Husband & Wife Sentenced to Life (Simon & Lorra)

Coming soon...

Husband & Wife Sentenced to Life. A married couple talking, bickering, arguing, fighting, laughing, crying and trying to stay together.

Support this show http://supporter.acast.com/husband-wife-sentenced-to-life.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Our first episode. A bit of a dry-run really. We will get around to making proper production and jingles but for now it was about getting in there and attempting to put the marital world to rights.

On today's episode...

A disagreement about chore stats.

Garage sales and selling online.

Some dirty knickers chat.

A "wife's whinge" about a prom issue.

A "husband's hump" about excess glass.

A really gross 'would you rather'.

And a few solid "reccos" for you.

If you'd like to tell us about one (or many) of your marital disputes, email husbandandwifepod@gmail.com and we'll sort them out on the show. Same email address for any communication, feedback or sponsorships (wink wink)

Thanks for listening. At time of writing we're still married.

Support this show http://supporter.acast.com/husband-wife-sentenced-to-life.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Episode 2...

A week of firsts indeed. We've tried allsorts... one of us more than the other.

Also discussed...

Parting company with eggs.

Veggie talk.

A "Wife's Whinge" about two things (we're actually only allowed one. Rules were broken).

A "Husband's Hump" about insufficient 'fillage' (made that word up but it fits).

Lorra forced another (gross) 'Would You Rather?' into the show.

A 'car-gument' (geddit?!)

And a few recommendations for you.

If you'd like to tell us about one (or many) of your marital disputes, email husbandandwifepod@gmail.com and we'll sort them out on the show. Same email address for any communication, feedback or sponsorships (wink wink)

Thanks for listening. At time of writing we're still married.

Support this show http://supporter.acast.com/husband-wife-sentenced-to-life.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Episode 3 with Simon & Lorra.

We talk...

A rare bit of (surprisingly enjoyable) football.

Lorra's stomach problem.

Paul McCartney's Eye Yoga.

Paul McCartney's bagel.

The perils of tweens & the evil internet.

Post-covid office capacity.

A "Wife's Whinge" regarding table choice.

A "Husband's Hump" concerning bikini deposits.

A "Would You Rather?" featuring a swinging sex chair.

Recommendations including Mark Ruffalo's fictional testicular injury.

If you'd like to tell us about one (or many) of your marital disputes, email husbandandwifepod@gmail.com and we'll sort them out on the show. Same email address for any communication, feedback or sponsorships (wink wink)

Thanks for listening. At time of writing we're still married.

Support this show http://supporter.acast.com/husband-wife-sentenced-to-life.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Episode 4...

Blagging the Pfizer.

A big cat in the wild.

A bird in the bedroom.

An animal funeral interruption.

A disappointing fast food move.

A minty "Wife's Whinge".

A "Husband's Hump" about a (ahem) size issue.

A "Would You Rather?"

Recommendations.

Grandma's on the telephone.

If you'd like to tell us about one (or many) of your marital disputes, email husbandandwifepod@gmail.com and we'll sort them out on the show. Same email address for any communication, feedback or sponsorships (wink wink)

Thanks for listening. At time of writing we're still married.

Support this show http://supporter.acast.com/husband-wife-sentenced-to-life.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

First outing for our brand new intro jingle today.

We'd done a bit of sunbathing and Lorra had done a bit of drinking before (and during) today's recording. It shows. We touch on Eurovision fame, "Covid Nose" (and the worst time for your smell to return), another Marmite/Bagel combo, Redknapp baby News and a hypothetical relationship with a model.

As usual, we've got a Wife's Whinge & a Husband's Hump... And Simon introduces a brand new way to end the pod. Will it catch on? Who knows?!

And in our RECOMMENDATIONS bit, Simon recommended a great playlist if you ever need background music. It's called Wine Bar - Afternoon Playlist and can be found on Spotify HERE - https://spoti.fi/2TyEoAj - Or, if you have Apple Music, you can get Simon's similar (but bigger) version HERE - https://apple.co/3wG35Jg

If you'd like to tell us about one (or many) of your marital disputes, email husbandandwifepod@gmail.com and we'll sort them out on the show. Same email address for any communication, feedback or sponsorships (wink wink)

Thanks for listening. At time of writing we're still married.

Support this show http://supporter.acast.com/husband-wife-sentenced-to-life.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Episode 6 of Husband & Wife Sentenced to Life is packed to the rafters...

We may be accidentally sending out messages that we're swingers (we're not).

• Tales of teenage stupidity.

• Hitting rules in the 70s.

• Simon's new, happiness vibe.

• Password hell.

• Top 10 reasons for getting dumped.

• Garden lethargy.

• A serious bathroom breach.

• Lorra's commando experience.

• A facial compliment.

And in our RECOMMENDATIONS bit, Simon re-recommended a great playlist if you ever need background music. It's called Wine Bar - Afternoon Playlist and can be found on Spotify HERE... Or, if you have Apple Music, you can get Simon's similar (but bigger) version HERE - https://apple.co/3yOpqWW

And there was a recommendation for the latest Guy Richie/Jason Statham flick, 'Wrath of Man'. Watch the very shooty-shooty trailer HERE - https://bit.ly/3pc80iu

If you'd like to tell us about one (or many) of your marital disputes, email husbandandwifepod@gmail.com or leave us a Whatsapp voice note on +971502288297 (give us as much info as possible) and we'll sort them out on the show. Same email address for any communication, feedback or sponsorships (wink wink)

Thanks for listening. At time of writing we're still married.

Support this show http://supporter.acast.com/husband-wife-sentenced-to-life.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Episode 7 of #HAWSTL is a real rollercoaster ride, beginning and ending in actual tears.. We talk...

• The last day of school ever.

• Pub lunatics... Dubai vs the UK.

• A 'clicking' Wife's Whinge.

• A 'hairy' Husband's Hump.

• A filthy, fatherly Would You Rather?

• Our brand new feature... Readers' Wives... And Husbands.

• A great film recommendation.

• A lovely, honest compliment.

We're starting to get some great emails from you about marital humps & relationship whinges... But we want more. You can email husbandandwifepod@gmail.com or leave us a voice message on our Whatsapp number for free on +971502288297 - We really want your voice on our pods!

Thanks for listening. At time of writing we're still married.

Support this show http://supporter.acast.com/husband-wife-sentenced-to-life.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

On episode 8 of 'Husband & Wife Sentenced to Life', Lorra went for the jugular on Wife's Whinge, with an issue that will have most women screaming "YES SISTER!" out loud. We also dissected...

• Making Deals with the Tooth Fairy.

• A false teeth claim to fame.

• A 'Lady Boxing' license-to-perv blag.

• Simon's massage paradox.

• Husbands and their assumptions.

• An accusation about Lorra being filthy.

• A "bedroom fun" 'Would You Rather?'

• An email about TikTok toileting.

• Lorra's album recommendations.

• A half-hearted compliment.

As ever, we'd love to hear from you about your relationships... Issues, whinges, gripes, humps... Whatever! Contact us directly via email: husbandandwifepod@gmail.com or Whatsapp us for free on +971 50 22 88 297.

Thanks for listening. At time of recording, we're still married.

Support this show http://supporter.acast.com/husband-wife-sentenced-to-life.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Episode 009 of 'Husband & Wife Sentenced to Life' was recorded less than 24 hours after our second Pfizer vaccine shots.

Today we talked about...

Yesterday's day from hell.

The Relationship Card.

Unusual sweat.

Graduation.

Strong & pretty gross Pfizer side effects.

Lorra's "Wife's Whinge" about tea.

Simon's "Husband's Hump" about an infuriating phone habit Lorra has.

A very deep "Would You Rather?" about mind-reading.

A listener voicemail about air conditioning.

And a two-way compliment.

Recommendations for this week all came from Apple TV+, including 'Ted Lasso', 'Trying' and '1971 The Year That Music Changed'. All fabulous.

We're starting to put podcast questions/votes on our Instagram accounts, so, if you'd like to follow us, you can... Here...

Simon - http://instagram.com/catboy92

Lorra - http://instagram.com/lorranotlaura

As ever, we'd love to hear from you about your relationships... Issues, whinges, gripes, humps... Whatever! Contact us directly via email: husbandandwifepod@gmail.com or Whatsapp us for free on +971 50 22 88 297.

Thanks for listening. At time of recording, we're still married.

Support this show http://supporter.acast.com/husband-wife-sentenced-to-life.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

We made it to double figures! And episode 10 of 'Husband & Wife Sentenced to Life' (#HAWSTL) is pack to the rafters! We talk about:

• Podcasters replacing friends.

• Feedback on accidental texts, jab reactions & sexy-time duration.

• When is Middle-Aged Midnight and the text cut-off?

• The difference between day-crisps & evening-crisps.

• Crisp/dip protocol.

• A 'Wife's Whinge' about hiding food.

• A 'Husband's Hump' about double false hope.

• A 'Would You Rather?' between the bedroom and banter.

• An email from a wife upset about her husband's Euro 2020 behaviour.

• A big compliment and a bedroom compliment.

Our recommendations today are Lin Manuel Miranda's 'In the Heights' & Mads Mikkelsen's 'Riders of Justice'.

Lorra's Dip Recipes:

1 Sour cream & cream cheese (mixed) topped with salsa & grated cheese.

2 Cream cheese & sour cream

Both yummo on the tummo!

We're starting to put podcast questions/votes on our Instagram accounts, so, if you'd like to follow us, you can... Here...

Simon - http://instagram.com/catboy92

Lorra - http://instagram.com/lorranotlaura

As ever, we'd love to hear from you about your relationships... Issues, whinges, gripes, humps... Whatever! Contact us directly via email: husbandandwifepod@gmail.com or Whatsapp us for free on +971502288297

Thanks for listening. At time of recording, we're still married.

Support this show http://supporter.acast.com/husband-wife-sentenced-to-life.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Episode 11 of 'Husband & Wife Sentenced to Life' is, once again, overflowing with marital discord and tales of trying to get by. Today we talk about...

• Just how international our podcast is.

• Listener feedback on mind-reading, evening crisps and middle-aged midnight.

• Lorra learns what 'potted dog' is.

• Multiple hospital trips in 24 hours (feat. dodgy French accent).

• Dad's taking bullets and killer instincts.

• Embarrassing teen Covid plasters.

• Our first podcast freebie!!!

• Bin damage.

• A beds or lunchs 'Would You Rather?'

• A listener letter about visiting parents.

• Recommendations for Bo Burnham's 'Inside' & Micky Flanagan 'A Peek Behind the Curtain'.

• A couple of compliments on cars and almost admitting argument responsibility.

• Car wash guilt trip.

We're starting to put podcast questions/votes on our Instagram accounts, so, if you'd like to follow us, you can... Here...

Simon - http://instagram.com/catboy92

Lorra - http://instagram.com/lorranotlaura

As ever, we'd love to hear from you about your relationships... Issues, whinges, gripes, humps... Whatever! Contact us directly via email: husbandandwifepod@gmail.com or Whatsapp us for free on +971502288297

Thanks for listening. At time of recording, we're still married.

Support this show http://supporter.acast.com/husband-wife-sentenced-to-life.

 See acast.com/privacy for privacy and opt-out information.

Support this show http://supporter.acast.com/husband-wife-sentenced-to-life.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Simon tried to get out of recording ep.12 of 'Husband & Wife Sentenced to Life', due to extreme exhaustion but Lorra twisted his arm and it could be the best episode yet! Today we talk about:

• The sexy boob-grab yawn.

• Potted Dog listener feedback.

• Is Yorkshire a foreign language?

• Being the white, middle-aged, talentless Stormzy.

• Exercise/orgasm science.

• 8 signs your marriage is in trouble.

• A Father's Day 'Wife's Whinge'.

• A sticky 'Husband's Hump'.

• A time-travel 'Would You Rather?'

• Things you don't appreciate until you're older.

• An email about a disgusting problem.

• Complimenting a good spread.

This episode's recommendation is Carole King's 'Tapestry'. 50 years old but we've been rediscovering it.

We're starting to put podcast questions/votes on our Instagram accounts, so, if you'd like to follow us, you can... Here...

Simon - http://instagram.com/catboy92

Lorra - http://instagram.com/lorranotlaura

As ever, we'd love to hear from you about your relationships... Issues, whinges, gripes, humps... Whatever! Contact us directly via email: husbandandwifepod@gmail.com or Whatsapp us for free on +971502288297

Thanks for listening. At time of recording, we're still married.

Support this show http://supporter.acast.com/husband-wife-sentenced-to-life.

 See acast.com/privacy for privacy and opt-out information.

Support this show http://supporter.acast.com/husband-wife-sentenced-to-life.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Episode 13... But is it unlucky? We'll after making an appearance at No.25 in the UAE Podcast Charts, we disappeared again, so maybe there's something in it! Today we talked about...

• Secret superstitions.

• Lucky Perfume.

• Father's Day Feedback.

• "Spite-buying".

• Simon's 'Dadzy' leading to an accidentally distasteful moment.

• The results of our knickers survey.

• Parent bedroom rules.

• Wife's Whinge/Husband's Hump synergy.

• Lorra's anti-husband-fondling diatribe.

• Great news for men (like Simon) who can't grow beards.

• Sandwich vs sh*gging... And the invention of a new term.

• An email about men and make-up.

• Compliments for cakes and dress-up.

• Our comedy charts surprise.

We also recommended:

• Joni Mitchell's 'Blue 50', a few demos from 1971 which Joni has released to coincide with the 50th anniversary of her seminal album, Blue.

• Luca, the new Disney/Pixar film that is a great watch for the family.

• Clarson's Farm on Amazon. If you don't mind Jeremy, it's a decent watch.

We're starting to put podcast questions/votes on our Instagram accounts, so, if you'd like to follow us, you can... Here...

Simon - http://instagram.com/catboy92

Lorra - http://instagram.com/lorranotlaura

As ever, we'd love to hear from you about your relationships... Issues, whinges, gripes, humps... Whatever! Contact us directly via email: husbandandwifepod@gmail.com or Whatsapp us for free on +971502288297

Thanks for listening. At time of recording, we're still married.

Support this show http://supporter.acast.com/husband-wife-sentenced-to-life.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

A pre-listen warning... There's a proper argument in episode 14 of 'Husband & Wife Sentenced to Life'. We also talked about...

• The 'Bed Legs' phenomenon.

• Science... What makes an internet troll?

• Simon admits to trolling an awful car hire firm.

• Lorra has a pop at Simon's Tweets.

• Chrissy Teigen schadenfreude.

• A survey about partner time.

• Lorra's travel-ban rant.

• Signs of the (allegedly fictional) male menopause.

• A proper bag barney on 'Wife's Whinge'.

• A 'Husband's Hump' about eyebrow abuse.

• A 'Would You Rather?' regarding sleazy politicians.

• An email about couples slagging each other off in public.

• A footy compliment.

• More chart news.

Our recommendation this episode is Boomerang Fu... A game on the Nintendo Switch for all the family but a small caveat... It will bring out the worst bad language your kids have ever heard!

We're starting to put podcast questions/votes on our Instagram accounts, so, if you'd like to follow us, you can... Here...

Simon - http://instagram.com/catboy92

Lorra - http://instagram.com/lorranotlaura

As ever, we'd love to hear from you about your relationships... Issues, whinges, gripes, humps... Whatever! Contact us directly via email: husbandandwifepod@gmail.com

Thanks for listening. At time of recording, we're still married.

Support this show http://supporter.acast.com/husband-wife-sentenced-to-life.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Episode 15 almost didn't happen because we were mid-birthday party for our youngest, Betsy Pearl. But, like the troopers that we are, we walked the fifteen paces to the studio and talked for a whole 30mins. Legends! And here's what we talked about...

• Our current Chart position (26th).

• Can mums have a G&T at their kid's party?

• Matt Hancock Video Apologist.

• What TV habits put us off someone.

• Simon's "art".

• The Women who buy it.

• Lorra's Parosmia.

• Dissing Chronotherapy.

• Simon's alleged fisting habit.

• Lorra's flavoured water hypocrisy.

• Gender-neutral toilets.

• Breadmaker machines.

• More from Clarkson's Farm, including an impression.

• Ed Sheeran's bad habits.

We're starting to put podcast questions/votes on our Instagram accounts, so, if you'd like to follow us, you can... Here...

Simon - http://instagram.com/catboy92

Lorra - http://instagram.com/lorranotlaura

As ever, we'd love to hear from you about your relationships... Issues, whinges, gripes, humps... Whatever! Contact us directly via email: husbandandwifepod@gmail.com

Thanks for listening. At time of recording, we're still married. 

Support this show http://supporter.acast.com/husband-wife-sentenced-to-life.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

For her birthday, our 9yr old daughter wanted to take her Spanish boyfriend for a romantic, Italian meal, which we were about to head out for, so we didn't have a heck of a lot of time... But managed to just about squeeze an episode out. Here's what we talked about...

• Hating the word 'staycation'.

• Our 9yr old's romantic date.

• 10 things you shouldn't wear on a date.

• Scary sunglasses science.

• Hospital visits and kooky doctors.

• A clothes pile Wife's Whinge.

• A fringe-terrorist Husband's Hump.

• Home hairdressing.

• A burnt toast Would You Rather.

• An email about sneaky boob glancing.

• Lorra's ogle radar.

• Some new kids' films recommendations.

We're starting to put podcast questions/votes on our Instagram accounts, so, if you'd like to follow us, you can... Here...

Simon - http://instagram.com/catboy92

Lorra - http://instagram.com/lorranotlaura

As ever, we'd love to hear from you about your relationships... Issues, whinges, gripes, humps... Whatever! Contact us directly via email: husbandandwifepod@gmail.com

Thanks for listening. At time of recording, we're still married. 

Support this show http://supporter.acast.com/husband-wife-sentenced-to-life.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

We're on a "staycation" (vomit) this weekend, so this podcast was recorded a little bit early. And for episode 17 of #HAWSTL,w e talked about...

• The approaching Denmark vs England game.

• Avoiding being an "It's Coming Home" guy.

• Sitting down to wee,

• Packing being one of the worst jobs.

• The benefits of living in a holiday destination.

• Purchases that cause arguments and break-ups.

• A 'Wife's Whinge' about stupid-buying.

•A 'Husband's Hump' about gross, lady-body job help.

• A teeth vs sofa 'Would You Rather?'

• A disgruntled housewife email.

• Some cheap recommendations.

• Compliments on packing and a hair-do.

We're starting to put podcast questions/votes on our Instagram accounts, so, if you'd like to follow us, you can... Here...

Simon - http://instagram.com/catboy92

Lorra - http://instagram.com/lorranotlaura

As ever, we'd love to hear from you about your relationships... Issues, whinges, gripes, humps... Whatever! Contact us directly via email: husbandandwifepod@gmail.com

Thanks for listening. At time of recording, we're still married. 

Support this show http://supporter.acast.com/husband-wife-sentenced-to-life.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

A bit of a gap since our last pod but we've squeezed plenty into episode 18 of #HAWSTL (Husband & Wife Sentenced to Life), including...

• Surprise rain.

• A working weekend at a posh hotel.

• Crazy bed making.

• Lorra's far-too-detailed toilet story.

• A 'Wife's Whinge' about Lamp forgetfulness.

• A 'Husband's Hump' about rude face surveying.

• A 'Would You Rather?' about being supportive vs being honest.

• A listener's (Russell) relationship fashion fight.

• Recommendations of 'The Sparks Brothers' & more moorish Mads Mikkelsen movies.

We're starting to put podcast questions/votes on our Instagram accounts, so, if you'd like to follow us, you can... Here...

Simon - http://instagram.com/catboy92

Lorra - http://instagram.com/lorranotlaura

As ever, we'd love to hear from you about your relationships... Issues, whinges, gripes, humps... Whatever! Contact us directly via email: husbandandwifepod@gmail.com

Thanks for listening. At time of recording, we're still married. 

Support this show http://supporter.acast.com/husband-wife-sentenced-to-life.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

We're back with another bumper podcast episode of #HAWSTL (Husband & Wife Sentenced to Life). We tried to record one at the weekend but SOMEONE had a strop! Instead, today we talk about...

• Back to work blues.

• The politics of making-up.

• Games with the kids.

• Olympics spoilers.

• Expo crisp news.

• Covid brain science.

• What Millennials think makes someone old.

• A 'Wife's Whinge' about the toilet flush.

• A 'Husband's Hump' regarding board game 'bantz'.

• A 'Would You Rather?' about stuff vs experiences.

We also recommended an Aussie film called 'Babyteeth', starring the fantastic Ben Mendelsohn and new AppleTV+ musical comedy romp, 'Schmigadoon'.

If you'd like to follow us, you can... Here...

Simon - http://instagram.com/catboy92

Lorra - http://instagram.com/lorranotlaura

As ever, we'd love to hear from you about your relationships... Issues, whinges, gripes, humps... Whatever! Contact us directly via email: husbandandwifepod@gmail.com

Thanks for listening. At time of recording, we're still married. 

Support this show http://supporter.acast.com/husband-wife-sentenced-to-life.

Support this show http://supporter.acast.com/husband-wife-sentenced-to-life.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

We're back! And it's ep20 of #HAWSTL (Husband & Wife Sentenced to Life). So much going on in this one and it gets more emotional than we ever have before. We talk about:

• Lorra finally extacting Simon's 'Clarksons'.

• The difficulties of dieting.

• The varieties of middle-aged w****rs.

• Solitary exercising.

• Northern accents dying out.

• Whether lab-meat is veggie or not.

• The UAE getting Amber status.

• A 'Wife's Re-Whinge' that faced a strong rebuttal.

• 'Husband's Humps' about Lorra's new 'scent' and people who are late.

• A 'fall orr fart' Would You Rather?

• Lorra's Euros blast anecdote.

• Extremely emotional compliments.

We also recommended:

• Chris Packham - The Walk That Made Me

• Yacht Rock Essentials playlist on Apple Music.

• Simon Armitage's 'The Poet Laureate has Gone To His Shed' podcast on BBC Sounds.

• 'Jungle Cruise' - A Decent family movie.

If you'd like to follow us, you can... Here...

Simon - http://instagram.com/catboy92

Lorra - http://instagram.com/lorranotlaura

As ever, we'd love to hear from you about your relationships... Issues, whinges, gripes, humps... Whatever! Contact us directly via email: husbandandwifepod@gmail.com

Thanks for listening. At time of recording, we're still married. 

Support this show http://supporter.acast.com/husband-wife-sentenced-to-life.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Episode 21 of #HAWSTL (Husband and Wife Sentenced to Life) stumbles around subjects like a legless uncle at a wedding. We chat about:

• Forest fruits green tea.

• A bizarre car smell.

• High-achieving kids who are rubbish at home.

• Booking the dreaded trip to the UK.

• Father-in-law similarities.

• Holidays ruining health plans.

• The TV theme that made Lorra cry this week.

• What we want for Leo as he starts university abroad.

• #INSTAGATE

• A blue-tick Wife's Whinge.

• An open-plan Husband's Hump.

• A nut-scratching discussion.

• Would You Rather (have bad breath or B.O.?)

• A new feature about favourites (TV & places today).

We also recommended:

• "How to with John Wilson. Trailer: https://bit.ly/3gcbAWH

• Baptiste (Great TV detective show, which started on the tv show 'The Missing').

If you'd like to follow us, you can... Here...

Simon - http://instagram.com/catboy92

Lorra - http://instagram.com/lorranotlaura

As ever, we'd love to hear from you about your relationships... Issues, whinges, gripes, humps... Whatever! Contact us directly via email: husbandandwifepod@gmail.com

Thanks for listening. At time of recording, we're still married. 

Support this show http://supporter.acast.com/husband-wife-sentenced-to-life.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

A bonus episode of sorts... As we'll be spending a month out of the country, we've invested in some field mics to record wirelessly and wherever we are. So, we gave them a go in the car (quite noisy) and had a bit of an unscripted chat. We talked about:

• Travel plans.

• The possibility of Lorra crying again on the pod.

• An absolutely gross fingernail story.

• Bathroom quietness in teen relationships.

• A starstruck gynaecologist.

• Hospital small-talk near genitals.

• Jock-itch research.

• A smells recap and explaining 'bouquet' to Lorra.

• Some anniversary chat.

• Favourite choccie bars.

Hope the car noises aren't too annoying. If you'd like to follow us, you can... Here...

Simon - http://instagram.com/catboy92

Lorra - http://instagram.com/lorranotlaura

As ever, we'd love to hear from you about your relationships... Issues, whinges, gripes, humps... Whatever! Contact us directly via email: husbandandwifepod@gmail.com

Thanks for listening. At time of recording, we're still married. 

Support this show http://supporter.acast.com/husband-wife-sentenced-to-life.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Hello! A brand new episode of #HAWSTL (Husband & Wife Sentenced to Life) and we cut straight to the chase with an argument straight after the jingle about who should start the podcast! We also delve into...

• A very interesting space fact.

• Lorra's hypothetical space disaster.

• Anniversary gift politics.

• Guilt about leaving the kids for the night.

• Hotel shenanigans.

• Lorra and THAT dress (The real PINGdemic).

• The best veggie burger of all time.

• Following the sitcom 'anniversary nookie' rule.

• Other nights when 'bedroom olympics' is law.

• A 'Wife's Whinge' about s****y supermarket apps.

• A 'Husband's Hump' about everything wrong with posh hotels.

• What's our FAVOURITE takeaway?

• The science of which foods shorten your lifespan.

And we recommended...

The Green Knight

Trailer: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sS6ksY8xWCY

Annette

Trailer: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=l_EaNpL16SU

Sparks - "So May We Start" (Annette opener): https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YWb3KpvAz8s

Phoebe Bridgers - Kyoto (acoustic): https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JLpUzkgiaGI

If you'd like to follow us, you can... Here...

Simon - http://instagram.com/catboy92

Lorra - http://instagram.com/lorranotlaura

As ever, we'd love to hear from you about your relationships... Issues, whinges, gripes, humps... Whatever! Contact us directly via email: husbandandwifepod@gmail.com

Thanks for listening. At time of recording, we're still married. 

Support this show http://supporter.acast.com/husband-wife-sentenced-to-life.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Another slice of married life for ep.24 of #HAWSTL (Husband & Wife Sentenced to Life), talking about...

• Excitement about 'The Crown'.

• Naughty Dominic West's range.

• Holidays to suit your star sign.

• Pulling apart Nostradamus.

• The wet toilet roll mystery.

• A 'Wife's Whinge' regarding mobiles at the dinner table.

• A 'Husband's Hump' about nature.

• A 'Would You Rather?' about how to digest TV.

• 'Favourites'... Thing to put on your feet.

• A brief but revealing chat about open relationships.

We also recommended the excellent Netflix show, 'The Sinner'. We're only halfway through series 2 but we're gripped.

If you'd like to follow us, you can... Here...

Simon - http://instagram.com/catboy92

Lorra - http://instagram.com/lorranotlaura

As ever, we'd love to hear from you about your relationships... Issues, whinges, gripes, humps... Whatever! Contact us directly via email: husbandandwifepod@gmail.com

Thanks for listening. At time of recording, we're still married. 

Support this show http://supporter.acast.com/husband-wife-sentenced-to-life.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

After at least 7 attempts, botched recordings, faulty microphones, forgetting to press record and lots of other faffing-about, we FINALLY managed to record episode 025 of #HAWSTL (Husband & Wife Sentenced to Life) and you may notice it sounds a little different, because we've gone international and we're recording 'on the road' with our Rode Wireless Go II mics. Today we talked about...

• Our garden location.

• Leaving one of our children in Dubai.

• The velocity and ferocity of a Mum-wee.

• Taxi nerves.

• Check-in queues and folder compliments.

• An expert description of our plane.

• The family from hell in front of us.

• Seat-reclining rules.

• Simon's willpower flight trick and Lorra's turbulent outburst.

• Inventing the word "fartophonic".

• Customs fun and the Day 2 PCR test experience.

• Getting the new motorway vibes from Lorra's dad.

• A Betsy Pearl podcast cameo.

• A very unusual bath-time.

• The return of CHIP ADVISOR.

We tried to keep this episode under half an hour and will be doing regular "commuter content" updates as we face the challenges of isolation, the trauma of leaving a kid at university for the first time and whatever else we experience along the way. Please do check out our photos from our trip either HERE or HERE.

If you'd like to follow us, you can... Here...

Simon - http://instagram.com/catboy92

Lorra - http://instagram.com/lorranotlaura

As ever, we'd love to hear from you about your relationships... Issues, whinges, gripes, humps... Whatever! Contact us directly via email: husbandandwifepod@gmail.com

Thanks for listening. At time of recording, we're still married. 

Support this show http://supporter.acast.com/husband-wife-sentenced-to-life.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Hello you! We're back for Day 1 of our Isolation Diaries, bunkered down in Calshot. Today we talked about...

• Day number confusion.

• Garden gnome face tan.

• Dubai body clock.

• Unavoidable morning family noise.

• Father-in-Law coffee machine envy.

• The perfect British Summer day.

• The miracle of keeping a 9yr old off an iPad.

• Double doggy doo-doo dilemma.

• **ARGUMENT ALERT** (regarding SIM card bitterness).

• Another batch of PCR test results.

• Barbecues & rhubarb crumble.

• Simon's 'double hump' (Post-travel farting & locating loo rolls).

• Missing the silver bum gun.

• A fruit or veg 'Would You Rather?'

• Loving Lorra's local stories.

• A 'Favourites' about Calshot.

We're posting Isolation Diaries photos, videos and stories HERE, so feel free to take a look, leave comments and ask questions, especially if you're due to travel.

See you tomorrow... Hopefully! x

Support this show http://supporter.acast.com/husband-wife-sentenced-to-life.

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Episode 27 and Day 2 of our Isolation Diaries, as we await the mystical Day 5 nose-poke and freedom. In the meantime, from a garden beside the Solent estuary, we talked about...

• The remarkable English weather.

• Being morning ninjas.

• Anglo Saxon homework & England's premiere bull****ter.

• Lorra's booking spree.

• Simon's "spite-buy" vinyl spree.

• Another manky "cactus" bath.

• Isolation titillation via the NHS Track & Trace calls.

• Scrabble first-timers.

• Double car hire shenanigans.

• Air show disaster.

• Eggs & not needing a cock.

• Teenage bedroom awkwardness.

• Gigantic arachnid invasion.

• No humps and zero arguments.

• A 'Would You Rather?' about old friends.

We'll be back (weather permitting) from the garden with another Isolation Diary tomorrow. As usual, keep up to date with our visuals on Simon's Instagram... http://instagram.com/catboy92

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Day 3 of government-imposed lockdown was a beauty. On today's Isolation Diaries, we talk:

• "Studio" issues due to sea mist.

• A brief synopsis of "The Fog".

• Outstanding British weather (which we didn't pack for).

• Another day of no arguments.

• The trees around us.

• Conkers & Sycamore helicopters.

• Explaining the conker scoring system.

• Loo roll shortages.

• More Scrabble.

• Lorra back on the booze.

• Should we be flushing our wee in the eco-house.

• The spider vs wasp battle royale.

• Sunday roast feat. veggie chorizo stuffing.

• Jaffa cheesecake.

• Isolation fun & memories.

• 'Would You Rather?' - Paneer vs veggie chicken in curries.

• Listener feedback on how you got your conkers hard.

We also recommend Mortimer & Whitehouse Gone Fishing Series 3, which we watched 2 episodes of last night. Fantastic, comfy, cuddly telly.

We'll be back tomorrow. Don't forget to check out our photo and video updates at http://instagram.com/catboy92

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Back in the garden, a glass of water for Simon, a rhubarb G&T for Lorra and we're away on another isolation podcast (although we had been out... Legally... More on that tomorrow). Today we talk about...

• The daily unbelievable weather report.

• Life admin, incl. an emotional SIM card & a bank fail.

• Becoming a porn-controlling dad.

• Simon's second Amazon delivery... The "Spite Buy".

• Peregrine Falcon spotting.

• Look & Read school days chat.

• A marriage conker battle.

• Leo's bike-helmet 'dickheadery'.

• Simon's learning to ride a bike parable.

• Leo's curry fail.

• Arguing and cabin fever.

• A quick weight update.

• 'Would You Rather?' - Pebble beach or sand beach?

• 'Favourites' - Sandwiches.

In the sandwich chat, Simon recommended 'Hot Pepper Jelly' in Crouch End. From what we can see, it may now be closed but here's their Insta, if you want to check them out... https://www.instagram.com/hotpepperjellycafe/ and the sandwich (or at least the way we make it) is slightly toasted bread, peanut butter, crispy veggie bacon, lettuce & hot pepper jam. It's delicious!

Don't forget to check out our isolation pics and videos here: http://instagram.com/catboy92

See you next time x

Support this show http://supporter.acast.com/husband-wife-sentenced-to-life.

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We got the negative TTR results last night, so we went for a sunrise walk through Calshot, down to Calshot Spit, along the beach and the huts, back along the Solent Estuary, alongside Fawley Power Station and back, through the wild bushes, trees and nature, to home. We've left as much as the recording in as possible, so you can hopefully feel the ambiance around us. Don't forget to check-out the photos that accompany this walk here: http://instagram.com/catboy92

Today we talked about:

• Being outside for the first time.

• Bus memories.

• The daily unbelievable weather update.

• Lorra's snogging woods.

• TTR tests and Lorra's mum's driving.

• The first sea view and the Bluebird Cafe.

• Beach huts and beach sounds.

• Chris Packham stalking pt.1.

• A mother-in-law/wife mix-up at the drive-thru test place.

• Bumping into a dog-walker.

• Chris Packham stalking pt.2.

• Simon's 3rd Amazon delivery.

• A tri-generational water fight.

• Leo's hummus and halloumi dish.

• Getting the TTR results in record time.

• Power station chat.

• Lorra's forest weeing.

• Betsy Pearl's foraging.

• Lorra's innuendo chastisement.

• Virtual pub quizzing.

• Rambling chat.

Hope you enjoy this one. It was really lovely to record. A beautiful walk. Tremendous weather. Stunning views. And a nice start to FREEDOM! Don't forget to check-out the photos that accompany this walk here: http://instagram.com/catboy92

Support this show http://supporter.acast.com/husband-wife-sentenced-to-life.

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Today we move on to The Hampshire Diaries segment of our trip. Yesterday was 'freedom day' and we managed to get out and about. Today we talked about...

• Strimmer wars.

• Simon & Queen Victoria comparisons.

• The poo-truck cometh.

• Lorra's meticulous beach packing.

• Beachgoers & wild swimmers.

• Our kids in the English Channel.

• Who from our family were beach fidgeters.

• Childhood cafe memories ruined.

• Leo's bathroom issue.

• Betsy Pearl's ghostly walk to Luttrell's Tower.

• Getting called out by a premier league bulls***ter.

• Rain stopping play at a family barbecue.

• Leo becoming Johnny Free Coats.

• A 3,500 mile teacher/student conference.

• We had a whisper-argument.

As usual, lots of photos, videos and stories from our trip here: http://instagram.com/catboy92

See you next time!

Support this show http://supporter.acast.com/husband-wife-sentenced-to-life.

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We sound unusual today because we recorded our usual morning 3km walk around Calshot, the Solent & Southampton Water but Simon, like a pillock, deleted the recording. So, we popped into the conservatory at Dennis & Gaye's and recorded a quick, unedited recap. We talked about...

• The botched recording.

• Hythe, the little pier train and the ferry.

• Hire car foreplay.

• A boring pre-university Ikea visit.

• Lorra's alter-ego... CHIP ADVISOR!

• The Mayflower Theatre.

• Simon's first reaction to 'Blood Brothers'.

Check out Hythe Pier here: http://www.savehythepier.org.uk/

Check out Chip Advisor and all our pics/videos here: http://instagram.com/catboy92

Don't forget to let us know your recommendations for CHIP ADVISOR to check out in the Hampshire/New Forest region.

Gotta dash. Off for our Day 8 PCR Tests. Last of the 4,000 dirham batch! Obviously we'll need more before heading back to Dubai.

See you next time! x

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A quick, unedited chat this morning, as we're heading out to Windsor Castle shortly and Foreplay-Hire-Car departure time is soon. Today we talked about...

• Lorra's Dad correcting our water mistakes.

• Where we were for 9/11.

• Day 8 Covid tests.

• First stop at Asda (with a brooding teenager).

• Leo (Daftus Brushus) having his first ever UK day out alone.

• How much money Lorra gave him to finance this walk around town.

• Car park Quorning.

• New Forest Wildlife Park (and Familus Chavus).

• Popping to Lyndhurst with Chip Advisor.

• Our favourite cafe in the world.

• Overpriced vinyl.

• Poorly BP.

• Lorra's dogging Google.

• The King's Copse rope swing.

• Collecting Leo in his tattooed-on freebie jacket.

• Losing last night's quiz on the tie breaker.

Sorry it's raw and rushed today but royalty beckons!

See you next time x

Support this show http://supporter.acast.com/husband-wife-sentenced-to-life.

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Another rapidly-recorded and 100% unedited pod this morning, from a quick walk down to the beach and back. It was 9ºc this morning, it's been around 17ºc every other morning. Today we talked about:

• The weather, obviously.

• The Windsor parking odyssey.

• Windsor Castle.

• St George's Chapel and too much history.

• The 9/11 memorial and getting on the telly.

• The State Rooms & Prince Phillip Exhibition.

• Painting and hobnobbing in the East Garden.

• A £150 walk around Windsor.

• Chip Advisor at The Hare & Hounds in Sway.

• A Mother-in-Law porn mine.

Off to see how much vinyl Simon can find at the Car Boot sale near Brockenhurst.

See you next time x

Support this show http://supporter.acast.com/husband-wife-sentenced-to-life.

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On this morning's chilly (12ºc) Calshot loop, we talked about:

• The possibility of the UAE changing the weekend.

• Getting to do a Simon 'thing'... The car boot sale.

• Missing out on almost-definitely-stolen-but-cheap bikes.

• More hire car/sex metaphors.

• Teaching Betsy Pearl the art of haggling.

• Betsy Pearl being an abductor's dream come true.

• Leo's pretentious student purchases.

• Simon's vinyl bonanza.

• Purchase of the day... The Thunderbird 2.

• The Middle of Lidl.

• Extended family meet-ups.

• Showing-off about Dubai's snow.

• Watching the rubbish NTAs.

• Simon & Leo's VW Transporter fantasy.

• Simon's inflatable catamaran canoe fantasy.

Lots of photos talked about today. See them all here: http://instagram.com/catboy92

The inflatable catamaran kayak thing Simon was talking about is actually called a Kayacat and can be found here (should anyone wish to gift him one ahead of his 50th birthday): https://kayacat.com/

See you next time! x

Support this show http://supporter.acast.com/husband-wife-sentenced-to-life.

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Hello you! We recorded today's pod sat in the car at Calshot Beach in the rain, which is expected to last all day. And we talked about:

• Our view.

• The weather (obviously).

• The new hire car and it's futuristic holes.

• Heading into Southampton City Centre.

• Our review of the Costa vegan bacon butty.

• Lorra's Primark wormhole.

• Simon's views on the ugliness of England's city centres.

• Marks & Sparks sparkly festive booze.

• Leo's expensive phone fix.

• Our Lymington fly-by.

• An exciting Barry Manilow charity find.

• Strolling around Beaulieu.

• Simon's E-Type Jaguar anecdote.

• A 5km dog walk through Badminston Common.

• Our feedback on your feedback.

Remember, we do love your feedback...

Simon Insta: http://instagram.com/catboy92

Lorra Insta: http://instagram.com/lorranotlaura

Email us: husbandandwifepod@gmail.com

Simon Twitter: http://twitter.com/catboy92

Lorra Twitter: http://twitter.com/lorranotlaura

See you next time x

Support this show http://supporter.acast.com/husband-wife-sentenced-to-life.

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Hello! Hope you're fit & well. We're just back from our morning walk and recording session, which we missed terribly yesterday, due to the inclement weather. That said, the 100% rain forecast for the day didn't happen and we managed to fit quite a bit in. Today we talk about:

• Longdown Activity Farm.

• Lorra's pygmy goat fantasy.

• Robin's Nest Antiques Emporium sans haggling.

• North/South Halfords pronunciation discrepancy.

• The Happy Cheese review & a Chip Advisor world record.

• An evening with the relatives.

• Finding out the genesis of Lorra's Mum's BS stories.

• A lovely, dark drive home.

• The day ahead.

• Our feelings as we approach the end of Hampshire Diaries.

Check out Longdown Activity Farm here: https://longdownfarm.co.uk/

Check out Robin's Nest Emporium here: https://www.robinsnestemporium.co.uk/

Check out The Happy Cheese Pub here: https://www.happycheeseashurst.co.uk/

See you next time x

Support this show http://supporter.acast.com/husband-wife-sentenced-to-life.

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What a beautiful walk this morning, to accompany our recording. Blue skies, a thick fog hanging on the mouth of the river and the Solent, the Isle of Wight Ferry's foghorn blaring away... Loved every second of it. And today we talked about...

• Our final full day in Hampshire and packing.

• Walking with alpacas.

• Awful GPS & wild horses.

• Acres Down Farm & cream teas.

• A walk with a view.

• Morrisons, aloohol-free Guinness & even more gin.

• Blackberry-picking.

• The best & worst curry.

So, our last full day in Hampshire. No plans as yet (other than more packing... God knows how we're going to get it all in the car). As usual, all the things & places we're talking about are accompanied on Instagram and Insta-Stories here: http://instagram.com/catboy92

Petlake Alpaca Farm: https://www.petlakealpacas.co.uk/

Acres Down Farm & Tea Rooms: http://www.acresdownfarm.co.uk/

Alam Spice Takeaway: https://www.alamspice.co.uk/

See you next time x

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Emotional morning. After a couple of weeks, flights, swabs, tests, results, isolation and everything else, this morning was our last time around 'The Calshot Lap'. It was a crisp but sunny 10ºc (Simon even wore a long-sleeved top - Shock horror!)

Today we talked about...

• Betsy Pearl's "appendicitis".

• One last Mother-in-Law BS story.

• Packing.

• A gorgeous trip up and down the River Stour.

• A walk around Christchurch and revisiting the wishing well.

• Chip Advising at The Old Mill Tea Room.

• Hengistbury to Mudeford Spit.

• A long drive home via Lymington.

• The homeliness of BBC Radio 2.

• A final evening walk.

• Some thank yous.

The boats we hired in Christchurch: http://www.willowwaymarina.co.uk/boat-hire.html

The land-train we went on: https://bit.ly/3nE3FG7

Today we're heading off West, to Bristol, with a safari stop-off on the way. We're scared, pensive, excited, nervous and more about this next part of the trip, as books will close, new chapters will begin and goodbyes are forthcoming. We'll let you know how it goes.

See you next time x

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Good Morning! And it is a good morning, as we got to try out a new walk from our Gloucestershire cottage today. And we talked about...

• The country morning ambience.

• Leaving Calshot & Hampshire.

• Longleat Safari Park.

• Getting attacked by monkeys & deer.

• Bath traffic woes.

• A massive steaming pile of manure.

• Lorra's emotions and the bins.

• Our new cottage.

• Berkeley and nasty local encounters.

• A quality chippy and another world record.

• More hellos and thank yous for your messages.

Longleat Safari Park: https://www.longleat.co.uk/

So, no plans for Gloucestershire & Bristol as yet but Lorra's already got her folders and lists out in the kitchen, so adventures await. We'll be posting lots of photos, instastories, etc, here: http://instagram.com/catboy92

See you next time x

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A bit of a surprising, eye opening day for us yesterday. We talked about...

• Three motorways & traffic.

• Our son's uni residence & parents dropping-off.

• Textbook Bristol introduction.

• Corn Street & St Nicholas Markets.

• Too many people.

• The "students these days" discussion.

• Bristol oversell & subsequent disappointment.

• Leo's first legal drink and getting carded.

• Proper England rain.

• Thornbury fly-by & the Tesco vibrator.

• Saturday night telly and feeling down.

• Late night wildlife encounters.

• Betsy Pearl's all-nighter.

Hopefully (although probably not today!) we'll soon have better Bristol experiences. Do get in touch with your tips.

See you next time.

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Hello you! Hope you're well. We've been out for another chilly, crisp, morning walk. It's rush-hour in the country, so we've seen a couple of cars. Back in the cottage garden, we talked about...

• Teso Plant Chef sossies.

• Cold showers.

• Deriving to Bristol & marathon-dodging.

• Leaving Leo for his first day in his new hometown.

• The Galleries & Cabot Circus.

• Ladies in the men's toilets.

• The Old Market Quarter.

• Betsy Pearl's gay sauna comedy moment.

• The joy of being upstairs on a bus.

• The Christmas Steps & more scantily-clad students.

• Crepes & no patatas bravas at Bristol Harbour.

• A closed city centre.

• Squirrel whispering in Castle Park.

• Leo's Bristol big day out.

• The Arlo Parks red vinyl mystery.

• A closed Thornbury but open Berkeley.

• A fire fail.

Today, Lorra's folks, Gaye & Dennis, are doing a fly-by with Leo's bike and we might pop-up to Jeremy Clarkson's farm, Diddly Squat. Well report back tomorrow.

See you next time x

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Hello. First of all, apologies for the lack of podcast yesterday. We explain all on the podcast. It all got a bit heavy. So, today we talked about...

• The failed podcast.

• Lorra's inability to work out directions.

• Taking Betsy Pearl in our morning walk.

• A visit from Lorra's parents.

• Simon's bridge nerd-out.

• Clifton Suspension Bridge and fear of falling.

• A grim Burger King.

• Watching "Everybody's Talking About Jamie".

• Richard E Grant's bad Sheffield accent.

• Disappointing Asda experience.

• Catching up with Dubai friends.

• Watching new Bake Off & Buzzcocks.

• The insane Fred West coincidence anecdote.

You can watch the Fred West documentary and see the mill we wanted to buy here: https://www.itv.com/hub/fred-and-rose-west-reopened/10a1319

Gotta dash...Today is Uni-Drop-Off Eve (tomorrow we say goodbye to Leo), so we're having a family day out to Cheddar Gorge & Wookie Hole today. Keep the messages and comments coming.

See you next time x

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Hello you! It's D-Day, the D standing for 'Drop-Off'. It's a biggie. It's something we've been building to, stressing about, fearing and dreading. Towards the end of this podcast, Lorra gets very emotional. IF you're going or have gone through the university drop-off, you'll get it. However, we also caught up about yesterday and this lot...

• A Fred West update.

• Heading for a big day out but feeling flat.

• Wookey Hole via Rock of Ages.

• A picnic at Cheddar Gorge.

• A grumpy sweet-shop tosspot.

• Weston Super Mare.

• The grimness of the British seaside.

• Getting 'on the coins'.

• The worst chippy in the world.

• A final FINAL curry with Leo.

• Changing Rooms on telly.

• Lorra starting to get really emotional.

So, this is it. Ground zero. Lift off. A cutting of the apron strings. A red letter day in the diaries of all our lives, Leo most of all. We'll be back soon to talk it through. As usual, keep your messages and comments coming. The are always a pleasure to read.

Simon Insta: http://instagram.com/catboy92

Lorra Insta: http://instagram.com/lorranotlaura

See you next time x

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Hello you! Well, a massive day yesterday. A day that most parents are building up to from the day their babies are born. A day of high emotion, mixed feelings, stress, heartache, pain, sadness, grief... The lot. A slightly longer pod today because there was a lot to talk about. We start with Lorra in tears, as the weight of er first morning with her boy hit home. We also talked about...

• The comfort of Radio 2.

• The default direction for stirring.

• Leo getting up early for once... And his nerves.

• Packing the car.

• An emotionless teen cottage goodbye.

• Bristol and outrageous NCP parking fees.

• A digs fly-by that lead to frustration.

• The Slug & Lettuce and a nerves-poo.

• The first drop-off, moving him in and Leo's room.

• The Tesco/Ikea split.

• Lorra & Leo's Tesco tension.

• Back to the flat & the food drop-off.

• Getting kicked-out by a (once again) emotionless teenager.

• Lorra's feelings as we walked through Bristol.

• The therapy of meeting up with fellow Dubai parents.

• The world's worst busker.

• Letting slip a big secret.

• Bristol at night.

• A dark, spooky drive home.

Again, a very strange feeling as we sit here this morning. We feel sad, a bit flat, a little lost... But as we type this, Betsy Pearl is singing upstairs and, as ever, is bursting with life, so she'll get us through and hopefully we can shake these feelings and emotions and make a go of these last few days.

As ever, thanks for listening and thank you so much for all the support via messages, emails and comments on our social medias.

See you next time x

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Hello you! A very overcast morning in the cottage garden today. Today we talked about...

• Finishing Bob Mortimer's fantastic audiobook.

• Feeling fed up about snarky teens.

• Honey & Mamma Mia in Dubai.

• Everywhere for kids being closed.

• Slightly cheaper Bristol parking.

• A badly-designed bridge for vertigo.

• The shops in Bristol Arcade.

• Arabic fail.

• Extinction Rebellion.

• Christmas Steps and a lot more hills.

• Cabot Tower & Brandon Hill Park.

• More squirrel-whispering.

• Walking along the water and the SS Great Britain.

• Disappointing lunch.

• A flying student visit.

• Singing Manics & a great busker.

• First-hand experience of the petrol shortage crisis.

Heading into Bristol again today. Last Saturday, our first time in Bristol, left us less-than-happy about the place but we've relaxed our opinions since then and we're excited to see if we feel any different today. Find out on tomorrow's podcast... Which will also be the start of our last full day in Bristol and the UK.

See you next time x

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Hello on what is our last full day in the UK. We're both feeling very emotional as several chapters are about to close. Today we talked about...

• Feelings!

• Leo's bike & an awkward drop-off.

• The market and the dungarees.

• Bristol's lack of good Italian restaurants.

• Bristol getting horrible again.

• The brilliant M-Shed & Bristol's history.

• Crepes & people watching.

• Walking through town as it closed.

• Not the Saturday evening we'd hoped for.

• Strictly Come Dancing.

• Not making sweet, sweet lovin' by the fireside.

• Leo's bad news foreplay.

We've tried to be very honest in today's pod and we hope that comes across. Thank you for all your messages of support and comments. It means the world to us. Today is going to be a very, very difficult day. We'll let you know how it went soon.

See you next time x

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Hello you! This is the final installment of our 'Bristol Diaries' podcasts. We've recorded it on Sunday evening, sitting in the garden of our cottage, shortly after getting back here, after saying goodbye to our 'fresher' son, Leo, until at least Christmas. We will be in the car before 8am, heading to Heathrow and, eventually, Dubai, so we won't have time for recording and editing in the morning. We talked about...

• Getting our 'Fit to Fly' tests at Cabot Circus.

• Walking through town, accompanied by city 'characters'.

• Leo's orange hair & nail polish

• Getting to see his room, now he's been in there a weekend.

• Crazy golf getting crazy competitive.

• Brandon Hill Park & Cabot Tower.

• Finding a great veggie Sunday roast.

• The final drop-off & goodbye.

Our crazy golf location: https://piratebayadventuregolf.com/

Where we had the Sunday roast: https://bit.ly/39EyJNT

We'll be back very soon with another catch-up podcast from back in Dubai, no doubt talking about the trip home, how we're feeling, how it is to catch up with Honey, the daughter we left behind(!), as well as our pets, Charlie the Frenchie & Awimbaway the aloof cat. Until then, from the bottom of ourr hearts, a massive thank you for your ears, your hearts, your comments, your tips & your messages of support.

See you next time x

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Hello! Happy International Podcast Day. It'd be rude not to do one, right? Today, from our garden in Dubai, we talked about...

• Being honest about depression.

• Leaving the lovely cottage.

• One last Asda.

• Being useless at doing 'Britain'.

• Shady Skoda Sat-Nav.

• Dad motorway warnings.

• Petrol shortage shenanigans.

• Missing flights.

• People being horrible to Emirates staff.

• Excess baggage pillock.

• Moving-in to Caffe Nero.

• Missing another flight.

• Expensive hotel and pizza decision.

• Late results.

• Hating people in plane queues.

• Pleasant flight, pesky kids.

• Getting home.

• Opening-up more on depression.

Gotta dash! Another school run to do. Thank you for all those lovely messages when we were struggling to get home. It meant a lot.

See you next time x

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Hello you! We recorded today's podcast on a sunn7, blue-skied, 40ºc drive to Parkview Hospital's Covid Drive-Thru, so Simon could get his, erm, fit-to-work test done. Today we talked about...

• The rules of radio.

• Simon's different October hashtag list.

• Lorra's car clock discrepancies.

• Blowvember.

• The launch of Expo 2020 Dubai.

• Our emotionless, problem child.

• A Leo update.

• How to trick him into texting us.

• Lorra's 'Would You Rather?'

• The best & worst things about being back.

• An overly-emotional reply to a boss-text.

• A future 'pod-as-we-cook' idea.

• Some almost-live road rage.

Recommendations:

'Squid Game' trailer: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oqxAJKy0ii4

'Old' trailer: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=A4U2pMRV9_k

Hope the car noises weren't too annoying. We both had our muffs out to quieten the AC in Lorra's car (which sounds like a jet engine in real life).

See you next time x

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Hello you! A quick catch-up as we walked Charlie around the lake behind our villa. It was too hot. We went from normal to drippy during this recording... And not in a good way. Today we talked about...

• Back to work eve.

• An urge to watch the new James Bond.

• Getting back in the kitchen with veggie enchiladas.

• Lorra not liking the word 'poo'... And some worse suggestions.

• Dubai parents' complex pick-up/drop-off schedules.

• Lorra's dread of an empty house tomorrow.

• The travel playlist.

• The bad boy discussion.

• Simon's bad boy percentage.

• Red sky at night. Shepherds or sailors?

Simon's veggie bean enchiladas: https://bit.ly/3orugXj

The travel playlist: https://apple.co/3D2DZYg

About to Zoom the uni-boy!

See you next time! x

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Hello. Second attempt to upload this one as it all disappeared last time. We recorded in our Dubai kitchen as Simon cooked roasted red pepper linguine and Lorrra sat in the Lay-Z-Boy recliner drinking a caramel & hazelnut latte. You can see the finished dish here: https://bit.ly/2ZSqKey

Today we talked about...

• The cyclone heading our way.

• Lorra's hatred of Simon's Insta foodie posts.

• The shock of the early rising.

• Separate school drop-offs.

• Back to work for Simon.

• Lorra's mid-morning snooze mistake.

• One of us broke the phoning-whilst-having-a-poo rule.

• Lorra's pick-up.

• University catch up with Leo.

• Simon's culinary ruse to make Leo homesick.

• Daughter rating Dad as a bad boy!

• A 'Would You Rather?' about cinema vs dinner dating.

• The big blender finish.

Gotta dash. Just back from a 13hr school run (6.30am-7.40pm). and there's telly to watch!

See you next time!

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Hello you! Well, after several misfires and an entire recording we decided to bin, we finally got around to recording an episode. It's been a week. Far too long but, as you'll hear, we having been in a great frame of mind. And, as it World Mental Health Day, we thought it appropriate and important to put this out.

Today we talk about...

• Broken air-conditioning.

• The mental pain of missing our son.

• Free time dilemma.

• Simon talks about depression.

• Renewing Lorra's car. A lovely financial surprise!

• The shag sheet & the chunder chart.

• Expo 2020 Dubai first visit.

• The Red Arrows save Simon a fortune.

• Accidentally labelling oneself a chronophile.

• As much James Bond chat as Lorra could handle.

• Pizza Express's new Paneer Tikka pizza.

• Pizza Express's stupid diet doughnut pizza.

• 5-6pm bedtime.

• Back on to depression, men's mental health and what Simon calls "Working Class Depression".

Sorry if this one is too much of a downer. We're not in a great place at the moment. Again, World Mental Health Day seems the rght time to talk about it. We'll try to be in a better place for the next one. We hope you're doing okay.

See you next time x

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Hello you! Another recording in the car, as we sat in a car park (the Cat Stevens car park) waiting for Kid3 to finish performing arts. Today we talked about...

• Last episode's depression-cast.

• Double broken air-conditioning nightmare.

• Sleeping (or not sleeping) on the floor.

• Toddler tantrums vs moody teens.

• The Squid Game email we got from school.

• Lorra got her nails done... For someone else's birthday!

• What's the male equivalent to women getting their nails done?

• A falling-out and Lorra's ability to hold a grudge FOREVER!

• Sweet, sweet love talk... And mis-timed libido.

• Dubai zebra-crossing dilemma.

Simon recommended Alan Davies' brilliant podcast "Seven Pillars" - https://apple.co/2X5SRpB

Just about to eat a homemade paneer tikka masala curry.

See you next time x

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Hello you! It's Friday morning and, for the first time in months, we're back in our home studio to record ep.55 of #HAWSTL (Husband & Wife Sentenced to Life) and it's a WHOPPER today... What the Beano or Whizzer & Chips used to call a 'bumper edition'!

Today we talked about...

• Riding high in the charts against some of our favourite podcasters.

• Your votes and reviews (Please leave us one!)

• Lorra's bin-recycling laminate.

• Sick kids.

• Driving on "parental daze" auto-pilot.

• The curry-on-rice debate.

• The posh get eating soup wrong.

• Lorra's depression manifesting itself in food and cakes.

• Betsy Pearl's big school news.

• Leo's annoying Zoom behaviour from Uni.

• Amir Khan selfie and cleaning the toilet.

• Simon accidentally mis-aging a very famous online celeb.

• Lorra's bum-spot favour (first thing this morning).

• Reviewing Adele's new single 'Easy on Me'.

• The Fran Healy from Travis headline in today's news.

Recommendations...

Kings of Convenience - Quiet is the New Loud: https://bit.ly/3p18HNP

Only Murders in the Building (trailer): https://bit.ly/3DN9eah

Blush (trailer): https://bit.ly/3AJah9c

We're off to McCafferty's Irish Bar for brunch today, after hearing they do great veggie food. Will be reporting back but you can check them out here: https://bit.ly/30jM90e

Thanks for listening. Gerat to b back in our studio. Keep the messages coming on Insta, Twitter or via our email husbandandwifepod@gmail.com

See you next time x

See you

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Hello you! We popped-in to the spare-room-cum-studio for a quick (although not as quick as Simon would've liked) chat.

Today we talked about...

• The studio temperature.

• The Marks & Sparks poll result.

• The start of Christmas shopping.

• Excessive advent calendars.

• A quick veggie review of a brunch we went to.

• The monster that is post-brunch-Lorra.

• Simon's flies & Michael McIntyre's nut.

• Poorly Honey's Covid test.

• Simon's first radio show from Expo 2020.

• His subsequent dad-brain stupidity.

• Lorra's embarrassment whilst buying a "massager".

Today's recommendation was a documentary called 'Class Action Park'. Check out the trailer here: https://bit.ly/3aIHfft

See you next time! x

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Hello! As you'll hear, Lorra was on the verge of 'erupting' throughout this podcast. It's a more thrilling ride than Die hard III. Today we talked about...

• A dodgy & very late burger delivery.

• Wife's organising what Simon calls "Sex Back-handers'.

• Immodium as foreplay.

• How do we fare on a big list of parenting fails.

• Emails AND videos on good parenting from school.

• Simon's cousin has a baby.

• His text reaction.

• His voice text reaction.

We had to end abruptly for obvious reasons but we'll be back soon.

See you next time x

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Hello you! We're back. From the last pod to now was supposed to have been a very sexy time but it didn't quite work-out like that. It never does, right?

Today we talk about...

• Illness sweeping through the house.

• Poorly women vs poorly men.

• Levels of in-house illness & the signs.

• Garlic & wine armpits.

• A 2am (forced) dad-drive.

• Calling-out 'pretentious tea twonks'.

• The cheesy beans on toast argument.

• Lorra's PS$ 'Overcooked' addiction.

• Discovering 'GeoGuessr' (late to the party).

• Catching up with Leo at Uni in Bristol.

Recommendations...

Simon saw Dune and said it was "Shakespeare meets Star Wars with a phallic sand worm". He thought it was brilliant. Here's the trailer: https://bit.ly/3Ba2PE6

We finished 'Only Murders in the Building'. Fantastic telly. Trailer: https://bit.ly/3pu58jj

We also finished 'Mr. Corman. Joseph Gordon Levitt is amazing. It's trippy. It's clever. We hope he does more. Trailer: https://bit.ly/2Zfnw4Y

Enjoy. See you next time x

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Hello you! On today's episode, we talked about...

• Simon considering recorded some new music for the podcast.

• Simon's Loaded Veggie Sweet Potatoes - Look: https://bit.ly/3EkMdfc

• Poorly kids and a sofa-ruining lateral flow test.

• Halloween preparations.

• Your cheesy-beans-on-toast feedback.

• Opening the Pandora's Box of how much should be spent on Simon's 50th.

Today we recommended...

Greg Davies in 'The Cleaner' (trailer): https://bit.ly/3GoeAKX

The new 'Blankety Blank' (trailer): https://bit.ly/3bgE6n2

See you next time x

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Hello you! Sorry it's been a while. Illness has swept through the family and, as you'll hear, has landed on the worst person possible! Today we talked about...

• Simon (you guessed it!) feeling really poorly.

• Simon out gigging during unsociable hours.

• Looking forward to hosting Christmas Fayres.

• Honey podcasting and setting up a school business.

• Lorra expecting a Christmas Megamix.

• Reminiscing about Fantasy Reboot.

• This year's Christmas adverts (links below).

• Marks & Sparks upping their Christmas game.

• Leo got a job!

• Halloween... Possibly for the last time.

• A new idea... "That'd be good on Gogglebox".

Recommendations:

Stath Lets Flats... Great but silly sitcom

Dear Evan Hansen... Teen suicide musical. Better than it sounds!

Christmas ads (Some we talked about but all we've watched)...

John Lewis: https://bit.ly/3BS7awj

Disney: https://bit.ly/3qd7tzm

Boots: https://bit.ly/3CTpC8T

M&S feat. the Pig: https://bit.ly/3kbNrlj

M&S: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=D_85F9sX134

Very: https://bit.ly/3bOO1AC

Sports Direct: https://bit.ly/2YmbCpn

Asda: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9OoYc1uc9BM

Lidl: https://bit.ly/3k9DS64

Selfridges: https://bit.ly/3q7xkca

TK Maxx: https://bit.ly/3EKSXmy

Argos: https://bit.ly/3BRGOdV

Barbour: https://bit.ly/3o0LJEl

Gap: https://bit.ly/3o0LOI9

See you next time!

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We thought we'd record a few specials on the run-up to Christmas, doing our own versions of some of the podcasts we listen to, love, admire, etc. Today it's Alan Davies' Seven Pillars - Which we highly recommend. Alan is a lovely bloke and a great interviewer. It's also worth checking out his biography (audiobook) 'Just Ignore Him', a very moving account of his childhood life.

Back to today's podcast... Alan asks his guests about seven things in their lives. The subjects are...

• Celluloid (film, scene or line).

• Play (sporting event, concert or live event).

• Place.

• Music.

• Literature.

• Food.

• Memory.

Lorra said we weren't allowed to over-think this or go too pretentious (she often accuses Simon of this). So, we hope you enjoy our suggestions and memories. We threw in a bonus "special" category in there, too.

Please don't forget to like, rate, review, subscribe and tell your friends about our little podcast.

See you next time x

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Hello. We recorded this one a few days ago but it's been full-on and we forgot to upload it.

Today we talked about...

• What each of us brought into the studio.

• Having a bad morning.

• Not the UAE anecdote they were expecting.

• Lorra's haircut.

• Turn-offs.

We're going to try to get a few more pods in before Simon's 50th (Thursday 25th Nov).

See you next time x

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Hello you! Some jingle-jangle Christmas bells throughout this pod. And we got through a lot of stuff...

• Moaning about moaners.

• Doing Christmas early.

• Barber abuse (with naughty voicenote)

• Becoming our fantasy pre-loved upcyclers.

• Pet advent calendars

• Display candles.

• Coffee shop festive flavours.

For Dubai shoppers, here's the market we got the table from: https://www.instagram.com/labrocantedxb

And here's us working on and finishing the table: https://bit.ly/3pbPBTJ

See you next time! x

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Hello again!

Today is Simon's last day in his 40s, last day of the first half century of his life... So a lot of fun today! We talked...

• A strange, early birthday greeting.

• A 100% sleepless nights & the podcasts that got Simon through.

• Leo's first job, first pay-packet & first tax!

• Major life milestones.

• The songs, films and other things that get a Christmas pass or bonus, even though they're rubbish.

• Lorra's naked housesitter anecdote.

• Simon's naked backpacking story.

We might try to record a special 50th birthday special tomorrow. Thanks for listening. Don't forget to give us 5 stars, leave a nice review. Always nice to read. And tell your friends about us.

See you next time.

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Hello again! First of all, a massive apology for the gap in podcasts. All will be explained within the pod. We cover Simon's 50th and a very emotional birthday video montage, Christmas Fayres, trying to get our son, Leo, home from university and th monumental (and expensive) f**k-up he made along the way.

We talk about a "kids say the funniest things" incident that happened at home, plus two versions of that happening to us as kids, too.

We also talk about our plans for podcasts over Christmas, New Year and a one-off special we're going to do of our first podcast series, Fantasy Reboot... We're getting the old team back together for one night only!!!

Hope you enjoy today's podcast. It's really nice to be back. As you'll hear, one or more of us will be at the airport at 2am tomorrow. We'll report on how that went next time.

x

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Our podcasts... They're like buses. You wait for weeks then two come at once, etc. Well, we are trying to make them regular, now we've got a bit more time. Today, on very little or no sleep since the last episode, we talk airport pick-ups, anxiety, the Christmas editions of the Radio Times & TV Times and how even they can be depressing. We talk 'Display Nuts' and other balls we've seen on display. We talk about Influencers in the Wild. If you haven't seen it, look it up on Twitter or Instagram. Trigger warning... It will make you say the C-word a heck of a lot. We talk about getting Lorra on 'Only Fans' to see if she can make £10,000 per month without doing anything revealing.

Thanks for listening. We'll see you soon x

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Hello! Today we talk Lorra's birthday and how she rated it, Simon surviving brunch, Lorra's cha-cha trousers, a double dress fail and subsequent tailor slutcut, watching the new Spiderman, the no-booze hangover and random Twitter diagnosis, Lorra's karaoke tone-deafness, Simon's undiagnosed autism rearing its head with The Beatles, a going-to-the-mall mistake, recommending 'A Boy Called Christmas',

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Hello! It's Christmas Eve Eve! From our own Santa's Grotto, where two busy little elves have been wrapping, we talk about how The Beatles have big-time ruined our Christmas, people adopting the Shagvent Calendar™, pizza oven night, trendy garden string lights, lots of films we've been watching, at what age you start respecting your home, not feeling the Christmas snack vibes and loads more.

We're going to try to get a Christmas Day episode recorded for anyone who is finding themselves alone, or driving, or away from loved ones... So we'll see you then. x

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Hello and Merry Christmas! We've just popped in for a chat on Christmas Eve. The sun has just gone down. Lorra has just taken Betsy Pearl for her bath whilst Simon (and the elves) prepared her Christmas Eve Box. We chat about not having the Christmas vibes, peeling the veg, crying at the telly, a great TV recommendation, not being pretentious when you do a buffet/spread and more of this and that.

Thank you so much for listening. Hope you're getting to spend Christmas with whoever you want to be with and we hope the big fella brings you exactly what you deserve. We've got our big fat review of 2021 coming before New Year and maybe one or two pods in-between. Until then, stay safe. Lots of love x

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Hello! Happy New Year! It's New Year's Day and, as we've not managed to get a podcast done since Christmas Eve, here's a bit of a Christmas catch-up, a talk about the between-days and New Year. Plus we discuss the current, perfect get-out excuse and some of the board games and films we've been enjoying over the last week.

Enjoy and we'll see you next time! x

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Hello again. Lorra didn't want to record today but we persevered an, as a result, have a podcast for you. We talk New Years Day and the rush to cook, the lousy weather, Simon's perfect family day with Beatles Lego & Beatles music, going back to school, podcast plans and more.

We recommended (click for trailers):

Tick Tick Boom: https://bit.ly/3JxAzAO

The Last Train to Christmas: https://bit.ly/3mW395b

The Electrical Life of Louis Wain: https://bit.ly/3EM03a4

See you next time!

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Hello! First of all, apologies for the audio quality in the second half of today's podcast. We've been desperately trying to get into our little studio and record but time has been against us. We decided to record half in the studio pre-school pick-up and half on the roof of Starbucks (very Beatles-esque). Sadly Simon's mic didn't record at Starbucks, so we've had to try to rescue what audio we could from Lorra's mic, hence the quality. Didn't have time to run proper diagnostics beforehand. It's been crazy.

On today's episode, Simon talked about positivity for 2022 then Lorra started crying almost as soon as we got out of the gate. The reason for this quickly becomes apparent. We talk about Leo leaving, Christmas leaving, villa troubles, decision fatigue, having a cat in the bedroom during sex, our kids uncanny inability to need us at inappropriate times and lots more.

We also had plenty of recommendations today. They were:

Encanto: https://bit.ly/322tDLi

Four Lives: https://bit.ly/3I5bHyM

Limitless Win: https://bit.ly/31Xfv5X

Weird Walk (Charlie Cooper podcast): https://bit.ly/3qpQzx8

We'll be back soon. Promise to do mic checks! x

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TRIGGER WARNING: On today's episode, we talk about breast cancer in depth and how it's affected us over the Christmas period.

Hello. We're back! So soon!!! Simon has done a 4hr radio show today, followed by a 2hr podcast interview from the UK and feels like he's doing what he describes as the 'radio knobhead world record attempt' (apologies to all radio knobheads who've attempted the radio knobhead world record attempt. No offence meant).

On today's episode we talk about:

• Simon's John Lennon guitar Christmas pressie saga.

• The freerstyle slippers song and whether or not it's sexy.

• Breast Cancer and breast cancer scares.

• A request to share the school runs.

• Leo's first report back from the UK... Clubbing with a boyish ID.

• Lorra's extols the virtues of Dubai's version of Lidl/Aldi.

• Fanny wash.

No recommendations today (unless you count Dubai's Lidl or the fanny wash.

Thanks for listening. See you next time x

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Hello again! Keen to get the settings right on the roving mics which Simon messed-up so badly on ep.72, we recorded the drive to fetch the little devil from her performing arts school, during which time we talked about...

• Lorra feeling a bit poorly.

• Simon describing how the first weekend proper of the new year has left him feeling lost.

• Simon & Lorra's review of the evening crisps of Viva (Dubai's Lidl).

• Falling for the little devil's screen time addiction.

• At what age can you leave the kids home alone?

• Why bedroom time should not be planned.

• #CheeseOnToastGate and Lorra almost murdering Simon.

Thanks for listening. Don't forget to rate the podcast wherever you listen to us and feel free to drop us a line any time.

See you next time x

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Hello! We haven't seen each other all day and basically switched the mics on as soon as we both got home. There's a bit of tension which we didn't want to talk about but almost did. We also covered...

• Some replies to your comments regarding past podcasts.

• Blue Monday and it's self-fulfilling prophecy properties.

• Betsy Pearl being accident prone.

• The couple Simon found on his car.

• The invention of 'Long term marriage response' #LTMR

• The myth about music playing during sex being sexy.

• More on planning stuff as parents and how it ruins everything.

Thanks for listening. If you have examples of any 'long term marriage response' material, please get in touch - husbandandwifepod@gmail.com

Here's that clip of Kirsten Dunst on Jonathan Ross that put Simon off her... https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YRl15bvCrX4

Maybe he was overreacting!

See you next time x

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Hello. Happy Friday! Today we're talking...

• Meat Loaf memories.

• Ooni pizza ovens and hating stuff that's popular.

• A bank fraud update.

• Our feelings on automated phone services.

• An unplanned night out (and afters).

• Some follow-up on Simon's blinky OCD.

• Simon chatted to James Blunt about sex music.

• We talk (with no spoilers) about our feelings towards 'After Life'.

Here's the full interview with James Blunt: https://bit.ly/3KxRtQs

And here's our email: husbandandwifepod@gmail.com - Get in touch. We love your feedback!

Thanks for listening. See you next time x

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Hello! Today we're talking...

• Weather.

• Stolen weekends.

• Theme Parks.

• Lorra's reaction to hot food.

• Lorra's attempt at the takeaway triple.

• The dog at death's door.

• The cats bedroom surprise.

• The vet.

• The different leagues/divisions of pizza.

Enjoy! If you want to get in touch, please email us at husbandandwifepod@gmail.com

We'd like to hear about your strange obsessions. Such as picking every lump or scratch on your body repeatedly forever. Or blinking between every white line as you drive along the road. Or clenching alternate buttocks as you pass lampposts on the street.

Plus we want to know what song, if any, could be played to increase enjoyment during sexy time.

And we'd like to know anything you've avoided simply because they were too popular with other people. Simon has done this with Jurassic Park, Ooni pizza ovens, Bridgerton, Four Weddings, Love Actually, Broadway musicals & loads more. Lorra did it with Titanic & Wordle.

Drop us a line.

See you next time x

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Hello! Today we rabbit-on for a good while about:

• Simon's "Hey man!" accidental, constant misgendering.

• Inside Out Day.

• Lorra's life goal.

• The 'cheer-up' delivery to an empty house.

• The psychology of hating Wordle.

• When cheap is better than posh (cheesecake edition).

• Words that you say wrong but it's too late to change.

• Cassette tapes.

• The arts festival we've just been to.

Get in touch - husbandandwifepod@gmail.com

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Hello you! Another episode so soon after the last ramble. Yes! But we had a few good things to talk about...

• James Blunt debrief.

• Lorra getting on the Wordle bandwagon.

• The etymology of "Jurassic Parking".

• Things we've "Jurassic Parked" (old & new).

• Lorra's horrible "Would You Rather?" question.

AS ever, we'd love to hear from you on anything we've talked about, or anything you'd like to hear us talk about. You can email us at husbandandwifepod@gmail.com or message either of us on our socials:

Simon Twitter

Lorra Twitter

Simon Insta

Lorra Insta

Something we would like to hear from you on is when is cheap better than posh? Give us your examples and we'll give you a mention on the next episode.

C U Next Time x

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Hello! Let's start with our email for contact...

husbandandwifepod@gmail.com

Please get in touch about anything... Replies to our discussions, your thoughts, your ideas, your Wordle scores... We love to hear from you.

On episode 80 of HAWSTL, we talk...

• Lorra's surprise look on the dog walk today.

• Zoflora, Swarfega & the vaginal douche.

• David Guetta's 4am alarm call.

• The ballad of the broken iPad.

• Insomnia and pillows.

• A Jurassic Parking update.

• A question about VD (Valentine's Day).

• Sorbet Sex.

• Simon's Valentine's radio idea.

• A Wordle update.

• Toast toppings.

We mentioned My Pillow Perfect (who kindly offered us free pillows, which we declined!) and we recommended The Puppet Master and Yellowjackets (click for trailers).

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Hello! Once again, if you'd like to contact the pod, drop us an EMAIL. We popped into the studio straight after rolling out of bed for today's chat. We have...

• Your toast feedback.

• Marriage and being 'monogam-ish'.

• Rhubarb & Custard Creams.

• Is there too much choice nowadays?

• Lorra's crafty Viva (DubAldi) pop-in.

• Encountering spite drivers.

• A dad taxi debacle.

We also sort-of recommended The After Party (click for trailer). To be honest, it's pretty average at best.

If you're not following us already, click to follow Lorra on Insta or Simon on Insta (Simon will be posting various questions on Instagram stories which will feature on HAWSTL.

See you next time x

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Hello! A quick (well, half hour) catch-up featuring...

• The Britishness of crisps in the car.

• Lorra's profoundly in love with Zoflora.

• A baby jam update.

• The pre-recording bank text.

• Bamber Gascoigne & side facts.

• Promising quiz meetings.

• Paying £50 for eight doughnuts.

• Lorra dabbling with the send-once photo option.

• Simon's Stats (with music).

• The Winter Olympics & The After Party.

Hope you enjoy it. As ever, you can email us at husbandandwifepod@gmail.com or hit us up on the old socials.

See you next time! x

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Ideally you should listen to today's podcast with your partner. We take a deep dive into a survey of thousands of married couples, regarding what the ingredients to a happy marriage is. Trigger warning... One of the statistics CAN NOT BE RIGHT!!! Before that, Simon asks Lorra a hypothetical question about Coldplay's upcoming Expo 2020 concert and we discuss how today's Wordle answer was in American English and how too many twunts tweeted about this and inadvertently gave out a clue. That behaviour needs to stop.

See you next time x

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Hello! We've popped in for a quick Friday session, talking...

• An accidental swimming cat.

• The kicked cat.

• The main animal men throughout life.

• Hairdresser bravery.

• Filming at Global Village.

• Lorra's small army of Coldplay clickers.

• When 'old' actually is.

• A top-notch Russian security guard.

• Lorra's hiking surprise.

As you'll hear, we are going hiking first thing tomorrow morning apparently. Follow our exploits on Simon's Instagram Stories - @catboy92

We will hopefully be back tomorrow with a post-hike report. That might be quite sweary.

See you next time x

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As announced, somewhat surprisingly, by Lorra on yesterday's podcast, we were going hiking today. This is the "what happened when we went hiking in the United Arab Emirates" episode. We discuss...

• Yellowjackets (top tier TV, which we finished last night).

• Lorra's hiking prep last night.

• Air-frying.

• A later start than we'd wanted.

• Simon's proper hiking shoes & baby-skin feet.

• Failed attempts to get coffee.

• Middle-management weekend bikers.

• Our hatred & fear of clubs.

• Ain Al Ghamour.

• The drive home and in-car dining.

• Singalong-a-musicals.

• Simon deploying his 'zen arse cork' meditation skills.

• What hurts since getting back.

• A go on the vibey-sex-gun (massage gun).

• Baths.

Here's roughly where we went hiking.

See you next time x

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Hello! Today we are talking about...

• The WASSAP/WHAZZAP phenomenon.

• A Coldplay tickets update.

• Internet reliability.

• "Spencer", the pointless Princess Di film (trailer).

• The couples version of standing on Lego.

• Our deep-dive review of visiting our friends' house.

• A Valentine's Day surprise for Lorra is revealed LIVE!

Hope you enjoy it. We'd love a review, a 5-star rating and a pyramid-scheme-style recommendation system. Yo tell ten friends about our podcast, they each tell ten of their friends and soon the whole world will be promising to give it a listen before forgetting all about it.

See you next time x

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Hello! Big and busy one today. Talking:

• Valentine's Day debrief.

• Coldplay shenanigans.

• Simon outing Lorra's gig-negatives.

• Lorra did her first Insta live... ish.

• Lorra teaches Simon about Modibodies.

• Bad day at the dentist.

• The return of nut-fisting.

• Some listener feedback.

Here's where you can get that lavender vegan chocolate: Amazon

Here are links to today's recommendations...

Marry Me (our Valentine's romcom): Trailer

The Rescue (thrilling documentary): Trailer

This is Going to Hurt (doctor drama): Trailer

That's all folks!

See you next time x

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The majority of this episode centres on our early morning hike to Showka in the mountains of the UAE today. In fact, the first couple of minutes are actually on the hike, then we're back in the studio.

Click here for photos: https://bit.ly/3H2Bo20

Click here for Simon's Insta-stories travelogue: https://bit.ly/3oZ4h9c

Recommendations...

The Lost Daughter. Trailer: https://bit.ly/3uZiwPh

Riz Ahmed's Oscar-nominated short film, which we both rated 10/10, The Long Goodbye. Before you click the link for the full film, please be aware it's probably best not watched with little kids: https://bit.ly/3I5hwwL

As always, thanks for listening. Like, subscribe, follow, rate, comment... Whatever.

See you next time x

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Hello! First of all, we're back quizzing! If you fancy a great night out, where we will be gathering content for podcasts as we quiz, here are the details...

The Dubai Quiz with Catboy & Lorra

8-10pm Wednesday 2nd March 2022

Oak Live Bar, Courtyard by Marriott Al Barsha

(Behind Mall of Emirates)

Book your tables by Whatsapp - 050 113 9873

Back to the podcast. We talk...

• Dubai's Museum of the Future.

• Lorra's Expo shenanigans.

• Petrol station anxiety.

• A diddling ghost in the villa.

See you next time x

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Hello hello! Simon was test-running a new hotkeys app today. It wasn't perfect but he'll fine-tune it. On today's episode we talk...

• Falling in love at the tennis.

• Hollywood celeb closeness.

• The No-Booze Hangover.

• A really unusual shower gel issue.

• Lorra's Facts Machine.

• Simon's unfortunate neighbour incident.

See you next time x

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Hello! Simon is at Death's door, as are all men who have the sniffles. But, like the trooper he is, he limped to the studio to record this episode. Was it worth it? Well, there's a decent bottle joke in there. We also talked about...

• Simon interviewing Paul Zerdin (watch: https://youtu.be/RyXV4dXoLmo ).

• Betsy Pearl interviewing Paul Zerdin (watch: https://youtu.be/uDjdRTZnWAo ).

You can buy tickets for Paul's amazing show at platinumlist.net if you're listening to this before he leaves. Well worthwhile. It's happening at Theatre By QE2, which is a smashing venue. We also mentioned...

• Another interview, this time with Russell Peters (watch: https://bit.ly/3tsKhNB ).

• Our first quiz night since the pandemic started!

• Another no-booze hangover.

• An unusual time to request bedroom activity.

• A Friday miracle (Simon's reaction: https://bit.ly/3sIwymY )

• Our son's coy tattoo revelation on Zoom.

As ever, thanks for listening and if you're in Dubai and would like to come to our quiz, you can book tables via Whatsapp on 050 113 9873. It is the best quiz night in Dubai. Not showing off. It just is 😜

See you next time x

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Hello! Just popped in for a smorgasbord of a Sunday Service. The links we talked about are below. We talking about...

• Hitting the coffee wall.

• Another Expo visit.

• Paul Zerdin's show (he got us on stage).

• The poo-bag dispenser receptacle.

• The poo-avalanche occurrence.

• Several Starbucks issues.

• Sexy morning hair.

• Lorra's 'Brian Harvey' incident.

• Little-big injuries.

• The show's casual farter.

• The off-brand loo-roll issue.

• We try playing 3-in10.

LINKS...

Betsy Pearl's Expo Vox-Pops: https://bit.ly/3pCKU6o

The Brian Harvey Blue Plaque: https://bit.ly/3Knf318

Us on stage with Paul Zerdin: https://bit.ly/3Mu14IM

Heardle (like Wordle but songs): https://www.heardle.app/

We're out with our quiz night every Wednesday at Oak Live Bar, Courtyard By Marriott Al Barsha. Bookings can be made by Whatsapping 050 113 9873 but it does sell-out very fast, so get booking.

Thanks for listening.

See you next time x

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A very busy episode today...

• Statistics round-up.

• Pop vs rock.

• More on loo roll brand loyalty.

• Lazy emoji.

• Holding a grudge.

• Wheels vs Doors.

• The gross shower gel video: https://bit.ly/37n7BFk

• Driving both the girls to school.

• Poorly food research.

• Wordle Golf Rules (with inventor, Rob).

• Lorra's cash machine rant.

• Simon's unusual delivery man spot.

• The dog and the baguette.

• Simon's Ronan Keating interview: https://bit.ly/3tc6RLP

Hopefully we'll squeeze another podcast in before the end of the weekend. Thanks for listening.

See you next time x

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Hello! We popped-in to record episode 094 of Husband & Wife Sentenced to Life because there's a heck of a lot going on. We talk...

• St Patrick's Day.

• Fresh Covid troubles.

• A few statistics.

• Adult embarrassment.

• A Wordle Golf update.

• The new emoji updates.

• Netflix doing the dirty.

• West Side Story.

• Turning Red.

• The Adam Project.

See you next time! x

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We're still stuck at home with the Covid kid but popped into the studio to record our thoughts. Today we cover...

• Simon's new studio cable-board (nerd).

• Wordle Golf feelings - https://bit.ly/3N90H6Q

• Hot Cross Bun News - https://bit.ly/3N6kxQ6

• How to spell "sjuzch/zjuidge"!!!

• Our new game we invented... Deliveroulette.

• Pete Doherty getting clean - https://bit.ly/3JuzIQS

• His new music - https://bit.ly/3D1D6AC

• Finishing 'This is Going to Hurt'.

• Our thoughts on 'Licorice Pizza' - https://bit.ly/3KUV4au

• Extraordinary Portraits - https://bbc.in/3Jrs8Xi

We'll be back soon with a restaurant episode because we've had some pretty out-there issues over the last couple of weeks. We'd love to hear from you on anything really but from this pod... How do you spell SCHJUZCCH (or whatever it is)? And what do you think of Deliveroulette? Hit us up on social media or email s directly here: husbandandwifepod@gmail.com

See you next time x

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Hello! Sorry about the delay in pods this last week. We're both in funny moods. Not funny-ha-ha. More like funny-oh-****-off-I'm-shutting-myself-in-a-room-for-three-months-funny. However, we're dragged ourselves into our cosy little studio and knocked-out episode 096 of Husband & Wife Sentenced to Life and today we talk about...

• Our states of mind.

• The Will Smith incident.

• Mother's Day.

• A digression about an amazing shop.

• First-time flowers.

• A truly terrifying Escape Room.

• Being the kind of family we hate.

• The high-tabled roast.

• The aed130,000 wrist & big gangster money!

• The really bad Sprite incident.

• Dyson's stupid April Fools Day story.

We'll be back again in a couple of days with the next episode. Until then, enjoy, feel free to give s a 5-star rating on Apple podcasts, leave a lovely message and tell your bloody friends about us!

See you next time x

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Hello! So, we're trying to get the episodes back to our original brief or around/under half an hour. We don't mind listening to long podcasts and maybe you do or don't but we'd rather do shorter ones regularly than miss two weeks and then spew-out the audio equivalent of the Lord of the Rings trilogy, expect about bodily functions and being broke. Speaking of which, on today's episode of Husband & Wife Sentenced to Life...

• April Fools Day.

• Ramadan.

• Why we can't speak Arabic but could learn French.

• Nightmare money scenario.

• The end of Expo.

• An extremely lucky catch.

• The lemon tree.

• Readying the back garden for entertainment.

• The World Cup draw.

• Dodgy car park murder weapons.

We also got back on to a few reviews...

• CODA - https://bit.ly/3LDiP7c

• Nightmare Alley - https://bit.ly/3DA4mWR

• Drive My Car - https://bit.ly/38giQzH

• Belfast - https://bit.ly/3uLJXKF

• Cyrano - https://bit.ly/3J0Qvds

And here's the beautiful song from Cyrano (Wherever I Fall) we talk about - https://bit.ly/378RURL

Okay. That'll do for today. Any feedback is always welcome. Email us here: husbandandwifepod@gmail.com

See you next time x

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Hello! On today's STILL NOT 30 MINS episode of 'Husband & Wife Sentenced to Life' podcast we talk about...

• Having an empty house tonight.

• The Batman.

• The cinema vs home movies.

• Our kids getting smashed on coffee.

• Adventure Park & vomitting.

• Last night's memorial to a lost friend.

• Lorra's fringe issue.

• Lorra's tipping nightmare.

We also recommended/reviewed a couple of things...

When We Were Bullies (short film): https://bit.ly/3r2Y3X8

Also, two podcasts we highly recommend...

How Do You Cope with Elis & John

Shaun Keaveny's Creative Cul de Sac

That'll do! We're off to The Batman.

See you next time x

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Hello hello! On today's wafflecopter, we talk about...

• Simon still having his shoes on 5 hours after getting home from work.

• Lorra grafting.

• Lorra's 'Goodfella's wives at a BBQ' outfit.

• Our son arriving from uni in the UK.

• Tonnes of DIY before he gets here.

• Our youngest and the Mumiso(?) shop.

• Bad Cinderella song covers.

• Our thoughts on watching 'The Batman' & 'Bad Guys'.

• The World cup of #HAWTSL updates (including Hellman's gravy mayo, Best Bruce, Best Takeaway, Best Chips, Best Tea, Best Bruce Willis Thing, Best Airport Duty Free Treat & Worst People in the Cinema).

• 24hrs of the worst mother/daughter farting ever witnessed.

• Daughter dramas on the airport run later.

• A great '99' joke for all husbands to se every single night forever.

If you'd like to get in touch or whatever, this is where we can be found...

SIMON TWITTER

LORRA TWITTER

SIMON INSTA

LORRA INSTA

FANTASY REBOOT (Our other podcast)

See you next time! x

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