Lift + Love (Allison Dayton and Jenie Hunter)

As parents of LGBTQ families, Jenie and Allison each have felt they were called by our Heavenly Father to create healthy faithful families incorporating their new reality. In this podcast, you will learn about the blessings and discoveries that many have been taught in their journey.   Peace will come as you turn fear into faith and as you pray for understanding and guidance from the Spirit.

If you would like some personal coaching on how to do this please sign up for a free consult with Jenie at Jenie Hunter Coaching www.jeniehuntercoaching.com.

We would also love for you to join us in our twice monthly Lift+Love Support Groups - to get the link sign up at Lift+Love Support .

For additional support and help please reach out to us on our IG accounts at Lift+Love and Jenie Hunter Coaching

Worry is a sneaky emotion.  It feels useful and necessary.  But that is a lie.  When we create worry about our LGBTQ child we are using up our valuable emotional energy in unproductive ways.  Taking action from worry is not where we want to parent from.

This episode Allison and Jenie talk about how to handle your worry, what result your worry is creating and how to thrive and not just survive. 

Link for the Pope's quoteshttps://www.catholicnewsagency.com/news/250221/at-general-audience-pope-francis-urges-parents-never-condemn-a-child

If you are looking to learn the tools and to get the coaching that will help your LGBTQ family thrive while gaining access to other families on this journey than the Lift and Love Community is the place for you.  For details on how to join go to www.liftandlove.org/community

Join us for any of our free monthly Lift+Love Support Groups - link sign up at Lift+Love Support .

For additional support and help please reach out to us on our IG accounts at Lift+Love and Jenie Hunter Coaching

 

 

Lisa Tensmeyer Hansen is the clinical director and founder of Flourish Therapy, Inc., (Flourish), a behavioral health clinic located in Provo, Utah, which she founded in February 2017 to meet the needs of LGBTQ+ and SSA individuals and their families. Lisa received a B.S. from Brigham Young University in 1990 as university valedictorian (Summa Cum Laude with Honors thesis), an M.S. in 2012 and Ph.D. in 2017, both at BYU, focusing on improving the mental health of LGBTQ+ people in conservative family and community. As part of her graduate programs at BYU, she taught a course on the family proclamation and a course in graduate research and writing.

https://flourishtherapy.org

Suicide resources : The Trevor Project

https://www.thetrevorproject.org

 

Join us in our twice monthly Lift+Love Support Groups - to get the link sign up at Lift+Love Support .

If you would like some personal coaching on how to do this please sign up for a free consult with Jenie at Jenie Hunter Coaching www.jeniehuntercoaching.com.

For additional support and help please reach out to us on our IG accounts at Lift+Love and Jenie Hunter Coaching

Allison and Jenie introduce Part 3 of the declaration of Divinity - Eternal Families.  They share how they viewed their eternal family once their son's came out.  They also share ideas on how to connect your child to their spirituality if they decide to leave to the church.  It is a powerful episode on examining how you view your family and how that effects your family.

Declaration of Divinity - Part 2 ETERNAL FAMILIES - "As mother's we know that our family can only be complete when all members are loved and valued equally. We believe that each individual is an important part of the Eternal Family of God. We have faith that our Heavenly Parents know and understand our unique situations and that by following their guidance, given through the Holy Spirit, our earthly family will return to live with them again."

Join us for any of our monthly Lift+Love Support Groups - link sign up at Lift+Love Support .

If you would like some personal help on how to do this please sign up for a free consult with Jenie at Jenie Hunter Coaching www.jeniehuntercoaching.com.

For additional support and help please reach out to us on our IG accounts at Lift+Love and Jenie Hunter Coaching

 

 

 

Allison and Jenie talk to Jessica Livier Mendoza De la Vega (Liv). Liv was recently asked to speak at BYU Women's Conference as an LGBTQ LDS member about the importance of creating a safer place in our church.  She shares with us her amazing journey as she has personally navigated finding her own place of belonging as an LGBTQ woman in the LDS member. You will be uplifted, entertained and taught by her honesty and vulnerability as she shares her amazing story.

To see Liv's session at  BYU 2021 Women's Conference Session BYU 2021 Women's Conference

Join us for any of our monthly Lift+Love Support Groups - ink sign up at Lift+Love Support .

If you would like some personal coaching on how to do this please sign up for a free consult with Jenie at Jenie Hunter Coaching www.jeniehuntercoaching.com.

For additional support and help please reach out to us on our IG accounts at Lift+Love and Jenie Hunter Coaching

 

Because of our petitioning the Lord we have been taught some beautiful truths about our LGBTQ children.  This is the second part of the series - "Declaration of their Divinity", a six part podcast series, talking about the truths that we and hundreds of mom's have learned and shared in this sacred calling.

In this episode Allison and Jenie talk with TJ who is a licensed clinical therapist practicing in Draper Utah (Instagram).  Tj is a gay LDS therapist who attended BYU and USC and hosts our Lift + Love monthly teenage/young support groups.  

Declaration of Divinity - 2 - Eternal Nature

Understanding and honoring our child's sexuality and gender is critical for their mental, physical, emotional and spiritual health. Their identity permeates all aspects of their spirit and is not limited to their sexuality or orientation.

President Nelson's - "Your Body: A Magnificent Gift to Cherish"

Join us for any of our monthly Lift+Love Support Groups - link sign up at Lift+Love Support .

If you would like some personal help on how to do this please sign up for a free consult with Jenie at Jenie Hunter Coaching www.jeniehuntercoaching.com.

For additional support and help please reach out to us on our IG accounts at Lift+Love and Jenie Hunter Coaching

 

 

In one week's time,  four mom's told us that their children didn't feel safe at church.  This is not unusual.  We hear this a lot.

We also hear from parent's who don't have LGBTQ children they don't understand why LGBTQ children feel unsafe at church.

In this episode we get vulnerable when we talk about HOW our LGBTQ saints feel emotionally unsafe in our churches.  

It isn't happening intentionally but it is a reality for most LGBTQ LDS members at church.  

Learning what makes them feel emotionally unsafe is the first step for us to become better disciples of our Savior.  

His gospel is not unsafe, so we need to talk to our LGBTQ children and rethink our teaching and how we present it to uncover the answer to what is causing our LGBTQ members to feel disconnected with Him?

We hope you can feel our love and plea for each of you and how we can create a safer environment for ALL of God's children in our church community.

If you are looking to learn the tools and to get the coaching that will help your LGBTQ family thrive while gaining access to other families on this journey than the Lift and Love Community is the place for you.  For details on how to join go to www.liftandlove.org/community

Join us for any of our free monthly Lift+Love Support Groups - link sign up at Lift+Love Support .

For additional support and help please reach out to us on our IG accounts at Lift+Love and Jenie Hunter Coaching

 

 

 

 

We get really real about how marriages can take a hit when your child comes out.  Jenie and Allison share how their marriages faired and what they had to do to keep them on track.

The strength of the marriage is as important as the health of your child.

We share six tips that can help protect and grow your marriage into your strongest relationship.

1. Stop thinking your spouse is doing it wrong.

    2. Focus on each other’s strengths vs. their weaknesses.

3. Great a safe place for each other. 

4. Be  mindful of creating time together

5. Invest in your marriage - therapist, coach, books.  Keep learning and educating to learn new skills and tools to help you.

    6. Tag Team - this is a marathon, not a sprint

Join us for any of our monthly Lift+Love Support Groups - ink sign up at Lift+Love Support .

If you would like some personal coaching on how to do this please sign up for a free consult with Jenie at Jenie Hunter Coaching www.jeniehuntercoaching.com.

For additional support and help please reach out to us on our IG accounts at Lift+Love and Jenie Hunter Coaching

 

Allison and Jenie talk with Dr. Julie Hanks and get her wisdom on some tough situations that families face raising LGBTQ children.

She shares some great strategies on questions like:

-How do you set boundaries and expectations with your LGTBQ child without them feeling you are not being supportive of them?

-How do you handle your child's ultimatum asking you to leave a church that doesn't support them?

-How do you handle parenting issues when you and your spouse disagree?

-How do you survive spiritually and still support your LGBTQ child?

This episode will teach you some amazing strategies on how to handle tricky situations but still stay connected to your child.

Dr. Julie Hanks, LCSW is the owner and Executive Director of Wasatch Family Therapy.  She works on helping you thrive in your personal life and in your family relationships.  You can find her on her podcast - Ask Dr. Julie Hanks or Instagram.

Wasatch Family Therapy

Dr. Julie Hanks Instagram

Podcast - Ask Dr. Julie Hanks

Join us for any of our monthly Lift+Love Support Groups - ink sign up at Lift+Love Support .

If you would like some personal coaching on how to do this please sign up for a free consult with Jenie at Jenie Hunter Coaching www.jeniehuntercoaching.com.

For additional support and help please reach out to us on our IG accounts at Lift+Love and Jenie Hunter Coaching

 

Allison speaks with Jenie Hunter and her son Nick, who is gay. They openly discuss their individual experiences as Nick realized he was gay and ultimately came out to family and friends

If you would like some personal coaching on how to do this please sign up for a free consult with Jenie at Jenie Hunter Coaching www.jeniehuntercoaching.com.

We would also love for you to join us in our twice monthly Lift+Love Support Groups - to get the link sign up at Lift+Love Support .

For additional support and help please reach out to us on our IG accounts at Lift+Love and Jenie Hunter Coaching

In this episode Jenie and Allison talk with Julie Spilsbury who serves as a Councilmember for the city of Mesa.  Julie shared with us her story on how supporting the controversial non-discrimination ordinance effected her relationships and her standing in the community.  

Julie was elected to the Mesa City Council in August of 2020, Councilmember Julie Spilsbury began her first term defending her vote on Mesa’s controversial Non-Discrimination Ordinance – passed March 1 2021.

Julie and her husband Jeremy ran a small tree care company for more than 20 years. They have lived in Mesa for almost their entire 24 years of marriage and have six children, five girls and one boy. She attended Brigham Young University.

To contact Councilmember Spilsbury you can reach her on Facebook  or her melissa.hollenbeck@mesaaz.gov.

If you are looking to learn the tools and to get the coaching that will help your LGBTQ family thrive while gaining access to other families on this journey than the Lift and Love Community is the place for you.  For details on how to join go to www.liftandlove.org/community

Join us for any of our free monthly Lift+Love Support Groups - link sign up at Lift+Love Support .

For additional support and help please reach out to us on our IG accounts at Lift+Love and Jenie Hunter Coaching

 

 

 

 

 

In Episode 22 we talked about how we stay in the church as an LDS LGBTQ family.

When your child comes out, it can feel like you are a new path to the Savior and it can sometimes feel like a lonely path.  In order, to thrive on this new path you need a survival pack.  

In this episode we are going to teach you 3 tools that will help you not just survive that new trail but thrive on it.

Thoughts that we referenced in this episode are:

T: What if it’s ok that others don’t understand yet?

T: What might be different if you believed your path was perfect for your family and you supported yourself accordingly?

T: The Church has given us guidance, but as individuals we ultimately go to God for our personal revelation.

T: I can disagree with some of the Church’s guidance and still be a faithful member.

Join us for any of our monthly Lift+Love Support Groups - link sign up at Lift+Love Support .

If you would like some personal help on how to do this please sign up for a free consult with Jenie at Jenie Hunter Coaching www.jeniehuntercoaching.com.

For additional support and help please reach out to us on our IG accounts at Lift+Love and Jenie Hunter Coaching

 

 

 

 

Kate studied organizational behavior at Brigham Young University and psychology at Columbia University.  Currently Kate works at Nu Skin Enterprises, leading their Equity, Diversity, and Inclusion initiatives.

Kate talks about the conclusions learned from the researching the LDS LGBTQ community. Kate's graduate research studied 450 individuals at the intersection of non-heterosexuality and religion. She shares her findings, conclusions and pastoral implications for our LDS LGBTQ members.

Kate gets vulnerable as she shares her personal story on how her life was changed by this research and her personal involvement with LDS LGBTQ members.  She has wisdom and insights into the difficult road our LGBTQ friends walk.

Listen, Learn & Love Podcast: Episode 132 with Kate Toronto

You can find Kate at on Instagram

Join us for any of our monthly Lift+Love Support Groups - link sign up at Lift+Love Support .

If you would like some personal help on how to do this please sign up for a free consult with Jenie at Jenie Hunter Coaching www.jeniehuntercoaching.com.

For additional support and help please reach out to us on our IG accounts at Lift+Love and Jenie Hunter Coaching

 

 

Are you dreading Thanksgiving dinner with the big family?  If so, we got your back.  In this episode we will teach you how to handle crazy grandma and have the best big family dinner you have ever had.  We arm you with great thoughts and 4 tips on how to prepare and coach yourself before the big family gathering.

The book Allison referenced "Proclaim Peace

If you are looking to learn the tools and to get the coaching that will help your LGBTQ family thrive while gaining access to other families on this journey than the Lift and Love Community is the place for you.  For details on how to join go to www.liftandlove.org/community

Join us for any of our free monthly Lift+Love Support Groups - link sign up at Lift+Love Support .

For additional support and help please reach out to us on our IG accounts at Lift+Love and Jenie Hunter Coaching

 

When we talk to mom's of children who just came out - this is the number one question.  Is this just a phase?  Is this a trend?  All of their friends seem to be doing this.

In this episode we talk with Dr. Lacey Bagley, LMFT who owns Celebrate LGBTQIA+ Therapy Services in Provo, Utah.  She helps us break "Is this just a phase?" down and gives us some great tips on how to parent and help your LGTBQ child as they explore their identity.

To contact Dr. Lacey you can reach:

Website: Celebrate Therapy/Dr. Lacey

Celebratetherapy Instagram or Dr. Lacey Bagley Instagram

If you are looking to learn the tools and to get the coaching that will help your LGBTQ family thrive while gaining access to other families on this journey than the Lift and Love Community is the place for you.  For details on how to join go to www.liftandlove.org/community

Join us for any of our free monthly Lift+Love Support Groups - link sign up at Lift+Love Support .

For additional support and help please reach out to us on our IG accounts at Lift+Love and Jenie Hunter Coaching

 

 

Allison and Jenie talk with Becky Edwards who is a faith-based life coach, speaker and writer. She shares with us 2 tools that will help you grow your faith. She is also a LGBTQ mom and has learned to use these tools to manage the journey of supporting her son and honoring her faith.  She is a former LDS seminary and institute teacher, coach for 3 Key Elements' Elite Mentor program, professional organizer and homeschooler. She is a mother of five, grandmother of five, blogger, truth seeker and sharer.  Becky shares her faith journey as an LGBTQ mom and some amazing tools that has helped her and hundred's of others gain a greater relationship with their heavenly parents. One of these tools is heavenly journaling - if you would like to join her FB challenge for this tool join here  Becky Edward's 30 Day Journal Challenge

If you would like to find out more information about Becky find her at Purpose Driven Motherhood.

Join us for any of our monthly Lift+Love Support Groups - link sign up at Lift+Love Support .

If you would like some personal help on how to do this please sign up for a free consult with Jenie at Jenie Hunter Coaching www.jeniehuntercoaching.com.

For additional support and help please reach out to us on our IG accounts at Lift+Love and Jenie Hunter Coaching

 

 

This episode we are sharing the conversation I recorded with Heather Rackman from Latter Day Life Coach  Podcast

We talk about how to you as the mom can be the touchpoint for your LGBTQ child.

If you are looking to learn the tools and to get the coaching that will help your LGBTQ family thrive while gaining access to other families on this journey than the Lift and Love Community is the place for you.  For details on how to join go to www.liftandlove.org/community

Join us for any of our free monthly Lift+Love Support Groups - link sign up at Lift+Love Support .

For additional support and help please reach out to us on our IG accounts at Lift+Love and Jenie Hunter Coaching

 

 

Parenting can often feel lonely and defeating and it feels similar as being lost in the wilderness.  In this episode Jenie ad Allison breakdown the story in Nephi 16 and gain some great wisdom on how to handle your personal "bow-breaking" moments as an LGBTQ family.  You will learn how much your Heavenly Father loves you and your family and the steps to gain your own personal Liahona to guide your family.

Join us for any of our monthly Lift+Love Support Groups - link sign up at Lift+Love Support .

If you would like some personal help on how to do this please sign up for a free consult with Jenie at Jenie Hunter Coaching www.jeniehuntercoaching.com.

For additional support and help please reach out to us on our IG accounts at Lift+Love and Jenie Hunter Coaching

 

 

 

I thought I was alone! This is the number one thing we hear from mothers of LGBTQ kids.  

When your child comes out as LGBTQ it can feel very lonely as the mom.  You are not sure who you can talk to and who, if anyone, would understand what you are going through.  This is tricky because this is a time when you need the MOST support. 

Allison and Jenie talk about how finding each other and how creating a safe place has changed their life.  And using their experience, they are creating a community with other LGBTQ LDS mom's.  The mom support system is the best way to learn the tools needed to support their child in healthy ways. 

Join us in our twice monthly Lift+Love Support Groups - to get the link sign up at Lift+Love Support .

If you would like some personal coaching on how to do this please sign up for a free consult with Jenie at Jenie Hunter Coaching www.jeniehuntercoaching.com.

For additional support and help please reach out to us on our IG accounts at Lift+Love and Jenie Hunter Coaching

All mother's love and worry about their children.  But mother's of LGBTQ children spend a lot of time pleading with our Heavenly Parents and our Savior asking them to teach us about our LGBTQ children.  Who are they?  What is their purpose?

Because of our petitioning the Lord we have been taught some beautiful truths about our LGBTQ children.  This is the first part of the series - "Declaration of their Divinity", a six part podcast series, talking about the truths that we and hundreds of mom's have learned and shared in this sacred calling.

Declaration of their Divinity

As mothers of LGBTQ children we testify to their divinity. It is our sacred responsibility to seek for and receive new understanding from our Heavenly Parents concerning the full measure of their creation.

Join us for any of our monthly Lift+Love Support Groups - link sign up at Lift+Love Support .

If you would like some personal help on how to do this please sign up for a free consult with Jenie at Jenie Hunter Coaching www.jeniehuntercoaching.com.

For additional support and help please reach out to us on our IG accounts at Lift+Love and Jenie Hunter Coaching

 

For families of LGBTQ children church can be a painful place.  Sometimes it is hard to find the right balance of supporting your child and finding safety in your church community. Allison and Jenie talk about three tools that helps them deal with the dissonance and how they make church a healthy place where their faith can continue to thrive.

Join us for any of our monthly Lift+Love Support Groups - link sign up at Lift+Love Support .

If you would like some personal help on how to do this please sign up for a free consult with Jenie at Jenie Hunter Coaching www.jeniehuntercoaching.com.

For additional support and help please reach out to us on our IG accounts at Lift+Love and Jenie Hunter Coaching

 

 

Declaration of Divinity - Part 5

We get the question a lot - "Why do we have so many LGBTQ saints?"  This question we discuss in this episode and how we feel as mother's of LGBTQ children that our LGBTQ children have an important purpose here on earth.  That they were sent down to earth at this time to teach others and to do specific missions for their Heavenly Father.  Jenie and Allison discuss the beauty of what their diversity brings and how diversity makes the body of Christ perfect only with its diversity.

To quote Bishop Gérald Caussé, Presiding Bishop,  “unity is not achieved by ignoring and isolating members who seem to be different.”4 Christ’s unity is not subtractive, whereby we disregard the significance of our differences. It is additive. This episode talks about how we can better strive to understand, to appreciate, and to integrate our differences in order to carry out the Lord’s work. This is an important episode about how essential diversity is for Christ's church.

https://www.churchofjesuschrist.org/study/ensign/2019/07/the-blessings-of-diversity?lang=eng

 

Declaration of Divinity - Part  5 PURPOSE - We believe that our LGBTQ children have been sent to earth at this time for a divine mission. Their diversity is essential to the body of Christ and we are not whole without them. They are here to teach us and it is our responsibility to ask God what He wants us to know and how we can better love His children.

Join us for any of our monthly Lift+Love Support Groups - link sign up at Lift+Love Support .

If you would like some personal help on how to do this please sign up for a free consult with Jenie at Jenie Hunter Coaching www.jeniehuntercoaching.com.

For additional support and help please reach out to us on our IG accounts at Lift+Love and Jenie Hunter Coaching

 

Every parent wants to raise a healthy child, no matter what their sexuality is.

When your child comes out this is one of the biggest fears that parents of LGBTQ children have.

Will they be healthy emotionally and spiritually?

In this episode Allison and Jenie talk about how they handled it with their sons and what they have learned helping 100's of families help their child

If you are looking to learn the tools and to get the coaching that will help your LGBTQ family thrive while gaining access to other families on this journey you can work 1:1 with Jenie at www.jeniehuntercoaching.com

Join us for any of our free monthly Lift+Love Support Groups - link sign up at Lift+Love Support .

For additional support and help please reach out to us on our IG accounts at Lift+Love and Jenie Hunter Coaching

 

 

This is our continued conversation with David Doyle's about the list that he has created to help Bishops/Leadership navigate how to support their LGBTQ membership.  He has curated this list through his experience as an LDS LGBTQ member and someone who has had many interactions with Bishops, youth and stake leaders as he has served as a Stake Young Men's President and Stake Executive Secretary for many years. 

This will be a great resource to share with any LDS leader.

 

10 Suggestions for Bishops interacting with LGBTQ members

 

1) All LGBTQ members need a trusted adult in their life who loves, supports and sustains them, no matter which path they choose.  

 

2) When someone “comes out” they should be greeted with love, validation and hope, not a lecture on repentance or reminder of the Church’s stance on same-sex marriage  

 

3) Create a safe culture for the LGBTQ person. Express your love for a variety of members, including LGBTQ members.

 

One idea is to share what would happen if someone came to your office and shared they are queer. “I would thank you for trusting me enough to share, and recognize the courage it took to come here. I’d ask you, if you’re comfortable doing so, to share with me some about your journey up to this point. Then I’d ask if it’s alright if I give you a blessing. Then, regardless of if you wanted a blessing or not, I’m a hugger, so I’ll ask if it’s okay to give you a hug.”

 

4) Don’t use words like “struggling” or say they’ll be “fixed” in the resurrection   

 

5) Our Heavenly Parents love their LGBTQ children, we should give them unconditional love and support and recognize they will bless the lives of others

 

Even when telling them hard things, marginalized people always felt Jesus' love. Their encounters with Jesus left them with more dignity than when they started. As you interact with queermembers, this would be a worthy goal, to help them feel loved, uplifted and strengthened.  

 

6) LGBTQ individuals are more likely to be the victims of bullying and violence than any other minority group in the USA. Be on the lookout for youth or young adults who may be doing & saying unkind things.  

 

7) Know the signs of suicide and depression. LGBT people are at much higher risk. It’d be a good idea for youth leaders to have some training in this.

8) Encourage them to pray and ask if God loves them as they are 

9) Especially before or after lessons about marriage, say something like “I know there are people in this ward who cannot be married because of same-sex attraction or other reasons. I love you, and the Lord has a plan for you.”

10) Know that studies show that being active in the LDS church is often detrimental to the mental health and quality of life for LGBT people. For a person’s well-being, they may decide they need a break. Make sure they know they’re welcome to come back.

David Doyle's Blog  (https://nerdygaymormon.tumblr.com/post/159164583009/so-do-you-remember-the-guy-in-yesterdays-general)   Example of a video that David Doyle made of the stake presidency (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GRMDXsobNls)   Example of video David Doyle created for Stake Youth Conference: (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uVhb0HQLGQA).  

Join us for any of our monthly Lift+Love Support Groups - ink sign up at Lift+Love Support .

If you would like some personal coaching on how to do this please sign up for a free consult with Jenie at Jenie Hunter Coaching www.jeniehuntercoaching.com.

For additional support and help please reach out to us on our IG accounts at Lift+Love and Jenie Hunter Coaching

 

This conversation Allison and Jenie talk with Ben and Charlie about their journey as podcast hosts of Questions from the Closet. Charlie and Ben's podcast discuss questions they are commonly asked as gay members of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints. Each week they are joined by a guest to talk about a question as it relates to LGBTQ+ topics within the context of faith.

In this episode they share with Allison and Jenie their story about their friendship and how their podcast got started.  Some of their favorite moments and episodes, what they have learned, and how people have reacted to their podcast.

Ben Schilaty is an administrator and adjunct professor at Brigham Young University. He has also written the book A Walk In My Shoes

Charlie BirdI was Cosmo the Cougar at BYU. You may have seen his viral dance videos. He is currently back at BYU pursuing a Masters degree in Social Work. Charlie has also written  Without the Mask 

Jenie and Allison host free support groups for our LGBTQ LDS families.  Please Join us for any of our monthly Lift+Love Support Groups - link sign up at Lift+Love Support .

If you would like some personal coaching on how to do this please sign up for a free consult with Jenie at Jenie Hunter Coaching www.jeniehuntercoaching.com.

For additional support and help please reach out to us on our IG accounts at Lift+Love and Jenie Hunter Coaching

 

Why does the pride flag mean to you?   Jenie and Allison discuss the pride flag and how we can see this symbol in a new light.

If you would like some personal coaching on how to do this please sign up for a free consult with Jenie at Jenie Hunter Coaching www.jeniehuntercoaching.com.

We would also love for you to join us in our twice monthly Lift+Love Support Groups - to get the link sign up at Lift+Love Support .

For additional support and help please reach out to us on our IG accounts at Lift+Love and Jenie Hunter Coaching

 

This episode we talk with Michelle and Carey, two mom's who felt prompted to create a safe place for our LGBTQ allies and members.  The tell us how they started the group and what has happened since, the lessons they have learned and how participating in this group has changed them.  If you have ever wondered what you could do to create safer places of study and belonging for others you will love hearing Michelle and Carey's story.

Links for Leader and Study group letters. 

Join us for any of our monthly Lift+Love Support Groups - link sign up at Lift+Love Support .

If you would like some personal help on how to do this please sign up for a free consult with Jenie at Jenie Hunter Coaching www.jeniehuntercoaching.com.

For additional support and help please reach out to us on our IG accounts at Lift+Love and Jenie Hunter Coaching

Can I support my LGBTQ child and still hold a temple recommend?

We get this question a lot.  We tackle this pain point head on and arm you with apostle quotes, handbook references and stake president's views on how you can do both.

This episode will help educate you on why we have temple recommend interviews.  It will also help you understand your role and the role of the  Bishop/Stake President.

Attending the temple is a right that Heavenly Father wants for all of his children.  We feel like our temple attendance helped us parent from our higher self.  We want you to have the same confidence and surety in going to the temple and your temple recommend interview.  

Join us in our 5 monthly Lift+Love Support Groups - to get the link sign up at Lift+Love Support .

If you would like some personal coaching on how to do this please sign up for a free consult with Jenie at Jenie Hunter Coaching www.jeniehuntercoaching.com.

For additional support and help please reach out to us on our IG accounts at Lift+Love and Jenie Hunter Coaching

Jenie and Allison talk with two of the coolest LGBTQ moms, Lisa Clark Valentine and Hailey Smith.  Both of these ladies are extremely talented and has made our world a better place with their talents. Lisa Clark is an actress and producer, known for Show Offs (2019), Pretty Darn Funny(2012) and Once I Was a Beehive (2015). Hailey Smith is an actress and producer, known for Show Offs (2019), Once I Was a Beehive (2015) and Christmas Time

On this episode we talk about what an LDS LGBTQ TV show would look like. We invent the characters and the story line.  It is full of laughs and tender moments and most of all exceptional wisdom from 4 moms's who love their LGBTQ children at a 10.

Join us for any of our monthly Lift+Love Support Groups - link sign up at Lift+Love Support .

If you would like some personal help on how to do this please sign up for a free consult with Jenie at Jenie Hunter Coaching www.jeniehuntercoaching.com.

For additional support and help please reach out to us on our IG accounts at Lift+Love and Jenie Hunter Coaching

 

 

 

Declaration of Divinity - Part 4

We know that our Heavenly Father love our LGBTQ children.  Unfortunately this is not always the message they receive in our church communities. Jenie and Allison discuss how harmful it is that our LGBTQ children receive the message of shame about who they are.  Allison share's her brothers journey with this messaging and how that affected his live.  Jenie talks about how sometimes parents are part of this harmful message and what to do next if that has happened in your family. This is a powerful episode about how important our words are to our LGBTQ children.

Declaration of Divinity - Part 4 Divine Birthright - We take away an LGBTQ child’s divinity and replace it with shame when we tell them the way they were born is not part of God’s plan. As mothers we assert that any message taught to our children should reassure them that they are a beloved Child of God and so entitled to all the blessings promised to His faithful children.

Join us for any of our monthly Lift+Love Support Groups - link sign up at Lift+Love Support .

If you would like some personal help on how to do this please sign up for a free consult with Jenie at Jenie Hunter Coaching www.jeniehuntercoaching.com.

For additional support and help please reach out to us on our IG accounts at Lift+Love and Jenie Hunter Coaching

 

 

Transcripts:

Jenie Rae Hunter  0:03   Hello are lifted left community we are back with you today Alison and I and we are so excited we always love recording these podcasts they we want you know they are from our heart. Anything we're talking to you about has been weighing heavy on our heart and we work on it for weeks and weeks and this one in particular that we're going to talk about today and we're gonna get into in just a minute but I think this has taken us six months out so

Allison Dayton  0:28   it feels like it and Jenny got me up at the crack of dawn, before the animals. We ran out of time yesterday

Jenie Rae Hunter  0:37   Right so Allison might have a little morning voice because it's very early. Yes, almost morning. We had exciting house here in the hunters like my daughter, Sarah Jane, open up her she's at BYU. So we did it all via Facebook Live but she openened her mission call amd is going to Rome Italy and now her twin is going share her twin already opened her college she's going to Las Vegas, Nevada. So my twins will be out in January and March to go on their mission. So super excited for them. And your you have your BYUI. So, it was busy this week, for sure. And then we have some really exciting things coming up your loved one we're not going to tell you about we're just going to we have a really big announcement that we is squeezing changes happening. Present. It is it is we are so excited about we there's so much going on behind the scenes without that we're not going to we're gonna just tease you but in December we have a big announcement and our live event. Our first Love

Allison Dayton  1:37   Live event. It's the first time I think ever that we that mothers of LGBTQ children have gotten an opportunity to be together for two days.

Jenie Rae Hunter  1:50   I can not wait.

Allison Dayton  1:54    It's going to be February 28 and march 1.

Jenie Rae Hunter  1:59   Pretty full days both of those Yep, in what city in Provo?

Allison Dayton  2:04   Lindon, it's next to Provo, in the shadow of the great Timpanogos  in this darling Event Center.

Jenie Rae Hunter  2:15   And we are taking limited moms like we are making it this very cozy. So by the time you hear this podcast, it is live,

Allison Dayton  2:24   Go to liftandlove.org and look at the live event button on the homepage and have a look at it. But it shows you what's paid for in the event proce and what you'll receive. I think the most important thing is you're going to be with a lot of other women who have been going through the same changes that you have, and you are going to find friendship and love and camaraderie and lifelong support. And we just we can't wait we we can't wait to do it.

Jenie Rae Hunter  3:05   Yeah. If you know us, we are both kind of party girls. And so we have like it's going to be fun. And our whole purpose for this event coming together as women as moms is to leave with that so much better friendships and community in this because we know how isolating could be as LGBTQ moms, and we are creating things to end that isolation. So we're so excited. So we're going to focus on what we're here today. And we're talking about number four of the declaration of divinity. And this one's exciting. Go ahead,

Allison Dayton  3:42   We are going to focus on birthright here. I'm just gonna read it really quick, I'm going to lead with it because these are the words that that began kind of our quest for sort of these statements. We take away our child's divinity and replace it with shame when we tell them the way they were born is not part of God's plan. as mothers, we assert that any message taught to our children should reassure them, that they are beloved children of God, and so entitled to all the blessings promised to his faithful children.

Jenie Rae Hunter  4:18   I just, I mean, we know this. When you heard this, I'm sure you felt like we did like, wow, like it hurts that this is truth that we have given our LGBTQ filter and say, shame instead of divinity. We mean we talked to hundreds of moms. And this is the common denominator of what we have to kind of heal in our children of the shame and the trauma that they've received from the messages and potentially it's not I know that it's never been intentional anybody to take away anybody's divinity, but just kind of the platitudes and the things we've said part of our community. This has produced shame, if you're LGBTQ member,

Allison Dayton  4:57   Right? And we've we journey and I've just been talking about These words. And it's interesting because I was looking through a journal from last year, and I try and keep I keep, I'm not great at writing journals, but I keep like statements and like inspiration and personal revelation in my journal and part of that first line, they're taking away the Divinity was in there. And Jenny and I have talked about this over the years, with my brother's death and the experiences, the sacred experiences around being in this house, and being part of that. One of the real understandings I had with it, he felt divorced from his heavenly parents when he left the church, because he was gay. And it was something he left when he was 24. And he died at 58. And it was something that he could never heal. And it was actually one of the first real understandings that I had, and I'm sort of ashamed I didn't understand it before. 

Unknown Speaker  6:14   he felt Holy Spirit after Yeah.

Allison Dayton  6:17   And he was so angry at the church, and that it was hard to look at it in like a healthy, objective way. And anyway, I just this has been in my head for a long time. And I think as Jenny and I have have raised these children, we can see it. This disconnection from their divinity and this disconnection from, from Jesus Christ and from God that we don't nobody intends it to happen. But, because because of some of the words around how we talk about LGBTQ people, it does happen.

Jenie Rae Hunter  7:04   It does. And we know how, when you really look at who you are, and how you recreate it with the feeling of shame, like, I mean, how many times have we heard like, well, if I kill myself, then I won't feel this way anymore. And we know of the suicides and we know I mean, this is a serious problem. And, you know, I know, part of my son, I mean, he had some drug use, and it was from this feeling of shame. And it's really hard as parents, because then you have, like, have I add it to that shame. And, you know, like, you have to, it's really kind of devastating to go through it. Because you hold all of us, none of us should feel shameful for who we are, we're 100% worth, and that, you know, it's easier for us. But once when our children are affected, and our siblings, and that's a heartache. That's really it takes a while for you personally to heal for him too. And, you know, I think it's so interesting because Preston, you know, he didn't start that way. Like he served a mission, right? 

Allison Dayton  8:06   oh and, and, you know, even and maybe one day we'll, I'll be brave enough to do, we'll do a podcast on suicide, but we were cleaning out his house, there were such symbols, or symbols from our gospel, even a painting he had done at the temple. In his home. They were not out like ours would be. Yeah. But you know, there was actually a photograph of the sacred grove in his home. And those symbols were so important to him, even even in his anger. And I think we, as mothers have just seen this and you know, I had a mom asked me this week, are actually a friend. Another LGBTQ mom said that she had a young man say to her, how do I do this? If God hates me? And the church hates me. And I mean that I know that was never anyone's intent. It's interesting how impactful Elder, Ballard's talk at BYU was when he said to those of you who are LGBTQ, I want you to know that there is a place for you in God's kingdom. Like that is if you're on the Instagram accounts for LGBTQ people that is so often repeated and I know that you'll be saying, well, we maybe we don't take away anyone's divinity. But I think that they we we might not do that, but that is the feeling. Right that our members and our families feel.

Jenie Rae Hunter  10:01   Right? And, and we know this to be true because of how many we talked to right. And you know, even when a child is super obedient and you know, goes on a mission because they think this the mission will then solve this what they feel like is shameful about them. And then they come back and, you know, we just stories over and over again about and they, you know they can't even listen to the apostle speak anymore because that triggers that feeling of unworthiness. And so

Allison Dayton  10:33   I think I think we're we're getting away from it. But that idea that our families are won't be whole in eternity. So we have this member of the family that won't have an opportunity to be whole, and with us, in celestial glory puts the whole family in question. Right?

Jenie Rae Hunter  10:52   Right. And that was just bad interpretation. That's not you know, how Heavenly Father wants us to feel, EVER!

Allison Dayton  10:58   And my parents never really bought into that idea that they wouldn't be a whole family, you know, but that didn't take away my brother's pain.Yeah. So it's, it's not just a parent, assuring their child, that their beloved child of God, it's all of us, assuring each other, that we are beloved children of our Heavenly Parents. I mean, that takes all of us to cure this all every Sunday school teacher, every seminary teacher, every neighbor, just like Wow, you are a child of God. And there are new our favorite and there's nothing that can take you away from that birthright. 

Jenie Rae Hunter  11:52   Yeah, you are not. You were made not despite his plan, you're part of his plan. Right? You know, to really feel that deep inside. And, you know, I love like, we are all the plan of salvation. You know, we hear a lot of like, Well, where's my child, he's not in the plan of salvation anymore. And I love where in the typical guy that says, the plan of salvation and the premortal existence, Heavenly Father procured a plan to enable us to become like Him and receive a fullness of joy. Because of this plan, we can be perfected through the atonement, receive a fullness of joy, and live forever in the presence of God, our family relationships can last throughout the eternities. And I really subject that we really know, we know less about the plan of salvation than we really like, there's so much more we don't know.  Yeah, I think we have a very scarcity, very focused in view of the planet salvation, that heavenly Father has a much bigger view. And that there is like President Ballard said that there's room for all members in that God's kingdom. And so when we say messages that get when we we just have to be careful how we are teaching, the doctrine interpreting the doctrine, and that we're not othering people because that is what's happened. And I want to teach the doctrine, I love the doctrine of Jesus Christ and love our gospel. And we have to be more careful with how we interpret it and how our words are being said.

Allison Dayton  13:18   One of the thingsas you were talking about the Plan of Salvation, so I loved Tammy Uzelac, call on the Sunday on Monday podcast Instagram account said one day, she had, it's a devil in Greek, it means one who separates. And this is, this is the what's happening here, we're separating somebody out of eligibility or the circle I always say we have to redraw or reframe the family so that everybody's back in the family and we we know that the Lord sent us each here with equal potential to get back to him and that was the plan that was the plan that started in in Eden, right? We had we had to be cast out of an Eden to or Adam and Eve did to be able to, educate ourselves as we fight thorns and thistles and noxious weeds, and that's an education that we are working on. All the while to get back to our, you know, to come at the end of the day to the fount to the altar, and pray to the Lord and say, what, what do we need to know and we're blind in this but it was for all children. And I often say to people, there's there's no Heaven without my brother, and my son.

I love that.

I mean, that's, that's our belief, right? That we are sealed together as families and bound together as family. So I just I revel in the comfort of that, and we don't understand we have no answers. But as mothers, we know, the beauty and the divinity of these children, and the more mothers we talk to the more stories of the Lord helping them in the wilderness to understand these children and to strengthen them,

Jenie Rae Hunter  15:49   I think we're talking about this today because, you know, I love that the church has given us so much authority of parents where, you know, once again, we're home center church supported, centers, groups, focus, supportive, yes, church supported, where, you know, you really have this personal authority as parents, to guide your the message that your children hear about the gospel of Jesus Christ. And I love that we have the rule that at any time, you're you could go with any interview with a bishop or state president and sit there with your child and make sure the messages are in with align with what you're telling at church and at you know, I mean, start telling at home, because, you know, there's I love bishops and state presidents, they've worked so hard, right? That like the bishops, to me is the hardest job in the whole church, very little, like training, right? They're thrown into the hardest situations of people's lives, and they have to put their life I just love bishops and bishops wives, I commend you, you're amazing people and you give, give give. And even though I know sometimes, bishops misspeak, right, they just, they're just men, and they're doing the best they can. They're learning. And I know this is because of so many moms I talked to and the bishops, there's no ill intent, I know that. But there is sometimes things that are said that have done damage. I know that has happened in our home with our son. And so I think, like, parents, moms, and dads really be prayerful about, you know, the interviews your children are having at church,you know, because there is very different interpretations of like the doctrine and how we're viewing our LGBTQ saints, you know, that you felt that. And so use your personal authority and use the tools that our church has given you to protect your child and to be able to steer your children in the message of their divinity, and that they are whole and not broken?

Allison Dayton  17:48   Well, yeah, as you were saying that I thought it might be a good idea just to have a conversation with the bishop beforehand, before any meetings where you could mention to them, I understand I don't want to limit what you're saying. But I would, I pray that you will pray about focusing on the love of Christ, that light and love of Christ on my child, the entire message. And I just think it's okay, to advocate for valuable messages, those messages will ring in their ears for the rest of their lives.

Jenie Rae Hunter  18:29   Well, they will and because they didn't do that just as much, right? Yeah,

Allison Dayton  18:33   they will be impossible because the bishop is speaking for for God, right?

Jenie Rae Hunter  18:41   Yeah, he has those keys. So

Allison Dayton  18:44   in all humility, you can ask a bishop to be very prayerful. Yeah, about focusing the love of Christ on the child. And you could remind the Bishop that, that your child knows about the doctrine the way it you know, and that wouldn't necessarily need a new lesson on the doctrine because they're very well aware of it. And you talk about it quite a bit in your family and in primary and young woman's and all of it. But that is, that is, that's just you there, then you're giving the bishop a breath, and a moment to really, you he knows what he needs to focus on for this child. And you're not telling him what to say you're just asking him to, to reframe it in in beautiful ways that will that will also exist in this child's head for the rest of their lives, and that can make all the difference.

Jenie Rae Hunter  19:42   Yeah, I don't think you could go wrong and focusing on the love of Christ. And when you said that, I was thinking, I wish I had always done that with my son. Oh my gosh. If I could have done that, like because they're having, 

Allison Dayton  20:00   All of our children, yes, I'm not sure all of my children got a real huge dose every single time I talked to him,

Jenie Rae Hunter  20:09   but I that's what we're striving for. And there have been moments where, unintentionally, I know that I have said, things that Nick took, and brought him shame. And that was painful to realize. But I tell you, and I really want to be vulnerable here with you. When I let go of like, like my shame about it, that I did that costume shame, and had the conversation with him. That was really a powerful moment in our relationship. And we I, all of us, not all of us, but some of his mom say things like no empty chairs and things like that, that we've heard before our child even comes out, we have no idea like we do this from the best intentions. And it we are sometimes part of that message. And don't wait to sit down and talk and apologize. And tell them how your heart where your heart is, and what you've learned and how your heart has changed and how you have new understanding. Because that was really a powerful and beautiful moment for Nick and our andJohn and I. So you know, it's, you know better, you do better. And sometimes you just say things and you don't even know what your child is dealing with. And I know that was part of ours, and then that he came out and, and we even can remember some things. I think then they were brought back to us from him. And we're like, wow, that must have been hurtful. Right? And so sometimes we're part of that message of shame. And I know Allison, you probably weren't because you were so drained by Preston. And it's just a normal life.

Allison Dayton  21:55   I was, you know, I did my fair share of I had my fair share of fear, actually, because of my brother's life. Yeah, I didn't I didn't want the same life for for a child and I did my own damage. We all do. And I didn't even need to, Jake was feeling the pain already. You know what I mean? He was doing it himself, too.

Jenie Rae Hunter  22:16   I think that is such a interesting thing, what you just said, because that is like, it almost feels like and I see this when my LGBTQ clients where it's not the parents, I'm doing the actual LGBT person where they are constantly looking for, do I belong? Am I like they're looking on high alert for evidence? Are they divine? Or are they broken? And so like, You're not even so it's almost like you have to double down with them about there's nothing wrong with you, you are created in God's image, you are divine. You know, you really these messages. I know like you we hear them a lot. But these children need to hear them double, even more double than your other children. Because they really are high alert of like, Is this true? Is the things I've heard, because they're not just other than our church, they're other than our world, let's be honest. And so it's it's, it's a it's a huge message that they are internalizing. And so to really combat that, talk about it say How are you feeling about yourself? Have you prayed, I love when we're interviewing an LGBTQ member on our on our podcast and how they say what changed the game for me is when I finally prayed god of how he felt about me, yep, right. And so encourage your children to gain their because his witness God's witness to them is going to be more powerful than my witness. The bishops witness, anybody's witness, like God's witness is what is going to go to their core. And so I would suggest you be praying about that, to find out how God loves your child for all your children, but we're talking about our LGBTQ today, and and really encourage your child to pray about that. And to connect, sometimes they can't pray, say, go for a walk, ask questions, like whatever you want to go in the woods. Yes. But like, and I love all the time I say to send them I know like how much Heavenly Father loves you because I do like I've gotten it this vision of how much Heavenly Father loves and values and how much the Savior loves and values him and so I that's the message he hears a lot from me like, well, he loves you or he's worried about you or like yeah, I feel that connection with God about how much he loves his child. And that helps me parent the way I think God wants me to do for Nick. Absolutely.

Allison Dayton  24:35   Okay, let me read it and then we'll leave you with that. We take away an LGBTQ child's divinity and replace it with shame when we tell them the way they were born is not part of God's plan. as mothers we assert that any message taught to our children should reassure them they are beloved children of God, and so entitled to all the blessings promised to his faithful children.

Jenie Rae Hunter  24:59   That's declaration Number four, on birth right? And so just ponder these words, pray about these words and find out how as mothers and parents, you could be empowered to make a message more aligned with God's doctrine about your child. WIll you read it one more time. 

Allison Dayton  25:16   Yeah, go ahead and share your thoughts on Instagram On Facebook, where others can see them and we can talk about this and just, we'd love to know what you think we're excited to hear about what you think.

Jenie Rae Hunter  25:31   All right, we love you and sign up for Live, and you can come with us because that's, it's like I said, they're gonna go fast. So we want you to be with us and have you with us. Yes, right. All right, Bye!

 

 

Richard ‘Papa' Ostler is the host of the Listen, Learn and Love podcast (https://listenlearnandlove.org/podcasts) which provides a platform for LGBTQ Latter-day Saints to share their stories.   The podcast library, which contains over 400 stories from those working through complicated issues (repentance, early-release missionaries, emotional illness, faith-crisis).   Richard Ostler is a former YSA bishop who speaks at firesides and conferences about how to more fully embrace LGBTQ Latter-day Saints, see their gifts and contributions, and better understand their unique road. He is deeply committed to The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints and to creating more understanding and support for LGBTQ members--a goal started during his service as a YSA bishop where he learned to set aside past assumptions to better fulfill his stewardship responsibility to meet the spiritual needs of LGBTQ ward members. Richard is the author of Listen Learn and Love:  Embracing LGBTQ Latter-day Saints available Deseret Book (in-store and online at www.deseretbook.com/p/listen-learn-and-love-embracing-lgbtq-latter-day-saints) on Amazon (www.amazon.com/dp/1462135773) and Seagull Book (www.seagullbook.com/Listen-Learn-and-Love-Richard-Ostler.html)

https://www.papaostler.com

Join us for any of our monthly Lift+Love Support Groups - link sign up at Lift+Love Support .

If you would like some personal help on how to do this please sign up for a free consult with Jenie at Jenie Hunter Coaching www.jeniehuntercoaching.com.

For additional support and help please reach out to us on our IG accounts at Lift+Love and Jenie Hunter Coaching

 

We are talking about sex.   Talking to your kids about sex is a high anxiety experience for sure.  For families with an LGBTQ child, this can be totally terrifying.  Allison and @jeniehuntercoaching knew that we needed a real expert to discuss this with.

Dr. Jennifer Finlayson-Fife is an LDS Relationship and Sexuality coach.  If you have not had the chance to listen to Dr. Finlayson-Fife, you are going to love her wisdom and her grounding in the gospel.

Join us as we discuss raising LGBTQ children with a healthy sense of their own sexuality and of their identity as a child of God.

We hope you will share this with friends and family who may also need help a little help raising an amazing LDS LGBTQ child.  

If you would like some personal coaching on how to do this please sign up for a free consult with Jenie at Jenie Hunter Coaching www.jeniehuntercoaching.com.

We would also love for you to join us in our twice monthly Lift+Love Support Groups - to get the link sign up at Lift+Love Support .

For additional support and help please reach out to us on our IG accounts at Lift+Love and Jenie Hunter Coaching

Allison and Jenie had the pleasure of interviewing Patrick Mason and J. David Pulsipher about their new book.  These two men have co-authored the book Proclaim Peace - The Restoration's Answer to an Age of Conflict. This book is a spiritual journey by two believing scholars of peace. In a world plagued by violence, Mason and Pulsipher believe, with President Russell M. Nelson, that “peace is possible” and that the “descendants of Abraham . . . are in a pivotal position to emerge as peacemakers” (“Blessed Are the Peacemakers,” Ensign, Nov. 2002). This book is an effort to lift up the Restoration’s distinctive principles that invite us to renounce violence and proclaim Christ’s good news of love and peace to a world that desperately needs it. Proclaim Peace seeks not to promote any particular ideology, but to invite readers, especially the rising generation, to reflect on the interpersonal, ethical, and social dimensions of Christian discipleshipPatrick Q. Mason is the Leonard J. Arrington Chair of Mormon History and Culture and an associate professor of religious studies and history at Utah State University. He is a nationally recognized authority about the Church in media outlets.

J. David Pulsipher is a professor of history at Brigham Young University–Idaho, where he teaches courses on citizenship, civil discourse, peace-building, and nonviolence .Patrick Q. Mason is the Leonard J. Arrington Chair of Mormon History and Culture and an associate professor of religious studies and history at Utah State University. He is a nationally recognized authority about the Church in media outlets.

It was such a pleasure to hear their perspective and guidance of how to build bridges of peace in our communities and wards.  

 

We are back! Jenie and Allison talk about the behind the Gathering Conference.  Sharing their experience, behind the scenes moments and what they have learned.

To listen to the Gathering Speakers go to Gathering Speakers Youtube

If you are looking to learn the tools and to get the coaching that will help your LGBTQ family thrive while gaining access to other families on this journey than the Lifted Together Community is the place for you.  For details on how to join go to www.liftandlove.org/community

Join us for any of our free monthly Lift+Love Support Groups - link sign up at Lift+Love Support .

For additional support and help please reach out to us on our IG accounts at Lift+Love and Jenie Hunter Coaching

 

Allison and Jenie sit down with Anita Ervin (host of the Lift and Love non-binary parenting support groups) and how to council with your children in the uncomfortable moments. 

When we don't get a vote but we still want to be a voice in our children's decisions.  For instance, if your transgender child wants to seek medical affirming care but you might not agree with the decision.  How do you best help your child?

1. Create emotional distance when possible (i.e. make sure I'm not speaking from a place of fear)
2. Focus on the underlying questions rather than the specific situation. For example:

• Resolving relationship conflict
• Addressing relationship expectations
• Finding trustworthy medical and psychological care
• Making wise medical decisions

3. Use available (and reliable) resources:

• Reliable medical sources
• Trusted professionals
• Knowledgeable friends (when appropriate)
• Books (use with caution)
• Informative podcasts, especially those with guests who are open about their personal experiences
• Support groups

4. Seek divine inspiration. Heavenly Father understands the position we are in. He will not abandon us when we have the best interests of our loved ones at heart. 5. Don't be afraid to decline the opportunity to give counsel if it's too much for you. Let them know you don't feel like you are in a place that you can share insight with them about it, but that you love them and you're working to overcome your discomfort with the situation because they matter to you.   Join us for any of our free monthly Lift+Love Support Groups - link sign up at Lift+Love Support .

 

If you are looking to learn the tools and to get the coaching that will help your LGBTQ family thrive while gaining access to other families on this journey you can work 1:1 with Jenie at www.jeniehuntercoaching.com

For additional support and help please reach out to us on our IG accounts at Lift+Love and Jenie Hunter Coaching

 

 

Join us today to discuss parenting Transgender children with Lift+Love’s new Trans, Non-binary Parent Group Leader, Anita Ervin.  Allison and Jenie talk with Anita about how she balances her testimony and supporting her child.  Anita says, "For years I thought the Church had all of the answers to life and its challenges, but I have since learned to get comfortable in the space of “I don’t know”.

I have had to distill the essence of the gospel down to its most important parts, and at the core of everything is Jesus Christ and his Atonement. He is real, and so is His grace. I can move forward with faith in Christ, faith in the restored gospel, and hope for the eternal destiny of ALL of my children because I know that Jesus Christ is big enough to handle all of the messiness of our mortal lives.

 

Join us for any of our monthly Lift+Love Support Groups - link sign up at Lift+Love Support .

If you would like some personal coaching on how to do this please sign up for a free consult with Jenie at Jenie Hunter Coaching www.jeniehuntercoaching.com.

For additional support and help please reach out to us on our IG accounts at Lift+Love and Jenie Hunter Coaching

 

David navigates a unique journey in The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints as an openly gay man. David is currently serving as the Brandon Stake Executive Secretary. He shares his thoughtful testimony of Jesus Christ with Allison and Jenie and talks about what it was like growing up in the LDS church and gratefully does not sugar-coat the brutally hard parts.There is so much to learn in David's story.

 

You will walk away, from this conversation, with a changed heart for our LGBTQ members and will learn how Heavenly Father is mindful of all his children. 

 

  David Doyle's Blog  (https://nerdygaymormon.tumblr.com/post/159164583009/so-do-you-remember-the-guy-in-yesterdays-general)   Example of a video that David Doyle made of the stake presidency (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GRMDXsobNls)   Example of video David Doyle created for Stake Youth Conference: (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uVhb0HQLGQA).  

Join us for any of our monthly Lift+Love Support Groups - ink sign up at Lift+Love Support .

If you would like some personal coaching on how to do this please sign up for a free consult with Jenie at Jenie Hunter Coaching www.jeniehuntercoaching.com.

For additional support and help please reach out to us on our IG accounts at Lift+Love and Jenie Hunter Coaching

 

Most parent's have great fear on what is going to happen with their testimony when their child comes out.  Can they stay in the church and support their LGBTQ child?  Anita Irvin, Allison and Jenie talk about how they have managed this path and share what they needed to do to protect their testimony and how they grew their faith of Jesus Christ

If you are looking to learn the tools and to get the coaching that will help your LGBTQ family thrive while gaining access to other families on this journey than the Lifted Together Community is the place for you.  For details on how to join go to www.liftandlove.org/community

Join us for any of our free monthly Lift+Love Support Groups - link sign up at Lift+Love Support .

For additional support and help please reach out to us on our IG accounts at Lift+Love and Jenie Hunter Coaching

 

 

 

Have you ever listened to a talk that everybody seems to love and you are left with feeling less hope and more fear?

Allison and Jenie recently experienced this and they discuss in this episode how to process and find peace.

If you are looking to learn the tools and to get the coaching that will help your LGBTQ family thrive while gaining access to other families on this journey than the Lifted Together Community is the place for you.  For details on how to join go to www.liftandlove.org/community

Join us for any of our free monthly Lift+Love Support Groups - link sign up at Lift+Love Support .

For additional support and help please reach out to us on our IG accounts at Lift+Love and Jenie Hunter Coaching

 

Jenie and Allison talk about the lessons they have learned by loving their LGBTQ family members.  Jenie learned that she found out that she had some "blind-spots" when her son came out and how his coming out changed her ability to love herself and others. Allison and Jenie share their lessons learned and how this journey changed them. Listen to this episode if you want to learn the path to loving your LGBTQ family members unconditionally.

If you would like some personal coaching on how to do this please sign up for a free consult with Jenie at Jenie Hunter Coaching www.jeniehuntercoaching.com.

We would also love for you to join us in our twice monthly Lift+Love Support Groups - to get the link sign up at Lift+Love Support .

For additional support and help please reach out to us on our IG accounts at Lift+Love and Jenie Hunter Coaching

Declaration of Divinity - Part 6

Declaration of Divinity - Part 6 - SEEKING As stated in Article Faith 9, “We believe that… He will yet reveal many great and important things pertaining to the Kingdom of God.” As mother's we are pleading for greater gospel light to shine on our LGBTQ children. We invite all members to join us in asking the Savior for further understanding of the plan for HIS LGBTQ children.

Join us for any of our monthly Lift+Love Support Groups - link sign up at Lift+Love Support .

If you are looking to learn the tools and to get the coaching that will help your LGBTQ family thrive while gaining access to other families on this journey than the Lift and Love Community is the place for you.  For details on how to join go to www.liftandlove.org/community

For additional support and help please reach out to us on our IG accounts at Lift+Love and Jenie Hunter Coaching

 

Jenie and Allison sit down and talk to Jessica from Husband In Law podcast.   Steve and Jessica were happily married for 7 years until Steve came out as being gay which inevitably ended in divorce. Now, Matt and Jessica have been happily married for over 8 years. The crazy part is, Matt, Jessica, and Steve all get along, to the extent that Matt and Steve work together, every dang day… Don’t worry you will get all the details while you listen. Matt, Jessica, and Steve have a relationship that, by most standards, would be considered atypical.  Listen in as Jessica takes us on their  journey of learning how to love and accept themselves enough to love and accept others for who they are during this experience called “Life”.

Husband in Law Podcast

Husband in Law Instagram Account

If you are looking to learn the tools and to get the coaching that will help your LGBTQ family thrive while gaining access to other families on this journey than the Lift and Love Community is the place for you.  For details on how to join go to www.liftandlove.org/community

Join us for any of our free monthly Lift+Love Support Groups - link sign up at Lift+Love Support .

For additional support and help please reach out to us on our IG accounts at Lift+Love and Jenie Hunter Coaching

 

 

 

 

Nikki Harmon discusses how important it is to keep safe communication open, to supporting your LGBTQ family.  Nikki also shares with Jenie and Allison a real experience where she shifted from anger to curiosity, and how it changed everything!!!

To get in contact with Nikki Harmon reach out to her on her IG account Nikki Harmon

If you would like some personal coaching on how to do this please sign up for a free consult with Jenie at Jenie Hunter Coaching www.jeniehuntercoaching.com.

We would also love for you to join us in our twice monthly Lift+Love Support Groups - to get the link sign up at Lift+Love Support .

For additional support and help please reach out to us on our IG accounts at Lift+Love and Jenie Hunter Coaching

Jenie and Allison talk with John Gustav-Wrathall about his journey as a LDS gay man.  John grew up in a faithful LDS family and served a mission and attended BYU.  At the end of his BYU student career he decided to leave the church because he couldn't find a way to honor his sexuality and stay in the church.  John's shares his powerful story about his relationship with Christ and his journey back to attending the LDS faith as a man how is in a committed gay marriage.

Since his returning to church with his LDS brother and sisters, John has founded Emmaus LGBTQ Ministry.   Emmaus is a community of heterosexual/cisgender and LGBTQ Latter-day Saints who are called to ministry for the safety, well-being and happiness of LGBTQ people in and adjacent to The Church of Jesus Christ

John Gustav-Wrathall is a published scholar and teacher in the fields of LGBTQ history and American religion and a former president and executive director of Affirmation. He is active in the Lake Nokomis Ward of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints. He and his husband of almost three decades are parents of a gay foster son and live in south Minneapolis.

While many would insist that he choose between his husband or his Church, Gustav-Wrathall has written, "I could not reject either and remain a person of integrity. I could not be disloyal to either and not feel that at some level I was betraying both myself and God."

https://www.emmauslgbtq.org

https://www.facebook.com/groups/emmauslgbtq/

Join us for any of our monthly Lift+Love Support Groups - link sign up at Lift+Love Support .

If you need some one-on-one guidance for you and your family. Please sign up for a free consult with Jenie at Jenie Hunter Coaching www.jeniehuntercoaching.com.

For additional support and help please reach out to us on our IG accounts at Lift+Love and Jenie Hunter Coaching

 

Join us today to discuss what to do when you feel spiritually stuck.  When we are raising LGBTQ children you can hit some spiritual pit falls or road blocks.  It is important to learn to recognize when you hit those times and how to get unstuck. Allison and Jenie discuss 3 ways to get spiritually unstuck.  

Join us for any of our monthly Lift+Love Support Groups - link sign up at Lift+Love Support .

If you would like some personal coaching on how to do this please sign up for a free consult with Jenie at Jenie Hunter Coaching www.jeniehuntercoaching.com.

For additional support and help please reach out to us on our IG accounts at Lift+Love and Jenie Hunter Coaching

 

It is absolutely normal to go through a range of emotions when a child comes out.  Jenie and Allison talk about their individual journeys and how they each reconciled their own feelings and created a healthy space for their faith and their family. 

Worksheet to help you daily process your emotions: Daily Thought Worksheet

If you would like some personal coaching on how to do this please sign up for a free consult with Jenie at Jenie Hunter Coaching www.jeniehuntercoaching.com.

We would also love for you to join us in our twice monthly Lift+Love Support Groups - to get the link sign up at Lift+Love Support .

For additional support and help please reach out to us on our IG accounts at Lift+Love and Jenie Hunter Coaching