Love Factually (Paul Eastwick and Eli Finkel)

Paul Eastwick and Eli Finkel are two professors who use psychological science to explain what your favorite romantic films get right -- and wrong -- about attraction and relationships.

In this special crossover episode of the Sex and Psychology podcast, Paul and Eli chat with Justin Lehmiller about how sex and relationships are depicted in movies. 

What is the absolute worst way to handle relationship conflict? Do we distort our own memories to make us feel better about our relationship? Are the reasons we’re attracted to someone similar to the reasons we’re attracted to someone else? Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind submerges Paul and Eli in an ecstatic fever dream about these fascinating questions.

For show notes, click here.

Hosted, produced, and edited by Paul Eastwick and Eli Finkel.

Music by Andrew Fraker and Sons

Artwork by Katie Keil

Are some people un-date-able? What does attachment avoidance look like? How should we think about grand romantic gestures? Paul and Eli dissect 10 Things I Hate about You, the 90s attempt to modernize Shakespeare’s eternally controversial “The Taming of the Shrew.” 

For show notes, click here.

Hosted, produced, and edited by Paul Eastwick and Eli Finkel.

Music by Andrew Fraker and Sons

Artwork by Katie Keil

How does passionate love feel? What does it mean to pay attention to each other? Are there distinctive characteristics in the emergence of same-sex attraction? Paul and Eli consider these questions, and more, in their analysis of Portrait of a Lady on Fire, the gorgeous period drama depicting forbidden love in late-eighteenth-century France.

For show notes, click here.

Hosted, produced, and edited by Paul Eastwick and Eli Finkel.

Music by Andrew Fraker and Sons

Artwork by Katie Keil

In this special crossover episode of the Dateable podcast, Paul and Eli chat with hosts Julie Krafchick and Yue Xu about how people should - and shouldn't - apply lessons from the movies to their dating lives.  

What does it mean to share your life with someone? How does sexual compatibility work? Can new relationships help us get over old ones? Paul and Eli consider these questions, and more, in their analysis of “Her,” Spike Jonze’s 2013 boy-meets-operating-system romance starring Joaquin Phoenix and Scarlett Johansson.

For show notes, click here.

Hosted, produced, and edited by Paul Eastwick and Eli Finkel.

Music by Andrew Fraker and Sons

Artwork by Katie Keil

What does jealousy do to a person? How are relationships interwoven with identity? What are the many forms of sex and sexual desire? Paul and Eli welcome in special guest Peter Sagal (host of NPR’s Wait Wait…Don’t Tell Me!) to chat about Eyes Wide Shut, Stanley Kubrick’s eternally fascinating swan song.

For show notes, click here.

Hosted, produced, and edited by Paul Eastwick and Eli Finkel.

Music by Andrew Fraker and Sons

Artwork by Katie Keil

In this special crossover episode of The Happiness Lab podcast, Paul and Eli chat with Laurie Santos about lessons learned from fact-checking rom-coms. 

Why is it so important to be able to celebrate with someone? Is parenting sexy? What are the challenges of being in a relationship when you don’t know who you are? Paul and Eli search for answers in the 1996 film Jerry Maguire, Cameron Crowe’s endlessly quotable rom-com, featuring acclaimed performances from Renée Zellweger, Tom Cruise, and Cuba Gooding Jr.

For show notes, click here.

Hosted, produced, and edited by Paul Eastwick and Eli Finkel.

Music by Andrew Fraker and Sons

Artwork by Katie Keil

Is striving to avoid mistakes a good romantic strategy? Can couples who are mismatched on hotness get together? Does relationship success require that you be a desirable person? Paul and Eli dust off Hitch, the 2005 rom-com vehicle for Will Smith and Eva Mendes, in search of answers.

For show notes, click here.

Hosted, produced, and edited by Paul Eastwick and Eli Finkel.

Music by Andrew Fraker and Sons

Artwork by Katie Keil

How does it feel to confront hard relationship choices? How can we truly listen to one another? What counts as infidelity? Paul and Eli unpack Before Sunset—the sequel to Before Sunrise—which features Jesse (Ethan Hawke) and Céline (Julie Delpy) unexpectedly reunited in Paris, confronting the past and changing the future.

For show notes, click here.

Hosted, produced, and edited by Paul Eastwick and Eli Finkel.

Music by Andrew Fraker and Sons

Artwork by Katie Keil

How does a transactional mindset undermine relationship well-being? What’s the nature of stereotypes? How can we tie our hands to achieve our goals? Paul and Eli invite Katy Milkman (Wharton professor and host of the Choiceology podcast) to discuss Pretty Woman, a Cinderella tale featuring Julia Roberts in a star-making performance.

For show notes, click here.

Hosted, produced, and edited by Paul Eastwick and Eli Finkel.

Music by Andrew Fraker and Sons

Artwork by Katie Keil

How does the trajectory of a relationship unfold over time? What does a good apology look like? Can men and women actually be friends? Paul and Eli unpack the themes of the genre-redefining masterpiece: When Harry Met Sally.

For show notes, click here.

Hosted, produced, and edited by Paul Eastwick and Eli Finkel

Music by Andrew Fraker and Sons

Artwork by Katie Keil

What are the joys and miseries of singlehood? Is “playing hard to get” an effective dating strategy? Why does it feel so good to be adored “just as we are”? Paul and Eli revisit “Bridget Jones’s Diary,” the 2001 rom-com starring Renee Zellweger, Hugh Grant, and Colin Firth—which Vanity Fair recently ranked as the fourth best romantic comedy of all time.

For show notes, click here.

Hosted, produced, and edited by Paul Eastwick and Eli Finkel.

Music by Andrew Fraker and Sons

Artwork by Katie Keil

What are the consequences of believing in the idea of a soulmate? How do relationships develop from the first day to the last? How well does the reality in our heads match the reality in the world? Paul and Eli consider these questions, and more, in their analysis of (500) Days of Summer, the 2009 romantic comedy starring Joseph Gordon-Levitt and Zooey Deschanel.

For show notes, click here.

Hosted, produced, and edited by Paul Eastwick and Eli Finkel.

Music by Andrew Fraker and Sons

Artwork by Katie Keil

Can interactions with strangers fulfill our need to belong? Does ironic detachment mask attachment insecurity? Should we try to change ourselves into somebody else’s ideal partner? Paul and Eli immerse themselves, again and again, in Groundhog Day, the timeless philosophical redemption tale starring Bill Murray and Andie MacDowell.

For show notes, click here.

Hosted, produced, and edited by Paul Eastwick and Eli Finkel.

Music by Andrew Fraker and Sons

Artwork by Katie Keil

Do people agree about who is attractive? What does it take to be a good matchmaker? Does similarity predict attraction? Paul and Eli discuss how well Clueless—the satirical 90’s remake of Jane Austen’s Emma—reflects the science of relationships.

For show notes, click here.

Hosted, produced, and edited by Paul Eastwick and Eli Finkel.

Music by Andrew Fraker and Sons

Artwork by Katie Keil

Paul Eastwick and Eli Finkel are two professors who use psychological science to explain what your favorite romantic films get right -- and wrong -- about attraction and relationships.

How does family disapproval affect the course of love? Can volatile relationships flourish? Does love cure dementia? Paul and Eli consider these questions, and more, in their analysis of “The Notebook,” the 2004 romantic melodrama starring Rachel McAdams and Ryan Gosling—and the winner of the MTV Movie Award for Best Kiss.

For show notes, click here.

Hosted, produced, and edited by Paul Eastwick and Eli Finkel.

Music by Andrew Fraker and Sons

Artwork by Katie Keil

How can people navigate the “friendzone”? Do men need romantic relationships more than women do? Does confusion about one’s identity undermine relationships? Paul and Eli search for answers in the 2023 film Barbie, Greta Gerwig’s feminist fantasia featuring Margot Robbie and Ryan Gosling.

For show notes, click here.

Hosted, produced, and edited by Paul Eastwick and Eli Finkel.

Music by Andrew Fraker and Sons

Artwork by Katie Keil

What are the benefits of optimism? How do people transfer attachments from parents to romantic partners? What exactly counts as stalking? Paul and Eli team up with Laurie Santos (Yale professor and host of The Happiness Lab podcast) to dive into the nice-guy manifesto Say Anything, starring (sigh) John Cusack and Ione Skye.

For show notes, click here.

Hosted, produced, and edited by Paul Eastwick and Eli Finkel.

Music by Andrew Fraker and Sons

Artwork by Katie Keil

How quickly do attachment bonds start to form? What are the relationship consequences of believing that men and women are fundamentally different? How does self-disclosure cultivate feelings of intimacy? Richard Linklater’s Before Sunrise takes Paul and Eli on a nostalgic joyride through these and other topics.

For show notes, click here.

Hosted, produced, and edited by Paul Eastwick and Eli Finkel.

Music by Andrew Fraker and Sons

Artwork by Katie Keil

Does the double standard linger for men and women? What exactly is sex positivity? Do people make unfounded assumptions about self-esteem and casual sex? Paul and Eli join forces with Justin Lehmiller (host of the Sex and Psychology Podcast) to discuss Easy A, the teen comedy adaptation of Hawthorne’s The Scarlet Letter.

For show notes, click here.

Hosted, produced, and edited by Paul Eastwick and Eli Finkel.

Music by Andrew Fraker and Sons

Artwork by Katie Keil

How much insight do people have about their romantic preferences? What does effective support look like? Does career devotion require tradeoffs in our relationships? Paul and Eli discuss the science behind the acclaimed musical throwback: La La Land.

For show notes, click here. 

Hosted, produced, and edited by Paul Eastwick and Eli Finkel.

Music by Andrew Fraker and Sons

Artwork by Katie Keil

How do people compete to win someone’s affections? What are the less obvious reasons that people have sex? How do relationships and power intersect? Luca Guadagnino’s Challengers provides ample opportunity for Paul and Eli to examine these and other sexy topics.

For show notes, click here.

Hosted, produced, and edited by Paul Eastwick and Eli Finkel.

Music by Andrew Fraker and Sons

Artwork by Katie Keil