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1–50 of 527

Pub. DateTitleDuration
18 Jan 2019127 w/ Brian Stelter “The Holy Order of Journalism, Excommunicating Steve King"01:23:23

"They're like a train -- a train that's always runnin' right on time." - Anonymous


w/ Brian Stelter (Chief Media Corespondent, CNN) (Host, "Reliable Sources")


- Moynihan Meets Ann Coulter (Again)

- A Boy and His Blog

- Authoritarian Storm Clouds

- The Temple of Journalism

- Is CNN in Resistance Mode?

- Grading Trump on a Curve

- Excommunicating Steve King


ALSO:

- Media Literacy

- "Page One", and The Business of News

- Kasich to CNN, Rep. Omar's Really Bad Day

- NPR + MAGA

- Russia-gate, and The Biggest Story of Our Time

 

Recorded: PM 1/17/2019

Published: 1/18/2019



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24 Jan 2019128 “A BOMBSHELL (If True), Punching MAGA Teens, Venezuela"01:46:19

- Jerry Brown

- BuzzFeed's Bombshell?

- Jason Leopold, Oliver Darcy

- The Temple of Journalism

- Anonymous Sourcing

- Punching Catholic Kids

- Stolen Valor, Callin' Bullshit


ALSO:

- Jill Abramson (Part 2)

- "GUILTY" - By M.C. Moynihan

- On Venezuela

 

Recorded: 1/22/2019 PM

Published: 1/24/2019



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04 Feb 2019129 w/ Brendan O'Neill “ Yellow Vests, Subway Sandwiches, Mostly Free Speech"01:59:28

w/ Brendan O'Neill (Editor in Chief, "Spiked")


- Jussie Smollett

- Stories For Every Narrative

- Ralph Northam

- Fancy Dress Parties

- The Weird Man’s Burden

- Anti Semitism, Hate Speech

- Stormy or STORMZY

- Yellow Vests Revolution

 

Recorded: PM 2/2/2019

Published: 2/4/2019



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13 Feb 2019130 “The Jill Abramson Affair, Jewish Money, Indentured Servitude"01:40:36

(Plagiarism, Green Room Encounters, and All The Receipts)


- We Need to Talk About Jill Abramson

- Too Important to be a Plagiarist?

- Rep Omar: You Might Be An Antisemitism, But Maybe Not

- Blackface: The Highest Form of Flattery?

- Klobuchar, FTW

- Team AOC's Green New Deal Fiasco


ALSO:

- Moynihan Steps Out of Line

- The Huxtable Compound

- Indentured Servitude

- 22 Savage

- The Red Shoe Diaries

- Emergency Podcasting


Recorded: PM 2/11/2019

Published: 2/13/2019



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21 Feb 2019131 “Jussie Smollett Indicted, Hate Crimes, Hacks in the Newsroom, Bernie"01:58:15

- Jussie Smollett, Indicted (Kmele Totally Called That Shit)

- But Then Again, The Whole Gang Totally Called That Shit Too

- Coast Guard Neo-Nazi would-be terrorist arrested

- Kmele and Liz Plank on "Reliable Sources"

- Unreliable hate crime statistics

- Social Justice Judo

- CNN Hires Sarah Isgur Flores

- Bill Moyers, Problematic Icon

- Bernie Sanders, Front-runner

- Some Idiot Wrote This

- Download "Headspace" Today


Recorded: PM 2/20/2019

Published: 2/21/2019



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04 Mar 2019132 w/ Mark Weisbrot “Venezuela: Failed State or Coup D'etat?"01:10:27

w/ Mark Weisbrot 

Co-Director @ Center for Economic and Policy Research

Author, "Failed: What the 'experts' got wrong about the global economy"


- Visiting w/ Hugo Chavez + Sean Penn

- Is "dictatorship" a hate word?

- Venezuela's elections

- Political prisoners

- State violence or police violence

- Coming coup?

- Embargoes, sanctions, and the collapse of the economy

- Who's to blame for hunger?

- The opposition

- What's a good faith negotiation entry point?


Recorded: 3/1/2019

Published: 3/3/2019



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07 Mar 2019133 “Canceling Neverland (and everything else), They're All Socialist Now"01:44:02

- Smooth Criminals, "Leaving Neverland" Skepticism

- Canceling Michael Jackson, R Kelly, and The Entire 1970s

- All Hate Matters

- Dual Loyalties

- Bernie Sanders Marched for Civil Rights, He's Still "Too White"

- Democratic Socialism**

- Revisiting Moynihan v. Weisbrot

- Some Idiot Wrote This

- Salman Rushdie


Recorded: 3/5/2019

Published: 3/7/2019



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11 Mar 2019134 w/ Andrew Yang “The Universal Basic Income (and a few other things besides)"01:04:02

A discussion w/ entrepreneur and 2020 Democratic Presidential hopeful, Andrew Yang. We explore The Freedom Dividend, Yang's proposal to pay $1,000 per month to every American over the age of 18.


Recorded: 3/6/2019

Published: 3/11/2019



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18 Mar 2019135 "Privileged College Parents, Platform Revoked"01:55:29

DESCRIPTION:

- Kmele's in 'Frisco', Moynihan's hungover, Matt got lit up on Twitter

- Desperate wealthy college parents headed to prison?

- The injustice of legacy admissions

- Elite colleges are overrated

- Biden v. Beto

- Venezuela's blackout and the three initials who shall not be named

- Platforming vs de-platforming

- Tucker Carlson's shock-jock period

- National Review swinging (and missing) at Trump

- If you’re going to “Cancel,” cancel everything

- Matt's Pat Caddell tribute/roast thing


Recorded: 3/12/2019

Published: 3/18/2019



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24 Mar 2019136 w/ Tina Nguyen "Islamists v White Nationalists, Segregated Schools, 2020 Hopefuls"02:02:44

w/ Tina Nguyen (Vanity Fair)


- Tina's Theranos voice

- Elizabeth Warren Holmes

- Revisiting the Universal Basic Income (Kmele hasn't endorse UBI or Andrew Yang)

- Technophobia, 'McDonald’s employees will murder you'

- The Three-Fifths Column

- Matt does Betomania

- Getting it wrong on Iraq

- The cycles of massacre reaction/coverage

- Islamists v. White nationalists

- Stuyvesant High School and Asian Privilege

- "Fuck off Tiger parents"


Recorded: 3/21/2019

Published: 3/24/2019



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28 Mar 2019137 "Use Your Collusion I and II, Jussie Smollett Walks"01:31:26

- Trump: Death by gloating

- Margaret Sullivan: the Captain Beefheart of journalism

- Glenn Greenwald spikes the football with a vengeance

- MSNBC doubles down

- Seth Abramson: Poet laureate, Resistance Hero

- Trump's enemies list and love of authoritarians

- Roger Stone and the D-list of DC conservatism

- Jussie Smollet's privilege

- Some Idiot Wrote This, Jane Mayer edition


Recorded: 3/26/2019

Published: 3/28/2019



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04 Apr 2019138 w/ Aaron Maté "Russiagate Victory Lap, Visiting Venezuela, Super Gaye Music"01:52:52

w/ Aaron Maté (@aaronjmate)


- Our Mathematical Universe

- "Leaving Neverland" Revisionism

- Russiagate: Right, Wrong, Whatever

- Jonathan Chait is “Completely* Correct*”

- When in Venezuela + Nobody Likes Sanctions

- Venezuela: Humanitarian Crisis, Economic Crisis"

- Making Friends + Enemies on Twitter

- "The Realm of Hungry Ghosts" (a book by Aaron's Dad)

- Stop Snitchin (On Your Sources)

- Joe Biden Feminism

- Kmele Talked w/ Thad

- Marvin Gaye: You're the (black) Man


Recorded: 4/3/2019

Published: 4/4/2019


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12 Apr 2019139 w/ Andrew Sullivan "Civil Rights, Immigration, Julian Assange, Too Many Popes"01:16:30

w/ Andrew Sullivan - Writer at Large for New York Magazine,


- Hating New York

- What Would Hitch Say?

- On Being a Reluctant, Problematic Civil Rights Pioneer

- Surviving a Death Sentence

- Immigration Backlash

- Obama Hated Identity Politics?

- Assange Arrested

- Pope Benedict blames the 60s

- Too Many Popes

- The Comfort of Religious Ritual


Recorded: 4/11/2019

Published: 4/12/2019


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19 Apr 2019140 w/ Ben Dreyfuss - "Muller Who, Jill Abramson's Privilege , True Hollywood Stories"01:52:17

w/ Ben Dreyfuss - Editorial Director @ Mother Jones


- Waiting for Godot

- Ben Dreyfuss is, Young Bernie Madoff

- Jill Abramson's 'Write' Privilege

- "Strange Justice" = "Strange Fruit"?

- Political turncoats

- Paleo-Neoconservative

- Private School Kids Buying Drugs

- Daddy issues

- Bret Easton Ellis' bad writing

- Death threats

- Race Realists


Recorded: 4/17/2019

Published: 4/19/2019


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25 Apr 2019141 w/ Eli Lake - "Muller Report, Julian Assange, Deep State Grifters "02:02:49

w/ Eli Lake (Columnist @ Bloomberg Voice)


- We Like Bari Weiss

- Moynihan is a Drunk, Also a Great Neighbor

- Muller Report

- Grifting, the Grifters, of Grif

- Eli Lake's Hood Pass

- Tom Arnold Was Great in True Lies

- All The Missing Tapes

- Seth Abramson's Beautiful Mind

- Election Interference / Hacking / Exaggerations

- Impeachments + Inquiries

- Assange: Journalist or Naw?

- Naughty Journalist in the Movies

- Dogs = White Supremacy

- That's Why Darkies Were Born


Recorded: 4/24/2019

Published: 4/25/2019


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12 May 2019142 - "The Great Deplatforming, Conspiracy Chic, The Mr. Bean Presidency"01:51:20

- "Alex Jones is not a civil rights leader!"

- Howard Kurtz was once serious

- Trump's attempted outing

- Phony classical liberals

- Free speech at the margins

- Every election is stolen

- Finding Loose Change

- Conspiracy theorists, right and left

- An Infinitely stupid Congress

- Donald Trump as Mr. Bean


Recorded: 5/8/2019

Published: 5/12/2019


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30 May 2019143 - "How to Get Arrested In Brooklyn, We're All Left Wing Hacks Now"01:32:58

- Kmele’s New Spot in Brooklyn

- Moynihan Gets Arrested

- Fisher is a jealous "lefty hack"

- Dave Rubin is totally NOT in his Feelings

- Assange, Journalistic Freedom

- Trump vs His Advisors

- European Elections

- MLK: Hero, Philanderer (and possibly worse), But Definitely a Hero

- Bill de Blasio Needs to Raise Some Money, Fast


Recorded: 5/28/2019

Published: 5/30/2019


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24 Jun 2019144 - w/ Coleman Hughes "Reparations, Congressional Testimony, Rap Battles"01:31:23

w/ Coleman Hughes


- Everyone Told Coleman Not To Testify

- Age, Experience, Credentials

- Lethal Weapons, Imaginary Friends

- “Shame Shame”

- Full Puerto Rican

- Moral Alchemy

- Coleman Reads His Mentions

- We, They, Us

- Candace Owens, Lil Pump, And The Decline of Western Civilization


Recorded: 6/21/2019

Published: 6/24/2019


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27 Jun 2019145 - "Dem Debates, Plan B for Iran, History for Nincompoops"01:38:44

- Moynihan Goes to Court

- Welch gets a Stress Sty

- RIP, Steve Dunleavy

- NBA O-W-N-E-R-S

- Democratic Debate Preview

- No Plan B for Iran

- Concentration Camp Kerfuffle

- San Fran Bans E-cigs (Till They Can Figure Out What the Hell is Going On"


Recorded: 6/25/2019

Published: 6/27/2019


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10 Jul 2019146 - w/ Patrick Radden Keefe "Northern Ireland's 'Troubles' and a notorious murder mystery"01:14:22

Guest: Patrick Radden Keefe, staff writer at the New Yorker, author of "Say Nothing: A True Story of Murder and Memory in Northern Ireland"


Description:

In this special dispatch, Michael Moynihan talks with Patrick Radden Keefe about the 1972 murder of Jean McConville, a mother of 10 in Belfast, at the hands of the IRA. Her disappearance remained a mystery for decades, but in his new book, Keefe names the names of the alleged perpetrators, and talks about the greater political implications of the Catholic-Protestant violence that continues to plague Northern Ireland to this day. Also, Moynihan reveals the moment when he realized Gerry Adams isn't the folk hero that many Americans believed he was.




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12 Jul 2019147 - w/ Molly Jong-Fast "Trump's Social Media Summit, Journalistic Scuttlebutt"01:41:46

Guest: Molly Jong-Fast is a contributor to The Bulwark and the author of three books. (@MollyJongFast)


Recorded: July 11th 2019



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28 Jul 2019148 - w/ Ben Dreyfuss "Mueller Talks, Send Em' Back, Al Franken, A$AP Rocky v. Sweden"01:45:12

Guest: Ben Dreyfuss (Editorial Director, Mother Jones)


Description:

- Moynihan in Martha's Vineyard

- Mueller sucks on TV

- Trump’s Razor: The dumbest explanation is the most likely

- “Send them back” — is it racist?

- Jane Mayer's Al Franken defense

- Shitty Media Men

- Deletes Jokes

- A$AP Rocky



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02 Aug 2019149 - w/ Jon Ronson "Porn Stars, Psychopaths, Cancel Culture"01:04:30

In this Special Dispatch, Michael Moynihan sits down with legendary journalist, author, and documentarian -- Jon Ronson. They discuss some of Ronson's most celebrated books, his fabulous new podcasts exploring the porn industry ("The Butterfly Effect", "The Last Days of August"), and his penchant for pissing off Alex Jones.


Jon Ronson's Books Include:

  • "Them" (2001)
  • "The Men Who Stare at Goats" (2004)
  • "The Psychopath Test" (2011)
  • "So You've Been Publicly Shamed" (2015)


Recorded: July 26th 2019

Published: August 2nd 2019



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18 Aug 2019150 - "Churn-alism, The Epstein Suicide (?), Effective Conspiracy Mongering"01:29:53

Welch, Moynihan, and Kmele are all in the same room for the first time in more than a month -- and it's a glorious reunion.


Recorded: August 16th 2019

Published: August 18th 2019



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26 Aug 2019151 - "That 1619 Project, Liturgical Journalism, The Batshit Presidency"01:59:34

- Ladies Libertarianing

- The Segregation of Everything

- The 1619 Project: “Everything that makes America exceptional is because of slavery”

- NHJ: “We’re the MOST American”

- Trump: “I hereby order…”

- Dual Loyalty (and cascading stupidity)

- David Koch, Rubin “Hurricane” Carter

- Park Slope Socialists


Recorded: August 23rd 2019

Published: August 26th 2019



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07 Sep 2019152 - w/ Steve Kornacki "Straight News, Political Tribalism, Chappell's Sticks & Stones"01:42:26

Recorded: September 4th 2019

Published: September 7th 2019


Guest: Steve Kornacki, National Political Correspondent for NBC News and MSNBC. Author of "The Red and the Blue: The 1990s and the Birth of Political Tribalism"



- RIP, Vice News Tonight on HBO

- Everybody kinda likes Joe Walsh

- The "Straight Man" on MSNBC

- New Jersey politics is so much more fun than national politics

- Kamala Harris channels robot John Edwards

- Negotiating with the Taliban

- Casualty counts matter

- It’s a better and worse media moment

- An alternate history where Mario Cuomo decides to run

- Pulling a string on Kornacki and he just goes

- Bill Weld’s novels

- Lonelier than the ideological middle is the temper-mental middle

- The guardrails have been annihilated

- Admitting to liking Chappelle’s show

- US military “protecting elections”

- The T Zone



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19 Sep 2019153 - "Moderate Chic, NYT's Kavanaugh Follies, Our Pal Corn Pop"02:01:54

- The “moderate chic” party

- RIP Emmet O’Lunney’s

- Brett Kavanaugh *Allegation(s)*

- College campuses in the 1980s was all about apartheid

- Moynihan’s Foggy Memory, and Everyone’s

- John Bolton, Out

- Obama’s Apology Tour and Trump’s Chomsky Impression

- Kmele’s Worried about Iranian escalation 

- Joe BIden’s "Corn Pop" Story: Fact Check=True

- George Packer’s Atlantic Piece on Schools

- Cancelling the SNL guy 

- Mark Sanford

- Business Insider's GOP debate

- Some Idiot Wrote This


Recorded: September 16th 2019

Published: September 19th 2019



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27 Sep 2019154 - "Still Teflon Don, Moynihan's Emmy, Vaping Panic"01:21:09

- Moynihan won an Emmy

- #EmmysSoWhite

- "Some saw..."

- Films Don't Matter

- Xenophobic Immigrants

- Biden, Trump, Ukraine

- Will He Be Impeached ? Maybe…And No

- It's Greta Thunberg's World

- The Vaping Muslim Ban

- Rashida Tlaib's Science of Smoking

- Tweet Dumpster Diving

- “Cancel Culture is A Myth”


Recorded: September 26, 2019

Published: September 27th 2019



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04 Oct 2019155 - "Unforgivable, The Swampiest Swamp, DC Star Wars Bar"02:02:13

- Picking fights in restaurants

- Botham Jean's brother forgives Amber Guyger for murdering his brother. And that's a problem. 

- Forgiveness vs. MORE HARSH SENTENCING

- Ukraine/Trump 

- Matt lacks the Xi-spot to laugh 

- Trump’s Afghanistan policy is a photo of ladies in pants 

- Base familial corruption

- Swampier than the swamp

- We've been had (if we're Obama or Trump supporters)

- Obama’s Jonas Brothers drone joke

- Trump’s DC hotel is the Star Wars bar

- Never Trumpers should be Never Government people

- Frank Luntz’s curtains open and play “Hail to the Chief”

- Impeachment check-in

- If Bannon hates the elites, why is he the primary source for Michael Wolff’s book

- Andrew Yang Hates Porn

- Christopher Hitchens' opinions from beyond the grave

- Don't write "Orange Man Bad"

- The Fifth Column LIVE, again?


Recorded: October 3, 2019

Published: October 4, 2019



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11 Oct 2019156 - w/ Walt Hickey "China Cancels the NBA, Trump Cancels the Kurds"01:58:15

Recorded: October 9th 2019

Published: October 10th 2019


GUEST: Walt Hickey,

Senior Editor for Data @ Insider

Founder @ Numlock News newsletter



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23 Oct 2019157 - w/ Meghan Daum "The Problem With Everything"02:15:33

Recorded: October 18th 2019

Published: October 22nd 2019


GUEST: Meghan Daum

Author, "The Problem With Everything" (2019)



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31 Oct 2019158 - w/ Thomas Chatterton Williams "Unlearning Race"01:21:50

Recorded: October 20th 2019

Published: October 31st 2019


GUEST: Thomas Chatterton Williams

Author, "Self-Portrait in Black and White: Unlearning Race" (2019)



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09 Nov 2019159 - w/ Bari Weiss "How to Fight Anti-Semitism, Shifting Political Baggage"01:49:46

Recorded: November 6th 2019

Published: November 9th 2019


GUEST: Bari Weiss

Op-Ed Staff Editor and Writer @ The New York Times

Author, "How to Fight Anti-Semitism" (2019)



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18 Nov 2019160 "Pub Hopping, Impeachment Hearings, Roger Stone Goes down"01:41:10

- Who Shot Ya? (Tupac, Biggie)

- Moynihan Drinks w/ Trump Supporters in Bay Ridge

- Buttigieg

- Impeachment Hearings

- Devin Nunes’ Garbage Clown Schtick

- Roger Stone Goes Down

- What Happened to Rudy Giuliani?

- Stealing Land in Texas, Pardoning War Criminals

- Patreon Launche (https://www.patreon.com/wethefifth)


Recorded: November 15th 2019

Published: November 17th 2019



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24 Nov 2019161 "Unimpeachably Guilty, ILoveFiona, Democratic Debate"01:54:13

Description:


- Trumpian Slam Poetry ("I Want Nothing!")

- Got a Thing for Fiona Hill

- Blue Pill Confessional

- Burisma Biden

- The Good, The Bad, and The Career Diplomats 

- Weird John Bolton Tweets

- The Wrestle Mania Impeachment

- Sacha Baron vs Facebook, Borat as Proto-Hate Speech

- Grading the Democratic Debate

- Spiking the Kaepernick

- About that Patreon


Recorded: November 22nd 2019

Published: November 24th 2019



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30 Nov 2019162 w/ Errol Morris "Steve Bannon, American Dharmam"01:01:01

The director of classic documentaries "The Thin Blue Line," "Fog of War," and "Standard Operation Procedure," Errol Morris has long been the doyen of critics...until he made "American Dharma," a film exploring the worldview and influence of former Breitbart boss and Trump campaign chief executive Steve Bannon. Predictably, Morris was accused of "platforming" Bannon and, for the first time in his career, America's most famous documentarian couldn't find a distributor for his film. On the day "American Dharma" opened in New York, Morris sat down with Michael Moynihan to discuss the controversy, whether or not Bannon is a "fascist," and why he thinks his most controversial movie is also his best.


Recorded: November 1, 2019



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08 Dec 2019163 "Kamala Quits, NATO Splinters, Impeachments for All"02:12:29

Description: 


- [ GRRT, BAOW ]

- Dragonball Z

- Kamala Drops Out, A Narrative Quickly Take Shape

- A De-platforming in South Bend

- 1619 and Historical Skepticism

- Are the Democratic Primaries Racist? (Can We Call It Seeding or Naw?)

- A Farewell to NATO? And the WTO? And the EU too?

- "Impeachment", The Board Game

- "The Irishman", A Review


Recorded: December 6, 2019

Published: December 8, 2019



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14 Dec 2019164 "UK Elections, Afghan Papers, Prophylactic Impeachment"02:08:08

Description: 


- Kmele’s Dog Ate His Own Tail

- Debunking mediums and magicians

- UK elections, the problem with Jeremy Corbyn

- WaPo’s “Afghanistan Papers”

- IG report and the FBI's no-good, very bad behavior

- Mispronouncing Nunes

- Acela Wars

- Greta Thunberg: Person of the Year

- The case against Welches Case Against Impeachment


Recorded: December 12, 2019

Published: December 14, 2019



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18 Dec 2019165 w/Conor Friedersdorf “Mayhem in Jersey City, Foreign Affairs, Gesture Politics”02:22:13

GUEST: Conor Friedersdorf

Staff Writer @ The Atlantic


DESCRIPTION:


- Patreon-only Preview

- Chapo Trap vs Conor

- An Underreported Attack in Jersey City

- Afghanistan Mea Culpa

- Something About Impeachment

- Reauthorize Every War, Every Year

- Biden, Dove of the Obama Administration

- Complicated Brexit voters

- Gesture politics

- The Paternalism of Blooombergism

- The Pronoun Talk

- Civility, Without Obsessing Over Identity


Recorded: December 17, 2019

Published: December 18, 2019



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25 Dec 2019UNLOCKED - Patreon Dispatch #4 🎁02:14:40

Happy Kwanza -- We've UNLOCKED a Patreon Only dispatch just for you (and everyone else)! Enjoy it, but don't get used to it.


The Williamsburg Tapes (Dispatch #4)

"Losing Our Religion"


DESCRIPTION

It's a pre-Christmas miracle! The Fifth Columnists are back at the stammtisch (stupid table) in Williamsburg for a long-ass special dispatch, mostly discussing things distant from the news cycle. Kmele watches "Mandingo" and, to the shock of both Welch and Moynihan, is slack-jawed by how racist it is. The lads answer some reader mail and discuss Michael Collins, the Pete Best of Apollo 11; offer some meandering thoughts on Catholicism and Seventh Day Adventism; ruminate on tragedy and loss; blather about the Richard Jewell movie nontroversy; recommend books about Israel; and provide two-plus hours of assorted other nonsense.


Recorded: 12/??/2019

Published: 12/25/2019



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03 Jan 2020Episode 166: “Buttigieg Loves Drugs, Soleimani Canceled, Media Malpractice”02:01:31

DESCRIPTION:


- Neighborhood Watch

- Moynihan’s Anti-Brit Streak

- Bernie’s Fundraising Clout

- Ron Paul’s Newsletters and Everlasting Ice Cream

- Buttigieg Wants to Decriminalize All Drugs

- Iran’s Quds Force commander Soleiman Killed in Iraq

- Media Malpractice on Vaping

- Chuck Todd's Fake News special

- About That Memo


Recorded: January 2, 2020

Published: January 3, 2020



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08 Jan 2020Episode 167 w/ Noah Rothman “ The Case for F*ckin Iran Right Up”01:37:00

GUEST: Noah Rothman

Associate Editor@ Commentary -- Contributor @ MSNBC/NBC News

Author: “Unjust: Social Justice and the Unmaking of America” (Jan 2019)


DESCRIPTION:


- Why the Washington Bullets became the Wizard 

- Bomb Iran?

- Will Americans ever support another Middle East War again?

- International commerce —> global middle class —> less war

- Trump thinks China should police the Strait of Hormuz

- What if we did NOTHING?

- Brian Stelter praises Tucker Carlson

- John Bolton might testify

- Moynihan shows up late

- Elizabeth Wurtzel

- Facebooks deep fake 'Problem'

- Thanks for the swags, and the booze


Recorded: January 7, 2019

Published: January 8, 2019



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18 Jan 2020Episode 168 w/ Miriam Elder: "Does Anything Matter Anymore?"01:54:01

GUEST:

Miriam Elder, senior political reporter for BuzzFeed News and former Russia correspondent for The Guardian. (@MiriamElder)


DESCRIPTION:


Our fake bios


Miriam's seven years in Moscow


Get Shorty, Alex Jones, and the D-list bullshit artists


Matt’s Russophobia isn’t as bad as MSNBC’s


Political theater provides cover to Putin’s authoritarianism 


Moynihan and Elder throw down over Bernie's alleged sexism. Plus: Is believing Warren or Sanders a #MeToo lesson?


Who is the nihilist candidate?


Banning lies on Facebook


Can a bully be funny?


The “Independents” couple forever



Recorded: January 16, 2020

Released: January 18, 2020



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30 Jan 2020Episode 169: "I'm so sorry this is happening to YOU"01:49:59

Description:


- When the mob came for the Fifth

- Hong Kong: Proto Police State

- The Democratic Field

- Bernie's Got a Shot, The Joe Rogan Bounce

- Criminalizing Disinformation

- Watching Lou Dobbs

- Fearing the Bern

- Truthy Skepticism

- An Impeachment Drive-By

- Eli on the FBI

- Some Idiot Wrote This (and this... and this...)


Recorded: January 29, 2020

Released: January 30, 2020



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06 Feb 2020Episode 170: "Trump’s Best Week Ever, Iowa Pile Up"01:49:21

Description:


- Kmele's Inner MAGA

- State of the Union Theatrics

- “Oh, God -- Fire the Media!”

- "The Big Lie" (and other nonsense)

- Mitt Romney’s Moment

- Trump’s Criminal Justice Reform

- Iowa Fiasco

- Waiting for Bernie to Turn on MSNBC

- Preview of Upcoming Patreon Episodes


Recorded: February 5th, 2020

Released: February 6th, 2020



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08 Feb 2020UNLOCKED - Patreon Dispatch #8 🎁01:42:06

The last time we did this, we said don't get used to it. Well, we meant it. But we're also feeling overly generous. So here is last week's Patreon-only dispatch, featuring Moynihan and Kmele. You're welcome.


--------


Kmele and Moynihan are back in Williamsburg drinking bad wine and talking shit...while trying to figure out why Welch isn't returning anyone's calls. 

Moynihan returns to Iowa and remembers why he hates journalists. Bumbling around the Hawkeye State, he chats with Andrew Yang, hangs with hardcore Trump types and fanatical Bernie bros. And they're all Iowa nice. 

Kmele has a black "Big Chill" weekend in Pennsylvania and opens about up his parents--to a gobsmacked Moynihan.

 

As usual, the lads try to catch up on a bunch of listener mail, provoking discussions about tattoos, Chile, Northern Ireland, Goop, The Central Park Five, and the "Preppy Killer" Robert Chambers.

 

And twenty years after it debuted, Kmele finally watches Curb Your Enthusiasm.


Outro music: RIP Andy Gill.

Recorded February 4, 2020



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13 Feb 2020Episode 171 w/ Jesse Singal "Biden's Ebony Firewall, No BBQ Sauce in American Dirt"01:37:40

Description:


- Black History Month

- There's no Barbecue Sauce in American Dirt

- Believe Some Death Threats, Leverage Others

- Oscar Obsession (Beautiful Mind Edition)

- Yang Dead Is Dead, Long Live Yang Gang

- Bernie's Ceiling, Biden's Ebony Firewall

- A SHOCKING Presidential Endorsement

- Bloomberg's Stop + Frisk Memory Hole

- ADL: "White Supremacy is On The Rise!"


Recorded: February 12th, 2020

Released: February 13th, 2020



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19 Feb 2020Episode 172 "The Swamp, The POTUS, The Press" w/ Swin Suebsaeng, Lachlan Markay01:34:42

w/ Asawin Suebsaeng and Lachlan Markay (White House Reporters @ The Daily Beast)

Co Authors: ""Sinking in the Swamp" How Trump's Minions and Misfits Poisoned Washington"


Description:


- Moynihan's Vocal Fry and "Actually Good" Accents

- Searching for "Henry Hills" in Trumpworld

- Lachlan's Conservative Apostasy

- Al Gore: Most Boring Interview Subject Ever

- Rats and Snitches

- Daily Beast: A "High-brow Tabloid"

- Woke (Racist?) Bloomberg

- The Muslim Ban

- From Seb Gorka to Hunter Biden

- Reporters vs Opinion Pundits

- Will the Press Scrutinize the Next President as Aggressively?

- The Never Trumpers Who End Up in the White House Anyway

- John Bolton's Next Act

- Swin/Lachlan's "Badgers Story"

- Drama Queens

- Bob Woodward

- Godfather 3, still bad

- Gore Vidal + Timothy McVeigh


Recorded: February 18th, 2020

Released: February 19th, 2020



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28 Feb 2020Episode 173 w/ Aaron Maté "Bernie's Campaign Math, From Cuba to Medicare for All"02:29:30

w/ Aaron Maté (Host @ PushBack, Contributor @ The Nation)


- Throwin Up Gang Signs

- COVID-19

- Cuban History 101

- Giving China Credit

- Billionaires and Unicorns

- Harvey Weinstein


Recorded: February 26th, 2020

Released: February 27th, 2020



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06 Mar 2020Episode 174 w/ Eli Lake "Biden Surges, Chris Matthews, The FBI Scandal"02:21:53

w/ Eli Lake ( Columnist @ Bloomberg Opinion)


- Typhoid Welch

- Biden crushes South Carolina and Super Tuesday

- Good 'ol Uncle Joe or Cognitive Decline

- "Democratic" Socialism?

- MAGA Corps and Bernie Bros Will Excuse Almost Anything Their Candidates Do

- Elizabeth Warren Lost -- It's Empirically Not HER Fault

- DNC Subterfuge

- Biden's Lies About Getting Arrested, Mandela Thanking

- Preview of the Biden v Bernie Debate

- Schumer SCOTUS Threat

- The FISA "Rubber Stamp"

- The Horrifying Books on Your Sshelf

- President Trump's *Disgraceful* Peace Deal w/ the Taliban

- Eli's Libertarian War Powers Fetish

- Steve Kornacki: Legend

- Chris Matthews

- Billionaire Lives Matter


UPDATED FILE


Recorded: March 5th, 2020

Released: March 6th, 2020



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14 Mar 2020Episode 175 w/ Ross Douthat "Apocolypse via Decadence, Coronavirus, or Porn"01:34:08

w/ Ross Douthat Columnist @ New York Times - Author of "The Decadent Society: How We Became the Victims of Our Own Successes"


DESCRIPTION: 


- Decadence, Low and High

- The Four Horseman

- “Giving Decadence Its Due”

- Birth Rates, Populations, Populism

- It’s Manifesto Season on the American Right

- Ross Still Wants to Ban Porn

- TVs Golden Age

- The Case for Joe Biden

- Don Jr's GOP

- A New York Times Conservative



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17 Mar 2020Episode 176: "My Corona; Pat Foster, Armed and in the Wilderness; and Delicious Miami Floor Drugs"01:50:51

UPDATE: The original version of this episode was uploaded out of sync. It has been replaced with a corrected version. We regret the error. But stop complaining. It's free.


The bat virus apocalypse continues. The Fifth Column soldiers on, shouting ¡No pasarán!


- Kmele is in the woods, Matt is in South Brooklyn, Moynihan is in hiding

- All COVID, all the time!

- Wait, so does he have it or not?

- Kmele questions the consensus

- Disaster capitalism becomes disaster socialism

- Money is fake. Let's give everyone a billion dollars, ok?

- Masked and bonding with the Hasids

- Why Matt can't smoke weed? (Yes, it involves Central Europe and the First Gulf War)

- Ken Burns gives it away

- Let's rerun 70s baseball and hockey games

- More on this damn virus

- We totally missed the Andrew Gillum wedding party

- Dude. The drugs were on the floor

- Pick some books. Let's read them

- And so very much more 



Recorded: March 16th, 2020

Released: March 17th, 2020



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21 Mar 2020UNLOCKED - Patreon Dispatch #14 🎁01:55:37

The quarantine continues...the Fifth Columnists have thoughts...


- Kmele is the Kurtz/Lauren Hill of Virginia

- Some listener mail

- We have the results! (Calm down Todd)

- Updates on the COVID

- Is it all going to fall apart? Probably

- Are we are at war? Not really

- Some more listener mail

- Some audiobooks to listen to while quarantined

- Some more sports to watch while no sports is happening

- Kmele really needs to bring it back to COVID

- An Italian friend drunk texts, loses her mind

- More disaster socialism

- The most important thing about COVID is what Trump calls it

- Some book recommendations


Released: March 19, 2020



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27 Mar 2020Episode 177: "More COVIDAPALOOZA, We're Inside the Plane, Matt Lovingly Fingers His Axe"02:03:19

- The lads are losing it in quarantine

- New York is "authentic" again / full of crackhead zombies

- Being entrepreneurial in a time of crisis

- So what's happening in COVID world

- And what does Kmele think *now*?

- Is this all capitalism's fault?

- More studies, more confusion

- The shitty media is even shittier than ever

- Hating on De Blasio

- Manufacturing scientific consent

- It's MH370. And we're inside the plane

- A wee bit of mail from a wee Scot Trot 

- Is there anything to talk about *but* COVID?

- Kmele has a new telescope/is a huge nerd in the woods



Recorded: March 26th, 2020

Released: March 27th, 2020



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02 Apr 2020Episode 178: "The Great American Shut In, Authoritarianism and Liberty Fetishism"02:26:08

With more than 80% of Americans under some form of movement restrictions, civil liberties are in retreat, authoritarians are gaining ground, and Kmele is feeling positively messianic.


PLUS "The Fifth Column's Pandemic Shopping Guide: How to beat the system, score hard to find paper products, and avoid deadly CHINESE pathogens"


- Keep Buggering On


Recorded: March 31st, 2020

Released: April 2ndth, 2020



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08 Apr 2020Episode 179: "A Most Racist Pandemic, Failure to Test"01:59:07

"When America catches a cold, black America... " -- well, we should maybe talk about that.


- Welch Makes a Baseball Analogy

- Moynihan helps Governor Cuomo shame the traitorous scum who refuse to STAY IN DOORS

- Amid growing concern about the disproportionate impact COVID-19 may be having on black folks in America -- Kmele has thoughts

- When Billionaires Give Money Away (it's never enough -- and it's never good enough -- for Moynihan?)

- China is Using Fake Numbers

- A Briefing Full of Jim Acostas

- President Trump Lies, Frequently -- Accept When He's Telling the Truth

- Trump's Greatest Failure

- Foreign Policy Tea Leaves


Recorded: April 7th, 2020

Released: April 8th, 2020



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17 Apr 2020180 w/ Bari Weiss: "We're All Sinologist Now"02:02:48

- Gender Traitors

- Teddy Pendergrass

- Trump’s Absolute Authority

- Cutting off WHO Funding

- What a Pandemic Can Teach You

- China and The American Free Press


Recorded: April 15th, 2020

Released: April 17th, 2020



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21 Apr 2020181 w/ Zaid Jilani, Coleman Hughes "On Pandemic Raceism"01:20:05

Kmele Foster, Zaid Jilani (@ZaidJilani) and Coleman Hughes (@coldxman) discuss the cacophony of concern about blackness+ racism in the midst of a once in a century global pandemic.


RELATED POSTS:


"Do COVID-19 Racial Disparities Matter?" - Coleman Hughes

https://quillette.com/2020/04/13/do-covid-19-racial-disparities-matter/


"Don’t Racialize the Pandemic" - Zaid Jilani

https://www.nationalreview.com/2020/04/coronavirus-race-fight-pandemic-dont-get-bogged-down-racial-categorization/


Recorded: April 14th 2020

Published April 20th 2020



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25 Apr 2020182 w/ Jonah Goldberg - "President Goop's Ultralight Beam Vaccine"02:50:30

w/ Jonah Goldberg Editor-in-Chief @The Dispatch, Host @ The Remnant Podcast


President Trump has an inspired idea for arresting a global pandemic. It involves ultraviolet rays, disinfectant washes -- and Welch seems convinced that it also has something to do with "butt stuff" -- which, honestly, it wouldn't be the strangest thing you've heard all day.


ALSO:


- Jonah on Political Homelessness

- Define "Prevaricate"

- Presidential Ineptitude and Slothfulness,

- How Shitty Henchmen Keep America Safe

- Why The CDC is So Popular

- Trump Punching is Boring

- The Most Dangerous Debate

- On Tucker Carlson

- The Best Rescue Package

- Georgia: Open for Business (or something)

- Funding Lockdown Protests  

- The Limits of Mitigation


Recorded: April 23rd 2020

Published April 25th 2020



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02 May 2020183 w/ Glenn Greenwald - "Pandemic Censorship + Close Encounters"01:57:32

w/ Glenn Greenwald Co-founding Editor @ The Intercept, Host @ "System Update"


A once in a century pandemic is producing unique and daunting challenges to civil liberties around the world. What are the necessary compromises? Where are the non-negotiable red lines? And what are those mysterious bright lights people have been seeing in the night sky? (The last one is easy: visitors from another galaxy, here to share their advanced technology with us... for a price).


ALSO:


- Avoiding a Hot War w/ Red-China

- COVID in Brazil

- Reading the YouTube Comments

- Logging Onto CompuServe to Own The Conservatives

- A Kinder, Gentler Greenwald

- Russia-Gate Revisited

- Why FISA Was Always Bullshit

- 'Just the Tip' Socialism


Recorded: April 30th 2020

Published May 2nd 2020



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06 May 2020184 w/ Rep Justin Amash - "The Case for the Spoiler*"01:07:09

w/ Rep Justin Amash US Congressman (Michigan's 3rd Congressional District) and 2020 Libertarian Presidential Hopeful


U.S. Representative for Michigan's 3rd congressional district since 2011, and currently serving as the first Libertarian Party member of Congress. Amash diagnoses what's wrong with America's politics, parties, and legislative process. And he makes the case for why he's ideally well suited to fix.


Recorded: May 4th 2020

Published: May 6th 2020



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17 May 2020185 w/ Ethan Strauss - "What's the Matter With Michael Jordan"01:30:55

w/ Ethan Strauss Writer @ Athletic, Author "The Victory Machine: The Making and Unmaking of the Warriors Dynasty" (2020)


- Getting Political

- NBA vs China

- Bad Deals and Bad Economics

- The Incomparable Michael Jordan

- 'What is Best In Life'

- Resuming the NBA Season

- Pissing off Kevin Durant


Recorded: May 13th 2020

Published: May 17th 2020



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25 May 2020186 w/ Balaji Srinivasan, Conor Friedersdorf - "Predicting Pandemics, Fixing Journalism"01:33:24

Balaji Srinivasan (@balajis)

Investor + Entrepreneur, Former CTO @ Coinbase, Partner @ Andreessen Horowitz


Conor Friedersdorf (@conor64)

Staff Writer at The Atlantic, Founding Editor of The Best of Journalism


- How Startups Think About Failure + Survival

- Pandemics, Panics, and Journalistic Incentives

- Forging Societal Truth

- Why the US Failed to Take COVID Seriously

- Why Journalist Hate The Valley

- Believing Half of What You Read

- Epistemology Algorithms 

- A Feature Set for Fixing Journalism

- Looser Arguments


Recorded: May 14th 2020

Published: May 25th 2020



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29 May 2020187 w/ Bari Weiss "Karens in the Ramble, Section 230"01:58:54

She wrote a column in the New York Times. She failed to mention her favorite podcast. She mentioned other podcasts. She texted us asking if she could come on the show to apologize. We agreed. Bari Weiss, the genial and gentle bête noire of woke culture, is back...hat in hand, asking for Fifth forgiveness. But she sticks around to discuss lots of other stuff:


- We are all Stasi agents now

- You're both Karens!

- A murder in Minneapolis

- Whose more powerful? Jack Dorsey or one of your senators?

- Should corporations be fact-checking politicians?

- Matt explains Section 230

- Moynihan rants about journalists being annoying

- A guest appearance from Nellie Bowles

- A really bad piece about white people and spices

- Kmele squeezes in some China/Hong Kong talk

- And some good news from Spencer!



Recorded: May 27, 2020

Published: May 28, 2020



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01 Jun 2020188 “On Anti-Racism II w/ Glenn Loury, John McWhorter, Coleman Hughes, Thomas Chatterton Williams”01:36:45

Kmele facilitates a follow-up conversation on race, racism, and anti-racism -- this time, in the midst of a global pandemic and increasing social unrest. You can find the first installment in this series of conversations here: http://wethefifth.com/episodes/121


GUESTS /


Glenn Loury

Professor of the social sciences and economics at Brown University


Thomas Chatterton Williams

Author, "Self-Portrait in Black and White: Unlearning Race" and "Losing My Cool"

 

John McWhorter

Professor of Linguistics, Philosophy, and Music at Columbia


Coleman Hughes

Fellow at The Manhattan Institute

Contributing Editor at City Journal


Recorded:5/22/2020

Published: 6/1/2020



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06 Jun 2020189 "A Pandemic, A Civil War, A Great Awokining "02:06:44
  • A Brief History of Right Now
  • Punk Police
  • It Might Actually Be Legal
  • Black on Black on Black
  • Bending the Knee
  • NYT Civil War
  • Essentialism in Practice
  • Law & Order
  • Passover
  • MLK on Riots


Recorded:6/4/2020

Published: 6/6/2020



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12 Jun 2020190 w/ Olivia Nuzzi " Insiders Guide to 2020, Defunding the Fuzz"01:37:24

w/ Olivia Nuzzi, Washington Correspondent @ New York Magazine


  • An Unprecedented Movement
  • Defunding the Police... Or Just Abolishing Them
  • Canceling Most Things, Razing The Rest
  • Moral Clarity in the News Room
  • Trump on the Campaign Trail, Biden's Strengths
  • Why Trump and Rudy Can't Stop Talking to Nuzzi


Recorded: June 10, 2020

Published: June 12, 2020



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17 Jun 2020191 w/ David French "American Racism, SCOUTS Stuff, Qualified Immunity"02:16:04

w/ David French, Senior Editor @ The Dispatch and Columnist @ Time


  • Help With Your Down Payment?
  • A Busy Day For SCOTUS
  • 2A, Qualified Immunity (Part I), Expanding Civil Rights
  • Thought Crimes
  • On Racism (and Anti Racism)
  • The Worst Dinner Party
  • The Censorship Impulse
  • Gone With the Wind, Song of the South
  • The Lost Cause... Myth?
  • What Northerners Really Want
  • Still in Love w/ Daisy Duke
  • Anti-racism Must Be Anti-race
  • Walk Humbly, Seek Justice, See the Humanity in Your Ops
  • Qualified Immunity (Part II) -- Why Qualified Immunity Matters


Recorded: June 15, 2020

Published: June 16, 2020



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25 Jun 2020192 w/ Jane Coaston "One Night In Tulsa, A Fool Proof Plan"01:38:58

w/ Jane Coaston, Senior Politics Reporter @ Vox


  • Some Sports Stuff
  • TickTock Swiftboats
  • Tulsa
  • Trumps Party
  • What Comes Next
  • Immigration + Visas
  • The Coaston Plan
  • More Black Lives Matter Talk
  • But What About....
  • Unbundling the Police
  • Liking the Neighborhood Cops


Recorded: June 23, 2020

Published: June 25, 2020



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01 Jul 2020193 w/ Jacob Siegel "Why We Need the NYT, The New Truth"02:17:08

w/ Jacob Siegel, Senior Writer @ Tablet


"The New Truth" (June 22nd 2020)

https://www.tabletmag.com/sections/news/articles/new-truth-rationalism-religion


"Journalists Abandoning 'Objectivity' for 'Moral Clarity' Really Just Want To Call People Immoral" (6/24/2020)

https://reason.com/2020/06/24/journalists-abandoning-objectivity-for-moral-clarity-really-just-want-to-call-people-immoral/


- The Lisa "Left Eye" Lopez of Journalism

- The Great Fireworks Conspiracy (continued)

- The NYT Slack

- All The Smoke

- The New Truth

- Rhetorically Invincible

- White Fragility, The Message of the Cross

- Moral Clarity

- World Heritage Sites

- The Wages of Sin

- Ethical Journalism


Recorded: June 25, 2020

Published: July 1, 2020



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06 Jul 2020194 w/ Wesley Lowery "Moral Clarity, Objectivity, and ALL THE SMOKE"02:11:50

w/ Wesley Lowery Correspondent @ CBS - "60 Minutes in 6"


Lowery Wrote A Thing:

"A Reckoning Over Objectivity, Led by Black Journalists" (NYT) - June 23, 2020

https://www.nytimes.com/2020/06/23/opinion/objectivity-black-journalists-coronavirus.html


Welch Raised Some Objections:

"Journalists Abandoning 'Objectivity' for 'Moral Clarity' Really Just Want To Call People Immoral" (Reason) - June 24, 2020

https://reason.com/2020/06/24/journalists-abandoning-objectivity-for-moral-clarity-really-just-want-to-call-people-immoral/


Some Twitter Drama Ensues.

The Parties Agree to Settle Things Directly.


...And now, here you are. All caught up, ready for the fireworks (literally + figuratively).


Recorded: July 2, 2020

Published: July 6, 2020



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10 Jul 2020195 w/ Yascha Mounk "Woke Fragility"02:07:05

Two-plus hours with our favorite German, Herr Yascha Mounk, contributing editor at The Atlantic and founder of Persuasion, a publication dedicated to promoting and defending the "values of a free society."


The lads discuss that Harper's letter on cancel culture, signed by Kmele and Yasha (and Salman Rushdie, Martin Amis, JK Rowling, et al); the attempt to cancel people who signed a statement opposing canceling people; how everyone's still a fascist; the painful absurdity of Robin Diangelo; a Matt and Kmele fight about Trump's Mt. Rushmore speech; the dangers of the populist right; El Chino; and so very much more.


Recorded July 8, 2020



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16 Jul 2020196 w/ Josh Szeps "Covid, Cancellation, and Melanated Peoples"02:11:41

w/ Josh Szeps (né Zepps), ABC Australia and host of the Uncomfortable Conversations podcast.


Josh-o's back and the dingo has his baby! Australia's most listened-to radio host joins the Fifth from his COVID-free compound in Sydney to talk nonsense about:


  • Paul Hogan (obviously)
  • How the Aussies handled the COVID
  • That story about our friend who resigned from the Times
  • "Cancel culture," right and left
  • "Good Morning ya' ****s!"
  • Armageddon the shit out of that rock
  • Are we becoming a totalitarian hell hole? (Probably not)
  • Viacom race theorist Nick Cannon on masked singers, Mariah Carey, and the Rothschilds.
  • Matt knew a Nazi


Recorded July 15, 2020



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18 Jul 2020UNLOCKED - Patreon Dispatch #29 🎁 - The Williamsburg Tapes - This Podcast is Lava01:29:51

We haven't unlocked a Patreon episode since way back in February. But we (Moynihan) were feeling generous, so here's a paywalled bonus episode from July 13, liberated for all of you cheapskates. You're welcome.


If you want a new subscriber-only episode every week (plus slurring live Zoom calls, lost episodes, mail bag episodes, a community of like-minded psychos, etc), subscribe here!


--------------


For only the second time since the Bat Flu, the lads are back in the same room...and back at the Stupid Table™ in Williamsburg. The energy! The booze! The crosstalk! Kmele singing! Yay! It's an hour and half bull session covering the most important debates in America. Zum beispiel: 


- Moynihan's new CNBC show "Stock Monstah Dood!"

- Getting psyched about--and possibly auditioning for--a show Kmele loves but has never seen

- Kmele is Mr. 2X. Moynihan is Mr. Angry Irishman Driver

- Understanding the core of the anti-racist project

- Matt's formative moment as an 18-year-old journalist

- The privileged people who hate really privileged people

- Yes, the lads talk about the endless LETTER WARS

- Kmele rants about a Jo Jorgensen tweet

- What does it mean to be anti-racist?

- If they win, we will all will end up living in a joyless world

- Back to Bay Ridge (and coming upon a pro-NYPD protest)



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27 Jul 2020197 w/ Glenn Greenwald, Thomas Chatterton Williams "Hypocrisy, Controversy, Cancellations"01:23:29

Glenn Greenwald,

Co-Founder @ The Intercept

Author, "No Place to Hide"


Thomas Chatterton Williams

Contributing Writer @ New York Times Mag

Author, "Self Portrait in Black and White"


After a little internet drama related to the Harper's Open Letter, Kmele got together w/ Thomas and Glenn to discuss.


  • Why we needed "A Letter on Justice and Debate"
  • Why Glenn isn't a Signatory
  • What is Cancel Culture
  • Do we really need to talk about this RIGHT NOW
  • Evangelism or Excommunication
  • Hypocrisy and Healthier Conversations


Recorded July 24, 2020

Published July 27, 2020



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29 Jul 2020198 w/ Nancy Rommelmann "There's a Riot Goin' On"01:50:19

Guest: Nancy Rommelmann, journalist and author of To the Bridge: A True Story of Motherhood and Murder


Nancy Rommelmann, friend of the Fifth and former resident of Portland, Amerikkka, returns from the ramparts of the revolution with news, anecdotes, and a glimpse at our glorious future. Alis volat propriis. So we asked our very own Lady John Reed just what the hell is happening in the insurrectionist precincts of the Pacific Northwest...


  • Nancy doesn't recognize parts of Portland
  • What everyone is getting wrong about the protests/riots/federal intervention
  • Wait, where is the Portland PD?
  • Shares in a homemade body armor business are trading higher today...
  • Why you're not hearing that amazing, hilarious, enlightening conversation we had about the secret app
  • (It's because the SD card ran out of space and no one noticed...)
  • We return after our tech screw up--much, much drunker--to talk history vs. journalism
  • No one arguing about colonial history knows anything about colonial history
  • It sort of falls apart around this point...
  • And by the way: stop telling us what we should care about


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09 Aug 2020199 "Nothing to See Here, An Emergency Every Minute"01:57:42
  • Drugs You Should Try
  • Heroine, A Black Drug?
  • Black People Are All The Same
  • Voter Fraud, by Mail
  • Selecting A VP
  • Cognitive Tests (Person, Woman, Man, Camera, TV)
  • Scare Tactics
  • Suburban Lifestyle Dreams
  • The State of New York
  • FBG Duck
  • New George Floyd Video
  • The Trouble With China
  • Facebook vs TikTok
  • Blazing Saddles


Recorded Aug 6, 2020

Published Aug 9, 2020



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13 Aug 2020200 w / Andrew Sullivan "Uncancellable Andrew and the Great Media Miasma"01:39:24

We can't believe it. Neither can you. It's our 200th episode!! (Well, not including the thirty-plus, subscriber-only Patreon episodes, which are looser, bawdier, and even more problematic...so stop freeloading and subscribe!). In celebration of this momentous anniversary, we called up our old friend Andrew Sullivan, fresh from his separation with New York magazine and joining from his Provincetown whirlpool, to discuss:


- Daddys, bears, and pervs...oh my!

- Andrew has a conversation with some younger gays

- A generation without tragedy

- BTW: No one actually says LGBTQ+

- And you're not suppose to like being oppressed

- Why did Andrew leave New York magazine and what is the "mysterious miasma"? 

- Sully starts his own thing, quickly realizes he was underpaid

- The drunk brilliance of old-school British journalism

- FWIW, Andrew didn't write The Bell Curve

- The anti-Sullivan fatwa issued by a former employer

- Michael Kinsley's two rules of writing 

- The future of magazines, the future of media 

- Why you should read, listen to, and befriend people with bad ideas

- Kmele, Kamala, and the prostitutes

- Andrew convinces us to...change


Recorded Aug 13, 2020

Published Aug 14, 2020



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23 Aug 2020201 w / Coleman Hughes "DNC COVID CON, QAnon Don, Canceling Kmele"02:35:42

w / Coleman Hughes


🤫


Recorded Aug 21, 2020

Published Aug 23, 2020



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01 Sep 2020202 w / Tina Nguyen "Trump on Twitch, Jacob Blake, Kyle Rittenhouse"01:49:52

w / Tina Nguyen (White House Reporter @ Politico)


  • Watching the RNC
  • Trump's on Twitch
  • Nasty Emojis
  • The Fire Next Time (Kenosha Edition)
  • "What's the big deal? Your insurance will pay for it?"
  • Total Failure of Political Leadership
  • Matt Welch: Snowflake?
  • Marines in Portland? 
  • Libertarian Enough?
  • Leaping to Conclusions, Outright Lying
  • Independent Investigations
  • Jacob Blake: Things We Don't Know
  • Kyle Rittenhouse: Things We Don't Know


Recorded Aug 31, 2020

Published Sept 1, 2020



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06 Sep 2020203 w/ Nancy Rommelmann "From Portland to Kenosha to Rochester"02:12:10

Guest: Nancy Romemelmann, journalist and author of To the Bridge: A True Story of Motherhood and Murder


Moynihan is back from Kenosha, and Nancy Rommelmann returns for an update on the goings-ons in Portland.


  • On the ground in Kenosha
  • On the ground in Portland
  • Media Malpractice, Self Deception
  • DC, Rochester, What's Next
  • Biden v Trump
  • *Worse Than Useless Facts*
  • Details That Matter
  • Going Full MAGA


Recorded Sept 5, 2020

Published Sept 6, 2020



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13 Sep 2020204 w/ Steve Kornacki "What's Up With These Polls?"01:45:20

Guest: Steve Kornacki, National Political Corespondent @NBC News / MSNBC


  • Making TV News During a Pandemic
  • Doing Your Own Makeup
  • Last Man in Midtown
  • We're All You Tubers Now
  • It'll Be a Blow-Out, Or It'll Be Close
  • Polls You Can Trust
  • Black Voters, Impeachment, Collusion
  • State of the Parties
  • State of the Union
  • State of the Media
  • Paper or Plastic


Recorded Sept 11, 2020

Published Sept 13, 2020



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24 Sep 2020205 “If You're Reading This, It's Too Late”01:48:47

NOTE: This dispatch was beleaguered by technical and logistical challenges. The audio actually turned out pretty good (all things considered), but the entire thing was very nearly scrapped. Those challenges contributed to a delayed-release — and because the world has gone quite mad —the news cycle is evolving rapidly. 


All the same, still lots of very relevant (even prophetic) stuff in this dispatch, but it was recorded before the Breonna Taylor Grand Jury announcement that inspired a night of protests, riots, and violence. 


  • Home Improvement
  • Latinx, Things You Must Know About The Cuban
  • Trust the Process
  • Debate Preview
  • RBG
  • Hypocrisy and Norm Evisceration
  • Who to Blame
  • A Loss of Faith, A Looming Election Hellscape
  • About that TikTok Deal
  • We Choose Violence
  • 1619 Lies, Bullshit, Stealth Edits, Motivated Reasoning
  • If The Schools Already Suck, Can 1619 Make Them Worse (or better)
  • National Patriotism Curriculum
  • All My Critics Are Racist, Which Is Terribly Convenient for Me


Recorded Sept 20, 2020

Published Sept 24, 2020



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03 Oct 2020206 w/ Damon Root "Packed Courts, Peaceful Transfers of Power"02:21:29

Guest: Damon Root @ Reason Magazine, Author, "A Glorious Liberty: Frederick Douglass and the Fight for an Antislavery Constitution"


  • Trump Makes His Pick
  • How Republicans Will Be Disappointed
  • Court Packing And Other Shenanigans
  • Historical Context, Oppressing People of Color
  • COVID Rumors
  • Debate Night Dog Whistles
  • What Trump Really Means
  • Vote by Mail (But Throw Out the Ballots)
  • The First and Only Lady


Recorded Oct 1, 2020

Published Oct 3, 2020



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20 Oct 2020207 "Hunter's Laptop, Ordinary Corruption, Darkest Night"01:58:26
  • Moynihan's Old, New House
  • COVID... is Fake?
  • Siri, Do Black Lives Matter?
  • Dueling Town Halls
  • Everyone is Awful, Even You, (But Not Really)
  • The Brief And Highly Overrated Return of Respectability Politics
  • Politics of Bullshit
  • Foreign Bodies
  • The Revolt of the Public
  • Darkest Totalitarian Hellscape


Recorded Oct 18, 2020

Published Oct 20, 2020



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24 Oct 2020208 - "Techno Fascism, Jerking Jeff, and the Mendacious Media"01:46:40
  • Bannon's back. The New York Post isn't.  
  • Don’t talk about Hunter!
  • Are we living in a Techno Fascist Reich?
  • Regulate, regulate, regulate
  • The unforeseen consequences of deplatforming?
  • Qanon inflation 
  • To the gulag, go!
  • Russia, Russia, Russia
  • Which New York Times editor does Matt call "a loathsome toad"?
  • FYI: Political journalists cannot cover “politically driven events”
  • Debate, debate, debate
  • Coherent on Corona! 
  • But also full of shit!
  • And Corona reporting is still awful 
  • Mad Matt on a Mendacious Media 
  • Are people still wiping down their groceries?
  • WHATS UP TWITTER WORLD, IT’S THE JUICE
  • Jeff Toobin, American Hero / OJ, not guilty
  • Maybe an election-night Zoom thing?


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05 Nov 2020209 - "And The Winner Is..."01:41:32
  • What Election?
  • The Perils of Watching Cable News
  • What You Talkin Bout Welch
  • The Got'Damn Polls
  • Anticipated Unrest
  • Black Woman Stabbed, By Black Lives Matters Supporters?
  • What Happens to the Media
  • What Happens to Republicans
  • What Happens to Democrats
  • Stereotypes are Fine Now
  • You People Aren't Supposed to Vote That Way
  • Woke-spiracy
  • Fighting Them on The Beach


Recorded Nov 4th, 2020

Published Nov 5th, 2020



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15 Nov 2020210 - w/ Jason Stanley "What the Fascist, Covid Season, Race Critical"02:09:50

Guest: Jason Stanley @ Author, "How Fascism Works", Professor of Philosophy @ Yale.


  • The Answer
  • Extremely Online, Prospective Hypocrisy
  • Cancel Culture
  • No Tellin
  • Trump's Blacketst Swan
  • But He's a Fascist
  • Critical Race Back and Forth
  • Pretty Good (for a Black Guy)
  • Covid


Recorded Nov 12th, 2020

Published Nov 14th, 2020



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19 Nov 2020211 - w/ Glenn Greenwald "Leaving The Intercept, Crying Like a Baby"01:14:07

Guest: Glenn Greenwald @ Co-Founder, The Intercept


  • The Move to Substack (https://greenwald.substack.com/)
  • The Marvelousness of the Fifth Column
  • The Job Market
  • The Reply to Critics
  • The Blow by Blow
  • The Culture
  • The Hunter Biden Laptop Situation


Recorded Oct 30th, 2020

Published Nov 19th, 2020



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26 Nov 2020212 - "A Thanksgiving Miracle"01:58:30

An issue with the mics. An inspired fix. A nearly aborted dispatch manages to slide into your feed just in time for the stranges Thanksgiving in decades.


  • A Rolling Start
  • When Moynihan Met Oprah
  • Coup d'é HAHAHAHAHA
  • "I Told You"
  • Salvaging the Culture
  • Crisis of Authority
  • Covid Masks
  • Murder Rates
  • Generational Divides
  • Calling it Quits
  • It's A Job, Ain't It?


Recorded Nov 24th, 2020

Published Nov 26th, 2020



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04 Dec 2020213 - "Da Mystery Of Defunding the Police (while Stopin' the Steal)"01:59:00

"The Toad style is immensely strong, and immune to nearly any weapon. When it's properly used, it's almost invincible." - Five Deadly Venoms


  • Way Out Of Line
  • The Incredible Asshole Machine
  • Related Controversy
  • A Stolen*** Election
  • Obama 💘 Cops
  • Welcome to Murderapolis
  • A Civil War, A Tent Revival
  • Han Obviously Shot First (Probably Doesn't Matter)
  • Bothsidesing: Maybe Not a Bad Idea
  • Revivalist vs Redistributionist
  • American Pie


Recorded Dec 3nd, 2020

Published Dec 4th, 2020



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12 Dec 2020214 - w/Ben Dreyfuss "Another Dreyfuss Affair"02:18:25

Look, you asked for it. Fifth fan favorite (ed - we really don't understand you people) and Mother Jones editorial director Ben Dreyfuss (né Gould) is back. And the results are wonderfully shambolic. But seriously: make sure the kids are in bed before press play....


  • Ben is "on leave" from Mother Jones
  • Why Ben's editor blocked him on Twitter (and you should too)
  • No ice in Hawaii, no avocados in Wisconsin
  • The worst movie Ben's dad ever made (Or was it the best?)
  • Why everyone in DC hates Facebook
  • Why people read dumb articles on Facebook
  • Ben starts a Substack. Obviously.
  • What Ben learned about Donald Trump in the suicide ward
  • Manipulating people on the internet
  • And so much more...


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19 Dec 2020215 - "New in Town, Vax Populi"02:06:04
  • New Views
  • Demographic Considerations
  • What Seems to Be The Problem Officer?
  • The Honorable Minister
  • Vaccine Rollout
  • Careful Reporting
  • Post Trump News Cycle
  • The Flagrancy
  • Predicting Apocalypse


Recorded Dec 17th, 2020

Published Dec 19th, 2020



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26 Dec 2020216 - w/ Greg Lukianoff "From Campus to Caliphate"01:46:38

Guest: Greg Lukianoff @ Foundation for Individual Rights in Education (President). Co-Author, "The Coddling of the American Mind"


  • 🎁
  • 🎁
  • 🎁
  • 🎁
  • 🎁


Recorded Dec 23rd, 2020

Published Dec 25th, 2020



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31 Dec 2020217 - "You Gon Learn, Hawley's Gamble"01:42:17

- Kmele 2020

- AllyShip

- Secret Shows

- The Internet Never Forgets

- Trap Lord

- Burning the Witch (and maybe that annoying lady from down the street too)

- Puritanism Without The Fun

- Schadenfreude

- Inconveniencing the Steal

- Eviscerating Democracy (w/ Hyperbole)

- Stop Laughing -- It's Not Funny

- Thank You


Recorded Dec 30th, 2020

Published Dec 31st, 2020



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08 Jan 2021218 - "A Slovenly Rebellion (Pass The Tequila)"02:09:59

Welcome to 2021


  • A Coup d'état? An Insurrection?
  • A dark beginning? A despicable bookend? A world of shit?
  • We'll get to that -- but we're gonna need a lot more booze.


Recorded Jan 6th, 2021

Published Jan 7th, 2021



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15 Jan 2021219 - w/ Anna Khachiyan "Double Impeachments, All the Balenciaga You Can Carry"01:46:12

Guest: Anna Khachiyan @ "Red Scare" (Co-Host)


  • Kinda Canceled
  • Holding the Mic
  • Outrage Boner
  • Dirtbags
  • Tight Sweaters, Tighter Shirts
  • Mo' Impeachments
  • The MAGA Riots
  • Culpability
  • Cultural Amnesia, Sweetest Taboos
  • Canceling Trump
  • Canceling the Rest of Yall?


Recorded Jan 13t, 2020

Published Jan 14th, 2020



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22 Jan 2021220 - The Dawning of Yet Another Terrible Era02:06:53
  • Is Melania the greatest first lady since Florence Harding?
  • Does MC Hammer hate Kmele?
  • Let the sycophancy begin!
  • Qanonsense
  • Understanding the Trump voter
  • We're all weird and wrong
  • The new Republican Party is awful. So is the new Democratic Party.
  • The dumb 1776 project: "It's like Stephen Miller pooped on a legal pad"
  • Hating big tech
  • How not to combat bad speed


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25 Jan 2021221 - UNLOCKED Patreon Episode - Kmele's Victory Lap (Dem Haters)01:21:42

It is upon us: that very rare occasion when we unlock a Patreon episode for the masses. 🎁🎁🎁


If you are clever and don't want to miss future locked episodes, subscribe here.


---------


Rather than our typical bullet-pointed show notes, we'll keep this one short and sweet. Because try as they might to pull the conversation away from Kmele's bravura performance on Real Time with Bill Maher, the lads just couldn't manage it. Although they do respond to a listener email about the Pet Shop Boys...and Kmele does says the word kerfluffle.


That is all. 


Enjoy.



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30 Jan 2021222 - "Moynihan Squeezes the Short, Cynics and Skeptics"02:06:31
  • Make a Mint w/ Moynihan
  • Who's Behind the Squeeze
  • On the War Path
  • Strange Bedfellows
  • Popularity Contests
  • Even Libertarians
  • Equity and Private Prisons
  • Coming Attractions


Recorded Jan 28th, 2020

Published Jan 29th, 2020



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