspires us all into a lot of giggle fits and silly bits!

We’re in season 2 of FlopTV! Pop in for individual episodes, or get a price break with a season pass! Peruse the full line-up and/or get tickets here! And hey, while you’re clicking on stuff, why not subscribe to our NEWSLETTER, “Flop Secrets?!”

Wikipedia page for Dear David

Recommended in this episode:

Flesh Eater (1988)

His Three Daughters (2023)

The Girl on the Broomstick (1972)

Scenes from a Marriage (1947)

Head to factormeals.com/flop50 and use code flop50 to get 50% off your first box and 20% off your next month.

This special network wide event is a celebration of The MaxFunDrive! If you’d like to support podcasts you love for just $5 a month and get bonus gifts in the process, go to maximumfun.org/join. 

We’re kicking off the most exciting time of the year for the MaxFun Network with a trivia game show featuring hosts from tons of great podcasts.

J. Keith van Straaten and Helen Hong from “Go Fact Yourself” are joined by:

Jackie Kashian -“The Jackie and Laurie Show” 

Jeremy Bent -“Eurovangelists” 

John Moe

 - “Depresh Mode with John Moe” and “Sleeping With Celebrities”

and y'all in the Flop House feed know Dan already!

Elliott asks us a simple, but nearly impossible question -- which films best represent each month in the calendar year? The answers are predictably chaotic.

FlopTV is going strong! You can pop in for individual episodes, or get a price break with a season pass — more info (including the full line-up) and tickets available here! And hey, while you’re clicking on stuff, why not subscribe to our NEWSLETTER, “Flop Secrets?!”

Dan's surgery kept him from writing up detailed show notes, which is lame, we know. But come on. Between that and Oogieloves, hasn't he suffered enough?

Get tickets for our streaming show where the 3 of us and HALLIE HAGLUND discuss Three Men and a Baby! 

https://www.stagepilot.com/baby

Subscribe to our NEWSLETTER!

https://www.flophousepodcast.com/2024/06/subscribe-to-our-newsletter/

The thrilling conclusion of our definitive action hero rankings, as determined by Stuart's totally scientific, non-bullshit method!

We’re in season 2 of FlopTV! Tune in for individual episodes, or get a price break with a season pass! Full line-up/tickets here! And while you’re clicking on stuff, subscribe to our NEWSLETTER, “Flop Secrets!”

For a limited time, visit AuraFrames.com and get $45 off Aura’s best-selling Carver Mat frames by using promo code FLOP at checkout.

Head to factormeals.com/flop50 and use code flop50 to get 50% off your first box and 20% off your next month.

Because they haven't gotten around to a gritty Saved by the Bell reboot, we discuss Power Rangers. Meanwhile, Elliott gives us the local news report, Stuart calls Elliott to task for the laziness of his impressions, and Dan inadvertently says the grossest thing that's ever been on the show.

Wikipedia synopsis for Power Rangers

Movies recommended in this episode

You Were Never Really Here It Comes at Night Private Parts

We're taking a very brief summer break from new recording, and taking the opportunity to release one that we've been holding on to for too long -- Jurassic World: Fallen Kingdom. Recorded at Stuart and Dan's very own alma mater, Earlham College, in Richmond, Indiana!

Wikipedia summary for Jurassic World: Fallen Kingdom

LIVE SHOW DATES 2019!

September 28 – BOSTON – WBUR CitySpace (early show SOLD OUT, but there are still tickets to the later show!)

October 12 – LOS ANGELES – The Regent Theater

0:00 - 0:37 - Introduction and theme.0:38 - 3:57 - Some talk of Dan's stubble and much talk of his national TV debut3:58 - 32:45 - A discussion of A Thousand Words, the movie that we assume resulted from Eddie Murphy not wanting to learn a lot of lines.32:46 - 35:53 - Final judgments35:54 - 51:50 - Flop House Movie Mailbag51:51 - 1:01:52 - The most interrupt-y sad bastards recommend ever!. 1:01:53 - 1:04:25 - Goodbyes, theme, and outtakes.

0:00 - 0:39 - SEXY Introduction and theme0:40 - 3:27 - We work ourselves up into discussing the movie with some of our usual gibberish.0:28 - 36:41- Cuddle up tight with your loved one and share your most romantic pair of earbuds for this discussion of Valentine's Day.36:42 - 39:37- Final judgments39:38 - 52:41 - An epic Flop House Movie Mailbag52:42 - 57:33- The sad bastards recommend 57:34 - 59:25 - Goodbyes, theme, and outtakes.

Smalltember (Smallvember) begins with a return appearance by the Flop House's favorite (insomuch as a terrible asshole can be a favorite) Canadian energy drink magnate-turned-filmmaker, Frank D'angelo, and his latest cinematic leavings, The Joke Thief. Meanwhile, Stuart reveals his love for all things Stu, Dan gives a few minor script notes, and Elliott's Nicholas Cage has snakes on the brain.

You know? Honestly the Wikipedia page for this movie has almost no information.

Movies recommended in this episode:

Satanic Panic

Always Shine

Tea With the Dames

LIVE SHOW DATES 2019!

September 28 – BOSTON – WBUR CitySpace (early show SOLD OUT, but there are still tickets to the later show!)

October 12 – LOS ANGELES – The Regent Theater

We attempt to exploit the zeitgeist by... reviewing a movie from 1969. We may not be good at this zeitgeist thing. More to the point -- since Disney+ has been in the news, we attempt to bask in some reflected glory by talking about the young Kurt Russell Disney live-action vehicle, The Computer Wore Tennis Shoes (thanks to longtime Daily Show producer and head researcher Adam Chodikoff for the idea). Meanwhile Stu makes the fatal error of encouraging Elliott's singing, Elliott takes us inside the pitch meetings for our favorite cereal mascots, and Dan has the plague.

We discuss something that's been on our want list for a while: the genre-hopping bonkers twist-em-up, Serenity. And to do so, we are joined by the delightful Jenny Jaffe, whose attachment to this film can surely be described as "healthy." Meanwhile Stuart explains costume-care in the stripper industry, Elliott introduces his new hit character "Crawdaddy," and Dan's reaction to the film is a real twist ending!

Wikipedia synopsis for Serenity

Movies recommended in this episode:

John Wick 3: Parabellum

Long Shot

Alice in the Cities

Police Story/Police Story 2

LIVE SHOW DATES 2019!

June 8 – PORTLAND – Revolution Hall - TICKET SALES ARE SLUGGISH, SO PLEASE COME OUT!

July 13 – MINNEAPOLIS – Parkway

September 28 – BOSTON – WBUR CitySpace (TWO shows in one night)

October 12 – LOS ANGELES – The Regent Theater

No show notes because Dan is busy nursing a sick cat.

If we have Glen Weldon, co-host of the Pop Culture Happy Hour podcast and author of the marvelous Superman: The Unauthorized Biography on as a guest, you'd better believe we're gonna go down one of the many fascinating cul-de-sacs in the "super" cinematic universe -- in this case 1984's "Supergirl," or -- as we prefer to think about it -- The Adventures of Faye Dunaway's Fabulous Witch and Her Companions.

Wikipedia entry for Supergirl.

Movies recommended in this episode:

Saint Maud

Synchronic

Daisies

The Ruling Class

Elliott, mega-sporto that he is, challenges Stuart and Dan to see who's the number one sports movie fan.

Donate to the Entertainment Community Fund here, to support those affected by the WGA strike, if you’re so inclined.

We're currently on the road for our L.A. live shows, so the notes for this Shocktober week are a little abbreviated -- we watched Friday the 13th, Part VIII -- Jason Takes Manhattan!

Check out our season of streaming shows, FLOP TV!

If you want to help out crew members and others affected by the SAG/AFTRA strike, you can Donate to the Entertainment Community Fund here.

The Wikipedia page for Jason Takes Manhattan

Recommended in this episode:

Alien: Resurrection (1997)

The Blackening (2022)

Ravenous (1999)

To get our exclusive discount off your NordVPN plan + 4 months for free- go to https://nordvpn.com/flophouse - It’s completely risk free with Nord’s 30 day money-back guarantee!"

Look, it was probably inevitable that we'd end up discussing Zack Snyder's Justice League, and we'll say this -- it is certainly the most Zack Snyder-y Justice League we've ever seen (check out of our discussion of the theatrical cut here). In fact, it's SO Zach Snyder-y that it's four hours long... so we've split our ZSJL episode in TWO! That's double the discussion of this already over-discussed movie. YOU'RE WELCOME, WORLD!

Wikipedia entry for Zack Snyder's Justice League.

Movies recommended in this episode:

Doppelganger

Sneakers

Silver Lode

Stuart's been hard at work running more Hogsbottom Three RPGs for Elliott, Stuart, and Flop House favorite guest host Zhubin Parang. Here's a little taste of the first episode of their new adventure!

They're only available on the Maximum Fun bonus feed, exclusive for donors, so if you want this, and other wonderful bonus content from all the Max Fun shows, please become a member!

Thanks to Alexander Smith for editing the episodes, putting together the sound effects, and composing the music.

Hoo boy does Johnny Depp certainly have a mustache in Mortdcai!  Meanwhile Dan reads copy off a beer for some reason, Elliott invites George Lucas to stop by, and Stuart recommends a surprising film.Movies recommended in this episode:Mad Max: Fury RoadNeed for SpeedStuart Wellington mystery recommendation

You've heard about Santa, but have you heard about SANTA WITH MUSCLES? No? Well, that's probably for the best, but we discuss it anyway, with the aid of our ace Christmas correspondent, Mr. Alonso Duralde, who's become a holiday tradition around these parts.

Want to see our faces? Check out our season of streaming shows, FLOP TV, or get tickets for a stop on our January 2024 West Coast Tour.

Wikipedia page for Santa with Muscles

Recommended in this episode:

The Most Wonderful Time of the Year (2008) (For fans of cheesy Xmas movies)

Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles: Mutant Mayhem (2023)

When Evil Lurks (2023)

The Holdovers (2023)

Godzilla Minus One (2023)

L'immensità (2022)

Head to FACTORMEALS.com/flop50 and use code flop50 to get 50% off.

Is your cat food giving back to cats in need?  Smalls is, so if you want to give Smalls a try and ditch kibble forever, head to Smalls.com/FLOP and use promo code FLOP at checkout for 50% off your first order PLUS free shipping!

When last we left our doggie heroes, they had made their way inside the house, and thus far managed to protect the adorable kitten, Cutiepie -- but they STILL haven't scored any of that delicious chili, and their antics continue to threaten the farmer's daughter's wedding day. What will happen?!? Give a listen and see!

(If you want to listen to the previous FlopTales RPG adventures, consider becoming a MaxFun member, and checking out the bonus feed!)

Yes, Elliott, it should be called I, Frankenstein's Monster, but that doesn't change the fact that we watched I, Frankenstein. Meanwhile Elliott reveals the secret sex fetishes of Archie Comics characters, we learn Stuart's nicknames, and Dan asks the big metaphysical questions.Movies recommended in this episode:The GrannyThe Wages of FearDeceptive Practice: The Mysteries and Mentors of Ricky JayWhat's the Matter With Helen?

Will the guys who liked Speed Racer also enjoy the Wachowski sibling's most recent critical flop, Jupiter Ascending? Meanwhile Elliott debuts his new bumper sticker, Dan boringly digresses about The Three Investigators, and Stuart explains why, when incarcerating someone, you should really take their rocket boots.Movies recommended in this episode:CreepFlash GordonBarbarellaThe Visitor

0:00 - 0:33 - Introduction and theme.0:35 - 40:59 - When we were paperboys, we remember a lot less rough sex.41:00 - 42:38 - Final judgments42:29 - 54:32 - Flop House Movie Mailbag54:33 - 1:03:00 - The sad bastards recommend. 1:03:01 - 1:06:55 - The gang's an asshole to Dan, goodbyes, theme, and outtakes.

0:00 - 0:36 - Introduction and theme.0:37 - 5:37 - We discuss In Time's "Olivia Wildegate" scandal5:38 - 34:34 - The Three Musketeers has inspired at least twenty full-length film adaptations and many more sequels, shorts, and cartoons. It is timeless tale, impossible to ruin. This film does its damnedest.  34:35 - 38:19 - Final judgements38:20 - 51:20 - Flop House Movie Mailbag51:21 - 1:00:09  - Our longest recommendations in a while1:00:10 - 1:03:00 - Plugs, theme, and outtakes.

We discuss a movie from last year that flopped so badly that Elliott refuses to believe it exists: Max Steel. Meanwhile Dan sings a Carmen Sandiego duet, Stuart gives his fish-based SNL audition, and Elliott texts a lot.

Wikipedia synopsis for Max Steel

Movies recommended in this episode:

The Neon Demon The Devils The Lobster

Han Solo vs. Commissioner Gordon sounds awesome, until you realize the star of Paranoia is actually a Hemsworth brother. And not the good one. Meanwhile Elliott doubles down on the size of Gary Oldman's penis, Stuart disturbs us by talking about intimate times and Dan introduces the notion of a California Raisins fetish. A note: in this episode Dan confuses Baba Yaga with Strega Nona. Movies recommended in this episode:The Grand Budapest HotelThe VisitorThe Sweet Smell of Success

0:00 - 0:36 - Introduction and theme.0:37 - 33:57 - It's not much of a Ghost Rider movie, but at least it has spirit.33:58 - 38:55 - A recap supercut, followed by Final judgments38:56 - 53:35 - Flop House Movie Mailbag53:36 - 1:00:35 - The sad bastards recommend. 1:00:36 - 1:02:21 - Goodbyes, theme, and outtakes.

We dig into our vaults to bring you this live The Great Wall episode, from the Philly Podcast Festival!

Wikipedia synopsis for The Great Wall

0:00 - 0:37 - Introduction and SHOCKTOBER theme.0:38 - 8:47 - We spend nearly ten minutes introducing our special guest Federico Hatoum, and explaining why we've been M.I.A. for over a month.8:48 - 28:49 - We talk about Blood: The Last Vampire. .. or, more accurately, "CG Blood: The Last Vampire."29:50- 34:36- Final judgments34:37 - 47:54 - PLUGS! which eventually devolve into a series of mouth-sounds.47:55 - 58:52- The sad bastards recommend. 58:53 - 1:00:12 - Goodbyes, theme, and outtakes.

It's exactly what it says in the title. What could possibly be clearer?

Donate to the Entertainment Community Fund here, to support those affected by the WGA strike, if you’re so inclined.

Ever tried Microdosing? Visit Microdose.com and use FLOP for 30% off + Free Shipping.

Why is Bruce Willis starring in an NRA recruitment video? Wait, this is a MOVIE? Are you sure? We talk about Death Wish. Meanwhile, Elliott writes the horror movie "Dr. Sleepypants," we get insight into Stu's endless Critters gifs, and Dan shows off his kaleidoscopic character work, during pie talk.

Wikipedia synopsis for Death Wish

Movies recommended in this episode:

The Old Man & the Gun A Star is Born Shirkers

LIVE SHOWS:

The Flop House in Madison, WI on 1/26

Zhubin Parang joins us for the fourth most magical time on the Flop House calandar: Cagemas in July! It's also time for the political conventions, so more extensive show notes are canceled while Dan jets off to Cleveland and Philly.

Remember that surprisingly well-defined contest Elliott spearheaded a few episodes back? Well the contest winner decided what we should watch, and it was Interview with the Vampire. Will we fall victim to its bloodsucking charms? Meanwhile, Elliott apologizes to goths, Stuart lists a few Ecks vs. Sever sequels, and Dan disputes the very premise of the movie.

Wikipedia synopsis for Interview with the Vampire

Movies recommended in this episode:

First Man The Night Comes for Us Save the Tiger

With John Wick 3 tearing up the theaters, we discuss this year's OTHER Keanu Reeves movie, Replicas. Meanwhile Dan repeats an old adage about beans, Stuart can't pronounce "Keanu," and Elliott's son really messes up our rhythm.

Wikipedia synopsis for Replicas

Movies recommended in this episode:J

Booksmart

Avengement

Cold War

LIVE SHOW DATES 2019!

June 8 – PORTLAND – Revolution Hall – TICKET SALES ARE SLUGGISH, SO PLEASE COME OUT!

July 13 – MINNEAPOLIS – Parkway

September 28 – BOSTON – WBUR CitySpace (TWO shows in one night)

October 12 – LOS ANGELES – The Regent Theater

Stuart tries to explain JoJo's Bizarre Adventure to Dan and Elliott. Are they more confused afterward than they were at the beginning? Perhaps!

Thank you to Policygenius for their sponsorship.

Some of the top bits and tangents from the first 75 episodes, suggested by fans. Apologies for the sound quality on some of these -- it was early on and we were learning.

0:00 - 0:53 - Red carpet introduction0:54 - 35:51 - In contrast to EVERYONE ON THE INTERNET and our usual tendency to hate on things, we actually didn't mind the Oscars. 35:52 - 45:25 - Flop House Movie Mailbag45:26 - 48:20- A brief pledge drive48:21 - 55:56 - Dan tells the greatest story in American letters. Suck it, Twain and Hemmingway.55:57 - 59:47 - Plugs, goodbyes, theme, and outtakes.

Weirdly, a constantly-wisecracking Ryan Reynolds isn't less irritating when you add a child version of him making the same smug jokes. Are Netflix's widely-reported woes because they churn out dreck like The Adam Project? The world may never know!

Wikipedia entry for The Adam Project

Movies recommended in this episode:

Everything Everywhere All at Once

Akira

Fighting Elegy

In which Dan's premise is very silly.

Ever tried Microdosing? Visit Microdose.com and use FLOP for 30% off + Free Shipping.

It's that time of year again! Smalltember (or Smallvember, if you're nasty)! For our kickoff "smaller" bad movie pick, we took a recommendation from our podcast network colleague, the esteemed Mr. Justin McElroy, and watched Dangerous Game: The Legacy Murders, starring Flop House recurring offender, Jon Voight. It's a mashup of Clue and Saw that takes a turn you will not be expecting with those reference points. Take a listen, and unravel the mystery!

FlopTV is going strong! You can pop in for individual episodes, or get a price break with a season pass — more info (including the full line-up of films discussed) and tickets are available here! And hey, while you’re clicking on stuff, why not subscribe to our NEWSLETTER, “Flop Secrets?!”

This film has no Wikipedia page. Perhaps you can be the change you want to see in the world.

Recommended in this episode:

So Close (2002)

Rebel Ridge (2024)

Celine and Julie Go Boating (1974)

Go to Squarespace.com for a free trial, and when you’re ready to launch, go to https://www.squarespace.com/FLOP  to save 10% off your first purchase of a website or domain.

Dan briefly confuses everybody with talk about Garfield, before steering the boys into a discussion of their birthday twins, and related films. (Just listen. It'll make sense. Eventually.)

Check out Howell Dawdy (aka Producer Alex)’s new album!

It's the Flop House crew vs. the Dream Team in an all-out dance/bad movie fight to the finish, as we discuss Battle of the Year. Meanwhile, Stu challenges our missing co-host for synopsis supremacy, Dan discusses Vincent Van Gogh's battle with his own body, and Hallie drops the world's best rooster pun.

We close out Smalltember with one of our "favorite" genres: the ill-conceived, micro-budgeted computer animated film. And Dwegons and Leprechauns is a horrific, fever dream of a doozy. Meanwhile, Dan remains the master of the unintended double entendre, Stuart ponders what "dweg" means, and Elliott insists we kill a Muppet.

No Wikipedia page for Dwegons and Leprechauns, as if someone is working to WIPE ALL EVIDENCE OF THIS MOVIE FROM EXISTENCE. (God bless them.)

Movies recommended in this episode

BlackkKlansman Mandy Tampopo

LIVE SHOWS:

The Flop House in Richmond, IN on 11/3

The Flop House in Madison, WI on 1/26

From the dawn of time, humankind has dreamed of watching a giant lizard wrestle a big ape. Well, now humankind has Godzilla vs. Kong. Did it live up to our dreams? We enlisted the creator of Kaijumax, Zander Cannon, to help untangle our thoughts, as we spin along on this hollow Earth.

BTW: we know we promised you the Dark Phoenix live episode on our Twitter and IG, but technical issues stood in the way (those technical issues are that Dan somehow lost the file). In the unlikely event anyone has a recording or a bootleg, get in touch!

Wikipedia entry for Godzilla vs. Kong.

Movies recommended in this episode:

The Wolf House

Butcher, Baker, Nightmare Maker

Shin Godzilla

King Kong Escapes

A Colt is My Passport

No movie has sexualized pastry so much since American Pie, yet somehow Labor Day is even less erotic than Jason Biggs balls-deep in apple filling. Meanwhile Stuart does some brilliant voice work, Dan loves the versatility of DVDs, and Elliott regales the world with Tales of Ruck.Movies recommended in this episode:The Crazies (1973)The Crazies (2010)Edge of TomorrowAlan Partridge

0:00 - 0:33 - Introduction and theme.0:34 - 34:00 - We discuss The Academy of Motion Picture Arts and Sciences' top honor. You know, the one they entrusted to Billy Crystal.34:01 - 44:29 - We bestow the most coveted of all awards: The Floppies.44:30 - 1:00:02 - Flop House Movie Mailbag1:00:03 - 1:07:40  - Some year-end recommendations from 20111:07:41 - 1:10:02 - Plugs, theme, and outtakes.

Hello everyone. We did The Country Bears. For you. THE COUNTRY BEARS. For YOU. It's PURE JOY. Pure joy for MAX FUN DRIVE 2021. If you have the inclination and the means, please become a member at maximumfun.org/join! We love you, listeners!

Wikipedia entry for The Country Bears.

Movies recommended in this episode:

The Joining Max Fun Movie 2021

Is Seventh Son seventh fun? Perhaps, though we're not sure what "seventh fun" means. Meanwhile, Elliott pitches us on FXXX, Stuart expresses his love for fantasy bullshit maps, and Dan feels terrible about mixing up En Vogue and TLC.

We also debut Jonathan Biegen's "That's How it Works (feat. The Flop House)." And a warning for sensitive listeners -- we briefly get serious during the letters section with some talk about suicide.

Movies recommended in this episode:

Close RangeDiary of a Teenage GirlMiddle of Nowhere

It's Jason Statham and a giant shark. Whaddaya need, a roadmap? We discuss The Meg. Meanwhile, Dan reveals a surprising science fact about Meg Ryan, Elliott reveals that Swamp Thing is the ideal male body, and Stuart's feet have a surprising superpower.

Wikipedia synopsis for The Meg

Movies recommended in this episode:

Easy Living Rust Creek Can You Ever Forgive Me

0:00 - 0:29- Introduction and theme.0:30 - 2:12 - We re-introduce guest host Zhubin Parang2:14 - 36:55 - Hey look everyone! It's a dopey thing that people have based their whole philosophy on.36:56 - 40:34 - Final judgments40:35 - 56:46 - Flop House Movie Mailbag50:18 - 1:01:13 - The sad bastards recommend1:01:14 - 1:02:49 - Goodbyes, theme, and outtakes

Shocktober continues! On this episode we discuss the Flatliners-esque Lazarus Effect. More specific shownotes canceled on account of Dan's sick.

Wikipedia synopsis for The Lazarus Effect

Movies recommended in this episode:

Viy Pet Sematary The Shallows Shin Godzilla

We discuss The Last Witch Hunter. All other witch hunters presumably having been herded into the sea by the Red Bull. Meanwhile Meanwhile Elliott explains man-witches, Dan looks to an extreme James Bond to save a wounded nation, and Stuart is obsessed with billiards.

Wikipedia synopsis for The Last Witch Hunter

Movies recommended in this episode:

Help Session 9 I Married a Witch

It's the moment that the bad movie cognoscenti have been waiting for, as we discuss The Boy Next Door. Meanwhile, Stuart explains the "character" he plays, Dan becomes a proponent of the female gaze, and Elliott describes some of the lesser-known sexually explicit Disney cartoons of the 60's.Movies recommended in this episode:CitizenfourFaultsIt Follows

Stuart runs us through some of those tantalizing, teasing trailers.

Streaming TICKETS for THE FLOP HOUSE BATTLES BATTLEFIELD EARTH still available!

Here's a playlist of all the trailers we discuss in this episode!

Ever tried Microdosing? Visit Microdose.com and use FLOP for 30% off + Free Shipping.

Stuart invites Elliott and Dan onto The Peach Pit After Dark, an after show discussing the popular Flop House after show "The Peach Pit"

Ever tried Microdosing? Visit Microdose.com and use FLOP for 30% off + Free Shipping.

On this episode we run through a tasting menu of Bradley Cooper's assholish behavior in the bad-boy chef movie, Burnt. Meanwhile, Elliott recites some lewd Dr. Seuss, Stuart drops some Friday the 13th science, and Dan suggests a new sort of nativity.

Movies recommended in this episode:

His Girl FridayMcCabe and Mrs. Miller The Tin Drum

Our pals John Hodgman and David Rees have an animated show called Dicktown, about an aging boy detective and his aging bully/partner, premiering on FXX's "Cake" on July 9. Thus, in a completely generous, non-promotional gesture, they dropped by to discuss private detectives in movies, and in fiction generally.

From the visionary mind of John Krasinski, Stuart's number one favorite human, comes IF! It's a whimsical tale about how imaginary friends are real and we should have them even as adults, and if we decide to forget them, they'll die or something! Did this sit well with us? Probably not! But it led to one of our best live shows ever, so we hope you enjoy our pain.

Season 2 of FlopTV kicks off NEXT WEEK, and tickets are available here! You can pop in for individual episodes, or get a price break with a season pass — more info (including the full line-up). And hey, while you’re clicking on stuff, why not subscribe to our NEWSLETTER, “Flop Secrets?!”

Wikipedia page for IF

Go to Squarespace.com for a free trial, and when you’re ready to launch, go to https://www.squarespace.com/FLOP  to save 10% off your first purchase of a website or domain.

We discuss Borderlands, a video game movie that got delayed for several years, with extensive reshoots where an uncredited director took over for Eli Roth -- but it's probably okay, right? It's not like that sentence has at least five red flags in it...

We’re in season 2 of FlopTV! Pop in for individual episodes, or get a price break with a season pass! Peruse the full line-up and/or get tickets here! And hey, while you’re clicking on stuff, why not subscribe to our NEWSLETTER, “Flop Secrets?!”

Wikipedia page for Borderlands

Recommended in this episode:

Dan: Drive (1997)

Stu: Queer (2024)

Elliott: Wallace & Gromit: Vengeance Most Fowl (2024)

Go to Squarespace.com/FLOP to save 10% off your first purchase of a website or domain.

Head to factormeals.com/50flop and use code 50flop to get 50% off your first box plus free shipping.

We continue to exploit our vault of unreleased live shows, with this discussion of The Dark Tower, with special additional guest co-host, Hallie Haglund, the star of the show. And for those who don't dig live shows, good news! Since next week is Max Fun Drive, we'll be releasing an EXTRA EPISODE during a week we'd normally be dark. Everyone wins!

Wikipedia synopsis for The Dark Tower

LIVE SHOW DATES 2019!

June 8 - PORTLAND - Revolution Hall

July 13 - MINNEAPOLIS - Parkway

September 28 - BOSTON - WBUR CitySpace (TWO shows in one night)

October 12 - LOS ANGELES - The Regent Theater

Yeah, but what if the mutants... were NEW? Hello from the Magic Tavern's Arnie Niekamp joins the Peaches to talk about the long-anticipated, long-troubled, X-Men universe teen horror movie, The New Mutants!

PLEASE NOTE! The audio at the beginning of the episode is pretty bad, due to technical problems that had our guest's audio dropping out occasionally, but it DOES clear up fairly quickly, so please bear with us.

Also, we’re doing a new Flop House VIRTUAL LIVE SHOW! On Saturday, February 6th, at 9 pm Eastern, we’ll be talking about TEEN WOLF, America’s top basketball movie! We’ll also be doing presentations, Q&A, and a few NEW SURPRISES! Worried that you CAN’T WATCH LIVE? Worry not! Ticket holders have a week to watch! Just $10 for a ticket! Buy them HERE!

Wikipedia entry for The New Mutants

Movies recommended in this episode:

Psycho Goreman

One Night in Miami

The Queen

The January Man, first five minutes of

We're having an absolutely legendary Smalltember. First we covered The Legend of the Titanic, and now we're looking into The Legend of the Roller Blade Seven. Apparently they're legendary, but forgive us for being unfamiliar until now. It was made using a system RB7 star/co-writer/producer Scott Shaw dubbed "Zen Filmmaking." According to his wiki, this is a "style of filmmaking where no screenplay and scripts are used in the creation of a movie." We'll see if getting zen delivers a good movie, or whether it's better to... y'know... write things out and plan them ahead of time.

If you live in Los Angeles, you can get tix for your choice of TWO live shows at Vidiots on 10/19. And if you prefer watching us from the comfort of home, check out more info about our season of streaming shows, FLOP TV!

Due to the ongoing WGA – SAG/AFTRA strikes, we’re hitting pause on current releases, and focusing on some films 90’s kids might remember. If you want to help out crew members and others supported by the entertainment strikes, you can Donate to the Entertainment Community Fund here.

The Wikipedia page for The Roller Blade Seven

Recommended in this episode:

The Dark Backward (1991)

Root (board game)

American Boy (1978)

Ever tried Microdosing? Visit Microdose.com and use FLOP for 30% off + Free Shipping.

Here we are in No-vember, best known for having "no" theme. And we kick the month off with one of the most star-studded movies that absolutely made no cultural footprint whatsoever that you could hope to see -- Breaking News in Yuba County.

Wikipedia entry for Breaking News in Yuba County

Movies recommended in this episode:

Primal Rage

Titane

New York Ninja

Dear Comrades

0:00 - 0:31- Introduction and theme.0:32 - 2:15 - Stu talks Puerto Rico and celebrity beefs  2:16 - 36:29 - 'Allo 'allo, it's me, Danyul Craig, wot's all these Cowboys & Aliens, then?36:30 - 37:50 - Final judgements37:51 - 53:00 - Flop House Movie Mailbag53:01 - 59:21 - The sad bastards recommend. 59:22 - 1:00:30 - Goodbyes, theme, and outtakes.

Mr. Christmas himself, Alonso Duralde, of many other podcasts, returns to dissect the third, and most narratively sweaty, of the Santa Clause trilogy, "The Escape Clause." Also, if you're wondering who stole Cagemas, Dan says a few words about it. Let's not say "goodbye" let's just say "congratulations, Mr. Cage, on paying off your castles."

Wikipedia page for The Santa Clause 3

Movies recommended in this episode:

Adult Swim Yule Log

The Big Four

Mahanagar

Confess, Fletch

Ever tried Microdosing? Visit Microdose.com and use FLOP for 30% off + Free Shipping. 

TODAY is your LAST CHANCE to enter the SEXY XENOMORPH VIDEO CONTEST! The entry period ends with 2022! 

Sexy Xenomorph Contest: Full Rules —

• To enter the contest, make a music video for the song Sexy Xenomorph (link to song in show notes) in a style of your choosing.
• Once you’ve completed your masterpiece, upload it as a public video on YouTube with the words “Sexy Xenomorph” somewhere in the title, and be sure to credit the music to Howell Dawdy’s Fast Track and The Flop House podcast somewhere in the video or video description.
• Once the video is uploaded, email a link to us at flophousepodcast@gmail.com with the subject line “Sexy Xenomorph Contest.”
• We’ll be accepting entries up to midnight on New Year’s Eve, 2022.
• Once we have all the entries, the Flop House gang will pick our favorite ones – somewhere between 5 and 10 depending on how many entries we get – and we’ll set up a page on our website where people can vote on who wins.
• The winner will get a Flop House prize pack and will get to pick a movie for us to cover.

After a run of guests, we're celebrating Smalltember with just family. Because at a time like this, family is important, y'know? Almost as important as a movie where Kelsey Grammer menacingly smokes a cigar while telling a professional wrestler to rob a sky casino. That's right, we talked about Money Plane. You're welcome.

Wikipedia summary of Money Plane

Movies recommended in this episode:

We Need to Talk About Kevin

Da 5 Bloods

Motherless Brooklyn

It's an emotional moment. This is the last regular episode where all three peaches will be in Dan's apartment recording together, in the same space. It's also the ten year anniversary of this dumb podcast's existence. So how did we celebrate it? By taking a look at what was supposedly the worst movie back when we were growing up, Ishtar. Elliott vastly improves "Meet Dave," Dan somehow misses some nudity, and Stuart talks about a "tug in his butt," whatever that means. We're gonna miss this, guys.

Wikipedia synopsis for Ishtar

Movies recommended in this episode:

Robin Hood John Wick: Chapter 2 Winter Kills

LIVE SHOWS

Sept. 9 - No Elliott, but with (hopefully) Ronny Chieng in New York at the Now Hear This Festival

Oct. 10 - The whole gang in Los Angeles, at the Regent Theater

Dec. 9 - The whole gang in San Francisco, at the Marines Memorial Theater

We're joined by the wonderful Sharlene Wellington, owner or partner in many lovely Brooklyn bars (also, she's married to Stu). She wanted to discuss the 1984 summer camp comedy Meatballs Part II, and as three middle-aged men who were raised on dumb 80's shit, who were we to argue? Meanwhile, Sharlene brings her Jewish summer camp experience to the fore, Elliott waxes poetic about making first contact, Stuart promises some future Baby Boomer rants, and Dan takes us on a trip through Meatballs history.

Wikipedia summary for Meatballs Part II

Movies recommended in this episode:

Matinee

Midsommar

The Sisters Brothers

The Devil Wears Prada

LIVE SHOW DATES 2019!

September 28 – BOSTON – WBUR CitySpace (early show SOLD OUT, but there are still tickets to the later show!)

October 12 – LOS ANGELES – The Regent Theater

Thus  we enter November, the month known for having "No" theme. And, appropriately, we watched one of the most generic of modern action sequels, 300: Rise of an Empire. Meanwhile, Elliott lectures on Noid avoidance, Dan makes a public apology relating to one type of music and attacks another, and Stu makes an exciting announcement for enjoyers of comical books.

It's MAX FUN DRIVE time, everyone! That means we're putting out an extra episode on a week we'd normally take off and drink pina coladas or something. Instead we watched the Jennifer Garner revenge fantasy Peppermint, and hoo boy is it racist! Meanwhile, Elliott reveals his Mandela effect defense attorney strategy, Stuart gets lost in his thoughts, and YOU'RE NOT DAN'S DAD, JESSE.

If you like what we do, and you have the means, please consider becoming a Max Fun DONOR!

Wikipedia synopsis for Peppermint

Movies recommended in this episode:

Captain Marvel

The Wailing

Early Man

LIVE SHOW DATES 2019!

June 8 – PORTLAND – Revolution Hall

July 13 – MINNEAPOLIS – Parkway

September 28 – BOSTON – WBUR CitySpace

October 12 – LOS ANGELES – The Regent Theater

We round out our discussion of Zack Snyder’s Justice League with another (find the first ZS cut episode here, and our discussion of the theatrical cut here). Now let us never speak of it again.

No show notes on account of Emmys.

We reached into our archives, all the way back to 2017, to bring you this performance taped at the Now Hear This podcast festival. Elliott's not here (something about it being "too far to fly across the whole country for an unpaid gig, waaah waaah waaaah), but we've replaced him with guest host Ronny Chieng of Crazy Rich Asians and The Daily Show with Trevor Noah. Did we hold onto this so long, just to wait until Ronny was a BIG MOVIE STAR? Perhaps!

Hope you're ready for a "mini" that's as long as one of our regular episodes! With the new year just beginning, Dan, Stuart, and Elliott look back and discuss their top movies of 2022 (with the caveat that none of us has the time to see everything in the "best of '22 conversation), and also branch out to some other highlights and lowlights of the year in film.

In this minisode we take on the topic of teams of specialists, like you might find in heist films. If you want to dictate a future minisode, tweet at us @theflophousepod.

Live from Cake Shop as part of NYC Podfest. It's Gods of Egypt.

The star of the show, Hallie Haglund, returns to talk about ANOTHER adorable moppet, that incorrigible, family-killin' Esther, who's back 13 years later, for a prequel, where she's even younger! A big swing, fer shure -- does the inaccurately-named Orphan: First Kill pull it off? Find out in the first episode of SHOCKTOBER 2022!

Wikipedia page for Orphan: First Kill

Movies recommended in this episode:

Creating Rem Lezar

The Woman King

Passing

Earwig and the Witch

Ever tried Microdosing? Visit Microdose.com and use FLOP for 30% off + Free Shipping. 

Well, they said they'd get us in the end, and I guess they were right! We couldn't avoid those little beasties anymore, and decided to kick off our 80's flashback Shocktober with the oft-mentioned, but never fully discussed tiny creature feature Ghoulies!

If you live in Los Angeles, you can get tix for your choice of TWO live shows at Vidiots on 10/19. And if you prefer watching us from the comfort of home, check out our season of streaming shows, FLOP TV!

If you want to help out crew members and others affected by the SAG/AFTRA strike, you can Donate to the Entertainment Community Fund here.

The Wikipedia page for Ghoulies

Recommended in this episode:

No One Will Save You (2023)

The Birdcage (1996)

Late Autumn (1960)

Kevin Spacey as a cat sounds just purrrrfect (TM) for the Flop House, so we watched Nine Lives. Meanwhile, Stuart tells of his adventures with Kirsten Dunst, Dan suggests a terrible new method of shooting porn, and Elliott tells an offensive phone book joke.

Wikipedia synopsis for Nine Lives

Movies recommended in this episode:

Waxwork II: Lost in Time Losing Ground Encounters at the End of the World

If you would like to contribute to the Flop House Facebook charity drive for Planned Parenthood, GO HERE.

Buy tickets for the FLOP HOUSE LIVE SHOW.

Shocktober concludes with the playfully titled The Bye Bye Man, starring the titular Bye Bye Man and some boring people. Meanwhile, Elliott channels Freddy Kreuger to give the Bye Bye Man some advice, Stu explains Dan doesn't have to pick up floor food, and Dan has some questions about fish blow jobs.

Wikipedia synopsis for The Bye Bye Man

Movies recommended in this episode

Applecart Gerald's Game Happy Death Day Queen of Earth Christine

LIVE SHOWS

Dec. 9 –  San Francisco, at the Marines Memorial Theater

Elliott quizzes Dan on the nativity story, so they can modernize it into a hit blockbuster.

Check out FLOP TV! You can buy tickets here!

Get tickets for a stop on our January 2024 West Coast Tour.

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Check out Squarespace.com/FLOP for a free trial, and when you’re ready to launch, use OFFER CODE: FLOP to save 10% off your first purchase of a website or domain.

We break out of our normal format a bit for this BONUS EPISODE! How so? Well, #1, we watched a movie that we were all pretty sure we'd like (and, spoiler alert, we did) -- the body-swap horror-comedy "Freaky," and #2, instead of doing letters and recommendations, we take a bit of extra time to talk to our guest about her long career. 

Who is that guest? The wonderful Barbara Crampton, star of legendary horror movies Re-Animator, From Beyond, You're Next, and a little movie that doesn't get mentioned on our show a lot -- Castle Freak. And folks? Barbara is just an absolute ray of sunshine who was a delight to talk to (off-mic as well -- she spent a bunch of time just chatting with us and inquiring about our health and well-being). We hope you enjoy this as much as we did.

Wikipedia synopsis of Freaky.

Will Cameron Crowe ever rebound from his Elizabethtown slump? Probably not with the even-worse Aloha. Meanwhile, Dan calls out famed painter Leonardo Da Vinci, Elliott can't remember the rich Bazooka Joe cast of characters, and Stu engages in something that's definitely a bit.

Movies recommended in this episode:

It's Such a Beautiful DaySicarioClass of 1984

Mister Police, you could have saved us from watching The Snowman. You gave us all the clues. Meanwhile, Elliott takes us behind the scenes at Shrek, Stuart bravely reveals his medical syndrome, and creepo Dan McCoy is a creepy creep.

Wikipedia synopsis for The Snowman

Movies recommended in this episode

Southern Comfort Annihilation Silence

No, you didn't dream it. Way back in January the Peaches went to the University of Wisconsin, Madison (the dead of winter being the best time to visit the upper Midwest), and they discussed the infamous anti-hero superhero movie, Venom. This is that!

Wikipedia synopsis for Venom

Turns out that being Christopher Nolan's cinematographer is not the same thing as being Christopher Nolan, as we found out when we endured Transcendence. Meanwhile Elliott explains Dan's unusual way of reading, Stuart has a Transmorphers flashback, and Dan sings a little cow opera.

Movies recommended in this episode:The Evil ClergymanThe Woman on the BeachSunshine

Elliott quizzes us about prequels. Does anybody like them? Why prequels? WHY?

Also, remember to get a ticket for the Flop House VIRTUAL LIVE SHOW, on Saturday, February 6th, at 9 pm Eastern! Just $10! Buy a ticket HERE!

In this episode, Jordan Morris of terrific MaxFun sister podcast Jordan, Jesse, Go! stops by to co-host while Elliott's in England, a move he immediately regretted when we watched Strange Magic. Meanwhile, Dan explains the proper way to drink beer, Stuart evinces his disdain for improv, and Jordan displays his surprisingly deep knowledge of Three Ninjas.

Movies recommended in this episode:The Super CopsThe OvernightResults

We talk about the inexplicably star-studded comedy, The Bigfoot Who Saved Christmas. Excuse us, "Pottersville." Meanwhile, Stuart brags about his back strength, Dan uncovers the world of Raising Cain conventions, and Elliott goes on his longest (most infuriating?) bit ever.

Wikipedia synopsis for Pottersville

Movies recommended in this episode:

Anything Goes Suspiria Blindspotting

LIVE SHOWS:

The Flop House in Madison, WI on 1/26

The erotic thriller is back, baybee! Sure, it has more Ben Affleck gazing lovingly at snails than it used to, but you gotta expect that kind of wear and tear after leaving it in the garage for a couple of decades. This week, the peaches take on Adrian Lyne's direct-to-Hulu cuckold murder-stravaganza Deep Water.

Wikipedia entry for Deep Water

Movies recommended in this episode:

Video Diary of a Lost Girl -- If you want to be added to the mailing list for future screenings/ways to see, message the director through her instagram.

Perfect Blue

I Was a Simple Man

Can the magic of Cagemas overcome the most rote Nicholas Cage vehicle we've ever discussed, The Humanity Bureau? Meanwhile, Stuart reminisces about the Cage days of his youth, Dan writes a happy ending for some Foodfight! characters, and Elliott sets down some strict boundaries surrounding his son's bath time.

Wikipedia synopsis for The Humanity Bureau

Movies recommended in this episode:

Spider-Man: Into the Spider-Verse Leprechaun Returns Summer 1993

LIVE SHOWS:

The Flop House in Madison, WI on 1/26