Ladies, We Need To Talk (ABC listen)

We know you love the podcast and now there’s Ladies We Need to Talk the book! 

What if you could read something that would radically change your sex life and your whole relationship dynamic? What if, a few pages could actually make you feel like sex with your long-term partner?

Cue the case for erotic literature — the nerdy aphrodisiac you didn't know you needed. Low sex drive affects many of us, including Sally, who says erotica has increased her libido 10-fold. You'll also hear from Kate Cuthbert from the Victorian Writers Centre and Gina Gutierrez from an audio-erotica company on how erotica is evolving.

At some point, most mums ask 'is this really what I want?'. Sure motherhood means cuddles, love and macaroni necklaces. It also means sleepless nights, tantrums and vomiting bugs. But what happens when you genuinely regret motherhood? Or find yourself choosing not to raise your children?

Your day is finally over, the kids are in bed, and you get a moment's peace. But then, your partner gives you the nudge and you're ready for sex! Right? Nope. Low sex drive is pretty common for women, but why is that? And how can that be fixed?

You're a woman who makes a point of not hurting other women's feelings. But have you ever considered that the way you talk about your own body could be making other women feel like crap?

Masturbation is still a conversation stopper for many women. There are some really good reasons, though, why we need to move on from our embarrassment and start talking about women's pleasure.

Guess who is way worse off in pandemics? Yup — women. While we're leading the charge on the frontline by slogging away in jobs like nursing, teaching and aged care, our purses are copping a flogging now and into the future. More women than men have lost their jobs during this crisis and there are no prizes for picking who does the lion's share of home-schooling. COVID-19 is creating a gendered storm of pandemic proportions (sorry, we couldn't help ourselves).

The good news is, other women are the ones helping us through this crisis. Gender inclusion commentator, Amy Haddad, says we have some very finely honed skills in just shovelling through shit. And, you know, we just keep on shovelling.

On every form you ever fill out, there’s always a tick box about your romantic status — de facto, married, single. Why are we only judged on romantic relationships rather than some of the most important bonds in our life — our friendships? Yumi Stynes writes a love letter to our friends and casually invites herself into the wonderful friendship of Jamila Rizvi and Clare Bowditch.

If you’re in your 30s and have had an abortion or are going to, you’re not going through it alone. It’s a myth that only the young and reckless have abortions. The stats show that older women, and those who already have kids, are having more abortions in Australia than teenagers. So if they’re the facts, why is abortion shrouded in shame, judgement and silence for older women?

Cradle snatcher, sugar-daddy, toy-boy, cougar… all of those terms are loaded with baggage and undermine the relationships they describe. Beyond the stereotypes, what's it like to be in a relationship with a big age gap?

Yumi Stynes meets women who are defying the research and dating way out of their age range… and loving it, even if their friends and family aren't so enamoured.

Featured in this episode:

Dr Grace Lordan, Associate Professor at the London School of Economics and Political Science

Warning: explicit content. One in five women in Australia has had anal sex. It's everywhere in porn and many of us, especially young women, are feeling the pressure to do it. It's uncomfortable discussing anal sex, so let's talk about it. Dr Nikki Goldstein sets out how to negotiate anal sex including consent and Professor Cicely Marston tells us how anal sex typically plays out for young people.

Warning: Explicit Content. Is anal the last taboo? One in five women in Australia has had anal sex. It's everywhere in porn and many of us, especially young women, are feeling the pressure to do it. It's uncomfortable discussing anal sex, but ladies, we need to talk about it.

Everyone gets a little bit anxious at times, but is what you’re feeling normal? Anxiety is the most common mental health issue in Australia. Up to one in three women will experience anxiety, for men it’s one in five.

So why are women going through this? And if you are, what can you do about it?

Crisis linesLifeline on 13 11 14Kids Helpline on 1800 551 800MensLine Australia on 1300 789 978Suicide Call Back Service on 1300 659 467Beyond Blue on 1300 22 46 36Headspace on 1800 650 890QLife on 1800 184 527Chat servicesElefriends SaneeHeadspace  Beyondblue

While one in three women will experience anxiety in normal circumstances, when COVID-19 hit, for many it was the first time they'd ever felt anxious. And for many of us, that feeling isn't going away because there's a lot to be anxious about - pandemics, climate change, money, kids and the list goes on. To help, we're revisiting an episode we did in season 2 in which Dr Charlotte Keating coaches us through climate change anxiety. Her advice is super relevant for if you're feeling anxious. Lifeline: 13 11 14 Beyond Blue: 1300 22 46 36 Headspace: 1800 650 890

Many of us like a glass of wine to help put a line under our day, and research tells us more Australian women are drinking than ever before. So why do we like to drink? And would you know if your drinking was heading down a hazardous path?

In a world obsessed with sex, what if you never (or rarely) want it? Yumi Stynes meets women from across the asexuality spectrum to find out how they navigate dating and relationships in a sexed-up world.

Featured in the episode: Angela Chen, author of Ace: What Asexuality Reveals About Desire, Society, and the Meaning of Sex

Resources: https://www.australianasexuals.com/

Rooting around is as inescapable as laundry and taxes. While humans all around the world make promises to be with each other through sickness and health, to be loyal to the exclusion of all others, it doesn't always work out that way.

Join Yumi Stynes as she discovers what it's like to have your partner do the dirty and how to decide whether to stay or go after being screwed over.

Featured in this episode: Christina Spaccavento, Sex and relationships counsellor.

More people are living the single life than ever before. But what if you don’t need a partner to feel whole? In a world that wants you to couple up, is being single the new happily ever after?

We're totally spoilt for choice when it comes to birth control. There are 12 different types of contraception to choose from and about 30 different brands of the pill. Having all these options is awesome, but how do you know you've chosen the right one for you?

"Have a baby," they said. "It'll be great," they said. But what they didn't say, was that getting that kid out could leave you traumatised. Physically and mentally.

One in three Australian women describe their birth as traumatic. Yumi Stynes hears how different women are still coming to terms with their birth experiences, sometimes years later, and finds out what can be done to prevent traumatic births.

Thanks to the pandemic, we now spend even MORE time doom scrolling through obnoxiously perfect Insta-people, and endlessly staring at our own faces via zoom than ever and (surprise, surprise) it's had a negative impact on our self-esteem. Yumi Stynes catches up with body image and eating disorder expert, Dr Gemma Sharpe, about "zoom dysmorphia" and what can we do to feel better about ourselves, one video call at a time.

Have you ever felt like a massive failure when you've looked in the mirror or felt depressed about the size of your thighs? You're not alone — research says almost 80 per cent of Australian women are unhappy with their weight. And nearly one million Australians have an eating disorder, most of them, women. What can we do to feel better about our bodies?

We’ve been inundated with single ladies flying the solo flag with pride. We asked you; what do you love about your single life? What have you been able to achieve because you’re single? What would you happily never hear again from your coupled-up mates? Here are your stories.

The response to our last episode was extraordinary. We asked you; what do you wish people knew about pregnancy loss? What’s the best thing to say? How can we better support family or friends who are dealing with it? Here are your stories.

You’ll have heard of the glass ceiling — the invisible barrier that stops women getting ahead at work. For women of colour, that ceiling is actually concrete. And while you can (sometimes) shatter a glass ceiling, the concrete ceiling is a much tougher barrier to smash. At a live recording of Ladies, We Need To Talk, Yumi Stynes speaks with a panel of brilliant women about what it’s like looking up at the concrete ceiling. Our guests were Professor Sujatha Fernandes, Shy Magsalin and Shyamla Eswaran.

This episode is a part of the ABC’s Australia Talks project, which aims to find out what Australians are really thinking and feeling, and uses those findings to help us all learn something about each other.

When was the last time you sat down with your girlfriends and had a conversation about menstrual products? No need to. We did it for you.

Our sex and disability episode really resonated with you. Hear what our listeners had to say about sex and disability. We love your feedback ladies@abc.net.au.

With thanks to Zoe, Lauren, Rose and Rebecca.

Imagine knowing so much about vaginas that you’ve been given an Order of Australia medal. Dr Elizabeth Farrell received the award for her incredible work in women’s health. Warning: This episode contains the odd swear word, frank disclosure and graphic description.

Burnout: It's a word so frequently used that it's almost become a catchphrase. And let's face it, who isn't feeling exhausted? But when does that fatigue and overwhelm tip into burnout?

It’s free, it’s prolific, it’s easy to find and more of us than ever are watching it but is mainstream porn contributing to the exploitation of women? Is it normalising bedroom practices that are problematic? Or is it just good, dirty fun? Warning: contains explicit material.

When most of us picture our clitoris, we think of it as being the size of a tiny jellybean. But sisters, your clitoris is so much more than that! It's going to blow your mind just how amazing the clitoris is. You'll hear from the woman who 'discovered' it, Australian doctor, Helen O'Connell.

Brace yourself. Leave your judgement at the door. And embrace a head first dive into those tricky topics that we’re all thinking about, but don’t feel comfortable talking about out loud.

You'd think a pandemic would stop all romance and the dating game. But it's seen an acceleration of relationships and romance as some single people panic bought partners like toilet paper. Ladies Producer Cassandra Steeth takes a look at love in the time of coronavirus and lets us peek into her new relationship too.

Whether you're juggling working at home with kids or figuring out how to pay rent as a single mum after losing your job — life just got a whole lot tougher for women. Many women are on the front line of fighting coronavirus at home and self-isolation is feeling like total chaos. In the first episode of season 4 Yumi Stynes dives into your corona shitshow and talks with clinical psychologist Dr Jacqui Winship about ways you can make lockdown a little more bearable.

You're more likely to meet your partner on an app than any other way. But between the constant swiping, messaging, rejections, ghosting and d&*k pics, it can be rough. Yumi Stynes talks to a bunch of awesome single women about their approach to dating apps and how to stay sane, safe and maintain your self-esteem while swiping.

Lots of women are really self-conscious about the way their vaginas smell. We quickly hide our undies the second we take them off and up to a third of us wear a panty liner every day. But how much do you actually know about discharge? What should it smell like? What should it look like? And should we just stop dissing our discharge?

One in four Australian women have experienced emotional abuse from a partner. You don't get physically hurt, but psychologically it's devastating and it erodes your identity and trust in yourself. Hear from Investigative Journalist Jess Hill and Inez Carey from 1800 Respect about how you can recognize, and stop, emotional abuse.

Monogamy is the default, but for lots of people it doesn't work. More and more people are actively looking for alternatives to monogamy, according to research. So why are many of us abandoning monogamy in favour of polyamorous and open relationships?

How do you tell a mate your friendship isn't working? Or a partner you can't stand the way they kiss? Hard conversations are tough to have but sometimes necessary. Psychotherapist Esther Perel is the world's best known couples counsellor and she gives Yumi a lesson on how to navigate difficult conversations.

The prospect of dying is an abstract thing, something we try hard not to think about at all costs.

But what if the one dying…is you? Join Yumi Stynes as she meets women who are facing their own death head-on and learns how to hard those hard conversations about the end of your life.

Featured in this episode:

Dr Kerrie Noonan, Clinical Psychologist and founder of the Death Literacy Institute.

What really turns you on? Getting your toes sucked? Latex? High-heeled shoes? Fetish is a word that can be overused without us really thinking about its meaning. Sexologist Dr Sarah Ashton helps us figure out what a fetish actually is, where fetishes come from and why it's A-OK to have one. We'll also find out what it's like to be the object of someone else's fetish.

Grow up, find a partner, have kids — we’ve been doing it for thousands of years. But more and more women are choosing to ignore that path. And the latest research says they’re actually happier for it. So why do we judge women without kids?

When was the last time you talked about foreplay? Women tend to need more foreplay than men — so if your partner’s just a bit crap at foreplay — get them to listen to this. We talk to psychotherapist Esther Perel and a bunch of brilliant female experts about their best foreplay tips.

Ladies, it's time for a refresher course on foreplay! Yumi Stynes talks to psychotherapist Esther Perel and a bunch of brilliant female experts about their best foreplay tips. We're here to talk about it. Ring us on 1300 641 222 or email ladies@abc.net.au.

Have you noticed that most women have long hair, and most men have short hair? And how grey-haired men are silver foxes and women old and witchy?

What's with these unspoken hair rules? And why the hell are we conforming? Yumi Stynes gets to the root of why women's hair is such a big deal and teases out why we're so tangled up in knots about our locks.

Featured in this episode: Author Tara Moss; Kellie Scott @Hairlossboss; Shantel Wetherall, Host of Hey Aunty podcast.

It can take months or years to get through a breakup, and the fallout can be totally devastating. Whether it's money, legal stuff, kids, or all the feelings, we're giving you practical tools to break up well and flourish afterwards. Writer Zoe Foster Blake teaches us how we can keep our dignity in a breakup and see it as a 'gift'.

At a certain point in life, making friends gets trickier and feels super awkward. Many of us want and need new friends though — so how do you do it? At a live recording of Ladies, We Need To Talk, Yumi Stynes and a panel of amazing women chat about why having good friends is so important and give advice for making new ones.

Ladies! Listen up: we're back and we've missed you! Join Yumi Stynes as she dives right in to all the taboo lady-business that women find tricky to talk about. Whether it's your fetish, what the hell happens to us in old age or dealing with the rage in our pelvis — Ladies, we've got your back. We love your feedback so please leave us a voicemail on 1300 641 222 or email ladies@abc.net.au. Follow Ladies, We Need To Talk now so you never miss an episode, oh, and tell ALL your girlfriends.

Welcome to season six of Ladies, We Need to Talk. This time around we're turning the steam up to 11, dropping our towels and baring all. Join Yumi Stynes as she learns the ins-and-outs of swinging; meets later-in-life lesbians; finds out what it's like to be asexual and talks to women who've gone from having ho-hum sex to mind-blowing romps. It's hot and hilarious and we're here for it. Call us on 1300 641 222 or email ladies@abc.net.au. Follow in your fave podcast app so you never miss an episode.

We’re back! Season two is coming and this time, we’re calling on you - our sisters out there. What's in your treasure chest of taboos you feel like you can't tell anyone, but seriously need to get off your chest?We’re here to talk about it. Ring us on 1300 641 222 or email ladies@abc.net.au.

Women don’t orgasm as often as men during sex. A US study of 50,000 people found 95% of men orgasm during sex, but only 65 per cent of straight women do.

You trusted us with some of your deepest, darkest and most intimate secrets and you let us share them with the podcast universe.

For our final episode of 2018, we check in with the women we’ve met and hear from YOU about what you’ve learnt.    

Boobies, tits, cans, your rack. Ladies, we want to celebrate your boobs. Despite what the beauty mags tell you, boobs come in all shapes and sizes. Some are big, some small, some are great at breastfeeding, others are not. Some women love their boobs, others get new ones. This episode talks about, and celebrates, all the boobs.

What happens if you want a baby but you're running out of time? Maybe you haven't found the right partner, or you've found the right one, but they don't want kids? You just can't seem to get pregnant or you're simply too busy having an awesome life and heaps of fun to have a baby. And then suddenly, your 'fertile window' starts to close.

Yumi Stynes finds out what it's like to have one last shot at pregnancy.

Featured in this episode: Dr Karin Hammarberg (VARTA), Senior research fellow, School of Public Health and Preventive Medicine, Monash University.

Fertility resources: yourIVFsuccess.com.au; VARTA; yourfertility.org.au

In many ways we're OK with periods, but we've still got a way to go. Because it's one thing to ask for a tampon, it's a whole other story when you leak onto your clothes. So how do we finally slay menstrual taboos?

Imagine going down on a woman for the very first time in your 50s. Yumi Stynes meets later-in-life lesbians who, after years of hetero partnerships and raising kids, are coming out. Were they always attracted to women or can our sexuality shift?

Featured in this episode: Dr Lisa Diamond Professor of Psychology and Gender Studies, University of Utah.

Call: 1300 641 222 | Email: ladies@abc.net.au

How often have you casually heard the terms "bitch" or "mean girl" being used to describe another woman? And, be honest, how often have you used them? In a world where we’re sold the idea that women constantly compete, compare and undermine each other, what are the invisible forces that shape the way we treat each other? And how can we stop, and strengthen the sisterhood instead?

You can't help who you fall in love with. But what happens if your family disapproves? Every relationship has its challenges, but for lovers from a completely different cultural and ethnic background, Yumi Stynes finds out that race, religion and tradition can add multiple layers of complication.

Featured in this episode: Dr Reenee Singh, Psychologist and Systemic Psychotherapist specialising in Intercultural couples.

Fresh from a season on sex, Yumi Stynes is leaping out of the sack, changing the sheets and delving deep into the stuff that keeps us up at night. We're making a big stink about our fear of farting; learning how to nip burnout in the bud and unearthing the dirty truth about "clean eating".

Imagine you've been having ho-hum, pedestrian sex your entire life and BAM! A new trick, a new partner, a revelation about yourself or a total life change and suddenly you've crossed into a new sexual dimension. Colours are brighter, the birds are singing and the sex is mind-blowing, Meet the women who have levelled-up and find out how they got to the promised-land. The land of Best. Sex. Ever.

If we are intelligent, ambitious and capable women, why are we still judged by the way we look?

The Australasian College of Cosmetic Surgery estimates that Australians spend around $1 billion a year on cosmetic procedures. Most of that is spent on botox and fillers.

So if we’re spending so much money on looking young, are we complicit in society’s obsession with youth?

Sore boobs, loss of libido, hot flushes, irregular periods. Sound familiar? While you may think you’ll only experience these symptoms when you’re of a 'certain age' and hitting menopause, it turns out, they can creep in way earlier.

Welcome to perimenopause!  And if you think that’s years down the track, think again.

Caring for partners is something women do well and often. But what's the limit, how do you know if your support is causing more harm than good and how do you do it without sacrificing yourself? We speak to women propping up their partner through issues like depression, addiction and suicide.

Lifeline: 13 11 14Beyond Blue: 1300 22 46 361800 Respect:1800 737 732

We're back! Join Yumi Stynes as she once again tears open the sealed section on life to talk all about your forbidden lady business. This is the podcast where we can confess all our secret ladies' stuff and learn something along the way. So, whether it's your discharge, what you use for birth control, or how you can make a new friend ... we're here for you! Ring us on 1300 641 222 or email ladies@abc.net.au. Subscribe now so you never miss an episode.

A healthy relationship is meant to feel like a warm hug from your mum after about a year, according to psychologists. But if your partner doesn’t feel like your perfect soul mate all the time, you might feel like you settled for something you didn’t sign up to. So does 'settling' exist or is it just a reality of long-term monogamy?

One in five Australian women over the age of 15 have experienced sexual violence. 1.4 million Australians have lived through childhood sexual abuse.So if that’s you, how do you find the courage to be intimate again? For this episode we speak to women who’ve struggled to have sex after sexual assault, and others who now have a healthy sex life.Life Line: 13 11 141800 Respect: 1800 737 732

Around one in five Australian women live with a disability. And guess what? They're having sex. Hot, creative sex. But steamy conversations about what it's like to love and lust with a disability are often considered too "out there" to talk about. Join Robyn Lambird, Madeleine Stewart, Akii Ngo and Yumi Stynes for a raunchy chat about Sex and the D-word — from insane orgasms to stumping, 'moot pain' to Paralympic thirst.

Forget juice cleanses, meditation and yoni eggs, is a sex detox the best way to reset our thinking around sex and relationships to find out what really presses our buttons? Yumi Stynes talks to women who have flipped the script on sex, who've hit the pause button and are feeling better for it. Featured in this episode: Catherine Gray — Author of The Unexpected Joy of Being Single.

A movement's begun to expose the mental load women shoulder. All that relentless, unpaid, thankless and invisible work women do. Naming it is powerful, right? But we want solutions! Author Eve Rodsky breaks down the mental load and teaches you how to spread the mental load more evenly with our partners — hallelujah!

Around four million Australians have had an STI at some point in their life, but who ever talks about it? STI’s are shrouded in loads of shame, secrecy and regret. And it’s not just young people getting them — women in their 30s and 40s get them too. In fact, the number of older people getting them is actually growing. We smash the stigma and learn that women living with an STI aren’t alone.

In season one, we looked at why so many Australian women drink at risky levels. Yumi Stynes revealed her battle with drinking and quit alcohol. We also met Jo, who drank at really risky levels. This episode, we check back in, to see how they're going, plus show you how to cut down your drinking if you'd like to sub the wine for kombucha.

What's it like to watch your partner have sex with another person? What about a group of people? Welcome to the world of swingers, where couples "play" with each other and with the boundaries of sexual expression. Join Yumi Stynes at a sex club as she pulls back the orgy room curtain and meets women who swing to find out why they love 'The Lifestyle' and how it's transformed their relationships.

With special thanks to Juliet Richters, Honorary Professor of the Sexual Health Program at the Kirby Institute. Thanks also to Jess Cattelly from Our Secret Spot.

Sex is more available and permissible than ever before, but despite this, are we actually getting any pleasure?  Lots of women still don’t feel entitled to sexual fulfillment and aren’t in touch with what feels good, let alone how to ask for it.

The first trimester of a pregnancy can often be the hardest, so why do so many women feel the need to stay quiet? And what if the answer — miscarriage — is the reason we should be talking about pregnancy earlier?

Women are pretty bad at saying no — we're socialised to please and serve others. Author of F*** No!, Sarah Knight, political commentator Jamilla Rizvi and emotional intelligence coach Rachel Green are going to teach you how to say no, and do it unapologetically.

It's no secret women spend way more time, energy and hard-earned cash on our appearances than men do. But what else could we be firing our mental bullets at if we weren't so worried about what the hell we looked like? Researcher, Dr Phillipa Deidrichs, says the focus many of us place on what we see in the mirror is stopping us from fully functioning.

Do you feel embarrassed if you have to poo in public? You're not alone. Whether it's poo, farts, discharge or sweat — women are constantly self-conscious about our odour because it's considered 'unladylike' to smell. But if everyone on the planet needs to poo to survive, why do we have such poo shame? And if poo is on top of the list of things we feel awkward talking about, how do we know when something's going wrong with our bowels? So, Ladies, let's talk about poo.

Do you wee when you sneeze? Or avoid star jumps at the gym? One in four of us experience pelvic floor problems which can lead to incontinence, or even prolapse.

Nearly one million Australian women live with persistent pain in their pelvis. Yumi Stynes finds out what the hell it is, what causes it and most importantly, how to get through the day with a raging pelvis. If you need help dealing with your pelvic pain, www.pelvicpain.org.au has loads of helpful advice.

Featured in this episode: Dr Susan Evans, Gynaecologist and Pelvic Pain Physician; Gabrielle Jackson, Associate News Editor of Guardian Australia and author of Pain and Prejudice.

Every month you go on a hormonal rollercoaster but most of us ride it blindfolded. Reproductive hormones control ovulation but they can also affect how you think. Oestrogen can make you feel fantastic, while progesterone can make you feel crappy. And for women who are hormonally sensitive, this rollercoaster can feel like a freefall.

Sex, babies, periods, discharge. Our vaginas do a lot. But how well do you really know your vagina? Get comfy for a guided tour of your vagina with Dr Elizabeth O'Farrell. Plus, you'll meet Deanna, owner of possibly the world's most adventurous vagina, and Louise, who learnt something about her vagina at 53 that completely changed her life.

Most of us have a secret we've never told anyone. Secrets are self-protective and universal, but some are hard to keep and impossible to share. If your secret is eating you up or has the propensity to blow up your entire life — should you share it? Are secrets better out than in?

Dr Katie Greenaway says it depends. Psychotherapist Gillian Straker walks us through the shame some secrets bring and what kinds we're keeping from ourselves.

You’re cooking dinner, answering work emails, calling the tradie, and getting the kids bathed. All at the same time. It’s no wonder you feel like you're an octopus, juggling tasks. All of this work you do is invisible, ongoing, exhausting and, mostly, unrewarding. Want to know what it's called? And better still, how to banish it?

Pubic hair — it's one of the most scrutinised patches of hair on our bodies. Research says 80 per cent of women groom their hair regularly. But why? What's really behind our choices? Data journalist Mona Chalabi muses on the perceived link between women's pubes and our sanity. Podcaster Maeve Marsden and comedian Christina Zheng debate to pube or not to pube.

There’s a whole lot of mythology around the so-called sacred mother-daughter bond, but it isn’t always reality. Mumming is hard work. It’s a tonne of unpaid emotional and physical labour, and mums don’t always get it right. We speak to women who’ve navigated very fraught relationships with their mums.

Women are still expected to be primary caregivers — but what happens when they choose to walk away from this role? In season one we heard from women who "broke the motherhood contract". They were no longer living with their kids and felt society judged them harshly for it. We check back in to see how those women are going now.

Saggy boobs, cracked vaginas, being invisible, loneliness. Getting older can't all be this grim? CAN IT?!? Yumi Stynes finds out how to stay awesome, mentally and physically, as the years tick by and the mammaries get lower ... and it's not all bad news for our sex lives — HOORAY! With thanks to the amazing group of women at the Bowral Country Women's Association.

Featured in this episode: Professor Cassandra Szoeke, Director of the Healthy Ageing Program at the University of Melbourne; Dr Katherine Campbell, Psychologist; Dr Wendy Vanselow, women's health GP and sex therapist; Faith Agugu, founder of Silver Sirens.

YOU TOLD US AND NOW WE'RE TELLING THE MENFOLK. What we need men to know about sex — from jack-hammering to hygiene to female anatomy 101, nothing's off-limits. If there ever was an episode to share with the blokes in your life, this is it. Featured in this episode: Aleks Trkulja, sex therapist and Nikki Britton, comedian.

We’ve all got a bad sex story. The partner who’s selfish in the sack. The horribly uninspiring one-night stand. The lover with 'performance anxiety'. Most of us have been there. There’s this idea though that we grow out of it — that we all get better at 'doing it' as we get older. But what if that doesn’t happen? What if bad sex is your life?

We've all got a bad sex story. The partner who's selfish in the sack. The horribly uninspiring one-night stand. The lover with 'performance anxiety'. Most of us have been there. There's this idea though that we grow out of it — that sex gets better as we get older. But what if that doesn't happen? What if bad sex is your life?

Featured in this episode:

Lisa Torney, sex and relationship therapist

Sex that feels like your vagina is about to tear open isn’t exactly dinner party conversation, but it’s common. One in five women experience painful sex, according to a study by the University of NSW.

The statistics say the number of women who are unfaithful is massively on the rise. So why? What’s driving those who seek a covert thrill outside their relationship? And does society still judge women who stray more harshly than men?

Warning: this podcast contains strong language and adult themes.

For some women, reaching climax, cumming, the Big O... is as easy as a walk around the block. For others, it’s an arduous, long, steep hike up a mountain, never quite reaching...the “peak”.

What’s the difference between your vulva and vagina? Do you know what your cervix feels like? Can you lose something inside your vagina? Ladies, it’s time for the sex ed lesson we missed out on as teens. Warning: This episode contains the odd swear word, frank disclosure and graphic description.

What happens if you're young and that #1 person, the special love that you searched for and pinned down, the one you expected to love till you were old — dies early? It's painfully lonely to be a young person grieving, but that loneliness can be compounded by the judgement of others on how to grieve.

Yumi Stynes talks to Ellidy Pullin, and other young widows, about life after death.

Support services:

Grief.org.au

Lifeline.org.au

Beyondblue.org.au

There aren't many people on your Instagram feed who are as loved and as loathed as Abbie Chatfield.

Ever since Abbie shot to fame as the slut-shamed villain on The Bachelor Australia in 2019, she's been a public and controversial figure who's hard to look away from.

Five years and almost 500K followers later, Abbie's built an empire on sharing her trauma dumps, UTIs, political rants and sexcapades.

Abbie's openness has earnt her lots of fans but it's also made her the target of sexist and violent online threats.

So how does this former real-estate girly from Brissy manage living a life in the spotlight while staying sane in the real world?

We live in a sex obsessed world, where hook-up culture is king and getting laid out like a spatchcocked chicken is a status symbol. 

But what if you’re a fully-fledged adult, paying your own bills and you’re still a “virgin”? 

Some women might hold off having sex for the first time because they want to meet the “right” person, others because they haven’t had the opportunity or are waiting until marriage. Whatever the reason, it can feel lonely and isolating when there so much noise around sex.  

Yumi Stynes talks to women who haven’t yet had sex, either by choice or circumstance and to another who waited to have sex for over 40 years, until she met her perfect person. 

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Featured in this episode:

• Amanda McCracken, writer on love and limerence

You're on a date and there's a spark, the chat is great, the vibes are flowing. But come the time to disrobe, all that potential sexual brilliance comes crashing down. They're a dud root. So what on earth do you do if you've got a connection with someone, but they're not rocking your socks off? How do you have a conversation about what you like, without hurting their feelings? And can you ever turn a jackhammer into a magical orgasm wand? Yumi Stynes and sex therapist Aleks Trkulja get under the sheets and figure out how to communicate your way to the pleasure palace.

Great sex isn't inevitable. If you're a straight woman, chances are you've enjoyed far fewer orgasms than your sexual partner(s). And yes, we know, it's not just about the big O, but isn't it time the ladies got on equal frotting footing and closed the pleasure gap? Enter: Alyx Gorman.

In her book All Women Want, Alyx investigates what makes for the best sex, how to get there, and how to communicate what you want. She interviews women of different ages and life stages, dives in the science behind good sex and even takes herself to a "musky and primal" sex party.

Alyx sits down with Yumi Stynes to reveal the secrets of what women want: the patterns and home truths about why we aren't satisfied in the bedroom, and how to reach the shiny pinnacle on the other side.

Warning: your productivity may decline significantly after listening as you find yourself bedridden in a hedonistic pleasure dreamland, filled with 100 euphoric orgasms.

This episode contains references to sex, orgasm, orgasm gap, All Women Want, sex parties, orgies, female pleasure, heterosexual, sex, partners, relationships, marriage, masturbation, pleasure.

When you’re stuck in the daily grind of working-mum life, sometimes it can be hard not to feel like a shitty mum.  

School lunches, getting them dressed (FFS), raising good humans, endless meetings – it's exhausting and soul-destroying. 

Yumi has some advice to ease the mum-guilt, when your heart is being yanked in opposite directions and backing away from work isn’t an option.  

If you’ve got a problem that not even your girl gang can help you solve, let us take on the burden! Send an audio note to ladies@abc.net.au