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Pub. DateTitleDuration
10 May 2017Fat? Always Tired? No Sex Drive? This is why (feat. Jay Campbell of TRT Revolution)01:08:42

Important disclaimer: This podcast interview contains information about Testosterone Replacement Therapy. The information is not advice, and should not be treated as such. You must not rely on the information in this podcast interview as an alternative to medical advice from an appropriately qualified medical professional. If you have specific questions about any matter you should consult an appropriately qualified medical professional. If you think you may be suffering from any medical condition you should seek immediate medical attention. You should never delay seeking medical advice, disregard medical advice, or discontinue medical treatment because of information in this podcast interview.

In this episode of the Becoming the Alpha Muslim podcast I interview Jay Campbell, the founder of TRT Revolution and Fab Fit Over 40.

This interview is an introduction to Testosterone Replacement Therapy for those unfamiliar with the subject.

It serves as a supplement to my review of Jay's book, "The Definitive Testosterone Replacement Therapy MANual: How to Optimize Your Testosterone for Lifelong Health and Happiness."

Jay's book is available on Amazon in paperback and Amazon Kindle formats.

To read my review and get a FREE pdf copy of the book, you should click on this link:

http://becomingthealphamuslim.com/jay-campbell-testosterone-replacement-therapy

22 Oct 2016On the Spirituality of Strength with Alexander Juan Antonio Cortes01:28:53

Holistic Health and Well-Being

So here's the thing

I'm getting older - I'm in my mid-30s.

I'm a father.

My overall health is becoming more of a concern.

I don't recover from training as well as I used to.

It's getting harder to keep the weight off.

I can't eat as much as I used to.

I sometimes get indigestion, which never used to happen because I have a great digestive system, alhamdulillah.

I've started looking at my health and well-being holistically.

How my physical well-being ties into my mental and spiritual well-being, and vice versa.

Alexander Juan Antonio Cortes - Bodybuilder, Personal Trainer, Author

My guest today has a refreshing take on training and nutrition.

Part bodybuilder, part philosopher.

Part mystic, part alpha male.

Alexander Juan Antonio Cortes is a personal trainer with decades of experience both under the bar and as a teacher.

Aside from his personal website he is a regular contributor at Elite FTS, and has written for Mountain Dog Diet and TRT Revolution.

Alex currently trains and teaches at Relentless Performance, Vero Beach, Florida.

He is currently working on a book.

Follow him on Twitter - @aja_cortes

If you enjoyed this episode please leave me a rating/review on iTunes and Stitcher.

14 Jan 2019Boys in the Cave or BOYS CAVING IN?01:39:20

The Boys In The Cave podcast recently interviewed Becoming The Alpha Muslim. After publishing the episode, they faced criticism and pressure from SJW Muslims online. They caved to the pressure and took down the episode. Here is the full, unedited interview for your listening pleasure. 

Full show notes are available here: http://bit.ly/boysinthecave

11 Apr 2017Being an Arab Muslim Woman in Trump's America feat. Nour Goda of the Between Arabs Project)02:14:46

In this episode of the Becoming the Alpha Muslim podcast I welcome Nour Goda, founder and editor-in-chief of the Between Arabs Project, which is a website and podcast that brings together Arabs of all faiths and Muslims of all ethnicities to discuss social issues that plague our communities.

What I like about Nour's work and that of her colleagues at the Between Arabs Project, is its ability to take on difficult, polarizing conversations on relevant issues in the Muslim community in a constructive way.

Nour was gracious enough to invite me on her show soon after I launched Becoming the Alpha Muslim, and we recorded one of her best, if not the best, episodes.

So, it's high time I returned the favor.

Show Notes

  • What are the essential differences between Western and Eastern Muslims?
    • The relationship between race and religious identity.
    • The myth of freedom of religion in secular societies.
  • What's changed for Muslims living in Trump's America?
    • Trump as the continuation of endless imperialism and capitalist domination.
    • Better relationships with non-Muslims at the grass roots level.
    • The Islamophobia/victimhood narrative and hate-crime hoaxes by Muslims.
    • "Breaking stereotypes" and "pushing boundaries."
    •  Neo-orientalist fetishization of the Muslim woman.
  • Trump's recent airstrike on Syria
    • The Muslim armchair quarterback - overnight PhDs in political science and foreign policy
    • Forget the politics for a second, are the innocent Muslims safe?
    • What's a more productive way for Muslims to channel their outrage, instead of pontificating on social media?
      • Intellectual empathy, the principle of charity, and husn adh-dhann.
      • Listen more than you speak, ask more questions than you give opinions.
      • "Allah does not change the condition of a people until they change that which is within themselves."
  • WTF is Critical Race Theory?
    • How race, power, and law work to maintain "white supremacy."
    • The apex fallacy - do homeless white people have white supremacy too?
    • Is racial discrimination systemic or a reaction to life experiences?
    • Racial stereotypes - Ego Trip's Big Book of Racism.
  • Why should Muslims support Black Lives Matter (BLM?)
    • Getting back to the agenda of civil rights.
    • Opportunistic Muslim support of BLM not based on an Islamic paradigm.
    • A branding problem - the linguistic meaning of "black lives matter" vs. "Black Lives Matter" the organization.
    • The BLM organization, funded and led by radical liberals, feminists, and homosexuals - "Herstory," promoting LGBTQ, destroying the nuclear family.
    • The communal obligation of Muslims to invite people to Islam.
    • Secularism is not and has never been "live and let live."
    • Black-on-Black crime - why doesn't BLM care about this?
    • The subversion of movements for social change and the illusion of political protest.
    • Hotep vs. BLM - Hotep is a movement of self-improvement, self-reliance, self-accountability, and refusing to be victims. Shoutout to Uncle Hotep, @handymayhem on Twitter.
    • The two-pronged strategy of working to improve yourself and working to improve the system.
    • "You ain't ready to revolt against s***" - Killer Mike.
  • Older Muslim women finding it difficult to get married.
    • The marriage marketplace - men age like wine, women age like milk.
    • The Prophetic model of marriage.
    • How Feminism is destroying Muslim women's ability to find a husband.
    • The practical considerations of male-female attraction are human, not culture, and cannot be ignored.
    • Recipe for disaster - expecting a religious Muslim man in his 20s who has little-to-no experience with the opposite sex to marry an older woman.
    • How some Muslim women are "settling" just so they can have kids or marrying outside the faith.
    • How "I'm a strong, independent Muslim woman who don't need no man" is BS.
    • "The Wall" - the point of no-return for a Muslim woman.
    • What's wrong with marrying young? Don't make the halal so difficult that Muslims are forced into haram.
    • Marrying young needs enlightened, forward-thinking Muslim parents.
    • The current generation of Muslims is part of the global Islamic awakening.
  • Nour Goda's own experience as a divorcee trying to get re-married.
    • Marrying up - Nabeel Azeez's experience is not the norm.
    • The late 20s and early 30s are the new mid-20s when it comes to marriage in our times - education and parental pressure causing the delay.
    • Men and women with a "past" finding a partner willing to give them a chance.
    • Muslim women as victims of the sexualization of women in American culture.
    • Religious, virgin Muslim men who have no game or social skills with the opposite gender being brow-beating by the Muslim community to marry women who have previous sexual experience.
    • The nature of the male-female dynamic - how women's nature to let men lead has been beaten out of them by Feminism.
    • She wants to be your wife, not your mother - seduction, passion, romance, etc.
    • Men are not taught how to be men anymore - one of the motivations behind Becoming the Alpha Muslim.
    • Criticizing Feminism does not mean we are against women's rights.
    • Feminism has serious problems with respect to how it views men and masculinity.
    • Masculinity is attractive and should be appreciated.
    • P***y-whipped Muslim husbands are not a good look.
    • An Alpha woman is a beta wife with the right man.
    • Manosphere/Red-pill dating/relationship advice has a lot of overlap with Islam - shoutout to Pat Stedman, friend of Becoming the Alpha Muslim.
  • The Between Arab Project's upcoming work.
    • Live event at Connecticut College on April 14th, 2017 - details here.
    • Short hiatus from publishing new content for the past 4-5 months because of Nour's work commitments.
    • More content will be published on the Between Arabs Youtube channel - subscribe here.
  • How Feminism enslaves, not liberates, women.
    • Nour has written about this - Did Western.
    • How work-life balance is important for women and stay-at-home moms are looked down on.
    • How Feminism and Capitalism work hand-in-hand - the Corporate Overlords can't have 50% of the population not consuming.
    • The paradox of female happiness - the more liberation and equality women get, the more miserable they become.
    • One-in-four women have mental health issues and are on antidepressants.
    • Feminism encourages women to act against their fitrah (natural disposition.)
    • Allah prescribed different roles and responsibilities for men and women because as our Creator, He knows best how we ought to live so we can be happy.
  • Becoming the Alpha Muslim is not a misogynist website
    • Encouragement and support from female readers who, like Nour, have noticed the dysfunctional gender dynamics being promoted among Western Muslim communities.
    • This extended episode is a gift to my female readers, to thank them for their support.
  • On Western Muslims attempting to silence others and prevent difficult, yet necessary, conversations from happening.
    • How Nour/Between Arabs Project and the Mad Mamluks podcast take criticism from the community for associating with me.
    • On intellectual honesty, open discussion, exposing yourselves to ideas you disagree with or find offensive, and the spiritual growth that happens as a result.
    • Nour's journey through being an atheist and finding her way back to Islam, and how her faith is much stronger than it ever was. Related reading: Interview with an Ex-ex-Muslim.

If you enjoyed the episode...

Please leave me a rating and review on iTunes.

22 Sep 2018Muslim Men in Journalism: The World's Last Hope Against Fake News00:49:42

Late last year, I had the chance to sit down to talk to Hussein Kesvani about his work as a Muslim journalist. 

A lot happened between then and now that led to me not publishing this podcast episode soon after I recorded it. 

I figure now's as good a time as any.

Hussein Kesvani is the UK/Europe editor for Mel Magazine, a publication ostensibly about men and masculinity (though I would argue it's perpetuating modern degeneracy and promoting men being Soyboys.)

This is most certainly a black mark against Hussein, who is otherwise a fine fellow and an accomplished, non-hacky journalist. 

He's also written for Buzzfeed, Vice, The Independent, The Guardian, The New Statesman, The Shortlist, and Refinery29. 

He's a co-host of the No Country For Brown Men Podcast and also the Trash Future podcast.

Here's what we talked about during our short chat:

25 Jul 2017Is Halal Dating...Halal? (Special Guest: Soraya Soobhany Chohan)00:38:35

In this podcast, we are going to do a deep-dive (sort of) into halal dating.

As surprising as it sounds, 20% of my readers are women.

Some of them even e-mail me asking for help with their boy problems.

They're usually a hot mess (as women are when they catch feels) but Alhamdulillah I was able to help them avoid potential disasters.

On top of that, as you know, I review matrimonial apps for Becoming the Alpha Muslim.

I would say about half, or a little more than half, of the women looking to get married, are in their 30s and 40s.

A lot of these women are divorcees but as just as many have never been married.

Which is a little weird, honestly.

This being the case, I was SO glad when Soraya Soobhany-Chohan contacted me asking if I'd like to have her on my podcast.

Soraya is a relationship and marriage coach for single Muslim women in their 30s and older.

She herself got married well into her 30s AFTER 14 years of looking. We plan, and Allah plans. And Allah is the Best of planners. Ordinarily, I would have said "no" because my audience is mostly male. However, when I

We plan, and Allah plans. And Allah is the Best of planners. Ordinarily, I would have said "no" because my audience is mostly male. However, when I

And Allah is the Best of planners. Ordinarily, I would have said "no" because my audience is mostly male. However, when I

Ordinarily, I would have said "no" because my audience is mostly male. However, when I

However, when I internet stalked her researched her business I noticed we both have similar ideas on gender roles, masculinity, femininity, marriage, and relationships. The pre-interview phone call we did confirmed that.

The pre-interview phone call we did confirmed that.

In this interview, Soraya and I talk about:

  • What does Single Muslima Solutions offer women? How many women has she helped and are there success stories?
  • Why did it take Soraya so long to get married? What did she do wrong? And what did she do to fix it?
  • What's the right way to look for a husband? What do single Muslimas need to look for?
  • What is Halal Dating? Is it even halal? What are the boundaries of interaction? How do you avoid bad situations? When do you involve the male guardian?
  • On men being men and women being women. Halal dating tips for guys and girls
  • What are guys REALLY looking for in a spouse?
  • Why should guys go for older women (in their 30s and 40s) as opposed to younger women (18s and early 20s)? What benefits do older women bring to the table?
  • Why aren't more of these women considering polygyny as an option? Does it make sense for a 40-year old divorcee to say "I don't want to be a second wife?"
  • Soraya's top tip for single Muslimas on their first meeting with a guy: DO NOT fall into this trap

If you want to read a full transcript of the interview...

AND get details about a FREE e-mail course Soraya offers single Muslim women...

AND find out where you can find more of Soraya's work...

Click on this link- http://becomingthealphamuslim.com/halal-dating/

27 Oct 2018Muslimah Serial Entrepreneur Hodan Ibrahim on Minority Business Owners, Self-Worth, Feminism, Polygyny, and More01:40:04

I first came across Hodan Ibrahim in 2016, when she basically dropped everything she was doing in Canada and moved to Dubai to organize and host M-Powered Summit.

This was a first-of-its-kind conference on Muslim startups and entrepreneurship.

I ended up interviewing her and her co-founder for Ilmfeed, and also did writeups of the event.

I haven't seen one like it, since.

She hosted another, similar conference in Malaysia then next year, and has since moved on to bigger and better things.

You see, Hodan is a serial entrepreneur.

So the easiest thing that I did, and the hardest thing that I did, was becoming an entrepreneur. Um, it's, it's who I am. And I started out by failing a bunch of times and having little digital startups. The first company that worked out for me was a digital marketing agency that I had, um, and Alhamdulillah, after like three months. I went full-time on that.

Being an entrepreneur is "cool" now...every other Instagram profile has the title splashed across their bio.

But Hodan was in the entrepreneurship Game long before it was even a thing.

As a first-generation, Somali-Canadian immigrant Muslim (her family fled because of the war,) she ticked multiple minority status boxes...

And frequently found herself the only black woman in a room full of white men.

There was not a single person of color in any of these rooms that could understand my perspective...I remember one incident where I went to CBC (Canadian Broadcasting Corporation.) This was the first event that I ever did, in Ottawa, and it was about supporting entrepreneurs of color. And I went and got an interview with the CBC, and they're just like, "Why does it matter if an entrepreneur is a person of color?...why can't you just learn from all types of entrepreneurs? Why don't you have white entrepreneurs?"

None of this stopped her.

What's interesting to me is how she didn't let her hamster run wild and create a narrative of victimhood (Feminism, Patriarchy, Toxic Masculinity, yadda yadda yadda.)

She just did what she had to do to get where she needed to go.

And it was her faith that aided her.

In this episode of the Becoming the Alpha Muslim podcast, Hodan and I talk about:

  • Being a minority business owner as a first generation Somali-Canadian immigrant black Muslimah
  • The historical context behind attitudes toward Muslim women today
  • Feminism (and why Muslim women don't need it)
  • How Muslim women can develop their self-worth and happiness
  • Why she's pro-polygyny and thinks its the best relationship arrangement for her personality and lifestyle
  • And a bunch of other topics

For complete show notes, visit our blog:

https://becomingthealphamuslim.com/muslimah-serial-entrepreneur-hodan-ibrahim

06 Oct 2017The Cat-and-Mouse Game of Male-Female Interaction01:13:04

Continuing with our theme of featuring Muslim male content creators, my guest this episode is Youtuber Abu American Little.

On his channel, Abu American teaches young Muslim and non-Muslim men about masculinity, male self-improvement, and gender dynamics. 

He joins me to teach us about modern gender dynamics and how the Muslim community is affected by it, particularly in regards to our relationships with our wives.

Important Note

This interview will be a hard listen for most women and some men because very few of us have heard gender-relations spoken about this way. 

While listening, you must keep in mind what we are speaking about men and women generally, addressing the norms in our society.  

Many rulings in our religion address what is 'aadee, i.e. the norm in a community.

Our books of fiqh deal with what is generally true. Exceptions are dealt with on a case-by-case basis, by referring to scholars.

With that in mind, understand that generalizations are not universalizations.

Show Notes:

  • [01:30] There is a difference between being a good man and being good at being a man. They are not equal.
  • [02:00] Abu American teaches his audience about masculinity and gender-dynamics in modern society. His background as a black convert in his 40s gives his the experience and perspective to help the young men who subscribe to his channel.
  • [04:30] Asking women about how men should deal with women is like asking fish how to be a fisherman. Women have zero experience on relationships with women as a man. Only a man can tell you the male perspective on deal with women, and this comes with time and experience.
  • [07:10] Solipsism and the difficulty women have with abstract thought. Women will take a statement, no matter how general, and interpret it only from her perspective and how she FEELS about it, as opposed to objectively.
  • [11:05] Hypergamy and female mating strategy. Hypergamy is women’s natural instinct to pursue and secure the commitment of the highest value men available to her. This is a major reason why many Muslim women are in their 30s and unmarried: they don’t marry down.
  • [16:35] Men are not attracted to women’s education and career achievement. They are attracted to youth and beauty. Muslim should get married as early as possible. Both she and her partner can grow in value and her husband will always be in a higher position than her.
  • [20:30] A woman who marries down or surpasses her husband in status will start to lose respect and resent him. It is not an active thing. It’s a passive thing in the nature of women. Women don’t want to be leaders, they want to be led.
  • [22:00] Who are the “Alphas” in the Muslim community? Since Islam does not allow extra-marital sex and we don’t view professional/financial success in the aspirational way non-Muslims do, the Alphas are the preachers and people of knowledge. These are the men Muslim women lust after.
  • [24:05] Muslimah fangirls/groupies are OK with chasing after and getting a preacher’s romantic attention, even if it violates Islam, until they find out he’s also doing the same with other fangirls. What makes you so special, shorty?
  • [26:40] Build it and they will come. The more you build yourself up as a man - socially, physically, professionally, financially - the more women will want you. And it’s going to be difficult that temptation, but you must.
  • [27:10] There has been a generational decline of testosterone and sperm counts in men in the West.
  • [28:10] Muslim marriage websites and apps: low-value women have developed an inflated sense of worth and unrealistic expectations of what kind of men they can get as a husband. This is due to Gynocentrism, a sociocultural phenomenon which exclusively focuses on the views, needs, and concerns of women. It pervades, politics, religion, media, and popular culture.
  • [32:20] Statistics show women are at an all-time high for being unhappy.
  • [34:00] Muslim preachers and public figures in the West constantly put Muslim women on a pedestal and pander to them. We are mirroring the Christian church in their being hijacked by the Feminine Imperative.
  • [34:40] Increasing public statements by Muslim public figures, male and female, trying to brow-beat Muslim men who have never been married before into marrying older women (30+), divorcees, widows, etc. Female fertility falls off a cliff at 27 years old if she has not had a prior successful pregnancy.
  • [37:10] From a practical stance, women with children should be taken on as co-wives, or if the husband is himself divorced or widowed. Women carry a lot of emotional baggage from previous relationships. The more prior sexual partners she has had, the greater the chance she will separate from her current partner.
  • [40:00] What is a woman doing when she does or says something to deliberately disrespect you, just to see how you will react? Explaining the fitness test / congruence test / s*** test. Men should understand this is an expression of sexual interest in the man she is testing.
  • [43:10] “Not all women are like that! Why are you making such broad-brush statements about women?”
  • [44:30] A lot of men are ego-invested in their fantasy of what women are and how they perceive female virtue. When you disrupt this with a different model, it is jarring to their identity and worldview, and they lash out.
  • [45:30] Men are the true romantics. Women are relationship pragmatists. You are never going to be loved by a woman for who you are. You will only be loved because of what you can do for her now.
  • [47:30] Coconut Knights: Muslim white knights. Some of the most prominent white knights in the Muslim community are in their 30s and single. Muslim women will cheer them on but will never marry them because they are not looking for a woman with a penis as a husband.
  • [48:30] Just like women don’t like feminine men, men don’t like masculine women. They want feminine, soft, gentle, caring women.
  • [50:00] Psycho-simps: when a beta-male, so invested in his idea of acceptance and romantic attention from women, gets rejected by the woman he desires, he snaps and becomes violent.
  • [51:15] DO NOT have a scarcity mindset with regard to women, even your own wife.
  • [52:00] Are there no more traditional women left? There are, but they mostly exist in the East, not in the West. The way to get a Western woman to be traditional is to build yourself up into a high-value man, because 80% of the women want the top 20% of men. You do this by learning Game (only for the purpose of establishing and maintaining an Islamic marriage), physical improvement, and financial improvement.
  • [53:20] Women are straight-up gangster when dealing with men. Machiavellian and ruthless.
  • [53:40] If you become a high-value man, women will do what it takes to secure your commitment in a relationship, including behaving in a traditional way.
  • [54:00] The Game never ends. Before marriage, you must build attraction. After marriage, you must build desire. The reality is your women-folk, if they are on social media, receive countless offers and solicitations from men. You can never become complacent. Women WANT you to be good at seduction and romance. They want you to use Game on them.
  • [56:30] Using exceptions to negate what is generally true. Women’s casual disrespect of the Prophet when they bring up his marriage to Khadijah. There are two false premises here. The first is the claim she was 40 when she married him, while it is more authentically narrated she was 28. The second is the claim he was her employee when in fact it was a partnership; she provided the financing while he handled operations.
  • [59:30] “A woman’s first directive is to defend her sex’s imperatives even before consideration of religious conviction, marriage vows, or espoused personal ideology.” - Rollo Tomassi, the Rational Male
  • [1:00:10] Distorting the religion to fit their needs. Muslim women cheering events in Algeria, allowing Muslim women to marry non-Muslim men.
  • [1:01:30] Competition anxiety. Nothing is more attractive to a woman than a man other women want. Muslim men can use competition anxiety to improve their marital relationships by taking co-wives. Women don’t really have a problem with polygyny and sharing their man. If they do have a problem with you taking co-wives, you’re not really the man she wants, you’re the man she could get.
  • [1:02:30] The onus is on men to build ourselves up and improve ourselves up until we have command over our relationships with our wives. Problems in your marriage usually stem from you not fulfilling your role as a leader.
  • [1:04:30] Women view weakness with contempt. The lie we are told is women want a man who is in touch with his emotions, who isn’t afraid to cry etc., when in fact that’s not what she wants at all.
  • [1:05:10] “In reality no matter how much a woman appears to have her s*** together, she is only rejection, one personal slight, one flat tire away from a hysterical episode. Despite what feminists would have us believe, women really cannot survive without the support of men. This is why women will forgive men for anything except weakness, because a weak man is to a woman what one drowning person is to another drowning person. At best useless, at worst dangerous. Women are hard-wired not only to avoid weak men but to ruthlessly be hostile towards them.” - Rollo Tomassi, the Rational Male
  • [1:06:08] When your woman tells you she wants you to be more open and emotional, that’s a fitness test. She’s probing for weakness.
  • [1:06:50] “I was filled with disgust and revulsion when looking at him”
  • [1:07:30] Isn’t this entire discussion misogynistic and anti-Islamic? No. We love our wives and daughters, and want the best for them. Examples: all the ayahs and hadiths about the rights of the husband over the wife, gender dynamics, etc.
  • [1:12:00] Please subscribe to Abu American’s Youtube channel and hit the “bell” to receive notifications when he publishes new content.

Full show notes are available on my website: http://becomingthealphamuslim.com/abu-american-little 

21 Feb 2017Who is Allah? (Non-Muslims Should Listen Too)00:29:04

My Short-lived Career as a Preacher

A few years ago I had a brief stint as a Jumuah Khateeb (someone who delivers the sermon at Friday Mass.)

I took it very seriously – I wrote all of my sermons myself – and was well received.

Ideally, the Friday sermon should be very inspiring and an immediate boost to the faith of the congregants meant to encourage and sustain them for the entire week.

I’m a big proponent of drilling the fundamentals, so in one of my sermons I explained the meaning of la ilaha illa Allah (one-half of the Muslim testimony of faith.)

It was quality work but that’s not why I mention it.

I mention it because of the reaction of the congregants.

One of them, an elderly gentleman, said,

“We’ve been saying it our entire lives, but no one actually explained to us what it means, the way you did.”

Keep in mind, this is as fundamental as you can get.

Our children should know it as well as they know their own names.

Religious Literacy, Religious Literacy, Religious Literacy

In a time where celebrity preachers routinely rubbish the study of Islamic creed, is it any wonder religious literacy among the Muslim masses is trash?

Instead, these same preachers will do advanced Quran Studies with an audience, many of whom don’t know the basic fundamentals of their religion.

FYI, this is the opposite of what the Companions of Prophet Muhammad ﷺ would do.

It was narrated that Jundub bin ‘Abdullah (may Allah be pleased with him) said:

We were with the Prophet (ﷺ), and we were strong youths, so we learned faith before we learned Qur’an. Then we learned Qur’an and our faith increased thereby.

[Source: Sunan Ibn Majah]

Becoming the Alpha Muslim Don’t Play That

As woke Muslim men and readers of this website you shouldn’t fall into the same trap.

So, to help improve your understanding of Islamic creed, here is my sermon in full.

I have added sub-headings to make it easier for you to read.

Non-Muslims Should Read this Too

If you are a non-Muslim this is probably the most important post of mine you will ever read.

Few non-Muslims get exposed to such a detailed explanation of the core of our faith.

Fewer still get exposed to a Friday sermon in English.

My hope for this post is that we all, Muslim and non-Muslim, walk away spiritually energized.

May Allah make it so.

http://becomingthealphamuslim.com/who-is-allah 

Please Subscribe, and Leave a Rating and Review on iTunes

Becoming the Alpha Muslim on iTunes

 

13 Nov 2017How to Learn Math even if You ain't that Smart (feat. Ed Latimore)01:15:02

 

For complete show notes, visit: http://becomingthealphamuslim.com/meta-learning

I know what you're thinking:

What the hell does learning math have to do with Becoming the Alpha Muslim?

I'll tell you what. 

The Islamic Sacred Tradition is one of deep learning and transmission, so much so that entire books were written on the art of learning.

More recently, the subject of meta-learning has become popular due to bloggers like Tim Ferriss, Cal Newport, and Scott H. Young.

I don't know any of these guys, but I do know someone who I believe is somewhat of an authority on the subject. 

My guest this episode is Ed Latimore. Ed is a professional heavyweight boxer, physicist, published author, and self-improvement blogger.

I invited him on to teach us how to learn math and, more broadly, speak about the subject of meta-learning.

Ed is in an interesting position to speak about this subject because he entered university at the not-quite-old but certainly not young age of 28. As well, he gets punched in the head for a living. 

Both of these factors combined mean Ed had to take a deliberate and systematic approach to learning. One that he can now pass on to us.

Enjoy.

Show Notes

  • [2:20] Ed's life circumstances necessitated that he learn HOW to learn so he can be successful at university and this had the added benefit of making him a good teacher
  • [3:12] We live in an age where information is free. Because of this, the ability to process information soundly and efficiently has become priceless
  • [4:25] Has entering university at 28 (as opposed to 18) and getting punched in the head for a living affected Ed's ability to learn?
  • [5:30] When you are older, the tools you have available to learn are different than when you are younger, for example
    • Young people don't have the concept of limitation, which is a plus, while adults have a better idea of what's possible
    • Young people don't have the concept of failure, while adults understand that failure is not the be-all-end-all
    • Young people learn as a matter of immersion, while adults know how to learn
  • [9:35] As an adult you understand that the process of learning gets results no matter your natural aptitude. As long as you apply yourself over time, you will get better
  • [13:30] How much does natural ability affect learning math? Yes, a high IQ helps, but does that mean you can't achieve a level of success? The world is not only composed of high IQ people.
  • [17:00] Whether talent is real or not is irrelevant. What matters is whether you are using your belief in it to motivate yourself or to justify your weakness and lack of trying
  • [17:39] If we take Goku and Vegeta as an example, Vegeta doesn't just accept that Goku is better than him and quit. He has an intrinsic belief in himself, as a pureblood Saiyan, that pushes him to train harder and harder and reach new heights
  • [19:50] Walk around with the confidence Vegeta had when he let Cell absorb Android 18. That's the lie you must tell yourself about talent
  • [21:00] When Ed decided to go back to school he knew that even though he was weak at math, given enough time, he could learn anything. So he started learning almost a year out. In having this mindset you learn the most valuable talent to have is hard work
  • [22:50] Because had to learn these subjects the hard way, he is more proficient at teaching it than many high school teachers. The guy who doesn't have the most natural talent is always the best coach
  • [25:20] Why should you study math? It's because math is just a series of relationships. If you can learn to think in terms of these abstract relationships, you can apply this skill to almost every aspect of your life
  • [28:50] If you've watched A Beautiful Mind, the Nash Equilibrium was discovered because of Game, and trying to pick up girls (yes, I'm aware this is a fictionalized account). There's a reason the most high-paying careers have a math component
  • [29:57] You don't lift weights because you regularly encounter barbell- and dumbbell-shaped objects you need to pick up and move around. You lift them because they make all the physical activity in your life much easier. Mathematics is weight-lifting for your brain
  • [31:40] When you first start learning, you start by learning tactically and solving as many problems as possible until it becomes mechanical. Eventually, the problems will become harder and they won't be straightforward to solve. Then you have to move from HOW to WHY, and this is where you gain a deeper understanding of the subject matter
  • [36:10] Your final aim should be, "how can I understand this well enough to explain it to someone without using mathematical terminology?"
  • [38:30] Bruce Lee said, "the three stages of learning are:
    • A punch is just a punch
    • A punch is no longer just a punch
    • A punch is just a punch"
  • [40:00] Ed's studies directly help him in his day-to-day life. For example, learning math affects the way he operates on Twitter because he understands network effects. Learning physics makes him a much better boxer
  • [45:30] Understanding momentum, power, impulse, and how they apply to boxing
  • [50:00] Why should never use AP math credits in university, especially if you are in a technical major
  • [54:30] Understanding math helps you become more analytical in everyday life situations and puts some finesse in your game, so you can save time and energy
  • [56:30] Ed has increased his proficiency in mathematics to a point where he sees his limitations. While he would certainly like to take his understanding to the next level, he will likely only achieve this if he pursues graduate education in mathematics. You don't know how far you can be pushed until you need to be pushed that far
  • [58:05] To go further than undergraduate-level math proficiency, the key is more immersion. Once you have improved to one plateau there is no reason you can't improve to a higher one. Your only limitations are time and effort (not talent). Your growth will become logarithmic (i.e. diminishing returns)
  • [1:01:30] I tell Ed about the North-African tradition of learning; writing on wooden tablets, memorizing didactic poetry, and teaching what they learn (even to a tree or an animal)
  • [1:03:30] The ability to learn instills self-confidence. "I did this difficult thing...what else can I do?" For Ed, getting through the Physics program means he can do anything he puts his mind to
  • [1:08:00] At the very least, learning math gives you the ability to see relationships and make connections between seemingly unrelated topics and aspects of life. It also makes you a more interesting or fun person
  • [1:09:10] Ed recommends The Art of Learning by Josh Waitzkin and A Mind for Numbers by Barbara Oakley
  • [1:10:35] Nabeel recommends A Mathematician's Lament by Paul Lockhart and A Mathematicians Apology by G.H. Harvey
  • [1:13:15] Ed's book, Not Caring What Other People Think is a Superpower, is available on Kindle and Paperback
07 Mar 2017Why Fatherhood is how Empires are Built (Special Guest: Neil White)01:01:01

Why aren't there any popular Muslim Dad Blogs?

Maybe there are, but I sure as hell haven't seen them.

Technically this is a good thing because it means the dads are out earning a living to provide for their families.

It's also a bad thing because this means the online Islamic discourse is dominated by women and, sadly, Feminists at that.

You may have also noticed, if you read them, the Dad Blogs which do exist read like they were written by women or effeminate men.

Which brings me to my guest, Neil white, who is the founder of This Dad Does, a blog for "dads who do more."

I enjoy reading him because his writing is masculine and he has traditional ideas about fatherhood.

So, I thought it would be a good idea to have him on because:

  • I haven't written or podcasted about fatherhood before
  • This Dad Does fits with our theme here at Becoming the Alpha Muslim.

Topics discussed

  • Who is Neil White?
  • The virtue of having daughters in Islam
  • Why did Neil start This Dad Does?
  • What sort of topics does Neil write about?
  • Blogging side-discussion
  • Why does every dad blog sound like it's been written by a huge fag?
  • Dad Blogs as a blank canvas for Advertising and PR agencies
  • Why are mainstream media and popular culture trying so hard to emasculate and feminize fathers?
  • What is the role of the father in the Current Year?
  • How is the father-son relationship different to the father-daughter relationship?
  • Neil is working on a book

You can find complete show notes here: Why Fatherhood is how Empires are Built

P.S. Don't forget to leave me a rating and review on iTunes

09 Dec 2017How to Network like a Pro (feat. Jay Campbell)01:11:34

Every Muslim man needs to learn how to network in a way that is natural and doesn't seem fake. The key here is to not BE fake. To genuinely be interested in people and want to invest in the relationship.

Today, I'm talking to Jay Campbell, a repeat guest on the Becoming the Alpha Muslim podcast. Jay is one of the best natural networkers I have ever seen, and a master at making feel important and appreciated.

People don't remember what you said. They remember how you made them feel.

During the discussion, you're going to hear us talk about:

  • How to introduce yourself to strangers and what to say to make them feel comfortable
  • How to stay present and give your conversation partner the attention he deserves
  • How to look for areas of commonality and mutual interest
  • How to proceed past the initial interaction to create a deeper relationship
  • How to maintain contact with a large network and keep relationships warm
  • And a few other related topics

For complete show notes, visit: http://becomingthealphamuslim.com/how-to-network-like-a-pro

26 Nov 2017Second Amendment Muslims and the Islamic Obligation of Self-Defense00:56:34

In this episode of the Becoming the Alpha Muslim podcast we are talking to Hussein, a Muslim Chicagoan and the founder of the Streets of Cordoba podcast. It's a brand new podcast focusing on Muslim issues in the West. 

I invited him on to talk about the Second Amendment, self-defense, defending one's family, and related issues.

Show Notes:

  • [03:30] How would you explain the Second Amendment to a FOB (Fresh Off the Boat)?
    • When the British were defeated in 1776, there was a debate over the role of government
    • The second amendment was drafted as a failsafe in case the government reverted back to British rule, as well as for self-defense
    • The purpose of an armed militia comprised of free citizens is to defend against citizens usurping the rights of others and to defend against foreign aggressors
  • [07:50] The debate over the second amendment isn't new. It has been going on for centuries.
    • E.g. Supreme Court rulings in the past forbade black slaves from owning firearms. In the '30s, there was a law banning silencers
    • In recent years, gun ownership has become increasingly popular and a politicized issue, so the debate has become more prominent in the media
  • [09:50] On the argument that modern firearms are vastly different than those that existed during the time when the second amendment was written
    • There is a misconception about semi-automatic weapons. People confuse them with fully-automatic weapons.
    • There are several historical examples of semi-automatic and automatic firearms from the mid-18th to mid-19th centuries
    • Implicit in this argument is that the Founding Fathers had no concept of technological advancement
    • Also implied is that the U.S. Constitution can only be interpreted in the light of late 18th century America
  • [15:30] Which way do U.S. Muslims lean on gun ownership and gun control
    • The shooting range Hussein frequents is full of Muslims training
    • 1st generation immigrant Muslims may sometimes have an inferiority complex so they behave like second-class citizens and are reluctant to exercise their constitutional rights
    • Indian Muslims tend to be anti-2A; Pakistani Muslims tend to be pro-2A
  • [18:30] The Islamic obligation of self-defense
    • Abu Hurayrah (may Allah be pleased with him) said: "A man came to the Messenger of Allaah (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) and said: 'O Messenger of Allaah, what do you think if a man comes wanting to take my property?' He said: 'Do not give him your property.' He said: 'What if he fights me?' He said: 'Fight him.' He said: 'What if he kills me?' He said: 'Then you will be a martyr. He said: 'What if I kill him?' He said: 'He will be in Hell.' [Sahih Muslim]
    • It is from the man's Qawwamah that he be able and prepared to defend himself, his family and property from harm 
  • [21:00] The U.S. political climate in recent years has made self-defense more necessary than ever for Muslims
    • Several U.S. Muslim scholars have spoken about gun ownership and many own firearms
    • Dr. Yasir Qadhi has mentioned on social media he has a concealed carry permit
    • Imam Suhaib Webb once did a Snapchat proudly displaying his new gun
    • Imam Marc Manley is a member of the MRA
    • Sheikh Ilyas Lahoz of Safina Society mentioned being pro-2A and enjoying hunting during an episode of their podcast
  • [23:40] Laws and regulations around firearm ownership
    • There are a few federal laws
    • Each state has its own laws related to who is permitted to own and purchase firearms
    • Most states require training and to pass a test before you can get a concealed carry permit
    • Go online and become familiar with your local laws
  • [28:00] Practical tips for situational awareness
    • Whether you are carrying a firearm on your person or not, you should always be aware of your surroudings 
    • You need the right gear and accessories to carry a concealed weapon e.g. special belts, holsters
    • There are lots of resources online, e.g. Youtube has a large gun enthusiast community
    • You need to get comfortable wearing and walking around with a firearm
  • [31:35] What size gun should you buy if you want to carry concealed? 
    • It depends on your personal preference and what you are comfortable carrying
    • Being able to draw, wield, and fire your weapon smoothly and confidently is extremely important, and this will also affect your choice
    • Most important is training and practice; you want to reach a level of unconscious competence in using whichever firearm you own
  • [34:30] What is dry firing practice?
    • It is when you practice pulling the trigger of an unloaded firearm to improve your technique and to get used to pulling the trigger
  • [36:45] You need to practice your marksmanship once a week. At the very least, you should go to the shooting range once every two weeks
  • [38:45] How to carry your weapon in the masjid
    • Some states don't allow carrying weapons in any place of worship (not so in Illinois, where Hussein lives)
    • Most people are in their own world and not observing the people around them
    • As long as your weapon is fully concealed, no one will notice
  • [41:00] Most people are in Condition White. You must be Condition Yellow. 
  • [42:40] Most police officers have dealt with people with concealed carry permits
    • "Officer, I just want to let you know I have a concealed carry permit and I am carrying right now." 
    • Give the officer control of the situation to put him at ease
    • Don't say, "Officer, I have a gun" like Philando Castile
    • If you have a concealed carry permit, you're much less likely to get a ticket
  • [46:40] How to spot people who might be carrying a firearm
  • [48:45] How do you defend your home?
    • Your family should be educated, trained, and comfortable around firearms
    • Store your weapons in quick-lock safes so they are ready to go in the event you have to use them
  • [52:40] The Streets of Cordoba - a podcast for Muslims talking about contemporary issues in an inclusive and non-polarizing way
23 May 2017How to keep Strength Training in Ramadan (or Powerlifting, Weightlifting, Bodybuilding)00:18:07

In this episode of Becoming the Alpha Muslim, I go over Ramadan Strength Training.

I cover the terrible advice that's available online (explaining why it's so bad,) and give you my recommendations on what I think you should do instead.

I also tell you what I'm going to be experimenting with this Ramadan in terms of my own training and nutrition.

Important: I am not a doctor and don't play one on the internet. If you are considering implementing any of the information in this podcast or the accompanying blog post, please consult a qualified medical doctor first.

To read the show notes click here: Ramadan Strength Training: The Definitive Guide (Updated)

27 Feb 2017How to Re-Ignite Your Sex Life (Special Guest: Pat Stedman)00:55:35

The idea for this episode came to mind while I was listening to the Mad Mamluks - shoutout to Mahim, SIM, Sheikh Amir, and Mort.

A few weeks ago they had a psychologist on a few weeks ago, who is a relationship consultant.

The topic of dead bedrooms came up.

It was a good discussion and there was some good advice given.

However, I felt like they didn't really nail the issue.

The problem is, we tend to neglect the fact that the female has her own sexuality and sexual arousal.

We tend to think of lust and desire as something solely male, as opposed to male and female.

When that happens we look at sex a certain away.

The other thing (and it's morally a good thing) is that most religiously observant Muslims don't have sexual experience outside of marriage.

So, when we're talking about sexuality I think it's important for us to understand it as it is, and only then apply our moral framework to it.

In order to do that, I decided to invite a dating and relationship coach - Patrick Stedman.

Pat and I follow each other on Twitter and I am a reader of his blog, which is where I got the idea to have him on.

He got into relationship coaching because he had a poor track record interacting with women until he took the time to learn the skills he needed.

His work paid off - his own romantic life improved considerably and he's helped a lot of men improve their own.

He's married now, and his skill-set carries over to the relationship he has with his wife.

This is great for us because he's relatable and he understands the relationship dynamics in a marriage.

Topics Covered

  • Marriage is dating on hard mode
  • What are Frame and Frame Control?
  • Pre-selection, one of the 3 pillars of attraction
  • Married men letting themselves go
  • Transactional thinking with regard to sex
    • The two problems with transactional sex
    • Is a relationship like a car? Do you have to keep filling up the gas tank?
  • The top 3 things to understand about women when it comes to sex
    • Don't overcommunicate
    • The hypergamous nature of women
    • How to signal your desire
  • A side-discussion on business strategy
  • Lifting weights helps with Presence
  • The importance of confidence
  • Pat's #1 seduction special move
  • Using dominant body language

Show Notes 

Complete show notes are available on my website.

Read: How to re-ignite your sex life

Show Me Some Love

Please subscribe and leave me a rating and review on iTunes.

26 Aug 2017Twitter Masterclass: How to Get 20k+ Highly Engaged Followers the Old-Fashioned Way00:35:28

9 THINGS YOU’LL LEARN IN THIS TWITTER MASTERCLASS:

  • One, why Twitter is hands-down THE best platform for growing a loyal, engaged audience
  • Two, how often you need to tweet to see results and can you automate them?
  • Three, why growing an audience is like raising an army
  • Four, the 6 crucial lessons for Twitter success you absolutely CANNOT do without
  • Five, why getting verified might actually be a bad thing
  • Six, why having an overall theme is essential for consistent growth
  • Seven, how to select who you follow and how to get good at crafting tweets
  • Eight, the two biggest mistakes people make on Twitter
  • Nine, how to deal with TROLLS

 

My guest today is professional heavy-weight boxer, personal-development blogger, and self-published author Ed Latimore.

Full show notes at http://dropkickcopy.com/grow-your-twitter

 

07 Sep 2017Who are the Alt-Right, Really? (Special Guest - @Ali)01:22:11

My guest this episode is Ali Abdul Razaq Akbar. He's a political consultant and digital media strategist for the Republican party.

He joins me to talk about the origins of the Alt-Right and the New Right, and the differences between the two. We also talk about a bunch of related topics ranging from Donald Trump to postmodernism, to 4Chan. 

Highlights from the Show

  • [00:25] What is the Gell-Mann Amnesia effect and why it is screwing up the way we Muslims understand reality?
  • [04:10] How does someone with a name like Ali Abdul Razaq Akbar end up a) a Southern Baptist Christian and b) a Republican political consultant?
  • [06:25] What is Ali's pedigree and credibility in the Republican party and how did he become a VIP with a massive network?
  • [10:02] What is the true story of the founding of the Tea Party movement and what did Ali have to do with it?
  • [13:36] How Ali went from actively opposing Donald Trump's entry into Republican politics in 2011, to meeting and hanging out with him in 2014, to not supporting him in the 2016 Republican primaries, to finally becoming a Trump supporter
  • [21:48] Why Ali thinks Feminism and other postmodernist movements are a greater threat to America than terrorism
  • [23:00] Ali and I take a deep dive into the origins of the Alt-Right...Where did it come from? Who coined the term? What is its ideological or political make-up?
  • [25:30] Who are the major Alt-Right public figures?
  • [28:35] How are Neo-Nazis, White Supremacists, the Ku Klux Klan etc. connected to the Alt-Right?
  • Why do Neo-Nazis, KKK, and White Supremacists in the Alt-Right reject Donald Trump?
  • [35:00] Why do the Alt-Right have a love-hate relationship with Jews and Muslims?
  • [37:06] Who are the "New Right"? Are they an off-shoot of the Alt-Right or are they something completely different?
  • [43:10] Why did some New Right figures associate with the Alt-Right before distancing themselves from the group?
  • [49:15] Branding is everything...the media is everything...why no one cares if the Alt-Right really are Neo-Nazis
  • [53:10] If reality is a social construct, whoever controls the media controls reality
  • [55:45] Who are the major New Right public figures?
  • [59:05] Why are foreigners (non-Americans) like Milo Yiannopolous, Paul Joseph Watson, Stefan Molyneux, and Lauren Southern so influential in the New Right and Alt-Right?
  • [1:03:50] Ali and I break down the meaning and significance of memes, memetic warfare, and meme magic
  • [1:07:30] Was Hillary Clinton really sick or did Trump supporters give her the Evil Eye? 
  • [1:10:10] Where does /pol/ (4chan) fit into all of this?
  • [1:15:00] The grand social experiment being conducted by /pol/
  • [1:15:53] Why Ali and I are agents of controlled chaos, and how we operate as interdimensional travelers on the internet.
  • [1:18:46] Why are living in the era of "based" thinking - the great mistake of believing Nationalism is spreading around the world
  • [1:20:45] Where can you find Ali online?

You can find complete show notes here: http://becomingthealphamuslim.com/new-right-vs-alt-right

16 Sep 2017Becoming a Muslim Content Creator (feat. @themadmamluks)03:03:33

In this episode I speak to SIM, Mort, and Mahin, of the Mad Mamluks podcast. They've been podcasting for around a year and a half and I wanted them to tell the story of their journey as content creators.

We talk about:

  • What motivated SIM to start the show,
  • their views on the quality of production required to get the attention of a Muslim audience,
  • their strategies for growing the podcast and where their main growth comes from,
  • how they present themselves to the world in a Muslim community that is not used to open and frank discussion on controversial issues,
  • how they deal with criticism and haters and how they differentiate between the two,
  • the people who support their show and how they can best support them,
  • and how they plan to make the show sustainable over the long-term. 

You can find the Mad Mamluks on: 

Full show notes are available at Becoming the Alpha Muslim: http://becomingthealphamuslim.com/becoming-muslim-content-creator 

14 Oct 2016Engineering the Warrior Monk with Ed Latimore01:52:53

Have you ever played role-playing games (RPGs,) on table-top or video?

Games like Diablo, Baldur's Gate, Neverwinter Nights, and others allow you to create and customize characters that improve as you play through the story. 

The characters have different archetypes and abilities. There are warriors, mages, rogues, archers, etc.  

One of those archetypes is the 'warrior monk' or 'fighting monk,' loosely based on Shaolin monks.

His character backstory is one of asceticism, stoicism, constant improvement, deep study, internal and external harmony.

He fights unarmored with his bare hands and starts off weaker than other characters.

As the game progresses and he gains experience, his unarmed strikes can kill enemies in one strike, he becomes so agile that nothing can hit him and so resilient that he is immune to magical and elemental attacks.

How would you re-create the warrior monk in real life? 

It's a question I've been dwelling on ever since I became a father. 

What personality traits will you instill in them?

What knowledge should they learn?

What martial arts would they study? 

My guest today is uniquely qualified to speak on these issues.

Meet Ed Latimore - 13-1 professional boxer, undergraduate physics student, author, and blogger, from Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania.

He writes about martial arts, self-improvement, and effective learning at http://edlatimore.com

Ed has published three short works: 

The Four Confidences (a free ebook on how to be more confident, available on his website)

Twitter Poems and Insights (a collection of poems from Twitter on self-improvement with explanations and action steps)  

How to Catch and Kill a Crackhead (a humorous work of fiction based on Ed's experiences growing up in the 'hood.)

He is currently working on his 4th book.

Follow him on Twitter - @edlatimore

If you enjoyed this episode please leave me a rating/review on iTunes and Stitcher.

21 Nov 2017How to Waste Your 20s as a Man01:02:16

I wasted my 20s. Here’s how: a Born Muslim’s Convert Story.

It was all necessary. Those experiences made me who I am today.

But that doesn’t mean others have to make the same mistakes, or worse.

You don’t have to learn the hard way. Most of you will, because you don’t listen to people with more experience than you.

Some of you won’t. You’re the smart ones. This post is for you.

Like me, Alexander Juan Antonio Cortes wasted his 20s.

I asked him to join me on the Becoming the Alpha Muslim podcast to talk about the mistakes we both made.

We also tell you how young Muslim men (and non-Muslim men) in their late teens and early-to-mid 20s can do better.

If you don’t know who Alex is, he was one of my earliest podcast guests. We talked about the connection between physicality and spirituality.

You should listen to it after you finish listening to this one. Both are jam-packed with invaluable wisdom and practical life advice.

Do you have any questions about anything we discuss during the episode? Leave a comment on the blog and let us know.

Full show notes are available here: http://becomingthealphamuslim.com/how-waste-your-20s-man

02 Sep 2016Backpack Islamic with Dukkan Show00:45:35

This past Ramadan I was a guest on Dukkan Show, a lifestyle podcast based out of Dubai.

We ended up doing a series of four episodes together.

My first sit-down was with two the co-founders, Irshad and Feras. We talked about a prepping for Ramadan and a bunch of other things.

Some of the discussion didn't make it into the final cut.

It was quality material nonetheless, so I asked them to put it together for me.

That's what you'll be hearing in this episode.

We talk about my work as a copywriter, meeting interesting people on Twitter, why and how regular Muslims follow Islamic scholars, the nature of God's essence and attributes, and finally, the purpose behind Becoming the Alpha Muslim.

Enjoy, and please leave me a rating and review on iTunes and Stitcher. 

20 Jan 2018Trump: Year 1 - The Alt-Bro Perspective (feat. Surprise Guest)00:59:18

It's a little after one year since Donald J Trump was inaugurated as the 45th President of the United States of America.

In this episode, I'm joined by a surprise guest (hint: he's visiting from Chicago) as we talk about Trump's first year as president, the #metoo movement, Hollywood, and accountability. 

Show Notes

  • I reveal our surprise guest [01:19]
  • The luxuries of living in a Muslim country only a Muslim can truly appreciated [02:00]
  • The one unique trait of Dubai making it the #1 destination for Muslims in the West who want to migrate to a Muslim country [04:00]
  • Reclaiming the Alt-Bro…from pejorative to positive [05:30]
  • The fundamental error Muslim men make when defining masculinity that makes them deficient in their manhood [09:18]
  • Who decides the worth and quality of a man? [11:48]
  • The two core attributes of men that, when devalued, lead to a complete breakdown in society [14:00]
  • Trumpian communication in context…what the hell is he saying? [15:50]
  • So, how did Trump’s first year go? What did he achieve? Where did he fail? How are people reacting to it? [17:00]
  • When you frame Trump’s policy-making this way it all makes sense (and the two books where he tells you, “this is what I’m doing”) [24:25]
  • The true meaning of the #metoo movement almost no one will admit [28:10]
  • How many da’ees and shuyukh are #metoo victims? [31:30]
  • The double standard and faulty logic of women’s “empowerment” [32:40]
  • The one natural trait women should embrace to get the best out of the men in their lives [35:18]
  • A perfect, very recent example of double standards in action - Asmi Fathelbab and Linda Sarsour [36:25]
  • A disturbing trend in the behavior of some American da’ees and shuyukh, even though they have trained extensively in our Sacred Tradition [45:20]
  • Muru’ah - propriety; the type of permissible behavior that is allowed for different ranks of men, and what kind of behavior violates muru’ah [49:00]
  • The one solution to the current situation of the Ummah that most Muslims will dismiss [52:10]
  • Our guest gives out some final parting advice [55:20]

 

19 May 2023TERRIBLE Audio EPIC Content - BBC Interviews MuslimMan™ Founder Nabeel Azeez00:51:50

If you can bear with the awful audio quality of this recording, you are going to really enjoy this interview. Recently, I was interviewed by the BBC for their Heart and Soul podcast for a documentary about the rise of the Muslim manosphere.

When I recorded this interview, I had to do it off of a screen share. I didn’t get the Zoom recording. I asked them for the recording but they refused, it’s not something they do. So I had to ninja record it. Alhamdulillah that I did, because they used less than 5% of a 45-minute interview.

But the audio quality turned out to be really bad. So I had to manually go through and increase the levels when the host spoke. That took several hours. But it’s done now and the podcast is out on BBC too. You can listen to it here.

What I would suggest though, is that you listen to this interview first and then go listen to the Heart and Soul documentary. Because the full unedited interview will give you more context on what we talked about, the tone of the discussion and the overall vibe, as opposed to the chopped-up clips that you’re going to hear on the BBC Heart and Soul podcast, which were edited to fit the story that they were trying to tell.

So here’s the interview. Enjoy. Let me know what you think in the comments. And remember to subscribe to our newsletter.

30 Oct 2016Uncle Hotep and the Hotep Nation vs the Woke Agenda01:15:21

Uncle Hotep is a podcaster and Youtuber who offers insightful social and political commentary with the customary swagger of a Black American. He is one of the founders of the Hotep Nation, which offers positive solutions to the problems faced by black Americans in the USA. A naturally funny guy, Uncle Hotep's unique mix of comedy and insightful cultural critique makes for very entertaining listening. He's a featured guest on documentaries likes Silenced: Our War on Free Speech and on podcasts like InfoWars and Timcast IRL. You can find him on Twitter and YouTube.

“Muslim community, please stay away from the liberals. I’m just giving y’all a warning. It’s trickery, don’t fall for it.” – Uncle Hotep

Time-stamped Show Notes

  • 03:35 - What is Hotep? A continuation of the “conscious” community within Black America.
  • 04:50 - Hotep means “peace” but it was used as a derogatory term by BLM activists towards black people who pushed back against BLM’s victimhood narrative.
  • 06:20 - How does Hotep relate to the socially conscious movements of the past like Afrocentrism, the Nation of Islam, the Five Percenters?
  • 07:55 - Hotep is for self-accountability and self-reliance. I quote the Quran in response.
  • 09:10 - Uncle Hotep believes a lot of the problems in the black community, like black-on-black crime, can be alleviated by improving it from within. He quotes a Denzel Washington character from one of my favorite movies, Training Day.
  • 11:50 - I ask Uncle Hotep to explain what the deal is with BLM. We have a movement that, on the face of it, seems to be a popular protest against police brutality and extrajudicial killings, but a visit to their website throws up MANY red flags.
  • 17:50 - Why does Deray Mckesson (a BLM leader) live in a mansion?
  • 19:30 - What’s the connection between Feminism and BLM? Why do they vilify the straight, black male while claiming to advocate on his behalf?
  • 22:50 - Why aren’t Muslims thinking critically about BLM when many Black voices speak out against it?
  • 25:30 - You can check out the Hotep Nation website and see for yourself what Hotep stands for. Compare it to what BLM stands for.
  • 26:15 - I ask Uncle Hotep to explain the extremes of angry black Feminists on the one hand and twerking, slutwalk-types on the other. Where are the modest black women?
  • 29:15 - Uncle Hotep can’t understand why Muslims would ever associate with BLM, given the movement’s association with Feminism and LGBTQ. He talks about his time in the U.S. Air Force when he was stationed in Riyadh, K.S.A.
  • 31:00 - When did the Black community, who are generally socially conservative, switch to voting Democrat, and why?
  • 34:42 - The American Muslim community’s similar trajectory post-9/11.
  • 36:30 - Uncle Hotep talks about the effect that the mainstream media has on fanning the flames of civil discord.
  • 38:30 - The American Muslim community is acting in the interest of self-preservation rather than for the collective benefit of the global Muslim community.
  • 39:20 - Trump vs. Hillary. Where does Hotep stand?
  • 42:00 - Ed Latimore is down with Hotep.
  • 43:00 - The effect of illegal immigration on employment in the Black community.
  • 44:30 - Why are there no Hotep voices in black mainstream media? Why do they need people like me or Mike Cernovich to give them airtime?
  • 47:30 - Is this Hotep or BLM?
  • 48:00 - Who can lay claim to the legacy of Malcolm X and Muhammad Ali? If they were alive today, would they be down with Hotep or BLM?
  • 51:02 - Who are some of the non-Hotep Hoteps aka Hotep adjacent, i.e. Hotep in their thinking but don’t necessarily identify as Hotep?
  • 51:20 - Shoutout to Erykah Badu, Lauryn Hill, Dr. Umar Johnson, Dr. Boyce Watkins, ZaZa Ali, and Sonnie Johnson.
  • 53:55 - I ask Uncle Hotep to explain the motivation behind his podcast and Youtube channel.
  • 1:00:00 - What’s Uncle Hotep’s take on the election as it stands right now?
  • 1:02:50 - We have a laugh about Bill Clinton being the first black president.
  • 1:03:45 - What’s the deal with Shaun King? Why is he still around after being exposed as a fraud?
  • 1:06:05 - What role to black public figures like Jesse Lee Peterson and Sherrif James Clarke play in the discussions taking place in the black community?
  • 1:07:45 - Uncle Toms, House Negros, and House Muslims - do they exist? Who are they?
  • 1:11:40 - Uncle Hotep's plea to the American Muslim community
13 Jul 2017Shaykh Amir Saeed (The Mad Mamluks) Impersonates Nabeel Azeez00:00:27

For those of you who don't know, Shaykh Amir Saeed is a Seeker of Sacred Knowledge and the co-founder of the Mad Mamluks podcast. 

He also has a great sense of humor and is a talented impersonator.

Here's a short clip of Shaykh Amir doing his best impersonation of me. 

I thought it was hilarious, so I decided to publish it. 

Shaykh Amir graciously gave me permission to mention his name.

May Allah raise his rank. Ameen.

What do you think of his impersonation? Let me know in the comments.

Let me know in the comments.

By the way...

The Mad Mamluks are raising money to pay for Shaikh Amir's son Dihya's leukemia treatment.

I announced it to my email list and Facebook page during Ramadan.

After going back and forth with doctors for a few months ago 3-year-old Dihyah was diagnosed with leukemia. Since then he has been undergoing chemotherapy and multiple hospital visits. Help Commander Dhihya by raising funds for medical expenses.

After I sent out my announcements you all donated several thousand dollars, Alhamdulillah.

Jazakumullahu khairan.

Haven't donated yet?

Would you like to?

Clink on this link to donate to Dihya's medical fund.

20 May 2017The Doors of Repentance are Always Open...Until they Aren't00:15:32

This week's episode of the BTAM podcast is a narration this week's blog post by the same name. 

It's an adaptation of a khutbah I wrote a couple of years ago. 

Show notes are here - The Doors of Repentance are Always Open...Until They Aren't

Please remember to subscribe and leave me a rating and review on iTunes: 

Becoming the Alpha Muslim on iTunes

02 Feb 2017My #BruceLeeMoment00:14:48

In today's episode...

I fly solo for the first time and tell you how Bruce Lee's philosophy helped me manifest my Islam more honestly and authentically. 

When it comes to self-improvement in our time Bruce Lee is the most famous example and most likely the gold standard, even though he died over 40 years ago.

He is commonly known as a superlative martial artist and an action movie superstar.

Less well known is his expertise as a philosopher and being a prolific writer.

Most important to you and I is his constant striving to not only achieve balance but to excel in every aspect of his life.

This made him an excellent husband, father, friend, teacher, and student as well.

His holistic self-improvement is rooted in a worldview based on Eastern philosophies like Taoism.

Whatever his beliefs what is relevant here, what we can learn from, is his action.

We Muslims know his actions as a manifestation of Ihsan – personal excellence.

Lee died in 1973 just before the release of “Enter the Dragon,” the movie which catapulted him into global stardom.

Today, his legacy is carried on by his daughter, Shannon Lee.

Lee died when she was 4, so she didn’t grow up around him.

When asked, she has few memories of him.

She was more exposed to his personality, his philosophy, and his person through his prolific writings and library.

She is as much a student of Bruce Lee as she is his daughter.

So, I’m always riveted when I hear her speak about him.

Recently, I’ve been going through episodes of the Bruce Lee podcast. http://www.brucelee.com/podcast/ 

It is hosted by Shannon Lee and her Chief Marketing Officer, Sharon Lee (no relation.)

Each episode is marvelously pithy.

The podcast is what inspired this week’s post and podcast.

You can read this week's blog post here: 

http://becomingthealphamuslim.com/bruce-lee/

Please leave me a rating and review:

iTunes - https://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/becoming-the-alpha-muslim/id1150590015?mt=2

Stitcher - http://www.stitcher.com/podcast/nabeel-azeez/becoming-the-alpha-muslim

I'm also on Youtube now so please subscribe to the channel:

https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCXfnTcrShmtPQ4r2TcXNFgA 

13 Oct 2017How to Make a Side Income with Niche Sites00:37:37

My guest this episode is Kyle Trouble, owner of thisistrouble.com. Kyle is a professional blogger and podcaster who earns a full-time living selling consulting services, books, and online courses. 

I invited him on to speak about niche sites: how to do market research, how to launch a website, how to find products to sell, how to create content, etc.

If you are interested in earning a side income by building niche sites, Kyle has created a detailed video course called Pro Niche Site.

He takes you through the entire process from A-Z. AND the first six-videos of the course are free. 

>> Click here to check watch the 6 FREE videos <<

Show Notes:

  • [01:10] Kyle’s background and introduction to online business. His transition from a very comfortable full-time position as a computer engineer to becoming a professional blogger and podcaster.
  • [02:45] The different ways of making money online: freelancing, affiliate marketing, drop shipping, creating information products, etc.
  • [04:00] Is a niche site superior to the other online business models? The pros and cons of starting a niche site.
  • [06:30] You are relying almost entirely on search engine traffic. There is a possibility of an algorithm change making your website’s rankings drop.
  • [07:25] If you don’t like writing running a niche site will be difficult, although this can be outsourced.
  • [07:40] There may not be potential for long-term sustained income. Will the niche market still exist in a few years? You likely won’t make a full-time income from one niche site only.
  • [08:45] Niche sites are an excellent source of side income to supplement your salary, with the potential to transition to full-time online business.
  • [10:40] You will be the one creating the content for your first niche site, so it’s important to remember to pick a topic you are actually interested in. Once you have more experience and you know the model works. you can branch out into topics you don’t have an interest in.
  • [11:20] Build and launch the site with around 20 pieces of content, and optimize for Google’s search engine. You then try to sell someone else’s product on your site: this is affiliate marketing.
  • [11:30] Look for affiliate commissions of 10-20% for a physical product and 50-70% for digital products. The benefit of selling Affiliate products is that someone else has done the heavy lifting of marketing research, content creation, and even writing the sales copy.
  • [12:30] Kyle’s first few niche site projects failed. Here’s why.
  • [14:05] You don’t need a coding or technology background to get started. Your web hosting providers actually have one-click installation for Wordpress websites.
  • [15:45] Should you use a free Wordpress, Tumblr, or Medium website?
  • [16:50] Kyle walks you through the process of launching your website, step-by-step, including the costs of getting started.
  • [17:50] The three major niches - health, wealth, relationships - and their sub-niches are the best ones to get into because there is always demand.
  • [18:20] Once you’ve found your niche you need to find products to sell so you can have a good idea of the type of content you are going to create for your website.
  • [19:15] Where to go to find products to sell - highpayingaffiliateprograms. You should look for products that sell well and convert well.
  • [21:30] How to understand keywords so you can decide what content you want to create. You will also want to use tools to track your and your competitors’ search engine rankings like SEMRush, Ahrefs, SEO Quake, etc.
  • [23:55] You will only be able to track conversions (how many website visitors buy the products you’re selling) at a macro level. You can get some more data through Google Analytics if you know how to configure the right reports.
  • [27:00] For Wordpress websites you can use a plugin called Pretty Link and tag your affiliate links with a reference to the post where the reader clicked.
  • [28:20] Websites age like wine. The older your website is, the more traffic you will get over time. To scale your website further, you must create fresh content e.g. a new blog post every week or 1-2 posts a month.
  • [29:24] Start collecting your readers’ email addresses with a Email Service Provider like Mailchimp (free for your first 2000 subscribers) because as your website grows, you can use email marketing to sell affiliate products or even create and sell your own product.
  • [30:55] Once a website has achieved a certain amount of monthly recurring revenue, there are diminishing returns in growing it further. That is, the time and effort you put in to grow it could be better spent starting another niche site.
  • [32:00] Kyle’s insights on paying for ads on Google, Facebook, etc. to generate web traffic. Not recommended for beginners!
  • [34:00] The most profitable sub-niches will always come back to the big three: health, wealth, and relationships.
  • [35:38] Kyle has a paid course called Pro-Niche Site and a FREE 6-video mini-course to help you get started. (I have gone through the course myself and it will save you a LOT of time and error)
  • [36:00] Kyle also has a podcast, the Nomad and Nerdy Show, where he talks a lot about these topics (I was a guest recently) and also recommends reading/listening to Pat Flynn’s Smart Passive Income.

>> Click here to watch the 6 FREE videos. <<

18 Jan 2017A Music Lover's Struggle to Stay True to Islam with Irshad Azeez00:59:56

How do we engage Muslims who aren’t as far along the spiritual path as we are?

As someone who was Muslim in name alone for most of my life, it’s surprisingly easy to forget where I started and how far I’ve actually come.

Imagine how much harder it is for Muslims who know nothing but a proper adherence to Islam.

I want to understand how the "non-practicing" and “not-so-practicing” Muslim think, what their views are of the World, and what keeps them away from achieving their potential as a Muslims.

One of the more contentious issues that act as a barrier to Muslims becoming more religious is music.

I'm not interested in rehashing the fiqhi (legal) debate on music in Islam.

What I want to do, is try to understand how Muslims who are music lovers stay true to their faith.

So I invited my brother Irshad Azeez on for an informal chat.

Not because he’s non-practicing, but because he’s an effective go between, both in terms of his own level of religiosity (can improve a lot) and the circles he moves in (mostly non-practicing, and non-Muslim.)

Irshad is my younger brother by a year. He’s a rapper/emcee - stage name Jibberish, one quarter of the Dukkan Show podcast, and my business partner.

We met up a few days before he is due to leave Dubai and move back to Sri Lanka, to spend more time with our parents.

Time-stamped show notes

[01:32] I explain the premise of this episode and what I’m trying to accomplish

[03:20] Irshad doesn’t feel like he’s equipped to answer these questions

[03:43] Irshad tells us his background - how he ended up in Dubai, how he got involved with hip-hop, and his approach to spirituality in general.

[05:00] I ask Irshad to tell us more about how he got into podcasting, and what the audience response has been to Dukkan Show.

[08:10] How did Irshad get involved in the rap game?

[09:36] The need to express creativity through art.

[11:27] How does a fresh-off-the-boat Sri Lankan learn how to rap?

[14:55] If a Muslim who doesn’t listen to music wants to learn how to rap or do spoken word, how would he go about it?

[17:50] If you’re strict about not listening to music, just do spoken word.

[20:30] Spoken word or other forms of poetry are good skills to learn because they give you confidence.

[21:13] Irshad’s motivation to get into hip-hop was to overcome the racism and bigotry around him at the time.

[22:36] How was he received? What’s his reputation as an emcee in the region?

[26:30] How does Irshad reconcile his faith with the Islamic prohibition on music (according to the majority opinion?)

[28:50] If music is your test, how do you deal with it?

[31:09] Spiritual tests are like a complicated math problem - you’re scored on your work as well as the answer.

[31:35] How eloquence can be a test (using Hamza Yusuf as an example.)

[32:00] Writing letters to God as a journaling exercise.

[32:19] What is the hardest part of practicing Islam?

[35:21] Many religious Muslims isolate themselves and don’t have a complete picture of the World.

[37:00] The lifelong struggle to realize Rahma (mercy) despite the difficulty and harm around us.

[37:30] Isn’t Irshad afraid of losing himself by putting himself in situations where his faith is tested?

[37:55] Be aware of your spiritual state and have a vision of how you are going to get better.

[39:10] Be thankful for all of your life experiences because you appreciate the good through knowing the bad.

[40:58] What are some of the problems religiously observant Muslims have when approaching and communicating with those less-so (or non-Muslims.)

[43:00] Irshad mentions an awkward encounter with a religious Muslim during my wedding party.

[43:55] What’s the deal with Irshad (and Muslims like him) and Hamza Yusuf?

[46:00] It’s such a difficult thing to submit, the messenger needs to be someone who is easy-going and lenient.

[46:35] Most people just want the benefits of spirituality, or to feel spiritual, without the hard work of purifying their soul.

[48:10] What is the most effective way for more religiously observant Muslims to communicate with Muslims like Irshad?

[50:45] Beyonce, the Illuminati agenda, and it's connection to sorcery.

[53:02] The greatest trick the devil ever pulled was convincing the World he doesn’t exist.

[54:35] The hero is the guy people want to tear down.

[54:45] Why is Irshad moving back to Sri Lanka?

[56:28] What if humanity was to Judge you, instead of Allah?

[57:00] What is Irshad’s advice for Muslims, who are struggling, who want to regain their faith?

Where can you find Irshad online?

Please leave the Becoming the Alpha Muslim Podcast a rating and review

17 Feb 2017Nabeel, why support Mike @Cernovich? (Calling out the Activist Sect)00:14:00

This week's podcast is actually a week overdue.

I was supposed to release it with last week's post, "American Muslims in 2017: will the Schizophrenia Continue?"

If you want to read the entire article (you should,) here's the link:

http://becomingthealphamuslim.com/american-muslims-2017/

Today I answer questions about me and Becoming the Alpha Muslim for the benefit of my Muslim listeners who can't reconcile some of my online associations with the fact that I'm a religiously observant Muslim.

Here are some of the most common questions:

  • Nabeel, are you alt-right?
  • Why do you support alt-right figures like Mike Cernovich and Milo Yiannopolous who clearly hate Islam and Muslims?
  • Why are you so against Muslim activists / Social Justice activists?
  • Why are you so provocative and controversial online?

If you want to hear the answers, listen to the episode.

And please remember to subscribe on iTunes and leave me a rating and review:

Here's the link:

https://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/becoming-the-alpha-muslim/id1150590015?mt=2 

08 Nov 2016Cosmology, Epistemology, Methodology: Back to Basics with Dr. Shadee Elmasry01:36:31

My guest today is Dr. Shadee Elmasry

Dr. Shadee Elmasry was born and raised in New Jersey.

He began studying the traditional sciences rigorously at age eighteen after a summer in Fes, Morocco.

Since then he has studied all over the world including Hadramawt (Yemen), Mecca and Madina (Saudi Arabia), London (UK), Cairo (Egypt) and New Jersey (U.S.) under several luminaries.

He received a PhD in Islamic Studies from the University of London, School of Oriental and African Studies.

He is currently the Scholar in Residence and Director of Education and Community Affairs at the New Brunswick Islamic Center in New Jersey.

He is also the founder and head of Safina Society - an institution dedicated to the cause of traditional Islamic education in the West.

You can follow Dr. Shadee on Twitter and Facebook.

Time-stamped show notes:

03:20 Why has Islamic Aqidah (Creed) become a bad word among Muslims in the West? 

07:40 The three-part foundation to understanding Islam

  • Cosmology - what do we believe exists?
  • Epistemology - what are our sources of truth?
  • Methodology - how do we interpret these sources?

 

12:33 Cosmology is where believers split with atheists.

13:45 Epistemology is where mainstream Muslims (Sunni Muslims in general) split from the deviant sects in Islam and all other religions. 

16:55 Methodology is where mainstream Muslims will differ in their interpretations of Islam. Some interpretations fall within the scope of correct methodology while others do not.

23:43 What happens when someone who claims to be Muslim denies one of the axiomatic tenets of Islam? Those things that are necessarily known as part of the faith. (Arabic - ma'lum min ad-din bi 'dh-dharurah) 

24:45 Dr. Shadee goes off on Big Dawah. the Dawah establishment. (I've seen this term used formally once before; I think we should make it stick.)

27:30 Dawah is a failed enterprise if it's not grounded in knowledge.

28:35 I comment on how Dr. Shadee's strategy of sticking to the masjid and using the internet and social media to spread knowledge is the safest bet.

31:47 Dr. Shadee gives the example of Sheikh Murabit Al-Hajj, who lives in a Mauritanian desert camp while his students travel from all over the World to live and study with him.

32:56 I mention one of the fundamental maxims of Islamic law - avoidance of harm takes precedence over seeking benefit.

34:42 Dr. Shadee tries to stay as financially independent as possible because the guy who writes your check owns you.

37:05 Stand by your principles and people will respect you.

38:40 Dr. Shadee explains the result of politically correct preachers.

41:40 The fake unity of politically correct Islam, and the selfishness of Muslims who don't unequivocally make the Truth clear. 

45:10 How to know who to spend your time with: ask yourself "would I trade my Book of Deeds with that person on Judgement Day?"

47:10 In religion, the old way is the right way.

48:15 A personal development principle that's relevant to Dawah. Fall in love with the process, not the results.

49:40 The differences between Grassroots Dawah (in the masjid) and Big Dawah. 

50:20 Doing what's best for your audience - the Web Analytics and Bounce Rate Analogy.

51:30 Identifying the true metrics of success as opposed to vanity metrics.

53:40 Allah asks Ibrahim to call all the people of the World to Hajj and He will make sure the message is conveyed.

57:05 How should Muslims go about gaining the understanding of the fundamentals - cosmology, epistemology, methodology.

1:02:42 How should a beginner student approach studying Aqidah?

1:07:40 The importance of studying the history of the transmission of the Quran and Hadith - the need of the time.

1:13:07 Why are we being negative and sounding off these alarms?

1:16:30 The fasiq (sinful) Muslims of the past had a better Aqidah than some of the Muslim academics today.

1:18:00 The Muslim community can sometimes be more dangerous to a Muslim's faith than any non-Muslim.

1:19:45 My concern over my daughters reading and being brainwashed by deviant websites like Muslim Girl, Tempest, and Altmuslimah.

1:22:30 The importance of the student guarding his humility.

1:23:00 Why does Dr. Shadee refrain from speaking about politics? Is that on purpose?

1:24:12 If you want to do one great thing you have to say no to a hundred good things.

1:24:50 What sort of classes does Safina Society offer?

1:28:40 Segregation of the sexes is a feature of all traditional societies. The longest-surviving, most successful societies seperate genders and mix ages - modern Western society does the opposite.

1:30:24 How do people enroll in Safina Society classes? Do they have online classes?

1:32:50 To close out the show I ask Dr. Shadee to give Becoming the Alpha Muslim readers his #1 piece of advice.

If you enjoyed listening to this episode, please leave be a rating and review on iTunes or Stitcher.

17 Apr 2017Based Gradma Writes Sex Manual for Muslim Wives00:12:54

This episode is an accompaniment to my review of "the Pure Muslimah's Guide to Very Dirty Sex," an upcoming self-help book for Muslim women who want to improve their sex lives.

I narrate a chapter from the book, "how to do a strip tease," to give you an idea of what to expect. 

If you want to read my review and my interview of Umm Al-Mulaadhaat, the author, read my blog.

If you want to subscribe to Umm Al-Mulaadhaat's pre-sale email list, you can do so here - The Muslimah Sex Guide.

Please remember to subscribe to my podcast, and leave a rating and review on iTunes.

02 Dec 2017How to Develop Your Personality to Become a More Attractive Husband01:49:17

My guest this episode is dating and relationship coach, Pat Stedman.

This is his second appearance on the show.

I invited him on to talk to me about how married Muslim men can develop their personalities to become more attractive and sexually desirable to their wives.

This was a very organic discussion, where we both bounced ideas off each other and developed each other’s arguments.

Show Notes:

  • [00:05] This episode of the Becoming the Alpha Muslim podcast was brought to you by halal bedroom dot com. For a limited time, buy-one-get-one-free offer on your first order. Click here to buy now.
  • [02:50] Are millennials and generation Z creating culture or re-creating monoculture? Hipsters in the 5 boroughs in New York are exactly the same as hipsters in Dubai
  • [04:50] The cultural cognitive dissonance of the West
  • [06:30] The three pillars of attraction - pre-selection, persona, and personality - can be thought of as marketing, sales, and product
    • Pre-selection - social status and physical appearance
    • Persona - masculinity and social skills (Game)
    • Personality - what do you have to offer as a person
  • [09:10] Men who have great relationships are strong in at least two and good in one
  • [10:15] You can also think of the three pillars in evolutionary terms
    • environmental factors (pre-selection) - what types of males are attractive in a society
    • behavioral factors(persona) - how these males behave with the opposite sex
    • psychological factors (personality) - how they maintain the relationships long-term via relationship dynamics
  • [12:30] Pre-selection and persona will get a man up to closing the deal. Personality is what maintains the relationship.
  • [13:20] The example of Pick-up Artists. They are very capable of getting a girl’s attention in the beginning but have a hard time holding it afterwards.
  • [17:10] There are two dimensions of personality. Psychological growth and maturity, and chemistry (desire) and compatibility (comfort).
  • [22:35] The attractiveness of women vs their emotional maturity.
    • The younger girls (late teens to early 20s) who men are attracted to are basic bitches.
    • The older women (late 20s to early 30s) are the ones bringing more to the relationship than their box.
    • The sexual marketplace is so inefficient because there are two marketplaces operating in parallel - the physical and the psychological
  • [29:00] The similarities between Muslims and Ahlul Kitab - we’re all having premarital sex and “oral and anal don’t count”.
  • [32:00] Marriage is a massive vehicle for psychological growth.
  • Couples who get married young and stick together past the difficult years stay married for a very long time and have the best relationships.
  • They make each other grow together.
  • [36:30] The Western tradition vs the Eastern tradition: the individual is the smallest unit of society vs. the family is the smallest unit of society
  • [37:55] Marriage is 50% of your religion. Marriage accounts for so much of your spiritual growth and exercise of many of Islam’s religious duties.
  • [40:10] When you’re with someone, a mirror is held up to you. Our romantic desire for someone and being bound to them, forces us to work on ourselves and become better people.
  • [42:00] How Nabeel met and married his wife
  • [44:20] How long it takes to mature in a marriage and step into your role as the patriarch
  • [46:20] Men without children are man-children and women without children are self-absorbed narcissists
  • [47:20] You’re never truly ready to get married or have children. Allah provides sustenance for each person. My upward mobility strategy: get more wives and have more kids.
  • [49:50] Hypergamy and cognitive dissonance in women.
  • [51:40] Islam places a cost of doing business on both genders attempting to fully realize their respective sexual strategies (hypergamy and plate-spinning).
  • [54:30] Misconceptions about Islam and polygynous societies, “there are all these unmarried men without sexual access to women”.
  • [57:10] Pat impresses us with his knowledge of early Islamic history.
  • [58:10] There will always be the bottom end of the bell curve, Muslim or non-Muslim, male or female, who will likely always be single because they have no prospects
  • [59:30] Using Myers-Briggs Type Indicators to understand and explain personality. Pat gives us a short primary.
  • [1:02:00] I ask Pat to analyze my type - ESTJ-A (People Mastery - Assertive). Pay close attention to this. It’s a little complex to type out.
  • [1:07:00] How to become a more well-rounded and attractive husband: develop your inferior function. In my case, Introverted Feeling.
  • [1:08:50] How to develop your personality functions. The first step is to become aware of your type and your behavior in particular situations. Then you work to consciously exercise these inferior function behaviors.
  • [1:12:30] The difference between persona and personality. Persona is masculinity. So, developing a well-rounded and integrated personality does not affect your status as a masculine male.
  • [1:15:45] I ask Pat to interpret some of my rash and spontaneous behavior, despite being primarily logic and routine based. He says this is the development of my Extraverted Intuition.
  • [1:19:50] Pat’s type makes him someone who likes to debate and argue a lot. We discuss the difference between Pat’s kind of debating/arguing and my desire to debate/argue.
  • [1:24:30] I ask Pat to explain how understanding MBTI and knowing his and his wife’s types have helped him and his wife develop their relationship. Pat and his wife have very complementary types: she helps him get more organized and achieve more in life. He helps her feel emotions she never felt before.
  • [1:30:00] Pat and I think it’s a good idea for both husband and wife take an MBTI test, analyze it, and figure out ways to help each other grow together.
  • [1:33:00] The advantage of the MBTI test over the Big-5 test. It gives you a much better idea of how you can develop your personality and what will happen to you as you do.
  • [1:37:10] Pat is working on a book exploring and elaborating on his theory of the three pillars of attraction.
  • [1:39:30] Pat has a book on Text Game called, “Tackling Texting”, which even married men can use to create desire and sexual tension in their wives.
  • [1:43:20] Learning to read and use sub communication, which is Pat’s forte and features heavily in his book, can be adapted to any situation.
  • [1:46:30] This episode of the Becoming the Alpha Muslim podcast was brought to you by halal bedroom dot com. For a limited time, buy-one-get-one-free offer on your first order. Click here to buy now.

For complete show notes visit: http://becomingthealphamuslim.com/how-to-develop-your-personality

05 Jul 2017How do I keep my Ramadan spiritual state going after Eid?00:16:20

In this video I recommend 5 almost effortless things you can do to keep your Ramadan spiritual high going.

What you'll learn:

  • The relationship between hunger and spirituality.
  • Why does Allah select fasting to teach us taqwa?
  • The relationship between our nafs (psyche,) our ruh (soul,) and our spirituality.
  • What deeds are most beloved to Allah?
  • The characteristics of sticky habits.
  • What to do next after watching this video.

FREE EBOOK ON THE ETIQUETTE OF SEEKING KNOWLEDGE

Clink on the link below to download your copy.
http://becomingthealphamuslim.pages.co/seeker/

 

FULL SHOW NOTES

[Link coming soon]

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