Silver Bullet Survivor (Jack)

In this episode, I talk about my story of being a husband and father, getting served with a restraining order, the fallout that happened afterwards, and my journey towards healing and becoming a better parent.

Email me at jack@silverbulletsurvivor.com.

In this episode, I talk about why they do this, and how you can find closure from your relationship. Hint: you can't. 

Email me at jack@silverbulletsurvivor.com.

In this episode, I talk about how to address parental alienation and responding appropriately when kids tell you things no parent ever wants to hear.

Email me at jack@silverbulletsurvivor.com.

In this episode, we dive into the mechanics of the smear campaign and what you can do to protect yourself as well as how to live with dignity afterwards.

Email me at jack@silverbulletsurvivor.com.

In this episode, I talk about what I did during Zoom videos and supervised visitations in order to protect my kids and be the best dad I can be despite my co-parent's manipulation.

Email me at jack@silverbulletsurvivor.com.

In this episode, I talk about what I did during unsupervised visitations to create good memories and establish a good relationship with my children despite my co-parent's best attempts at alienation.

Email me at jack@silverbulletsurvivor.com.

In this episode, I talk about how to create a strong bond with your children, regardless of your co-parenting or custody situation.

Email me at jack@silverbulletsurvivor.com.

In this episode, I talk about the resources I've used on my journey to healing and growing as a father. Here are the links to those resources.

Co-parenting Podcasts

• Co-parent Dilemmas, with Diane Dierks and Rick Voyles
• The High Conflict Co-parenting Podcast, with Brook Olson

Co-parenting Books

• Divorce Poison, by Dr. Richard Warshak
• Co-parenting with a Toxic Ex, by Dr. Amy Baker
• BIFF, by Bill Eddy

Self-Help Books

• Splitting, by Bill Eddy
• Psychopath Free, by Jackson MacKenzie

Self-Help Podcasts

• Navigating Narcissism, with Dr. Ramani
• Surviving Narcissism, with Dr. Les Carter

Email me at jack@silverbulletsurvivor.com.

In this episode, I share the secret ingredient to winning court cases. It's very simple, yet unimaginably difficult. 

Email me at jack@silverbulletsurvivor.com.

In this episode, I dive into the psyche of the narcissist and what causes them to become who they are. 

Email me at jack@silverbulletsurvivor.com.

In this episode, I talk about what it means to find peace in this situation.

Email me at jack@silverbulletsurvivor.com.

In this episode, I talk about what it means to be the best version of yourself so that you can be the best parent possible for your kids.

Email me at jack@silverbulletsurvivor.com.

In this episode, I talk about the ego, why we have it, why it's dangerous, and what you can do to overcome it. 

Email me at jack@silverbulletsurvivor.com.

In this episode, I talk about the latest alienation tactics my coparent is engaging in, and how I'm dealing with it.

Email me at jack@silverbulletsurvivor.com.

In this episode, I discuss a mental exercise of asking myself "What more could I have done?" to prevent being in this situation. The short answer is, nothing. 

Email me at jack@silverbulletsurvivor.com.

In this episode, I discuss my new relationship with "anger". 

Email me at jack@silverbulletsurvivor.com.

On this episode, I discuss the well-intentioned advice you should ignore. 

Email me at jack@silverbulletsurvivor.com.

On this episode, I outline several steps I took in order to undo the brainwashing and alienation my children were exposed to. The general steps I took are below. All links to websites do NOT have affiliate links so I'm not getting paid for any of them. This is just what I've done, and what I bought.

The most important thing to do is to start getting overnights. Then you can do these things a lot more effectively.

1. Buy children’s books that focus on parenting (whatever gender you are). Bonus points for focusing on the specific relationship (father-daughter, mother-son, etc).
2. Buy custom books. I used Wonderbly. https://www.instagram.com/wonderbly/?hl=en
3. Buy custom-shirts. I forget the vendor I used, but this is the shirt I got. https://www.etsy.com/listing/1706642294/custom-the-legend-of-dad-shirt-best-dad
4. Listen to your children’s favorite songs. Sing along with them.
5. Play video games, especially one-player games where you figure things out. Don’t play 1v1 or games where you fight each other.
6. Go outside, go adventuring. We look for acorns, go fishing, go hiking.
7. Buy them gifts. Doesn’t have to be expensive. Examples of things I bought my kids that they loved:
   1. https://www.amazon.com/Treasure-Multicolor-Diamonds-Drawstring-Decorations/dp/B093LJ2PX9
   2. https://www.amazon.com/Metal-Pirate-Coins-Doubloons-Realistic/dp/B0821QY292
8. Make them friendship bracelets.
9. Let your kids see you do grown-up things.
10. Do things that show your kids you’re thinking of them when they’re not with you.
11. Talk to your kids about general things in life. 
12. Read them bedtime stories. Anything from children’s books to Lord of the Rings.
13. Buy them a stuffed animal, something they can sleep with. 
14. Most powerful thing I've done ==> Sing them lullabies and caress their hair while they’re falling asleep.
15. Volunteer at their school. And let them see you volunteer.

Email me at jack@silverbulletsurvivor.com.

On this episode, I share the best way to get revenge against your ex. You need to do 2 things:

1. Be the best version of yourself. 
2. Be better than your ex. 

Not just slightly better. Your goodness has to completely shadow her badness. If your ex is at -5, you have to be at 6. If your ex is -10, you have to be at 11. 

Email me at jack@silverbulletsurvivor.com.

In this episode, I reflect on this journey I've been on, and what I've learned from it. 

Email me at jack@silverbulletsurvivor.com.

In this episode, I talk about the things I wish I knew about family law before being in this horrible situation. 

Disclaimer: I am not a lawyer. I am not your lawyer. This is not legal advice. These are just things I wish I knew. If you have questions, contact a family law attorney and do a consultation. 

Email me at jack@silverbulletsurvivor.com.

In this episode, I talk about "father wounds" and its correlation to toxic masculinity. 

Email me at jack@silverbulletsurvivor.com.

In this episode, I talk about the silver lining of being a silver bullet survivor. I'm so much happier now than when I was in the marriage, and it's a lot easier for me to be grateful for the positive things in my life and to look forward to something that I'm excited about. 

Email me at jack@silverbulletsurvivor.com.

In this episode, I do a deep dive into the "discard" and why it is so destructive. 

Email me at jack@silverbulletsurvivor.com.

In this episode, I talk about CPS investigations and how to prepare for one. 

Email me at jack@silverbulletsurvivor.com.

In this episode, I talk about how to talk to your kids regarding the divorce and the situation in a way that makes sense to them and to establish yourself as the strong and stable parent. 

Email me at jack@silverbulletsurvivor.com.

In this episode, I discuss ways to think about and talk to your kids when they are angry. 

The coach I reference in this episode is Dr. Amy J.L. Baker. Her website is https://www.amyjlbaker.com. 

The book I reference in this episode is called "The Whole-Brain Child", by authors Daniel J. Siegel M.D. and Tina Payne Bryson. 

Email me at jack@silverbulletsurvivor.com.

In this episode, I talk about ways of getting over your ex. 

1. Take off the rose-colored glasses. 
2. Respect and love yourself. 
3. Realize your ex is not who you think they are. 

Email me at jack@silverbulletsurvivor.com.

In this episode, I talk about how to navigate co-parenting conflict and avoiding traps. In summary: 

1. Avoid verbal communications. 

2. Stick to written communications like emails. There are co-parenting apps like TalkingParents and OurFamilyWizard that works great for this. 

3. Respond with a canned response. 

4. Disengage. 

Email me at jack@silverbulletsurvivor.com.

In this episode, I discuss all the ways I was able to counter my ex's attempts at counter-parenting. 

Email me at jack@silverbulletsurvivor.com.

In this episode, I talk about the process of overcoming trauma from your ex and your kids. 

Email me at jack@silverbulletsurvivor.com.

In this episode, I talk about the importance of self-care through your emotional recovery. 

Email me at jack@silverbulletsurvivor.com.

In this episode, I discuss how I overcame the stigma of false allegations. 

Email me at jack@silverbulletsurvivor.com.

In this episode, I talk about the things I'm thankful for. 

Email me at jack@silverbulletsurvivor.com.

In this episode, I talk about the concepts behind Gentle Parenting. 

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In this episode, I talk about my Christmas holiday and the coparenting issues that arose. 

Email me at jack@silverbulletsurvivor.com.

In this episode, I talk about how people may weaponize therapy against you. 

Email me at jack@silverbulletsurvivor.com.

In this episode, I talk about the mindset of overcoming obstacles vs removing obstacles. 

Email me at jack@silverbulletsurvivor.com.

In this episode, I outline the documentation strategy that helped me get custody of my kids. In summary:

1. Take lots of pictures. 
2. Get a voice recorder and record visitations.
3. Get a dash cam and record exchanges.
4. After visitations, send yourself an email with a summary of the visit. 
5. Hire professionals to monitor you and write a report.

Email me at jack@silverbulletsurvivor.com.

In the episode, I discuss the unsavory aspects of healing. I also read and respond to a listener's letter about going through a similar situation. 

Email me at jack@silverbulletsurvivor.com.