Brutal Film Girl Experiment (Sarah & Emma )

Sarah starts a podcast to lure Emma to her apartment to watch one of her favorite films, Tobe Hooper's 1974  grindhouse classic "The Texas Chain Saw Massacre."  Emma reveals her trauma from the civil war ghost tours she was forced to endure as a young girl scout, Sarah discusses the grisly inspiration for the film and the chilly reception from cranky film critics, Emma survives the TCM by offering to make a Sephora run for Leatherface.

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This week, Sarah and Emma bond over Michael Haneke’s (Funny Games) unnerving character study of a repressed middle-aged piano instructor who seeks an outlet for her controversial sexual desires while in the grasp of her controlling mother.   The ladies discuss the film's central theme of the dynamics of power & control.  An 18-year old Sarah visits a rural roadside smut shop with her friends.  Emma begrudgingly gives a dramatic reading of the film’s infamous kink letter, while Sarah reads reviews from disgruntled book club women who, for some reason, were under the impression that this was a romance.

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In this week’s episode of BFGE, the ladies enjoy pre-show cocktails before they tuck into J. Michael Muro’s “democratically offensive” horror-comedy, Street Trash: a film in which a group of vagabonds living in a Brooklyn junkyard falls prey to Tenafly Viper—$1 booze that’s gone bad and turns anyone who drinks it into a technicolor puddle of slime.  Also in this episode:

• Sarah reveals why she loves living next to the toxic Meeker Avenue Plumes.
• Emma pontificates about the Vietnam War, a war in which she bravely fought, vicariously, by taking a single graduate-level seminar.
• The ladies taste test the closest booze to Tenafly Viper they could find: Richard’s Wild Irish Rose, a fortified wine that comes with its own entourage of clinically depressed fruit flies. Tune in to see if Sarah & Emma turn into fluorescent purple GOO after drinking it.

Watch along (currently free on Tubi) & melt with us!

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On this week’s episode of BFGE, Sarah & Emma celebrate their annual trip to Coney Island by watching Walter Hill’s 1979 hyper-masculine New York City fairy tale, the Warriors. The film centers on a fictitious NYC street gang who must travel 30 miles from the the Bronx to their home turf on Coney Island, fighting off a bunch of kooky rivals gangs along the way, after they are framed for the murder of a charismatic gang leader. 

• The ladies discuss the best and worst gangs and all their adorable little gang aesthetics.
• Emma tells the tale of Balto, a noble dog that did NOT save New York City.
• Sarah discusses the critical reception to the film when it was released in 1979.
• Emma regrets asking Sarah for a sexy and cool gang nickname, while Sarah doubts Emma’s commitment to co-hosting the podcast.

Come ride the cyclone with us!

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• The ladies discuss whether polyamory can ever work (no).
• Sarah gives some historical insight into why the Germans took a 50 year hiatus from making horror films after the 1930s (you know why).
• The ladies discuss the ethics of the controversial rabbit scene.
• Emma asks the tough questions: Why is there always a sequel?  Are there ticks in Germany?  Why does Joe's street sweeping agency only clean up dead bodies, and only in the woods?  Why didn't anyone invite the corpse to breakfast?  

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In this very sensual episode of BFGE, the ladies watch nepo baby Jennifer Lynch's 1993 box office dumpster fire, Boxing Helena: a film about a wealthy surgeon (Julian Sands) who becomes obsessed with a seductive woman (Sherilyn Fenn) with whom he once had an affair.  Refusing to accept that she has zero romantic interest in him, he lovingly amputates her limbs and holds her captive in his stately mansion.

In this episode:

• The ladies debate how much simping is too much simping.
• Sarah discusses the Boxing Helena lawsuit that bankrupted Kim Basinger.
• Emma comes to terms with the fact that she is a mere facsimile of a woman because she owns neither a candelabra nor lime cordial.
• Emma rebuffs Sarah's hypothesis about body integrity identity disorder (BIID), a rare mental health condition where individuals feel that a healthy limb or body part should not be part of their body. 
• The ladies consider taking a note from the Snapewives and wedding the spirit of Julian Sands (RIP king) on the astral plane.  

Ditch your limbs and listen along with us!

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On this week's very special episode of BFGE, Sarah and Emma enlist the services of a third friend, Melbourne-native Angelique, to watch Rolf de Heer's singular and indescribable Australian absurdist black comedy "Bad Boy Bubby".  The film centers around the titular Bubby: a man who has spent thirty-five years trapped in a small room with his abusive mother.  After he finally manages to escape, his adventure into a dazzling and nihilistic life begins.  The ladies drill down on the tough questions in this one, including:

• Is Angelique still Australian enough to watch this film?
• Is this just Nick Cave's origin story?
• Was the original cut of this film actually 4 hours long?
• Does God hate fat sluts?
• Does Little Caesars know where Tubi is placing its "Crazy Puffs" ads?

Come and join the Bubby band with us!

Bad Boy Bubby is currently free to watch on Tubi (ily tubi <3)

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In this week's episode of BFGE, the ladies dissect Abel Ferrara's delightfully scuzzy 1992 crime drama "Bad Lieutenant" starring Harvey Keitel as a drunk, drug-addled crooked cop investigating the rape of a young a nun.  In this episode:

• Emma loves drinking water, but Sarah thinks it's stupid and overrated.
• Sarah sheds some light on the interesting and controversial life of actress/screenwriter Zoe Lund.
• Emma is a little puritan who doesn't know what crack & smack look like.
• Can you believe fresh hot soup only cost $1.99 in 1992?
• The ladies break down their top Bad Lieutenant sins committed in this film.

Come dance along with us!


Media References:
2009 interview with Barbara Lekberg (Zoe's mother)
Zoe, Abel, et al., partying at the Chateau Marmont in 1991
Essay by Roger Lund, Zoe's ex husband

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In this very emotional episode of BFGE, the ladies celebrate Sarah's birthday by watching the infamous musical tragedy "Dancer in the Dark."   Written and directed by professional sadboy Lars Von Trier, the film stars Icelandic singer Björk as OSHA's worst nightmare: a blind Czechoslovakian immigrant operating heavy machinery while daydreaming about musicals.  Also in this episode:

• Emma is a heartless bitch who can't wait for Björk to die
• Sarah recaps the Dogme 95 filmmaking movement and incredibly polarizing reception to the film
• The ladies discuss the #metoo letter that made everyone go "haha yep that's Lars for ya"
• Emma reluctantly agrees to raise Sarah's son if she's ever hanged by the state

Come sing along with us!

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In this harrowing episode of BFGE, the ladies watch "Martyrs": a 2008 French-language psychological horror film written and directed by Pascal Laugier.  The film centers on a young woman's quest for revenge against the people who kidnapped and tormented her as a child, which leads leads her and a friend on a terrifying journey into a living hell.  In this ep:

• Sarah and Emma showcase their own martyrs du jour
• Emma is "actually traumatized" and considers quitting the podcast
• The ladies debate whether the film is misogynistic or just misanthropic

Come profoundly suffer with us!

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In this week's episode of BFGE, the ladies take a field trip to the movie theater to catch "Caligula: the Ultimate Cut (1979)" -- a complete reimagining of the reviled 1979 cult epic "Caligula," which is the world's first and last big-budget historical epic film infused with...uhh...hardcore pornography.   Tune in as:

• The ladies discuss the catty man infighting amongst Vidal (screenwriter), Brass (director), and Guccione (producer).
• Sarah almost gets fired because of Caligulaaaa.
• Emma explains why you should never eat a salad in the dark.

Watch the trailer for not THIS Caligula, but Gore Vidal's CALIGULA here.

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On this week's XXL episode of BFGE, Angelique fills in for Emma and the ladies discuss the TWO feature films of newcomer Coralie Fargeat.  For an appetizer, the ladies dissect "Revenge": Fargeat's debut film, a 2017 thriller about a young woman who thirsts for vengeance after she is raped and left for dead in the desert by three men. 

For the main course, S & A tuck into "The Substance": a new body horror film about an aging aerobics star (Demi Moore) who injects herself with a mysterious SUBSTANCE that promises to produce a younger, better version of herself (Margaret Qualley).  What could go wrong with shooting junk from a back alley medispa from hell?  Tune in to find out!

Only here for The Substance (2024)?  Discussion starts at 52:19!

External Links:
1973 Interview with Bridgette Bardot on her thoughts on aging

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In this very silly and stupid episode of BFGE, the ladies watch Todd Solondz' 1995 coming-of-age black comedy film "Welcome to the Dollhouse."  The film centers around the life of Dawn Weiner (Heather Matarazzo), an awkward seventh-grader struggling to cope with inattentive parents, jr. high bullies, her annoying younger sister, and her own insecurities in suburban New Jersey. 

Also in this episode: 

• Sarah gives away a disgusting rug.
• Emma gets sad after hearing Sarah's junior high loser stories.
• The ladies discuss their opposite thresholds for stranger danger.

Come join the special people's club with us!

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Sarah and Emma kickoff Halloween month by watching John Carpenter's arguably best film (in Sarah's opinion): his 1982 science fiction horror masterpiece "The Thing."  The film follows a spunky all-male research team in Antarctica as it is hunted by a shape-shifting alien that assumes the appearance of its victims.  Also in this episode:

• Emma loves hot adventure men wearing hats.
• Sarah discusses the origins of the film and the critical reproach upon its release.
• The ladies debate whether they're even real, whether any of this is real.

Come assimilate into us!

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Halloween month at BFGE continues with the ladies watching the godfather of slashers, Hitchcock's "Psycho": a film Emma has never seen because she's lived under a rock like a small beetle-woman for 30+ years.   Experience the twists and turns of "Psycho" as if you're seeing it for the very first time!  Watch it through the eyes of a newborn babe who knew "it was about a hotel, a woman who gets murdered, and maybe there's a weird of mom character...I think?"  That's it.  That's all she knew ( <3 love u emma).

Also in this episode:

• Cars and birds!

Come and eat aspic with us!

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In this very maternal episode of BFGE, Sarah treats her pregnant friend Amanda to a showing of "À l'intérieur" (Inside): a 2007 French slasher film written and directed by Alexandre Bustillo and Julien Maury.  The film stars Béatrice Dalle as a scissor-wielding psychopath who terrorizes a pregnant widow (Alysson Paradis) on Christmas Eve.  Although all BFGE episodes have a ~content warning~, this one has a ~content warning++~, please listen at your own risk!

Also in this episode:

• Sarah beefs with her granola-making upstairs neighbors.
• The ladies discuss the best and worst of the new French extremity movement.
• Amanda makes Sarah dispose of an old toothbrush far scarier than anything the mind of a depraved French filmmaker could ever conjure up.

Come and practice lamaze* with us!

1988 interview with the beautiful & charismatic Beatrice Dalle
(the pre-film interstitial is from a 1960s natural childbirth workshop)

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In this very special episode of BFGE, Sarah celebrates Emma's return from Italy by making her watch one of her favorite Italian horror films, Cemetery Man (Italian: Dellamorte Dellamore) directed by Michele Soavi.  The film stars Rupert Everett as Francesco Dellamorte, the beleaguered caretaker of Buffalora cemetery where the dead rise from their graves, whose lonely existence is suddenly upended by the arrival of a mysterious beautiful woman (Anna Falchi).  Also in this episode:

• Emma gets a bottle of prosecco dumped on her head.  Did she deserve it?
• Sarah discuses director Michele Soavi's interesting career trajectory and his work with Italian horror masters Argento and Fulci.
• The ladies debate the meaning of life and death and share their views on the film's ending.

Come and dig a grave with us!

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In this very goofed up episode of BFGE, the ladies get a cinematic lobotomy by watching Ralph Bakshi's legendary disaster film "Cool World."  The film stars Gabriel Byrne as Jack Deebs, as ex-con cartoonist who gets released from prison only to be sucked into a parallel cartoon universe he thinks he created.  There he meets Holli Would (Kim Basinger), a sultry cartoon vixen hell-bent on having sex with a human man so she too can become human, and Frank Harris (Brad Pitt), a hard-boiled detective whose only job is to enforce Cool World's oldest law: NOIDS do NOT have sex with DOODLES.  

Also in this episode:

- Sarah explains the scientific reason men yearn for sex with cartoons

- Emma defends the film as a feminist masterpiece and trailblazer in American Science fiction

- The ladies talk Daenerys Targaryen chatbot mistresses, secret santa hentai magazines, Moby's self-cancellation, Cool World sex loopholes and more

Come get sucked into Cool World with us!   

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On the season finale of BFGE, the ladies watch "Demon" (2015): a genre-defying (horror?  comedy?  drama?) Polish film written and directed by Marcin Wrona, released shortly prior to his tragic and untimely death.  The film unwinds a tale of a bridegroom possessed by an unquiet spirit (a "dybbuk") in the midst of his own wedding celebration.

Join us as we talk Jewish folklore, polish history, & shitty weddings, and ask our loyal listeners to choose the destination for the last wild bachelorette party we will ever attend in our mortal lives.  

Interstitial audio: "The Dybbuk" (Der Dibuk), 1937 -- Clip: The Dance of Death

We love you! Have a safe and joyous holiday and new year!

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In this never-to-be-repeated BFGE special, Sarah lets Emma choose the film as a special birthday surprise, and emma seizes the opportunity to subject Sarah to a whole new species of brutality: the 2001 romantic comedy nightmare "Bridget Jones's Diary."  This nihilist masterpiece centers on a tragic 32 year-old British woman who finally takes control of her life through a radical act of countercultural protest: by keeping a diary where she tracks her calories and talks about men.  Is Sarah just a huge bitch or is Emma delusional?  Perhaps we are both wrong.  Let us know.

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On the season 2 premiere of BFGE, the ladies tuck into the 1970 Czech surrealist masterpiece "Valerie and Her Week of Wonders" in advance of their upcoming trip to Prague (selected by you, the listeners).  The film follows a young girl on the cusp of womanhood as she's preyed upon by lecherous priests, vampires, and basically every fucking person in the village.  As Emma said, "she's just trying to live!"  The girls also talk heirloom roosters, public school system menstrual swag bags, evil Czech directors, and post office birds.

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On this very contagious episode of BFGE, Emma endures 98 minutes of Herman Yau’s infamous Category III Hong Kong shocker "Ebola Syndrome."  The film tells the rags-to-riches story of Kai, a psychopathic and unhygienic restaurant worker who contracts Ebola from one of his victims only to start two deadly outbreaks in South Africa and Hong Kong.

Also in this episode:

• Emma stuns with her knowledge of the deadly disease by crushing the official Ebola Virus Quiz that Sarah made up on her commute home from work.
• Sarah tells the true grisly story of the 1985 Macanese "Pork Bun Murders" that inspired the film.
• The ladies debate whether Emma's OCD is outside the realm of reasonableness.

Come catch the bug with us!

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On this very chilly episode of BFGE, Sarah and Emma get together in the bleak midwinter to watch Stephen King's infamous 1990 thriller "Misery." The ladies ask all the pressing questions including:

• Is there anything more terrifying than a scorned healthcare professional?
• Exactly how hung is Mr. King?
• Wouldn't we all want a nice little free snowy vacation so we could finish our book in peace?

Come and get hobbled with us!

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In this wildly silly episode of BFGE, Emma treks over to Sarah's freezing apartment to eat soup, huddle under a blanket, and watch "The Room" with Spanish subtitles off youtube.com.  Mmmm feels like it's 2008 and our meal cards just got declined at the dining hall again.

In this episode:

• The Greg Sestero audiobook
• Lisa looks hot tonight
• Chris R. and the beanie of mal-intent!
• Tommy Wiseau's flying vampire car

Come and get fed up with this world with us!

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In this very giggly episode of BFGE, Emma shocks Sarah by warming up to Michael Haneke’s infamous home invasion satire "Funny Games."  The ladies debate the film's artistic merit, Sarah reads angry zero star film reviews, and Emma urges audiences to #believewomen.

Also in this episode:

• Sarah makes a bad investment
• European beef hands
• Sarah apologizes to Emma for blocking her on instagram
• Emma's ready to stab any man that asks for a cup of sugar

Apologies for poor audio quality in the first half, it self corrects later.  We don't know how to work computer.

#michaelhaneke #funnygames

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